Grey

6. Sighted or Blind

‘Mr Grey, please remove your hood.’

I glanced up from my math problems. ‘Sir?’

Mr Weir stood over me, obviously irritated. ‘Your hood, Mr Grey,’ he said, pointing to a laminated list of rules on the wall. ‘No hats or coverings in the classroom.’

I looked around self-consciously. Everyone was in a typical Monday morning stupor, working drearily at their desks. Only Avery stole a glance at me over the edge of his textbook. I sighed and reached up, pushing back my jacket hood. Avery made a weird choking sound.

Alex Graham turned around in his seat directly in front of me. He looked me over in his typical ‘everyone on the planet is beneath me’ way and sneered through his nasty mountain-man beard. ‘Nice.’

My chest grew warm underneath my jacket at his insult. I didn’t need any more negative attention from Alex. He singled me out for ridicule enough on a daily basis as it was. I hunched in my seat and narrowed my eyes back at him, feeling the heat churning into irritated anger. I clenched my teeth, determined to keep my stupid, newfound emotions under control. No freak outs, Sebastian.

Mr Weir cleared his throat disparagingly, and continued moving down the row, checking students’ work. Alex snickered and turned back to his graffiti effort on the desk with his pen. As soon as the coast was clear, Avery leaned across the aisle and poked me with his pencil. He aimed his eraser at my hair, silently indicating the obvious question.

‘Just trying something new,’ I whispered.

No one needed to know that I’d tried to dye my hair back to its original shade all weekend, but with no success. I’d rinse out the solution, only to find the same slate gray color mocking me in the mirror. I didn’t know what Hugo and the guys had used on me or how long it would last. But for now, it appeared my new hair was permanent.

In the parking lot after school, we made our plans for the evening. Or rather, everyone else made the plans while I stood in the back of the group, adjusting the hood of my jacket and tugging it as low as possible. I’d been slammed with comments about my hair all day. Katie had given me several disapproving looks, and Emma had even threatened to stop by later and ‘repair the damage’.

‘Hey, I saw Erica on my way out,’ Mitchell said as he leaned against his car. ‘She said Ms Lucian’s going to post the cast list for A Midsummer Night’s Dream at six tonight.’

‘Finally,’ said Katie. ‘I’ve been freaking out all weekend.’

‘I’m sure you’ll get a part,’ said Emma, from under Brandon’s arm. He had her pinned against his car door and was proceeding to suck on her ear. ‘I can’t wait to see who got cast.’

‘Okay,’ said Mitchell, ignoring them. ‘I vote we meet here, check out the list, and then head to Josephine’s party at the Fairgrounds. Is that cool with everybody?’

Josephine’s party.

I’d forgotten all about it.

‘Works for me.’ Katie retrieved her keys from her purse. ‘Somebody text me as soon as you see the cast and let me know. I made the mistake of volunteering to help with the party, and now Josie’s made me her slave for the next few hours.’

Avery winked. ‘Remember, you promised you’d get Josephine to introduce me to some of those hot Circe performers.’

Katie wrinkled her nose. ‘Don’t get your hopes up.’

She got in her car and drove off. The rest of our group exchanged goodbyes and quickly dispersed. Avery pointed at me over the hood of his Jeep.

‘You’re still coming, right?’ he asked, opening the door.

I hesitated. I wasn’t the party type, but I’d told Josephine I’d be there. And I couldn’t pass up the chance to prove that I wasn’t a complete bumbling freak. The gray hair wouldn’t earn me any points, but at least maybe I could talk to her this time and not come off as a total idiot. ‘Yeah, I’m coming.’

I pulled out of the parking lot right behind Avery, and I was halfway home before an unsettling thought struck me. I didn’t have a birthday present for Josephine.

‘I can’t show up without something,’ I groaned aloud.

My rumbling van seemed to agree, so I turned around and headed back into town. Sixes was filled with dozens of shops, and I decided to try my luck in the historic district. Maybe I could find something unique there. Josephine just didn’t seem like the card and candy type. I chose a promising street and eased the van into a parking slot near a line of antique stores.

The first shop was called Antiquities and Such. I opened the bright pink door and ventured inside. Strands of Christmas lights framed the shelves and piano music drifted from a pair of frayed speakers. The smell of old things tickled my nose. An elderly lady looked up from her magazine and smiled somewhat warily at me.

‘Can I help you, young man?’

I smiled back. ‘I’m just looking, thank you.’

She nodded and returned to her magazine, and I ducked into the first aisle. Row after row of delicate collectibles taunted me. The sight was discouraging. What would Josephine like? I’d barely talked to her; if one could count a few awkward sentences as actual conversation. I should have asked Katie’s advice, but it was too late now.

I checked my phone. It was already 5:30 p.m.. I was running out of time, and I wasn’t going to find anything here. I spun around, fumbling for my keys, and dropped my phone in the process. It clanked against the glass shelving. As I knelt to pick it up, I noticed the bottom shelf was empty, save for one object: a porcelain figure.

She was dressed in a patterned skirt and peasant top, painted bright orange and yellow. The artist had captured her in the middle of a dance, with her arms extended, her back arched, and her hair billowing. Lifelike green eyes stared back at me, holding my gaze so intently that I could have sworn she was real. I leaned in closer; captivated.

A Gypsy figurine that resembled Josephine Romany. Romany. I could almost hear the wheels clicking together in my head. Could it be that the traveling circus was made up of Gypsies, too? Is that why Hugo had abruptly cut me off when I mentioned their arrival? Was there still more my brother wasn’t telling me?

‘Young man, can I get that for you?’

I toppled backwards off my heels, narrowly missing the breakables on the shelf behind me. I blinked up at the wrinkled face. ‘It’s her,’ I murmured.

The woman looked at me as if I’d escaped from a mental institution. ‘Well, I’m glad you like it. I’ll package it up for you.’

She took the figurine and hobbled to the counter. She rolled the porcelain girl in crinkled paper and bundled it into a bag.

‘That will be fifteen dollars.’

I scrounged up enough bills to pay for the gift. Back inside my van, I placed the bag on the passenger seat and stared at it, feeling a little hazy. Was I cursed with seeing Josephine in every dancing image for the rest of my life? I forced my gaze away from the gift and glanced in the rearview mirror instead.

I shoved back my hood and raked my fingers through my hair as if I could somehow brush out the pewter sheen. But nothing changed. I had to hand it to the guys. They were taking this initiation pretty seriously. I gave my head a fierce shake, yanked on my hood, and drove back to Sixes High School.

I’d given little thought to the cast list until I arrived. I just wanted to look at the sheet, congratulate those who had gotten roles, and commence with the most difficult part of my day: Josephine’s party.

‘Okay, Sebastian,’ I said, ‘let’s get this over with.’

A crowd had gathered to see the audition results, and I eased closer to the posted sheet, trying not to draw attention. The first thing I noticed was all the leads. Josephine was Titania, Queen of the Fairies. She would be perfect. Brandon had snagged Lysander, and Emma was Hermia. I doubted their love scenes would take much effort. Avery won the part of Oberon, and I was proud that Katie had been assigned the role of Hippolyta. Of course, I would have to give her some good ribbing over that name.

And then I saw the unexpected: my own name. I looked away and back. Sure enough, there it was, right next to the character of Nick Bottom, the weaver. I cringed, knowing exactly what was in store for me.

As if on cue, Mitchell’s mischievous face came into view. ‘Hey Sebastian, isn’t Nick Bottom the guy who gets turned into an ass?’

Avery shoved Mitchell while the rest of the group laughed.

The ass. I sighed deeply. Perfect.

7. Fire and Ice

My van protested as I hit every pothole on Fairground Drive. But none of my passengers seemed to care. They were too busy discussing the cast list. I’d volunteered to drive – not because my van held the most people – but because it provided some distraction. And not from the incessant joking about my role in the play, either; I was used to Mitchell and his junior high level pranks. They didn’t faze me.

But attending Josephine’s party was a different story.

‘Look, guys,’ Emma squealed, nearly jabbing me in the eye as she pointed over my shoulder from the back seat. ‘We’re here!’

‘Way to state the obvious,’ said Brandon, pulling her back into his lap with a laugh.

She poked out her bottom lip. ‘Not funny.’

He leaned in for a kiss, and I shifted the rearview mirror so that I didn’t have to witness any more of the public displays of affection that pretty much summed up their relationship. But Avery craned his neck around from the passenger seat and made gagging noises.

The Fairgrounds was a twenty-acre expanse designed for recreational activities, just outside town. As I pulled through the gates, evidence of the Circe de Romany was everywhere. An enormous tent loomed overhead, covered with lush red and gold stripes. Bright pavilions and booths, in similar colors and trimmed with green, lined the perimeter of the grounds. Katie met us in the parking lot, flushed and beaming like a blast of sunshine.

‘Pretty cool, huh?’ Katie was at my elbow as we piled out of the van.

‘It’s all right,’ I said, ‘I mean, if you’re into this sort of thing.’

She grabbed the edge of my jacket and yanked me down to her level. ‘Listen to me, you social invert, you’re going to have fun tonight.’ Her blue eyes narrowed playfully. ‘Understood?’

My lip twitched into a grin. ‘Does fun include hovering dangerously close to the exit door, looking for the most opportune moment for escape?’

‘You’re impossible.’

She tried to hit me, but I dodged out of the way with a laugh.

Avery jogged up. ‘This is awesome!’

‘I know,’ Katie replied. ‘And Josie said the Circe’s added some new acts and expanded the carnival since their last visit.’

Avery looked as if he was in heaven. ‘More games and rides?’

Katie bounced on her toes. ‘Yep. And I hear the new shows are going to be really cool.’

I locked up the van, noting the numerous cars in the lot. Josephine had apparently wasted no time making friends. Just as I stuffed my keys into my pocket, a stocky young man strolled through the fence. A broad smile flashed across his tanned features.

‘That’s Francis, Josephine’s twin brother,’ Katie said, following my gaze.

‘I didn’t know she was a twin.’ Granted, I didn’t really know much about Josephine at all, but I could see the sibling resemblance. ‘So, is this his party, too?’

‘Well, technically. But he’s not big into parties.’ She crossed her arms. ‘Sounds like someone else I know.’

‘I have no idea what you’re talking about,’ I replied in my most innocent voice.

‘Hey, guys,’ said Francis as he approached. He was friendly, and I got the feeling that, despite Katie’s words, he’d be perfectly at ease with any party thrown his way. ‘Thanks for coming. Glad it’s not gonna be just us carnies tonight.’

‘We won’t let you down,’ said Brandon.

Francis led us through the opening, speaking over his shoulder as we walked. ‘Josephine wanted to have the party in the Big Tent.’ He gestured to the massive structure. ‘But we’re behind on setup, and it’s a mess inside. So we’re in the Holding Tent around back.’

‘What’s that?’ Emma asked, flitting out of Brandon’s grasp as he tried to lick her neck.

‘It’s the smaller tent where we dress and warm up for shows,’ Francis replied. He rolled his eyes as he saw Emma and Brandon exchange a slobbery kiss. I smiled to myself, liking him already.

Avery jabbed my ribs every time he saw something interesting. I was in danger of being permanently bruised by my Neanderthal friend before we reached the party. Just as I started to give him a good shove into the nearby fence, a sharp pain in my wrist brought me up short. I pulled up my sleeve and rubbed at the tattoo. Why was it hurting again? Avery caught sight of the inked design, and his mouth dropped open.

‘Man, you’ve been holding back on me!’ He twisted my arm to see. ‘When did’ya get the new body art?’

‘A couple of days ago. My brother finally gave in.’ I yanked my arm back when I saw the look on his face. ‘Yeah, I know, it’s a flower. But it wasn’t my choice. Hugo did it.’

‘Wouldn’t have been my choice either,’ Avery said, sounding almost sympathetic. ‘But actually, it’s not that bad. I mean, that’s some serious detail work!’

‘It’s no big deal.’ I shoved my sleeve back down.

‘So it’s like a theme then, huh?’ Avery’s eyes darted to my hood. ‘The new hair, the tattoo. Gotta look the part, right?’

‘The part?’

‘Yeah, the whole tattoo artist apprentice thing. Didn’t you say your brother’s gonna start training you?’

I half laughed. ‘Oh yeah. I’m not letting him out of it this time.’

No matter what he throws at me, I thought.

My wrist flared with pain again, and I pressed my fingers against it. Avery shot me a curious look, but didn’t say anything else. We hurried to catch up with the others. Francis took us around the Big Tent to another just behind it, half the size of the first.

‘Here we are,’ he announced, peeling back the canvas flap. ‘Come on in.’

It was nearly dark outside, but the Holding Tent was illuminated with lights. They were everywhere: hanging from the tent supports, running along the walls, and lining the tables. Inside, it looked like a quarter of the senior class had turned up for the party.

I scanned the crowd warily, suddenly feeling a bizarre need to memorize every person in the room. I zoned in on a couple of football players scratching their names into the canvas wall of the tent with a knife, their bodies hunched to hide their actions. I narrowed my eyes, feeling a strange burst of anger underneath my sternum.

I breathed in through my nose and let it out through my mouth. The anger was still there. I closed my eyes, jostled by the fierce heat of emotion. Where was it coming from? The sensation was beginning to scare me, and I bit down on my lip, commanding my body to relax. Gradually, my muscles eased, and the emotion dissipated.

‘Sebastian,’ said Avery, punching my arm. ‘You coming or not?’

I shook myself off and nodded, stepping through the opening.

‘Ah-ouch,’ I gasped suddenly.

Avery stared at me. ‘What?’

The tattoo was burning, worse than before, like slices of hot metal in my skin. I clenched my fist and shook out my arm. ‘Artwork’s still a little tender, I guess.’

Avery studied me for a moment, then hoisted his present under his arm. ‘Well, time to schmooze with the birthday girl.’ He pointed and winked.

Josephine Romany sat in the middle of a group of people on a red, circular couch. Avery rushed forward, diving comically into the cushions and causing general bedlam. I forgot about my wrist as I looked at Josephine. She’d changed for the party, wearing an emerald dress that matched her eyes. Her hair was clipped back with a silver butterfly, and jewelry sparkled at her neck, ears, and wrists.

Avery flirted with the female attendees, his long legs sprawled out in some girl’s lap. I felt a twinge of envy: Avery never had awkward moments. ‘Get over here,’ he called to me. ‘You’re missing all the fun.’

I waved, but there was no way I was joining them. Talk about awkward. I retreated to a large table cluttered with expensively packaged gifts. I unzipped my jacket and retrieved the brown bag, trying to camouflage it in the pile, but it stood out against the colorful array. I reached out to swipe it back.

‘This is so freaking awesome,’ said Brandon, leaning over my shoulder to check out the gifts.

I backed away, leaving mine. ‘There’s a lot of people here.’

Brandon smirked. ‘Well, it is a party.’

‘So people keep telling me.’

I scanned the crowd again, watching the movements and body language of everyone around me like I was working security. It felt weird, but I couldn’t seem to refocus my attention.

Emma stopped playing with Brandon’s hair and frowned at me. ‘Whoa, you don’t look so good, Sebastian.’

Sweat trickled down my neck. ‘It’s just hot in here,’ I replied, pushing my fingers against my stinging wrist. My skin was on fire.

A man and a woman wafted through the entrance, flanked by a large group of people: the Circe de Romany troupe. Their eccentric clothing, hair, and make-up suddenly made the rest of the party seem dull. I leaned against the table and tried to focus on the new arrivals rather than the uncomfortably rising temperature.

‘Welcome, everyone,’ said the man. ‘I’m Nicolas Romany, and this is my wife Sabina. We want to thank you for coming to Josephine and Francis’s birthday party. Sixes has become one of our favorite touring locations, and we’re glad to be back.’

Spontaneous applause erupted through the tent. Sabina Romany stepped forward. She looked like an older version of her daughter. ‘We’d like to invite you to enjoy some early carnival fun. We’ve set up a few rides and booths, just for tonight. Francis, why don’t you show our guests the way?’

In a rush, kids were flooding out of the tent flap, with Francis in the lead and Avery on his heels.

‘Let’s go check out the games,’ said Brandon, slapping me on the back.

‘I’ll be there in a minute.’

He shrugged and looped his arm over Emma’s shoulders, following the crowd outside. My eyes fixed on Josephine. She was sitting alone on the couch. At the sight of her, the jellified feeling returned. I was burning up, but I didn’t know if it was from the heat or my nerves.

Okay, Sebastian. You can do this. Just walk over there and talk to her.

I wiped my face, stepped forward, then instantly backpedaled. A man had broken away from the lingering Circe group and was approaching the couch. He was lean and tall, and probably in his early twenties, though it was difficult to tell; his deep set eyes and angular face made him seem older. His hair was like black ink, perfectly styled, and his clothes were the well-tailored kind. All in all, he looked like he’d just stepped off a red carpet. He leaned down and planted a kiss on Josephine’s glossy lips.

I felt like I’d swallowed a bucket of ice water.

‘Josie, I have something for you,’ he said in a voice out of a jewelry commercial.

Her eyes lit up. ‘What is it?’

Of course, she had a boyfriend. A girl like that couldn’t be single. The scorch of disappointment burned hotter than my feverish temperature. I knew I needed to turn away, but my body refused to move. I watched as the man – wearing a model-worthy smile – produced a small, rectangular box. My head swirled. Josephine opened it and took out something that resembled a necklace.

I didn’t see anything else.

The ice in my stomach exploded into nausea. I clutched my torso, stumbling for the door. I burst through the opening and hugged the support rope, trying to keep upright, though I couldn’t see straight. It was the worst I’d felt in days. I took frantic gulps of autumn air, trying not to puke or pass out, or whatever my body was desperate to do for relief. The cold burn of oxygen was like medicine. Gradually the queasiness subsided. I pressed my hands to my face until my vision cleared. My skin was hot, almost clammy.

‘Great timing,’ I said to no one in particular.

Now I could add stomach bugs to my record of ill-timed incidents, like having your hair dyed gray right before getting a part in the school play. Or attempting to talk to a girl at the exact moment her boyfriend arrives.

I took a deep breath, and then a scent I recognized with startling clarity flooded my nostrils. I spun so quickly that I nearly lost my balance. Josephine Romany stood at the entrance of the Holding Tent. Any attempt to act casual seemed impossible.

Josephine approached. ‘Sebastian?’

I blinked at her, numb for words. My chance at the second first-impression was diving faster than a stalled-out plane. My tongue finally dislodged itself from the roof of my mouth. ‘Hi, Josephine.’

I was surprised at how good it felt to say her name, as if it was meant to roll off my lips the way it did.

‘Are you okay?’ she asked, searching my face. ‘I saw you run out.’

I wasn’t sure what startled me more: the fact that she’d noticed me or the fact that she cared enough to enquire. ‘Oh, sure, totally fine. I just needed some air. It was really…hot…in there.’

Josephine didn’t seem convinced. Her head tilted as she studied me. I tried to smile but ended up squinting at my shoes instead. There was a long pause.

Mayday. Plane down.

‘Hey, would you like a tour of the Ferris wheel?’ she asked suddenly.

My head snapped up. ‘A tour?’

Her smile melted my insides. ‘Well, sure. We haven’t gotten much chance to talk since I arrived, and now it looks like we’re going to be in the school play together…’ She trailed off, looking at me with a sort of friendly pity.

We have a survivor.

I felt a little confidence return. I hadn’t totally self-destructed. At least, not yet.

‘That sounds great,’ I replied.

‘That is, if you’re sure you’re feeling all right,’ she added quickly.

‘No, I’m good. Everything’s good now.’

‘Awesome,’ she said, sounding happy. ‘No one around here ever wants to ride it with me.’