Come Together
Rock Hard: Book 2
Madelynne Ellis

Copyright

Mischief

An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishers

77–85 Fulham Palace Road,

Hammersmith, London W6 8JB

www.mischiefbooks.com

Copyright © Madelynne Ellis 2014

Madelynne Ellis asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.

Ebook Edition © 2014 ISBN: 9780007579525

Version: 2014–09–04

Contents

Cover

Title Page

Copyright

Prologue

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Chapter 29

Chapter 30

Chapter 31

Chapter 32

Chapter 33

Chapter 34

Chapter 35

Chapter 36

Chapter 37

Chapter 38

Chapter 39

Chapter 40

Chapter 41

Chapter 42

Chapter 43

Chapter 44

Chapter 45

Chapter 46

Chapter 47

Author’s Note

More from Mischief

About Mischief

About the Publisher

Prologue
Sweden. Three years ago …

‘I should get you one of those,’ Xane remarked to his best friend Steve Matlock, pointing out the slogan on the T-shirt of the guy standing at the end of the VIP bar.

‘“I love to bang,”’ Steve read, and chuckled over the stick-figure drawing of a man beating the hell out of a set of drums. ‘Like it. Do you reckon there’s a whole set, so we can have one each?’ The pair were two sixths of the rock band Black Halo, and they’d just blown the frigging minds of the thousands-strong crowd around the main stage at the Sölvesborg Rock Festival with their explosive gothic freak-show. While the rest of the band members were still scrawling their signatures over various pieces of female anatomy, Xane and Steve had slipped into the VIP tent for some celebratory drinks. After all, it wasn’t every day you went platinum before breakfast and got to psych the crowd up for Ozzy in the evening. Xane figured he’d be riding this particular high for weeks, if not months. It’d been a long while coming, but their dedication was finally paying off.

‘What would Ash’s say?’

‘“I love licking,”’ Xane suggested. Their lead guitarist was widely rumoured to have a magic tongue. Chances were he was giving it a workout right now, charming the panties off their female fans in order to guarantee their future loyalty. It certainly spread the word about them more successfully than any flyer campaign.

‘Yeah, and “I love to touch base” for Paul. And maybe “I practise the rhythm method” for Spook.’

‘Except he doesn’t.’ Their rhythm guitarist Spook Mortensen didn’t need to employ contraceptive methods because he never had sex, a fact Xane still struggled to get his head around. He wasn’t sure how anyone managed to function without getting horizontal on a regular basis – like a minimum of three times a day and preferably more. Not that he insisted on being horizontal – he was equally happy getting his rocks off standing, sitting or swinging from the rafters. Hell, in pretty much any position imaginable. He was flexible like that. Xane was flexible about a lot of things, which was how he’d come to move on from the interesting shirt to the far more interesting body beneath it, and the very cute guy to whom it belonged. And he did mean very cute.

‘What would yours say?’ Steve asked, still focused on clothing slogans.

‘“Throat job.”’

‘“Throat job,” seriously? That makes it sound like you’re up for sucking dick … Oh!’ Steve caught up with the direction in which Xane’s thoughts had wandered. ‘I guess you are. You know that doesn’t guarantee he is?’

‘He is.’ The guy had been casting him not so surreptitious glances since they’d walked in.

‘I think it’s more likely he’s out to bang chicks.’

The guy had two of them hanging on his every word, but neither had his attention. That was hotly focused on Xane. The man was literally eating him up with that five-yard stare.

Xane didn’t recognise him but, with 30-something groups on the roster ranging from virtual unknowns to the megastars of the genre, that was no big surprise. What he did recognise was a man dedicated to his craft. You only got arms like that, a physique like that, through drumming. He knew. He’d admired Steve’s body often enough.

‘Can’t you stick to wrapping your lips around a bottle?’ Steve ordered them another two beers.

Xane whistled an uh-uh sound across the neck of his beer. Alcohol just didn’t give him the same warm and fuzzies as a robust workout. It had a habit of making him miserable instead, and tonight he intended to stay firmly in the happy camp. He was not going to wallow in the shitty events of his past. Fuck his siblings, fuck his parents and … you know, fucking sounded like a really good plan right now.

‘All right, so let’s go find ourselves some nice young ladies.’

‘Actually, I’m good with what’s on offer here.’

Steve turned his back to the bar and chugged another mouthful of beer. Concern lines furrowed the area between his wing-like brows. ‘Xane, he’s totally not hitting on you. He’s probably staring because we just played the best set of this festival.’

‘Totally is hitting on me. He’s itching to unwrap my dick and go down on me.’

The slap Steve gave the back of his head didn’t dispel the notion. Some things you just knew on a gut level, and this happened to be one of them.

‘Mate, if you go over there and suggest that, you’re going to get yourself beaten senseless.’

‘One hopes.’ So far, no one had given him an orgasm that good. Xane refused to be put off by Steve’s efforts to keep him on the straight and narrow. He didn’t see why everyone got so antsy about his mutable tastes. He patted down his jacket pockets, making sure he was all set for the fun ahead. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this happy and horny at the same time. Normally he fucked to achieve a state of contentment, and then used the little piece of cloud nine he landed on to float through the following hours without succumbing to the shit that messed with his equilibrium on a daily basis.

His response prompted Steve to pinch the bridge of his nose, which did nothing to remove the furrows. ‘You don’t know who he is. You don’t know where he’s been.’

Nor did he need to. Those things didn’t matter. He wasn’t looking for a life partner, just a quick bit of fun. ‘And the same would be true of any woman I picked up. Catch you later.’ He saluted Steve with his beer, took a final swig and left the bottle on the bar. Xane didn’t speak to the guy, he didn’t even approach him. He simply held his gaze before heading for the exit, and, what do you know, two minutes later mister blond and beautiful – who was called Luthor – was literally begging to go down on him.

Another person might have simply rolled with that, sat back, lapped up the attention and come down his throat without giving a damn thing in return. Xane disliked such selfishness. How could anyone abuse something this pretty? Besides, he wasn’t looking for a quick release. If that was all he needed, he could achieve that with his own hand. No, he wanted a long, slow, hard ride with this man, the sort that would give him the chance to savour every inch of perfection, every blessed angle.

‘Tell me what you need. Let me –’

‘Sh-h!’ Xane silenced him with some seriously devil-may-care kisses. This didn’t need to involve conversation. He didn’t want to hear about his performance. He’d already gathered the man had watched him on stage and decided then that he was willing to do pretty much anything the fuck Xane wanted him to. He didn’t want to exchange pointless pleasantries or have a heart-to-heart. What he wanted, in the words of Marc Bolan, was easy action.

Thank fuck the guy seemed to catch on quickly. Xane’s kisses were rewarded with matching fervour. Luthor had a mouth made for pleasure, wide, with a full lower lip, and it tilted upwards at the corners, making him seem cheerful even when his face was relaxed. He knew how to kiss too, unlike some men, who seemed to think it was all about being savage and clashing teeth. In fact, he seemed to know a hell of a lot about how to coax joy into being with every cell of his body. The guy had a sensuality that made Xane’s nerves vibrate – in a good way. There was a grace about him too that seemed almost at odds with his rather sharp physique. He was all long limbs, slender hips and compact muscle. Very nice to hold and undress, and no doubt a knockout to look at.

However, none of those things entranced Xane the way the man’s eyes did. He hadn’t noticed them in the VIP tent – they’d been standing too far apart – but up close, even in the dark they caught Xane’s attention and refused to release him. He’d never seen eyes like those before: one tawny, one sea-green. Natural, too, not achieved with lenses like his own Evil Dead look. Luthor possessed eyes that seemed to reflect the duality of being, making it near impossible to look away.

Normally, Xane avoided looking into the eyes of the people he fucked. It saved him from emotional entanglements he wasn’t seeking. With Luthor there didn’t seem to be any avoiding it.

‘Yeah,’ he hissed as the sweet caress of cool air tickled his skin, and Luthor formed a fist around his shaft. He swept his hold upwards in a satisfying pull towards the tip, making energy spike through all seven chakras at once. ‘Let me,’ Xane insisted, craving more skin-on-skin contact. He grabbed Luthor’s arse and grinned delightedly at the way the springy muscle tightened beneath his palm. He intended to explore every bloody inch of this man, from the pretty ridges of his hip bones to the soles of his feet. He was going to taste him and possess him, and they were both going to know what it felt like to make the universe turn.

‘Oh, man,’ Luthor gasped, as Xane dropped to his knees and yanked Luthor’s jeans down over his narrow hips without bothering to loosen them. They were barely holding up anyway, and he didn’t want to wait any longer for his prize. ‘Are you gonna …’

Yeah, he totally was. He wanted the taste of this man on his tongue, the smooth, sabre-like curve of his cock filling his mouth. Sometimes it just felt ridiculously good to engage in a bit of repetitive motion.

All right, a lot of repetitive motion, because once he’d got Luthor good and wet and excited, Xane intended to get intimately acquainted with some other fun parts of his anatomy.

Xane kept his hands busy as he sucked, and not just at the base of the guy’s cock. He squeezed, he coaxed and caressed. He wriggled his fingers someplace warm and tight and that turned Luthor into such a quivering wreck that he could barely keep himself upright and had to weave his fingers into Xane’s hair to maintain his balance.

Not long after that, they ended up on the ground, scrabbling about, too desperate for contact to disentangle themselves efficiently from one another and their clothing.

Xane didn’t notice stripping almost naked, only the inferno that burst into being when Luthor wrapped his palm around both their cocks and worked them together.

‘Have you got something?’ he asked, both clinging onto Xane and almost pushing him away at the same time. Like he wasn’t sure if this wasn’t good enough, and maybe they should come like this and avoid ramping things up any further, except he wanted the other way to happen so badly too, because the first way was too quick and would be over too fast. Neither of them was ready to part ways just yet.

Luthor’s eyes lit as Xane produced condoms and slathered them in lube. They were both breathing heavily and momentarily kiss-drunk as he got them lined up. It was easy, so very easy, as all the best fucks were. It wasn’t too tight or too awkward, there were no tense moments where they had to hold one another in check so they could breathe and relax. It was simply right. Everything worked, and it felt so goddamned wonderful that even if they did it a thousand times over it would never grow old.

Luthor mouthed the side of Xane’s neck as they fucked to the hum of ‘Paranoid’ that drifted over to them from the festival stage.

‘Bite me,’ Xane encouraged. ‘Leave a mark behind.’ He enjoyed nothing better than the feel of a lover’s mouth against his neck. It drove him fucking demented. He liked the marks they left behind too. Wore them like badges to the bemusement of the rest of the band. To Xane they were reminders that for at least a few brief moments he’d belonged, truly belonged to someone, enough for them to want to stamp their mark on him. He stamped a hell of a lot of marks all over Luthor, not that he thought for one second about actually keeping him.

He got Luthor off right before he came inside him, staring into those mesmerising mismatched eyes.

Xane floated for a few minutes, enjoying the roar of bliss in his ears and the whiplash bite of his orgasm pushing its way out of his body. It wasn’t enough, though. He went straight back down on Luthor again, got him stupidly hard. He knew a trick or two that made it easy and fun. This time round, he let Luthor do the sliding. Fair’s fair. He loved fucking, loved the feel of his cock enclosed in all that enveloping heat, but sometimes it felt damn good to be shafted too.

Xane never dished out what he couldn’t take.

It wasn’t such a straight glide with him on the bottom. It felt fucking fantastic, though. ‘God, yes!’ Luthor’s breath scalded the back of his neck as he pressed in deep. He ached as his hips rolled, but in a way that made his cock springy and hard and set his synapses alight. He didn’t care that he’d be sore tomorrow, or that he’d still be able to feel the heat of Luthor’s cock inside him, because then he could squeeze his muscles and remember. A shiver ran through him, almost making him lose it. The gig had ended, leaving the chirps of nocturnal insects as their only accompaniment. Sweat broke out across his body and pooled in the places where his and Luthor’s skin touched. The man was like a flaming brand inside him, burning him up, making him feverish, but still pushing him ever closer to an explosive reward.

Curious, how one subtle shift could make such a huge difference. Xane angled his hips up as Luthor drove forward. The tip of his cock hit Xane’s prostate. Everything moved up a gear. ‘I’ve got you,’ Luthor murmured. ‘I’ve got you.’ He held on tight, not pausing, and still fluid in his assault. ‘Stay with me. I’m almost there too. Oh, Lord, the grip of you …’

Another thrust … or two … and they hit tipping point.

For a few brief moments Xane existed entirely in a higher realm. Then he fragmented into a million pieces. Hot joy streaked along his shaft and poured from his cock. He felt the pulse of Luthor coming hard inside him. They clung together tight, and it seemed as if it might last for ever. It lasted a good long while.

Xane thought it might be the best fuck he’d ever had. He didn’t think anyone else was going to bang him half so well anytime soon. As they lay side by side, spent, while the sweat of their exhaustion cooled their overheated skin, Xane decided Luthor’s T-shirt slogan needed an addendum. ‘I love to bang’ ought to read ‘I love to bang … and I’m fucking awesome at it.’

It was a shame their paths never did cross again …

Chapter 1
England

‘Xane, they’re waiting on us. Soundcheck, now.’

Xane Geist cracked open his dressing-room door, still uncertain this was the right decision. A little over six weeks ago he’d been ready to pull the plug on Black Halo; now they were about to embark on a European tour. That was assuming they could get through a gig together, and not just because there was a slew of unresolved issues still to work out between them. Steve Matlock’s death might have officially reunited them, but it was also the reason they were all reeling in shock. If he hadn’t had Dani to hold on to, he wasn’t sure he’d have even been upright. It was hard to function when part of your heart had been ripped out. Not that Xane was any stranger to loss. He had a mantra that kept him going in difficult times. Smile. Feel. Orgasm. Bliss. It worked quite well for blotting out reality, particularly when it was recited while engaged in mindless sex.

Not that he engaged in mindless sex. Not any more. He wouldn’t do that to Dani and he didn’t fuck anyone else. He strived to keep his thoughts focused when he was fucking her. It wasn’t so difficult, since she seemed to have swallowed what was left of his heart now that Steve was gone.

Steve was gone. He still struggled with that concept. The guy was only twenty-six.

As soon as Dani got back, he was going to crush her in his arms and lock them together in a way that made them both feel good. He needed to feel good. He had to sing to a crowd tonight.

It was damn hard to sing with your throat locked tight with emotion.

He recited his mantra again, even attempted to turn the corners of his mouth up a little. It didn’t work.

Fucking was definitely on the agenda, as soon as Dani got here … literally as soon as. It wasn’t using her. He needed her. Dani knew how to take his pain away.

‘No girl with you?’ Paul ‘Rock Giant’ Reed, the band’s bass guitarist, slouched against the corridor wall opposite Xane’s door. ‘I thought you took your nubile little wench everywhere with you these days.’

Xane held his breath and counted to ten before stepping out of the room. He was not going to deck Rock Giant as his opening move, though if the idiot made any more crass remarks Xane refused to be held accountable for his actions. Dani was no groupie. She was his girlfriend, and he’d have her treated with bloody respect. ‘Shut the fuck up,’ he muttered. Rock Giant was six foot six of muscle, not counting the signature gravity-defying spikes of his hair, but Xane refused to feel intimidated. He had the same soft points as every man, and Xane would happily prove that point. Swinging his fists was sometimes almost as good as sex.

‘I just thought you might officially introduce her, since Graham informs me she’s joining us on the tour.’

Fan-bleedin’-tastic! Trust their blabbermouth of a manager, Graham Callahan, to leak that fact. In the interests of not causing undue friction – because, goddammit, there was enough already – Xane had planned to make that announcement to the band as a whole, preferably while Dani was with him, in the hope that they’d all be sweet about it. He didn’t consider that he needed their permission to invite her along, but the fewer ructions before they hit the road the better. So far, the day didn’t seem to be stacking up so well in that regard.

‘What happened to the policy of no extras on the bus, eh? If you’re bringing someone, then what’s to stop the rest of us doing the same? I don’t want to share a bus with Ash’s bloody harem.’

‘I’m not bringing someone. I’m bringing my girlfriend, which is hardly comparable to Ash inviting along a score of groupies.’ It was pretty safe to say none of them besides Ash wanted that.

‘So we’re back to one rule for you and some other crap for the rest of us?’ Rock Giant grumbled, his voice so low and grouchy it sounded like boulders colliding. ‘Might have known. Why is it you get to be such a special snowflake, Xane? We should all have to live by the same rules. I say let’s stick to the band and crew, and no hangers-on. We need to make this work, and it’ll be easier with less people around to get in the way.’

Fuck that! Dani’s coming wasn’t open to negotiation. Dani was the primary reason he was even prepared to consider this tour. She understood him in a way that pretty much everyone else didn’t, with maybe the exception of his cousin Ric Liddell.

Steve had understood him too.

Xane shut down that line of thought immediately. Thinking about Steve wasn’t going to help him keep it together.

‘It’s not as if you’ve known her very long. Have you had her background checked?’

‘Piss off!’

Rock Giant halted, pretty much forcing Xane to do the same unless he wanted to squeeze round him. ‘I won’t, and you’ll listen. Have you even considered how you bringing this girl will make Elspeth feel? You’re flaunting your new lay in front of her while she’s mourning the loss of her husband. Real sympathy you’re showing.’

‘It’s not just her loss.’ And he sure as hell didn’t owe their petite keyboardist anything. He’d tried to feel sorry for her, but she’d scarred him too deeply, and she’d certainly never considered his feelings when she ran off with his best mate to get married. ‘She dumped me, remember.’ Plus, there was the fact that he couldn’t help blaming her, at least in part, for what had subsequently happened. If Elspeth hadn’t set things in motion, then maybe, just maybe, Steve Matlock would still have been with them now.

Not that he placed the blame entirely on her. Too many variables had impacted on events. God knows, he’d been ruminating on them ever since. What if he hadn’t gone to Monaco? What if Steve hadn’t followed? What if, instead of running after the fight in the casino, he’d talked things through with Steve? That way the guy would have had someone with him. Someone to call for help. And even if the worst had still come to pass, at least Steve wouldn’t have died alone.

He had excruciating nightmares over that last fact.

‘You’re such a fuckwit, Xane. Elspeth’s lost her husband, and you’re still bemoaning the fact she dumped you for a nicer guy. She ought to be home piecing herself back together, not heading out on tour. We should have held off a while longer.’

Holding off hadn’t been an option, although he agreed that time might have benefited them all. He’d pissed off too many fans when he’d walked off stage at their last gig, and they now needed to appease them. It was past time they made up for that show and moved forward. Their real fans had cut them some slack following Steve’s tragic death, but sympathy only extended so far. It was essential they proved to the masses that they could still kick ass, and deserved the accolades they’d won.

‘Elspeth didn’t have to come,’ he said. He hadn’t forced anyone to sign up, and, to be perfectly honest, he thought the band might be happier without her. He didn’t really want her around, acting as a constant reminder.

‘You’d seriously do this without her? We’re honouring her dead husband, and you’d leave her behind? She’s the most right out of all of us to be included. I wish to God you’d admit that, instead of constantly trying to co-opt her grief.’

‘Co-opt her grief,’ he muttered, flabbergasted by Rock Giant’s gall. Xane and Steve had been best friends since they were eleven. They’d been lovers for nearly eighteen months, and had been to hell and back together several times over. Just because Steve had ultimately chosen Elspeth didn’t mean Xane’s feelings for the guy were any less sincere than Elspeth’s, or any less intense – assuming Elspeth was capable of that level of depth. He doubted the authenticity of everything she’d ever said to him, other than her delight in screwing him up when she said goodbye.

Rock Giant did so love acting as her knight protector, though. ‘You know the bit that really doesn’t add up, Xane?’ he continued, determined, it seemed, to stir things up. ‘It’s the fact that you make like you’re so devastated because the pair of them dumped you, but then you dive into bed with Dani less than twelve hours later. That’s not the action of someone who’s lost the love of his life. I don’t think you were in love. I think your pride got hurt, because they chose one another over being with you.’

‘Shut the fuck up.’ Paul didn’t know a damn thing. Only what Elspeth had told him, which would be half-truths at best. Xane slapped his hand against a poster they passed, and tore it from the wall. He really was trying hard not to let this devolve into a fight, but connecting his shin with Rock Giant’s nuts was looking increasingly appealing.

‘I say we vote on your girl coming along.’

Xane sucked the ring that pierced the centre of his lower lip, and wished he’d already applied his full mask of stage make-up. The veneer of pan-stick white mixed with blood and kohl made schooling his expressions so much easier. Rather than engage in a pantomime back and forth, he simply shook his head. They weren’t voting. If it came to it, he and Dani could ride on the main bus and anyone who objected to her presence could bunk up with Ash on the sleazemobile – the rust-bucket of a bus that was ostensibly meant to house the road crew but inevitably became Ash’s shagging pad. Somehow, he suspected Dani’s presence wouldn’t be quite so objectionable to them when faced with that prospect.

Honestly, he didn’t know what the hell they could find to object about her anyway. She wasn’t exactly high drama. She was the sort of girl mothers dreamed you’d bring home. Most mothers at any rate; his had never given a shit.

‘She’s coming, and that’s the end of it,’ he muttered. ‘If you don’t like it, take your bass and stuff it up your arse.’ He was getting one thing straight from the outset. He wasn’t going to be walked all over or taken for granted any more. This band was his outfit. He wrote the material, he was the creative force behind it. Every bugger else was replaceable. He expected a little respect.

To his astonishment, Rock Giant clapped him on the back. ‘OK, bring your girl, but try and cut Elspeth some slack, please. She is genuinely a mess right now. Losing Steve’s hit her bloody hard. It’s hit us all hard, I know, but …’ He shook his head. ‘You’ll see.’

Chapter 2

You’re dead to me, Dani, if you go with him. Dead – like your father. Men don’t love. They only think with their dicks. He’s using you. He’ll discard you, just as soon as he’s sucked all the goodness from you.

She made Xane sound like a vampire.

Dani’s finger hovered over the delete button. As mementos went it was a strange one to want to preserve. Then again, it summed up her mother perfectly – batshit crazy, preachy, lacking in genuine understanding or warmth. It also succinctly summarised why Dani was here and not with her mum, locked inside the religious commune that’d been her home since the age of eleven.

Xane might tempt her to sin, but he sure made it a lot of fun, whereas being a good girl the whole time was deadly dull. She didn’t want to turn into the sort of sanctimonious leech her mother and the other women of the Sisterhood of St Agatha’s were. She wanted to live and love, experience what the world had to offer. And yes, it totally did help that the world in this current context happened to possess washboard abs, the voice of Lucifer and waist-length hair the colour of midnight.

Xane Geist could turn her insides mushy with a single glance. He rocked her goddamned world. Hers and a couple of million other folks’ – but she was the only one he was taking on tour.

‘Dani Fosbrook?’

Dani peeped up from her phone screen. The voice didn’t belong to Xane, nor to anyone else she recognised. Although, to be fair, she couldn’t see much of the man’s face, because of the asymmetrical cut of his blond hair. Crew, she gathered, given his Black Halo ‘Requiem for the Damned’ T-shirt and khaki cut-offs stuffed with guitar strings and bits of electrical cable.

‘I’m here to take you backstage.’

Hallelujah! She’d been sitting waiting for someone to fetch her for far too long. It wouldn’t have been such a big deal, but ever since a certain video clip of her and Xane together had gone viral, she’d become an object of curiosity – the rock star’s girlfriend. Hence the queuing fans with their faces pressed to the glass doors.

Unbidden, her escort hefted her suitcase, proving he had muscle hiding beneath that lean physique. She’d squeezed most of her worldly possessions into that bag.

‘Ready?’ He swiped them through a set of security doors.

Dani trotted along behind him. She’d never been more ready in her life, though she was nervous about properly meeting the rest of the band. It didn’t matter how many times Xane told her it’d be all right, she couldn’t entirely quell her butterflies. Black Halo were massive, and she’d been a fan of theirs for eternity. She still regularly pinched herself to check her relationship with Xane was real. Also, she wasn’t sure how much they blamed her for Xane skipping out on them after their last live performance. They might consider her major trouble.

‘First tour with the band?’

She nodded.

‘Mine too. I guess we’ll be seeing a fair bit of one another.’ He pushed back his curtain of long hair, revealing a pair of intriguing mismatched irises, one pale-green and one hazel. Both shone with excitement. ‘I’m Luthor.’

‘Pleased to meet you.’

He gave her an endearing lopsided grin. ‘You’re not what I was expecting.’

‘Meaning?’ she asked, fearing the worst. People didn’t seem to like that she and Xane were together. She still wondered at the miracle of it herself. It didn’t seem to matter how often Xane said he loved her, part of her still expected him to wake one morning and wonder what the fuck he was doing with her – a screwed-up nobody, not especially pretty or clever, and with welts across her soul and body that might never heal.

For the most part, she didn’t even dress like a rock star’s girlfriend. She currently had on a pair of old jeans, a faded long-sleeved T-shirt and only a smidge of make-up.

Luthor shook his head, reinstating the curtain of hair over his eyes. ‘I only meant that I didn’t know he had a steady girlfriend.’

‘Where’ve you been living, Mars?’ She’d have bet money on the whole world having seen that video.

‘Malmö.’

Dani paused a moment to interpret the unfamiliar place-name. ‘Malmö, where is that?’

‘Sweden.’

‘You’re not English?’

He dropped her suitcase in order to release a bellyful of laughter. ‘You needn’t sound so surprised. Not everyone in the world is.’

‘I know, but you don’t have an accent.’

He leaned closer, so his breath stirred the wisps of hair around her face, making them tickle her cheek. ‘Does it make you feel better if I talk like this?’ She could hear it then, the soft inflection on certain words. It sent a tingle down her spine. Damn, he sounded sexy. She could imagine that purr driving a woman wild in bed.

Dani turned away from him, mortified by the heat that a few incongruous words whispered in her ear had generated. She wasn’t a free agent any more to be thinking random wicked thoughts about handsome strange men. She belonged to the sexiest man on the planet. Besides, Xane could do incredible stuff with his voice. He commanded the attention of stadiums full of people. His whispers invoked wild emotions. They could turn hearts inside out and even the tiniest of his growls dampened her and a million other women’s knickers.

She was moist now, merely thinking about him, which just proved that two weeks apart had been too long. They’d been surviving on nightly phone calls and sexting, which didn’t compensate for genuinely being together.

She hadn’t wanted them to be apart, but she’d had to face her mum and put a few things, like her degree, on hold. Taking charge of her life meant cutting a few tethers. On the plus side, she wasn’t beholden to anyone any longer.

‘Aren’t we heading to the dressing rooms?’ she asked, when Luthor turned the opposite way to the one she’d expected.

‘No. The sound booth.’

‘How come?’ Perplexed, she continued to jog along behind, her eye on the way his shorts were clinging to his hips, in danger of sliding down because of the weight of stuff in his pockets.

‘Because Ulf said so, and I do as he says. He’s the guy who hired me. Best damn sound and light engineer in the business.’

She’d never heard of him.

‘He also just happens to be my uncle.’ Luthor held open a door for her to pass through, and they began to climb, up towards the top of the building. ‘My guess is that he wants you out of the way until the soundcheck is done, so that Xane isn’t distracted.’

‘I wouldn’t distract him.’

‘Course not.’ Luthor made an appraising sweep of her body. ‘I bet Xane maintains complete focus when you’re present, just not on the music.’ His gaze lingered on her cleavage.

Dani covered her mouth and coughed, astonished by how blatantly he’d assessed her. Guys didn’t normally hit on her. This was a new thing that had only started happening since Xane took an interest. She guessed they all thought she must have something special hiding beneath her ordinary appearance to have ensnared a man with such a huge sexual appetite, or maybe they thought stealing her away would prove they were shit-hot too.

No man had a chance against Xane.

In retaliation, she shot a glance at Luthor. He had gloriously good arms, and legs that were tanned by the sun and covered with fine golden hairs. Crazy good looks too, if you liked guys who were all light and golden. She guessed she preferred them dark and brooding.

Luthor was fit, but he wasn’t a patch on her man.

‘Where’ve you been?’ grumbled an older man, his long hair and beard threaded with silver, as they entered a glass-fronted room overlooking the stage. They were perched high up in the auditorium, almost on a level with the lighting rig. ‘You walked off with my duct tape. Gimme.’ He snatched the roll of tape that Luthor mined from his pocket and began tearing off strips and fixing assorted cables to the floor. After a moment or two, he turned his webbed face upon her. ‘So you’re the one he ran off with, are you?’

‘Be nice,’ Luthor counselled. ‘She is.’

‘Really? Didn’t think Xane did nice. He normally lands the absolute bitches.’ He thoughtfully rubbed one nicotine-stained finger across his lips before stepping closer, which meant he had to bend his head to look at her, for he was tall, even taller than Luthor, and stocky too, with tattoos that covered his bare arms like sleeves. ‘Are you sure this is the right girl?’

‘I am, yes.’ Dani politely stuck out a hand for him to shake.

Ulf clapped his hand against hers but didn’t shake it. ‘Take a seat. I’ll let you at him once I’m done with him.’

A swivel chair materialised behind her, courtesy of Luthor. Dani gingerly lowered herself into it. She’d got it into her head that the only people she’d have to face in order to join the tour were the members of Black Halo. Somehow she’d overlooked the fact that there was a team of people involved in managing them and delivering their sound to the masses. ‘What are you doing to him?’ Nothing too terrible, she hoped. He’d sounded pretty low when they’d spoken last night. Leastways, he had at the start of their conversation. Not so much by the end, after he’d made her burn with excitement.

‘Hopefully dragging his sorry arse through this set.’ Ulf put on a pair of headphones and turned a nearby microphone towards him. ‘Are you fuckers ready yet?’

She couldn’t hear the response, but Ulf scowled. ‘Nope, we’re apparently having a pissing contest.’ He settled back in his chair with his arms and ankles crossed. ‘This could take a while.’ He checked his watch. ‘You might have to call your lot,’ he said to Luthor after a minute or so of waiting.

His understudy, who had been securing leads to the floor so no one would trip over them, looked up eagerly.

‘You’re shite, but at least you might manage a song or two for the punters. I’m not sure Black Halo are going to have their act together in time.’ Ulf said the last part into the mic.

‘Are they arguing?’ Dani leaned forward in her seat, concerned. If she rose and pressed her face to the glass at the front of the booth, would she be able to see down into the auditorium?

‘Not as such. Mr Geist hasn’t joined us yet. They’ve sent Rock Giant to coax him out from whatever hole he’s wedged himself into.’

‘Ulf!’ Luthor shook his head and nodded towards Dani. ‘Girlfriend, remember.’

‘I didn’t mean that sort of hole. I’m not the one with a filthy mind.’ Clearly bored, Ulf flicked a few switches and checked a few things before settling back into his original pose.

‘So, you’re in a band?’ Dani asked Luthor, disliking the silence that’d crept over them. She felt out of place already, which made her jittery enough, without the added insinuation that Xane was late for the soundcheck because he was making some groupie happy. ‘Is it one of the support acts?’

‘That’s a good un.’ Ulf belched a peal of laughter. He slapped the sound deck, unintentionally knocking several of the sliders, which he then had to reset. ‘What I said earlier was a joke. Perish the thought of his lot walking on stage. It’d be like Eurovision, only a zillion times more excruciating and minus any of the charm.’

Luthor put his head down and kept on at his task, but she could see from the tension in his back that he was hurt by the remark.

‘What are you called?’ she asked, hoping her interest would restore his easy smile.

‘It doesn’t matter. You won’t have heard of us. We’re pretty unknown outside Sweden.’

‘They’re unknown inside Sweden,’ Ulf added, shaking his head. ‘This is why he’s better off here earning some cash and seeing how the pros do it, instead of wasting his time touring a load of fleapits.’

‘It was a good set of venues we had booked.’

‘Dives. You’re too good for them, son. Your lyricist writes dire teenaged drivel. He has no concept of what real agony feels like.’

‘Actually, Lykke’s started writing most of the lyrics now.’

‘Aren’t you being a little harsh?’ Dani remarked, annoyed to see Luthor gritting his teeth. He hung his head forward, so that his long hair masked his expression.

‘Sometimes the truth is harsh,’ Ulf insisted. ‘It hurts to hear it, but we all need someone to be brave enough to tell us when we sound shit. You’ve talent enough to make it big, but not with that outfit. This Fear or whatever it is you’re called.’

‘Denna Rädsla,’ Luthor corrected him.

‘That’s what I said.’

They stared grimly at one another. ‘So, when are you going to tell your precious darlings that they sound shit?’ Luthor asked. ‘Or aren’t you man enough for that?’ He rose to his feet.

‘When it’s the right moment. Which it isn’t yet.’

‘What?’ Dani jumped out of her chair. Her gaze danced expectantly between the two men, seeking clarification. ‘Do you mean Black Halo? They’re not awful.’ A horrid thought struck her. ‘Is something wrong with Xane’s voice? He’s not ill, is he?’ Maybe that’s why they were keeping her away from him.

Ulf sucked his front teeth. ‘He’s fine, or as fine as you’d expect given that the man he was screwing has just died.’

‘I know that, but something prompted that remark.’ She looked to Luthor for an answer, since it had been his comment. She was terrified by the thought that Black Halo might be about to split again.

Luthor flicked a glance at Ulf, who showed no sign of explaining further. ‘They need a live drummer. Using old recordings of Steve Matlock playing doesn’t work. It sounds shit.’

‘But Steve … this is about honouring and remembering him. How can they replace him?’ Not taking on a new drummer was the one thing Xane had said they’d all agreed on.

‘They might not want to, but they need to. Otherwise, they’re going to get the worst slating of their careers from the fans and music press.’

Ulf shook his head. ‘It won’t come to that. Xane will realise it himself as soon as the soundcheck starts. They all will.’

‘But doesn’t the actual gig start in just over two hours?’ Dani shot them both a look of disbelief. Even if, as Ulf claimed, the band realised their mistake, where were they supposed to produce a drummer from at such short notice? Then she looked at Luthor again and everything dropped into place. Ulf hadn’t employed him to crew for the band, he meant him to drum for them. ‘Wow!’ She sank back into her seat. She ought to have twigged that sooner. He had drummer’s arms, after all, though his haircut was more emo than most of the lead guitarists out there. ‘So you’re going to step in and save the day?’

‘Not exactly. I’ll offer my services, yes.’

‘You know that Xane and Steve were really close?’ Far closer than she liked to admit. She’d watched Xane during one outpouring of grief cover the walls of a hotel room in lyrics about the guy. She knew they’d been lovers – a fact that inspired nightmarish fears. Xane was completely at ease with his sexuality, but she was only gradually coming to terms with it. There was a lot of baggage in her past she needed to work through. ‘Actually, I don’t know that Xane’s ready to take on someone new.’ She could only guess about the rest of the band, but presumably Elspeth would throw up objections too.

‘And that is exactly why I haven’t said anything yet.’ Ulf raised his bushy brows and gave her a tight-lipped smile. ‘Give it half an hour. I guarantee, they’ll be begging me to find them a drummer, and, because I’m prepared, I have one all lined up.’

Chapter 3

The sound of Spook’s rhythm parts being played repetitiously greeted Xane as he and Rock Giant entered the auditorium. It served to drag his attention away from the band’s relationship politics and back to where he needed it to be, on the music. They could deal with the travel arrangements later. First they had a soundcheck and the gig to get through, and even though he’d done it a thousand times before, there was still a flutter of self-doubt in his stomach when he first walked onto the stage.

The rest of the band were already positioned on their X-marked spots. Ash joined the sound of his lead guitar to Spook’s as Xane headed to his mic. They were running through the lead and rhythm parts of their newest addition to the set, ‘Taken’, one of the songs Xane had written about Steve. Tonight would be their first live performance of the track, and the plan was to record it, so they needed to nail it or risk delaying the release until they could arrange another live recording or book some studio time.

Having exchanged nods with both guitarists and already bashed heads with bassist Rock Giant, Xane turned his attention to Elspeth. Their relationship remained particularly fraught. Throughout the tour planning, they’d exchanged only basic civilities. However, mindful of Rock Giant’s warning shots in the corridor, Xane battened down his feelings and offered her something like a friendly smile. If this was the price of buying Dani’s place on the tour bus, without a load of aggro, then he guessed he’d do it. ‘How are you doing?’

Seriously not well, if her appearance was anything to go on. Elspeth had always cultivated a wan, faded beauty, but she looked like a glass about to shatter. The change to her hair, while dramatic, certainly hadn’t helped, for it drained her of what little colour she did possess. Once blonde, after the funeral she’d dyed her hair black, complete with a Lily Munster white streak.

Instead of responding to Xane’s gesture, her gaze remained fixed upon the empty space where Steve ought to have been. His drumkit was all set up, but they’d be relying on old recordings rather than a live drummer to make up for his absence. At least, that was supposed to be the plan.

‘What the fuck?’ he growled, noticing the guy behind the drumkit looking perky and ready for action. The nearby microphone unfortunately picked up his voice and amplified it to an ear-splitting level. It got everyone’s attention.

Ash’s footsteps sounded like a stampede as he moved to intercept Xane before he dragged the guy out from behind the drums.

‘Xane. Can we talk?’ Ash wrapped himself like a straitjacket around Xane’s torso.

‘In a minute, when he’s got the fuck away from Steve’s drums.’

‘Now,’ Ash insisted, manhandling him sideways into the wings, away from the microphones. ‘There’s no point in getting all Robocop on his arse, when I’m the one responsible. Yell at me about it.’

‘Get the fuck off me.’ Xane shook off Ash’s hold. ‘What the hell are you playing at? Who is he? Why is he here?’

‘I’m making sure we don’t sound like shit. It’s a lovely idea, Xane, us all pretending Steve’s still here, but you know what? He isn’t, and the backing track seriously doesn’t cut it. We’ll be laughed off if we use it.’

‘If that were the case, Ulf would have said so.’ Their chief sound technician was a straight-talking, gruff old bastard who’d worked with them on their last four tours, and was responsible for such gems of wisdom as ‘You’ll be cutting off your collective bollocks if you sing that soppy crap.’ He never minced words.

‘The crew haven’t said anything because they’re all scared they’re going to end up out of work. When you broke us up a few weeks back, they’re the ones it hit hardest. We all might have money enough to pay the bills, but most of the crew are living from paycheck to paycheck.’

‘That still doesn’t give you the right to employ a drummer. We’re a band. It should have gone to a vote.’

‘True,’ Ash admitted. He released his hold on Xane and pushed his hands into his pockets. ‘But everyone’s so stressed out, I thought I’d cut the preamble. It’s not as if there’s an actual discussion to have. Give it one song and you’ll be agreeing with me. The balance is wrong without live drums, and no, the sound guys can’t fix it, because if they amplify it, the track just ends up drowning out everything else. Xane, those recordings were never intended for this sort of thing. Please. I know why we said we didn’t want to employ anyone, but we have to.’

Xane willed his fists to unclench. He wasn’t so big a dick that he couldn’t comprehend what Ash was saying, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. Even contemplating slotting someone into Steve’s place felt sacrilegious. The truth was, he wanted to see this new drummer off with a sledgehammer, but he also knew he’d ultimately go with what was right for the band.

He folded his arms across his stomach, suddenly overwhelmed by a wave of nausea. Steve’s loss remained an open wound. They might have buried him, but he didn’t know if he’d ever truly manage to lay him to rest.

Where in the hell was Dani? He needed her here.

‘This is for the best, Xane.’ Ash spoke slowly, with as much calm as he could muster. Mediation wasn’t his usual role. Normally it was Spook trying to smooth things out.

‘Who is he?’ Xane asked distrustfully, suspicious of where Ash had magicked someone from, given that decent rock drummers were few and far between. The last thing they needed was a feud developing because they’d poached some other group’s drum fiend. They had enough axes hanging over them as it was.

‘It’s Iain,’ Ash replied, as if that were supposed to mean something.

‘Who?’ He’d met numerous Iains, but none who was particularly known for playing drums.

‘Iain Willows.’

It took a moment for the name to click. ‘Ash, you have to be effing kidding me. Is this a joke?’ It had to be. ‘The guy hates my guts. He’s done nothing but badmouth me for years.’

‘Bit of friendly rivalry, that’s all,’ Ash reassured him. He flicked his swathe of black hair from his eyes. ‘You know how it is. The punters love a good feud. Come on, Xane. We’ve all thrown a few crass remarks about at some point. Besides, he’s a decent drummer, he’s knows our stuff and he’s available for the whole tour. We’re not going to find anyone else of similar calibre that just happens to have a six-month opening on their calendar, starting today.’

Yeah, so how come Mr Willows did?

Xane shook his head. ‘You should have discussed this. Springing him on us like this is wrong.’

‘It’s only what you’re planning to do with Dani. Besides, if I’d brought it up sooner, you’d simply have vetoed the idea, and then where would we be?’

‘What do you mean, this is what I’m doing with Dani? She’s not joining the band.’

‘She’s as good as. However, in the interests of democracy, why don’t we vote on it? Iain, I mean. Not Dani. I’m happy for her to be around if it keeps you sweet. Guys! Over here a minute.’

The rest of the band slowly sloped over, Elspeth and Rock Giant first, then Spook, with his purple Washburn guitar suspended from its strap and his fingers still dancing over the strings in a repetitive cycle.

‘What’s the verdict, then?’ Rock Giant asked. Rather than flick his gaze over to their prospective drummer, he looked up towards the sound booth in the rafters. ‘Are we set for this soundcheck or what? If we don’t get our butts in gear soon, Ulf’s going to go all Captain Caveman on us.’

‘We’re having a vote,’ Ash explained.

Xane rubbed his brow in despair. ‘Ash wants us to take on a new drummer.’

‘Figured. Didn’t think he was sitting there just for show. Does he come with an explanation?’

‘The backing track sucks,’ Ash responded. ‘And even if it didn’t, personally, I don’t want to play exactly the same set every gig for thirty-odd stops. We’ve always swapped things about, it helps keep it fresh.’

‘What’s your opinion, Spook?’ Xane crossed his fingers that Mr Mortensen had more sense than to blindly agree to this.

Spook stopped playing to take a look at the guy behind the drums. ‘I say give him a trial. See how he handles those sticks. If he works out, then sure, fine. If we need somebody, we need somebody.’

‘Elspeth?’ As if he needed to ask to know her opinion. She looked right through him, focusing instead on something in the middle distance, making him wonder how many times she’d wished he’d been the one whose nose had been broken instead of Steve. Still, he’d take that over the withering glare she cast their wannabe drummer.

‘Why are you even asking me? Of course I don’t want him here. We’re doing this tour for Steve. What does it say about his memory if we’ve already replaced him?’

‘That’s not what we’re doing.’ Ash reached out to her, but she backed away like a startled cat. ‘Elspeth, please. I know this is hard. Steve meant a lot to all of us, but we need a new drummer now. We don’t have the luxury to wait. The tour kicks off tonight.’

‘Well, I don’t see what was wrong with what we had planned.’

Ash shoved his hands into his hair despairingly. ‘Open your ears and listen, woman.’

‘Hey, go easy on her,’ Rock Giant warned.

Ash sighed. ‘Elspeth, we’re not replacing Steve. This isn’t about taking on a new permanent member. It’s about getting through the tour.’

‘For God’s sake, just have your vote, Ash,’ Xane said. The sooner this was over with the better.

‘Ayes?’

Ash raised his hand, so too did Rock Giant. Elspeth shook her head violently even before Ash asked for the nays. Making it two for and two against with Xane’s vote. He wasn’t taking on anyone without hearing them play first. That left Spook with the decider.

Spook stood quietly for a moment, with his fingers flat against the strings of his guitar. ‘I don’t want to replace Steve, but there’s no denying that we need a drummer. The mix isn’t right at the moment, which you’re going to realise the minute you start singing,’ he said looking at Xane. ‘Sorry but –’ he hunched his shoulders apologetically ‘– I guess that makes me a yes. Let’s see what he can do, eh?’

‘Two to three carries it,’ Ash called the vote. ‘He’s in for tonight at least. OK, people, let’s get on with this soundcheck.’

‘“Ripped”,’ Xane announced, making an impromptu change to the set. He needed the release he got from belting out the chorus of this song. ‘He’d better be good,’ he mouthed to Ash, who started strumming the intro. ‘And you better not have stolen him from anybody.’

‘Actually, you stole me off him.’

Xane rolled his eyes. He didn’t know what the hell that meant, and wasn’t sure he wanted to.

Chapter 4

No way! He couldn’t fucking well believe it. Luthor kicked the roll of tape he’d been using and sent it slamming into a nearby wall. This could not be happening. He thought the day sucked enough when he’d been sent to collect Xane’s girlfriend and he’d discovered that not only was she hot and cute, she was nice too, which put a massive damper on his plans to seduce the guy again. And now his sticks weren’t going to see any action.

‘Easy, lad,’ Ulf muttered, but that was because he was looking out for his equipment. He didn’t give a fig about Luthor’s dreams being crushed.

‘Just wait, you said,’ Luthor hissed in accusation. ‘They’ll be begging for a drummer. Well, that was shit advice.’ Sitting on their arses meant Black Halo had found someone else.

‘Shouldn’t you tell them that you have an alternative drummer available?’ Dani asked, proving yet again that she was a goddamned saint. ‘It seems only fair. I mean, if there are two contenders, they ought to both be given a chance to try out.’ He wanted to hug her for the suggestion and at the same time curse her for being his rival, though she didn’t realise it.

His uncle scratched his woolly beard. ‘There isn’t time to have two of them battling it out.’

Dani looked as crushed as Luthor did. ‘That’s not fair,’ she blurted.

‘Nothing about this industry is fair.’ Ulf answered her, but he was looking at Luthor. ‘If you think talent is what gets you places, you’re wrong. It’s all about being in the right place and knowing the right people.’

‘I thought I had that bit covered.’ He’d been dreaming of seeing Xane again since the first time they met, but it’d never happened. Then Ulf had suddenly appeared at one of the shitty dives where he and the guys were playing, and proposed something he couldn’t possibly refuse. ‘Come and play for Black Halo.’ That was three weeks ago. He’d spent the whole time practising, learning every song, making his timing perfect, but there’d been no contact with the actual band. Now there wouldn’t be. He’d given up everything for nothing.

‘Knowing Ash trumps knowing me. It’s harsh, but that’s the way it goes.’

Dream over – dismissed with a shrug from Ulf.

He ought to have realised that both drumming for Black Halo and hooking up with Xane again were wild fantasies. If he’d been thinking with his head instead of his dick, maybe he would have, but he’d never been able to forget that night he’d spent with Xane three years back at the Sölvesborg Rock Festival. He’d agreed to Ulf’s proposal as much for the chance of Xane remembering him and wanting a repeat as for a shot at the top. Of course, he’d also imagined Xane still reeling at the loss of his best friend, and him being able to jump in and offer comfort. Nope, that role had already been filled too, and by a real sweetheart. He tried not to wince when she gave him a consoling pat on the shoulder.

‘I’m sorry it didn’t work out, Luthor.’

Yeah, him too.

‘What will you do now?’

‘Get on with the job he has,’ Ulf replied.

Luthor made for the door instead.

‘Don’t you dare walk out!’

He went as far as the stairs, where he stopped in a corner and banged his head against the wall a few times. ‘Damn … fucking … awful … luck.’ The action didn’t improve his mood; it only gave him a bigger sore head. Ulf was right, though: he’d be a fool to walk away now. Being Ulf’s paid understudy was a position many people would kill for. The guy was a technical genius. And who knew what would happen on the road? Six months was a heck of a long time, especially in the lifespan of a top band. Iain Willows might turn out to be a complete dud. Xane might decide Dani was too sweet, or that he needed a boyfriend too. Luthor could live with sharing. He’d been on tour with his band for most of the last three years. He knew all about fluid relationships. Also, he’d lay money on Dani being an inferno between the sheets. She had to be, or how was she holding Xane’s attention? The whole rock circuit knew how much he loved to fuck and how often. No way were they keeping it plain old vanilla. Well, he was more than happy to step in and help spice things up.

Really, almost anything …

This dream couldn’t be over yet.

Chapter 5

Ulf ordered Dani back into her seat when she attempted to run after Luthor. She hated seeing anybody hurt, and wanted to comfort him, but Ulf’s bark was pretty darned bad, and she didn’t want to find out what his bite entailed. On the plus side, he let her listen to the rehearsal. Xane sounded bloody amazing and, she had to admit, she was intrigued by their new drummer and how he might influence the band’s sound.

Surfing the internet on her phone confirmed that he had an impressive rock pedigree. He’d drummed for three big-name bands and had credits on a host of tracks performed with other acts. Luthor’s Denna Rädsla project, on the other hand, only brought up a couple of links, one of them to a scathing review.

‘He’s missing Steve Matlock’s flourishes, but he’s otherwise not bad,’ Ulf confirmed when he was content that everything sounded as it should. ‘You can get out of here now. Leave your case. I’ll see it gets put on the bus. You don’t want to be dragging that around.’

Dani didn’t give him the chance to change his mind: she was out the door and down the stairs, flying towards the dressing rooms. She saw no sign of Luthor. Hopefully, he’d just taken himself off somewhere quiet to calm down and hadn’t genuinely walked out. Though she wouldn’t blame him if he had. If she’d been passed over for a chance of drumming for Black Halo, she’d have been gutted too. Not that she possessed any musical talent.

She found Xane’s dressing room easily enough, knocked and let herself in. Whoa! She crashed headlong into Ash Gore, which startled her into a shriek. He brushed her off, stalked past her and disappeared into another room three doors down.

‘Are you OK?’

She turned her head to find Jan ‘Spook’ Mortensen addressing her.

‘Dani?’ he enquired, hitching a brow. She nodded in confirmation and he stuck out his hand for her to shake. His white-blond hair swept forward over his shoulders and tickled the skin of her arms as he lifted her hand to kiss her knuckles. ‘Nice to meet you again. We seemed to skip introductions last time.’

‘Yeah.’ Her ability to form words dried up. She stared at him as if she had concussion or something.

‘Who are you talking to, Spook? I thought I told you to get out.’

Dani’s grin stretched even wider at the sound of Xane’s voice.

‘I’m just saying hello to your lovely lady.’ Spook leaned forward again and gave her another kiss, this one on the cheek. ‘He’s grouchy and irritable, see if you can cheer him up.’

‘Over what?’

‘Life.’

‘Life?’ she queried, but Spook was already gone.

‘Dani?’ Xane was right there in front of her, wrapping his arms around her, bowing his head and drinking her down like a man desperate for water. ‘It feels like eternity since I last set eyes on you.’ He didn’t seem irritable, only desperately pleased to see her. More pleased than she’d ever imagined he would be. ‘I thought you’d be here before the soundcheck.’

‘I was, but Ulf made me wait with him. He didn’t want me distracting you.’

‘Bastard,’ Xane hissed. ‘I needed distracting.’ His lips found hers again and he drew her tight against his body. He’d already dressed in his stage outfit, so that his dark, ragged shirt was open to the waist, and easy for her to slip her hands inside. All that was missing to transform him into the demon he was on stage was his yellow cat’s-eye contact lenses. Dani was glad they were missing. Without them she could see right into his soul. There was a great gaping hole there caused by Steve Matlock’s death, and he was desperately trying to fill it by clinging to her.

‘So, you have a new drummer,’ she said, hoping it would prompt him to talk. He’d experienced a massive loss. He needed to talk, but every time she tried to prompt him to open up, he sidestepped the subject. The only way he seemed to express his grief was through his lyrics.

A shadow passed across the surface of Xane’s eyes. ‘Apparently.’

‘That must have been a hard decision to make. I know you loved Steve, and –’

He cut her off by covering her mouth with his fingertips. ‘Don’t. I have to go out there and sing. I can’t do that if you make me think about stuff. Yes, we have a new drummer. He’ll do. He’s not my choice.’

Given the mournful look in his eyes, she doubted he’d have chosen anyone.

‘OK,’ she agreed, though it was hard not to try and dig deeper and attempt to console him, when the sadness rolled off him in such tangible waves. ‘Did the others choose him?’

‘Tell me how you are. I’ve been worried sick about you facing those bitches alone. I wish you’d let me come with you.’

If she’d done that, things would very quickly have got out of hand. ‘One of those bitches is my mum. And I needed to do it alone.’ Despite dreaming for years that he’d ride up and rescue her from captivity, she’d realised that the only way to truly be free of her past was to sever the links for herself. The final showdown between her and her mum hadn’t been pretty. And, Lord help her, there’d be no going back. ‘Besides, you had plenty stuff of your own to sort out.’ Such as tour preparations and grieving, and finding a way forward for the band. All those things were more important than having him hold her hand while she dealt with her screwy family.

‘Will they leave you alone?’

She nodded. Rather more permanently alone than she’d really wanted, but her mum wasn’t prepared to see reason. She wasn’t interested in Dani finding happiness, only in keeping her on a very short leash. Dani wasn’t about to discuss it with Xane, but she had about sixty quid in total to her name now. The Sisterhood had reclaimed everything that was officially theirs, which pretty much accounted for everything she owned that wasn’t jammed into the suitcase she’d left with Ulf. ‘Let’s discuss it later, eh? How long until the show starts?’

‘Not long.’

‘Long enough for me to wish you good luck?’ They both needed to push past events aside and to start living in the present again.

Xane eyed her thoughtfully, while he rotated the ring piercing at the centre of his lower lip. ‘What did you have in mind?’ The way his eyes suddenly glittered told her exactly what he was envisaging. In some ways he had the ultimate one-track mind. Her problem was that she couldn’t resist reacting to him. She could never get enough of his hands on her skin, or the feel of his warm body pressed tight to hers, coupled with that was the fact that he was the most beautiful man she’d ever met – all long inky hair, hard body and wicked-as-sin smile. If she stared at him too long, she sometimes forgot to breathe.

She rubbed a hand across the band of scars that girdled her hips, determined to ground herself a little. ‘Good luck.’ She lifted both her brows and shoulders.

‘That’s it?’ Xane quirked one eyebrow. ‘You come dashing into my dressing room right before I go on stage and all I get is two words?’

‘Would you rather I made it three?’

‘Depends on the words.’ He fixed on his prince-of-darkness mask. The one the fans went wild for, the one that made the girlies’ panties wet. It made her pretty giddy too, but then everything about him called to her. She moved closer to him, drawn as though he were magnetically charged, tilted her head up towards him.

‘Is there time?’

‘Always, for this.’ His tongue met hers and slipped teasingly between her lips. It was barely any step at all between that and being so slippery with need that she was grinding her hips against his body in a hungry imitation of coitus. Xane had always been able to unmake her with his kiss. The man had a tongue so wicked he could probably overcome the Queen of Darkness with it … oh, hang on, he had. Elspeth was his ex.

Xane slid one hand down her back and rested it at the base of her spine. Then both his palms skimmed over her bottom. He pulled her closer. ‘When you were late, I started thinking maybe you weren’t coming back. That those dreadful women had got to you and poisoned you against me.’

It still amazed her that he feared she’d leave him. She’d follow him to the ends of the earth and beyond. Dani pushed her hands inside his shirt again, traced the contours of his steely abs, while with her lips she sought his nipples. They were both pierced, though he appeared to have removed one ring.

‘Xane, they couldn’t stop me loving you even before we met, they’ve no chance now.’ Their arguments were stupid and their logic flawed. Besides, even if it all ended tomorrow, it’d still have been worth it for the time they had spent together.

‘We’ve about ten minutes before they’re going to want me backstage.’

‘Yeah?’ Dani teased one of his nipple rings, sucking it into her mouth, so that she left a darker patch on the midnight-blue fabric of his shirt. Xane hissed and arched against her, so that she could feel the growing swell of his erection pressed tight to her pussy. For all the horrors in his life, his ability to get turned on never seemed to diminish.

‘I just want you to know that’s not nearly enough time to do all the things I need to do to you.’ He cupped the side of her breast, rubbed her already tight nipples with the heel of his hand. ‘You’re so mine when this show is over.’

‘I’m already yours.’

Xane kissed the top of each breast then kept on dipping his head lower. His hands led the way, releasing her fly and tugging down her jeans so that they hung around her thighs. ‘It’s been agony without you.’

Oh, hell! He was going to raise her temperature to fever point and she’d end up burning, while he rocked the roof off the goddamned stadium. Still, she didn’t want him to stop. No way.

‘That’s a very pretty pair of panties you have on.’ He curled one finger into them. They were black, with the Black Halo band logo embroidered on the front. Her best friend Ginny had purchased them online and insisted that she wear them, claiming Xane would love them. She didn’t know about love, but he certainly seemed bemused by them. ‘I didn’t think they were on sale yet.’

‘Internet,’ she squeaked, as his kisses edged closer to her pussy. He tickled the curve of her belly, then her inner thigh.

‘I hope these are official and not bootleg.’

‘Do I have to forfeit them if they’re illegal merchandise?’ She tensed, waiting for the first touch of his tongue against her clit, while also wondering if he’d edge down her knickers, or suckle her through the cotton. Knowing Xane, he might simply rip them right off.

‘They’re coming off anyway.’ He lowered them just far enough to expose her already pink and begging clit.

Xane’s tongue made contact, sending a supercharge of energy hurtling along her synapses. Her legs almost buckled beneath her. Dani clasped hold of his head and clung on for dear life, her fingers woven into the black strands of his hair.

Every one of Xane’s kisses melted her, no matter which part of her body he touched, but when he kissed her here, in this most private place, she struggled to maintain her calm. He made it virtually impossible not to thrash and scream from the pure, raw pleasure he fed her.

‘Need you to come for me, Dani. I want to go out there with your taste still on my tongue. I want to howl at that crowd, welcome them to the show with your scent on my skin.’

Just the thought of that … oh, boy, it undid her. ‘Fingers – I need your fingers,’ she insisted.

‘Like this?’ He slid two inside her, used them to fuck her, while he rolled the soft pad of his thumb against the base of her clit. Perfect. Absolutely perfect.

Someone hammered on the outside of the door that she hadn’t realised he’d pinned her against. ‘Xane, two minutes.’

Dani shook as the pressure built inside her. Bright pinpricks of light flashed across the insides of her eyelids as she squeezed her eyes closed. ‘Oh, God! I don’t think I can …’ Not while she knew there were people outside waiting for them.

‘Just relax, let it happen. There, isn’t it?’ he asked, adjusting the way he had his fingers curled, so that they nudged repeatedly against some incredibly sensitive spot inside her pussy. Immediately, it sent her whole nervous system into raptures. ‘There it is. There.’ She came hard against his beautiful mouth.

‘Oh, God,’ she sighed again, when, not content with one explosion, he pushed her headlong towards another. The second wasn’t any less quiet. Only the door behind her and Xane’s firm grip upon her legs kept her upright. He reached up and offered her his fingers to bite down on. ‘That’s it. Ride it, Dani. I can feel you tugging me deeper. I want to get inside you so badly.’

‘Now, Xane.’ A second person, one with seemingly far less patience, rattled the door handle.

Xane brushed a hand across his fly, squeezed, but there was no time for anything else. Still, he held her until the tremors faded from her limbs. Only when she’d fully regained her composure did he lift her panties back into place and refasten her jeans. He didn’t wipe his fingers or his mouth, just smeared on a demonic pout. ‘Every time I lift the microphone, I’m going to get a hit of you, and I’ll remember you’re waiting for me. That’s going to get me through this.’

For the briefest moment, she saw a flash of the torment waging in his soul. Then he grabbed her hand and opened the door. Rock Giant stood on the opposite side, his knuckles raised ready to hammer on the wood.

‘For fuck’s sake, how many calls do you need?’ He scowled at Dani. Xane squeezed her hand, reminding her that he was there, and she was his. She didn’t need to feel intimidated, even if Black Halo’s bass guitarist did stand well over six feet, and the spikes in his hair probably added another ten inches. ‘Put the girl down. We’re up.’

Chapter 6

Xane was definitely up. Dani couldn’t divert her gaze from his loins and the evidence of that fact, all the way from his dressing-room door to the green room. Surely he couldn’t walk on stage like that? He’d get done for obscenity or something.

‘Are you really going to walk out there hard?’ She reached across and gave his cock a little squeeze.

Xane repressed a groan, but a flash of excitement shot from the centres of his eyes. ‘It won’t be the first time.’

‘Someone else got you this excited?’

He fell quiet and got a strange faraway look in his eyes. Damn, she ought to have realised. Only one person made his vision cloud like that. Dani moved her hand and squeezed his fingers instead. She didn’t want him choked up on memories. Nor did she want the reminder of his fluid sexuality. She thought she probably ought to say or do something, but they had reached the backstage area and all of a sudden there were too many people around for them to discuss anything so private.

Her worries about Xane quickly passed as they were thrown in the whirl of activity. Dani realised it was the first time she’d seen the whole band together in one place. Her inner fan-girl took over, so she was sporting a stupid grin she couldn’t dislodge. Spook and Ash were chatting to a couple of the road crew. Elspeth Shriik was sipping water through a straw while glaring with undisguised hatred at Iain Willows, who wasn’t at all what Dani had expected.

In her mind’s eye she’d dressed him in tight black leathers, with one of those strange bolero-type jackets that covered the arms and fastened above the abs but left the whole chest on display. She’d envisaged him being kind of hot, but borderline sleazy too. Only he wasn’t that. He wasn’t really very Black Halo-ish either. He looked more pop than rock with his razor-cut hair and his thick beetling eyebrows, as if he’d come straight from entertaining the tweenage crowd. No wonder Xane had his doubts. Luthor would definitely have been a more obvious fit. She wondered if he’d returned to the sound booth to help Ulf or if he’d actually walked out.

One of the crew fitted Xane with an earpiece, while another supplied him with a banana. ‘Pre-gig ritual,’ he explained, in response to her curious stare. ‘It’s hard work out there. This stops me coming off stage completely bushed.’

‘You’d better eat a few of them, then,’ she advised, snatching a second banana from the same crew member, and peeling it ready for Xane to eat. ‘I’m going to want you wide awake, not sleepy.’

‘I don’t think that’ll be a problem.’ Still, he took her offering, and devoured it in four bites.

‘Don’t any of the others partake?’

‘They’ve quirks of their own.’ He drew her attention to them in turn. ‘Spook mutters some ancient Swedish ode, and he doesn’t need bananas. He practically lives on guarana and goji berries. Elspeth,’ he said without looking at his former lover, ‘spritzes herself with exactly five squirts of Midnight Poison, but not until the very last second. Rock Giant burns a few new holes in the ozone layer making sure those spikes of his stay in place.’

‘And Ash?’

‘He’ll have spent the last hour sucking aniseed balls, so he tastes like he’s been necking Pernod.’

She didn’t enquire how he knew what Ash tasted like, already knowing she wouldn’t like the answer. However, the damage was already done, and her overactive imagination had produced a crystal-clear image of Xane and Ash kissing. It was hard enough dealing with the fact that Xane had been in love with Steve Matlock, let alone speculating on what relationships he’d had and what things he’d done with the rest of the band. It wouldn’t surprise her to learn that he’d slept with every goddamned one of them. She didn’t need confirmation of that fact, though. It might not surprise her, but it did make her hideously queasy.

‘Ash also likes to line up his post-show entertainment.’ He nodded his head towards a huddle of girls waiting in the corner. To Dani’s astonishment, her best friend Ginny was among them.

‘What – how are you here? Why are you here?’

‘Same as you. I’m scoring myself a red-hot rock star.’ She winked at Xane, who turned away. ‘I got myself a legit pass this time.’ It read, ‘Property of Ash Gore’.

‘We’ll speak in a bit,’ Dani said, before scuttling off to catch up with Xane, whose attention had turned to the new guy. She hoped Ginny knew what she was doing, and wasn’t going to get herself hurt. Ash wasn’t like Xane. He didn’t get emotionally invested.

‘I hope you’re not drinking too much of that shit.’

Dani jumped in response to Xane’s growl. It wasn’t directed at her but at Iain Willows, who was busy necking a very large and lethal-looking cocktail.

Showing impressive guts, Iain locked gazes with Xane. ‘Is there a problem with me having a drink?’

‘No. No problem.’ Ash darted between them, his palms raised towards Xane. ‘It’s just one drink, Xane. It’s not a problem.’

‘If he’s playing for us, I want him sober.’

‘He’s not going to get wasted on one drink. It’s not like he’s downed a dozen pints.’

‘It’s OK, Ash.’ Iain pushed Ash to one side so he could address Xane directly. ‘I get this is difficult for you. Steve was a fantastic drummer, I know I’m going to have a hell of a time trying to replace him, but –’

‘You’ll never replace him.’ Xane turned his back and stalked away.

Dani lingered a moment, staggered by Xane’s bluntness.

‘He’s still in shock,’ she muttered by way of an explanation. ‘He doesn’t find it easy to talk about Steve.’

Ash nodded in agreement with her. He clapped Iain on the back. ‘Give him time. It’s only been a few weeks.’

‘Maybe you’re not ready to be on tour.’

‘But we are. It’ll be fine. It’s only the first night. Once we’re through this, things will settle down.’

Dani hoped Ash was right, but at the moment she wasn’t even sure how Xane was going to manage to sing. ‘How do you and Ash know one another?’ she asked Iain.

‘We were in a band together once. Sorry, who are you?’

‘She’s Xane’s girlfriend,’ Ash said.

‘Oh, right! It was back in college. Do you ever see any of those guys any more?’

‘No.’

‘Remember Tom? I wonder if he still has a games controller welded to his hand.’

‘Probably. Shouldn’t you catch up with Xane?’ Ash nudged her in the direction of her lover. Dani caught up with Xane as he was slipping his yellow contact lenses in. He blinked to make sure they were sitting right. It shocked her just how much they altered his visage. Gone were the shadows and pain she knew he had locked up inside, replaced by a vision of ghoulish decadence.

‘What?’ he asked, curling his lip in response to her stare.

‘Are you all right?’

‘Yeah.’

‘It’s just you were –’ She didn’t want to say rude, even though that’s exactly what he’d been. ‘It’s not his fault. He’s helping you out, Xane.’

‘Yeah, ’cause stepping in to drum for Black Halo is a real hardship. He’s not helping us. He’s helping himself.’

‘Must you be quite so cynical?’

‘Yes, actually.’ He sneered, in a way that probably shouldn’t have wet her panties but did.

‘Xane.’

‘What?’

She stretched on tiptoes to steal a kiss.

‘Um,’ he responded, not pushing her away.

‘Are you always this tense right before you go on?’

‘Sometimes. Not always. It’s odd going out there without him. We’ve always done this together, and now I have to introduce him.’ He inclined his head towards Iain without looking at him. ‘Like I want to go out and say, this is our farewell to Steve and, by the way, here’s his substitute.’

‘Then don’t introduce him. Just play.’

He smiled. ‘And you think I’m rude.’ He shook his head, but kept on grinning. ‘Come here. I need another one of these.’ He demanded another kiss, and another, like he hoped to find strength inside her. Rock Giant walked past and made a loud puking noise. Xane responded by sticking a finger up at him. He didn’t release her, though, not until Ash tapped him on the shoulder.

‘Time’s up, mate. You need to put the nice lady down now.’ He grasped hold of Xane’s upper arm and used the hold to turn him away from Dani and towards the stage. ‘We just need to borrow him for a bit. I swear I’ll bring him back.’

‘Stay right there,’ Xane insisted. ‘The moment I get off …’

‘You’ll what? Get her off?’ Ash interrupted. He gave her a cheeky grin. ‘We’re having a live sex show as an encore. You never said that. If I’d known, I’d have put it on the advertising.’

Xane slapped him round the head, but Dani was grateful to him for lightening the mood.

‘Save it for later, boys.’ Spook glided past them, his guitar already in his hands. ‘You can do all the manly wrestling you like post-show.’

‘I’d rather wrestle with his special friend.’ Ash grabbed Dani’s hand and twirled her round.

Xane dragged him off her. ‘Get your own special friend.’

Ash pouted. ‘But Xane, all my friends are special.’ He waved at the girls waiting patiently in the corner. ‘Since you’re bringing Dani, can I bring them along?’

Xane shoved him up onto the stage.

‘Good luck,’ Dani called after them. She went and joined Ash’s fan club, who had a prime spot at the front of the stage. She was still surprised by Ginny’s presence among them. ‘Why are you here?’ she asked again.

‘To save you the best spot in the house.’ She dragged Dani to the front, right up against the barrier. ‘And Ash is hot. I fancied another helping. You can’t blame me for wanting a little of what you have with Xane.’

‘I don’t, but … Ginny, he’s not like Xane. He’s –’

‘Thank God. You can keep mister tall, dark and brooding. I’ll have mister –’

‘– slightly less tall and brooding,’ Dani suggested.

Ginny conceded the point with a grin. ‘Yeah, I guess.’ She linked their arms. ‘This is going to be epic. Are you ready to scream yourself hoarse?’

Dani nodded, because the band had exploded into sound and there was no way Ginny would possibly hear her reply. She had to wonder at her friend’s behaviour, though. Since when was standing in the crowd or singing herself hoarse Ginny’s idea of fun? The last time they’d come to see Black Halo, Ginny hadn’t been remotely interested in seeing them play, only on scoring herself a good time. Evidently the night she’d spent with Ash, Spook and Rock Giant had changed her mind about that. She was now yelling like she was their number-one fan.

Chapter 7

The crowd were fucking wild, baying and whooping and slamming their bodies against the barriers that lined the front of the stage. After the post-show mayhem following their last show, security weren’t up for taking risks. There was a row of hulking brutes between Xane and his audience. It didn’t matter. He blanked out everything else, the uneasy truce that had brought him here, the imposter on his stage, the six-foot incision in his chest, and immersed himself in the music and the limelight. He dragged up lyrics and raw emotions from the darkest reaches of his soul, and then spat them at the audience – who lapped them up and worshipped him, singing, screaming along with him to the songs they knew, and communicating through the rhythm of their bodies their appreciation of the new material.

For a short time, the rapture they shared made him feel whole again. Gone were the feelings of resentment, gone his anxieties. The mechanics of the band hardly seemed to matter, as long as the music continued to come from the heart and maintained its poetic beauty.

The crowd worshipped him and they went crazy over Spook and Ash back to back, fingers working lightning-fast as their guitars duelled and Rock Giant maintained the thumping bass.

He didn’t try to blank out Steve. He let his loss show as he sang his farewell to him, and if a stray tear fell, then it was no bad thing. It didn’t make him soft. It simply expressed the extent of his grief. He knew the crowd understood, that they were shocked and traumatised by Steve’s loss too.

Xane finished off the evening with a torch song, guaranteed to pierce the hearts of the audience. It was an old favourite, from Black Halo’s first album, before they’d gone multi-platinum. In fact, this song had been the one to jet them into the stratosphere. ‘Torn Into’ struck a chord with people in a big way. The crowd crooned along with him.

Sadly, gone were the days of them holding their lighters aloft as they sang. Instead, he faced a sea of lit mobile-phone faces. It wasn’t quite the same, but probably resulted in fewer burned fingers.

Time sped up while he was out there. They said their farewells. Then came back and played a bitching version of ‘Perverted Wraiths’ as an encore, the driving beat leaving their audience adrenalin-crazed and punch-drunk. Xane took his bow as the lights faded away, feeling high and more at ease than he had in months.

Backstage hummed with activity; he could feel the buzz straightaway. The crew were all on a high, grinning as they went about their jobs. There wasn’t much time to party. The plan was to pack up and hit the road tonight, so they could settle into the new venue tomorrow without too much sweat. The first few days of a tour were always a bit chaotic, until everyone got into a routine.

‘I see someone let the vultures in.’ Spook knocked knuckles with him as they joined the crowd in the green room.

Xane’s money was on it having been their manager, because of the high proportion of media types to pretty girls seeking favours.

Spook handed his guitar over to a waiting member of the crew. ‘What do you reckon, leg it straight for the dressing rooms and hope they’ve got bored and naffed off by the time we come out?’

‘Much as I applaud the dressing-room plan, I need to find Dani first.’

‘Six o’clock,’ Spook said, nodding toward the backstage bar. ‘Do you see her?’

The only person Xane could see was Rock Giant, who was something of a landmark. ‘No. Where?’

‘Wedged between Ash and the wall.’

‘Where?’ Xane wasn’t normally possessive, but he knew what a snake Ash could be when it came to getting his leg over. He wouldn’t think twice about bedding Dani, or any other girl Xane happened to show an interest in. Matter of fact, in the past he’d made a point of seducing the girls the other guys hooked up with. It seemed to be a machismo thing with him, proving he was the hottest lover or something. He was also the biggest dick, much as Xane loved him. The only reason none of them had ever called Ash out over his practices was that none of them had ever been serious about a relationship before. Except for his former relationship with Elspeth and Steve. That was different. They’d all been part of the band, and Ash had never had a look-in there.

‘Don’t tear his head off,’ Spook pleaded. ‘I don’t want to have to shop for a lead guitarist too.’

Xane ripped a pathway through the crowd. He trusted Dani. He placed no blame on her; she was innocent to Ash’s ways. She was probably just hanging with her friend waiting for him when Ash and his trouser snake had pounced.

His annoyance spiked as he drew closer and realised that Iain Willows was in on the act of fucking with his girl too. He and Ash had Dani trapped between them, like the filling in some hideous sandwich. ‘Lay off her,’ he snarled, grabbing hold of Ash’s shoulder and hauling him backwards.

‘Watch it.’ Ash shrugged him off, shaking his head. ‘You’ve met Ginny, right?’

Yes. Yes, he had. The tension flowed from his limbs, as he realised the girl he’d taken to be Dani was in fact her friend and housemate.

‘Well, hello, He-Man,’ she drawled. A vamp’s smile stretched wide across her impish face. She gave him a thorough once-over, obviously enjoying what she saw. ‘What can I do for you?’

‘Where’s Dani?’ he demanded.

‘Is that all?’ she purred, her eyes showing her disappointment. She reached out to stroke the line of his lapel. ‘I thought, seeing how eager you were to speak, that maybe you required my urgent attention with something.’

‘Yes, tell me where my girlfriend is.’

‘The little girls’ room,’ Ash replied. He reasserted his claim on Ginny by encircling her waist with one arm.

‘Right. Thanks.’ That was all he needed to know. Xane backed away immediately and searched over the heads of the crowd for a signpost to the ladies’ bathroom.

‘Seriously, he’s going to wait outside the door?’ he heard Iain remark. ‘That is so uncool.’

Xane zapped him with his laser-beam stare. God, he resented having to have this guy around.

‘Odds are he’s planning on walking straight in,’ Ash replied, at which point Xane rewrote his strategy. Dani deserved better than to be groped in a venue toilet.

‘You know, it wouldn’t kill you to hang with us for a few minutes before you go tearing off,’ Rock Giant remarked, joining them. He had Elspeth tucked against him as if she required his support to stay upright.

‘I’m going to be squashed on to a bus with you lot for the next six months. Excuse me if I enjoy a little separation while I can.’

‘Xane, I want you to meet …’ Graham Callahan, Black Halo’s manager, stepped into Xane’s path. ‘This is Jenna from Rock Out Monthly.’

‘Not now, Graham.’

‘I was just hoping I could ask you a few questions, Mr Geist,’ the woman insisted, holding a dictaphone up towards him. ‘We’re all shocked and saddened by the loss of Steve Matlock. How easy was it for you all to replace him? I understand you and he were particularly close.’

‘Not now.’ He shot Graham a particularly evil look. He was not spilling his heart to some rag that probably wasn’t even interested in the band’s music. ‘Where’s Sally?’ he demanded. ‘I need the bus keys.’

Spook co-opted the journalist, winning her over with a smile and a suggestion that they find a quiet corner.

‘She’s in the office,’ Graham responded, which Xane took to mean the motorhome that Sally and Graham used as a temporary HQ while the band was on tour.

Good. It’d be parked next to the bus.

‘Xane.’ He hadn’t reached the bathroom before Dani found him. ‘You were awesome!’ She smacked a kiss against his lips. ‘You made me sob when you sang “Torn Into”.’ She fluttered her hand, tearing up again at the memory. There were still mascara smudges on her cheeks as proof.

Xane reached out to rub at them, only for a brilliant smile to burst from her.

‘And “The Garden of Lost Time” and “Hellhole” – God, you got me so horny, and then when Ash and Spook were duelling. I never knew they did that. I mean there’s a bit of it on the albums, but it doesn’t have the same oomph as when you’re seeing and hearing it live. It was so good. What? Why are you grinning at me like that?’

‘Because you’re awesome,’ he said, lifting her into his arms. She hugged him back, not seeming to mind that he was hot and sweaty and covered in stage paint and fake blood splatter.

‘I’m not awesome,’ she protested, wriggling in his arms. ‘You’re the one who’s amazing. I can’t believe I never came to see you live before. I mean, I did that last time you were supposed to play, but I should have done it before then. I’ve been missing out on so damn much.’ She smacked another scorching hot kiss against his lips. ‘You completely rocked my socks off.’

‘What do you say we sneak away and I rock your panties off?’

‘I say,’ she said, tucking his hair behind his ear so that she could whisper into it, ‘that you’re on.’

Chapter 8

Dani clung tightly to Xane’s hand as they sneaked out back to find Sally. She’d never been on a tour bus before, and was itching to see it almost as much as she was itching to push Xane up against a wall and run her hands all over his body.

It was dark in the lot out back, with only one or two dim lights rather than the floodlighting she’d expected. Sally insisted on unlocking for them, rather than simply handing over the keys. ‘It’s a new bus,’ she explained, which caused Xane to stop in his tracks.

‘Since when?’

‘You’re gonna love it, Xane. It makes the last one look like the rust-bucket.’

From what Xane had described, the last bus had been fairly comfortable, whereas the rust-bucket was the heap of shit that the crew used, normally accompanied by Ash and a collection of stray women.

‘Custom paint job.’ She held her hands out to present them the vehicle. It was huge, two storeys like a red London bus, but silver and black and with tinted windows. Black Halo’s distinctive logo graced the backend.

‘Oh, no,’ Xane said, evidently realising at the same time Dani did that there was only one bus parked up, not the two there ought to have been. ‘Where’s the rust-bucket?’

‘Scrapyard,’ Sally remarked blithely. ‘We didn’t need it any more. Wait until you see inside this beast. It has everything, air-con, state-of-the-art kitchen, on-board recording studio.’ She unlocked the door and ushered them up the steps. ‘This baby’s better kitted out than my house.’

‘It looks amazing,’ Dani agreed. The steps led up past the driver’s seat into a smart kitchen-dining area, finished in black and brushed steel to match the band’s image.

‘There’s a small sitting area beyond and two berths down here, with a loo, shower and double bedroom at the back. Then upstairs you have the studio, six bunks and another sitting area that converts into a spare double.’

‘Are there that many people you need beds for?’ Dani asked. She guessed that maybe there were if the crew and band were sharing lodgings. It looked pretty spacious at the moment, but once there were a few decent-sized blokes on board, the space was going to shrink fast.

‘This isn’t going to work, Sally. We have two buses for a reason,’ Xane said.

‘Which is?’

‘Ash.’

‘Mm hm … yeah. The thing is, there are a lot of dates on this tour, and there’s a lot of travelling involved. It makes no sense to be constantly waiting around for a bus that breaks down. Also, this way, you’re all in the same place. There’s no risk of losing anyone. If you need time out from each other, then you can ride with me and Graham in the motorhome or in the new equipment truck with Ulf.’

‘You replaced that too?’

‘Yeah, there was a fuck-off big scrape down the side of it. It looked as if it’d been side-swiped by Godzilla.’

‘Where’s Ash gonna …’

Sally patted him on the back. ‘I’m sure you’ll sort it out. You know, in the early days you always holed up on one bus, and there were never any issues.’

‘In those days Ash didn’t travel with an entourage.’

‘No,’ she said. ‘You did. Get used to it, Xane. This is how it is. I’m sure you can come to an agreement with Ash, you’re both adults. Talk to one another and settle it. Now, I’ll leave you and Dani to get comfortable.’ She waved them a cheery farewell.

‘Shit!’ Xane bellowed the moment Sally closed the outer door. He punched one of the cupboard doors, introducing a small dent.

‘How bad can it be?’ Dani rubbed his arm soothingly. ‘It’ll be a bit cramped when everyone’s together, but we’ll cope. I bet there’s not many times when everyone is in the same place.’

‘It’s not the number of people that’s the issue. I don’t want to listen to Ash fucking groupies every night. You’ve no idea what it’s like. It’s so-o not pretty when he turfs them out afterwards.’ He gave her a hard and very serious look. ‘I trust your friend Ginny realises there’s nothing more than a good time on offer.’

‘She does.’

‘Good. I wish the rest of his hook-ups were that bright. Most of them are convinced they’re the one, and he’s going to magically settle down and have babies.’

‘I can’t see Ash with a baby.’ She squinted, trying to picture him bare-chested with a newborn tucked against his body instead of his guitar. It didn’t work. ‘Maybe he can be persuaded to party elsewhere.’

‘What – like throw him a mattress in the back of the equipment van and let him hang out there?’

‘Harsh.’

‘Yeah, but if they see where he’s planning on banging them maybe they won’t get so fanciful in their ideas.’

‘Can I get fanciful?’ she asked, sliding her arms around his waist. The bonus of him thinking about Ash was that he wasn’t thinking about Steve, which in turn ought to make it easier for her to get him to focus on her.

‘You don’t need to get fanciful, I’m yours already.’

She’d never get tired of hearing him say it, even if it wasn’t entirely true. ‘Can we explore?’ She’d never got to do any normal childhood things like staying in a holiday home. ‘I want to choose a bed.’

Xane gave her a gentle push towards the stairs. ‘Let’s go.’

‘Can’t we nab the double?’

He shook his head. ‘The double’s normally assigned on a rota, but I suspect Elspeth’s going to lay claim to it, and frankly I don’t feel like arguing. If she’s got a room to hide in that I don’t have to go near, then all the better.’

To be fair, Dani couldn’t argue with that logic either. She didn’t particularly relish the thought of spending six months cooped up with his ex-girlfriend any more than he did. ‘OK, so if Elspeth has the bedroom, won’t that make it difficult for Ash to entertain anyway? I mean, he can hardly have an orgy in a bunk bed.’

‘Knowing Ash he’d use someone else’s bed.’

She frowned and wondered again if Ginny really did know what she was getting herself into. Xane made him sound like a diabolical slut. She prayed, for Ginny’s sake, he was exaggerating.

The sleeping quarters occupied the middle section of the upper floor. ‘Top or bottom?’ Dani asked. There were three bunks on each side.

Xane immediately vaulted up onto the middle bunk on the righthand side. ‘Neither.’ He turned onto his back and wriggled a little to test out the mattress. ‘Not bad. Not bad at all. Come on up.’

She ought to have known he’d opt for the middle. After all, he’d spent numerous nights in the centre of a three-way. She shoved the thought of him sandwiched between Elspeth and Steve to the back of her head. It was only her guess that they’d engaged in that sort of sex anyway. Xane had never explicitly said that the three of them had shared a bed at the same time.

Xane rolled onto his side to look at her. ‘Which one do you want?’

All the bunks were identically made up with the same smart black and white coverings, so the only actual difference was the positioning. ‘This one.’ She opted for the bunk directly below Xane’s. Kneeling to crawl into bed seemed less hassle than having to scurry up and down a ladder. She didn’t possess Xane’s height or agility to be able to easily hop up into even the middle bunk.

Dani crawled into her new home and stretched out, getting herself acquainted with the space. A shelf ran along the entire length of the back wall. She also had her own TV/DVD combo set into the wall at her feet, and there seemed to be a multitude of odd little cubbyholes too.

A line of switches sat directly above her head. Dani tested one at random and the lights dimmed. The second closed the curtains, concealing her from the rest of the room.

Xane stuck his head under the curtains. ‘I hope you’re not intentionally shutting me out.’ He crawled in beside her and stretched out on his side.

‘Just testing things out.’ She flicked a few more switches on and off.

‘There wasn’t any of this stuff on the old bus. I guess it’s a welcome improvement, even if we do have to share with Ash. These bunks are easily a foot and a half wider than the old ones. Want to know how I can tell?’ He kissed his index finger and pressed it to the tip of her nose. ‘Because we’re not squashed together like sardines. In the past, we’d have had to be like this if we’d wanted to lie down together.’ He rolled on top of her, with his knees tucked tight against her sides and his body hunched low as though there were no headspace at all above him.

‘Cosy,’ she said, putting her arms around him too. ‘I might be mistaken, but I seem to recall you saying something about my knickers coming off.’

Xane lifted himself on his elbows a little so that they weren’t pressed quite so tightly together. ‘I did, didn’t I.’

‘You did.’

‘Did I cite a reason?’ he teased.

As if he didn’t know. ‘I think you were planning a bit of a workout.’

‘I think I’d need gym clothes for that, wouldn’t I? Not your panties.’

Dani slapped him on the shoulder. ‘Stop it.’

‘Don’t you like my teasing?’ He arched his body at that exact moment so that the swell of his erection pressed tight against the apex of her thighs.

‘Mm,’ she groaned.

‘Is this the “mmm” bit?’ He rolled his hips again, thus teasing her in exactly the right spot. ‘I’ve really fucking missed you, have I mentioned that yet? I wanted your arms around me so much.’ He explored the side of her jaw, nipped her earlobe, then trailed kisses down to the pulse point in her throat.

‘I’m here now, and I’m not going anywhere.’ She sought a route inside his shirt, clawed at the skin of his back until he growled and pulled away.

Xane breathed out jerkily. His hot hands slid down to her waist, and a second later he had her jeans around her knees. ‘I do like these knickers,’ he said, twanging the side elastic of her bit of Black Halo merchandise. ‘Although I like them down here best, where they can be all pretty but not get in the way.’ They followed her jeans down to her knees.

It wasn’t so long ago Dani had balked at the mere thought of being this exposed, but when Xane crouched over her, looking at her, she knew he wasn’t seeing her hundreds of scars, only the prize awaiting him between her thighs.

‘You smell so sweet.’ He stuck out his tongue, and her body wept in anticipation. He didn’t make her wait too long. His tongue tickled her navel first, before delving lower. He licked along the split of her lips, teasing, tantalising her with the promise of more, so that she arched off the bed towards him, offering herself up.

When his tongue finally touched her clit, the jolt zapped through her like ten thousand volts. She clawed the bedclothes.

‘This bit?’ he enquired. ‘This spot here? Buck for me some more.’

She did, her muscles jumping without conscious input on her part. Wild fire raged inside her whenever he touched her with his mouth.

‘What exactly is it that gets you so twitchy?’

‘Do that again?’

He licked her clit again, using his tongue stud against the underside.

Hell, yeah! That turned her to mush every time. It damn near short-circuited her brain. If tongue studs became standard and more guys were prepared to do this, the world would become a happier place overnight.

‘What about if I tickle this bit too?’ he said, briefly touching her rear entrance.

Oh, God, no. She couldn’t take it. It was too sensitive and too naughty. But then Xane did love being rude. He liked pushing boundaries, doing things in places he shouldn’t. He’d proved several times over how much fun doing those things could be too.

The thought of him sliding into her rear, pounding her hard that way, made her gasp. If the rest of the band turned up while he was doing that, it’d be totally embarrassing. Not that she wouldn’t die anyway if they arrived now, while she had her panties round her knees.

‘Like that thought, don’t you?’ Xane’s breath whispered against her skin. ‘I know you do. You like to pretend you’re all prim, but I know the real you. I know you like it when I put my dirty fingers in dirty places.’

‘Yes,’ she breathlessly agreed. There didn’t seem to be any sense in denying it. Not when she was already reacting to him stroking her there. He tantalised her with the press of one fingertip, pushing it in enough to light up her nerve-endings and make her feel ridiculously naughty. She knew he liked sex that way. She guessed that’s how he’d done things when he was with Steve.

Fuck! She had Steve Matlock in her head again. She wasn’t going there. She wasn’t. Not when Xane was coaxing this much pleasure from her body. It didn’t matter what he’d done in the past, or who he’d loved. He was with her now.

‘I’m thinking I’m going to need to get inside you real soon.’

He rose over her, and began a seductive climb up her torso, marking his ascent with kisses. When he reached the hem of her top, he shoved it up over her breasts, exposing her from her bra to her knees. ‘You are so fucking sexy,’ he growled, his voice a low hum in his throat. ‘Matching bra too,’ he observed before he unclasped it and sent it flying over his shoulder, before latching onto one of her puckered nipples.

Dani reached for him too. She managed to wrestle his shirt from him before he grabbed hold of her wrists and pinned them above her head.

‘Sorry, I can’t have you touching me.’ He rolled his hips as he spoke, driving his leather-clad loins against her pussy. ‘I want to enjoy this. Make it last. But you have me so stoked already with all those little crooning noises you’re making that I’m not sure I’ll last longer than a nanosecond with your hands on me.’

‘But I want to touch you.’ She liked running her hands across his body, every bit of it, though there were a few special places she was particularly excited by, like the indents that ran down from his hips to form a V shape, and the prize that led to. She liked the flat of his stomach too, and his collarbone, and tiny perky nipples. Normally, they were adorned by silver ring piercings, but tonight the left one was missing. A new band of ink decorated a spot over his heart. Closer observation revealed it to be their names entwined within the body of a serpent biting its own tail.

He’d permanently inked her name on himself. There were no tattoos on him that read ‘Elspeth’ or ‘Steve’. Maybe he genuinely was as serious about her as she was about him.

He cried out as she sucked one of his nipples into her mouth. ‘Off. I’m serious, Dani. Don’t. I will boil over.’

‘I can’t believe my body makes you that hot.’

‘All of you makes me hot. Now, back off and stop fighting me. Let me control this.’

‘Am I fighting?’ She tested his hold upon her wrists again. She liked it when he held her down, but she liked being free to touch him and rake her nails across his back too.

‘Seriously, woman. You can have your turn soon, but you need to keep your hands off me, or else me and my hard-on are going to have to take a little trip to the bathroom.’

‘How’s that going to help?’ She pictured him standing under the bright fluorescent light, his erection hugging tight against his body.

‘You’d be amazed what a bit of icy water can do.’

She didn’t want him to cool off. ‘Wouldn’t you rather slip it someplace warm?’ She lifted her hips to collide with his. He hadn’t forbidden her that, or her giving him kisses.

He made a shocked sound, and his eyelids closed.

Xane shook himself, but not before Dani had used his moment of distraction to free her hands and unfasten his fly. She didn’t care if he went from nought to ninety in sixty seconds. She wanted him now.

‘Which part of not touching me didn’t you get?’

‘Every part.’ She thrust her hand inside the back of his leather jeans in order to dig her fingertips into the lovely springy muscles of his arse.

Xane made more of those high-pitched noises, which she decided she rather liked. However, while his arse was glorious and totally squeezable, there was another part of him she was more desperate to feel.

Dani brought one hand between them to encircle his shaft. He was definitely upright, so hard the skin was stretched taut and he was leaking copiously. She massaged the fluid into his length, while watching his expression carefully so as not to push him over the edge. She loved stroking him and the feel of all that power in her hand.

Xane kept his eyes tightly closed and his teeth gritted. Each breath came out like a wheeze.

‘No, don’t stop,’ he pleaded, when she dared to take her hands off him.

‘I thought you said I was going to push you too far if I touched you.’

‘You should touch me,’ he said, revising his opinion. ‘You should touch me all over … everywhere.’

‘I’ve a better idea. Why don’t you put this –’ she gave his erection a squeeze ‘– where we both know it wants to be?’ She was more than ready for him.

Immediately, he twisted at the waist and tried to fish something from his back pocket.

‘No,’ she said, realising that he was searching for a condom. ‘You don’t need to dress up.’

Xane turned back to stare at her. ‘You’re sure?’ They’d both been given clean bills of health, and he knew she’d started taking birth control pills. ‘Has it been long enough?’

‘Yeah. Make love to me, Xane. I want to feel what it’s like when there’s nothing separating us.’ She’d never made love like that.

‘I want to feel that too.’

It took a bit of wriggling to line things up, mostly because their trousers were still snagged around their legs. She didn’t care. She’d been waiting in fevered anticipation of this moment from the day she’d swallowed her first pill.

‘Oh, oh, God!’ It was absolutely worth the wait.

Chapter 9

Xane held himself still, savouring the moment. He was balls deep inside her, and the walls of her pussy were hugging him so tightly he feared for a moment he genuinely would lose control and come on the first thrust like some gauche boy. He’d totally forgotten how good this could be. Not that there was anything wrong about sex with a condom, but it was so damned smooth without.

‘You feel so –’

‘Yes,’ she agreed, instinctively understanding. ‘Move a little.’

Just a little. Yes, he thought he could do that without blasting off into space. He lifted his hips, hated the loss of contact and slid back down. Dani groaned right along with him.

‘Oh, God, you feel so good.’

Agreed. Totally agreed. Though what came out of his mouth was more a guttural groan.

When it came to sex, Xane had done almost everything at least once. Even this, way back in the dim days of his youth, before Black Halo hit it big and he got wise to the ways of the world. But none of his past partners had ever meant anything to him. None of them ever came close to touching his heart in the way Dani did. They met and hooked up, fucked and moved on, with the one exception of Steve, and he was gone and no longer an option. The thought left him momentarily choked, but then he stared down at Dani and all the dark shadows in his life rolled away.

Xane wasn’t sure he believed in soulmates, but if they did exist then Dani was definitely his, because that’s what it felt like, being deep inside her sans condom, that they were meant to be bound together. That the only way the universe could continue to exist was if they remained joined in this way.

Beneath him, Dani struggled against the confines of her clothing. ‘Get these ruddy things off.’ She managed to dislodge her shoes. Xane helped her rip her jeans off, whereupon her legs wrapped tight around his back so that her heels dug into his arse.

That was even better. He pushed deeper, and his body locked into a rhythm that paid no regard to his sanity. To be fair, he didn’t care if he was a blubbering wreck at the end of this. It was too damn good to stop.

She fitted him like a glove. So, so perfectly.

‘Lift up,’ she insisted a moment later. ‘I want to see.’ She released her grip on his body, so that he could raise his body as far as his hips. Her gaze, which had been fixed on his face, rode down his body. Xane followed her line of sight and watched his cock dipping into her pussy. Oh, hell, yeah! That was hot.

‘Can I touch?’ Her cheeks grew cherry-pink at the request.

She could touch him anywhere she liked. He nodded, still incapable of speech.

Dani’s fingers scisssored around the base of his shaft then drew upwards to stroke her clit.

She’d been really self-conscious about satisfying her own needs when they’d first met, but he’d taught her it was OK, that she should never hold back from taking what she needed, or asking for it.

‘Let me,’ he managed to gasp. Even though it was hot as fuck watching her stroke herself, he liked to pretend he was a gentleman. He used his thumb a moment, until a better idea struck him.

He inched up the bed a fraction, so that their hips weren’t quite so perfectly aligned. It meant each time he moved, his shaft stroked against her clit. The angle appeared to do something else too, because she was suddenly panting.

‘Fuck. That’s good.’

Xane smiled on hearing her swear. While most of his acquaintances and all of the band were foulmouthed beasts, Dani, as a rule, was far too nice to use such language. She always blushed after using even the mildest expletive.

‘Tell me that again.’

‘So-o good.’

‘I meant the same as you said it before. The uncensored version.’

She gripped his waist tight, head shaking. ‘Can’t.’

‘I want to hear you scream it. I want the whole world to know how good this is.’

She kept her lips pressed tight.

‘I can’t get enough of fucking you,’ he told her. ‘I want you always.’

‘I love you,’ she said right back at him, and he knew it was true. He saw it in her face, her eyes.

She was so beautiful. He was the luckiest man on earth to have found her.

‘How close are you, Xane?’ she muttered against the bare skin of his shoulder. They were sandwiched together again. ‘Because I’m so close … I’m going to … want us to get there together.’

‘Say it, Dani. Tell me how good it is, and I’ll be right there with you.’

She shook her head, while mewling hard.

Xane eased away from her a fraction. ‘You’re not going to say it. You’re refusing?’ He pulled out, though it damn near killed him to do so. He wasn’t far from the point of no return himself. ‘Reckon I can persuade you.’

He flipped her over and used the wetness seeping from her pussy to lubricate the slide of his cock against her bottom.

‘Oh, fuck!’ she blurted immediately. ‘You’re not going to. Not here. People might arrive.’

‘You think? That’d make for an interesting conversation, don’t you think? Hi, guys, this is my girlfriend, Dani. She’ll be joining us on the tour. We’ll shake hands in just a moment, as soon as I’ve done fucking her in the arse.’

‘You wouldn’t!’ she protested. He noted that she didn’t actually order him not to.

‘Just giving you a little encouragement. He pulled her up onto all fours, and slid back into her pussy. His back was virtually against the bunk above, but he didn’t give a damn. He suspected the restriction even added a certain something.

Not content with driving them both demented with his thrusting, he teased her back entrance again, and wiggled a finger inside.

‘Fuck!’ she swore. ‘Fuck, fuck, fuck.’

Xane wrapped his arms tight around her body and pinched her already steepled nipples. ‘That’s right,’ he encouraged. ‘Say that naughty word, you naughty girl.’

‘Fuck,’ she said again, as he drove them both flat against the mattress.

‘Uh-huh. That’s right, Dani. God, I love fucking you.’

She matched his pace, slap for slap, their bodies slick from the exertion and completely attuned. Xane rode the wave right into oblivion. Lost his focus completely and came hard, aware that she was flying right along with him.

When he finally came down off his high, Dani lay breathless and still quaking beneath him. She nuzzled against his cheek. ‘You’re a bastard sometimes, do you know that?’

‘I thought that’s why you loved me.’ He squeezed her tight.

‘I think I’m lying in a puddle.’

Yeah, that was the hazard of skinny-dipping. Things tended to get a little messy afterwards. ‘Roll over. I don’t mind lying in it.’

‘For real? I take my last comment back. You’re an utter saint.’

They switched positions. Dani rested her head against his chest, breathing quietly. Only after sex did she ever seem entirely at ease in her own skin. Still, he took care not to touch her anywhere that would make her self-conscious. He’d got her to be comfortable around him when she was nude, and it would only damage that to draw attention to her scars in any way.

‘How long do you think we have?’ she asked. Pretty soon the rest of the band would find their way here, and they start their long journey around Europe. There weren’t quite as many stops on this tour as they’d played on past tours, but the venues were all considerably bigger. It’d be gruelling, but the fans needed a chance to say goodbye to Steve as much as they did.

He just couldn’t keep Steve out of his head, though the multitude of endorphins currently flitting around inside him helped keep at bay the melancholia that normally overwhelmed him when he thought about his friend. ‘I’m not sure. Not very long.’ He thought she probably meant to leap up and get dressed, or at least pull on her nightwear while there was no one around who might see her naked and ask awkward questions about the rows of regimented silver scars. ‘Why?’

Her pretty mouth opened into a smile. ‘Because, handsome, I’m not done with you yet. Have you any idea what it’s been like, having to be apart from you? You’ve taught me to –’ She paused and covered her mouth with her hand, but her shy smile had him intrigued. So too did the crimson blush that spread across the top of her cheekbones.

‘Go on,’ he coaxed, giving her hand an encouraging squeeze. ‘I’ve taught you what exactly?’

‘To expect … and, well, to like certain things. Then when you weren’t around, well … there wasn’t any action happening.’

‘There wasn’t any at the studio either.’ So they’d pulled fifteen-hour days. The best way not to get maudlin about the fact she hadn’t been around had been to apply himself to the music. The miracle had been that Ash hadn’t objected. No doubt he was making up for fourteen days without pussy right now by banging Dani’s friend Ginny and whoever else had smiled sweetly at him.

Dani threw a sceptical glance in his direction. ‘So my nightly phone calls didn’t prompt you to any sort of activity?’

He grinned, remembering the tension that had flooded his body every time they’d spoken on the phone. Most of those times, the sexy talk had indeed resulted in him heading to the nearest quiet corner to decompress. ‘That doesn’t count,’ he said. ‘Anyway, I bet you were doing the same thing.’

‘I was not!’ she huffed, then dug her teeth into her plump lower lip. ‘All right, once or twice, but only in the dead of night when I was sure Ginny wouldn’t overhear.’

He laughed. ‘That’s cute.’ It tickled him how uptight she could be about some things. Her years of abuse had conditioned her to think badly of herself for seeking pleasure. Her mum and those dreadful women had a lot to answer for. If he had his way, they’d be locked up for their crimes, but Dani was insistent that it would result in more harm than good. Mostly, though, he suspected she simply didn’t want to relive the pain.

Dani looked at him contemplatively, as though she’d tuned into his thoughts.

‘What?’ he asked.

She shook her head, casting off the sudden darkness. ‘I just realised, I’m naked and you’re not. Get undressed properly otherwise it’ll look really slutty if anyone comes in.’

Like she wouldn’t be covered up and hidden at the sound of the first footstep.

Even with the curtains drawn, she’d be convinced the guys were all lined up on the other side watching them via X-ray vision. Although, to be fair, if they had X-ray goggles, they probably would be.

‘How’s this going to work?’ she asked, seeming to realise what she’d just said.

‘Don’t worry,’ Xane said, tucking her against him. ‘They probably won’t even remember you’re here. In fact, if you’re really unfortunate, that’s exactly what’ll happen, and then you’ll have to put up with four naked male bottoms wiggling about in front of your face in addition to mine.’

The notion instantly sobered her. ‘You mean, you all strip off in front of each other?’

‘Have you seen the size of the bathroom? Babe, it’s like a locker room in here. There’ll be so many arses waving about you’ll not be able to look in any direction without being mooned.’

‘It’s not their backsides waving about I’m concerned over. What if I walk into one of them and they’re hard?’

‘Then tell him to get it out of your face, or I’ll tear the fucking thing off.’ He wasn’t having anyone making any moves on her, and, while he trusted Spook to be a gentleman, he didn’t put it past Ash or Paul to try it on. Ash didn’t understand the concept of exclusivity, total man-whore that he was. As for the new guy, Iain, well … who knew a damn thing about him? With any luck he’d turn out to be gay.

Actually, scratch that. With Dani’s hang-ups, having a gay guy on board would be terrible.

‘Do you get hard in front of one another?’ she asked tremulously.

Xane made a tactical decision not to answer. Considering how much time he and the guys spent living in confined spaces together, of course he’d seen them all standing to attention. He’d heard every one of them masturbate too, except Spook. Spook didn’t do that sort of thing. He’d also shared beds with all of them and done a bit more than that with one person, but Dani really didn’t need to know that.

‘Are you going to help me get out of these things?’ he asked instead, lifting one leather-clad leg.

‘Sure.’

She wriggled down to the foot of the bed in order to drag his leathers off him. Xane happily shimmied out of them and left them on the floor for somebody to trip over. ‘And now what?’ He cocked an eyebrow. ‘Now that you have me totally naked in your bed – what are your plans for me, O wicked one? Are you going to bind me to the bedposts, torture me with feathers and ice cubes? Drive me demented with a hundred thousand nips and kisses?’

She pressed a finger to her smile. ‘None of them. I thought I’d do some total hero worshipping and suck you.’

‘Yeah. Want me to wash first?’

‘Uh uh.’

Oh, boy, being dirty was washing off on her. He hoped hanging around the bus with a bunch of bad asses didn’t change her too much – he liked her exactly as she was.

‘Is that wrong?’ she asked.

Xane stroked her hair. ‘Of course not. It’s hot.’ His cock stirred to life at the mere prospect of her mouth coming anywhere near it. It was fully awake again by the time she’d meandered down his body, by way of his nose and his lips, one elbow, a section of ribs and one or two other bits as well. He liked that she took her time and didn’t just dive on him. Most of the women who claimed to want him had done exactly that. They seemed to be labouring under some strange notion that if they dived straight for his genitals, bypassing conversation, imagination and pretty much any other sort of pleasant human interaction, he’d somehow love them best. Not that that had bothered him for much of his adult life. He freely admitted he’d used sex as a coping strategy. If there was shite in his life, then fucking had been the answer.

It wasn’t like that with Dani. They’d inhabited some of the same dark spaces in the world. They spoke the same language, saw things through a similar lens. Sex with her was a celebration, not a means of escape … at least, mostly. Could he help it if he always craved sex most when he was in emotionally bad places?

‘Hey.’ Dani nipped the flesh near his navel, which made his cock jerk. She was poised over him, ready to deliver on her promise. ‘Say please.’

‘Pretty please.’

‘With a cherry on top?’ She flicked a glance up the length of his body. ‘That’s kind of what your cock looks like, when it’s this red and shiny.’ She gently flicked her tongue over the very tip, causing his cock to flex and grow harder.

‘I can taste myself on you.’

Xane’s fingers curled against the sheets until his knuckles were in danger of cracking.

‘So good. Think I need to taste you some more.’ She swirled her tongue around the tip, as though she were licking an ice-cream, then wrapped him in her heat and started making infuriatingly teasing pulls on his cock.

‘Come here, you.’ Xane made a grab for her and managed to upend her and twist her around so that she was straddled over his face with her knees planted beside his ears. Two could play at this game.

He stuck his tongue out and licked along the whole length of her slit, which caused her to buck and damn near hit her head on the bunk above. ‘Xane! You can’t expect me to concentrate if you’re going to do that.’

‘But I like doing that.’ He did it again to prove the point.

‘OK.’

He liked the way it made her shudder too.

Dani peeped along the length of their bodies at him. ‘Is your view as good as the one I’ve got?’

‘Better. I like having your knees as ear-muffs too. Come closer. Sit on me.’ He pulled her down onto his face, which let him push his tongue right into her. Hell, but she tasted good, all musky and sweet, and, to top that, she gently danced her fingertips over his balls. He tensed a little when he realised what she intended to do, but trusted her to be gentle.

Breathe.

She gently drew one of his nuts into her mouth, and then released it. It felt irrationally good, but bordered on too much. ‘Stop,’ he hissed after a minute or two. ‘Just suck me.’

She did, but he could feel the tension building inside her.

‘What’s the matter, Dani?’

‘Do guys give better blowjobs?’

Oh, fuck! Where had that come from? Were thoughts of him and Steve together still playing on her mind? He wished he could come up with a way of convincing her that his desire for her wasn’t some sort of temporary anomaly. He wasn’t suddenly going to come out as being gay.

‘Xane,’ she prompted him, and he realised his silence had given her the wrong impression.

‘It’s not really about gender. It’s about the individual. And you’re perfect in every way. You don’t have to compete with anyone. Not even a memory.’

Besides, Steve had sucked at sucking. But she didn’t need to know that. The best blowjob he’d had had been courtesy of someone else entirely.

Chapter 10

Dani wanted to believe him, but the fact that he had experience with men and was attracted to them niggled away at her and stirred up all the abandonment issues she had been bequeathed by her father. He’d pretended to be straight – until he ran off with their neighbour’s son. It was hard to believe that Xane wouldn’t eventually do the same.

That said, if she didn’t have faith, then they had no chance of surviving.

Dani looked at him spread out before her. He was perfect in every way, with his ink, his washboard abs and the cute V-shaped ridge she didn’t know the name for that led down to his loins. How could she possibly hold on to him? He was a rock star, and she … she was nobody.

‘Are you doubting that we’re made for each other – again? I guess I’ll have to do something about that.’ He pulled her down onto his face again. Dani shivered as he used his tongue against her clit. It was hard not to believe in him when he was prepared to do this, and to keep on doing it until his tongue surely ached.

‘Damn, end of peace,’ Xane muttered, his hearing obviously a zillion times sharper than hers.

A few seconds later she heard them, the voices of his bandmates growing more distinct as they drew closer to the bus. She felt the suspension shift and settle as they boarded.

‘We should stop now,’ she said.

‘Bugger that.’ Xane wrapped his arms tight around her bottom. ‘I’m not letting them spoil this. I don’t care if they stand and watch.’ Unlike her, he lacked any self-consciousness about his body. Xane was happy to pose naked and, she suspected, got a kick out of being caught having sex.

Dani threw a desperate look towards the curtains to make sure they were still shut. Below the bottom edge she glimpsed a pair of feet. They paused in the doorway.

‘Oh, God!’

‘Do you need a minute?’ Spook Mortensen asked.

Dani frantically scrambled out of Xane’s hold, turned herself about and attempted to dive under the covers. The latter proved impossible with Xane’s weight holding the duvet in place.

‘Or five,’ Xane replied.

Spook sniffed. ‘You’re sure I can’t lie down? I’ll close my eyes and stick my fingers in my ears.’

Dani fretfully shook her head.

‘The lady’s a bit shy.’

‘Right.’ Spook retreated a pace, only to jerk forward again immediately, accompanied by another body. ‘Sorry,’ he apologised, as he was coaxed further into the room by the arrival of yet another person.

Dani covered her mouth with the back of her hand, starting to see the funny side.

‘I thought you wanted to sleep,’ Ash muttered. ‘What are you standing in the doorway for?’

‘I thought you and Iain were having a few more beers together,’ Spook replied.

‘We decided to choose beds first. Didn’t want to be left with last dibs. You know how much I loathe being stuck on the bottom.’

‘I’ll take it,’ Spook volunteered. ‘It makes no odds to me. A bunk’s a bunk.’

‘This one.’ Ash slapped his hand against the middle bunk above where Dani and Xane were lying.

‘Like fuck it is,’ Xane barked, rising slightly. ‘That one’s mine. Think again, Ashley.’

‘If that one’s yours, then why are you in the bottom one?’

‘Because I’m fucking my girlfriend, dummy. In her bunk.’

‘You’re doing it awful quietly.’

Xane rolled his eyes. ‘You interrupted.’ He stuck his head out of the curtains to see what was going on and better address them. ‘Apologise.’

‘Sorry, Dani,’ they chorused as one.

‘Do you want some peace?’ Ash asked, having claimed the other middle bunk.

‘That’d be lovely.’

‘Five minutes?’

‘Ten,’ Xane insisted. The moment they’d all vacated the room, he ripped back the curtains and rolled into the aisle. ‘Come here, you.’ He grabbed hold of her legs, tugged her to the edge of the bed and sat her there.

‘Xane,’ Dani protested. They might have all gone, but the door was still ajar and they might come back at any moment, and she was naked.

Xane rose onto his knees between her thighs. ‘Ash will give us exactly ten minutes, not a second more. Don’t think for a minute that he won’t get a kick out of walking in on us. He’ll probably bring popcorn, and Spook will bring his camera.’

Even more reason for them to save this for another time. Except of course that he was hard and hot and she was pretty eager for another round herself, God help her. If they did walk in she’d be absolutely mortified.

‘OK, do it,’ she said, spreading her legs a little wider. ‘Fast and hard.’

He kissed the inside of her wrist. ‘As you command.’

Xane drove into her. It was fast and furious. Her body shook with the exertion. Her muscles protested, but … oh, yeah … it was good.

His thumb found her clit and he held it there, letting the rhythmic movement of their bodies do the work. It felt as if they were shaking the entire bus. She could imagine the rest of the band sitting downstairs looking up at the ceiling, all of them listening, none of them speaking, and maybe with a cushion or two clasped across their laps.

‘Fuck, Dani!’ He was staring at her, mouth open, a sheen of sweat shimmering on his skin.

‘Yeah,’ she agreed.

‘Those bastards are going to have to give us some regular privacy, or else we’re going to be making a lot of pit-stops. I want to do this with you a lot.’

He’d hear no arguments from her on that score. ‘Xane, I’m …’ She was getting close. The combo of his body slamming tight against hers and his expressed need for her had set her alight. Her insides felt electrified. As though she’d been caught outside in a storm and a bolt of lightning was zapping through her.

He wiggled his thumb, bestowing an extra bit of pressure on her clit.

It was enough. She came in long shudders, her body clamping fast to his as he raced to join her.

His cries soon echoed her own. In fact, it was only because he was so voluble about it that she realised how loud her own groans had become. Embarrassed, she shoved her head into the groove between his shoulder and his pecs.

‘I like hearing you yell my name,’ he whispered against her hair. ‘And it’s not like they didn’t know what we were doing.’

She suspected everyone left in the area knew what they’d been doing, and maybe she didn’t mind all that much.

‘Are you all right?’

‘Sure, but can I get covered up before they all come back?’ She didn’t want to face the looks or the barrage of questions that’d result if any of them saw those rows of silvery scars.

He nodded. Fished around for an item of clothing and failed to lay his hands on any. ‘Let’s climb into my bunk.’ He lifted her up there, before climbing in alongside and closing the drapes. ‘I don’t know where your stuff’s been put, but whatever you need I’ll find for you in the morning.’

‘And if I need a wee during the night?’

He leaned over the edge of the bunk to reach into a cupboard at the foot end, and drew out a black man-sized T-shirt and a pair of his figure-hugging Calvin Kleins. He tucked them under the pillows. ‘There, problem sorted. Now come here and hug me.’

They cozied up.

‘I might wear those tomorrow regardless,’ she said, knowing he liked seeing her in his clothes.

‘Consider anything in my cupboard fair game. I like having my things on you.’

‘And in me.’

Xane pressed his head against hers. ‘Definitely that.’

He fell asleep in her arms, apparently temporarily at peace with the world.

Chapter 11

The following morning, Dani woke to find most of the bunks already vacated. Only the top two still had the curtains drawn across. Xane had left her a note pointing her towards some free cupboard space, and, better still, her suitcase had materialised so she had fresh clothes and undies. She skipped putting on Xane’s shorts, but did wear his T-shirt. Even freshly laundered it seemed to retain his scent.

The bus was in motion, making her descent rather dangerous. She clung to the twin handrails and took it a step at a time. Ash was sitting at the table in the kitchen area. ‘Missing your sea legs?’ he asked.

She nodded.

The door through to where the roadies slept and the back bedroom was closed. Uncertain where she’d find Xane, she settled for staggering towards Ash. They hadn’t really spoken very much so far, but even though Xane often complained about Ash’s antics, it was clear they had a lot of affection for one another.

‘You can sit down. I only bite when I’m asked to.’ He tossed her a wicked grin, one Dani could swear he’d stolen from Xane. Ash’s version didn’t ignite the same fever in her as Xane’s, which was guaranteed to get her thinking dirty thoughts. Nevertheless, it did lend her the courage to come closer.

She fell gratefully into the seat opposite him.

Ash Gore wasn’t as immediately visually arresting as Xane, but he did have dark and brooding down to a fine art. Like Xane, his hair was dyed jet black, but Ash’s was cut shorter, with a long floppy fringe that reached almost to his jawline. His eyes were deep blue and full of boyish mischief. She could absolutely see why Ginny was obsessed.

Not sure what to say, Dani glanced across at what he was reading. It appeared to be a women’s gossip magazine.

‘Sleep all right?’ he asked. He closed the magazine and stuffed it behind a cushion under the window.

‘Yes, thanks.’ She had, actually, after the workout Xane had given her. ‘You?’

He stretched, and then clasped his hands behind his head. ‘Not too bad.’

OK, he was kind of hot, not that she was interested, and it was really cool that she was getting to hang out with the whole of Black Halo like this. A sense of sudden gaiety tugged at her lips. ‘Where is everyone?’ she asked. The bus seemed very quiet.

Ash placed his hands on the table and drummed one finger. ‘Elspeth and Paul are in the back. Spook’s up front with Cave Troll. The rest of the crew are split between the van and the motorhome, and Iain’s still asleep.’

He’d failed to mention Xane.

‘Oh, and your lover boy is hogging the bathroom.’

The door between the front and rear sections opened and closed. ‘I was just brushing my teeth, actually.’ Xane dropped his washbag onto the table between her and Ash before motioning for her to shuffle up. He settled on the chair beside her. ‘Morning,’ he said, giving her a minty-fresh kiss.

Ash wrinkled his nose. ‘Please,’ he pleaded. ‘Don’t get all doe-eyed. I’ll puke.’

Xane kicked him beneath the table.

‘Ow!’

‘You found your suitcase?’ Xane asked her.

‘Yes, thank you.’

‘We’ll get your stuff stowed when we stop. It shouldn’t be too much longer.’

Dani peeped outside. They were driving through what appeared to be a residential area. Xane leaned over and rested his chin upon her shoulder. ‘Was Ash behaving?’

Ash snorted and shot her lover an offended look. ‘I hadn’t even tried it on. Did I try anything on?’

‘I only just arrived. He was reading.’

Xane looked around for evidence of a book and failed to spot one. ‘What were you reading? The invisible book?’

‘A magazine,’ Dani said.

‘Cosmo again? Heat?’ Xane shook his head. ‘You could probably write most of their articles. Is it really necessary to sift through it for tips?’

Ash shot him a dark look that seemed to suggest he’d been keeping up to date with how many kids he’d supposedly fathered or something along those lines. Then he forced a smile. ‘Even masters have to keep up-to-date to remain successful.’ He levelled his gaze at Dani. ‘If this guy ever fails to please, you send him to me for tips. That curl thing he does with his tongue. He learned that from me.’

‘That is such bollocks.’

‘You have a tongue stud too?’ she asked.

‘No way.’ He stuck out his tongue. ‘I have skills without the need for adornment. You just ask your friend Ginny, if you don’t believe me.’ He winked at her.

Damn, she’d never had a chance to say goodbye to her. ‘Did she get off safely?’

‘Condoms were used, yes.’

Oh, God. That wasn’t what she’d meant. Her face filled with heat. ‘I didn’t … I meant …’

Xane started to laugh. ‘Let it go, Dani. He can’t help it. He has a filthy mind. Stuff like that always slips out.’

‘Home safe,’ Ash confirmed, holding up his mobile phone to show her evidence of a text from Ginny. ‘She sent a thank-you once she arrived home and climbed into her jammies.’

‘And that’s all the information we need,’ Xane insisted, holding his hand out to cover the screen. His brows suddenly furrowed. ‘Hey, how did you get that? You know you’re not allowed.’

‘What, this?’ Ash stuffed the phone back into his deepest pocket. ‘I don’t have a phone. What are you talking about, Xane? You know I never carry one. Sally would have kittens.’

Xane shook his head, but he was still smiling. ‘Don’t fuck up,’ he warned Ash. ‘I’ll skewer you, never mind Sally. You got us into no end of shit the last time you misplaced one of those damn things. Ash is distinctly absent-minded when it comes to his possessions,’ he explained to Dani.

‘Can I help it if the world is full of thieves?’

The bus pulled to a stop and Spook wandered up from the front. ‘New phone,’ he remarked. ‘You must have had nearly as many as you’ve had women.’

A man the size of a forklift truck, with a buzz cut and a moon-shaped face, followed him. Dani gathered that this must be Cave Troll, their driver. She could see where the name came from. He did bear a certain resemblance to a man-eating giant.

‘Time for some shut-eye,’ he mumbled, pushing his way past Spook, and Ash, who’d stood. He paused only long enough to check her out before wading into the lower bunk room and diving onto the nearest empty berth. ‘Cute chick,’ he called. ‘Didn’t think we allowed birds on board. Did the rules change?’

‘They did not,’ Xane hollered back.

Ash returned to the table. Rather than sit, he leaned over it, propped on his elbows, so that he was only a few inches away from Dani. ‘What do you think? Is it fair that only Xane’s allowed to party on the bus? Shouldn’t we all be allowed our fun?’

‘I … well … it’s not really up to me.’

‘But you’re here. Don’t you think it’s unfair that you guys get to hang out, but the rest of us have to stare dreamily at each other?’

‘Don’t even think about staring dreamily at me,’ Spook muttered.

‘Well, if you were going steady with someone, then I guess it would be fair for them to be here too,’ she replied, seeking Xane’s approval with her eyes.

‘Ash can’t even hold his guitar steady, let alone a relationship,’ Rock Giant remarked, coming through from the bedroom. Now that the bus had stopped, everyone seemed to be congregating. Seeing that there was no space at the table, he hunched down on the floor with his back to one of the kitchen cupboards.

Dani stared at him. Of all the members of the band, Rock Giant was the one she found most intimidating. He scared her even more than Elspeth, who, to her relief, didn’t appear from the bedroom. He looked different this morning, less frightening without his hair styled into spikes, kind of adorable actually with his thick growth of stubble and his loungewear pants.

‘I don’t know if you’ve ever noticed,’ he continued, ‘but he does this funny jiggly thing while he’s playing, like he’s being electrocuted and can neither grip nor let go of his guitar.’ He simulated Ash’s stage pose.

‘What is this? Pick on Ash day? Fuck you.’ Ash waved his raised middle fingers at them all. ‘Can we eat now?’ he asked after a moment. ‘Now we’re here.’

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