His secret past. His second chance.

Three Sisters Ranch could be his way home...

When inexperienced rancher Nicole Bell starts training her troubled mare, Fernando Montoya has just the expertise she needs. But helping Nicole brings Fernando dangerously close to revealing the secret he’d rather keep hidden: he learned the skill in prison. While the horse draws them together, can Fernando find a way to tell her the truth...and keep it from pulling them apart?

DANICA FAVORITE loves the adventure of living a creative life. She loves to explore the depths of human nature and follow people on the journey to happily-ever-after. Though the journey is often bumpy, those bumps refine imperfect characters as they live the life God created them for. Oops, that just spoiled the ending of Danica’s stories. Then again, getting there is all the fun. Find her at danicafavorite.com.

Also by Danica Favorite

Love Inspired

Three Sisters Ranch

Her Cowboy Inheritance

The Cowboy’s Faith

Love Inspired Historical

Rocky Mountain Dreams

The Lawman’s Redemption

Shotgun Marriage

The Nanny’s Little Matchmakers

For the Sake of the Children

An Unlikely Mother

Mistletoe Mommy

Honor-Bound Lawman

Discover more at millsandboon.co.uk.

The Cowboy’s Faith

Danica Favorite

www.millsandboon.co.uk

ISBN: 978-1-474-09675-1

THE COWBOY’S FAITH

© 2019 Danica Favorite

Published in Great Britain 2019

by Mills & Boon, an imprint of HarperCollins Publishers 1 London Bridge Street, London, SE1 9GF

All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. This edition is published by arrangement with Harlequin Books S.A.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, locations and incidents are purely fictional and bear no relationship to any real life individuals, living or dead, or to any actual places, business establishments, locations, events or incidents. Any resemblance is entirely coincidental.

By payment of the required fees, you are granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right and licence to download and install this e-book on your personal computer, tablet computer, smart phone or other electronic reading device only (each a “Licensed Device”) and to access, display and read the text of this e-book on-screen on your Licensed Device. Except to the extent any of these acts shall be permitted pursuant to any mandatory provision of applicable law but no further, no part of this e-book or its text or images may be reproduced, transmitted, distributed, translated, converted or adapted for use on another file format, communicated to the public, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of publisher.

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Version: 2020-03-02

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Fernando realized he’d pushed too hard with Nicole.

He’d tried so hard to get her to understand his way of thinking—and forgive him. He should have been more gentle and patient with her, rather than demanding.

“How will this stop her from biting?” Nicole asked, looking up from Snookie.

He felt Nicole’s horse tense as he felt along the ridge on her back. “Horses bite for a lot of reasons. She’s exploring, but she also knows it’s a good way to protect herself. We just have to show her that she doesn’t need to protect herself anymore.”

As Nicole nodded once again, he saw more confidence in her eyes. She seemed more open and less afraid. Like the lessons that were healing Snookie were working in Nicole’s heart, as well.

Maybe he and Nicole would never get to a place where things were good between them. But he would do everything in his power to make sure her heart didn’t get broken again...

Dear Reader,

While all of the characters and situations in this book are purely the work of my imagination, I wanted this book to honor the amazing folks in the federal corrections system who train wild mustangs, who are then sold and used by the general public. Our family has gotten to know a number of fantastic horses who came from this program, so when it was time to get our own mustangs, we knew that’s where we’d get them. These programs help both horse and human on so many levels, and I love being able to share just a little about them.

Though I’ve never been to prison, I’ve seen how it’s affected people I care about, and I also know that many of us, like Fernando, feel trapped by our pasts. God never meant for any of us to live in shame, and as Fernando and Nicole learned, we need to learn to trust God to bring us healing, especially as it often comes from unexpected places.

Wherever you’re at in life, I pray God will bring you healing for whatever you need, and you will find the freedom that comes from love.

I love connecting with my readers, so be sure to find me online:

Newsletter: http://eepurl.com/7HCXj

Website: http://www.danicafavorite.com/

Twitter: https://Twitter.com/danicafavorite

Instagram: https://www.Instagram.com/danicafavorite/

Facebook: https://www.Facebook.com/danicafavoriteauthor

Amazon: https://www.Amazon.com/danica-favorite/e/B00KRP0IFU

BookBub: https://www.BookBub.com/authors/danica-favorite

Sending love to you and yours,

Danica Favorite

Trust in the Lord with all thine heart;

and lean not unto thine own understanding.

In all thy ways acknowledge him,

and he shall direct thy paths.

—Proverbs 3:5–6

For George Funk, thanks for all of your friendship and support with our horses. I appreciate how you always answer our questions, both about our horses, and for my books. And thanks for always looking for my books to give to Julie. Our family is blessed to have your family in our lives.

And for all the inmates, trainers and staff at the Wild Horse Inmate Program in Cañon City as well as those at the Wyoming Honor Farm. We are so thankful for the incredible animals we have, thanks to the training our horses got from you. I pray your time with the horses has blessed you as it has blessed us.

Contents

Cover

Back Cover Text

About the Author

Booklist

Title Page

Copyright

Note to Readers

Introduction

Dear Reader

Bible Verse

Dedication

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Epilogue

Extract

About the Publisher

Chapter One

The foolish woman was going to get herself killed.

Fernando Montoya parked his truck and jumped out, then ran to the arena where Nicole Bell was working a bay mare. Clearly green, the mare looked terrified. Like she had no idea what was happening to her. Based on Nicole’s jerky movements, Fernando had to agree with the mare. Nicole seemed to be clueless as to what she was doing.

As he got closer, he slowed his pace, knowing that his panic would scare the horse even more. He forced himself to calm his breathing as he drew near.

“Hi, Nicole.”

He spoke quietly, softly, but Nicole spun as if he’d shouted.

“What are you doing here?” she asked.

He’d just wanted to make sure Nicole was okay.

Columbine Springs was barely twenty minutes out of his way—a short stopover on his way from Denver to southern Colorado to a new job with his uncle’s construction company. It would be another two hours to his destination, but it was worth it to take the detour. The tiny ranching town with its fertile grassland surrounded by mountains had little to recommend it, other than a faded-out sign for an ice-cream place that promised the best cones in the Rockies. No reason to stop, other than the fact that this run-down ranch just off the highway was where Nicole and her two sisters now lived.

He wouldn’t stay long, just long enough to reassure himself that Nicole’s excuses of being too busy with her new ranch to talk were true.

After all, he had a new life of his own to get to. At least that’s what he kept telling himself. The job was menial work, something a trained monkey could do, but it was all that was available to him, thanks to the inexperience of his youth.

One felony conviction. That’s all anyone saw on his employment applications, even though he’d done his time, was a hard worker and hadn’t been in any trouble in the four years since he’d gotten out. No one wanted to know the circumstances of his crime or that he was truly sorry for his mistake.

He’d give anything to right the wrongs of his past, but he couldn’t, so all he wanted to do now was find a way to build a future for himself, even if it wasn’t the future he’d planned.

Not that he could share that with Nicole. His employment woes weren’t something he shared with anyone, least of all the reasons for them.

“I was on my way to just south of Salida, where my uncle lives. Thought I’d stop by to see how you were doing. I heard you and your sisters inherited a ranch from a long-lost relative or something like that.”

Though he’d once been told Nicole’s eyes were hazel, they looked almost green with the anger flashing in them. She brushed her dark hair out of her face—it was falling out of its ponytail, and, judging from the sweat dampening the edges of her hairline, she’d been at this for a while. Though it was only May, the sun was hot, and the work hard.

“That’s right,” she said. “I’ve always wanted to get out of the city, have a few animals, live the good life.”

The tension in her voice told him her current life was anything but good. And, in the few terse conversations they’d had over the past year or so, he’d been wondering how she was really doing. Nicole hadn’t been the same since his sister, Adriana, and Nicole’s fiancé, Brandon, had run off together, leaving Nicole at the altar and dying in a car accident in the process. Nicole might say everything was fine, but she was clearly struggling.

Even in this momentary interaction, despite her anger, he knew he’d been right to stop by. Only someone with a death wish would work such a green horse in this manner. Her absolute stupidity in how she was handling the horse made him think something deeper was going on, because Nicole wasn’t stupid.

“I was worried about you,” Fernando said. “And, it seems, rightly so. That horse is dangerous, and you’ll get both of you hurt, if not killed.”

She stared at him like he was as crazy as he thought she was. “I saw this on a horse training video. It’s exactly what the trainer did.”

Similar, but not exact. He knew the training she spoke of. Had watched the same video series. “You’re holding the rope wrong. Angle the horse outside your space, rather than letting her push you around. Turn your body the other way.”

She did as he asked, and immediately the horse started to respond. Not perfectly, because the mare had already been taught bad habits, but at least Nicole was in the right position to correct her.

The horse invaded Nicole’s space and tried nipping at her, but Nicole stepped away in time.

“No,” Fernando said. “She just completely disrespected you. You never want the horse to think she’s in control. It’s also a bad sign that her response to you is to bite. You’ve got to break that habit.”

He entered the arena and took the rope. “Here. Let me show you.”

Nicole gave him control of the horse, frustration in her eyes. He went through the same exercise Nicole had been trying, establishing rapport with the horse, but not by letting the mare walk all over him.

She was a spirited one, and someone like Nicole, who had never been around horses as far as he knew, was ill suited to take care of this horse, let alone train her.

“Why are you here?” The look of loathing she gave him almost made him want to turn and run.

But he’d seen the expression before. He deserved it. After all, he’d known about Adriana’s involvement with Brandon. He’d warned Adriana against dating her best friend’s fiancé and told her she was playing with fire. Adriana had told him to mind his own business, and that she knew what she was doing.

He’d seen Nicole nearly a dozen times since finding out about Adriana and Brandon, and yet, every time he opened his mouth to try to tell her what was going on behind her back, he found the words didn’t come. He’d spent too many years fearing punishment for opening his mouth about other people’s business.

Sometimes he woke up in the middle of the night, asking himself why he hadn’t done more. He’d already shamed his family so much, first by going to prison, and now this. If he had only said something, maybe Adriana and Brandon would at least still be alive.

He couldn’t change the past, but maybe he could do something about the future. The job his uncle wanted him on wasn’t going to start for another month. But Fernando’s apartment lease was up, so he’d figured he’d head to his uncle’s early and get the lay of the land.

But he could use that time to do some good instead.

“Let me work with your horse,” he said, ignoring her question. “I can do it. You’ve already seen the results.”

Her sister Leah approached. “I agree. Shane thinks you’ve taken on too much with this horse. With the extra cattle we have this year, he doesn’t have the kind of time he needs to put into training her.”

Nicole gave an exasperated sound. “Ever since you and Shane got together, it’s always Shane this, Shane that. I thought we all agreed we didn’t need some man to rescue us. And I certainly don’t need this one.”

Her words sounded full of pain, and it made him feel worse, knowing that because of Brandon, and because of Fernando’s role in the situation, she directed her anger at all men.

But this wasn’t about him, or men, but about a horse who needed his help. “I was wrong in not telling you about Adriana and Brandon sooner, but surely you can put our personal differences aside and allow me to help you with this horse.”

Nicole glared at him. “It’s not just about that. I mean, it is. It seems like everybody thought they knew what was best for me but never once asked my opinion. Just like now. I’ve told you that I don’t want you in my life. But here you are, insisting on helping me. Can’t anyone respect the decisions I make for myself?”

He hadn’t thought of it that way. But how could he explain his genuine concern? That even though she pretended she was fine, and told everyone she was, he could see the pain in her eyes, hear it in her voice.

“I’m truly sorry for disrespecting your wishes. But you saw how the horse responded to me. I appreciate your passion for animals and that you want to work with them, so let me teach you what I know. You’ve got a great foundation by watching the videos and reading the books, but nothing can replace the real-life experience of handling a horse with someone who’s been trained to do so and learning from that expertise.”

She hesitated, then took a step forward. “Do you really think you can help me? How can I be sure you know what you’re doing? The horse’s response could have just been coincidence.”

Her voice faltered as she spoke, and he knew she wasn’t so much telling him as herself. She wanted his help, but she also wasn’t ready to admit it.

“At least give me the opportunity to try. I can talk with this Shane person and let him evaluate me.” He looked over at Leah. “From what you say, he knows about horses.”

Leah smiled at him. “Yes. Shane Jackson is my fiancé and owns the ranch next door. We rely on him for his ranching expertise. He was good friends with Helen, our ex-stepmother, who left my sisters and me the ranch when she died.”

Nicole groaned, and Leah turned to glare at her. “What’s your problem? Shane was just saying that unless you got Snookie’s tantrums under control and she stopped biting, you’ll have to get rid of her. It’s not safe to have her here with the boys. He’s the horse expert, so I fully trust his judgment where Snookie is concerned.”

Fernando remembered Leah’s two little boys, Dylan and Ryan, from Nicole’s rehearsal dinner. Cute little fellows, and though saying so would rile up Nicole further, Leah was right. The mare’s jerky movements made her too unpredictable to be around small children. He’d already seen her try to bite Nicole. A horse like that was dangerous.

“He doesn’t need to be in on our personal business,” Nicole muttered.

He knew way more personal things about Nicole than Nicole probably wanted him to know—or thought he knew. The matter of their living circumstances paled in comparison.

But he didn’t think saying so would endear him to Nicole. The mare jerked at the rope, and had it been Nicole holding her, she’d have gotten away. Nicole’s technique was too loose, and she seemed ill prepared to handle these outbursts. As it was, Fernando was going to have some killer rope burns on his hands.

He tied the horse up at the fence, then turned his attention back to Nicole.

“I don’t need to be acquainted with your personal business to know this horse needs help,” Fernando said. “I know you’ve always wanted a horse and that letting this one go would break your heart. But I agree with Shane. It’s not safe to have a horse like this around your nephews unless she gets some intensive training.”

Leah murmured something under her breath and nodded.

He’d always thought Nicole’s eldest sister was also smart, so maybe she would talk some sense into Nicole.

And maybe it was overstepping to think so, but he wasn’t sure this beautiful, fragile woman who acted so tough could stand to have her heart broken again.

* * *

Nicole fought tears at his words. But she wasn’t going to let Fernando—or anyone else—see her cry. Part of her wanted to scream at him and shake him for being such a thick-headed dolt. So he knew that giving up this horse would break her heart? And he wanted to help? Where was that help when her best friend was messing around with her fiancé?

Okay, fine. She got it. Fernando had called her time and again, begging for forgiveness and for the chance to make it up to her. So here it was. His chance to make things right.

But why did helping her horse have to be the means of fixing his guilt? What about her pain? Fernando got absolution, and she was still left alone, minus a best friend and the man she’d thought she was going to spend the rest of her life with.

People liked to say that she was better off, and she didn’t disagree. But the problem with such deep betrayal was that now she no longer knew who to trust. It wasn’t like when you became friends with someone new, they would answer the question “Are you a man-stealing backstabber?” honestly.

The only people Nicole could trust were her two sisters, Erin and Leah, and, she supposed, since Leah had fallen in love with him despite her painful past, Shane.

Which left the animals. They didn’t lie to you, steal your fiancé, sneak behind your back or keep the kind of secrets that would break your heart.

She walked over to Snookie and gave her a pat. How was she supposed to give up on this horse, a sweet mare who just needed someone to love her? True, she did have her tantrums and liked to bite. She’d broken out of her stall more times than Nicole could count. And she’d even bitten one of the boys. That was the reason Shane had told her to get rid of Snookie.

But Nicole couldn’t bear it. Something inside her said that she and Snookie belonged together, and even though everyone told her she was crazy, she could feel Snookie speaking to her the day she got her.

She needed Snookie, and Snookie needed her.

Fernando came over and took her hand, placing it on Snookie’s flank. “Give her a firm rubbing here. It will help her feel more secure. She senses your emotions, and she needs to perceive that you’re not upset with her.”

The simple change of motion brought a shift to Snookie’s posture, relaxing her.

“I’m sorry for upsetting you,” Fernando said. “I know you don’t believe me, but I’ve only ever wished the best for you.”

Nicole stared at her feet. “I wish I could believe that, but I don’t know how to believe anyone anymore.”

“I understand,” he said softly. “Maybe it’s too much to ask you to have a little faith, but would you at least give me the chance to prove it to you? I can help your horse.”

He already had, getting Snookie to respond better in just a few short interactions than she had with weeks of training. But why did it have to be him?

Just this morning she’d been praying, asking God to help her find a way to keep Snookie. She’d even gone so far as to call some of the local boarding facilities, to see if they had space for her. But word had already gotten out about her misbehaving horse, and no one wanted to take a chance on having her there, disrupting their space.

Was God’s answer to her prayer really the person she despised the most in this world?

Fernando had gone around to the other side of Snookie and was touching her in swift, firm motions, like what she’d seen on some of the horse training videos.

“I’ve already done that with her,” Nicole said.

Fernando continued the motions, not looking at her as he said, “Not enough. You can’t rush or skip any of the steps in training a horse. It’s easy to think a horse is ready, but you must exercise patience to look for signs that will tell you when they really are.”

She’d heard one of the trainers on one of the videos say something similar, but he’d only spent fifteen minutes on this part of the training.

As Fernando continued with the exercise, his hands brushed her again, and she jumped back at the unexpected jolt.

“I’ll just get out of your way,” she said.

Fernando’s dark brown eyes were all too human in the emotions she thought she spied. She walked slowly backward to the fence, not liking the idea that Fernando was anyone other than the person she’d been vilifying over the past year.

But she couldn’t help looking. Seeing the dark hair with waves that would probably be similar to the gentle curls Adriana used to hate for being too unruly to do much with put a pang in her heart over the loss of her friend. It was hard not to notice how much Fernando resembled Adriana.

It was even harder noticing how he didn’t. Like the softness and gentleness in his face, and the tenderness with which he spoke to Snookie. And to Nicole.

Adriana used to say that he was the best big brother in the whole wide world and that she didn’t know how she could ever live without him. Watching Fernando now, Nicole couldn’t help remembering all the reasons she’d loved Adriana, and it made her heart hurt to allow that crack in the walls she’d kept around herself to numb the pain.

Because that’s what no one understood. Nicole had gone from one day believing that she was marrying an amazing man, and that she couldn’t imagine having a better best friend than Adriana, to realizing that they’d both betrayed her in the worst possible way. She’d lost so much and had no idea why.

“He’s amazing, isn’t he?” Leah said, nudging Nicole. “He’s like that guy Shane took us to see, only better.”

“I’m sure we can’t afford him. We couldn’t afford the other guy,” Nicole said.

“Maybe he’ll give us a friend discount.” Leah’s voice sounded hopeful, and it hurt to realize that her sister didn’t understand the problem.

“We’re not friends,” Nicole said.

Leah sighed. “It’s not good for you to keep holding a grudge. I get it. What his sister did was terrible, and yes, it was awful of him to not tell you. But anyone can see how bad he feels, and maybe, rather than taking your grief out on him, the two of you could grieve together?”

Nicole spun to face her sister. “What are you saying?”

“Did you ever think that he’s lost someone, too? That he’s also hurting? You keep making this all about you, but maybe if you let someone else in, you’d realize that you’re not alone.”

The tenderness in Leah’s eyes made it impossible for Nicole to be angry with her. But it didn’t mean Leah was right. Yes, Leah knew what it was like to suffer tragedy, and she knew what it was like to lose someone she loved. But Nicole’s pain was different, and to suggest that Fernando would share it was absolutely ridiculous.

Leah reached out and touched Nicole’s shoulder gently. “I’m sorry if I’m pushing too hard, but even if you can’t accept that Fernando might need you just as much as you need him, you can’t deny that he’s doing wonders with your horse.”

Nicole turned around to watch Fernando work with the horse, and as she leaned against the rails, from the other side of the fence, Leah put her arm around Nicole.

Leah didn’t have to say anything, and even though Nicole was still technically mad at her sister, she knew Leah loved her. And as she relaxed into her sister’s embrace, Nicole realized that she couldn’t fight the situation anymore.

Nicole loved Snookie and desperately wanted to keep her horse. But she knew Shane was right. Snookie was a danger to her nephews. Fernando’s interaction with Snookie told her that he was probably her last hope in being able to keep the horse.

If God wanted to answer her prayers with the person who reminded her most of her heartbreak, then fine. Let Him. She’d accept Fernando’s help with Snookie, but there was no way she’d give him access to her heart.

Chapter Two

The mare pawed at the ground and tugged at the rope. Fernando had been holding her back, and she was getting impatient at being restricted. She reminded him of the horses he’d trained in prison. Straight off federal lands, the wild mustangs had to learn how to be part of the human world.

“She doesn’t like you,” Nicole said, sounding petulant as she stepped forward. “Let me take her back.”

No, Nicole didn’t like him. Her attitude toward him was less about the horse and more about her personal feelings toward him. The horse was still figuring him out, deciding whether or not she could trust him. He would earn this horse’s trust, and maybe Nicole’s.

“She’s angry that she cannot be free to do what she wants. But like a child, she must learn that we have rules to keep her safe. Once she learns that we mean her no harm, she can develop a respect for humans, and she’ll be easier to work with.”

Maybe Nicole and the horse weren’t so different.

He brought the horse in to him and began touching her. “Hey, Snookie girl. We’re going to help you learn, okay?”

Not all trainers talked to the horses, but for a long time, horses had been the only creatures Fernando could trust. Conversations with them were easier than with people.

Probably why Nicole was channeling all her grief into the run-down ranch. Though Fernando could see places on the house that had obviously been recently repaired, new fences mixed in with the old, there were also a lot of broken-down outbuildings, worn-out equipment and other signs of neglect. He knew they had inherited the ranch from a long-lost relative, but until Leah had mentioned it, he hadn’t known it was a former stepmother.

Judging from the condition of the ranch, the woman had probably been too old to take proper care of things. Though he knew that Leah and their other sister, Erin, had also gone through tragedies around the time of Nicole’s failed wedding, and it probably seemed like a good idea to all of them to escape Denver and come here for healing, he had to wonder if they’d all taken on more than they could handle.

Maybe he could help them fix things up while he was here. He had nothing better to do until the job with his uncle started in a month, and even then, he wasn’t excited about it. Unskilled labor, acting as a helper to the better-paid framers on his uncle’s crew. Though Fernando had years of construction experience, he’d been let go from his last job as a foreman with a large construction firm in Denver because he couldn’t pass the background check they needed to get clearance on one of their jobs. And he hadn’t been able to get hired elsewhere because of his record.

Though he was grateful his uncle was offering him a job, he was also a bit resentful that Sergio knew of his skill but was taking advantage of his desperation and offering him something so beneath him. Fernando would probably end up doing the job of the foreman while accepting the pay of a helper. His uncle was a known cheapskate, and he recognized Fernando had no other options.

It was too bad Fernando couldn’t get a job working with horses. Fresh out of prison, he’d tried, thinking that the horse training he’d done there would give him the necessary qualifications. And it did—to an extent. But just like with construction work, people saw the felony on his record and used it as either an excuse to pay him peanuts or not hire him. Or worse, if something went wrong, the felon was always the convenient scapegoat. So he’d gone back into construction, something he’d done since he was young, hoping that someday he’d have enough money to buy a small place and a couple of horses for himself.

The familiar motion of working the horse blocked out all the nagging thoughts. He touched Snookie’s back firmly, assuring her that he was there and he wasn’t going to hurt her. The harsh breath coming out of the horse’s nostrils slowed, and he could feel the rhythm of her heartbeat.

As he ran his hand along the horse, looking for sensitive places, she tensed up under his touch. A couple of unusual places for most horses, but to Fernando, they told a story. A sad story of someone who had asked too much, too soon, and hurt her when he didn’t get it.

“Who hurt you, girl?” he asked softly, touching her in another way to comfort her. He said a prayer that God would guide him and lead him as he helped her. Lord, show me exactly what I need to do to help this horse.

As he began the process of earning her trust, he could feel her leaning in and trusting him more. He continued bringing her through the exercises. She was a smart horse, a good horse, and she already knew all the things he was trying to teach her.

Snookie calmed down, and once she had settled, he knew it was time to stop.

He turned to Nicole. “We should put her away for the day. She’s been worked hard, but we’re in a good place.”

She stared at him. “What just happened there? I’ve seen things like that on videos, but never in person.”

“That was amazing,” Leah said, coming around Nicole. “I’ve never seen that horse so calm.”

He gave a quick nod to acknowledge Leah’s compliment, even though he’d done nothing special. Anyone trained to work with mustangs could have done what he just did, but it seemed rude to say so.

Nicole frowned. “How do you even have experience with horses? Adriana said the only horses you were interested in were under a car’s hood.”

He figured he’d get this question, but he wasn’t ready to answer it.

“There are a lot of things you don’t know about me, just as I’m sure there are things I don’t know about you. I’ve spent a great deal of time working with horses, and I’ve been trained by some of the best. Maybe if we took some time to learn about each other...”

Nicole’s face darkened. “I don’t want to get to know you. I thought I made it very clear that I don’t want you in my life. You’re just here to help Snookie.”

His only concern was with making sure she was safe. But it was hard not to take her attitude toward him as a challenge. A defiant horse was often a hurting horse. Which made him wonder if her treatment of him was about her deeper pain. Could he help Nicole as well as the horse?

Even though she’d just told him she only wanted his help with Snookie, he couldn’t help but smile in response to her words.

* * *

Of all the nerve.

She’d just told him she didn’t want him here, and he’d smiled. Smiled!

“Let’s get Snookie put away,” he said. “And we can worry about the rest later.”

She’d have liked to have come back with a snappy retort or something, but Nicole could tell that her irritation was grating on her sister’s nerves. Leah had questioned her negativity earlier, and it wasn’t really directed at her sister, but she’d taken it that way.

Mostly, Nicole’s life was good. Other than the fact that she was still struggling with her fiancé and best friend running off together and getting themselves killed. Oh yeah, and they’d been carrying on behind her back for months.

Fernando could’ve saved her a whole lot of humiliation and heartbreak, and maybe even kept Brandon and Adriana from dying because they wouldn’t have needed to run off together in the middle of the night. They could’ve just been together in the open, because Nicole would’ve dumped Brandon’s sorry self and told Adriana thanks but no thanks.

But apparently, Fernando wasn’t willing to give her credit for being strong enough to deal with that information. Clearly, he didn’t think she could handle her horse, either. But he’d already proven that he knew way more about horse training than she did, so she couldn’t tell him to bug off.

“Her stall’s this way,” Nicole said, taking the rope out of his hands and leading the horse. He might have shown some skill in training, but this was her horse.

Fernando nodded and stepped in line behind her.

Why did he have to be so agreeable? It was like he knew she was only grudgingly allowing him to be here, and he was doing his best to make her like him.

She took a deep breath and willed the threatening tears to stay back. She wouldn’t cry over this. Especially not in front of anyone else. Nicole’s job in the family had always been to make them smile. Maybe it wasn’t her official title, but that’s what she knew her sisters counted on her for. Being cheerful, happy and the life of the party.

Maybe that was who she used to be, but it wasn’t who she was anymore. The animals were the only safe things in her life. More important, they weren’t telling her what to do, how she should live her life. They just let her be her, without judging her.

Fernando opened the barn door for her, a task she could have done on her own, but he seemed determined to prove that he could help her.

So Fernando felt bad about what happened? Good for him. Maybe he thought that by doing a few good deeds for Nicole, everything would be all right. But it didn’t work that way. And even though everything that happened technically wasn’t his fault, it was nice to have someone to blame, since the real people she was mad at were dead.

She led Snookie into her stall and removed the halter. “There you go, girl. Nice job today. Are you ready for your supper?”

It was tempting to add that the silly horse was a traitor, falling so easily for her sworn enemy’s charms. Because he was charming. And once, back when her life seemed simpler, she’d even joked to Adriana that were Nicole not happily engaged, she’d have thought Fernando a hottie.

“I can help, if you like. Two flakes of hay?”

Once again, Fernando was trying to be helpful. Were it any other person, she wouldn’t feel so much resentment about his assistance. In fact, she’d be grateful.

But this was the man who symbolized all her pain.

And yes, she knew all the classic psychological speak for everything going on. People acted like she was stupid because she was a preschool teacher. But she did have her master’s, and she’d taken enough psychology courses in the process to grasp all the technical details about what she was dealing with. All the classic stages of grief.

“Yes,” she muttered, trying not to sound like such an ingrate. Were a stranger to peek into her life, they might think she was a horrible person for how she was treating Fernando.

In a way, she kind of felt that way about herself. But the pain in her heart was like a throbbing headache that only got worse when Fernando was near. Right now, it was like the kind of migraine that made you throw up.

Once Snookie was fed, Leah invited Fernando into the house for a glass of iced tea while they waited for Shane to come over, making the pain in Nicole’s heart even worse. Throwing up was almost an option. But instead, Nicole smiled. And she meekly followed them into the house, keeping the smile firmly planted on her face while figuring out how she was going to handle accepting help from the person she despised the most.

No, it probably wasn’t the most healthy thing for her to be doing, but it felt a whole lot better than falling apart over something that could never be fixed.

Fortunately, Shane didn’t take too long in arriving.

“Sorry I couldn’t get here sooner. The fence on the back pasture is down in a few spots, and I wanted to get it fixed before you guys moved the herd there tomorrow.”

Shane’s engagement gift to Leah had been a herd of cattle that had initially come between them but was now what the sisters had hoped would be the start of turning their property back into a real working ranch. Which seemed like an impossible dream, considering they only had one horse, and that horse was not yet able to work the ranch. But on their budget, finding what Shane called a good horse seemed next to impossible.

Leah gave Shane a quick hug and kiss. “Oh, good. Erin took the boys over to the Double R Ranch to borrow a couple of ATVs so we can get the herd moved.”

Then Leah gestured at Fernando. “I want you to meet Fernando Montoya, an old family friend who says he can help with Snookie.”

Nicole would have liked to have argued with Leah about the old family friend part, but since Shane and Fernando were already exchanging pleasantries, it seemed like it would just be an act of meanness to do so. Especially since Leah looked so happy.

It was nice that Leah had found a man she could trust after her disastrous first marriage. Her husband had become addicted to painkillers after a skiing accident then died of a drug overdose, leaving Leah and her children destitute.

Even their sister, Erin, who also had a terrible first marriage, seemed to believe that love was possible again. Nicole wasn’t so sure.

As Shane and Fernando talked, Leah led her into the other room.

“I’m sorry if this seems presumptuous, and maybe it isn’t the right thing. But I’m really worried about you and the horse. Is there something else that happened with Fernando you haven’t told me? I’ve always thought that you’ve treated him unfairly and were punishing him unjustly. Like I said earlier, I think it would be good for both of you to spend some time together and deal with your mutual grief.”

She smiled at her sister. “I’ve dealt with my grief. I’m fine. I just don’t need the constant reminders of my perfect life falling apart and having no clue.”

She glanced in the direction of the kitchen, noting that Fernando and Shane appeared to be in a very deep conversation. Like they were getting along. But that was the trouble. Great that they were friends. But did anyone think about what it meant to her?

What did Fernando think he had to gain in this situation? If he felt so bad about his sister’s cheating, then why hadn’t he just told her to begin with? Why had he let her be played for a fool, when apparently everyone else seemed to know? Her family hadn’t, but they’d been dealing with their own stuff.

Every time she thought she was over it, Fernando had to step in and remind her. Even worse, he’d just shown her that the one thing that had been bringing her comfort after everything—working with this horse—was just one more mistake she’d made.

The men walked out of the kitchen, and she pasted a smile on her face.

“He’s good,” Shane said. “I’m really impressed with his horse knowledge. You’d be blessed to get a trainer like him. He’s promised that he’ll work with you and teach you. You’ll still do most of the training yourself, but with his guidance.”

Then his gaze landed firmly on Nicole. “I stand by what I said the other day. Unless Snookie gets proper training, she has to go.”

Even though Shane had told her this before, it felt like the knife was being driven in even deeper.

“I’m sorry, Nicole,” Shane said gently, looking at her like he did the boys when he was trying to be compassionate. “This is why I warned you not to fall in love with an animal just because it was pretty. I told you not to buy her, so now that you’ve got her, you need to do the right thing. Get her properly trained or give her to someone who can handle her.”

She knew what he was referring to. The Springs Haven Animal Rescue was just a few miles outside the other end of town. They provided homes for abused and neglected animals, as well as animals that were surrendered by owners who could no longer care for them. She’d vowed not to be that kind of owner, someone who promised a home to an animal, then gave it up when the going got rough. Besides, at the last fund-raiser for the animal rescue, Margaret Cooke, the owner, had told people that she wasn’t sure she’d have the funding to keep it going much longer. If the rescue closed, what would happen to Snookie? Shane looked regretful at reminding her of that option, but she knew that the boys’ safety was his primary concern.

Fernando gave her a smile. “All is not lost. I think she’s a good horse, very smart. But she’s scared. Even though you’re doing your best by her, your actions are making her more fearful because they’re inconsistent with her nature.”

Her fault. Wow. So much for thinking she could do the right thing.

But before she could even process the thought, Fernando stepped into her space and spoke quietly. “Don’t be hard on yourself. You meant well, and most people would’ve made the same mistakes you have.”

She nodded slowly, fighting the tears. This horse was supposed to help her, and she was supposed to help it. And together, they were going to help each other.

He touched her arm lightly. “Let me help you help this horse. I believe you can do it. I know there is love in your heart for her, so let’s get her to see it, too.”

The last thing she ever wanted in her life was to have Fernando here. To have Fernando be a part of the peace she’d so carefully built around her heart.

But as she looked out at the barn, she knew she didn’t have a choice. Her last hope, her only hope, was this man. She didn’t like it, but how could she let this beautiful horse down?

Even though she’d already decided to let Fernando help her, she knew everyone else thought she was being difficult and needed convincing. But they didn’t understand the emotional cost of admitting out loud that someone she held partially responsible for her pain was the right person to help her horse.

* * *

Fernando hated the way Nicole looked at him. Like he’d just taken a whip to poor Snookie himself.

But she had to understand the importance of the situation. Of doing the right thing by this horse.

“All right,” Nicole said. “You can help with my horse.”

Her tone was like that of someone agreeing to a root canal. But at least it meant he could stick around for a while. Figure out what happened to the woman who’d lost the light he’d once seen shining in her eyes.

Horses had saved him from a very dark period in his life. Maybe, if Nicole had the same chance he was given, she could find a new reason to be happy. A new reason to smile again, and not have it look like it caused her pain to contort her face in such a way.

The door opened, and Nicole’s sister Erin walked in, followed by Leah’s two sons, Dylan and Ryan.

“Fernando,” Erin said, smiling in the fake way Nicole had been doing. “What brings you here?”

“I’m going to help Nicole train Snookie,” he said. Nicole could fill her in on the rest. By the way Erin looked at him, it was clear she shared Nicole’s anger at him.

“I see,” Erin said. “Boys, why don’t you get cleaned up for supper, then we can tell your mom all about what you saw at Mr. Ricky’s.”

The two boys raced past him, barely acknowledging him. He turned and watched them leave, appreciating their zest for life.

Fernando had once hoped to have a family of his own. But who would marry someone who’d been to prison? When he’d been arrested, Destiny, his fiancée, had told him she’d stand by him. But once they realized that the authorities were going to make an example of him, she’d slowly pulled away. Until she finally confessed she was embarrassed to admit he was in prison and didn’t want her future children to face the same stigma. Every time he dated a woman and that fact came out, she lost interest.

Still, it bothered him to think that some of his most treasured dreams would never come true.

“Don’t get any ideas,” Nicole said, coming up behind him. “Even if you manage to befriend the rest of my family, you and I are never going to be friends.”

“That’s kind of harsh, don’t you think?” Shane stepped forward. “I know you’re mad at Fernando for keeping things secret from you, but maybe you should give him the chance to explain, to see things from his side.”

Leah put her arm around Shane’s waist. “Exactly. I don’t think it was right for Fernando to not tell you about Adriana’s affair with Brandon, but having seen him with Snookie, and how hard he’s trying to do the right thing here, I have to believe that there’s more to the story. Give him a chance.”

Instead of Leah’s words being encouraging to Nicole, they only seemed to make Nicole’s face scrunch up, like she was trying not to tell Leah exactly what she thought of her sisterly advice. But then, just as quickly as the anger filled her face, the fake smile returned.

“I’m letting him train my horse, aren’t I? As for why, I don’t care. I just want to get my horse trained, and then both Fernando and I can move on with our lives. Separately.”

Fine by him. It wasn’t like he and Nicole had a future together. And the more she reminded him of it, the less tempted he was to wish his life were different.

“Whatever you want,” Fernando said. “I’m only trying to help. I’d leave now, except that I want to work with Snookie. Can we call a temporary truce for her sake?”

Crazy to think that a horse would be the thing they could find common ground on.

“Fine.” Nicole turned and glared at Leah. “But don’t think this means anything.”

Leah was obviously happy with Shane, and from what he knew of Leah losing her first husband, Fernando was glad to see her get a second chance at love. Hopefully, Leah’s example would show Nicole that not all men were like Brandon, and that she, too, could find happiness.

Except, instead of that thought making Fernando feel good for Nicole, it made his heart hurt a little bit at the thought of her with anyone else. Crazy, since he couldn’t have her for himself. He wanted her to be happy. And he prayed for the man who could do it.

Shane cleared his throat. “There’s also the small item of payment. While you said you were happy to do it for free, it wouldn’t be right for us to not pay you.”

Not this again. They’d already argued about it in the kitchen, and Fernando thought it was the end of things. But obviously, Shane had another plan. Which, by the expression on Nicole’s and her sisters’ faces, was exactly where this conversation was going.

“I agree,” Erin said. “We’ve budgeted for horse training.”

Then Erin sighed. “Probably not what you’re used to getting, but...”

“I’m not used to being paid for working with horses,” Fernando said. “I do construction for a living.”

Nicole gave him a funny look. “That’s right, you do. Why are you going to Salida? Isn’t that where your creepy uncle lives? Adriana once told me that you wouldn’t work for him for a million dollars.”

That was when he had a good job and he thought they valued him, despite his record.

“I got laid off,” he said quietly, grateful they’d at least done that for him. The uncomfortable silence made him wish he hadn’t said anything, but he didn’t want to lie, either.

Finally, Shane said, “Training Snookie isn’t going to be a full-time job for you. Since you’re in construction, maybe you could help with some of the things around here. I’ve been doing what I can, but with my own ranch, I can’t do as much as I’d like.”

“Yes,” Leah added. “We also have money in the budget to pay for some of the repairs, but getting anyone to come out here is really tough.”

He studied Nicole’s face, trying to gauge her reaction. She already didn’t want him here.

“It would keep him out of my hair,” she said.

There were worse answers, he supposed.

“And we still haven’t gotten that chicken coop fixed,” Erin added. “It’s too smelly to breathe in there.”

Nicole giggled. “So basically, give him all the stuff we don’t want to do?”

If she thought cleaning up a bunch of chicken manure was going to scare him away, she obviously hadn’t heard enough stories about his uncle from Adriana. The only stories Adriana probably hadn’t told Nicole were the ones about him. His entire family was ashamed of his time in prison, and all they ever told anyone about his seven-year absence was that he was off finding himself.

He had found himself. In a lot of unexpected ways. It just hadn’t been the youthful lark everyone made it sound like. He might have been young and stupid, but at eighteen, he’d been legally an adult and paid adult consequences.

“I’d be happy to,” Fernando said. “I can tell this place needs some improvements, and I’m familiar with the work. It won’t be a problem. Just give me a list, and I’ll take care of it.”

They discussed his wage, and while it was more than reasonable, Fernando couldn’t help wishing they’d found a way to disagree. But he couldn’t, in all fairness, ask for more, which would have been the only way they wouldn’t have come to an agreement.

Shane looked over at Fernando. “Why don’t you come with me? Leah and I were talking about the apartment over the barn. I stayed there when I first came to Columbine Springs years ago, and it hasn’t been used since. We were going to fix it up as guest quarters.”

He looked apologetic, but then shrugged. “It needs some work, but it’s habitable.”

Fernando nodded at the man’s thoughtfulness, but he looked over at Nicole to see how she felt about the idea. Her face was expressionless, which was a good sign, considering the hostility she’d once had toward him.

“Thanks. I was going to go look for a hotel or something. But if it’s not too much of an imposition, that would be great.”

Shane chuckled. “There isn’t much in Columbine Springs. We had some city folks try to establish a B&B, but they didn’t last long. There was an old hotel, but it’s been closed now for at least ten years.”

He liked Shane. He hoped they could be friends, but just as he had the idea, he dismissed it as being stupid. He didn’t want to establish ties here if it would cause Nicole more pain. Yes, she had to deal with her grief. But he knew he was walking a fine line, and he wasn’t going to insert himself into her life any further than was healthy for her.

Or for him.

It wasn’t just Adriana’s actions he didn’t understand but Brandon’s. Despite her obvious faults, his sister had been a great person, but in a way, Nicole was even better. She represented everything he wanted in a woman. She was smart, funny, kind to children and animals, and she had a zest for living that had always inspired him. How could Brandon have treated her so badly?

Maybe that’s why he’d been trying so hard to help Nicole. He’d always admired her, and seeing how bitter she’d become bothered him.

No, he didn’t think he stood a chance at her heart. No woman should be stuck with a guy like him. As an ex-con, he couldn’t give any woman the kind of life she deserved. Especially someone as wonderful as Nicole.

Or at least as Nicole had been.

Was that woman still inside?

As Shane led him out to the barn, Snookie neighed, reminding him of the other reason he was here.

Snookie was where he had to stay focused. He could help the horse. Nicole—that was something he had to leave alone.

Chapter Three

Nicole went into the small apartment above the barn, carrying some linens Leah had asked her to bring over for Fernando. After everything that had been said earlier, she didn’t really want to talk to him, but her sisters had made it clear she had to stop running from the pain. She still wasn’t sure what to say to him.

The apartment wasn’t what you would call luxury lodgings, but Fernando had said he didn’t mind and had even promised to help fix it up. Which made Nicole feel like even more of a jerk for not welcoming him with open arms. He’d done everything he could to be nice, and she kept shoving him away.

But how did one welcome the reminder of your biggest mistakes with joy? He didn’t answer her knock on the door, and she remembered hearing that he’d wanted to take a walk later. When she let herself in, she saw him sound asleep, sprawled out on the bare mattress. She looked down at the bundle of sheets and blankets she’d brought. Moving as quietly as possible, she carried them to the dresser. But as she set them on top, Fernando yelled, “I didn’t do it! Leave me be.”

She turned, but Fernando was still fast asleep, tossing and turning on the bed.

“I didn’t tell. It wasn’t me! I promise, I didn’t help.”

He was having a bad dream. And from the way he thrashed about, it was a terrible one.

“Please. I beg you. Don’t do this. It wasn’t me.”

Should she wake him? She took a step toward him, and the board creaked.

Fernando sat bolt upright. “What?”

He seemed wide awake now.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. I just brought you some linens.”

He nodded slowly as he looked around the room.

“It’s all right,” she told him, wanting to comfort him like she did her nephews when they had nightmares, but not feeling so generous as to want to give him a cuddle the way she did with the boys.

Then he looked at her more closely. “You look like you just saw something terrifying. Was I talking in my sleep again?”

Nicole nodded slowly. “I wasn’t afraid of you, though. I was afraid for you. It seemed like you were having the most awful dream.”

He ran his fingers through his hair as he nodded. “Sí. I mean, yes. What did I say?”

He looked so out of sorts, it seemed almost impossible to withhold compassion.

She walked over and sat on the edge of the bad, near him, but not next to him. “You can use Spanish around me if you want. Adriana did sometimes, and she was trying to teach me a few words.”

Then she shook her head. “I don’t know why I just said that. That was dumb of me.”

Especially the part about Adriana. She’d done her best to forget about her former best friend, and it was weird the way the memory came back up so quickly. Part of why she hadn’t wanted Fernando around in the first place. She didn’t need the reminders. But he was here now, and she had to deal with it.

He shook his head slowly. “Thanks. I don’t...”

Fernando seemed unsure of himself, hesitant. And she didn’t blame him. After all, she’d done everything she could to make him feel unwelcome, and now that he was clearly in the middle of something disturbing, he wouldn’t find her very comforting. And honestly, she wasn’t sure she wanted to be that person for him.

“I’m sorry.” She stood, then gestured at the blankets. “I was going to try to soothe you or something, but I can’t imagine that you would feel comforted by me. I haven’t been very nice to you, and I don’t exactly have warm feelings toward you.”

Even as the admission came out, she knew there was one more thing she had to do. Not that she liked it much.

“My sisters say I owe you an apology,” she said.

“But you disagree.” There was no judgment in his voice, no anger. Just acceptance.

She shrugged. “Obviously.”

He nodded slowly as he yawned, then ran his hands over his face.

“Sorry. I guess I was more tired than I thought.” He stood, then came next to her. “Listen. You don’t owe me anything. But we do have to get to a place where we can stop rehashing the fact that you’re angry with me for not telling you about Adriana and Brandon and move forward to a place of understanding. I know forgiveness is hard, and I’m not asking you to do it right away. But it has to happen at some point, even if only for your own peace of mind. You know the quote about unforgiveness being like drinking poison while waiting for the other person to die?”

Factually, she knew all of this to be true. It wasn’t like she didn’t know that she was only hurting herself by not forgiving him. That God wanted her to forgive him. But there was so much injustice in the situation, and it didn’t seem right that no one had been held accountable to her for their actions.

“I get that. I do, I promise.” He’d been nothing but nice to her. Even Leah, who had always been angry on her behalf, was warming to him because of how nice he was.

“You just have to understand,” Nicole said. “I didn’t find out until I was on my way to the church to be married. The perfect man, the perfect friend, all at once, they were lost to me. And they died before I could even ask them why. Before I could confront them and tell them what a terrible thing it was that they did to me.”

“So you took it out on me instead.”

“It’s all I had.”

Her confession was more cathartic than she’d thought it would be. But she still needed answers.

“Even though we sort of agreed not to rehash this, in all the apologies you’ve given me, you’ve never told me why. Why didn’t you tell me about Adriana and Brandon?”

He looked down at the ground, then back up at her. “I didn’t think it was my place. I talked to Adriana, and I tried convincing her to do the right thing. If it’s any consolation, I don’t think she meant to hurt you. I think that’s why she wouldn’t tell you.”

He let out a long sigh, and for the first time, she recognized the torment on his face.

“Your niece had recently died, and so shortly after your brother-in-law’s death. Adriana told me that she didn’t think you would be able to handle it. She asked me to trust her. That she would take care of things, but I needed to be patient. I didn’t know what that meant. But where I come from, you stay out of other people’s business. Trust me when I say that butting in has cost me a lot in my life.”

She looked down at the ground, then back up at him.

Because she’d always refused to meet him, or even talk to him about this, she’d never seen this look of regret on his face. Never heard the pain in his voice.

All the times she’d hung up on him, refused to take his calls, raged against him, she’d missed seeing his level of brokenness. She’d never realized that as much as she had been hurting, he had been hurting, too.

Suddenly, Fernando’s decision to keep Adriana’s secret didn’t seem so awful. Just really unfair that she had to be the victim.

“I get it,” Nicole said. “You were caught in the middle. Between someone you loved and doing the right thing.”

He nodded slowly. “Keeping secrets is a terrible burden, but so is knowing who and what to tell. My only hope is that in time, you can forgive me, forgive them, and move on with your life.”

It should be easy for her to just say, “I forgive you,” but it wasn’t that simple. She could say the words, but she was a long way from feeling that peace in her heart.

“I’m not there yet,” she said, hoping that honesty was the best policy here. Of all the things she’d wished since she’d found out about Brandon and Adriana, her greatest desire had been for people to just be honest with her. It seemed like everyone danced around the truth, afraid of hurting people. And maybe the truth did hurt sometimes, but it always came out, and it seemed to hurt far more having it hidden so long.

“They make it sound easy in church, don’t they?” Fernando looked at her sympathetically, like it didn’t bother him to hear forgiveness wasn’t going to come easily. But considering she’d told him she’d hate him forever several times, he probably wasn’t expecting even this.

She nodded. “Yeah. And even though Jesus tells us that we should forgive seventy times seven, I’m really struggling with just once. But it makes me feel good to know that you’re willing to be patient with the process.”

Even that was a breakthrough for her, considering that until now, she hadn’t wanted to forgive him.

He walked over to the dresser and picked up the sheets. “Thank you for bringing these. And thank you for letting me stay. If there were any hotels in town, I’d have stayed there.”

“Nearest one is about thirty minutes down the road. But I wouldn’t let my worst enemy stay there.”

He gave her a smile that made her tingle down to the very bottom of her toes. “Well, at least I have that going for me. You don’t like me, but I’m not your worst enemy.”

The few times that she’d met Fernando when he was with his sister, she’d thought he had a nice sense of humor, a good smile, and was a lot of fun to be around. She’d liked him even then, and had, for a brief period, thought they were friends. But either she had been mistaken in her beliefs about him, or neither one of them understood what friendship really was.

Still, it was weird, feeling this warming toward him. It wasn’t just the sympathy she’d felt for him upon coming to see him in the room; it was almost like attraction. But that was crazy. She couldn’t be, wouldn’t be, attracted to someone who’d done so much damage in her life.

Fernando unfolded one of the sheets. “Can you take the other end and help me?”

When she reached to take the end of the sheet out of his hands, her fingers brushed his, and she felt that same weird jolt she had earlier with the horse. She jumped slightly, and Fernando looked at her.

“Static electricity,” she said. It had to be. There couldn’t be any other explanation.

She turned to Fernando and smiled as she smoothed the sheet over her side of the bed. “So that nightmare. It seemed pretty bad. Do you have it often?”

Fernando kept his attention on the bed. “Often enough. Nothing to worry about. Thank you for asking. Why don’t you tell me about the ranch, why you’re here, your plans for it?”

* * *

When Nicole launched into the story of inheriting a ranch from her former stepmother, Fernando breathed a sigh of relief. Though part of him appreciated Nicole’s compassion and the indication of her softening toward him, deep inside, he was shaking.

They’d just gotten to a place where she was beginning to warm to the idea of forgiving him. How would that change when she knew about his past, which was what he’d been dreaming about?

He was so tired of the inevitable rejection that came with his admission of having gone to prison. No one looked at him the same, and no matter what he said in his defense, people shut down at the word felon.

He took a deep breath and focused on Nicole as she spoke. The light in her that he remembered from before her failed wedding had returned, and he couldn’t help thinking about what a beautiful woman she was.

Even though the apartment above the barn had plenty of windows, suddenly the space felt too confining. It wasn’t good for him to sit here, thinking about all the things he liked about her.

“Why don’t you show me around,” he said, standing and holding his hand out to her.

Nicole stood but didn’t take his hand. He hadn’t expected her to, but it had seemed right to make the gesture. She led him outside.

It felt good to be out in the open air, where he could breathe. That was one of the things he’d loved about being in the horse training program in prison. The chance to be outside, in nature, with horses.

He followed Nicole to a run-down chicken coop.

“I really want chickens,” she said. “We got some when we first came, but the coop isn’t very secure, and a fox got in. Plus, Shane says that we should clean it out in case of disease.”

As he entered the coop, he pulled his shirt over his nose. Erin hadn’t been joking about the place being smelly. He could definitely see why Shane wanted it cleaned out before getting more chickens.

“It sounds like Shane has been really helpful,” he said.

“I know I sounded cranky about him earlier, so I should apologize. I have nothing against Shane. He’s wonderful, and he has been a big help. But more than that, he makes my sister happy, and the boys love him.”

Nicole kicked a rock. “I guess I’m just frustrated sometimes that this was supposed to be our adventure—mine and my sisters’—and then Leah had to go and fall in love. I’m happy for her, but I really was looking forward to the three of us rebuilding the ranch.”

After latching the coop back up to prevent anything else from getting in, Fernando turned to her. “But maybe that is the adventure. Bringing new people into your lives to share it with.”

He gestured around at the property in general. “This is so big, I can’t imagine anyone doing it alone. It’s good that you have help. Why are you fighting it?”

Nicole shrugged, then shook her head. “I don’t know. It was probably stupid of me to say anything. Let me show you where I want to put the goats.”

Once again, she was shutting down and shutting him out. Part of him regretted saying anything, except that it gave him another peek into her heart. It was like she was afraid of being vulnerable, and in some ways, he didn’t blame her.

As he followed her, he made note of the other things that were in need of repair. He’d put together his own list, then talk to the family about it. Based on what Nicole had said about being unprepared for chickens, and as well as her decision to buy a horse against Shane’s advice, he was fairly certain that they would need help prioritizing projects.

“It’s great that you have so many plans,” he said when they finally stopped at a large, ramshackle barn. “I remember you saying that you’ve always wanted animals, but I never saw you as the type to move to a ranch in the middle of nowhere.”

The smile she gave him was warm and genuine. “When I was a kid, I used to always play farm. But because we moved around so much for the Colonel’s job, it wasn’t practical to have pets. Then real life happened, and still, no animals. I managed to have a few in my preschool classroom—fish, hamsters, even a snake once. But I’ll admit that our field trips to the petting zoo were more fun for me than they were for the kids.”

“The Colonel? Who is that?” He thought he knew about Nicole’s family, but he hadn’t heard mention of the Colonel before.

“Our father.” Nicole let out a long sigh. “He was in the military and ran his household like it. We were his troops, not his children, and we took to referring to him as the Colonel when we got older. I know that sounds disrespectful, but he wasn’t much of a father.”

He reached out to touch her arm in comfort, but she jerked away.

“I don’t want your pity. It’s fine. My sisters and I accepted long ago that we were all each other had. I know you think you’re trying to be there for me, but I have them, and that’s all I need.”

And yet, she did need him. At least for her horse.

“I’m sure you can take care of yourself, but it doesn’t make you weak to let others in,” Fernando said.

“Maybe not,” she admitted. “But I spent most of my life knowing that the only people I could count on were my sisters. And the first time I took a risk in trusting someone new, I found myself burned beyond recognition.”

She reached forward and touched his arm gently. “I can tell you want to help, and I appreciate the gesture. I’m grateful that you’re willing to train my horse. I’m also grateful that you’re willing to help fix things around here. We tried hiring laborers, but it’s hard to compete with the larger ranches who can pay more.”

He knew the but was coming even before the expression hit her face and the words left her mouth.

“But that’s all I want from you. I got the answers I needed. You don’t owe me anything else. So please stop trying to be my friend and asking me questions beyond what you need to know to do your job.”

Nicole’s brow furrowed, like she realized that she’d been a little too harsh with him.

“It’s just too confusing for me right now to talk about personal things,” she finally said. “I don’t like this angry version of myself, but when I’m around you, I can’t help it. I let my guard down, and then I remember that I’m still mad at you, even though I’m trying to get past it. The emotions that take over are hard for me to handle. I’m sorry.”

Her admission made him realize that maybe he’d been pushing her too hard. All this time, his need for her to forgive him was all about him making things right. Even though he’d assumed that the right thing for Nicole was to let go of the past, he hadn’t taken the time to understand her actual needs. He’d assumed a lot on her behalf, starting with when he’d decided to keep Adriana’s secret from her, continuing to now.

“It’s okay,” Fernando said. “I know I’ve been pushing you hard. You’ve been asking me for space, and I haven’t given it to you. I’m sorry. I’ll do better in the future.”

She nodded slowly, and he could see her posture relax slightly.

He gestured to the barn they’d stopped in front of. “Do you want to tell me about your plans for this? I assume it was used to store hay and other equipment in the past, but it looks like it’s in need of a lot of TLC.”

The rest of her resistance melted away as she led him to the entrance. “Shane says the bones are still strong, but it does need a lot of repairs. My sisters and I were thinking we could use it as an event center, like for destination weddings or something. Ricky, our neighbor at the Double R, has a dude ranch, but he doesn’t have a facility his guests can use for their events. This would help both of our businesses grow.”

As Nicole explained their plans for the barn, Fernando could see where, of all the projects, this would be the one that would provide the best long-term benefit.

“I like your plans a lot,” Fernando said when she finally finished. “If you don’t mind, I’m going to take a better look at everything and I’ll come up with a list. Then you and your sisters can tell me what your priorities are and where you can best use me.”

The look she gave him was less grudging than she’d been with him in the past. Even though they’d been in two totally different situations, he could almost relate. Until this point, he’d taken the control of their relationship away from her. He’d kept valuable information about her fiancé and best friend from her. He’d continued contacting her when she’d asked him to give her space. He’d forced her hand with Snookie. Now, she had a choice.

Whatever she decided, Fernando was going to respect it.

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