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Before he could fully push down the unwanted feelings, she was chattering again. “You’re just in time for dinner. I made tofu burgers, with sweet potato wedges to help balance your chi. Do you like honeydew?”
“Lily.”
“And I want you to try this wine. It’s made from mangos, but you’re going to love it. Mist says it balances his energies.”
“Lily.”
Squawk. “You can’t handle the truth,” the bird called out, clear as a human.
“Rhett, get off.” She shoved the orange tabby—Ethan’s archenemy—off the closest kitchen bar stool. “Here, Ethan. Sit down and I’ll make you a pla—”
“Lily!” He couldn’t remember the last time he’d raised his voice.
“Yes, Ethan?”
“Turn off your music.”
She reached up, pulled out her earbuds and waited for him expectantly.
“Where did all this stuff come from?” He gestured back into his living room.
“I know. It looks so much better, right?” She grinned.
“You can’t just come in here and redecorate.”
“Oh, it cost me hardly anything.” Her eyes twinkled. “I got all this from the Goodwill store. They have some wonderful stuff. Come on, let’s eat.” She was on her way back to the kitchen, when Ethan took a step to grab her arm, but he didn’t see the rodent in his path and tripped over it. The animal squealed as if it was being tortured. “I thought I told you to get a cage for that thing.”
Lily scooped up the long-haired rat. “Oh, poor baby. Are you all right?” Her brows crinkled as they had yesterday. “You’re mad about the pillows and stuff. I should have asked first. But I wanted to surprise you.” Those big blue eyes gazed up at him. “I’m so sorry I upset you.”
He’d expected an argument. Recrimination or tears. But staring into her apologetic eyes, he was appalled at his show of temper. The fury drained from his body like water through a sieve as guilt hit him full force. The poor woman had just lost everything she owned. This was the second time he’d lost command of himself. Around her. “I’m not upset.” He unclenched his fists.
“I just couldn’t stay here the way it was. The negative energy was bringing me down.”
Huh? What was he supposed to say to that? She had a way of confusing him and turning him on at the same time. Not good. He needed to get this conversation back to sounding rational.
Gritting his teeth, he glanced into his living room. It was only a plant and a few pillows. And a kitty litter box he noticed by the back door. And the noisy bird. But it was just for tonight and tomorrow. He could stand it for one day. Then he’d pack it all off with her when she left on Monday. “Fine, it can stay. But the roden—the guinea pig needs to be contained for his own safety.”
“Her.”
“What?”
“Scarlett. She’s a girl.”
“Well, she needs a cage.”
“But she needs her freedom. No animal should be confined against their—”
“Lily.”
“Yes, Ethan?”
He folded his arms across his chest. “It’s not negotiable.”
She sighed and cuddled the guinea pig under her chin. Then she looked up at him with that beautiful smile. “Well, I suppose every relationship requires compromise. But I want to get one that has a house, and a wheel, and—”
“That’s fine. Let’s go.” He fished his keys from his pocket and headed out the door while Lily set the tray of tofu burgers in the fridge.
Wait a minute. He stopped on the first step. Had she just used the word relationship?
3
ETHAN GRABBED A bright red Pet World cart as Lily bounced down the aisle. Sometimes he wondered if she’d been dropped on her head as a child. On the other hand, he also couldn’t stop picturing her naked. What kind of sicko did that make him?
“Good evening, sir, can I help you find something?” A teenager with a severe case of acne, dressed in khaki pants and a red polo shirt, stood near the cash registers.
“Guinea pig cages?” Ethan kept an eye on Lily as she rounded a corner into a side aisle.
“Yes, sir, the small pets section is in the back, to the left,” the teen answered, as another customer walked up to ask him something.
Of course it would be all the way at the back. Shopping of any kind was a necessary evil. But a pet store? With grim determination Ethan headed deeper into hostile territory, stopping at the corner where he’d last seen Lily.
“Aren’t these cute?” She held up several brown stuffed animals. “Rhett would love these. Which one? A catnip hedgehog or a catnip squirrel?”
Yeah. Just what he wanted. To buy the scary feline a toy. “Small pets stuff is farther down the aisle.” Ethan moved on, expecting her to follow. And she did, until they passed the intersection.
She squealed. “Oooh, Ethan. These are so adorable.”
Maybe if he just kept going she’d put down whatever she’d seen, and get on board with their plan of action.
“It’s a Cuddle Pal for Humphrey to lie on. Ethan, you’re not looking.”
Why couldn’t she act like a normal adult? He had better things to do than stand around looking at pet toys with a weird, infuriating female. He rounded on her. “Lily, our goal is to acquire a guinea pig cage. We get in, complete our mission and get out.”
She stared at him as if he was the crazy one, then shook her head and laughed.
“What?” He tightened his grip on the handle of the cart.
“This isn’t a combat zone. We don’t have to save the tropical fish section from reptile terrorist attacks.”
He narrowed his eyes. “It’s simply a matter of expediency. If you pick up and comment on everything we pass, we’ll be here until they close.”
“And what would be so bad about that? What else have you got to do tonight?”
“I—” He’d think of something in a second. Surely there was something he needed to do at home. “That’s not the point. The point is there is no reason to examine every single item when you don’t intend to buy them.”
“The point—” she emphasized the word “—is to have fun.”
“Fun?”
“You know. That thing you did as a kid? Playing? Cops and robbers? Cowboys and Indians?” She lowered her voice and wiggled her brows. “Doctor and nurse? Didn’t you and your friends play?”
“No.” Playing is for sissies. His dad’s words echoed in his head.
Her smile disappeared. “Oh.”
Avoiding the pity in her eyes, he pushed the cart toward the back of the store.
She caught up to him and tucked her arm in his. “Where did you grow up?”
“You’re the psychic, you tell me.”
“Actually, that’s my friend, Sunny. She’s amazing. But I like guessing games. How about after three wrong guesses you tell me the right answer?”
Ethan sighed. Nothing was going to stop this woman. “Fine.”
“Okay. Ooh, this is fun. Hmm …” She put her finger to her lips and tapped. “Let’s see, um, Detroit, Michigan.”
“Nope.”
“Is it south, east or west of Michigan?”
“That wasn’t part of the deal.” He bit back a smile.
“Humph.” She pouted. And it looked sexy, damn it.
She wasn’t going to ge—
“South Dakota.”
He came to a halt and turned to face her. “How did you do that?”
She wiggled her eyebrows. “You twitched when I said the word south. And you don’t have a Southern drawl, so I knew it wasn’t South Carolina.”
He … twitched? “Huh,” he grunted, the only way he could convey a grudging respect for her. No one had ever read him like that.
“Omigosh, that was fun. Okay, what city? Gosh, I don’t know very many cities in South Dakota. I know about Mount Rushmore, and the Black Hills, and Crazy Horse.”
“You’ve never heard of it.” He barely remembered it. He remembered shoveling snow, taking out the trash, homework. But not playing with friends. His only memories before that were of sitting around in the hospital waiting room.
Lily shrugged one shoulder. “I still want to know. Is it Sioux Falls?”
He sighed. If he didn’t answer, he figured she’d bug him until he did. “Belle Fourche. It’s in the northwest part of the state,” he continued, as she opened her mouth. “Just north of the Black Hills National Forest.”
“Belle means beautiful in French. I bet it’s beautiful country up there.”
“I guess.” He’d been too desperate to get away to care. He’d joined the air force right out of high school, and could count on one hand the number of times he’d been home since.
“Are your parents still there?”
They weren’t the snowbird type. It would take an act of God to pry them out of their house. His mom with her blank stare spent her life in the kitchen, cooking and cleaning, and his father sat coldly at the table with his paper.
“I’m sorry.” Lily squeezed his arm. “Have they … passed on?”
He resumed his mission in the small pets section. “They’re fine.” As far as he knew. Last time he’d received a letter from his mother was seven months ago. Right after Christmas. After he’d sent his usual card with a check.
“Any brothers or sisters?”
Ethan gritted his teeth as a familiar pang hit his chest. “What is it with you? What do you care?”
Lily stopped in her tracks and pulled her hand away. “Oh, Ethan. Your aura just now. I’m sorry I brought up something so painful.”
Denying the pain was on the tip of his tongue. But for some reason he couldn’t. Without a word, he continued down the main aisle.
Lily caught up to him and again slipped her arm through his. “So, what do you do in the air force?”
He raised a brow.
“Oh, right. Three guesses. Okay, fighter pilot.”
He shrugged. “Was. I’m an air combat instructor now.”
“Air combat? As in teaching maneuvers? Like the Red Baron?”
“Lily.” Thankfully, they’d reached the back of the store. He turned left. “We don’t have to do the whole get-to-know-each-other thing.”
“Eeethan.” She said his name as if he’d just burped the alphabet at the queen’s tea. “Of course we do. But I’ll tell you about me for a little while.”
He almost stopped her. But she was going to chatter about something, so he might as well … Okay, so he was curious.
“I grew up all over the West Coast. San Fran, L.A., San Diego. And everywhere in between. It was usually just my mom and me. But sometimes we lived with my mom’s boyfriends.”
Lily gasped and disappeared down an aisle to the right. “Omigawd, Ethan. They have Halloween costumes for pets.”
Wait a minute. What about her mom’s boyfriends? Why had she said the word boyfriend as if it was cow dung? Had any of them hurt her? Ethan pulled to a stop when he spied her on a side aisle holding up a devil costume and a bear in a red T-shirt.
“Wouldn’t Humphrey look adorable as Winnie the Pooh?”
She was insane. That was the only explanation. “You didn’t finish.”
“Finish?” She put the costumes back and returned to his side.
“About your mother’s boyfriends.”
“Not much to tell.” Lily changed directions again to stroll down the main aisle, and he followed. “I never knew my dad. My mom was really young when she found out she was pregnant with me, and she said he freaked.”
Ethan wondered which was worse—his father or no father?
“I think his family sent her some money, and she went to college. It was just me and her for a while until … she fell in love with this guy and seemed to just go crazy. She quit a good job, moved to be with him, and then it didn’t work out. She was crushed.” Lily stopped and looked at Ethan. “But you know what’s crazy? A few years later, she did it again.”
“So, that’s why you moved around a lot?”
Lily shrugged. “I didn’t mind. Every new city was an adventure. A chance to see what fate had in store for me in each new place.”
Karma. Fate. Who lived their life like that? “So, did karma tell you to buy an herb shop in Vegas?”
Her smile faltered and she hitched her purse higher on her shoulder. “I came out here with my best friend right after high school. He wanted to be a croupier and I …” She gave a one-shouldered shrug. “I went to massage school.”
Ethan scowled, certain there was more she wasn’t telling him. But they’d finally located the small pet cages. Then there was bedding. And that house he’d agreed to. And Lily loaded one of those hollow plastic balls an animal could roll around in into the cart, as well.
“Can we go now?” he asked.
“You really hate shopping, don’t you?”
“Doesn’t everyone?”
She shook her head. “Theo didn’t. He loved shopping with me.”
“Theo was your friend?”
She bit her lip and Ethan wanted to soothe it with his thumb. “And my husband.”
Husband? She was married?
“He was killed in Iraq five years ago.”
Killed. Guilt oozed past the wall of Ethan’s perfectly legitimate detachment. She’d been so young to be widowed. “I’m sorry.” He looked into her eyes and then couldn’t look away. All he could think about was that horrible cliché about drowning in pools of … something. But that’s what it felt like. They were exactly the turquoise color of the Caribbean.
Thankfully, she broke eye contact and said, “It’s okay.”
Without thinking, he tucked his knuckle under her chin and lifted her face. “I’ve lost friends in battle, too. It’s never okay.”
Her eyes filled with tears, and before he could stop her, she stepped close and wrapped her arms around his waist. “No one’s ever said that before. But it’s true, isn’t it?”
Just as he was regretting the rare moment of spontaneity, she sniffed and stepped back. “Thank you.” She pulled her shirt up and wiped the tears off her cheeks, and then gave him a brilliant smile. “Well, so much for helping you have fun tonight.”
Stunned, he stared at her, his arms still held away from his body. He’d liked having her cheek against his chest. He’d liked the feel of her body pressed to his.
She took a deep breath. “Okay. Let’s go home now.”
Relieved, he pointed their cart full of goodies toward the front before she changed her mind.
AFTER REHEATING AND offering him the tofu burgers, which he declined, Lily began setting up the cage for the guinea pig.
Ethan retreated to his weight room and worked out an extra fifteen minutes, then went a couple rounds with his punching bag for good measure. After a quick shower, he slipped on jeans and a T-shirt and braved the main room.
She was messing with the rodent when he entered the kitchen. “Good night.”
“You’re going to bed?” She abandoned the cage and stood.
Ethan tried to look away, but his gaze wouldn’t obey his survival instincts. She’d changed into a pair of oversize men’s boxers and a tight tank top. And she must have showered earlier while he was working out, because her hair was damp. It was swept up off her neck, all her strawberry curls held with a clip. She smelled like some kind of sweet flower.
He glanced at his watch. “It’s ten o’clock.”
“And you always go to bed at ten?”
Always. He shrugged. “Usually.”
“But you haven’t eaten anything.”
“I’m not hungry.”
“Would you like that glass of wine? It’s—”
“I don’t drink.”
She blinked. “Ever?”
“No.”
“Are you … a recovering alcoholic?”
He frowned. “No.”
“You have some religious strictures against alcoholic beverages?”
Where was this going? “No.”
“Oh.” She cocked her head, studying him.
There was an awkward silence, and all Ethan could think about was how she’d looked this morning.
“Well …” He gave her a curt nod. “Good n—”
“Wait.” She rushed to the refrigerator, opened it and bent over to pull out one of his dinner plates. “I almost forgot. I made this for you.” On the plate was a crusty golden cake with whipped cream and strawberries on top.
Ethan’s stomach growled and his mouth watered. “Is that—”
“Strawberry shortcake.” She confirmed his suspicion with a grin. His all-time-favorite dessert. How had she known?
Setting it on the counter, she turned to grab a smaller plate from the cabinet and his largest chopping knife from the block. “Please say you’ll eat just a bite.”
Ethan told himself he didn’t want to hurt her feelings. And he was weak from hunger. He reached over the counter, swiped a fork from a drawer and dropped onto one of the bar stools.
Before he knew it he’d finished off two huge slices and was licking the fork. Suddenly, he realized Lily was sitting beside him, sucking on a strawberry, watching him with half-closed eyes.
Swirling her tongue around the red fruit, she wrapped her lips around the fat end. Then she closed her eyes and moaned as she bit into it and chewed.
That was the oldest trick in the book. But there was a reason women still used it. Because it worked.
He stared at her, fighting the pull, fighting the need.
Her tongue swept a trickle of juice from her lips, and Ethan groaned. A man could take only so much temptation. He grasped her shoulders and pulled her against him, watching her mouth part in surprise right before he took possession of it.
She opened up to him as if she’d been waiting all her life for him to kiss her, wrapping her arms around his neck and rubbing her stiff nipples against his chest.
That trampled the last vestiges of his control. He slid an arm around her back and crushed her to him, devouring her mouth, bruising her lips. She whimpered, which only served to ratchet up his lust. His cock surged and pulsed. It’d been too long since he’d been with a woman, and his body was making up for lost time. His free hand cupped her breast and squeezed, his thumb rubbing across the puckered peak. She was a perfect fit, filling his palm. So soft, yet firm. He wanted a taste.
He stood, lifting her with him, and carried her to the couch. Shoving pillows out of the way, he laid her down, dropping on top of her. His lips moved over hers and his tongue swept in to taste her whipped cream and strawberries. But he wanted more. He had to taste her breasts, and lick the pink nipples that he’d seen in his mind all day long.
“Wait, Ethan,” she murmured as he kissed his way down her neck, lifting her tank top to expose the soft globes. She tried to pull away, but he held fast, denying her release. His body was in command, his cock straining for completion of the act. Needing to touch her flesh, he brought his mouth to one tight peak and suckled.
“Hold on.” She wriggled beneath him. “Hold on!” She brought her palms to either side of his face and tried to push him off, but he only growled and moved to nip at her other breast while his hands slipped beneath her boxers, cupped her butt and pressed her against his hard, aching erection.
“Ethan,” she gasped, fear in her voice.
The haze of lust cleared. He froze, shocked, and lifted himself off her. He was shaking. What was he doing, forcing himself on a woman? Had he lost his mind?
No. He’d lost the ability to reason. And that was why he never allowed himself to be this much out of control.
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