Dear Reader

When I decided to write a Medical Romance™ set in an exotic place Benin, West Africa, was an easy choice. I could still see the gripping photographs my husband had taken when he worked in a mission hospital there some years ago, and enjoyed hearing his account of the months he was there. It was interesting learning more about Benin and thinking about the kinds of people who dedicate their lives to medical work there and elsewhere.

My story’s hero is Dr Chase Bowen, who grew up in mission hospitals and is now dedicated to his patients and to the work he considers his calling. Because he knows from experience that it isn’t safe for non-native children in the countries where he works, Chase believes having a family of his own isn’t an option. Until Dr Danielle Sheridan returns to his life, bringing with her the son he didn’t know he had.

Danielle believed she was doing the best thing for her son, keeping him a secret, since Chase had made it clear he never wanted children. Now that Chase knows, can they make a new relationship work with the challenges of their careers and fears? Chase wants marriage, but Dani isn’t convinced. Then a terrifying event challenges them both.

I hope you enjoy reading CHANGED BY HIS SON’S SMILE as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Robin Gianna

CHANGED BY HIS SON’S SMILE is Robin Gianna’s debut title!

Changed By His Son’s Smile
Robin Gianna

www.millsandboon.co.uk

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Dedication

To George, my own doctor hero husband.

Thank you for supporting me in my writing dream, for answering my endless medical questions, and for putting up with the piles of books and pens and papers and Post-it® notes that clutter our house. I love you.

Acknowledgments

For me, it takes a village to write a Medical Romance™!

Many thanks to:

Kevin Hackett, MD and Betsy Hackett, RN, DSN, for tolerating my frantic phone calls and hugely assisting me.

SO appreciate the awesome scene, Kevin!

My lovely sister-in-law, Trish Connor, MD, for her great ideas and help.

Critique partner, writer friend, and pediatric emergency physician Meta Carroll, MD, for double-checking scenes for accuracy. You’re wonderful!

The many writer friends I can’t begin to thank enough, especially Sheri, Natalie, Susan and Margaret. Without you, my bootstraps might still be laying on the floor.

My agent, Cori Deyoe of 3 Seas Literary Agency, for her tireless assistance with everything.

Table of Contents

Cover

Title Page

Dedication

Acknowledgments

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Epilogue

Copyright

CHAPTER ONE

THE POOR WOMAN might not be able to have more babies, but at least she wasn’t dead.

Chase Bowen’s patient stared at him with worry etched on her face as she slowly awakened from surgery.

He leaned closer, giving her a reassuring smile. “It’s okay now. You’re going to be fine,” Chase said in Fon, the most common language in The Republic of Benin, West Africa. If she didn’t understand, he’d try again in French.

She nodded, and the deep, warm gratitude in her gaze filled his chest with an intense gratitude of his own. Times like these strengthened his appreciation for the life he had. He couldn’t imagine doing anything else.

Chase understood why, despite their family tragedy, his parents still spent their lives doctoring the neediest of humankind.

“Her vital signs are all normal, Dr. Bowen,” the nurse anesthetist said. “Thank God. I’ve never seen hemoglobin as rock bottom as hers.”

“Yeah. Ten more minutes and it probably would’ve been too late.”

He pressed his fingers to her pulse once more and took a deep breath of satisfaction. Ectopic pregnancy from pelvic inflammatory scarring was all too frequent in this part of the world, with polygamy and the diseases that came with that culture being commonplace. He’d feared this was one of the patients who wouldn’t make it.

There’d been too many close calls lately, and Chase tried to think what else they could do about that. Their group had an ongoing grass-roots approach, trying to encourage patients to come in before their conditions were critical. But people weren’t used to relying on modern medicine to heal them. Not to mention that patients sometimes had to walk miles just to get there.

“Will there be more babies?” the woman whispered.

He couldn’t tell if the fear in her voice was because she wanted more children, or because she didn’t want to go through such an ordeal again.

“We had to close off the tube that had the baby in it,” he said, gentling his voice. “But you still have another tube, so you can probably conceive another baby, if you want one.”

Whether she was fertile or not, Chase didn’t know. But the children she did have still had their mother. He squeezed her hand and smiled. “Your little ones who came with you looked pretty worried. Soon you’ll be strong enough to go home, and they’ll be very happy to have their maman again.”

A smile touched her lips as her eyelids drifted shut. Chase left her in the capable hands of the nurse anesthetist and stripped off his gown to head outside. Moist heat wrapped around him like a soft, cottony glove as he stepped from the air-conditioned cement-block building that made do as the clinic and O.R. for the local arm of Global Physicians Coalition.

Dusk still kept that particular inch of sub-Saharan West Africa bathed in low light at nine-thirty p.m., and he didn’t bother to pull his penlight from his pocket. The generators would be turned off soon, and the growl of his stomach reminded him he hadn’t eaten a thing since lunch. Finding dinner in the dark was a crap shoot, so a quick trip to the kitchen had to happen before the lights went out.

He strode around the corner of the building and nearly plowed down Trent Dalton.

“Whoa, you off to save another life?” Trent said, stumbling a few steps. “I heard your patient’s sister calling you ‘mon héros.’ I’m jealous.”

“I’m pretty sure you’ve been called a hero once or twice, deserved or not,” Chase said.

“Not by such a pretty young thing. I recall it coming from an elderly man, which didn’t stroke my needy ego quite as much.”

Chase snorted. “Well, thank the Lord the pregnant sister was my patient instead of yours. Your ego would explode if it got any bigger.”

“I’m confident, not egotistical,” Trent said, slapping Chase on the back. “Let’s see what there is to eat. I’ve gotta get some food before I have to scrounge for a coconut by the side of the road.”

“With any luck, Spud still has something in there for us.”

“No chance of that. He left a while ago to pick up the new doc who just arrived from the States.”

Spud wasn’t even here? Chase’s stomach growled louder as he realized the chances of finding anything halfway decent to eat was looking less likely by the minute.

The place would doubtless fall apart without Spud Jones, the go-to guy who cooked, ordered all the supplies, transported everyone everywhere and pretty much ran the place.

“How come I didn’t know there was a new doc coming?” Chase said as they walked toward the main building.

“Well, if you weren’t wrapped up in your own little world, maybe you’d enjoy more of the gossip around here.”

“Do you know who he is?”

“Not a he. A she. A very pretty she, according to Spud,” Trent said. “Thank God. As a constant companion, you’re not only the wrong gender, you’re dull as hell. We’re overdue for some new female beauty to spice things up around here.”

“We? You mean you,” Chase said with a grin. “There’s a reason Dr. Trent Dalton is known as the Coalition Casanova.”

“Hey, all work and no play makes life all work.” His light blue eyes twinkled. “She’s coming to finally get electronic clinic records set up on all the kids. I can’t wait to offer my suggestions and assistance.”

Chase laughed. As they neared the building, the sight of a Land Rover heading their way came into view within a cloud of dust on the road. Chances were good he’d worked with the new doctor before. The Global Physicians Coalition was a fairly small group, and most were great people. Medical workers who saw mission work as a calling, not just an occupation.

The sound of the Land Rover’s engine choked to a stop just out of sight in front of the building, and Trent turned to him with a smile of pure mischief. “And here’s my latest conquest arriving now. What a lucky lady.”

Trent took off towards the front doors and Chase followed more slowly, shaking his head with an exasperated smile. One of these days Trent’s way of charming the pants off women then leaving them flat with a smile and a wave was going to catch up with him. Not that his own record with females was much better.

“Bon soir, lovely lady. Welcome to paradise.”

Trent’s voice drifted across the air, along with Spud’s chuckle and a few more words from Trent that Chase didn’t catch.

Feminine laughter froze Chase in mid-step. A bubbly, joyous sound so distinctive, so familiar, so rapturous that his breath caught, knowing it couldn’t be her. Knowing he shouldn’t want it to be her. Knowing that he’d blown it all to hell when he’d last seen her anyway.

Without intent or permission, his feet headed towards the sound and the headlights of the dusty Land Rover. Shadowy figures stood next to it, and he could see Trent taking the new arrival’s bulky shoulder bag from her. Spud was obviously introducing the two, with Trent giving her his usual too-familiar embrace.

Chase had to fight the sudden urge to run forward, yank Trent loose, and tell him to keep his hands off.

He hadn’t needed to see the curly blonde halo glowing in the twilight to know it was her. To see that beautiful, crazy hair pulled into the messy ponytail that was so right for the woman who owned it. A visual representation of impulsive, exuberant, unforgettable Danielle Sheridan.

Chase stared at her across the short expanse of earth, his heart beating erratically as though he’d suddenly developed atrial fibrillation.

He’d always figured they’d run into one another again someday on some job somewhere in the world. But he hadn’t figured on it stopping his heart and shortening his breath. Three years was a long time. Too long to still be affected this way, and he didn’t want to think about what that meant.

She was dressed in her usual garb—khaki shorts that showed off her toned legs and a slim-fitting green T-shirt that didn’t attempt to hide her slender curves. In the process of positioning another bag on her shoulder, it seemed she felt his gaze and lifted her head. Their eyes met, and the vibrant, iridescent blue of hers shone through the near darkness, stabbing straight into his gut.

Her big smile faded and her expression froze. A look flickered across her face that didn’t seem to be just a reflection of what he was feeling. The feeling that it would’ve been better if they hadn’t been stuck working together again. Bringing back memories of hot passion and cold goodbyes.

No, it was more than that. The same shock he felt was accompanied by very obvious dismay. Horror, even. No happy reunion happening here, he guessed. Obviously, the way they’d parted three years ago had not left her with warm and fuzzy feelings toward him. Or even cool and aloof ones.

“Chase! Come meet your new cohort in crime,” Spud said.

He moved closer to the car on legs suddenly gone leaden. Dani’s heart-shaped face wore an expression of near panic. She bent down to peer into the backseat of the Land Rover then bobbed back up, their eyes meeting again.

“Danielle, this is Dr. Chase Bowen,” Spud said as he heaved her duffle. “Chase, Dr. Danielle Sheridan.”

“Dani and I have met,” Chase said. And wasn’t that an absurd understatement? They’d worked together for over a year in Honduras. The same year they’d made love nearly every day. Within warm waterfalls, on green mountain meadows, in sagging bunk beds.

The year Dani had told him she wanted to make it permanent, to have a family with him. For very good reasons, a family couldn’t happen for Chase, and he’d told her so. The next day she’d left the compound.

All those intense and mixed-up memories hung in the air between them, strangely intimate despite the presence of Trent and Spud. Suddenly in motion, she surprised him by moving fast, stepping around the hood of the car in a near jog straight towards him, thrusting her hand into his in a brusque, not-very-Dani-like way.

“Chase. It’s been a while. How’ve you been?”

Her polite tone sounded strained, and he’d barely squeezed her soft hand before she yanked it loose.

“Good. I’ve been good.” Maybe not so good. As he stared into the blue of her eyes, he remembered how much he’d missed her when she’d left. More than missed her sunny smile, her sweet face, her beautiful body.

But he’d known it had been best for both of them. If a family was what she wanted, she should marry a guy rooted in the States. No point in connecting herself to a wandering medic who wouldn’t have the least idea how to stay within the confines of a white picket fence.

Apparently, though, she hadn’t found husband and father material, because here she was in Africa. The woman who had burrowed under his skin like a guinea worm, and he had a bad feeling that her arrival would start that persistent itch all over again.

“Dani,” Spud called from across the car, “I’m going to take your duffle to your quarters, then be back to help you get—”

“Great, thanks,” Dani interrupted brightly. “I appreciate it.”

She turned back to Chase, and he noted the trapped, almost scared look in her eyes. Was the thought of having to work with him again that horrible?

“I thought the GPC website said you were in Senegal,” Dani said. “Are you … staying here?”

“No, just stopped in for a little day tour of the area.”

The twist of her lips showed she got his sarcasm loud and clear. What, she hoped he was about to grab a cab and head to the next tourist destination? He couldn’t remember Dani ever saying dumb things before. In fact, she was one of the smartest pediatricians he’d had the opportunity to work with over the years. One of the smartest docs, period.

“Well. I …” Her voice faded away and she licked her lips. Sexy, full lips he’d loved to kiss. Tempting lips that had been one of the first things he’d noticed about her when they’d first met.

“So-o-o,” Trent said, looking at Dani, then Chase, then back at Dani again with raised brows. “Chase and I were about to have a late dinner and a beer. Are you hungry?”

“No, thanks, I had snacks in the car. You two go on and eat, I’m sure you’re starved after a long day of clinic and surgeries.” She put on a bright and very fake smile. “I’ll get the low-down on the routine around here tomorrow. Right now I’m just going to have Spud show me my room and get settled in. Bye.”

She walked back to the other side of the Land Rover and then just stood there, hovering, practically willing them to leave. Well, if she wanted to act all weird about the two of them being thrown together again, that was fine by him.

“Come on,” he said to Trent as he moved towards the kitchen. While his appetite had somehow evaporated, a beer sounded damned good.

“Mommy!”

The sound of a muffled little voice floated across the sultry air, and Chase again found himself stopping dead. He slowly turned to see Dani leaning into the back of the Land Rover. To watch, stunned, as she pulled a small child out through the open door and perched him on her hip.

Guess he’d been wrong about her finding husband and father material. And pretty damned fast after she’d left.

“Mommy, are we there yet?” The sleepy, sweet-faced boy of about two and a half wrapped his arms around her neck and pressed his cheek to her shoulder. A boy who didn’t have blue eyes and crazy, curly blond hair like the woman holding him.

No, he had dark hair that was straight, waving just a bit at the ends. A little over-long, it brushed across eyebrows that framed brown eyes fringed with thick, dark lashes. A boy who looked exactly like the photos Chase’s mother had hauled all around the world and propped up in every one of the places they’d lived. Photos of him and his brother when they were toddlers.

Impossible.

But as he stared at the child then slowly lifted his gaze to Dani’s, the obvious truth choked off his breath and smacked him like a sledgehammer to the skull. He didn’t have to do the math or see the resemblance. The expression in her eyes and on her face told him everything.

He had a son. A child she hadn’t bothered to tell him about. A child she had the nerve, the stupidity to take on a medical mission to a developing country. Something he was adamantly against … and for good reason.

“I guess … we need to talk,” Dani said, glancing down at the child in her arms. She looked back at Chase with a mix of guilt, frustration and resignation flitting across her face. “But let’s … let’s do it tomorrow. I’m beat, and I need to get Andrew settled in, get him something to eat.”

“Andrew.” The name came slowly from his lips. It couldn’t be a coincidence that Andrew was his own middle name. Anger began to burn in his gut. Hot, scorching anger that overwhelmed the shock and disbelief that had momentarily paralyzed him. She’d named the boy after him, but hadn’t thought it necessary to even let him know the kid existed?

“No, Dani.” It took every ounce of self-control to keep his voice fairly even, to not shout out the fury roaring through his blood and pounding in his head. “I’m thinking a conversation is in order right this second. One more damned minute is too long, even though you thought three years wasn’t long enough.”

“Chase, I—”

“Okay, here’s the plan,” Trent said, stepping forward and placing his hand on Chase’s shoulder. “I’ll take Andrew to the kitchen, if he’ll let me. Spud and I’ll rustle up some food. You two catch up and meet us in the kitchen in a few.”

Trent reached for the boy with one of his famously charming smiles. Andrew smiled back but still clung to Dani’s neck like a liana vine.

“It’s okay, Drew,” Dani said in a soothing voice as she stroked the dark hair from the child’s forehead. “Dr. Trent is going to get you something yummy to eat, and Mommy will be right there in just a minute.”

“Believe it or not, Drew, I bet we can find some ice cream. And I also bet you like candy. The kids we treat here sure do.”

The doubtful little frown that had formed a crease between the child’s brows lifted. Apparently he had a sweet tooth, as he untwined his arms from Dani and leaned towards Trent.

“And you know what else? It’s going to be like a campout in the kitchen, ‘coz the lights are going out soon and we’ll have lanterns instead. Pretty cool, huh?”

Andrew nodded and grinned, his worries apparently soothed by the sweet adventure Trent promised.

Trent kept talking as he walked away with the child, but Chase no longer listened. He focused entirely on the woman in front of him. The deceiving, lying woman he’d never have dreamed would keep such an important thing a secret from him.

“I want to hear it from your lips. Is Andrew my son?” He knew, knew the answer deep in his gut but wanted to hear it just the same.

“Yes.” She reached out to rest her palm against his biceps. “Chase, I want you to understand—”

He pushed her hand from his arm. “I understand just fine. I understand that you lied to me. That you thought it would be okay to let him grow up without a father. That you brought my son to Africa, not caring at all about the risks to him. What is wrong with you that you would do all that?”

The guilt and defensiveness in her posture and expression faded into her own anger, sparking off her in waves.

“You didn’t want a family, remember? When I told you I wanted to marry, for us to have a family together, you said a baby was the last thing you would ever want. So, what, I should have said, ‘Gosh, that’s unfortunate because I’m pregnant’? The last thing I would ever want is for my child to know his father would consider him a huge mistake. So I left.”

“Planning to have a child is a completely different thing from this and you know it.” How could she not have realized he’d always honor his responsibilities? He’d done that every damned day of his life and wasn’t about to stop now. “What were you going to do when he was old enough to ask about his father? Did it never occur to you that if his dad wasn’t around to be a part of his life, he’d feel that anyway? That he’d think his father didn’t love him? Didn’t want him?”

“I … I don’t know.” Her shoulders slumped and she looked at the ground. “I just … I know what it’s like to have a father consider you a burden, and I didn’t want that for him. I thought I could love him enough for both of us.”

The sadness, the pain in her posture stole some of his anger, and he forced himself into a calmer state, to take a mental step back. To try to see it all from her perspective.

He had been adamant that children wouldn’t, couldn’t, fit into his life, ever. He’d learned long ago how dangerous it could be for non-native children in the countries where he worked. Where his parents worked. He couldn’t take that risk.

So when she’d proposed marriage and a family, he’d practically laughed. Now, knowing the real situation, he didn’t want to remember his cold response that had left no room for conversation or compromise.

No wonder she’d left.

She lifted her gaze to his, her eyes moist. “I’m sorry. I should have told you.”

“Yes. You should have told me.” He heaved in a deep breath then slowly expelled it. “But I guess I can understand why you didn’t.”

“So.” She gave him a shadow of her usual sunny smile. “We’re here. You know. He’s still young enough that he won’t think anything of being told you’re his daddy. My contract here is for eight months, so you’ll have a nice amount of time to spend with him.”

Did she honestly think he was going to spend a few months with the boy and leave it completely up to her how—and where—his son was raised?

“Yes, I will. Because I accept your marriage proposal.”

CHAPTER TWO

“EXCUSE ME?” DANI asked, sure she must have heard wrong.

“Your marriage proposal. I accept.”

“My marriage proposal?” Astonished, she searched the deep brown of Chase’s eyes for a sign that he was kidding, but the golden flecks in them glinted with determination. “You can’t be serious.”

“I assure you I’ve never been more serious.”

“We haven’t even seen each other for three years!”

“We were good together then. And we have a child who bonds us together now. So I accept your offer of marriage.”

The intensely serious expression on his face subdued the nervous laugh that nearly bubbled from her throat. Chase had always been stubborn and tenacious about anything important to him, and that obviously hadn’t changed. She tried for a joking tone. “I’m pretty sure a marriage proposal has a statute of limitations. Definitely less than three years. The offer no longer stands.”

“Damn it, Dani, I get it that it’s been a long time.” He raked his hand through his hair. “That maybe it seems like a crazy idea. But you have to admit that all of this is crazy. That we have a child together is … crazy.”

“I understand this is a shock, that we have things to figure out.” Three years had passed, but she still clearly remembered how shaken she’d been when she’d realized she was pregnant. Chase obviously felt that way now. Maybe even more, since Andrew was now here in the flesh. “But you must know that marriage is an extreme solution.”

“Hey, it was your idea to begin with, remember? You’ve persuaded me.” A slight smile tilted his mouth. “Besides, it’s not extreme. A child should have two parents. Don’t you care about Andrew’s well-being?”

Now, there was an insulting question. Why did he think she’d left in the first place? “Lots of children are raised by unmarried parents. He’ll know you’re his father. We’ll work out an agreement so you can spend plenty of time with him. But you and I don’t even know each other any more.”

Yet, as she said the words, it felt like a lie. She looked at the familiar planes of his ruggedly handsome face and the years since she’d left Honduras faded away, as though they’d never been apart. As though she should just reach for his hand to stroll to the kitchen, fingers entwined. Put together a meal and eat by candlelight as they so often had, sometimes finishing and sometimes finding themselves teasing and laughing and very distracted from all thoughts of food.

A powerful wave of all those memories swept through her with both pain and longing. Memories of what had felt like endless days of perfection and happiness. Both ridiculous and dangerous, because there was good reason why a relationship between them hadn’t been made for the long haul.

Perhaps he sensed the jumbled confusion of her emotions as his features softened as he spoke, his lips no longer flattened into a hard line. “I’m the same man you proposed to three years ago.”

“Are you?” Apparently his memory of that proposal was different from hers. “Then you’re the same man who didn’t want kids, ever. Who said your life as a mission doctor was not just what you did but who you were, and children didn’t fit into that life. Well, I have a child so you’re obviously not the right husband for me.”

His expression hardened again, his jaw jutting mulishly. “Except your child is my child, which changes things. I’m willing to compromise. To adjust my schedule to be with the two of you in the States part of the year.”

“Well, that’s big of you. Except I have commitments to work outside the States, too.” For a man with amazing empathy for his patients, he could be incredibly dense and self-absorbed. “We should just sit down, look at our schedules for after the eight months I’m here and see if we can often work near enough to one another that you can see Drew when you have time off.”

“I will not have my son living with the kinds of dangers Africa and other places expose him to.”

“You grew up living all over the world and you turned out just fine.” More than fine. From the moment she’d met him she’d known he was different. Compassionate and giving. Funny and irreverent. Book smart and street smart.

The most fascinating man she’d ever known.

The unyielding intensity in his eyes clouded for a moment before he flicked her a look filled with cool determination. “I repeat—my son needs to grow up safe in the States until he’s older. Getting married is the most logical course of action. We figure out how to make our medical careers work with you anchored in the U.S. and me working there part of the year. Then we bring him on missions when he’s an older teen.”

“Well, now you’ve touched on my heart’s desire. A marriage founded on a logical course of action.” She laughed in sheer disbelief and to hide the tiny bruising of hurt she should no longer feel. “You’ve got it all figured out, and you haven’t even spent one minute with him. Or with me. So, I repeat—I’m not marrying you.”

Frustration and anger narrowed his gaze before he turned and strode a short distance away to stare at the dark outline of the horizon, fisting his hands at his hips, his broad shoulders stiff. In spite of the tension simmering between them, she found herself riveted by the sight of his tall, strong body silhouetted in the twilight. The body she’d always thought looked like it should belong to a star athlete, not a doctor.

She tried to shake off the vivid memories that bombarded her, including how much she’d loved touching all those hard muscles covered in smooth skin. All the memories of how crazy she’d been about him, period. Three light-hearted years ago the differences they now faced hadn’t existed. Serious differences in how Andrew should be raised, and she still had no proof that Chase wouldn’t be as resentful in his reluctant role as father as her own parent had been.

Now that Chase would be involved in Andrew’s life, she had to make sure her son never felt the barbed sting of being unwanted.

Tearing her gaze from his stiff and motionless form, she turned to find Andrew and get him settled in. Chase must have heard her movement as he suddenly spun and strode purposefully towards her.

The fierce intensity in his dark eyes sent an alarm clanging in her brain. What was coming next she didn’t know, but her instincts warned her to get ready for it. He closed the inches between them and grasped her waist in his strong hands, tugging her tightly against his hard body.

A squeak of surprise popped from her lips as the breath squeezed from her lungs.

This she was definitely not ready for.

His thick, dark lashes were half-lowered over his brown eyes, and her heart pounded at the way he looked at her. With determined purpose and simmering passion.

“I remember a little about your heart and your desire.” His warm breath feathered across her mouth. “I remember how good it was between us. How good it can be again.”

She pressed her hands against his firm chest but didn’t manage to put an inch between them. Her heart thumped with both alarm and ridiculous excitement. “It’s been three years. Too long to just take up where we left off.”

“Not so long that I don’t remember where you like to be kissed.”

Surprise turned to shock when he lowered his head to touch his lips to the sensitive spot beneath her earlobe, slowly sliding them to the hollow of her throat, his voice vibrating against her skin. “How you like to be kissed.”

“Chase, stop.” A delicious shiver snaked its way down her body before he lifted his head to stare into her eyes. “We—”

His mouth dropped to hers and, despite the part of her brain protesting that a kiss between them just complicated things, her eyes slid closed. The soft warmth of his lips sent her spiraling back to all the times they’d sneaked kisses between patients, celebrating successful outcomes, or held each other in wordless comfort when a patient had been lost. To all the times they’d tramped in the mountains and made love anywhere that had seemed inviting.

Apparently, her hands had their own memories, slipping up his chest to cup the back of his neck, his soft hair tickling her fingers. He’s right. The vague thought flitted through her head as his wide palm slid between her shoulder blades, pressing her body closer as he deepened the kiss. It had been very, very good between them. Until it hadn’t been.

Through her sensual fog the thought helped her remember what a strategic man Chase could be. That this wasn’t unchecked, remembered passion but a calculated effort to weaken her resolve, to have her give in to his marriage demand.

She broke the kiss. “This isn’t a good idea.”

“Yes, it is.” His warm mouth caressed her jaw. “I’ve missed you. I think you’ve missed me, too.”

“Why would I miss being dragged out of bed to do calisthenics at six a.m.?” The words came out annoyingly breathy.

“But you missed being dragged into bed for another kind of exercise.”

His mouth again covered hers, sweet and insistent and drugging. One hand slipped down her hip and cupped her bottom, pulling her close against his hardened body.

He’d always teased her about how she couldn’t resist his touch, his kiss. A pathetically hungry little sound filled her throat as she sank in deeper, doing a very good job proving he’d been right.

But that was before, her sanity whispered.

Yanking her mouth determinedly from his, she dragged in a deep, quivering breath. “This won’t work. I know your devious strategies too well.”

His lips curved and his dark eyes sparked with liquid gold. “I think you’re wrong. I think it’s working.” He lifted one hand to press his fingers to her throat. “Your pulse is tachycardic and your breath is all choppy. Both clear indications of sexual desire.”

“Thanks for the physiology lesson.” She shoved hard at his chest to put a few inches between them and felt his own heart pounding beneath her hands. At least she wasn’t the only one feeling the heat. “But memories of good sex do not make a relationship. And definitely not a marriage.”

“So we make new memories.” His big hands cupped her face as his mouth joined hers again, and for a brief moment she just couldn’t resist. Softening, yielding to the seductive, soft heat of his kiss, to the feel of his thumbs feathering across her cheekbones, until her brain yelled his words of three years ago. That, despite what he said now, marriage and a family were the last things he ever wanted.

She couldn’t let him see the pathetic weakness for him that obviously still lurked inside her. She had to stay strong for Andrew.

The thought gave her the will to pull away completely and shake the thick haze from her brain, ignoring the hot tingle of her lips. “This is not a good idea,” she said again, more firmly this time. “Our … relationship … needs to be based on logic, just like you said. None of this to muddy things up.”

“You used to like things muddied up.”

The teasing half-smile and glint in his eyes made her want to kiss him and wallop him all at the same time. “I need to rescue Trent. You can meet Andrew, but I don’t want to tell him about … you … tonight. Let him spend a little time with you first.”

“So long as you understand this conversation isn’t over.”

Conversation? Was that what they’d been having? “I’d forgotten what a prince complex you have, bossing everyone around.”

She headed in the direction Trent and Andrew had disappeared, relieved to be back on stable ground without the confusion of his touch, his kiss. Then realized she hadn’t a clue where they’d gone. “Where is the kitchen anyway?”

Chase strode forward with the loose, athletic stride she’d always enjoyed. As though he was in no hurry to get where he was going but still covered the ground with remarkable speed.

“This way.”

His warm palm pressed her lower back again as he pulled a penlight from his pocket, shining it on the ground in front of her. “Watch your step. Rocks sometimes appear as though they rolled there themselves.”

As they walked in the starlight, the whole thing felt surreal. The heat of his hand on her back, the timbre of his voice, the same small, worn penlight illuminating the dusty path. As though the years hadn’t passed and they were back in Honduras again, feeling close and connected. She stared fixedly at the uneven path, determined to resist the gravitational pull that was Chase Bowen.

Chase shoved open a door and slipped his arm around her waist, tucking her close to his side as he led her down a short hallway. Quickly, she shook off his touch.

“Stop,” she hissed. “Drew needs to get to know you without your hands all over me.”

“Sorry. It’s so nice to touch you again, I keep forgetting.” He raised his palms to the sky, the picture of innocent surrender, and she again had the urge to punch the man who obviously knew all too well how easily he could mess with her equilibrium.

Several camp lights dully lit the room, showing Drew sitting at a high metal table, his legs dangling from a tall stool. The low light didn’t hide the melted ice cream covering the child’s face from the tip of his nose down, dripping from his chin.

“Hi, Mommy!” He flashed her a wide grin and raised the soggy cone as if in a toast, chocolate oozing between his fingers. “Dis ice cream is good!”

“I can see that.” She nearly laughed at the guilty look on Trent’s face as Drew began to lap all around the cone, sending rivulets down his arm to his elbow.

“I’ll clean him up.” Trent waved his hand towards Drew, looking a little helpless. “Didn’t see the point of it until he was done.”

“Don’t worry, making messes is what Drew does best,” she said, giving Trent a reassuring smile. “Right, honey?”

“Wight!” Drew shoved his mouth into the cone, and the softened ice cream globbed onto the table. He promptly dropped his face to slurp it straight from the flat metal surface then swirled his tongue, making circles in the melty chocolate.

“Okay, no licking the table.” Chase probably thought she’d never taught the boy manners. Hastily, she walked over to lift his wet, sticky chin with her palm. “Finish your cone, then we’ll find out where we’re sleeping. And you’d better do it quick, ‘coz it’s about to become all cream without the ice part.”

“You know, Drew,” Chase said in a jocular tone that sounded a little forced, “when you stick your tongue out like that, you look like a lizard. We have big ones around here. Maybe tomorrow we’ll look for one.”

Drew’s eyes lit and he paused his licking to look up at Chase. “Lizards?”

“Yep. Maybe we’ll catch one to keep for a day or two. Find bugs to feed it.” Chase moved from the sink with two wet cloths in his hands. His thick shoulder pressed against Dani’s as he efficiently wiped the chocolaty table with one cloth then handed it to Trent, whose expression was a comical combination of amusement and disgust.

Chase lifted the other cloth to Drew’s mouth, his gaze suddenly riveted on the little boy’s face. Their baby’s face. Still cupping Drew’s chin in her hand, Dani stared at Chase. Every emotion crossed his face that she’d long imagined might be there if he knew about his son. Within the shadowy light she imagined that through all those mixed emotions it wasn’t horror that shone through but joy. Or was that just wishful thinking?

Her breath caught, remembering how many times in the past two and a half years she’d thought about what this moment might be like. After the miracle of Drew as a newborn and when he’d cried through the night. When he’d first smiled. Crawled. Run.

Her throat closed and she fought back silly tears that stung the backs of her eyes as Chase lifted his gaze to hers, wonder filling his.

The sound of Trent clearing his throat broke the strange spell that seemed to have frozen the moment in time.

“I’m going to head to my room, you three. See you in the a.m.,” Trent said, smiling at Drew.

Heat filled Dani’s face. “I appreciate you getting him the ice cream. I don’t think there’s much doubt he enjoyed it.”

“Yeah, thanks, Trent.” Chase and he exchanged a look and a nod before Trent took off, and Dani could see the two of them were good friends. Something that often happened when working in the GPC community, but not always. Occasionally personalities just didn’t mesh and a strictly professional relationship became the best outcome.

Then there were those rare times that an intimate relationship took over your whole world.

“I think this one’s done, Lizard-Boy,” Chase said, taking what remained of the soggy cone and tossing it in the trash. He took over the clean-up with an efficiency that implied he’d had dozens of children in his life, wiping Drew’s hands then pulling Dani’s hand from her son’s chin, about to take care of his gooey face, too.

The frown on Drew’s face as he stared at the stranger washing his face while his mother stood motionless snapped her out of her stupor.

She tugged the cloth from Chase’s hand and took over. “I’m not sure if you ate the cone, or the cone ate you,” she said lightly. She rinsed it again, along with her own sticky hand, before dabbing at the last spots on Drew’s face.

“Dat’s enough, Mommy.” Drew yanked his head away as she tried for one last swipe of his chin.

Spud poked his head into the kitchen. “Everything’s ready, if you are, Dani. Tomorrow Ruth is coming to meet both of you and take care of Drew while we give you the low-down around here.”

“Great. Thanks.” She lifted Drew onto her hip and turned to Chase, inhaling a fortifying breath. “We’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yes.” His gaze lingered on Drew. When he finally looked at Dani, his eyes were hooded and his expression serious. “Tomorrow will be a big day.”

Dani awoke to a cool draft, and she realized Drew was in the process of yanking off her bed sheet.

“Hey, you, that’s not nice. I’m sleeping.”

No way could it be morning already. She pulled the covers back to her chin but Drew tugged harder.

“Get up. I hungry.”

She peeled open one eye. From the crack visible between the curtains, it looked like the sun had barely risen above the horizon. “It’s too early to be hungry.”

“Uh-uh. My tummy monsters are growling.”

Even through her sleep-dulled senses Dani had to smile. Drew loved the idea of feeding the “monsters” that growled in his stomach. “What color monster’s in there today?”

“Blue. And green. Wif big teeth.”

He tugged again. Dani sighed and gave up on the idea of more sleep. Doubtless both their body clocks were off, and no wonder. Sleeping on a plane was something she never managed to do well, but Drew had conked out both on the plane and in the car, and she’d been amazed he’d slept at all once he’d got into bed.

“All right. Let’s see what there is to eat.”

She threw on some clothes but left Drew in his Spiderman pajamas. It took a minute to remember which door led to the kitchen, and she hesitated in the hallway. Getting it wrong and ending up in someone’s bedroom was an embarrassment she didn’t need. Cautiously, she cracked open the door, relieved to see a refrigerator instead of a sexy, sleeping Chase Bowen.

“Let’s see what your monster wants,” she said, pushing the door wide as she nudged Drew inside. To her surprise, Trent was sitting at the table, sipping coffee and reading.

“When I took this job, no one told me the hours here were dawn to dusk,” Dani joked as she plopped Drew onto the same stool he’d sat on the night before.

“Spud’s a slave driver, I tell you,” Trent said with an exaggerated sigh. “Actually, I just finished up an emergency surgery. Clinic hours don’t usually start until nine. Coffee?”

He started to get up, but she waved her hand when she spied the percolator on the counter. “Thanks, I’ll grab it myself.” Last night, the darkness had obscured most of the kitchen, but this morning showed it to be big and functional, if a bit utilitarian.

“So, do you and Chase share a room?” As soon as the words left her mouth she wondered why in the world she’d asked. She stared into her cup as she poured, heat filling her face at the look of impassive assessment Trent gave her in response.

“No. The medical workers used to stay with families nearby, but they built the sleeping quarters you’re in a couple years ago, with small rooms for everyone.”

“Oh. Can you tell me where there’s oatmeal or something for Drew?”

“Top cupboard on the left. Spud fixes breakfast around eight. Chase runs every morning.” He leaned his back against the table and sipped his coffee. “But you probably know that.”

She did know. The man was a physical fitness nut. “How long have you worked with Chase?”

“We’ve worked together in the Philippines and Ghana. Been here a year. Both our commissions are up, but we’re hanging around until there are other surgeons here and we get new assignments.”

Did that mean Chase might not be here long? A sharp pang of dismay stabbed at her, which was both ridiculous and disturbing. Shouldn’t she feel relief instead? It would be so much better for Drew if Chase moved on before the two got too close.

“Mommy, I need food,” Drew said, fidgeting on his stool.

Lord, she had to be sure this whole mess didn’t distract her from the work she’d come to Africa to do. If she couldn’t even get Drew’s breakfast going, she was in serious trouble.

In a sign that their new, temporary home was practically made for her and Drew, two of his favorite foods sat in the cupboard. Dani microwaved the apple-flavored oatmeal and opened a box of raisins.

Trent got up and pulled some construction paper and crayons from a drawer to place them in front of Drew, poking a finger at his pajama top. “While your mom gets your breakfast, how about drawing me a picture of Spiderman climbing a wall?”

Wow, the man sure knew kids, and she wondered what Trent’s story was. Just as she was about to ask, he beat her to the questions.

“So, obviously you and Chase go back a while. Where did you meet?”

“Honduras.” Back then, her expectations for mission work had been so starry-eyed and naive. And the last thing she’d expected was to meet a hunky, dynamic doctor who’d knocked her socks off. Among other things.

Apparently, Trent expected more than a one-word answer, looking at her speculatively. It was pretty clear he wondered if her arrival was bad for Chase. Her stomach twisted. Who knew if this situation they were in was good or bad for any of them?

“I’d just finished my pediatric residency and wanted to do something important for a while,” she said, tucking raisins into the steamy oatmeal to make a smiley face. “Go where kids don’t get the kind of medical care we have at home.”

She didn’t add that she’d stayed months after her contract was up because she hadn’t been ready to say goodbye. Knew she’d never be ready. Until she was forced to be.

She slid Drew’s artwork aside to make room for his breakfast. He picked the raisins out one at a time and shoved them in his mouth. “He can’t see now! I ate his eyes!”

A smile touched Trent’s face as he watched Drew dig into his breakfast, but when he turned to Dani, his expression cooled.

“So, why didn’t you tell Chase? Frankly, I think that’s pretty lame.”

She gulped her coffee to swallow the burning ache in her chest that was anger and remorse combined. Who was he to judge her without knowing Chase’s attitude? Without knowing she’d had to protect her baby? Without knowing how hard it had been to leave the man she’d fallen crazy in love with?

“Listen, I—”

The kitchen door swung open and the man in question walked in, which immediately sent her pulse hammering at the thought of what lay ahead of them. Telling Drew, and what his reaction would be when he learned Chase was his daddy. What demands Chase might or might not make in being a part of his son’s life. How it all could be balanced without Drew getting hurt.

Chase filled the doorway, sweat glistening on his tanned arms and face, spikes of dark hair sticking to his neck. A faded gray T-shirt damply clung to his broad chest, his running shorts exposing his strong calves and thighs. His brows rose as he paused in mid-stride, wiping his forehead with the sleeve of his shirt.

“What is this, a sunrise party? Not used to seeing anyone in here this early.”

She tore her gaze from his sexy body to focus on wiping Drew’s chin. “Andrew needed food more than he needed sleep. Guess we’re not on West Africa time yet.”

Chase grabbed a bottle of cold water from the fridge and took a big swig as he leaned his hip against the counter, his attention fixed on Drew. Dani found herself staring as he swallowed. As his tongue licked droplets of water from his lips.

Quickly, she glanced away and swallowed hard herself. Why couldn’t she just concentrate on the serious issues that lay between them, instead of wanting to grab him and sip that water from his lips herself?

Toughening up was clearly essential, and she braved another look at him, sternly reminding herself they’d been apart way longer than they’d been together. His demeanor seemed relaxed, but she could sense the undercurrent of tension in the set of his shoulders, the tightness in his jaw. Obviously, he felt as anxious about their upcoming revelation to Drew as she did.

Trent stood. “Think I’ll get in a catnap before the clinic opens.”

“Don’t worry about getting to the clinic at nine. I can’t take how cranky you get when you’re tired,” Chase said.

“Better than being cranky all the time, like you,” Trent said, slapping Chase on the back. “See you all later.”

The kitchen seemed to become suffocatingly small as Chase stepped so close to Dani that his shoulder brushed hers. His expression told her clearly that it was showtime, and her pulse rocketed.

Why did she feel so petrified? At least a thousand times since he’d been born, she’d thought about how or if or when she’d tell Drew about his daddy. He was still practically a baby after all. Like she’d said last night, he probably wouldn’t think anything of it.

But as she looked at her little boy, the words stuck in her throat. She turned to Chase, and he seemed to sense all the crazy emotions whirling through her. The intensity on his face relaxed, his deep brown eyes softened, and he slipped his arm around her shoulders.

“I promise you it will be okay,” he said, dropping a kiss on her forehead. “No. Way better than okay. So stop worrying.”

She nodded. No point in telling him she’d been worrying since before Drew had been born, and couldn’t just turn it off now. But deep inside she somehow knew that, even though he hadn’t wanted a child, Chase would never say and do the hurtful things her own father had.

Chase released her shoulders and pulled two stools on either side of Drew’s before propping himself on one and gesturing to Dani to sit on the other. She sank onto the stool and hoped her smile covered up how her stomach churned and her heart pounded.

She wiped the last of his breakfast from Drew’s hands and face and slid his bowl aside. “Drew, you know Mommy brought you to Africa so I could work with children here. But I brought you here for another reason, too.”

Okay, so that was a total lie, and the twist of Chase’s lips showed her he was still ticked about not knowing about Drew. But she was going with it anyway, darn it.

“And that reason is … because …” She gulped and struggled with the next words. “Dr. Chase here is, um …”

She was making a complete mess of this. Drew looked at her quizzically and she cleared her throat, trying to unstick the words that seemed lodged in there.

Chase made an impatient sound and leaned forward. “What your mom is trying to say is that I’m really happy to finally meet you and be with you because—”

The door to the kitchen swung wide and Spud strode in with hurricane force. “A truck plowed down two kids walking to school. One’s pretty beat up. I have them in pre-op now.”

Chase straightened and briefly looked conflicted before becoming all business. He stood, downed the last of his water and looked at Drew, then focused on Dani, his expression hardened with frustration. “We’ll talk later.”

Spud turned to her. “Ruth is on her way to take care of Andrew,” he said. “I’ll show you the facility and the clinic schedule after he’s settled in.”

“I want to help with the injured children as soon as she gets here,” Dani said. She wasn’t about to let the drama with Chase interfere with her reason for being here in the first place, and caring for sick and injured children was a big part of that reason.

Spud inclined his head and left. Chase paused a moment next to Drew and seemed to hesitate before crouching down next to him.

Dani’s heart pinched as she saw the usually decisive expression on Chase’s face replaced by a peculiar mix of uncertainty, determination and worry.

“Later today, how about you and your mom and I go look for those lizards?”

“‘K.” Drew beamed at Chase before grabbing his crayons to scribble on his Spiderman artwork.

Chase strode to the door, stopping to give Dani a look that brooked no argument. “Plan on a little trek this afternoon.”

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