Praise for Fiona McArthur:

‘The entire story

(SURVIVAL GUIDE TO DATING YOUR BOSS)

is liberally spiced with drama, heartfelt emotion and just a touch of humour.’

—RT Book Reviews

Gold Coast Angels:
Two Tiny Heartbeats
Fiona McArthur

www.millsandboon.co.uk

MILLS & BOON

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Dedicated to my cousin John, who is toughing it out, so proud of you, and to Aunty Yvonne, Lee, who is also awesome, Gay and Eveline.

Table of Contents

Cover

Praise for Fiona McArthur

Title Page

Dedication

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Copyright

Dear Reader

I’ve loved being a part of the Gold Coast Angels series, and can’t wait to catch up with all the amazing people who work there.

My heroine, Lucy, is ready to take on the world. She’s a dedicated midwife, of course, and loves her job—until she finds out she is going to be a single mother with twins.

Without support of family, Lucy would be finding it even tougher without the warmth and caring of her work friends—and that’s where Gold Coast City Hospital comes into its own.

But it’s gorgeous Dr Nikolai Kefes who really takes her under his gorgeous wing (those shoulders…!), and Lucy discovers that she’s not the only person who has someone special missing in her life. Can she heal Nikolai’s past hurts and make this wonderfully caring doctor love again?

I hope you have as much fun as I did with Nick and Lucy’s love life—enjoy the Gold Coast Angels series.

Warmest wishes

Fiona McArthur

CHAPTER ONE

LUCY PALMER WAS so excited even the ride up in the lift made her feel queasy. She’d thought she’d grown out of that.

Today, officially, she could say she was a part of the state-of-the-art Gold Coast City Hospital and she’d done it all herself. Her excitement had been building since graduation fourteen weeks ago.

This wasn’t just three years of hard study and unpaid practical placements, this was the start of a mission she’d lived and breathed for ever.

Lucy couldn’t wait to be allocated her first birth suite caseload because she was going to be the best midwifery grad they’d ever seen.

The midwifery floor manager, Flora May, ex-air force medic with a gruff voice and, Lucy suspected, a well-camouflaged heart of gold, had met Lucy in one of her placements during her training. Flora’s assessment of Lucy’s aptitude for the profession had helped very much in her successful interview and Lucy couldn’t have asked for a better role model than Flora.

As the orientation tour ended Flora snapped her heels together and waved to the busy floor. Unexpectedly her angular face changed and she smiled with genuine warmth.

‘And welcome, Palmer. I’ve given you Monday to Friday shifts for the first month, so I’ll be here if you need advice.’

A friendly face while she settled in. Lucy decided that sounded blissful. ‘Thank you.’

‘Hmph.’ Sentiment should be set aside, obviously, Lucy thought with an internal smile as Flora went on. ‘Take Sally Smith, she’s a teen mum admitted for threatened premature labour at thirty-three weeks. She needs someone she can relate to.’

This was accompanied by a dry look. ‘Night staff will give you Sally’s handover in birth suite one.’ Flora raised an eyebrow. ‘You’ll be fine. Let me know if you need help and I’ll be your wing man. Any questions, find me.’

The boss would be her wing man? Lucy grinned at the funny wordage and resisted the urge to salute.

Flora marched off and Lucy felt for the first time that someone other than her fellow ex-students was willing to believe she had the makings of a good midwife.

It would have been nice if her mother had been supportive instead of bitter and twisted, but she wasn’t going there because nothing was going to spoil this day. Or her confidence, because Flora believed she could do this well.

Her stomach fluttered uncomfortably again and she sucked in a breath. Forget nerves, this was what she’d been born for.

When she knocked and entered the first birth suite and the night midwife didn’t look up from writing her notes, Lucy faltered, felt tempted to cough or go back and knock again, but she didn’t.

The pale young woman lying curled on her side blinked so Lucy stepped just inside the door and smiled, but the girl on the bed rolled her eyes, and then looked away before shutting them. Tough room, Lucy thought ruefully before, with another deep breath, she crossed to the bed.

The night midwife still didn’t look up, so Lucy passed her by and smiled at her patient as she tried to imagine what it would be like to be seventeen, pregnant, and now scared her baby would be born prematurely, in a place where she knew no one.

‘Hello, Sally, I’m Lucy. I’ll be looking after you today when your night midwife goes home.’ Lucy glanced around the otherwise empty room, and no boyfriend or mother was tucked into any corner she could see. Maybe Sally’s mother had trained in the same school as hers, Lucy thought, and she knew how that felt. Lack of family support was not fun at all.

The young mum-to-be opened her eyes briefly, nodded, and then rolled carefully over onto her other side, stretching the leads that held the monitor on her stomach.

Really tough room, Lucy thought with a gulp.

Finally the night midwife put down her pen and looked across. ‘I’m Cass. I’ve just done my fifth night shift and can’t wait to get out of here.’

Lucy blinked and glanced at Sally’s rigid back. Not a very nice intro, she thought, or what Lucy expected from a hospital she’d only ever heard praise about.

To make it worse, Cass didn’t look at anything except her notes or, occasionally, the graph of contractions on the machine. ‘So this is Sally, seventeen, thirty-three weeks, first baby, and has had intermittent back pain since three this morning. No loss on the pad she’s wearing and the CTG is picking up the contractions as five-minutely.’

The lack of emotion sat strangely in a room where emotion was usually a big factor and Lucy began to suspect why Flora May had sent her in here. Lucy wanted to care for Sally, not treat her like an insect in a jar.

Cass sighed as if the story would never end and Lucy wished the midwife would just go home and let her read the notes herself. But of course she couldn’t say that, especially on her first day. But she was feeling less timid by the second. Something she’d discovered inside herself when she’d discovered midwifery.

Then Cass went one worse. ‘The foetal fibrinectin test for prem labour couldn’t be done because she’s had sex in the last twenty-four hours.’

Brutal. Lucy saw Sally’s shoulder stiffen and winced in sympathy for the callousness of a clinical handover that lacked sensitivity. Lucy vowed she’d never be like this. And now she seriously wished the other midwife gone.

Cass certainly didn’t notice and went on in the same bored tone as she read from her notes. ‘No urinary symptoms or discharge but we’ve sent swabs and urine away for microscopy.’

Okay, Lucy understood that she needed to know it had been done, because infection was the most common reason for early labour and miscarriage.

Cass went on. ‘She’s had three doses of oral tocolytic, which has slowed the contractions, been started on antibiotics four-hourly, and the foetal heart trace…’ She glanced at the long strip of paper cascading from the monitor that evaluated baby heart rate and uterine contractions without looking at the patient. Lucy hated impersonal technology. It was too easy for staff to look more at machines than the patient.

Cass shrugged. ‘I think she’s more stable than when she arrived. First dose of steroids was given at three-thirty a.m., so she’s due another that time tomorrow morning, if she’s still here.’

Cass looked up. ‘Any questions?’

No way did she want to prolong Cass’s stay. Where did you not learn your people skills? Lucy thought, but instead she asked, ‘What time did the doctor last see Sally?’

‘It’s all in the notes.’ Cass glanced down. ‘The registrar at four a.m., but her obstetrician, Dr Kefes…’ For the first time some emotion heightened the colour on Cass’s face and she looked almost feline. ‘Nikolai’s delicious.’ She sighed as if he was there in front of her and Lucy cringed.

‘Nikolai will see her at rounds this morning. He’s always punctual at eight so be ready. I’m off.’ She snapped shut the folder and uncoiled herself from the chair. ‘Bye, Sally.’ She handed the folder to Lucy and left without waiting for her patient’s reply.

Lucy frowned at the door as it shut, decided even the mention of the doctor as delicious was unprofessional, glanced around for inspiration on winning Sally’s confidence after the nurse from hell had departed, and set about changing the dynamics of the room.

She spotted a little black four-wheeled stool and pulled it around to the other side of the bed to see her patient’s face before sitting down.

The stool brought her not too close but just under the level of Sally’s eyes so she wasn’t crowding or looking down at her. After a few moments Sally opened her eyes. ‘So how are you feeling, Sally?’

‘Crap.’

Lucy smiled. Succinct. ‘Fair enough. Can you be more specific? Your back?’ Sally nodded and Lucy continued, ‘Worse or better than when you came in?’

‘A lot worse.’ Sally blinked suspiciously shiny eyes and Lucy wanted to hug her. Instead, she considered their options.

‘Okay, that’s not good. Let’s sort that first. I’ll take the monitor off for a few minutes while I check your observations, and have a little feel of your tummy before we put the belts back on more comfortably. Then we’ll see if we can relieve some of the discomfort.’

Lucy glanced at the little watch that her friends had all pitched in for her on graduation. Pretty and practical, like her, they’d said, and she still winced because they’d known her mother wouldn’t show for the event and she’d be disappointed.

That might even have been why she’d made that dumb choice with Mark after one too many unfamiliar mojitos, but it had been nice to bask in appreciation for a change.

She shook off regrets because they were a waste of time. She’d learnt that one the hard way by watching her mother.

Seven-thirty a.m., so she had half an hour before the obstetrician arrived to assess her patient’s condition. Lucy wanted an overall picture of Sally’s general health and mental state before then. But mostly she wanted Sally to feel comfortable with her so she could best represent her concerns when more new caregivers arrived. She’d better get started.

Nikolai Kefes, Senior Obstetrician at Gold Coast City Hospital, discreetly named Adonis by his female colleagues, had a strong work ethic. Seventy per cent of his life centred on work, twenty per cent went to his sister, Chloe, and the other ten per cent was divided equally between sport and brief affairs with sophisticated women.

Nick hated being late for ward rounds but there was no way he could have ignored the distress call from his sister, and by the time he’d parked his car at the hospital it was half an hour after he’d expected to start.

Chloe worried him. She had worried him since she was sixteen and in more trouble than he could have imagined, so much so that she’d changed both their lives. But he could never regret giving her the support she needed when she needed it.

Not that she’d always appreciated his attempts to shield her from the hardships that arose when two young people were suddenly cast out in the world without a penny. He still cringed to think how she would have survived if he hadn’t followed her.

It was a shame their parents hadn’t felt the same, but he’d given up trying to fathom them years ago.

But this morning Chloe had been adamant she would do things her way, despite this last disastrous relationship, and he wished she’d just swim to the surface and avoid becoming involved for a while.

He could only be glad he was in control of his own brief affairs. Short and sweet was not just a concept, more like a mantra for his life, because emotion was best left out of it. That way nobody got hurt.

The lift doors opened and he stepped out on the maternity floor. His eyes narrowed as he noted the arrival of his registrar at the nurses’ station just ahead of him. If he wasn’t mistaken, Simon had got dressed in a hurry, because his shirt showed the inside seams and the shadow of a pocket.

He guessed he should be thankful the majority of his own nights were left undisturbed at this stage of his career, so he smiled, and cleared his mind of everything but his work. The familiar focus settled over him and his shoulders relaxed as he zeroed in on his junior.

‘So, Simon. Tell me what’s happening this morning.’ He paused, looked him up and down and smiled. ‘Then perhaps you could retire into the staffroom and turn your shirt the other way?’

Eight thirty-five a.m. In the past fifteen minutes Lucy had decided Sophie would definitely have her baby today. Around eight-fifteen the contractions had become strong and regular and Lucy had slipped out and rung the registrar because the eight a.m. arrival of the consultant hadn’t occurred.

Neither had the arrival of the registrar, Lucy fumed, and twenty minutes’ time lag wasn’t good enough. She wasn’t happy as she looked for Flora May again to let her know her patient still hadn’t been seen.

Instead, she saw a tall, very athletic-looking man arrive at the desk, his immaculate suit dark like his short wavy hair, but it was his air of command that convinced Lucy he could be the person she expected. She diligently ignored the fact he was probably the most handsome man she’d ever seen and that maybe the horrible night midwife hadn’t been far off.

‘Dr Kefes?’

Both men turned to face her but she went straight for the one who obviously held the power.

‘Yes?’ His voice was low with a husky trace of an accent that was delightfully melodious, Mediterranean most likely, but she’d think about that later when she had a chance.

‘I’m sorry to interrupt. I’m the midwife looking after Sally Hill. She’s seventeen years old and thirty-three weeks gestation in prem labour. I believe she’s establishing active labour as we speak and you need to see her now.’ She handed him the notes and said over her shoulder, ‘This way, please.’

As he opened the notes and followed, Nikolai wondered briefly why he had allowed himself to be steered so determinedly when he usually had handover by his registrar and then did his rounds.

Of course, the young midwife seemed concerned, so that was a good reason, and she had made it difficult for him to refuse, he thought with an internal smile as he watched her reddish-brown ponytail swing in front of him.

He was more used to deference and suggestion than downright direction, but this day had started unusually, and it seemed it was going to proceed that way.

Ten minutes later Lucy stood beside the bed as she watched Dr Kefes and the respectful way he talked to Sally, and she could feel the ease of the tension in her own shoulders.

Thankfully, he was totally opposite from the way the night midwife had been. This tall man with the accent seemed genuinely empathetic with the young mum’s concerns and symptoms. Even the tricky business of the physical examination was conducted with delicacy and tact.

Afterwards Nikolai removed his gloves and washed his hands then came back to the bed, where Lucy had helped Sally to sit up more comfortably. The two young women watched his face anxiously.

Dr Kefes smiled. ‘It seems your baby has decided to have a birthday today. You are more than half-dilated and we will let the special care nursery know to expect a new arrival.’

Sally’s face whitened and the first real fear showed in her eyes. He sat down on Lucy’s stool and smiled gently at the young mum. ‘This is a shock to you?’

Sally nodded but didn’t speak. Lucy could see her lip trembling and she reached across and put her hand out. To her relief Sally grabbed her fingers and clung on while the doctor addressed her fears.

‘You are in a safe place. Your baby is in a safe place. If you are worried, listen to your midwife.’ He gestured at Lucy. ‘This one, who was so determined I would see you first she practically dragged me in here before my round began.’

He smiled at Lucy and she could feel her cheeks warm with embarrassment, and something else, like pleasure that this gorgeous man had complimented her on her advocacy. But the best result was that Sally smiled as well.

He went on. ‘We will all work towards this being a very special day for you and your baby.’ He stood up. ‘Okay?’

Sally nodded, and Lucy could tell she wasn’t the only person in the room who had decided Nikolai Kefes was a man to put your faith in.

And Sally’s birthing was special. Her baby was born three hours later. Dr Kefes was gentle and patient, and Sally was focused and determined to remain in control.

Lucy had borrowed the ward camera and captured some beautifully touching shots soon after the birth, because the neonatal staff were there for the baby, Dr Kefes managed the actual delivery, Flora May unobtrusively supervised, and she didn’t have much to do herself.

The stylish bob of the neonatal specialist, Dr Callie Richards, swung as she paused and spoke to Sally while her staff wheeled tiny Zac out the door on the open crib towards the NICU. ‘I think he’ll be promoted to the special care nursery very quickly, but we’ll check him out first in the NICU.’

Her eyes softened. ‘You come and visit him as soon as you’re up to it or I’ll come to see you if he misbehaves before then.’ Her gentle voice was warm and compassionate and Sally nodded mutely. Her eyes met Lucy’s as her baby was wheeled away.

‘He’ll be fine,’ Lucy whispered. ‘He looks little but very strong.’

Sally sniffed and nodded and Lucy squeezed her hand. ‘Let’s get you sorted so you can go and see what he’s up to.’

Afterwards, when Sally had showered and the two young women had had a chance to look at the photos, Lucy was very glad she’d taken them.

The luminous joy on Sally’s face as she gazed at her tiny son—a close-up of a starfish hand, a tiny foot lying on his mother’s fingers, and one of him snuggled against his mother’s breasts before he’d been whisked away to the neonatal nursery, were all a comfort to a new mother whose baby had been taken for care somewhere else.

Even on the poor-quality prints in black and white that Lucy printed out on the ward computer Sally looked a beautiful mum.

As she waited in the wheelchair, Sally’s finger traced the distinguishing features of her tiny son’s face and body on the images.

‘I’m glad I had you looking after me.’

Lucy squeezed Sally’s shoulder. ‘I’m glad I was here. Thank you for letting me share your birth.’

Her first birth as a proper midwife had been as empowering for Sally as she could make it. And she could tell that the young mum was pretty chuffed at how she’d managed everything that had been asked of her.

Lucy had never felt so proud of anyone as she was of Sally. She glanced around to see that they had collected everything from the room and pushed the chair forward. ‘We’ll drop this stuff in your room and then we’ll go and see this gorgeous son of yours.’

Five hours later, at the end of the shift, a shift that had held her first prem birth, a quick catch of another impatient baby keen to arrive before the rest of the staff were ready, and a smile from a very senior obstetrician for a job well done, Lucy picked up her bag from the staffroom.

She should be feeling ecstatic as she walked past the sluice room on the way out but, in fact, she felt dreadful.

The nausea that had been building all day suddenly rushed up her throat in an imminent threat—so much so that she had to launch herself at the sluice-room sink in desperation.

Nikolai, too, was on his way out the door when he saw the sudden acceleration of the new midwife who’d been so diligent today.

He frowned as he realised the nature of her distress, and glanced hopefully left and right for someone else in scrubs, but saw nobody he could call on to assist her. He sighed, shrugged, and approached the doorway.

‘Are you okay?’ By the time he reached her it seemed it was over.

Her forehead rested on the tips of the fingers of one hand as she rinsed the sink. The fragility of her pale neck made him reach for his handkerchief and he leaned past her and dampened it under the cold running water. He wrung it out before handing it to her to wipe her face.

To his amusement she was so intent on patting her hot cheeks that she muttered thanks without turning. Later, perhaps it would be different, but at the moment it seemed she was just glad she’d made it to somewhere manageable.

Then she glanced back and he saw her glance hesitantly past him and he wondered if she expected the whole staff to be lined outside, watching her.

‘Nobody else saw.’

Her shoulders sank with relief and he bit back a smile. So transparent.

‘Thank goodness. It’s crazy.’ He could just catch the words because she seemed to be talking to his tie. ‘I’ve been feeling nauseated all day and it just caught up with me.’

‘Not pregnant, are you?’ He smiled, in no way expecting the startled look of shock that spread over her face as she glanced up at him. Oh, dear me, Nikolai thought, and couldn’t help flashing back to his sister all those years ago.

No doubt it was that connection that caused his sudden surge of protective feeling towards this wilting poppy in front of him, but the sudden urge to hug her disconcerted him. He hadn’t wanted to drop a bombshell like that, neither had he had any intention of ruining her day, but it was far too late now. He resigned himself to waiting for her to gather herself.

‘I can’t be.’ But even in that tiny whisper Nick heard the thread of perhaps. Perhaps. Perhaps?

She lifted her gaze to his again and he could see the intriguing green flecks in the hugeness of her horrified hazel eyes.

He’d put his foot in it, obviously. ‘So you haven’t tested for pregnancy?’

‘Hadn’t given it a thought,’ she mumbled, and blushed. ‘I didn’t consider that precautions might let me down during my first and only ever one-night stand. And that was ages ago.’ Her bitterness was unmistakable. She leant back over the sink to cover her face.

Nick winced at the vagaries of fate. Here was a woman anything but pleased by her fertility, while his sister would give anything to be able to fall pregnant again.

He didn’t know how he could help, or even why he wanted to, but he couldn’t just leave.

Maybe he was wrong. He knew nothing about her. ‘Perhaps you’re not pregnant. Could be gastro. Lack of food. You could try a pregnancy test. I have some in my rooms. Might even be negative.’

She looked at him, he saw the brief flare of hope, and she nodded. ‘That seems sensible. Of course I’m not…’ She blushed, no doubt at the blurting out of the indiscreet information she’d given him. He’d have liked to have been able to reassure her he could forget her indiscretion—no problem—but he wasn’t sure how.

She didn’t meet his eyes. ‘It could just be the excitement of the day. Would you mind?’

‘It’s the least I can do after scaring you like that.’ He smiled encouragingly and after a brief glance she smiled back tentatively. ‘Follow me.’

He glanced sideways and realised she’d had to skip a little to keep up. He guessed he did take big steps compared to hers, and slowed his pace. ‘Sorry.’ He smiled down at her. ‘It’s been a busy day and I’m still hyped.’

Lucy slowed with relief. She’d been hyped, too, until his random suggestion had blown her day out of the water.

Neither of them commented as she followed him to the lift, luckily deserted, an ascent of two floors and then along the corridor to the consultant’s rooms. Lucy’s lips moved silently as she repeated over and over in her head, I am not pregnant, I am not pregnant!

CHAPTER TWO

TEN MINUTES LATER that theory crashed and burned.

Lucy sank into the leather chair in Nikolai’s office with the glass of water he’d given her in hand and tried to think.

She shook her head and closed her eyes for a moment. ‘I’m my mother all over again.’

When she opened her eyes he was smiling gently. ‘All mothers are their mothers.’

She sat up with a sigh. ‘Well, I really am mine. On the brink of a career I’ve worked so hard for and I’ve ruined my life.’ She could not believe this.

‘It’s been a shock. Can you remember when…?’ He paused delicately and Lucy felt her cheeks warm again. This just got worse and worse. ‘The night of our graduation.’ Her hand crept over her stomach. This could not be happening, but the tiny bulge of her belly, something she’d been lamenting over the last week and blamed on the huge box of rocky road chocolate she’d been given, suddenly took on an ominous relevance to her queasiness.

How could she have been so stupid not to notice? She was a midwife, for pity’s sake! But she’d been so excited about her job, and the house-sitting opportunity that would allow her to save money. She’d always been someone who got car sick, plane sick, excitement sick, thanks to an anxiety to please she’d thought she’d beaten.

It was a wonder she hadn’t been throwing up every morning if she was pregnant, the way her stomach usually reacted to change. ‘I can’t be pregnant. It must be something else.’

He had such calm, sympathetic eyes. But she could tell he thought the test was valid. She guessed he had experience of this situation. Well, she didn’t.

‘Would you like me to run a quick ultrasound to confirm the test?’

She wanted to say, no, that would be too real. She knew a little about ultrasounds in early pregnancy. She had seen obstetricians during her practical placements using the machines on the ward when women were bleeding.

Find the sac. Foetal poles. Heartbeat if far enough along. She didn’t want to know how far she had to be along. Somewhere around fourteen weeks, seeing as that had been the only time she’d ever had sex. Did she want more proof?

Maybe it was something else. Yeah, right. Fat chance. And she may as well face the reality until she decided what she was going to do and how she was going to manage this.

He was asking again, ‘Would you like me to ask a nurse to come in? My receptionist has gone home. Just while we do this?’

God, no. ‘No, thank you, if that’s okay. Please. I don’t want anyone to know.’ She covered her eyes. She didn’t want to know, but she couldn’t say that.

‘I understand.’ His voice was low, that trace of accent rough with sympathy, and she had the sense he really did understand a little how she was feeling.

Maybe she was even glad he was there to be a stabiliser while she came to grips with this, except for the fact she’d have to see him almost every day at work, and he’d know her secret.

‘Just do it.’ Lucy climbed up onto the examination couch in his rooms, feeling ridiculous, scared and thoroughly embarrassed. Lucy closed her eyes and the mantra kept running through her head. This could not be happening.

Nikolai switched on the little portable ultrasound machine he kept in the corner of his rooms. This must have been how his sister had felt when she’d found out the worst thing a sixteen-year-old Greek Orthodox girl could find out. He just hoped there was someone here for this young woman.

He tried not to notice the unobtrusively crossed fingers she’d hidden down her sides as he tucked the towel across her upper abdomen to protect her purple scrubs from the gel. He didn’t like her chances of the test strip being disputed by ultrasound.

He tucked another disposable sheet low in her abdomen, definitely in professional mode, and squirted the cool jelly across the not so tiny mound of her belly. She had silky, luminous skin and he tried not to notice.

When he felt her wince under his fingers, he paused until he checked she was okay, and she nodded before he recommenced the slide of the ultrasound transducer sideways. He couldn’t help but admire the control she had under the circumstances. He wondered if Chloe had been this composed.

He glanced from her to the screen and then everything else was excluded as he concentrated on the fascinating parallel universe of pelvic ultrasound.

An eerie black-and-white zone of depth and shadings. Uterus. Zoom in. Foetal spine. So the foetus was mature enough for morphology. Foetal skull. Measure circumference. Crown-rump length. Placenta. Cord. Another cord?

He blinked. ‘Just shutting the blinds so I can see better.’ He reached across to the wall behind her head and the remote-control curtains dulled the brightness of the Queensland sun. Zoomed in closer. Uh-oh.

The room dimmed behind Lucy’s closed eyelids and then she heard it. The galloping hoofbeats of a tiny foetal heart. No other reason to have a galloping horse inside her belly except the cloppety-clop of a baby’s heartbeat.

She was pregnant.

It was true. She couldn’t open her eyes. Was terrified to confirm it with sight but her ears wouldn’t lie.

She couldn’t cope with this. Give up her hard-won career just when it was starting. Throw away the last three years of intense study, all the after-hours work to pay for it, all her dreams of being the best midwife GCG had ever seen.

Cloppety-clop, cloppety-clop. The heartbeat of her baby, growing inside her. Her child. Something shifted inside her.

She had to look. She opened her eyes just as Dr Kefes sucked in his breath and she glanced at his face. She saw the frown as he swirled the transducer around and raised his eyebrows.

What? ‘Has it got two heads?’ A flippant comment when she was feeling anything but flippant. Was her baby deformed? Funny how the last thing she wanted was to be pregnant but the barest hint of a problem with her tiny peanut and she was feeling…maternal?

‘Sort of.’ He clicked a snapshot with the machine and shifted the transducer. Clicked again.

Her stomach dropped like a stone. There was something wrong with her baby?

‘What?’

‘Sorry. Not what I meant.’ He was looking at her with a mixture of concern and…it couldn’t be wonderment surely. ‘Congratulations, Lucy.’

That didn’t make sense. Neither did a second heartbeat, this one slower than the other but still a clopping sound that both of them recognised. ‘The measurements say you have two healthy fourteen-week foetuses.’

‘I’m sorry?’ He had not just said that. ‘Two?’

‘Twins.’ He nodded to confirm his words. Held up two fingers in case she still didn’t get it.

Lucy opened and shut her mouth before the words came out. ‘Twins? Fourteen weeks?’ Lucy squeaked, and then the world dimmed, only to return a little brighter and a whole lot louder than before—like a crash of cymbals beside her ear. She wasn’t just pregnant. She was seriously, seriously pregnant.

She watched the screen zoom in and out in a haze of disbelief. Followed his finger as he pointed out legs and arms. And legs and arms. Two babies!

‘I don’t want twins. I don’t want one,’ she whispered, but even to her own ears there might be a question mark at the end of the sentence. She couldn’t really be considering what she thought she was considering.

She thought briefly of Mark, her midwifery colleague already settled in Boston at his new job, a good-time guy with big plans. Their actions had been a silly impulse, regrettable but with no bad feelings, more a connection between two euphoric graduates than any kind of meeting of souls.

They’d both been sheepish after the event. The whole ‘do you want coffee, can I use your bathroom’, morning-after conversation that had made it very clear neither had felt the earth move—friends who should never have been lovers.

Dr Kefes broke into her thoughts and she blinked. ‘If you are going to think about your options you don’t have much time. In fact, you may not have any.’

Think about what? Terminating her babies that she’d heard? Seen? Was now totally aware of? She didn’t know what she was going to do but she couldn’t do that.

‘Do they look healthy? Are they identical?’ From what she’d learned about twin pregnancies there’d be more risk with identical twins than fraternal and already that was a worry.

‘Looks to be one placenta but it’s hard to tell. Early days, to be sure. They look fine.’ His accent elongated the word fine and her attention zoned in on something non-traumatic—almost soothing—but he was forging on and she needed to pay attention. ‘Both babies are equal size. Nothing out of the ordinary I can see.’ He smiled and she was distracted for a second again from the whole tragedy. He was a serious darling, this guy. Then his words sank in.

Relief flooded over her. Her babies were fine. Relief?

She didn’t know how she would manage. Certainly with no help from her own mother—how on earth would she tell her?—but she would manage. And no way was she going to blame her babies like her mother had always blamed her for ruining her life.

But that was for home. For quiet, intense thought. And she’d held this kind man up enough with her sudden drama that had blown out of all proportion into a life-changing event. Events.

She was having twins.

Holy cow.

On the first day of her new job.

She had no idea where to start with planning her life but she’d better get on with it. ‘Thank you.’

Nikolai removed the transducer and nodded. As he wiped her belly he watched in awe as this slip of a girl digested her news with fierce concentration.

She was thanking him?

Well, he guessed she knew a lot more than she had half an hour ago because of him. And she seemed to be holding together pretty well. He thought of his sister again and his protective instincts kicked in. He didn’t stop to think why he felt more involved than usual. But it was all a bit out of left field. ‘Will you be all right?’

He wasn’t sure what he’d do if she said no, and as he caught her eye, her delightful mouth curved into a smile and he saw her acknowledge that.

‘Not a lot we can do if I’m not, is there?’ She sat up and he helped her climb down. ‘But, yes, I’ll be fine. Eventually.’

He thought of his sister and the disastrous decisions she’d made in the heat of her terrifying moment all those years ago. And the ramifications now.

He thought of this woman under the care of a less-than-proficient practitioner like his sister had been, and his mind rebelled with startling force. ‘I realise it’s early, but if you’d like me to care for you through your pregnancy, I’d be happy to. There’d be no additional cost, of course.’

‘Thank you, Dr Kefes. I think I’d like that when I get used to the idea of being pregnant. That would be most reassuring.’

She straightened her scrubs and he gestured for her to sit in the office chair.

‘Wait one moment and I’ll print out a list of pathology tests I’d like you to have. The results will come to me and we’ll discuss them when they come back.’

The little unexpected catches of his accent made him seem less formidable and Lucy could feel the relief that at least she wouldn’t be cast adrift with the bombshell all alone.

She watched his long fingers fly across the keyboard as he opened a file on his desk computer. He made her feel safe, which was dumb because she was just a silly little girl who’d got herself pregnant, and she almost missed it when he asked for her full name, date of birth and residential address.

Luckily her mouth seemed to be working even if her brain wasn’t and she managed the answers without stumbling.

He stood up. Darn, that man was tall. ‘The rest we will sort out at your next visit.’

Lucy nodded, took the form, and jammed it in her bag. ‘Thank you. It’s been a huge day.’

‘Enormous for you, of course.’ Nikolai decided she still looked dazed and he resisted the urge to give her a quick hug. He would have given Chloe one but he wasn’t in the habit of hugging patients or staff.

‘And…’ he hesitated ‘…may I offer you congratulations?’

‘I guess congratulations are in order.’ She shook her head and he didn’t doubt she was only barely comprehending what her news would entail.

There was an awkward pause and he searched around for something normal to say. ‘Sister May tells me it was your first day of work. You did well and I look forward to working with you.’

He sounded patronising but had only intended to try to ease her discomfort about seeing him on the ward tomorrow.

He tried again. ‘Of course your news will remain confidential until you decide to say otherwise.’

She nodded and he saw her draw a deep breath as she faced the door. She lifted her chin and He leaned in front of her to open the door. ‘Allow me.’

He actually felt reassured. She would be fine. He now had some idea how strong this young woman really was. He would see that she and her babies remained as healthy as possible, he vowed as he watched her walk away.

But she did look heartbreakingly alone.

Lucy had always been alone.

Half an hour later she pushed open the door to her tiny cabana flat and the really bizarre thing was that it looked the same as when she’d left that morning.

It was she who’d changed. Drastically. And she was alone to face it. But then again when hadn’t she been alone to face things? Luckily she had practice at it. The upside was that in about six months’ time she’d never be alone again.

Upside? There was an upside? Where was the anxiety she should be feeling? She’d lived her whole life with that. Trying to do the right thing. She searched her feelings for anger and blame for the life-changing event that had just been confirmed, but she didn’t find any.

Why aren’t I angry with my babies? Didn’t my mother get this feeling I’m feeling now? Almost—no, not almost, definitely—a real connection with her babies. Maybe this was what she was meant to be. A mother.

But twins. Fourteen weeks pregnant was ridiculous. Her first pregnancy was going to be over in twenty-six weeks’ time, because she’d already gone through more than a third of it.

She’d better get her head around it pretty darned quick. Let alone the known fact that twins often came earlier than expected.

She guessed she’d had her official first antenatal visit with the delicious Dr Nick.

She had to snap any of those thoughts out of her brain. Not only had he been there to see her throw up but to hear her whole sordid story of a one-night stand resulting in an unwanted pregnancy. Times two.

She frowned, and her hand crept to her tiny bulge. ‘It’s okay, babies, I do want you now that I know about you, but you could have waited for a more opportune time.’

Lucy rolled her eyes. ‘Like in about ten years, when I’d found a man who wanted to be your father. Preferably after the wedding.’ Someone like Dr Kefes?

She straightened her shoulders and patted her belly. ‘But don’t worry. I’ll give you all the love I never had and there will be no string of uncles staying over. If I don’t meet a one hundred per cent perfect daddy for you, we’ll do this ourselves.’

Her voice died away and she glanced around the empty room. She was going mad already. She’d bet Dr Kefes thought she was mad.

Twenty-two, single and taking on twins instead of the career she’d worked so hard to achieve.

She had almost been able to feel his soothing persona. He’d been very kind. Incredibly supportive considering he didn’t know her. She could understand why women fell a little in love with their obstetricians if they were all like him.

Though she didn’t think there could be a lot of tall, dark and dreamy docs out there with such a delicious hint of a foreign accent.

But at the end of everything, she would be the one holding the babies, and she’d better stop thinking that some demi-god was going to swoop in and lend her a hand.

This was her responsibility and hers alone.

She glanced at the tiny cabana she’d been lucky enough to score in exchange for house-sitting the mansion out front, and she was thankful. Be thankful. She needed to remember that. If the owners decided to sell, something else would turn up. She had to believe that.

And she would find a way to support her babies. She’d just have to save every penny she could until she finished work.

At least she’d get maternity leave—or would she if she was fourteen weeks pregnant on her first day? More things to find out.

But they did have a crèche at the hospital so eventually she’d be able to go back. If Flora May would have her after she told her the news. She put her head in her hands.

And how would she tell her mother?

A kilometre away, Nikolai threw his keys on the hall table inside the door of his flat and pulled off his tie. What a day. And not just with work.

He wasn’t sure why he was so rattled by his encounter with Lucy the midwife, and her news, but he guessed it had to do with the day starting with his sister’s phone call. He’d obviously associated the two women in his mind.

That explained his bizarre feeling of connection with young Lucy. And that was what she was. Young. Barely over twenty, and he was a good ten years older so it had to be an avuncular or older-brother protectiveness. He’d just have to watch it in case she got any ideas.

Because he certainly didn’t have any.

Maybe it hadn’t been so clever to offer to look after her during her pregnancy, but it had seemed right at the time. And he genuinely wanted her to have the best care.

But when the next day at work he only saw Lucy in the distance, she waved once discreetly because both of them were busy with their own workload, and by the end of the day His concerns had seemed foolish.

He wasn’t piqued she hadn’t made any effort to speak to him. Of course not. His concerns were ridiculous. But it seemed he had no worries that she might take liberties with his offer.

Then the day suddenly got busier and Lucy and her problems disappeared into the back of his mind.

The busyness of the ward continued for almost a fortnight, so much so that the staff were counting back in the calendars to see what had happened around this time ten months ago. Solar eclipse? Power blackout?

There was an unofficial competition to see who could come up with the most likely reason for the surge in births.

It was Lucy’s fifth shift in a row and she was finding it harder to get out of bed at six in the morning.

‘Come on, lazybones,’ she grumbled to herself as she sat up on the side of the bed. ‘You’ve got no stamina. You think it’s going to be easier when you’ve got to get two little bodkins organised every three hours for feeds?’

She stood up and rubbed her back. ‘They all say it’s going to get quieter at work again soon. You can do this.’ And she still hadn’t told her mother. She’d told Mark and he’d offered money. And no strings. That was a good thing because she knew in her heart an unwilling Mark wasn’t the answer for either of them. The last thing she wanted was her babies to see her in an unhappy relationship.

When Nikolai saw Lucy he could tell she was starting to feel the frenetic pace. Her usual determined little walk had slowed and he didn’t notice her smile as often.

The next time he saw her he decided she looked far too pale and he couldn’t remember any results from the blood tests he’d ordered a fortnight ago.

He added ‘Follow up with Lucy’ to his list of tasks for the day and tracked her down towards the end of the shift.

‘One moment, Lucy.’

She stopped and smiled tiredly up at him. ‘Yes, Doctor?’

He felt like offering her a chair. Wasn’t anyone looking after this girl? It had been hard enough for him to look after Chloe and he’d been the same age as Lucy was now. And a man, not a slip of a girl.

It was tough making ends meet when you were trying to get through uni and feed yourself. He wondered if she was eating properly before he realised she was waiting for him to finish his sentence.

‘Sorry.’ He glanced around but no one was near them. ‘I wondered why I haven’t seen those results yet.’

Lucy racked her brain. An hour of the shift to go and she was finding it hard not to yawn. Now he wanted results and she had no idea whose he was talking about. For which patient? She frowned. ‘Was I supposed to give you some results?’

‘Yours. Antenatal screening.’ He looked so hard at her she felt like he’d put her under the microscope.

‘You look pale.’

She felt pale, if that was possible. She’d forgotten the tests. She ran back over that momentous day, back to his rooms. Yes, he’d given her forms, and the form was still scrunched in the bottom of her bag. Maybe there was something Freudian about that.

She sighed. ‘I keep meaning to get them done. Maybe I’m not ready to tell the world.’

She saw him glance at her stomach and raise his eyebrows. She looked down, too. And didn’t think it showed much yet.

He was frowning and he rarely frowned. That was one of the things she liked about this guy. One of the many things.

‘I’d like you to do them today, if you could, please. Outside the hospital if you want to. But if you have them done internally there will be no charge for the pathology.’

And pathology tests could be expensive. Expenses she needed to cut back on. ‘Big incentive.’ She nodded. Just so he knew she meant it. ‘I’ll go after work.’

He stayed where he was. Looking so calm and collected and immaculate. She felt like a dishrag. Her back hurt. What else did he want?

‘And could you make an appointment to come and see me in two days? I’ll let my secretary know.’

Lucy laughed for the first time that day. It actually felt good. She could even feel the tension drop from her shoulders and reminded herself she needed to shed a few chuckles more often. She didn’t want to forget that. Her mother had rarely laughed while she had been growing up.

But two days? It seemed she wasn’t the only one who was tired. ‘Two days is a Sunday. I don’t think your secretary will be take an appointment on that one. But I will make it for Monday.’

Nick smiled back at her and she felt her cheeks warm. She frowned at herself and him. He shouldn’t smile at emotional, hormonal women like that. Especially ones who were planning to be single mothers of twins.

She was never going to feel second best again and he made her feel like she wanted to be better than she was. The guy was just too perfect. For her anyway.

‘Thanks for the reminder. Have to go.’ She turned and walked back to the desk and she could hear his footsteps walking away. She could imagine the sight. The long strides. The commanding tilt of his head. Not fair.

‘You okay there, Palmer?’ Flora May was staring at her under her grizzled brows. She glanced at the receding back of Dr Kefes. ‘Is he giving you a hard time?’

‘No. Of course not. He’s been very kind.’ Though she smiled at her fierce protector. ‘I’m just tired.’ Flora May did not look convinced. Lucy tried again. ‘Not sure if I’m not coming down with something.’

Flora and Lucy were very similar in the way they viewed their vocation, and Lucy appreciated having Flora on her side. Never warm and fuzzy, Flora’s no-nonsense advice was always valid, and usually made Lucy smile.

‘You do look peaky. Pale and limp probably describes you.’

Lucy had to smile at the unflattering description. ‘Thank you, Sister.’

‘If you’re unwell, go to the staff clinic at Emergency. Nobody else wants to catch anything. Either way, you can leave early. I’ll do your handover. You get here fifteen minutes early every day and you’re the last to leave. You’ve earned some time in lieu.’

The idea was very attractive.

Flora’s lips twitched. ‘But don’t expect it every week.’

‘I certainly won’t.’ Lucy looked at her mentor. Maybe now was a good time. She’d hate Flora to find out from someone else or, worse, through a rumour. ‘Can I see you for a moment, Sister? In private.’

‘Of course.’ Flora gestured to her office.

Lucy drew a deep breath and Flora frowned at her obvious trepidation. ‘Spit it out, Palmer.’

‘I’m pregnant.’ Lucy searched Flora’s face for extreme disappointment. Anger. Disgust. She’d suspected Flora had plans for her training and knew she had been instrumental in choosing Lucy over other applicants. But Flora’s expression didn’t change. Except to soften.

She stepped forward and put her arm around Lucy’s shoulders and gave her a brief, awkward hug before she snapped back into her professional self.

‘That explains a lot,’ she said gruffly. Cleared her throat. ‘You’ve been a little more preoccupied than I expected.’ To Lucy’s stunned relief she even smiled. ‘When, in fact, you’ve been a lot more focused than you could be expected to be.’ Flora gazed past Lucy’s shoulder while she thought about it.

Then she concentrated on Lucy again. ‘And Dr Kefes is looking after you? He knows?’

Lucy blinked and nodded. How did Flora know this stuff? ‘I forgot to have some tests and he was reminding me.’

‘He’s a good man.’ Then she said something strange. ‘Don’t go falling for him. Easy people to fall for, obstetricians.’

Didn’t she know it! A mental picture of Dr Kefes, five minutes ago, smiling down at her and her own visceral response highlighted that dilemma. No way was she going down that demoralising path. ‘I won’t. I’m not that stupid.’

Flora sniffed. Her piercing gaze stayed glued on Lucy’s face. ‘Is there a man on the scene? Some help coming?’

Lucy shook her head. She wasn’t anxious to go into it but, judging by the sigh, it seemed Flora had expected that. ‘Your family?’

Lucy shook her head again. She could dream her mother would turn into a supportive, caring, helpful shoulder to lean on but it was highly unlikely. She so dreaded that conversation but after surviving telling Flora today, maybe she could even hope a little that it would be as bad as she dreaded.

‘I’ve got your back, Palmer. Go home now. Rest. You still look peaky. And if you want help or advice—ask!’

Lucy nodded past the lump in her throat. How had she been so lucky to end up with Flora as a boss?

Flora smiled at her. ‘Look after yourself, Palmer. I still have big plans for you.’

Now she felt like crying, and if she didn’t get out of here quickly she’d disgrace herself by throwing her sobbing self onto the starched front of her boss.

Lucy almost ran from the ward, past Cass who was on day shifts for a few weeks, and in her hasty departure she didn’t see the speculative look that followed her.

She also forgot all about the blood tests she was supposed to get as she pressed the button for the lift and escape.

The doors opened. When she stepped in Nikolai was standing at the back of the lift like her nemesis. ‘Are you going to Pathology now?’

Lucy blinked. She felt like smacking her forehead but instead refused to be goaded into saying she’d forgotten again. ‘Are you following me?’

Thick, dark, eyebrows lifted. ‘I imagine that would be difficult from the inside of a lift. Not being able to see through the walls.’

She played the words back in her head and winced. Impolite and ungrateful. It wasn’t Dr Kefes’s fault she felt physically and emotionally exhausted. ‘Sorry. And, yes.’ She sighed. ‘I’ll go to Pathology now.’

The lift stopped on another floor and two intense, white-coated doctors entered, and the conversation died a natural death.

Lucy recognised one of the newcomers, Callie Richards, the paediatrician who was looking after Sally’s baby. They both nodded at Nick but the tension between them was palpable to the other two in The lift and, fancifully, Lucy decided the air was actually shimmering.

It seemed other people had dramas, too. The man raised his eyebrows at Nick, who didn’t change his expression, and Callie offered a forced smile to Lucy, who smiled back awkwardly.

One floor down the late arrivals stepped out and as the doors shut Lucy let out the breath she hadn’t realised she’d been holding in a little whistle. She looked at Nikolai. ‘Who’s the guy?’

Nick smiled. ‘Cade Coleman, prenatal surgeon from Boston. And you’ve met Callie Richards, the neonatal specialist. She’s in charge of the NICU here and is looking after Sally’s baby.’

‘Yep. I remember her. She seems nice. It was just him I didn’t know. I guess I’ll recognise everyone soon.’

They reached the ground floor and the lift light changed to indicate ‘up’. Lucy realised she hadn’t directed the lift to take her further down to the laboratory.

Nikolai shook his head and pressed the lower-ground button for Pathology to override the person above. He put his hand across the doors to hold them open. ‘Are you working on Monday?’

‘One in the afternoon.’

‘Perhaps you’d like to see me to get your results before you start. My rooms. Twelve-thirty? In case you forget to make the appointment.’

Ooh. It was her turn to give him the look. ‘Fine. Thank you.’ As he took his arm away from the doors she said, ‘Are you this helpful to all your pregnant ladies?’

He shrugged and she couldn’t read the expression on his face. ‘Only the really vague ones who forget to have their bloods done.’

‘Touché,’ she said cheekily, and he smiled. She watched him walk away until the doors shut and the lift sailed downwards. Well, she had been vague to forget again but she needed to sleep. As soon as she got home she was going to bed and sleeping the clock round.

Nick’s hand tightened on his briefcase as he strode to the doctors’ car park. She had a point. But the memories of Chloe, gaunt and drawn, haunted him and when he’d seen Lucy was looking so tired it had brought it all back. He needed to stop worrying about her. She wasn’t Chloe, neither was she his responsibility. Although even Chloe would have a fit if she thought he still felt the need to keep her under his wing.

His phone rang. His registrar. Thoughts of Lucy shifted to the back of his mind again as he turned back to the hospital.

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