IN THE FLO

A 28-day plan working with your monthly cycle to do more and stress less

Alisa Vitti

Copyright

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First published in Great Britain by HQ in 2020

Copyright © Alisa Vitti 2020

Alisa Vitti asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.

Source ISBN: 9780008327071

Ebook Edition © 2020 ISBN: 9780008327088

Version: 2020-01-06

Advance Praise for In the FLO

“When I first heard Alisa explain the Cycle Syncing Method, I was floored. As someone who has struggled with hormones, I couldn’t believe what we don’t know about our bodies. I didn’t realize how my everyday routine was affecting my mood, my weight, and my energy. Working with Alisa has shown me how to take care of my biological rhythms so I stay in a peak flow state. It’s given me back my energy, made me a happier mom, and made me passionate about sharing this information with other women—it’s about time for us to get In the FLO.”

—Gabrielle Union-Wade, actor, activist, and New York Times bestselling author of We’re Going to Need More Wine

“Living in alignment with our cycle is the next frontier for women’s health. Alisa’s book provides a tool for reconnecting with your unique female biorhythms—a powerful offering toward helping women reclaim hormone health and much-needed life balance.”

—Aviva Romm, MD, author of The Adrenal Thyroid Revolution

“This book teaches you how to use your biology to tune in to your inner guidance and to create optimal flow in every area of your life. It offers a path toward your highest power and potential.”

—Gabrielle Bernstein, #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Universe Has Your Back

“In the FLO is Whole30 meets Bulletproof meets 4-Hour Workweek—but designed exclusively for a woman’s body. This book will change the way you eat, work out, manage your time, and do your work—all in harmony with your body! It’s the next wave in women’s health and, best of all, there aren’t any complicated rules to follow—it’s liberating and logical. Alisa will help you achieve your optimal health and live your best life.”

—JJ Virgin, nutrition expert and New York Times bestselling author of The Virgin Diet

“Alisa is a true pioneer in biohacking for women, and the Cycle Syncing Method is an effective way for women to align with their biological rhythms to optimize not only their health but every other aspect of their lives from career to relationships to motherhood. Every woman should read this book!”

—Mark Hyman, MD, New York Times bestselling author of The Blood Sugar Solution

“Trying to operate on a 24-hour clock can leave moms exhausted. Alisa’s revolutionary cyclical time management method will liberate you from the stress and exhaustion of trying to ‘do it all’ and instead adopt a more sustainable approach. Finally you’ll replace guilt over all the things you aren’t doing with guidance on the best ways to bond with your child and care for yourself week by week.”

—Shefali Tsabary, PhD, psychologist, educator, speaker, and New York Times bestselling author of The Conscious Parent

“In this must-read hormonal guidebook, Alisa Vitti takes readers on a fascinating voyage inside the female body and brain to demystify the science of hormones. And she lays out a one-of-a-kind nutrition and lifestyle plan to balance hormones so you can think smarter, feel better, and stress less. Your body and brain will thank you for it.”

—Daniel Amen, MD, psychiatrist, neuroscientist, and New York Times bestselling author of Unleash the Power of the Female Brain

“Alisa walks you through the miraculous wonder that is your female body and how to connect your health, career, and even sex and relationships with your cycle to achieve amazing results with less effort—better orgasms included.”

—Regena Thomashauer, New York Times bestselling author of Pussy: A Reclamation

Dedication

“Those who flow as life flows know they need no other force.”

LAO TZU

This book is dedicated to my daughter, Ariana.

May you always know the gifts of nature that you contain and the force of nature that you are.

CONTENTS

Cover

Title Page

Copyright

Advance Praise for In the FLO

Dedication

Introduction

Part 1 Our Bodies, Our Time

1 Ending Your Mys-education

2 Break Free from the 24-Hour Clock

3 Beyond Your Period—Understanding Your Hormonal Advantages

Part 2 Getting Your Body in the FLO

4 Never Diet Again

5 Work Out Less, Get More Fit

6 Your Blueprint to Do More with Less Stress

Biohacking Tool Kit

Part 1: How to Get in the FLO When Your Hormones Are Out of Balance

Part 2: What to Know If You’re on Hormonal Birth Control

Part 3 Getting Your Life in the FLO

7 Sustainable Success at Work

8 Get More of What You Want in Sex and Relationships

9 Making Motherhood Easier

10 Dynamic, Wise, and Free

Meal Plans

Recipes

Guides and Resources

Footnote

References

Index

Acknowledgments

Also by Alisa Vitti

About the Publisher

FEEL BETTER AND LIVE SMARTER WITH IN THE FLO

I’ve created a special bundle of resources to help you put into action what you learn in this book, including a quick-start program to help you get started, a bonus self-care guide, a community where you can connect with other readers, special downloads, and more! You can access everything for free at www.IntheFLObook.com/bonus.

Introduction

What’s the greatest lesson a woman should learn? That since day one, she’s already had everything she needs within herself. It’s the world that convinced her she did not.

—RUPI KAUR

I remember from a young age hearing from multiple sources that to succeed as a woman you have to work hard—twice as hard as a man, in fact. Early on, I felt a drive to do as much as I could and to push myself. In school, I took all of the hardest classes, worked for top grades, and was involved in activities to develop my creative talents and practice leading teams. These are all admirable pursuits—but I noticed that my drive came with a cost. In high school I was regularly up past midnight trying to complete homework. I was spread as thin as I could be, and now, looking back, I can see the toll it was taking on my body. The pressure I felt to perform, create, achieve, and work only grew, however, as I continued on through college and into my career. All the while, my health issues became more problematic. My anxiety went from occasional to constant, my insomnia became a nightly problem, I was gaining weight despite being active daily, my skin was breaking out, my periods were missing, and I felt more and more overwhelmed by all that I had to do. Instead of being invigorated by the things I wanted to do, I felt unable to tackle them and drained. I criticized myself for procrastination, for inefficient time management, and for not having my body and my life perfectly together. I tried diets, workouts, and planners, and I bought every inspirational book I thought might help me figure out how to do it all. I see my struggles reflected all the time in the lives of other women—and the fact is we’re working long hours but struggling to get everything done, care-taking children and friends with little time left over to rest, exercising constantly but not seeing results, trying to eat well but still feeling blah—and we find we have less and less energy left to create our best work, nurture our relationships, and access our joy for life in general. We’re all looking for a way to make everything more doable, but doing everything still leaves us feeling like somehow we’ve failed.

Our culture forces us to keep pushing, pushing, pushing. We overstretch ourselves, our expectations, our bodies, and our time. We race breathlessly to keep up with never-ending to-do lists, put everybody else’s needs first, and juggle career and family. We look outside ourselves—relying on magazine articles or male-centered health research—for healthy living strategies rather than listening to the inner wisdom of our biochemistry.

As a result, our physical health is deteriorating. Fibroids, endometriosis, polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), infertility, low sex drive, premature ovarian failure (POF), and challenging perimenopause are all on the rise. Chronic stress takes a toll on our bodies, our abilities to pursue our dreams, and our bonds with the people we love. At our deepest levels, we feel we’re not good enough, not smart enough, not organized enough to achieve what we desire in our lives.

What if I told you that there was a secret blueprint you’ve had available to you for years—a simple way to be more powerful and more effective in all areas of your life? Not only have you been ignoring it, you’ve viewed it as a liability. You’ve even tried to override this powerful tool, unintentionally dampening its force and causing it to work against you. As a result, it’s sapping your energy, making you sick, and holding you back from getting everything you want—and deserve—in life.

The secret isn’t really a secret—it’s been within you all along. I’ll cut right to the chase: your female biochemistry, and more specifically, your hormonal cycle—the one you probably lament on a monthly basis—is an incredible asset. Think of it as our unique and miraculous female advantage. It’s a game-changing tool we can use to empower every aspect of our lives—if we will only leverage it.

The problem is, we’ve been taught the opposite about our hormonal cycle. From the moment women get our first periods, we’re told about the cramps, the premenstrual syndrome (PMS), the burden our bodies must now take on. From a young age, we’re taught to feel ashamed rather than empowered by our bodies. Something that is so fundamental to us—our biochemistry, our reproductive system, our menstrual cycle—is twisted into “the curse” that we must hide or “deal with” rather than celebrate and use. We’ve been conditioned to ignore our hormonal cycle until something goes wrong with it. Then we treat it like an adversary that needs to be tamed with medication or other interventions so we can go back to ignoring it. This treatment has created a dysfunctional relationship with our hormones, our bodies, and ourselves—obliterating the power of our hormones and rendering them ineffective at best and a stumbling block at worst.

The good news is, with some simple lifestyle tweaks you can tap into this natural power source to biohack your way to better health and fitness, enhance your productivity, master time management, and enjoy greater success in every area of your life. Best of all, it’s really easy (compared with exhausting yourself trying to cram as much as possible into your day, striving to accomplish impossible to-do lists, and ignoring your most basic physical needs). By living, eating, and working in synchrony with your cyclical nature rather than fighting against it, you can unleash your creativity, fire up your energy, strengthen your relationships, and even be a better mom (if you’re a mom). You’ll use time strategically instead of being a slave to your calendar, increasing your energy and ultimately getting more done with fewer struggles. You’ll tap into that elusive sensation of “flow”—that incredible feeling you have when everything just clicks. You’ll be able to reframe your concept of success to feel great about yourself rather than tear yourself down. You’ll intuitively understand how to manage stress, increase self-satisfaction, quiet your inner critical voice, improve your health, and empower yourself to become productive and efficient in ways that are sustainable for you.

All this is achievable, but we can’t access our full potential when we’re living by someone else’s rules and not listening to the wisdom within. Simply put, we are round pegs trying to fit ourselves into square holes—no wonder we’re exhausted. We live out of sync with our unique female brain and body chemistry; we don’t eat in a pro-hormonal way that gives our endocrine system the building blocks it needs to keep our hormones balanced, and too often we’re prescribed medications like synthetic hormones that further prevent us from accessing the inherent gifts inside our bodies that could help us live our best lives. Our non-female-centric diet and lifestyle put a strain on a system that is perfectly equipped by nature to keep our hormones balanced and health optimized. Being out of sync with our female chemistry weakens our thyroid, our ovaries, our livers, our adrenals, our immunity, and our digestion. In fact, being out of sync weakens everything about our physical health, makes our thinking foggy, and takes us out of our creative zone.

The truth is, all the cultural myths about women’s bodies—that we are inherently weaker, more vulnerable to aging, less worthy of study—are BS. We’ve been sold a lie—harmful propaganda that says our body and biochemistry are a disadvantage. It’s time to flip the script. I’ve pioneered the groundbreaking Cycle Syncing Method™ to empower women, finally, to use their hormones in ways that are nothing short of revolutionary.

Syncing with your cycle is all about knowing where you are in your menstrual cycle and using that knowledge to understand yourself better and support yourself as hormone levels change. In my first best-selling book, WomanCode, I shared the eye-opening message that you could put your hormonal problems—think PMS, PCOS, fibroids, and endometriosis—into remission naturally with food and diet changes. I knew this message would create an “aha moment” for many women, but I was absolutely blown away by the response. What I learned from the hundreds of thousands of women who have reached out to me since then—at our center, at wellness conferences where I speak, via social media, and through the MyFLO app—was even more important. Listening to their stories, I realized there was a much bigger message to share—that the false notions about our female biochemistry have robbed us of far more than just our hormonal health. They’ve stolen our confidence, our vitality, and the very opportunity to live our best lives.

Enough!

The time to reclaim your female biochemistry is now. You just need to learn how to start tapping into its power. This book will help you do it. Drawing on leading-edge research in the fields of neuroendocrinology, functional medicine, nutritional genomics, chronobiology, integrative nutrition, and behavioral psychology, this book will explore the intersection of hormones, neurochemistry, and productivity—all in an effort to allow you to reconnect with the feminine advantage that resides within you. The book will also give you a new female-centered paradigm to manage your time and productivity more effortlessly, in ways specifically tailored to your female needs.

Once you have the foundational, perspective-shifting knowledge needed to reverse the cultural conditioning that’s been holding us back, I’ll break down the four phases of your hormonal cycle and how they affect your brain, moods, energy, and behaviors. You’ll learn how to care for yourself in each unique phase and harness strengths around your creativity, energy, emotions, and sexuality. I’ll also introduce you to a female-centered form of time management that works with your hormonal phases to help you get more done with less stress and get more enjoyment out of everything you do. In other words, we’ll throw out living exclusively by the standard 24-hour clock (which—no surprise—happens to be in alignment with the male hormonal cycle) and shift to a more sustainable 28-day approach. This book provides a clear plan to biohack your health and fitness in ways that are specifically tailored to your unique biochemistry, and offers tips to help you bring these insights beyond self-care and personal time management, into your interactions with the larger world around you. Believe me, we get into the nitty-gritty. You’ll know on what day to ask for that promotion, the best time to do yoga or cardio, when to double up on leafy greens, the best week to spend time being introspective and gentle with yourself, and when to unleash your social butterfly.

The book also provides a planner and evaluation tool to help you engage this superpower, and teaches you how to heal the root causes of your hormone imbalances to create a lifestyle that keeps you from being vulnerable to new imbalances, and lets you harness your body’s innate patterns as a tool for peak productivity, flow, and happiness. Even if you aren’t suffering from hormonal imbalance, you can benefit from tuning in to your female biochemistry to help you achieve more with less stress.

I teach women of all ages all across the world how to use the Cycle Syncing Method™ every day—and their hormonal health and lives are transforming in ways they never dreamed possible. (Take note: you can engage this cycle even if you’re postmenopausal or are no longer bleeding.) Whether you’re coming to this book to relieve health issues, decrease stress, or just to figure out how to live your best life, there’s something here for you.

This is the right book for you if any of these statements rings true:

• You feel like you are always trying to do it all, but there’s never enough time.

• You strive to give 100 percent in every area of your life, but it’s hard to keep up with your own expectations.

• You want to be more creative, more enterprising, more consistent, but you feel like you start and then don’t follow through.

• You have tried every kind of planner to be more organized.

• You’ve tried every diet and fitness program and don’t get the results you want.

• You’re interested in biohacking, but not sure where to start.

• You feel continually drained and overwhelmed by all the commitments in your life.

• You want to be having more fun and pleasure in your life, but you struggle to stay up with your to-do list and often feel like you haven’t earned enjoyment.

• You have PMS, PCOS, fibroids, endometriosis, ovarian cysts, infertility, or any other period problems.

• You’ve already seen functional medicine doctors and your regular obgyn and tried everything—acupuncture, in vitro fertilization (IVF), birth control, other medications, antidepressants, skincare treatments, diuretics for bloating, ibuprofen for cramps—and you’re still not getting the results you want.

• You’re eating a healthy diet but you’re still having symptoms.

• You’re a mom with a tween or teen struggling with her period, skin, weight, or moods.

• You are in the first half of perimenopause and are experiencing symptoms.

• You’re not enjoying your relationship or sex life as much as you’d like to be.

• You feel disconnected from your body or feminine energy.

• You think being a woman means you’re destined to suffer.

• You want to live your best life, but need a sustainable way to do it.

IS THIS BOOK FOR YOU?

This book is written for women, but some people who identify as women may not have the biochemical or physical makeup being explored here. What if you’re trans, nonbinary, or taking estrogen or testosterone as you undergo gender transition? You may not fit into a traditional gender box. However you self-identify or wherever you are in your gender journey, understand that working with your unique reality is a gift that is available to everyone. How should you approach using the Cycle Syncing Method™ if you’re transgender, for example? For people transitioning to female, following this program may help you feel more connected to your feminine energy even if you’re not menstruating. For those who are transitioning to male but still menstruating, you may prefer to get in tune with the more linear, 24-hour male pattern. In that case, you may not want to follow a cyclical program. The bottom line is that it’s entirely up to you.

In these pages, you’ll meet some of the amazing real-life women who have adopted this program and not only have found solutions to their hormonal problems, but also have unlocked their potential—gaining the confidence to do the things they’d always dreamed of doing. You can gain this confidence, too.

Once you understand the concept, it’s all very simple. You just need to cut through the misinformation and turn on the power of your body and the time it keeps. After reading this book, you will take with you the scientific understanding, the tactical plan, and the inspiration to change your life immediately.

In addition to these practical benefits for your health and productivity, you’ll gain the opportunity to come home to yourself—to heal the wounds of feminine disconnection. We have tried to survive in a noninclusive culture for too long by compromising too much of ourselves. We don’t have to squeeze ourselves into this paradigm. What women are in desperate need of now is a female-centered framework for how to live. That’s where this book comes in.

This book:

• will give you the freedom and permission to do what’s right for you more of the time.

• will end the confusion about how your hormones work and how they affect more than your period and fertility so you’ll know what to expect and what your hormonal advantages are.

• will teach you to biohack so hormonal issues never sideline you again.

• will give you a blueprint to use your hormonal advantages to create a life of more ease, joy, and flow.

In chapter 1, you’ll discover the truth about the amazing female body and unlearn some of the misinformation that’s been keeping us confused, ashamed, and struggling with an array of health issues. You’ll hear about my own hormonal saga and understand why we’re so often misunderstood and misdiagnosed.

Chapter 2 will describe the differences between the 24-hour circadian clock and the 28-day infradian clock (yes, there are two!), offering you a new approach to time management, productivity, and success that will help you step off the proverbial treadmill and start living in sync with your natural rhythms.

Chapter 3 will explore the workings of the female system and show you how your hormones affect your moods, brain chemistry, immune system, energy, and more. The chapter will remind you that whenever negative voices pipe up to deny the power of your female system, it’s just cultural conditioning—not fact—that leads you to doubt the workings of your body. Science proves nature intended you to be in sync with your cycle, so you can be confident in embracing this new female-centered way of living.

In chapters 4, 5, and 6, you’ll discover how to apply the simple, female-centered Cycle Syncing Method™ around diet, fitness, and time management. This is where biohacking meets self-care. You’ll learn how to use food to support your hormones during each phase of your cycle, reveal the secrets to getting better results with less sweat, and introduce you to planning tools that will help you achieve more with less effort.

A Biohacking Tool Kit following chapter 6 introduces you to approachable steps to balance your uniquely female hormones and neurochemistry to troubleshoot period, fertility, and other hormonal problems to transform your cycle into a source of empowerment and wisdom rather than pain. I want to help you solve your period issues, so you can start accessing the amazing benefits of living in sync with your cycle!

Chapter 7 shows you how to navigate your work life and reenvision productivity and success through the lens of cyclical living and your four-part creative cycle, so you can work in a more sustainable way—whether you’re an entry-level employee trying to chart your career path, an entrepreneur in the trenches of the start-up phase, a corporate exec leading a team of hundreds, or a volunteer in the nonprofit sector trying to make a difference in the world.

Chapter 8 debunks the myths we’ve all learned about love and sex and delivers the ultimate guide to communication, connection, intimacy, orgasm, and foreplay—all based on your hormonal cycle.

In Chapter 9, you’ll find out how to let go of the pressure to be the perfect mom at all times and discover how to embrace the different emotional realities of all four phases of your cycle.

Chapter 10 encourages you to embrace your feminine energy and tap into your power, because your health, success, relationships, and daughters are counting on you.

The Cyclical Promise

This is more than a book. It’s a language and a model for female-centered living. It’s a reclamation and a positive galvanizing force for women today to truly embrace ourselves, making our point of view and our bodies the center point of our self-reference. This book will be the catalyst for an entirely new lifestyle for you regardless of your background, age, or stage in life. We’re not meant to be in perpetual productivity mode, pushing all the time for results. Nothing in nature works that way. We simply need to get back into sync with the four-part blueprint that our female body maps out for us. Then and only then will we be able to pursue the life we’re meant to live as women—liberated and free.

Once you discover this blueprint for yourself, you might wonder why we aren’t taught this as young women. Wouldn’t it be amazing to know all this from puberty onward? How much more strategically could you design your life with your best interests at the center? As frustrating as these revelations might be, they motivate us to work toward a better future for ourselves and for women and girls to come.

Now is a pivotal moment to seize this opportunity. Times are changing—we’re in the midst of a long overdue, much-needed shift in our perceptions of our bodies and in our expectations regarding our health care. In the past few years, in large part thanks to millennials taking to social media, we’re realizing some key things:

1. The taboos and myths surrounding menstrual periods are outdated, false, and a tool of patriarchal oppression that holds us back.

2. Hormones affect everything beyond our periods—our moods, creativity, energy, and more.

3. Our menstrual needs are not being effectively addressed by conventional health care services.

4. Our hormonal cycle is not being adequately factored into emerging conversations in functional medicine and biohacking, or medical research.

As we work to reduce gender disparity in the workplace and in society in general, this desire for adequate care for our hormonal needs might be the final frontier of smashing the patriarchy. After menstrual mainstreaming, women deserve more: more transparency in information about birth control side effects, more health care options for menstrual problems, more gender-tailored biohacking suggestions and research.

We deserve better.

We deserve to live on our own terms and on our own time.

PART 1

OUR BODIES, OUR TIME

It takes years as a woman to unlearn what you have been taught to be sorry for.

—AMY POEHLER

CHAPTER 1
Ending Your Mys-education

Girls are taught to view their bodies as unending projects to work on, whereas boys from a young age are taught to view their bodies as tools to master the environment.

—GLORIA STEINEM

I remember it vividly—the day we were finally getting to the human reproduction section of our textbook in eighth-grade biology class. I loved my teacher, Mr. Bing. I loved school. And I loved biology most of all. For me, it represented the intersection of philosophy, art, and nature—I was perfectly suited to its study. I was expecting a banner day in class. We began as we always did, with Mr. Bing giving a brief introduction to the subject, followed by a fifteen-minute period to read the related section in the textbook, then discussion, questions, and a project assignment. In the past, these assignments included replicating a DNA model, making a cross-section of a cell, and dissecting cow eyeballs and frogs. One of my favorite projects involved selecting a tree to observe from winter to spring bloom and collecting samples of the development from bud to flower, pressing them, and sketching the components of the plants. The project taught me a lot about the natural rhythm of life—waiting for a tiny seed to grow, then watching it bloom and finally wither away. That lesson stuck with me, but as much as I liked that one, this day’s subject was on a whole other level. I sat at my desk, barely able to control my excitement as Mr. Bing introduced the topic—human reproduction. Then I got down to reading. It just so happened that, sequentially, we read about sperm production first. The language was potent—it read something like:

The testes are powerhouses of efficient production. They produce two to three hundred million spermatozoa daily. Each sperm itself is a perfect delivery system for genetic material to the egg—the shape, the tail, the nutrients that give the sperm its mobility and motility—all in perfect concert for its ultimate goal—getting to the egg first to share genes.

“Wow! Nature is brilliant by design, and if I had balls, I’d be proud,” I thought.

I moved on to the section about women’s reproduction. I couldn’t wait to read about the incredible inner workings of my own body. But what I got was something like this:

After the development and release of one egg from the ovary, the female reproductive process is twofold. In the case of conception, the lining thickens, the uterus grows, the placenta forms, and the miracle of life begins in the safe confines of the womb. If not, then the lining sheds and is lost and the cycle begins again.

“That’s it?” I thought.

I was struck by the change in tone, the light treatment of the process, and the glossing over of the major things we do—you know, bleed and not die, and—oh yeah—3-D print tiny humans. No biggie! The textbook hinted at disappointment if we didn’t conceive. It painted our hormonal process as belonging in value only to those outside of us—men for procreation, and babies for the 3-D printing. Sure, I was only fourteen—what did I know? But I was the girl who was so fascinated and excited about this phase of my life that I had started the “Period Club” with my three best friends a few years earlier after our very first sex ed class in sixth grade. The Period Club had two main functions: (1) to share guesses about which member would get her period first, and (2) to justify frequent trips to the bathroom during lunch and recess to see whether any of us had started bleeding. I was years into being awestruck by the thought of my approaching womanhood. I took the sex ed textbook’s lackluster description of the female system personally. I found it hurtful.

And the disconnect didn’t stop there. I would encounter this same weird tone and deeply disturbing oversight of the obvious power of our bodies in every context describing our biological process as my studies progressed over the years—from Mr. Bing’s biology class to the hallowed halls of Johns Hopkins University, where I went to college for my undergraduate degree. From the mechanical descriptions of how long a “normal” cycle should be, to the time frame given for dilation of the cervix during labor—all was presented in a dry, clinical way that was definitely not empowering for women. The insidious implication, of course, was that if we deviated from that standard performance, we were abnormal disappointments of nature and needed medical intervention.

What I read didn’t just make me feel hurt. I was pissed. Where was the description matching the positive view of sperm production? I wanted to see a description that read like this:

The female reproductive system is the crowning achievement of human evolution and reproduction. Efficient and highly adaptable, seven hormones work in symphonic relationship to cause four highly refined processes to take place in a given monthly cycle: the development of multiple follicles, ovulation, the building of the lining of the uterus (to prepare for possible conception), and the release of that lining when conception does not occur. When conception does occur, the process of gestation is absolutely breathtaking. The rate of growth of the fetus made possible by changes in the woman’s hormones, immune function, and metabolism is astonishing. And the fact that this process is also beneficial to the mother is remarkable as well. The process of labor and delivery—one that seems to pose extreme physical danger—is the peak example of how women’s bodies transform into a channel of power to safely deliver the baby and preserve themselves. The female body, biologically potent, supports this menstrual and reproductive process by being the more efficient extractor of micronutrients from food, by having the more developed immune system, by having a slightly slower metabolic system to retain nutrients for as long as possible before the elimination system gets to them, and by having more connections of nerve fibers between the two hemispheres of the brain. This biological precision ensures that a woman is sensitive to herself, her body, her community, and her environment, so she can make the best decisions for her well-being, as she is the one privileged by nature’s design to carry the intense responsibility of creating the next generation of humans. And when not creating a human, all of these same systems support her in being a strong and attuned leader in her community and in the world.

The fact that this isn’t what young people—both girls and boys—are taught is tragic and JUST. SO. WRONG. As someone who has spent her life studying the female hormonal symphony and who has dedicated her career to helping women get in sync with their cycles, I can tell you that any less awe-inspiring description does not capture the truth—not even close.

Many years passed before I stumbled upon the reason that the female reproductive process wasn’t described in all its glory, the way it should be. What I discovered floored me. Quite simply, acknowledging the power of the female reproductive process would shift the power dynamics in our global culture. If we all agreed that, biologically, women are not the weaker sex, then pretty much everything about our societal norms would have to change to make space for women to have equal footing. And it seems the patriarchy hasn’t been interested in this happening. You don’t need me to tell you about the thousands of years of female oppression across every culture. But it’s eye-opening to realize that even the education we receive about our bodies—from how it’s described in textbooks to how it’s handled (or pejoratively represented) in the medical community—not only supports and deepens that oppression, but worse, also makes women complicit as self-oppressors. If we believe that we’re destined to suffer and that we shouldn’t expect our bodies to function symptom-free, we won’t believe that we have any power to improve our hormonal functioning.

When we do not know what is really going on with our bodies—when our biology is our blind spot—we don’t have our own legs to stand on. We don’t know who we are. We don’t grow up believing we are gifted by nature’s design to be fully equipped to lead. And because of that, we give away our power in a thousand ways every day—from denying our own nature by trying to fit into our male-dominated culture, to suffering needlessly due to rampant hormonal dysfunction, to holding back our potent life force because we’ve never been taught how to care properly for our beautifully complex system.

Let’s be real. Your sex ed class sucked. Media and advertising messages hammered it into your head that your period was something dirty you needed to hide. This mythology and lack of education keeps you from appropriate self-care. Our culture convinced us our bodies are projects to endlessly work on, while boys’ bodies are power tools that help them master their lives. Is it any surprise we’re out of sync with our bodies? Because of this faulty introduction to womanhood, we seek to suppress our biology because we believe it will help us be more successful. And it isn’t working. Everything you’ve tried to get rid of—your unwanted weight, PMS, and breakouts—is a bust. Your efforts to move up the corporate ladder or launch your own business compromise your health more than you’d like. In addition to being overextended with invisible work, actual work, and motherhood, we add our drive to be perfect to our wellness activities, too. What you don’t realize is that we struggle needlessly, drained of the energy we need to create, because we look for help from diets, healing protocols, and time management tools that leave the female cycle out of the equation. Most of the advice you’re following is intended for men with the assumption—and it’s a big one—that the same advice will translate to women. I’ve got news for you—it doesn’t.

Our mys-education runs deep. And it has to end now!

The Truth Behind the Most Common (and Harmful) Period Myths

Our mys-education is responsible for some very common myths about menstruation that make us feel bad about our hormonal cycles, our bodies, and about womanhood in general. It’s time to set the record straight.

Myth 1: PMS is just part of having a period

Mood swings. Bloating. Breakouts. We’re told these premenstrual symptoms are normal. News flash: They’re not. This myth about PMS is very harmful because it forces you to suffer unnecessarily. When you’re conditioned to believe that pain and problems are par for the course, you’re prevented from looking for solutions. The PMS myth does further damage, as it is used against women to dismiss our feelings, opinions, and judgments. People put us in the box of “being hormonal” (as if men don’t have hormones too!) as a way to devalue women.

The truth: Science shows us that PMS symptoms arise only when there is an imbalance of estrogen and progesterone during the luteal phase. This imbalance can be triggered by diet choices—such as coffee, sugar, dairy, dieting, juice fasts, and low-fat fads—or by the more insidious suppression of feminine energy—the energy of change. According to the National Institutes of Health’s BioCycle Study, the longer PMS goes unchecked and untreated, the greater the risk for cancer, heart disease, diabetes, and dementia postmenopausally. When women live in tune with their cycle, eating the right foods and nurturing their feminine energy, PMS symptoms disappear. The premenstrual phase can actually be a time of insight, clarity, and direction. It can fill you with a can-do, get-it-done attitude and a desire to clean house—literally and metaphorically. I have renamed PMS “prioritizing my self,” and if more women did the same, we would have far fewer premenstrual symptoms.

Myth 2: Cramps are unavoidable

More than half of all women of reproductive age say they have some period pain for one to two days each month. Have you ever caught yourself thinking you’re supposed to have cramps, or that as a woman you were destined to be cursed with painful periods? When you’ve been told your whole life that period pain is just a reality to “deal with” or “get over,” you accept it and don’t expect it to be any better. It’s time for a reality check—you don’t have to suffer from cramps.

The truth: Yes, your body produces one type of prostaglandin—PgE2—that causes uterine contractions and in excess can lead to cramps. But did you know that your body also pumps out two additional types of prostaglandin—PgE1 and PgE3—that are antispasmodic in nature and counteract those contractions? Thanks to these natural painkillers, your body effectively has twice the capacity to relieve pain than to cause cramps. The good news is that when you consume the right foods for your cycle, you provide the building blocks your body needs to promote the production of the good prostaglandins that ease period pain.

Myth 3: Being on the pill helps you regulate your period

If you’re like most of the women I talk with, you probably believe that you still menstruate when you’re taking synthetic birth control pills. After all, many women on the pill bleed each month.

The truth: What you experience when you’re on the pill is not a real period. It’s actually a “withdrawal bleed” that bears no physiological resemblance to the natural period that comes at the end of your monthly hormonal cycle. You may be surprised to discover that the placebo week found in most birth control packs was created as a marketing ploy. In the early days of the pill, manufacturers thought women would be so disturbed by the idea of not bleeding at all that they wouldn’t want to use it. That’s how the placebo week was born. For real menstruation to occur, you need to be ovulating; but the pill prevents this critical phase of your cycle. Without ovulation, your gorgeous hormonal cycle gets stuck in a static low-hormone phase and can’t create a period. Furthermore, synthetic birth control does not correct hormonal imbalances; it merely suppresses your own hormonal function and allows you to go years or decades without addressing the root causes of symptoms, which makes your overall health worsen. And then there are all the nasty side effects to consider—and I don’t mean just the ones listed in the little pamphlet that comes with your synthetic birth control packet. In the upcoming Biohacking Tool Kit section, you’ll learn that there are many more downsides your gynecologist probably never informed you about—for example, that the pill depletes nutrients, disrupts your microbiome, and increases depression.

Myth 4: You don’t need to have a period

Every few years, an article will come out claiming that there’s no reason for modern-day women to have a period and that we would actually be better off and healthier if we didn’t bleed on a monthly basis. Some ob-gyns give their patients the green light to toss the placebos and take the active birth control pills continuously to skip bleeding indefinitely.

The truth: Yes, it’s amazing that as a species we’ve discovered how to outsmart our bodies by suppressing our cycle, but that doesn’t mean we should. Nature is infinitely more intelligent than we are and gave us the gift of the cycle as a way to protect our long-term health. Tampering with that system by intentionally skipping your period comes with real side effects and health dangers. Ovulation, and therefore menstruation, plays an important role in safeguarding our health for decades to come and protecting us from osteoporosis, heart disease, breast disease, and dementia. Every ovulation and cycle puts protective benefits into your health “bank account” for the years when you stop having a cycle. Our menstrual cycle is so critical to our overall health and well-being that the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists has decreed that menstruation is the fifth vital sign, just as important as pulse, temperature, breathing rate, and blood pressure. If your period has gone MIA, it is considered a sign of a health issue such as low estrogen levels, which have been linked to heart issues and bone weakness. If you’re missing periods due to polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS), or if you have irregular cycles, it’s a sign your hormonal system is off-kilter and will likely be accompanied by symptoms like acne, mood swings, or weight gain. A period that arrives like clockwork each month is just as important as having healthy blood pressure levels at your annual checkup. I recommend monitoring your period—tracking the color and consistency, duration, and intensity—to stay on top of your hormonal health. In the Biohacking Tool Kit section, we’ll take a deeper dive into menstruation to help you interpret the color of your monthly bleed, fix your specific period problems, and have a happier cycle.

Myth 5: If you have a bad period, there’s not much you can do

When you get a cold, do you just let it run its course, or do you take action to promote faster healing? Of course it makes sense to pop vitamin C, get more rest, and take better care of ourselves. It’s odd that when we’re having period-related symptoms—cramps, heavy bleeding, or spotting—we tend to ignore our problems. We believe it’s our lot in life to have painful periods, so we don’t do anything about it.

The truth: This way of thinking is the direct result of the paltry education we receive about our hormones and what kind of support they need, because the reality is you can do something. You can take action, change your hormonal reality, and have a better period. Just as you wouldn’t let your cold linger unnecessarily, you don’t have to put up with problem periods. With some simple cyclical lifestyle hacks—think food, exercise, supplements, and the way you manage your time—you could see results as soon as your next cycle.

YOU ARE A BIOLOGICAL POWERHOUSE

Women are inherently abundant by design. We can make multiple babies, we bleed every month, we produce milk—heck, we even secrete vaginal bacteria that’s vital for a baby’s optimal gut health. Nearly every function of our body replenishes life. For example, check out the life-giving power of your reproductive fluids.

• Menstrual blood: Researchers have discovered that stem cells found in menstrual blood may have the potential to be used in treatments for stroke, liver damage, and other conditions. Period blood doesn’t seem so “dirty” anymore, does it?

• Breast milk: New science suggests that nipples absorb a baby’s saliva, which may program the mammary glands to pump out made-to-order germ fighters the baby needs. One study in 2013 showed that immune factors in a mother’s milk change quickly in response to a baby’s infection. It’s Mommy, MD, to the rescue!

• Vaginal secretions: Bacteria in the birth canal seeds a baby’s gut microbiome for optimal health. Babies born by cesarean section, who miss out on this bacterial bath, have a much higher risk of developing chronic immune disorders, such as asthma, allergies, juvenile arthritis, inflammatory bowel disease, and even leukemia, according to a study published in 2014 that included two million children over a span of 35 years. The medical community is finally tuning in to this critical process; a 2016 pilot study that involved swabbing C-section babies’ mouths and bodies with their mothers’ vaginal bacteria showed promise for restoring the babies’ gut microbiome. Now that’s pussy power!

Meanwhile, more research is being done on fecal transfers—which involve transplanting fecal matter from a healthy donor into the gastrointestinal tract of another—to treat conditions like Crohn’s disease and ulcerative colitis. Why not look to the female body’s treasures instead? Our much-maligned fluids have so much untapped potential. Who knows what could be possible if researchers devoted as much interest to women’s fluids as they do to, well, poop?

Life in the Boys’ Club

There’s no denying it: we have been living in a man’s world—although, thankfully, with more women in leadership positions in the private and public sectors, this reality is bound to change, and soon. Our cultural values prioritize masculine energy of individuality and linear progression at the expense of all else, which is reflected in the breakdown of our communities and the disregard for the health of our planet. In addition, our foundational beliefs about our own health are largely informed by research done by men, on male subjects. Even our daily routines are all based on the 24-hour male cycle. Yes, men have a hormonal cycle too! We just never talk about their cycle, because we cater to it every day. We’ll learn more about our own hormonal symphony soon, but for now, let’s look at a day in the life of male hormones.

Male 24-Hour Hormonal Cycle

• Morning: Testosterone and cortisol levels are at their highest when he wakes up, making him energetic, communicative, laser-focused, ready for sex (cue the morning erection), and super-efficient at getting stuff done.

• Afternoon: Declining testosterone puts him in the mood to socialize and connect with people. This is when he wants to pitch ideas to clients, network with colleagues, and meet up for a date.

• Evening: Testosterone levels wane, making him more sensitive to his estrogen, and generally more interested in cocooning on the couch or finding other ways to quiet his mind.

Notice anything? This schedule lines up almost perfectly with the way a typical day in a typical life—male or female—plays out. We wake up early and immediately start fielding email. We spend the early part of the workday tearing through our agenda. Then in the afternoon we continue to work through our to-do list, though our productivity has already peaked. After work, it’s happy hour—time to commiserate and blow off steam! Finally, we collapse in front of the TV, ready to relax after a day full of ups and downs.

Just hit repeat on this cycle day after day, 365 days a year. It’s that simple. Or is it? Women’s 28-day cycle bears no resemblance to this 24-hour schedule, but we have been forced to live according to the male hormonal rhythm for so long we don’t even question it. Have we ever stepped back to ask if it makes sense to operate our lives this way? Hormonally, each day is a new start for men, so we structure our workdays and social lives thinking only about the day of the week or the time of day. But women’s bodies don’t work that way. Our energy is not static day to day and week to week. Our productivity could be completely different depending on where we are in our 28-day cycle. The time we feel most social isn’t dictated by the time happy hour starts. And while men tend to recharge in the evening, our cocooning period is tied to a certain time of the month.

We’re overlooking a crucial component that governs the moods and emotions of half the population—it’s no wonder women don’t feel that they are thriving as much as they would like to be. The lack of knowledge about women’s biochemistry and cyclical nature extends to the medical community too. As far back as 1995, a paper in Epidemiological Review noted that medical research basically ignores women’s hormonal cycles. This ignorance plays out in the care and treatment we receive.

All too often when we visit the doctor for our symptoms, we are told, “it’s all in your head,” and are sent home to suffer in silence. This treatment is especially common for menstrual issues like fibroids, endometriosis, and dysmenorrhea. As a result, women often are not properly evaluated or diagnosed until years after their symptoms begin. I know. For me, this process took seven years, and I had to bring the diagnosis myself to my doctor to confirm my PCOS, because she never considered it! Sometimes, we’re labeled “chronic complainers,” as evidenced in a study by the American Autoimmune Related Diseases Association, which found that nearly half of people who were eventually diagnosed with an autoimmune disease (remember, 75 percent of people with autoimmune diseases are women) were initially told they were “too concerned about their health.” Think about that phrase for a minute. A 2010 analysis on chronic pain in women found that health care professionals were more likely to dismiss women’s complaints of pain as “emotional, psychogenic, hysterical, or oversensitive.”

Instead of your health issues being taken seriously, you’re told that you’re “hormonal,” that you were dealt the short end of the biological stick, that your treatment options are limited to taking the pill or possibly having surgery, and that ultimately you should just accept that suffering and feeling crappy is your genetic destiny. Can you imagine men being told to be passive, do nothing, and just learn to live with their symptoms? It’s unacceptable that women are relegated to suffering. In her book, Doing Harm: The Truth About How Bad Medicine and Lazy Science Leave Women Dismissed, Misdiagnosed, and Sick, author Maya Dusenbery summed it up succinctly: “Women’s symptoms are not taken seriously because medicine doesn’t know as much about their bodies and health problems. And medicine doesn’t know as much about their bodies and health problems because it doesn’t take their symptoms seriously.”

On the flip side, some physicians are quick to dole out prescriptions—synthetic birth control that hijacks your natural hormonal cycle, antidepressants that alter your neurochemistry, and the list goes on. More than half of all US women are taking at least one prescription medication, and about twenty-six million are taking five or more doctor-ordered meds. And that’s not taking into account the billions and billions of over-the-counter pills, tablets, caplets, gels, and other remedies we take to try to heal the side effects of neglecting our cycles—acne, headaches, exhaustion, weight gain, insomnia, bloating, and more.

Even the new trend toward biohacking—using food, supplements, and more to optimize our well-being—falls short because it doesn’t take our cyclical nature into consideration. Just look at the diet and fitness industry. Can you show me one trendy, well-known diet or workout that’s based on women’s hormonal cycle? That’s because most diet and exercise research has been conducted on men, not women. Check out these sad statistics:

• Women account for only 39 percent of participants in exercise studies.

• When the XX-chromosome crowd does make the cut in sports and exercise research, we are often studied only during the first half of our cycle, when hormone levels are low, or only if we’re taking hormonal birth control.

In fact, women have been historically underrepresented in all health, drug, and biological research. Here’s a quick timeline of some of the most foundational health research and the shocking absence of women.

• The year 1958: A trial on the physical and cognitive changes and chronic diseases that come with natural aging called the Baltimore Longitudinal Study of Aging was launched; for its first twenty years, it included more than one thousand men and exactly zero women. It wasn’t until 1978 that women were added to the roster of participants.

• The year 1973: The first study looking into the effects of estrogen on the prevention of heart disease included 8,341 men and—you guessed it!—no women.

• The year 1982: The landmark Physician’s Health Study reported the now widely held belief that taking low-dose aspirin can lower the risk for heart disease. The only problem? The study tracked 22,071 men and not a single woman.

• The year 1985: By this date, the Public Health Service Task Force on Women’s Health Issues concluded that “the historical lack of research focus on women’s health concerns has compromised the quality of health information available to women as well as the health care they receive.”

Today, we’re still trying to catch up. Why did women get left out of scientific research while men became the standard human representative in clinical trials? There are many reasons, but here are a couple of biggies:

• Men are preferred research subjects. Men have only one biological clock—that simple, rhythmic 24-hour hormonal circadian pattern—while women also have the more complex 28-day cycle. Researchers have argued that it’s easier and less expensive to facilitate for experiments for the male pattern than for women’s hormonal fluctuations.

• A major drug trial on women went tragically wrong. Another factor that played into our exclusion was a sense of needing to protect women’s reproductive processes. Birth defects from the drug thalidomide in the 1960s resulted in the FDA adopting guidelines in 1977 essentially banning women of “childbearing age” from participating in clinical research. These guidelines effectively cut women who weren’t postmenopausal out of the research game.

It wasn’t until 1993 when the National Institutes of Health Revitalization Act attempted to change things by requiring researchers to include women in human studies and to note any results that differed in women compared with men. We’ve made inroads since then, but “progress has been painfully slow—stalling for long periods or sometimes reversing direction—and, consequently, not nearly enough progress has been made,” according to a 2015 review in BMC Women’s Health.

When you realize that our culture’s foundational health research has largely excluded women, it’s easy to grasp why our health issues are sometimes misunderstood and misdiagnosed. The fact that many of the diseases that affect women in greater numbers receive less funding for research compounds the problem. Trying to fit into the boys’ club actually prevents you from being oriented to your own body and from doing self-care in a way that supports your biochemical needs.

The lack of understanding of women’s health issues can feel isolating. In our sessions, when we talk about the issues my clients are having, women often start by saying, “I must be one in a million, because I have this symptom.” And it’s a symptom that I know is actually very common. I let them know they’re not one in a million with their period problem, they’re one of millions struggling alone and unnecessarily confused. The fact is that your problems are not the result of a deficiency in synthetic hormones. The problem is twofold: (1) we don’t talk enough about the epidemic of women’s chronic hormonal problems, and (2) the one-size-fits-all health care, fitness, and life management advice we’re getting doesn’t fit all—it’s designed primarily for the male hormonal ecosystem. The solution is to redefine women’s health care, time management, and our concept of success from a totally female-centered standpoint. That’s the only way you’re going to live your best life. Even if you don’t suffer from any hormonal health issues, honoring your cyclical nature is the only way to take advantage of all the gifts your body inherently offers.

My Hormone Story

I know firsthand how stressful hormonal problems can be. I struggled with them for a decade, and my journey with a debilitating hormonal condition changed my career and my life. My issues started in junior high school. I was a very late bloomer in the puberty department. Even though I was the president and founder of the Period Club, I was the last one in the club to actually start my period. I was almost sixteen when I got my first bleed, although it was brown and not healthy. I went to my gynecologist annually but was offered no diagnosis or explanation for the laundry list of issues I was having. Meanwhile, my symptoms worsened throughout high school and in college. At one point, I tipped the scales at 205 pounds; my face, chest, and back were covered in severe, painful cystic acne; and I hadn’t had my period more than a handful of times in a decade. Things got so bad for me, I couldn’t sleep, I binged on food to deal with fatigue and anxiety, I felt depressed, and I struggled to do basic things like be on time for appointments and stick with plans to go out with friends. I was a mess and felt trapped in my own body. One night when I was suffering with my usual insomnia, I headed to the library at Johns Hopkins, where I was a student, and I came across a brief article in an obstetrics journal about Stein-Leventhal disease, which is now called polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS). As I scanned the symptoms associated with this condition, I recognized myself immediately. “This is it,” I thought!

In my book WomanCode, I described in detail how that discovery prompted me to demand that my gynecologist give me a test to diagnose PCOS—a transvaginal ultrasound along with bloodwork. When the test revealed the telltale signs of PCOS—multiple cysts on both of my ovaries—I finally knew what was causing all of my issues. It suddenly made sense to me that all the diets, exercise, and skin care treatments hadn’t worked for me. My symptoms weren’t caused by my not trying hard enough; my hormonal system was so severely out of tune that no ordinary diet or skin cream was going to help. My prognosis was grim—a lifetime of cystic acne and an increased risk for obesity, diabetes, infertility, heart disease, and cancer. As I sat in stunned silence, the doc dispassionately informed me there was no cure, only a litany of prescriptions—birth control pills to artificially regulate my period, Accutane for acne, Glucophage for insulin problems, Aldactone for hirsutism issues, blood pressure medicine, Clomid when it came time to conceive, and on and on—that I would likely have to take for the rest of my life. The message was clear: go home and suffer quietly.

As I was reeling from the notion of a lifetime of pills and problems, a voice welled up from deep inside, calmly reassuring me: “That’s not your path.” My body was sending me a strong message that there had to be a better way. I didn’t realize it in that moment, but looking back, my body was letting me know I had the power to do something, to change my hormonal situation and create a better future for myself. In that moment, I made the switch from having a passive relationship with my body to becoming a champion for my health and well-being. I was in a fight for my quality of life, literally, and if traditional medicine was going to leave me unsupported, I’d look elsewhere for a remedy. For the next two years, I embarked on an exploratory journey to learn as much as I could from experts in a variety of health specialties, including naturopaths, herbalists, and acupuncturists. I tried elimination diets, candida diets, herbs, and supplements, and nothing worked for me. Although these therapies can provide relief for many conditions, they didn’t heal my hormonal problems. In fact, my condition continued to worsen.

Out of desperation, I went on the pill, but after just ten days I temporarily lost vision in one eye from an ocular migraine and suffered a cardiac episode of low blood pressure and heart palpitations. After medical evaluation, I was told to avoid synthetic birth control. Finally, after exhausting all of the existing treatments, I tapped into my inner strength as a researcher (I had studied biology and wanted to become an ob-gyn) and began looking into the endocrine system, epigenetics, circadian patterns of the body and hormones (chronobiology), and the five-phase theory from Chinese medicine. My findings encouraged me to experiment and create a revolutionary new way of eating that ultimately put my symptoms and condition into remission naturally. This is the basis of the FLO protocol I described in WomanCode, which includes using food to stabilize your blood sugar levels and insulin, reduce cortisol levels, restore microbial balance in the gut, and improve the breakdown of estrogen in the liver.

Within nine months of following this protocol, my period came back, I lost sixty pounds, my skin cleared up, and my mood and life were transformed. I was beyond thrilled with this transformation, but my journey wasn’t over. I needed to find a way to maintain the changes I had made, and I wanted to get in touch with my cyclical nature by reclaiming a female-centered way of living. The Cycle Syncing Method™ was born from these two fundamental needs. The method is based on the extraordinary blueprint for self-care, biohacking, and optimization on every level provided by our cyclical hormonal patterns. The method allows us to stay connected to our feminine energy despite the cultural conditioning that dictates a linear, repetitive way of living. I certainly wish somebody had taught me about my cyclical nature when I was a little girl. Where was the textbook that had this description of our female process?

On the day when you start your first period, you’ll be entering a wondrous, cyclical phase of your life. Your second biological clock becomes activated. Your body’s cyclical nature empowers you with an abundance of gifts and offers a clear road map to take advantage of each of them at the most opportune time. Syncing with your cycle is the simplest, most effective way to enhance your hormonal health and create sustainable success in all areas of your life—career, relationships, sex, and motherhood.

Can you imagine reading something like this when you were a preteen, and the influence it might have had on your self-esteem and sense of how you could thrive in our society? How might information about syncing with your cycle have shaped the way you think about your body, your period, and your hormonal patterns? How might that information have impacted the way you approach every aspect of your life? I’m convinced that living in tune with our cyclical nature is the key to optimal living for women. Honoring yourself as a cyclical being isn’t just about achieving better hormonal health; it can boost every area of your life. I’ve seen this transformation happen to thousands of women around the world. This book is based on the work I’ve been doing for the past two decades at the FLO Living Hormone Center, a first-of-its-kind company dedicated to modernizing menstrual health care. The FLO Living Hormone Center gives women around the world virtual access to products and programs like the MyFLO app that help them evaluate their hormonal problems, track their symptoms, and naturally address their hormone imbalances. And women can talk at length with a hormone coach about their issues and learn about the benefits of getting in sync with their cyclical nature.

SIDE EFFECTS OF SYNCING WITH YOUR CYCLE

• Finding yourself building energy, not draining it

• Finding yourself in the right place at the right time more often

• Feeling really good about who you are

• Feeling good in your body all month

• Feeling powerful and confident

• Having time work for you, rather than twisting yourself around for time

• Feeling less stress, but getting more done

• Effortlessly maintaining a healthy weight

• Deriving more enjoyment from your work

• Feeling aligned with the process of creation

• Not feeling so much pressure to be perfect

• Feeling like your body is a clear channel for your passion and purpose to come through

Living in harmony with your nature makes you healthier, happier, and symptom-free, and allows you to pursue your creative and career passions more successfully and sustainably. Syncing with your cycle is the ultimate biohack for women’s health and success. Like your cycle, this biohack is efficient, elegant, and direct. All you have to do is access what’s already inside you.

Biohacking, Functional Medicine, and the Cycle Syncing Method™—What’s the Difference?

Most women I connect with all have a similar adverse reaction to the term biohacking. There is something about the word that feels invasive, and I think that our collective unconscious wounding around our physical safety has us balk at this term on an emotional level. We don’t want to be hacked into or hack into ourselves. It feels intrusive and violent, acting against the body’s propensities and—possibly—its permission. However, biohacking really is a term that can be used to describe a proactive relationship with your body, its systems, and your health. Let’s reclaim this term, which has tremendous positive advantages, and understand the different types of biohacking available.

Biohacking, in the wellness community, is using devices, supplements, food, and lifestyle modifications to change the performance of an already normally functioning body system with the aim of enhancing physical performance and achievement in other areas of your life. Its goal is to push the limits of what can be achieved in the 24-hour window. On the positive side, biohacking is about trying to increase the performance of the body beyond its points of natural limitation or to respond better to its environment—for example, using caffeine to increase energy or concentration, or using adaptogens to improve its stress response. It can go as far as genetic modification and device implantation in the body. Some of these are necessary, like artificial valve replacements in the heart or robotic limbs, but I’m talking more about the nonessential versions of these, like chips implanted in the body to track your activity. I think it is part of our nature and our culture to continue to figure out how we can outsmart nature’s processes and succeed in spite of our body’s limitations.

Functional medicine involves a variety of testing followed by food and supplement modification to heal a body system that is in crisis, restoring homeostasis so that the body can perform normally. For example, if you have a diagnosis of PCOS or fibroids, there is an imbalance in the endocrine system that needs support. Initial healing work is essential to get your body back to normal endocrine performance. This is a form of biohacking to restore homeostasis and health.

The Cycle Syncing Method™ is about working with your body’s natural processes to both optimize your health and your life without adding anything to the body system. Because you have a second clock, you have an internal code, or “preferred performance pattern,” in your body. All you have to do to feel the best possible way and to live the life you want for yourself is to align with this pattern and support it as much as you can. You don’t have to try to extend your energy in a 24-hour pattern, because you have the expanse of 28 days to play with. When you run out of energy today, you can stop and rest, knowing that you have a whole variety of energy and creativity to play with over the whole month. This form of biohacking is about aligning with your body’s biological rhythms, and it’s much more collaborative, grounding, anxiety-reducing, and embracing of your feminine energy.

Free Your Feminine Energy for Change

Today’s patriarchal society doesn’t really offer a clear space for this powerful female energy that creates continuous change. But you can make space in your own life the way I did—carefully, thoughtfully, intentionally. I let the truth of science guide me. And science shows me that I am designed to be strong, emotionally attuned, analytical, insightful, creative, playful, nurturing, spontaneous, dynamic, and reliable. Only when we learn how to leverage our natural patterns are we able to thrive in our bodies, our careers, and our relationships, so we can live our optimal lives.

When enough women tap into this personal power, we can collaborate and begin to drive change in our culture to reflect our needs and values of sustainability and well-being—increasingly critical issues for a society moving toward increased dependence on technology and increased damage to our environment. As we head into a future in which more women are rising to positions of power, it is more important than ever to make sure our education about how we self-reference and perform self-care matches the truth of our biology and empowers us. We need to give ourselves permission to lead like women and embrace our dynamic energy to help us champion the changes our world so clearly needs.

I’m constantly surprised that every women’s event or conference—whether focused on business or wellness—does not always include panels, segments, or presentations about hormones and mental health, hormones and energy, or hormones and wellness. I’m always so happy when the people in charge of the conference realize this topic has been left out inadvertently and create some space for it. As we include this in our conversations, we shift how we feel about our female biochemistry.

In fact, we live in an amazing time for periods! Millennials and celebrities are opening up on social media and other platforms about their experiences riding the “crimson wave” and are truly breaking down all the bloody barriers that hold us back from knowing how our bodies work and what’s possible for them. But it’s also a fascinating time as next-generation advances in technology—think artificial intelligence (AI), artificial simulation of the menstrual cycle, and “BioBags” to grow babies outside the uterus—seem to be paving the way for a future where life can be created artificially in response to the decline in everyone’s hormonal health. It’s up to us to protect our hormones and our cycles now and for the seven future generations genetically affected by the self-care choices we make today.

This is the conversation we need to have, not the one we got in our severely inadequate sex ed class, not the one about the “curse.” I actually count myself lucky that as a preteen I never got “the talk” from my mom. She never mentioned one word about menstruation to me. But because I didn’t get the talk, I had no preconceived notions about menstruation being dirty or something to be ashamed of. So when I heard about this mysterious monthly visitor for the first time in my sixth-grade class (a few years before Mr. Bing’s biology class), I was absolutely enchanted. “Ah-mazing!” I thought. I couldn’t wait to start having a cycle. My organic reaction to the idea of having a period was utter joy and enthusiasm. I thought of it as a gift, not a curse. That’s the experience I want for you and for all women—to find the joy in our cycles and to use it to heal our symptoms and help us live our best lives.

CHAPTER 2
Break Free from the 24-Hour Clock

The psyches and souls of women also have their own cycles and seasons of doing and solitude, running and staying, being involved and being removed, questing and resting, creating and incubating, being of the world and returning.

—CLARISSA PINKOLA ESTÉS

I think we’re all wired to try to figure out how to be happy. I remember that in my quest for happiness, I stumbled across an important concept: most of us are going about being happy the wrong way. It’s the “have-do-be” concept. Essentially, we believe, as I sure did, that once I had acquired a goal (like the perfect weight, or the right job, or quality friends), then I’d do all the things I wanted to do (like wear a bikini to the beach, have lots of money to spend, go out and do fun things), and then finally I’d be happy! The truth is, however, that the process works in the opposite direction. While I understood this concept intellectually, it was a whole other thing to actually live it. I’m from New England—maybe there is something in the water up there that makes a person want very practical solutions to esoteric questions. I wanted to know how to generate feelings of well-being and enjoyment consistently. It turns out that the answer was waiting for me all along in my biochemistry.

In the previous chapter I revealed how misinformation about our biochemistry is preventing us from taking advantage of the natural competitive edge women possess. In this chapter I’ll unpack a fundamental truth about female biology that most women are ignoring: while children, men, and postmenopausal women are operating on a single biological clock, women of reproductive age are blessed to have two powerful inner clocks that create an organic framework for optimizing our energy, nurturing our creativity, maintaining our health, and making sustainable our productivity. Just as we now appreciate taking serious care of our circadian clock, it is equally critical to take care of your monthly hormonal clock, as you’ll see in this chapter. Honoring both these clocks can help you access the gifts of your cyclical nature so you can optimize your performance and achieve more with less effort and less stress. On the other hand, continuing to ignore your second clock can ravage your health and make it harder for you to experience more flow and ease in your life.

Chronobiology and You

I’ve always been fascinated by chronobiology. It’s the field within biology that seeks to understand the cyclical phenomena in organisms and their adaptation to physiological rhythms. The term comes from the ancient Greek words chronos, the word for time, and bios logia, the study of life. These cycles are known as biological rhythms and they impact anatomy, physiology, genetics, molecular biology, behavior, epigenetics, reproduction, and even our planet’s ecology. Basically, everything is affected by this action of cycles and timing, and yet we don’t get exposed to this perspective when we are learning about basic biology as we’re growing up. Timing is essential for many key biological processes: from sleeping to cellular regeneration and even bacterial activity, its impact on your well-being is enormous. We should all have a basic understanding of the timing of our bodies’ functions.

In addition to most of us not having a strong understanding about this field of study, we usually only hear about one of the timing cycles: the circadian rhythm and its connection to the solar rhythm. Circadian is from the Latin words circa (around) and diem (day), describing the solar cycle of one day. Of course, there are some cultural reasons behind this cycle being so well-known compared to others: the sun, from Greek mythology to modern religion, has always been associated with male power. Unfortunately, due to this patriarchal agenda and the association between the menstrual cycle and lunar rhythms, the menstrual biological rhythm has become culturally devalued to the point where we’re not even taught its proper name.

Well, here it is. Your menstrual cycle is an infradian rhythm, a cycle longer than a day. There are also ultradian rhythms that refer to cycles shorter than a day, like REM cycles and growth hormone cycles. Lunar rhythms are actually a separate cycle, and, from a chronobiological standpoint, they typically refer to tidal activity. The facts that our bodies are 80 percent water and women observe a correlation between their infradian rhythm and their lunar cycle mean that there might be more connection there than we have research for currently. However, because they have been associated together historically and they don’t fit well with religious and patriarchal values, we don’t know much about our biological rhythms, and we ourselves don’t believe they have much value.

But science transcends cultural narratives: what you’re about to learn is a real and missing piece of your understanding of your biology, and as such you can feel confident in reclaiming your hormonal advantage and revolutionizing your life accordingly. We’ve all learned how to orient ourselves around a day and to connect with the timing of the world outside. We need to learn to leverage our infradian rhythm for our success and well-being—we need to learn to connect with our inner timing.

Meet Your 24-Hour Clock—the Circadian Rhythm

Let’s look at your 24-hour clock first. Inside all of us—women and men—we have a circadian rhythm that regulates our daily bodily processes, including digestion, body temperature, metabolism, sleep, elimination, and the production of certain hormones. This circadian clock kicks into action the day you’re born, and continues ticking day in and day out throughout your entire life. Michael Breus, in his book The Power of When, explores how the circadian rhythm reigns over your body’s processes—cuing cortisol to spike in the morning to rev you up, boosting alertness in late morning, and secreting melatonin around 9 p.m. to help you wind down for sleep. Here’s a breakdown of how your 24-hour clock primes your body for a variety of processes throughout the day:

In traditional Chinese medicine, the organs also have peak activity times during the day, and practitioners use this clock to understand which organs need extra support:

A master timekeeper, which is composed of a cluster of about 20,000 neurons, is found in the brain’s hypothalamus and keeps all of these internal processes in sync. For science geeks, this structure is called the suprachiasmatic nucleus, or SCN. Throughout human history, this circadian clock has dictated our daily lives—prompting us to wake when the sun rises and sleep when nighttime falls.

Our modern-day lifestyle, however, is increasingly at odds with our inner clock. Ever since Thomas Edison patented the light bulb in 1879, we’ve lived in a world of never-ending bright light. Want to go dancing until 2 a.m.? Write your screenplay at midnight? Eat dinner at 10 p.m.? No problem. But when our lifestyle doesn’t sync with our circadian clock, it can impact our well-being and has been associated with a litany of physical, mental, and cognitive issues, according to numerous studies. For example, a 2014 paper in International Review of Psychiatry linked circadian misalignment with an increased risk for cardiovascular disease, diabetes, obesity, cancer, depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and ADHD, and research in the Annals of the New York Academy of Sciences found that any disregulation of our circadian clock could potentially trigger metabolic, autoimmune, or mood disorders.

CONDITIONS LINKED TO A CIRCADIAN DISRUPTION INCLUDE THE FOLLOWING:

• Cancer | • Small intestine bacterial overgrowth
• Cardiovascular disease |
• Diabetes | • Depression
• Obesity | • Bipolar disorder
• Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) | • Attention deficit disorder (ADD)
• Inflammatory bowel disease | • Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD)
• Gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD) | • Schizophrenia
• Ulcers | • Lack of alertness
• Gut dysbiosis | • Reduced cognitive function

Our daily timekeeper has been deemed so critical to our health and well-being that three scientists were awarded the 2017 Nobel Prize, the world’s highest scientific honor, for pinpointing the gene that keeps this daily timekeeper ticking. Now that the rest of us understand how important it is to sync with our circadian rhythms, we’re taking action to avoid anything that disrupts our 24-hour clock. We’ve inadvertently deregulated our circadian clock and have gotten to a point where we have to biohack our lives to reverse the damage. Just look at how popular those glasses that filter the blue light from our tech gadgets have become. It’s common knowledge now that the blue light from all our devices is messing with our sleep. But many of us don’t know that blue light diminishes the pineal gland’s ability to make melatonin, which can disrupt ovulation and decrease fertility.

Becoming more aware of how critical it is to live in tune with our circadian clock is great, but women need to understand that we have a second clock that is equally important. Unfortunately, this clock hasn’t received nearly the same amount of attention from the scientific community or the media. In fact, this second clock has been largely ignored, and we’ve been left in the dark about its inner workings and its profound impact on our health, moods, and performance. It’s time to change that.

Say Hello to Your Second Clock—the 28-Day Infradian Rhythm

As a woman, you’re blessed with a second clock, starting at puberty and continuing until you reach menopause at about age fifty. It deeply impacts your experience of life for approximately forty years. This infradian rhythm is tied to your monthly menstrual cycle, which includes four distinct phases—follicular, ovulatory, luteal, and menstrual. The same way your circadian clock plays a role in your daily bodily functions, your 28-day infradian clock influences your brain chemistry and physiology, providing you with unique gifts and strengths at different times of the month.

Your two clocks are tightly linked. The four phases of your cycle influence your 24-hour circadian rhythms, and vice versa. For example, did you know that hormonal fluctuations affect your body temperature, sleep patterns, and heart rate throughout your cycle? On the flip side, your 24-hour clock plays a role in how well your 28-day clock functions. Any disturbance in your 24-hour clock can disrupt your 28-day cycle, leading to problems such as irregular periods and longer menstrual cycles.

As we’ve seen, mountains of research show that living out of sync with your circadian clock can damage your physical and mental health. The same is true if you ignore your monthly cycle. Neglecting this vital inner infradian clock exacts a heavy price from your hormonal, physical, and mental well-being. In addition to the influence of endocrine-disruptive chemical exposure, trying to fit into a 24-hour pattern by ignoring our own hormonal needs is taking a dramatic toll on our bodies. Just look at the numbers:

• Five million women suffer from polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS).

• Seventy to 80 percent of women will develop fibroids by age fifty.

• One in ten of women will suffer from endometriosis during the reproductive years.

• Nine to fourteen out of one hundred women have heavy periods.

• Ten percent of women experience period pain so intense they can’t perform everyday routines.

• Twelve percent of women of reproductive age have difficulty getting pregnant or carrying a pregnancy to term.

• About 600,000 women undergo a hysterectomy every year.

• Women are five to eight times more likely to have thyroid problems.

• More than 75 percent of all people diagnosed with autoimmune diseases are women.

• As many as 50 million women suffer from one or more neglected chronic pain conditions.

• Women are twice as likely as men to have chronic fatigue syndrome.

• Women account for up to 90 percent of all people with fibromyalgia.

• Eighty-five percent of chronic migraine sufferers are women.

• About two-thirds of Alzheimer’s disease patients are women.

• Women in their childbearing years are more than twice as likely as men to develop an anxiety disorder.

• One in eight women experience depression in their lifetime, twice the rate as men.

For optimal health and performance, you need to learn as much as you can about your second clock and then nurture it with phase-specific self-care. Syncing with your monthly clock is the key to taking full advantage of your cyclical nature for the three to four decades when it forms the foundation of your life. Before puberty and after menopause, it’s your circadian clock and static hormonal pattern that guide the rhythm of your life and allow you to engage in more gender-neutral biohacking. During your reproductive years, however, you need to biohack like a woman.

A Better Way to Think About Time

When you have two biological clocks, you also need to rethink your relationship with time and time management. Are you struggling to balance career, family, friends, volunteer work, workouts, and self-care? Are you constantly stressed trying to wade through your to-do list? Do you feel like there aren’t enough hours in the day to get it all done? Want to stop worrying about time, get more done, and actually enjoy what you’re doing? The secret lies in timing your life with your second clock in mind rather than simply adhering to the 24-hour clock.

I know what you’re thinking. Sounds too good to be true. We’re all tired of the media telling us we can “have it all,” when we’re just trying to get through each day intact. I understand. I’ve got a lot on my plate: I’m a mom, a wife, a daughter, a business owner, an author, and a speaker. I have a vital self-care practice. I love to cook. I love to read. I can easily get overwhelmed by my to-do list. The fact is that the “you can have it all” credo is steeped in the conditioning that women must “do it all” to earn love, acceptance, and security in our patriarchal society. In a culture that ignores the wisdom of our second clock, what else could we expect? However, when you yourself insist in your own life that you orient everything you do around your 28-day clock, the pressure to do it all and have it all simply drops away. Rushing in to fill the place of that pressure are discernment, desire, and an increased quality of life. Before I incorporated my second clock in my life, if I had a major deadline or project due, I would just push myself to the point of misery and exhaustion to get it done and deal with the health consequences afterward. After I started orienting my life around my second clock, I changed my approach; for example, when I came back on the speaking circuit following the birth of my daughter, I’d schedule those talks only during my ovulatory phases to make sure I didn’t burn myself out too quickly.

This change is not some big thing—it’s a million little moments when you include your female reality in the choices you make, reclaim your sovereignty, and increase your enjoyment and well-being. I know for a fact that I couldn’t perform at a high level, or attempt to accomplish all that I do, if I weren’t managing my time and energy in a cyclical fashion. Before I realized I had to honor my second clock, my hormonal problems had drained my energy to the point where I was barely able to accomplish the basics of daily living. Just getting off the couch to go to a doctor’s appointment required a monumental effort. After years of syncing with my cycle, I’ve learned how to plan ahead to stay in a peak flow state as much as possible. I prime my body with cycle-specific self-care and schedule my days, weeks, months, and year with the four phases of my cycle in mind. I hold brainstorming meetings on the days when my creative energy is highest. I slot my speaking engagements for the dates when communication skills are on point. I tackle detail-oriented tasks during those times when awareness and attention are locked in. I take stock of how I’m doing and where I’m heading in the phase when changes in my neurochemistry encourage self-analysis. Most important, this practice demands that I make choices continually about what works for me and what doesn’t. Making these choices is a huge departure from what I had been conditioned to believe, which is simply that I should do everything asked of me at all times. It’s not realistic or healthy to have so few boundaries that there is no room left in your life for yourself, your dreams, or your desires.

Let me give you another example of what cycle syncing looks like in my life. In the days before my period, my energy turns inward and I’m less inclined to socialize, start new projects, or power through my to-do list. What do I do? Instead of stressing about how to squeeze it all in, I do something that feels pretty rebellious to me: I glance at my list, pick the two or three things that absolutely must get done, and move the rest to another day. That’s right. I cross them off the list. Yes, it can feel a little scary to jump off the hamster wheel when we’re so conditioned to always do more, but with that one move, I go from super-stressed to relaxed. With less on my list, I’m able to get in the groove on those few very important things. And those tasks I crossed off my list have been shifted to a day when my cycle naturally fills me with more energy and more ability to tackle them.

As a result, I find myself in the flow on a routine basis. It feels like I’m doing less—remember, I crossed things off my to-do list—but I’m achieving more because I’m focusing my efforts and supporting myself physically. I’m more creative and more optimistic, rather than feeling overwhelmed. On days when I do feel like I’m dragging, I know it’s because I’m out of sync with my cycle, and it’s time for triage. I boost my self-care with strategies you’ll discover in upcoming chapters to help me fly through any challenging days. Most important, I look at how choices I made, and boundaries I didn’t support, left me feeling burned out.

Tuning in to my cycle opened my eyes to a whole new female-centered way of thinking about time that allows me to achieve more of what I want and enjoy the process along the way by protecting my energy. But if you’re like most of the women I’ve helped over the past seventeen years, your inner dialogue reflects your single-clock lifestyle and its implications for your physical and emotional health. In addition to telling me about their hormonal health issues, women also fill me in on their daily life challenges. You can probably relate to some of the following things I hear on a regular basis.

Check any of the following phrases that sound like you.[fn1]

“There aren’t enough hours in the day.”

“My anxiety is through the roof.”

“Sometimes it’s hard to stay focused.”

“I’m overwhelmed by my schedule.”

“I feel like I’m short-changing my kids.”

“I feel frazzled.”

“I don’t have the energy to do it all.”

“I don’t have enough time for my relationships.”

The problem isn’t a lack of time. Ignoring your second clock is draining your energy. The secret to achieving more actually lies in doing less. It’s almost a radical thought in our society, which forces the more-is-better philosophy down our collective throats. The idea of less can seem downright treasonous. But it’s backed by science. It’s time to let go of these old patterns and get in tune with a female-centered productivity paradigm that’s based on your biology.

Stop Ignoring Your Second Clock

You’ve been culturally conditioned to unconsciously believe some truly flawed philosophies about time. Let’s look at the biggest culprits and cyclical flow blockers and break them down one by one.

FLO Blocker 1:
You’re watching only one clock

Time to wake up! Time to go to work! Time for dinner! In our society, we’re all chained to the ticking clock. Most of the women who come to me for help with their period problems also suffer from the effects of trying to keep up with the daily grind. Because they aren’t living in harmony with their inner cycle, their hormonal systems are crying out for help. When you’re dealing with painful periods, headaches, and PMS, it’s so much harder to succeed in the male-patterned world where productivity is king. We begin to think we suck at time management.

Our entire concept of time is predicated on the male-patterned 24-hour cycle—a straight shot to an end point. It’s time to kick that concept to the curb. Instead of thinking about time in typical chronological fashion, it’s time to adopt something I call right-timing. The idea is to do things at the right moment, not necessarily sequentially. That daunting to-do list of yours? Instead of adding task after task in no particular order, think about the best time—what the ancient Greeks called kairos—for each item, and group your tasks based on the strengths of the phase of your cycle. An upcoming chapter gives specifics on how to do so and provides you with a daily planner geared to help you include both your clocks in your planning.

Ultimately, when you’re syncing with your cycle, you can stop trying to master time and start thinking about managing your energy. This subtle but powerful shift in your thought process will pay off in a big way. The concept is already catching on in the corporate world. In a 2007 Harvard Business Review article, some forward-thinking leaders at global consultancy firm The Energy Project explored the effects of managing energy versus time. They wrote, “The core problem with working longer hours is that time is a finite resource. Energy is a different story.” They’ve found that replacing energy-depleting behaviors with self-care practices that recharge and reenergize is the key to sustainable high performance without burnout. I’ve taken this finding one step further to show that these energy-building strategies are naturally built into your biochemistry and must be managed differently for women in their reproductive years.

Here’s what I mean. Think of the male-energy paradigm based on a 24-hour clock as a hockey puck being pushed across the ice. The puck accelerates, decelerates, and eventually comes to a stop. This is the energy paradigm we’ve been conditioned to adopt: you go as hard as you can, as long as you can, and then crash. The female energy paradigm, based on the 28-day cycle, is cyclical. Which, like a wheel, is arguably more powerful and efficient. When you stabilize it and give it a push, it accelerates and gains speed, gathering momentum naturally as it rolls. In fact, the industrial revolution was powered by cyclical machinery, prized for its ongoing efficiency! This is how your body is intended to work. When you intentionally and strategically support the four phases of your cycle instead of simply pushing through your agenda each day, you’ll be gaining energy rather than draining it. Syncing with your cycle keeps you engaged, and you’ll arrive at your desired destination faster and might even go farther than you originally intended. Your schedule becomes a reflection of your natural strengths, allowing you to get in the flow and perform at your best.

FLO Blocker 2:
You’re living in perpetual productivity

With right-timing, everything has an ideal moment. I learned about that natural rhythm of life in Mr. Bing’s biology class when I had to observe a tree from winter to spring bloom. We are meant to live our lives in rhythm with this cycle of creation—from seed to growth to harvest to rest.

Natural Cycle of Creation

Our culture, however, demands perpetual growth and harvest. Trying to live your life in nonstop growth and harvest mode is taxing for your endocrine system. The message that you need to be in constant production mode puts you in an impossible situation. You are pressured to strive for peak productivity at all times, ignoring your natural rhythm. You feel the need to do more even though your performance falters, your health fails, and your psyche suffers. This relentless pursuit of productivity—at work, at home, and in your relationships—forces you to put yourself last on your to-do list, if you even make it onto your list at all. Self-care goes out the window. You skip lunch, you skimp on sleep, you fuel yourself with double lattes. These make your endocrine system go haywire, and once one of your hormones is disrupted, a cascade of imbalances and a laundry list of symptoms can follow. You can find yourself living with chronic stress, adrenal fatigue, anxiety, insomnia, and more. In a vicious circle, these conditions compound any existing hormonal dysfunction. And somehow, you’re supposed to keep producing at top speed anyway. How is anyone supposed to function, let alone thrive, this way?

I’m reminded of something I’ve heard Oprah say, that life will tap you on the shoulder until it knocks you on your butt. Too many of us have been knocked on our butts. I think Oprah would agree: everything in the right season!

FLO Blocker 3:
You believe being busy is a status symbol or a badge of honor

When I ask women who come to the center, “How are you?,” they often answer with something along the lines of “I’m so busy, it’s crazy.” Think about that answer for a moment. We’re so divorced from our feelings that we can’t even give an emotional, let alone human, response to a simple question. Instead, we provide a productivity update to connect and commiserate with others. We’ve been conditioned to believe that the more tasks and activities we have jam-packed into each day, the more valuable we are. That was the conclusion of a 2017 study in the Journal of Consumer Research, which found that a busy and overworked lifestyle has become “an aspirational status symbol.” We’re basing our personal expectations on what our digital tools—computers, cell phones, and other gadgets that can operate 24/7—can do. It’s as if we’re aspiring to become machines that never power down.

The trend is taking a toll on our health and performance. In her book, Overwhelmed: Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time, Bridget Schulte dissects how the cult of busyness is leaving us feeling fractured, scattered, and mentally and physically exhausted. We’re all jettisoning ourselves from one task to the next, barely taking a moment to breathe. And women may be more susceptible to this, considering our days can be even more jam-packed than men’s. Melinda Gates addressed the issue of “time poverty” in the 2016 annual letter from the Gates Foundation. She singled out the gender gap in the number of hours we devote to unpaid work—think grocery shopping, kitchen duty, and carting the kids around. Statistics show that globally women spend an average of 4.5 hours a day on unpaid work, while men skate by performing much less than half that amount. She wrote, “Unless things change, girls today will spend hundreds of thousands more hours than boys doing unpaid work simply because society assumes it’s their responsibility.”

Racing through our to-do lists also leaves no time for restorative, relaxing activities. According to the US Department of Labor, men spend thirty-three more minutes per day socializing, engaging in exercise, or watching TV than women do. In a year, this adds up to more than two hundred fewer hours of leisure time for women. No wonder we’re exhausted!

A growing number of doctors and scientists are finding that our overscheduled days are leading to difficulty concentrating, inability to focus, irritability, sleep issues, mental fatigue, physical wear and tear, and more. Suzanne Koven, an internal medicine physician at Massachusetts General Hospital, hit the nail on the head in a 2013 column in the Boston Globe when she declared that busy is the new sick. “In the past few years, I’ve observed an epidemic of sorts: patient after patient suffering from the same condition. The symptoms of this condition include fatigue, irritability, insomnia, anxiety, headaches, heartburn, bowel disturbances, back pain, and weight gain. There are no blood tests or X-rays diagnostic of this condition, and yet it’s easy to recognize. The condition is excessive busyness.”

This is yet another detrimental effect of living in a society that values relentless productivity more than anything else. Being busy has emerged as the modern-day hero’s journey. In mythology, the hero’s journey centers on a person heading out on an adventure, facing an obstacle, claiming victory, and returning home a transformed person. Today’s hero’s journey revolves around endless tasks and efficient production, hour after hour. Sound familiar? It should. Remember that description from my biology textbook:

The testes are powerhouses of efficient production. They produce two to three hundred million spermatozoa daily …

If you’re wondering where our society came up with these values, look no further than a man’s biology. Seriously! This concept of never-ending production mimics the semen production that takes place in the testicles. It’s no surprise that the way we formed our society is based on what we’ve studied most, which is the male body. We high-five goal achievement and project completion, but we don’t reward rest, rejuvenation, or enjoying the ride.

FLO Blocker 4:
You believe success requires suffering

Thanks to trailblazing women, young girls today believe they can be whatever they want to be—president of the United States, an astronaut, a tech CEO, you name it. Anything a man can do, we can do bleeding. We’ve proven without a doubt that we can do anything. I would just like to see women doing whatever they want without incurring unnecessary health expense. I would like them to have a framework in which they feel supported deeply. Don’t get me wrong—working hard for a goal is a very good thing. But what if we could incorporate, from the start, the lessons many learned too late in life, that compromising isn’t worth the cost? Women wholeheartedly buy into the belief that we have to suffer in order to succeed—in a way similar to the way we’ve been conditioned to think we are destined to endure physical pain because of our biochemistry. It’s sadistic to think this way. It’s time to realize you don’t have to suffer from physical ailments, nor do you have to damage your health, relationships, or mental well-being in pursuit of success.

The same way you trim some tasks from your schedule, you may want to readjust your concept of success and productivity. Does productivity equal success? If you have to give up all the things you love in order to rise up the corporate ladder or reach a goal, is it really a win? If your endless pursuit of an objective makes you physically ill—think chronic stress, gut issues, or high blood pressure—is it really an achievement? If you’re riddled with anxiety or wracked with worry from constantly pushing, is it really worth it? What are you really trying to accomplish, what void are you trying to fill with this nonstop pursuit?

In Buddhism, there’s a concept known as the hungry ghost. I think of the hungry ghost as a sort of black hole within that can never be filled. In our culture, people chase goal after goal or acquire shiny new thing after shiny new thing, but feel increasingly empty inside. In Alain de Botton’s seminal book Status Anxiety, he describes this constant pursuit of more as a need for love. No matter what people achieve or how much they possess, they still want more. They buy their first condo but still yearn for the big house with the yard. They land a promotion at work but are already plotting their next career move. They lose ten pounds but feel bad that they didn’t lose twenty. You probably know plenty of women like this—you could be one of them yourself. Take heart. There’s a better way.

FLO Blocker 5:
You expect to feel the same every day

One of the things that blocks your ability to access the gifts of your second clock is the expectation that you should be a static creature. You’re not. You’re a dynamic being. Like the rest of our body’s biochemistry, our emotional energy levels expand outward and then retract inward in a natural rhythm throughout our cycle. Sometimes we’re more social and communicative, other times we’re more introspective and have a desire to be a homebody. Our society values outward energy more than inward energy, so we tend to think we’re being lazy if we putter around the house or that we’re self-indulgent if we focus on ourselves. But these ebbs and f lows in energy aren’t about you being lazy. Feeling withdrawn can be a powerful signal from your cycle to focus inward and take extra care of yourself.

We all have this expectation that we should be able to perform the same way every day so beaten into our heads that when I tell the women who come to me for help that respecting our fluctuations is key to getting in sync, they give me one of those sideways glances. In all my years of health consulting, I’ve found this to be one of the hardest concepts for women to adopt. I have to reassure them that it’s okay—make that great—for them to take a break from the grind to check in on personal well-being. In fact, it’s mandatory that you rest after a crazy productive period.

FLO Blocker 6:
You have a hormonal imbalance or are taking the pill

I’ve said it before, but it bears repeating: if you have period problems, PMS, bloating, cramping, or other issues with your menstrual cycle, or if you’re taking synthetic birth control, you won’t be able to fully access the gifts of your second clock. It’s important to address your hormonal health. The Biohacking Tool Kit will help you if you need period support.

YES, YOU CAN DO LESS. SERIOUSLY!

If you’re thinking the concept of doing less is impossible in your deadline-driven world, think again. I work with a lot of high-powered female executives, business owners, and college students who tend to respond, “Yeah, right,” when I tell them about this radical shift in perception. Let me show you more clearly how it can work. When I returned from a recent business trip, I had twenty things on my to-do list. I looked at the arc of my month and thought about what would give me maximum efficiency and creativity while allowing me to maintain a high level of self-care. I also evaluated my task list and carefully curated what was really worth doing based on what would be most enjoyable and rewarding. Most important, I actively ignored the inner voice that said I needed to do everything to get ahead and to do it now. Then I parsed out my task list and mapped it onto my cycle phase by phase. Suddenly, it all seemed infinitely more doable, and I went from feeling overwhelmed to feeling energized.

The Cyclical Secret: Use Your Second Clock

After working for close to two decades with women who are suffering from hormonal breakdown and struggling with their careers, relationships, and motherhood, I’ve realized their struggles are largely the result of their not factoring in their second clock in a meaningful way. Syncing with your cycle will not only help you overcome your period problems, but also give you the foundation to thrive in every area of your life. When you reframe your understanding of your body’s biochemistry and start incorporating your second clock, you can stop pressuring yourself to be in perpetual growth or harvest, stop struggling to manage chronological time, and start pursuing your goals in a sustainable way that makes you feel empowered and confident. And when you approach life from your own inner timing, you will naturally find your way to peak performance that helps you build energy and enhance your health and wellness, not drain them. You’ll unlock your creativity, find more pleasure in your relationships, and feel more fulfilled.

Seeing how much of an asset your second clock is, and how ignoring it has cost you so much from a physical, emotional, and even spiritual point of view, can be upsetting. Or this understanding could fill you with excitement and hope, knowing there is a clear answer to your quiet question: “Isn’t there a better way?” You may have a visceral reaction—positive or negative—to this information. My advice is to take these feelings and channel them into a new way of living based on the scientific facts surrounding your biology. You don’t have to wait for a major societal shift to take advantage of your natural timing, gifts, and talents. You can start today by setting your compass to your true north, and getting in sync with your body’s monthly cycle and natural rhythms. I know it can feel overwhelming to make changes on your own, so I’ve created free resources where you can get in the FLO with all the support you need at www.IntheFLObook.com/bonus.

Remember, finding your way to doing less, achieving more, and being happier isn’t just about you. Every time you take up the space you need in your life—for example, allowing yourself to cross something off your to-do list, giving yourself permission to rest and rejuvenate after a busy stretch of time, or planning your day based on your energy rather than your time—it heals your soul and chips away at our cultural conditioning. And it provides an example for other women—our sisters, friends, and daughters. By sharing what we’re learning about our bodies, we can start building a global community of women living in tune with our biochemistry. And this female reclamation will continue to grow until the revolution is undeniable.

GETTING IN THE FLO

Want to start practicing the art of doing less, achieving more, and managing your energy so you can get in the FLO? Try these simple cyclical hacks:

1. Take stock at the end of the day: How’s your energy? Do you feel exhausted and drained, or invigorated, like you’ve had a great workout?

2. Keep track of how often you say yes when you really mean no. Boundaries become a problem when you don’t fit yourself on your own schedule.

3. Take one thing a day off your to-do list and resist the urge to fill that space with something else to do.

4. Dare to do nothing for half an hour or engage in a small pleasure—take a hike, make a phone call, or catch up with a friend.

5. List three things you can do besides work.

6. When somebody asks you, “How are you?,” try answering with an emotional answer—“I’m feeling great today,” or even “I’m feeling energized today”—not the default setting, “I’m so busy.”

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