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Her lawyer’s sense of justice kicked in, pointing out that, by the same token, he had to be equally at sea with her. He was likely trying to read between the lines to discover all that she wasn’t saying, so for now she should give him the benefit of the doubt.
She drew in a breath and said, “Two babies, actually.”
His eyes widened. “Twins?”
“Yes.”
He sat back with a thud. “Okay, we’re having two babies.” A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth and he seemed lost in thought for a moment before returning his focus to her. “How are you? Any morning sickness?”
Instinctively, she laid a hand over her stomach. “Only a little. I’m a bit queasy in the face of milk and greasy things, but not too bad.”
“Does the doctor say everything is okay?” His gaze flicked from where her hand rested on her belly and back again.
“She said everything is perfectly normal.” She tapped her fingers against her thigh, unsure of what else to say, then remembered that she had something she could show him. “I have a picture from the sonogram. Would you like to see it?”
He grinned. “You bet.”
She pulled the printout from inside the pages of a large hardcover book on the coffee table and handed it to him. Since her appointment, she’d spent so much time staring at this picture in wonder. It was almost surreal—they were her babies, growing inside her right this minute. Despite knowing so little about them, her love for these tiny beings was so strong, it enveloped her, vibrating with power, practically a living thing itself.
Speaking past the emotion that filled her throat, she pointed out the same things the doctor had highlighted to her, then waited, fingers laced, while Nick had a moment to absorb the first image of their children.
When he handed it back, his eyes had misted over. “Thank you. That’s...incredible.”
She blinked back tears before they could fully form. “It is, isn’t it?”
“If it’s okay with you,” he said, eyebrows drawn together, “I’d like to be at your future appointments.”
The sense of unease returned. They were his babies, too—he had a right to know how they were doing. And of course she’d dreamed of having someone there to share the excitement and the fears, someone who understood what she was feeling, someone who would be a priceless support.
Still...she was the one who was pregnant, and having him attend her appointments, where she would be prodded and scanned and intimate details of her body would be discussed? Even contemplating that happening with a stranger in the room—albeit a stranger she’d slept with once... A shudder ran down her spine. It was too much, too soon.
“Nick, I want you to know that I won’t keep the babies from you.”
He nodded, as if she’d confirmed something for him. “Good, we’re on the same page, because I plan to be involved.”
It was just what she’d been hoping to hear from the father of her unborn children, and yet, it made it so much harder to deliver the news she had to tell him. She bit down on her lip, trying to find the perfect words.
“At some point during my pregnancy, I’ll be moving home to Connecticut. I’m going to need my mother’s support with the twins, but you’ll be more than welcome to visit any time you want.” Her mother had been the first person Harper had called when the stick had turned pink. And thank God she had—her mother had put everything into perspective for her, taking her from being overwhelmed to getting her head around her impending motherhood and believing she could do it. A big part of that had been her mother’s offer to help her raise the twins. It was just what she’d needed to hear while she was panicking.
“Leaving?” he said, his tone a little sharper than it had been moments before. “You can’t leave.”
She laid a hand on his strong forearm, hating that she was doing this to him, but having no option. “I’m really sorry, Nick, but I honestly don’t think I can do this without my mom’s help.”
He reached over and closed his hand over hers, holding it to his arm, infusing her hand with the warmth of his skin, sending her pulse into an erratic rhythm. “I already have a daughter. Ellie. I can’t put into words how much I love her—she’s the most perfect thing in my life.”
Harper felt her mouth open, but she quickly caught the expression of surprise before it fully manifested. She wasn’t sure why she was surprised he had a daughter—she knew so little about him that there could be much larger secrets and she’d have no idea.
“Ellie’s a pretty name. She’s lucky to have you.”
“Well, that opinion’s in the minority. Her mother—my ex-wife—is trying to keep her from me. That is not happening again. I want to be a hands-on dad with our babies.”
Harper withdrew her hand from his grip and wrapped it around the nape of her neck. It was one thing for him to say he wanted to be hands-on, but they weren’t a couple, and at the end of the day it would likely still be her on her own with newborns. She couldn’t make this situation right for everyone. It was impossible.
Nick stood up in front of her, feet shoulder-width apart, hands on his hips. “Look, we’ve just met each other again, I’ve found out I’m going to be a father to twins and you’ve realized it was me and not Malcolm that night. This has been a big night for both of us.”
“That’s putting it mildly.”
“How about we take some time to let this all sink in before we discuss the future? I’ll come by tomorrow night and take you to dinner. We can talk more then.”
Harper hesitated. If she had to make a guess, she’d say Nick wanted to take her out to soften her up so he could change her mind about moving away. Agreeing to dinner felt like going out under false pretenses when she knew she couldn’t stay in Royal. But it was getting late, and he was right that it had been a big night. She’d been crashing into bed earlier now that she was growing two babies, and right now she was exhausted. All she wanted was to reheat some dinner and climb into her bed. So maybe putting the conversation on hold wasn’t a bad idea.
She stood as well. “Sure, that sounds good.”
“Great.” He headed for the front door and paused with his palm resting on the handle. The memory of the way he’d greeted her when he’d arrived flooded her mind, and she wondered if he was thinking the same thing. If he’d kiss her again as he left.
But he simply said, “Is seven o’clock okay?”
Seven? Then her brain clicked back into gear. To pick her up. “Seven is good.”
He gave her a guarded smile and opened the door. “See you then.”
As she reached the door to close it behind him, he disappeared down the path and was gone. Barely an hour had passed since Nick Tate had exploded back into her life, and now everything was different.
And she was still unsure whether that was a good or a bad thing.
Two
The next night, Nick left for Harper’s place with a bit of time to spare. He wanted to get her something, a token to show he was acting in good faith while they tried to work things through. Besides, she was in a tough place—pregnant with twins and thinking she had to leave Texas to get the support she needed. At least he could show her she was wrong about the last part.
He wanted a small gift, just to show he was here, ready to play his part. He’d heard some men bought their wives or partners jewelry when they became pregnant, but from the way Harper had reacted during their talk last night, he guessed a gift that expensive would overwhelm her. He just needed something to make her smile. Maybe he could start with flowers?
He ducked into the local grocery store and was confronted with rows and rows of buckets overflowing with blooms. And he hit the snag in his plan. In his experience, most women had a favorite flower, but he knew so little about Harper that he had no chance guessing. Sure, he knew more than he had twenty-four hours ago, but there were certain things that a man should know about the woman who was carrying his babies. Starting with her favorite flower...
“Daddeee!” The sweet, familiar voice rang out and his heart melted into a puddle. He turned in time to catch his three-year-old in the air as she launched herself at him.
“Hey, beautiful girl,” he said, squeezing her tight against his chest.
She leaned in to whisper in his ear. “Can you have dinner wiv us tonight?”
When she leaned back to see his face, her eyes were huge with entreaty, and it killed him to have to say no. Her mother, Melissa, and Melissa’s fiancé wouldn’t welcome him into their house, so even if he hadn’t had plans with Harper, he would have to decline.
He glanced around, and sure enough, Melissa and Guy stood about ten feet away, both holding various grocery items, and neither smiling.
“Aw, baby, that’s probably not a good idea. But I’ll see you this weekend. How about we go to the park this time?”
Immediately distracted, Ellie nodded. “The big one wiv the swings?”
He grinned. “That’s the one.”
“I love you, Daddy,” she whispered, gripping his neck tight.
“I love you, too, Ellie.”
“Flowers. Are you going on a date, Nick?” Melissa was closer now. “You know I don’t want girlfriends around Ellie. It’s too disruptive for her. And my lawyer agrees.”
Nick stifled the retort that sat on his tongue. He was perfectly capable of working out what was and wasn’t good for his daughter. But getting into an argument in front of Ellie was definitely something that wouldn’t be good for her.
“Nice to see you, Melissa.” He tipped his chin at the other man. “Guy.”
“I mean it, Nick,” Melissa said, undeterred.
“You know what?” her smarmy fiancé said. “How about you go ahead and do it, and we’ll have a much stronger custody case. Ellie tells us everything anyway.”
Despite the pressure building in his head, Nick refused to rise to the bait. He gave Ellie another squeeze and put her down. “I’d love to stay and chat some more, but I have to go.” He grabbed the closest bunch of flowers, said, “See you soon, baby,” to his daughter, gave the adults a tight smile and headed for the checkout.
A few minutes later, he slid into the driver’s seat of his car and paused before starting the engine. His lawyer had given him similar advice about women—if he was trying to prove that he was a stable influence in Ellie’s life, then a parade of girlfriends would work against him. That had been such a nonissue at the time, he’d barely paid attention. But now...
...now a woman he barely knew was carrying his twins.
He didn’t have to run it by his lawyer to know that this would make him look irresponsible. And, as Malcolm had said, there were no secrets in Royal with Maverick on the loose, so Melissa could find out any day. Added to the PTSD he’d struggled with since his last deployment, it might be enough for the judge to award full custody of Ellie to her mother instead of the shared custody he was asking for. He couldn’t go on with only a day every two weeks with his daughter. His lungs squeezed tight.
He had to do something.
Something to make him look more stable.
He ran through scenario after scenario, but, really, there was only one solution.
If he and Harper were married, not only would he avoid any appearance of irresponsibility, but, in the judge’s eyes, he’d have a stable family unit to offer Ellie. Turning a negative into a positive.
The more he thought about it, marriage would not only help him with the custody case, it would also keep Harper here in Royal so he could be involved in the babies’ lives. It was a win-win.
But could he do it? Marry a woman who was practically a stranger? Could he convince her to do it?
Movement at the front of the store caught his attention. Ellie danced around Melissa’s legs as they made their way out the door and toward their car. His heart thumped hard. He’d do anything for that little girl. And he already felt the same about being a part of the twins’ lives, too. For all three children, he’d do anything. Even marry someone he didn’t love.
Decision made, he started the engine. Now he just had to convince Harper.
Glad he’d allowed extra time, he drove by the Texas Cattleman’s Club, where he’d made the reservation for dinner tonight. A few extra touches would help when he proposed. At this stage all he had going for him was that he and Harper had enough chemistry to light the city, so he wanted to do anything extra he could to sway the odds in his favor. It wasn’t much, but he’d been on missions with less auspicious beginnings. He’d make it work.
On the way in, he heard his name and turned to see the tall, solid form of Gabe Walsh stepping out of his car. Gabe was a former special agent with the FBI who now ran the Walsh Group, his family’s private security firm. Before Gabe had taken over, the Walsh Group had bought their body armor from Tate Armor, and Nick was loath to lose their business. One of the proposals he was working on now was the first one for TWG with Gabe at the helm.
“Walsh,” Nick said, waiting until the other man reached him, and then shaking his hand.
“Not often we see you out and about, Tate. Is this a special occasion?”
For a long moment, Nick considered telling him about Harper and the babies, trying to make it sound like casual chat, but really letting him know early in case Maverick released the information. At least that way it wouldn’t look like a security breach; instead, it would just be old news.
But, in reality, there was no way to announce such large personal news to a work acquaintance in a parking lot and make it sound natural. And Gabe had been in law enforcement—dropping something like that with no context would make him suspicious.
So, instead, he worked the other angle. “Just checking on a reservation. Hey, have you been looking into Maverick?”
Gabe’s head cocked to the side. “You know something?”
“Actually, I was hoping you would.”
Gabe winced. “Nothing. But I sure would love to know who it is.”
“You and everyone in town.” They reached the front doors, and both men stopped. Nick thrust his hand out, and Gabe shook it. “Good to see you. I’ll have that proposal to you in the next few days.”
“Looking forward to it.” Gabe went through the doors, and Nick let out a breath.
If there was about to be a breakthrough on the case, Gabe Walsh would know about it—he had connections everywhere. Which meant the situation with Harper was ripe for Maverick to milk or try to blackmail him over. The only way forward was to neutralize the potential threat before Maverick acted on it.
And that brought Nick back to the one way to resolve the situation on all fronts.
He had to marry Harper Lake.
* * *
Harper glanced across at Nick as he sat on the other side of their relatively secluded table at the restaurant in the Texas Cattleman’s Club. The table had the same crisp white tablecloth, sparking crystal glassware and thick, luxurious napkins as the others, but theirs definitely had something extra. To start with, there was the cascading arrangement of tiny white roses, and gold cutlery instead of silver on the other tables. And Nick had arrived to pick her up with a bouquet of pink lilies, which she’d put in a vase before they’d left. It all gave her a sinking feeling that Nick was pulling out all the stops. And she was going to tell him she was leaving anyway...
She’d been thinking about tonight almost constantly since he’d walked out her door twenty-four hours ago, and knew Nick would try to use their dinner to convince her to stay, so she’d decided to share one of her deepest fears with him, to be completely up front about why she had to go. Maybe then he’d understand—even if he didn’t like it—and wouldn’t make it more difficult than it already was.
At the very least, she owed him an explanation of why she wouldn’t risk staying and failing. Afterward, they could work out visitation arrangements and do their best to ensure the babies had a relationship with their father.
But she had a feeling Nick wasn’t going to make it easy to leave him.
She glanced at him now, the strong column of his throat emerging from the collar of his charcoal dress shirt, his mouth that she knew from experience could take her to heaven, dark eyes that were smoldering as they watched her... She tore her gaze away and looked down at her place setting. Leaving this man would never be easy.
In the car, as if by unspoken consent, they’d tabled the discussion about their situation and instead talked about the town and people they both knew. But now they were at the restaurant, and Harper didn’t want to put it off any longer. She needed to let him know where she stood before he started his pitch.
“Nick,” she began then paused to find some air for her lungs. “This is not how I pictured having my first baby.”
“It’s not how I pictured having my second and third, but we can make it work.” He seemed so sure, so confident he could make things right, and that broke her heart.
A waiter brought the two glasses of sparkling water they’d ordered, and Harper took a sip, both to help her dry mouth and to wait until they were alone again to resume the conversation.
“I need to explain something.” She tucked her hair behind her ear and met his gaze. “I grew up in a broken home. My mother did a great job, but some experiences will leave a mark. I made a vow that I’d never subject a child to the same pain, confusion and self-blame that I felt growing up.”
He cocked his head to the side, surveying her. “You don’t come across as someone who’s riddled with doubts.”
“How do I come across?” she asked, despite herself. She didn’t want to be sidetracked, but she was suddenly very interested in his opinion of her.
“When Malcolm talked about our attorney, he always said you were a go-getter. Someone who doesn’t back down for anyone or anything. Of course, I didn’t connect you to the person he was talking about until last night, but I’d have to say my initial assessment of you is the same.”
That was the image she’d tried to project. More than that, it was the person she’d worked hard to become. But life was always more complicated than that.
She shrugged one shoulder. “Appearances can be deceiving. The tough persona is an invisible armor I developed against being abandoned and rejected.” She hesitated, unsure how far to expose herself. But it was fair that he knew, that he understood. Despite her body wanting to fold itself up into a ball, she straightened her spine and went on. “It started back when my father left. The night he went, he was angry, maybe it was defensive, I don’t know, but he took it out on me as well as my mother. My last memories of him are him yelling at me in our living room then walking out the door.”
And despite the yelling, she’d followed him and thrown herself on the lawn outside, sobbing as his car drove away. She closed her eyes for long moments, trying to contain the emotions the memory always stirred up. The only sound was the clink of dishes from other tables and a low hum of distant conversation. She was almost scared to open her eyes in case she’d said too much. Given too much information too soon.
But she did open them and found Nick’s understanding gaze resting on her.
He drew in a deep breath. “God, Harper.”
She shook her head. “Believe me, I’m not telling you this for sympathy. In fact I haven’t told a soul that story before.”
“Then why are you telling me?” he asked.
“The thing is, that night triggered something for me. I don’t handle abandonment well, and I’ve never been able to move past it.” In fact, she’d been repeating the pattern through poor choices in men, dating guys who turned out to be commitment-shy to say the least. And so the cycle had continued. Being aware of what she was doing hadn’t helped her stop it. “Knowing how debilitating fears like that can be and how instability when you’re young can have lifelong effects, I’ve always wanted my children to only know the love and security of an intact family unit. That’s not an option now, but I still need to do the best I can to make the household they grow up in secure.”
“You don’t have to leave to get that. We can do that right here.”
“I’ll never keep them from you, Nick. I know how tough it can be to be separated from family members. But these babies are going to need a stable unit around them. You and I can try to work something out, but let’s be realistic. We’ve just met.”
“Sure, we just met,” he said, gaze not faltering. “But we’re not your garden variety of strangers. We’re expecting babies together, Harper. Unusual circumstances call for unusual measures.”
His reasoning was compelling, but still...
She lifted the spoon in her place setting and turned it in her fingers as she composed her thoughts, then lined it up neatly with the other cutlery again. “I wasn’t ready for one baby, let alone two, and I know I’ll have trouble coping with two babies with absolutely no experience. My mother will be there for us. Full-time. I’m really sorry, but the right thing for these babies is for me to move back to Connecticut.”
The waiter came by and, after telling them the specials, took their order. Once he left, Nick picked up the conversational thread again.
“I appreciate you telling me that. It couldn’t have been easy.” He squared his shoulders. “And I’ll be as honest with you in return. You need to know that I have post-traumatic stress disorder from my time in the Middle East, and I’ve pretty much been living as a hermit since I got back. But I’m changing things.” Frown lines appeared across his forehead. “I need to change things. My ex-wife is getting remarried, and she wants me to sign over my parental rights to our three-year-old daughter.”
“That’s crazy,” Harper said, her lawyer’s sense of justice kicking in. “Why would she want to keep a father and child from seeing each other?”
He speared his fingers through his hair. “She’s claiming my PTSD is making me an unfit father.”
“Is it?” she asked and tried not to hold her breath as she waited for the answer.
“No.” His voice was clear and sure. “I might be screwing up a heap of things in my life, but Ellie isn’t one of them. I’d do anything for her. Plus, she needs her father. She needs me. But—” he winced “—having two babies on the way with someone I’m not in a relationship with will probably damage my case.”
“Oh, Nick.” She hadn’t thought the situation could be any more complex. She’d been wrong.
“There’s something else we need to consider. With Maverick active and causing people real grief, this is a secret that may be released at an inopportune time.”
Maverick. She hadn’t even considered herself a possible target before—there had been nothing juicy enough in her life to interest him—but now she was just the sort of target he seemed to like. “If he announces that I’m pregnant by the boss, it would reflect badly on Tate Armor. It has the whiff of a workplace tinged by sexual harassment.”
“Worse than that. The breach of privacy itself would make the company look like we don’t know what we’re doing in the security field.”
“Of course,” she said, running through the ramifications. “So we need to tell people ourselves soon so we’re controlling the information.”
“Ideally, yes. And if we ensure that everything looks unquestionably aboveboard, all the better.”
“How can we do that?”
“The way I see it, we have a few problems that have arisen from this pregnancy. You’re feeling overwhelmed and in need of backup. You also want an intact family unit for the babies. And I have to consider that I’ll look irresponsible when my custody case is heard. And finally, Tate Armor’s reputation is at risk.”
She winced. “That does sound like a lot when you list everything out.”
“I’ve thought about this, and I see one solution that addresses all of these problems.”
“That must be a pretty powerful solution.”
“It is.” He rolled his shoulders back. “We should get married.”