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‘I might...’ Eve sat down on the chair next to his desk, running her finger under the seal of the envelope and taking the A4 photographs out. She flipped through them carefully and Ben saw her cheeks burn red. Then a tear rolled down her cheek.
If Callie had upset Eve in any way, if she’d made her feel anything less than beautiful, she wouldn’t be coming back here. No more photographs, no more talking to his crew to gain their trust.
‘What’s up, Eve?’ He tried to banish the anger from his voice, speaking as gently and quietly as he could. Eve tipped her face up towards him and suddenly smiled.
‘Look at me, boss.’
As she handed the photos over, her hand shook. Ben took them, forcing himself to look.
There was one of Eve running, buttoning up her jacket as she went. Another of her climbing into the cabin of the fire engine. Eve’s frame seemed somehow diminutive next to her crewmates, but she was clearly one of a team and the angle from which the photographs had been shot showed her ahead of the men, not following on behind.
‘These are... Do you like them?’ Maybe Eve saw something in them that he didn’t.
‘Yes, I like them. I really like them.’
‘Me too.’ Ben looked at the next photograph, and saw what had prompted Eve’s tears.
‘Callie took this at your home?’
‘Yes, we made an arrangement for her to come and see me. What...do you think?’ Eve wiped the tears from her face with her sleeve.
She was sitting on the floor with her four-year-old son in her lap. Isaac was clutching a toy fire engine and Eve’s dark hair was styled softly around her face. She was wearing a sleeveless summer dress that showed the scars on her shoulder.
‘I think... It’s a lovely photograph of you and Isaac.’ Ben decided to concentrate on the mother and son aspect, and the love that shone in Eve’s face.
‘It is, isn’t it? I didn’t think...’ Eve shrugged.
‘Didn’t think what?’ Ben was still ready to spring to Eve’s defence, but perhaps he didn’t need to. Maybe she saw what he did, and that was what her tears were all about.
‘I didn’t think I’d ever wear that dress again. Callie and I talked about it for a while, she said that we could stop if I felt uncomfortable and that these photos were just for me, not anyone else.’
‘You should be proud of yourself, Eve.’ Somehow Callie had captured everything in the image. Eve’s love for her son, her strength and her vulnerability. The scars looked like badges of courage and they brought a lump to Ben’s throat.
‘Yes.’ Eve took the photographs back, hugging them to her chest as if they were something precious. ‘I’m going to show the guys.’
Ben put his own envelope to one side, slightly surprised that there was one, and stacked the rest back into the box. ‘Will you take these out with you? Make sure everyone gets just their own envelope.’
‘Yep.’ Eve paused, grinning. ‘So you’re not going to show me yours?’
His could hardly be as moving, or mean so much. He tore at the envelope, taking out the glossy prints.
‘Go on. Take a look.’ He handed them straight over to Eve. He didn’t much want to look himself, and find out how Callie saw him.
‘Nice... Very action hero.’ Eve laid the first photo down on his desk and Ben saw himself caught in the act of loading equipment onto the fire engine. A second showed him climbing into the cabin.
There was one more to go. And Eve was grinning suddenly.
‘Wow, boss. Never knew you were a pin-up.’
‘Neither did I.’ Ben reached for the photograph, snatching it from her.
Oh. He remembered that now. He’d been sitting in the ready room, after returning from the fire they’d been called to that afternoon. Watching as Callie had talked to a couple of the other firefighters. Suddenly she’d turned and pointed the camera at him.
Perhaps it was Ben’s imagination, but he thought he saw the subtle winding-down process after a call where there had been no casualties and the fire had been successfully contained. And there was something else. His eyes looked almost startlingly blue under tousled hair that was still wet from the shower.
‘Do I really look like that?’ For the first time in his life it occurred to Ben that he looked handsome.
‘Yeah, on a good day. Sometimes you look a bit rough...’ Eve laughed at his protests, narrowing her eyes to squint at the photograph. ‘Maybe she’s turned up the blue tones a bit. She explained to me how you do that. She said that she could turn down the red of my scars a bit but when we’d talked about it I decided that she shouldn’t. All or nothing, eh?’
‘Good decision. You can be very proud of your photos, Eve.’ Ben looked at his own photograph again. None of the other blues seemed to be so prominent. Maybe it was a trick of the light...
He decided not to think about it. Gathering up the photographs, he put them back into the envelope and threw it back into the box.
‘Here. If anyone wants to see these, you can show them.’ He led by example. If anyone on the crew wanted to see what Callie had made of him, they could have a good laugh over it.
‘Right, boss. Thanks.’ Eve put her envelope in the box with his and shot him a grin before she left him alone.
What Callie had made of him. It was a thought that wouldn’t go away, because the photograph had hinted at the smouldering heat that invaded his thoughts whenever he looked at her.
He shook the thoughts from his head. Christmas was only a week away and Callie would be back to take the photos for the calendar. He would be sure to thank her for her sensitivity with Eve and then he’d keep his distance. Ben didn’t trust himself to do anything else.
* * *
Callie had stared at Ben’s photograph for a long time before deciding to include it in his envelope. Perhaps it looked a like a come-on, betraying the way she saw him a little too clearly. But it was really just the way that the lens saw him. The camera was indifferent to him and incapable of lying. That image was all about Ben and nothing about her.
Her friends would have taken one look at the picture and told her that capturing Ben’s smile for real should be her number one priority over Christmas. But anyone who seriously thought she’d take that advice didn’t know much about her. Callie was all about avoiding risk.
It was one of the reasons she’d wanted this job so much. She’d wanted to understand what made the firefighters tick, what allowed them to do a dangerous job and then go home to their families afterwards. She’d been too young to understand when her father had failed to come home from work one day, but she’d understood her mother’s tears and in time she’d come to understand that he’d never be coming home.
She’d learned afterwards that her father had been a hero. A police officer, called to an armed robbery that had gone bad. He’d saved two of his fellow officers but he had been unable to save his own wife and child from the mistakes and hardships that had resulted from his death.
It was the best reason in the world not to get involved with Ben, a man who took risks for a living, like her father had. He might be mouth-wateringly handsome and Callie had always had a soft spot for men with a hard exterior and warm eyes. But he was very definitely on her not-to-do list this Christmas. It was okay for the camera to register his smouldering eyes but she wasn’t going to think about them.
One of the firefighters let her into the station on a crisp, cold Christmas Eve morning. Callie made her way to the ready room, adding the two dozen mince pies she’d made last night to the pile of boxes of Christmas fare in the kitchenette. Then she sat down, her camera ready, waiting for something to happen.
* * *
No sprayed-on jeans this morning. If he’d known in advance, Ben might have thought that Callie in a pair of serviceable trousers, heavy boots and a thick red hoodie would be an easier prospect. But that would have been a mistake because she still looked quite terrifyingly gorgeous.
He’d made sure that the photo of himself, captioned ‘Hunk of the Month’, had been taken down from the ready room notice-board. Everyone had taken their chance to have a good laugh, and there was no need for Callie to see it.
She was sitting quietly in the ready room. Blending in, as he’d seen her do before. Watchful, observing everything. He’d bet the silver sixpence from the Christmas pudding that she’d already sized up the decorations and the small tree in the corner of the room, deciding how best they might be put to use in her photographs.
‘You’re here.’ He suddenly couldn’t think of anything else to say.
‘Yes.’ She turned her green eyes up towards him thoughtfully. ‘So are you.’
That got the patently obvious out of the way. Ben sat down.
‘Eve showed me her pictures.’
She reddened a little, seeming to know exactly which of the pictures he was referring to. ‘You know that she called the shots?’
‘Yes, Eve told me that you’d talked about it all at some length, and that she was happy with what you’d done.’ Ben liked it that Callie was unsure what his reaction might be, and that she actually seemed to care what it was.
She nodded slowly, obviously pleased. ‘She rang me and said she’d be happy for them to be included in the pictures for the calendar.’
‘And what do you think?’
‘I think they’re exactly the kind of thing we want. But I’m going to leave it until after Christmas and give Eve some time to think about it. Sometimes people say yes to a proposal and then change their minds when it becomes a reality.’
‘I’ll leave you to sort that out with her.’ Two weeks ago it had been unthinkable that he could leave Callie to negotiate directly with his team, but now... Maybe her photographs had worked a little magic on him as well.
‘You’re expecting to be busy today?’ She asked the question with an air of innocence and Ben smiled.
‘Yes, we’re often busy over Christmas.’
‘I’m hoping that you’ll agree to my going with the crew on a call-out. The station commander gave me the go-ahead and I’ve signed the waiver. But the final decision’s down to you.’
He’d been half expecting this. For someone who was so invested in how things looked, it was impossible that her own appearance didn’t mean something. She’d even ditched the bulky camera, replacing it with a smaller one that might easily be stowed away inside a jacket.
‘Can you earn it?’ The words slipped out before he could stop them. He usually put things a little more tactfully than that, wrapping it all up in talk about basic fitness and health and safety procedures.
If it was the little tilt of her chin that he’d wanted to see, she didn’t disappoint him. Neither did the defiance in her eyes.
‘Just watch me.’
CHAPTER THREE
CALLIE WOULD HAVE thought that four years working as a first response paramedic might have allowed some of the more basic procedures to go without saying. But it appeared that Ben took nothing for granted.
‘Don’t forget to stand where he tells you.’ Eve’s eyes flashed with humour as she whispered the words to Callie.
‘Sorry about this...’ The yard wasn’t the place to be in this freezing weather, and everyone looked as if they’d rather be in the ready room, making inroads into the stack of Christmas food.
Eve grinned. ‘It’s not you. He does it with everyone. Everyone he likes, that is...’
Right. This was obviously the hurdle that she had to jump to gain entry to the team. She could respect that, there was no such thing as being too careful when your job involved the kinds of risks that the crew faced every day.
‘Callie! Over there...’ Ben shouted, and she started. She was already standing well out of the way of the fire crew, and the point he’d indicated precluded any good photographic shots of the imaginary conflagration.
She ran obediently to her allotted spot and he nodded, seeming to be fighting back a grin. ‘All right. Thanks, everyone.’
The crew followed his lead, at ease now as they left their positions and started to meander back inside. Ben was suddenly one of them again, just another member of the crew, but Callie was under no illusions that as soon as the alert bell rang, he’d be their leader again.
‘Did I pass?’ She murmured the words to him as he strolled back across the yard towards her.
‘Yeah. Full marks.’ This time he allowed himself to smile. ‘Make sure you do the same when this is for real.’
This wasn’t for real? Full marks meant that she had a chance of going with the crew on their next call-out. That made it real enough.
They didn’t have long to wait. When the alarm sounded, Callie was on her feet with the others, pulling on the high-vis protective jacket with ‘Observer’ written across the back of it.
She was familiar with the sound of a siren but it usually emanated from her own rapid response vehicle. The fire engine made more noise and she wasn’t used to the sway of the vehicle or to being squashed between Eve and one of the other firefighters while someone else did the driving. Neither was she accustomed to feeling like a parcel, only there for the ride.
But she did as she’d been told, waiting for the firefighters to get out of the vehicle before she did. Smoke and flame plumed upwards from what looked like a storage yard behind a brick wall.
‘Callie, stay right back. There are gas canisters in there.’ There was a popping sound as one of the canisters exploded in the heat of the conflagration. Ben didn’t look back to make sure that she complied with the instruction as he hurried towards the back of the fire truck, where the crew was already deploying two long hoses.
Water played over the top of the wall, another jet aimed at a gate to one side. Callie knew that the angles were carefully chosen to maximise the effect of the hoses, but it seemed that no one had actually made that decision. It was just a team, working together apparently seamlessly.
Photographs. That was what she was here for. She’d almost forgotten the camera in her hand in favour of watching Ben. In charge, ever watchful and yet allowing his crew to do their jobs without unnecessary orders from him. It was a kind of trust that she wished he might bestow on her.
He turned, waving her further back, pointing to a spot beside the police cordon. At least she was out of his line of sight now, and she could remove the heavy gloves that made it practically impossible to take photographs. Not that it mattered all that much. She was standing so far back that the people behind the cordon probably had as good a chance of taking a meaningful shot as she did.
I hate this. She was used to working on her own and making her own decisions. But if she proved she could comply with Ben’s orders, he might ease up on her a bit.
In the meantime, she’d do what she could. Callie turned for a shot of the cordon, people lined up behind it watching anxiously. Some were passers-by who’d stopped, while others in bright-coloured sweaters and dresses rather than coats had obviously been evacuated from the houses closest to the blaze. Over the steady thrum of the fire engine and the roar of the flames she could hear a child crying and another babbling in excitement.
Panning back towards the firefighters, a movement caught her eye. A twitch of the curtains in one of the houses in the row next to the yard. When Callie pressed the zoom, she saw a head at the front window.
‘Ben...!’ She ran towards the fire engine, screaming above the noise, and he glanced back towards her. ‘Over there, look.’ She pointed to the window and he turned suddenly, making for the house. He’d seen what she had, that the police evacuation had left someone behind.
It appeared that since he’d given Callie no indication that she should move, he expected her to stay where she was. Forget that. Callie tucked the camera into her jacket and followed Ben.
‘Go back. We’ve got it...’ They met on the doorstep. The woman had disappeared from the window and without a second glance at Callie he bent down, flipping open the letterbox to look through it and then calling out.
‘That’s right, my love. Open the door. No... No, don’t sit down. You need to open the door for me.’
Suddenly he puffed out a breath and straightened, turning to Eve, who had arrived at his side. ‘We have an elderly woman sitting on the floor, leaning against the front door. We’ll go in through the window.’
Eve nodded and Ben reached into his pocket, pulling out a window punch. It took one practised movement to break one of the small glass panes in the windows at the front of the house.
‘Callie, I won’t say it again. You’re in the way...’ He didn’t look round as he reached in, slipping the catch and swinging the window open.
‘Since when was a paramedic in the way when you have a possible trauma? You should be getting out of my way.’ Callie resisted the temptation to kick him. Playing along with Ben at the fire station was one thing, but this wasn’t the time or the place.
He turned quickly, a look of shock on his face. Then he took the helmet from Callie’s hand, securing the strap under her chin and snapping down the visor. ‘Put your gloves on. Stay behind me at all times. Eve, stay here and let me know if the fire looks as if it’s coming our way.’
He pushed the net curtains to one side and climbed in, turning to help Callie through the window. She ignored his outstretched hand and followed him. When he led the way through to the hallway, Callie saw an elderly woman sitting on the floor behind the door. Her eyes were closed but her head was upright so she was probably conscious. Callie tapped Ben’s arm to get his attention.
‘Did she fall?’
‘I don’t think so. She just seemed to slide down the wall.’
‘Okay.’ Standing back wasn’t an option now and neither was staying behind him. The house wasn’t on fire and Ben’s skills were of secondary use to her. Callie pushed past him and knelt down beside the woman, taking off her helmet and gloves. She wasn’t used to working with these kinds of constrictions.
‘Hi, I’m Callie, I’m a paramedic from the London Ambulance Service.’
The woman looked up at her with placid blue eyes. It seemed that the urgency of the situation had escaped her, and Callie saw a hearing aid, caught in the white hair that wisped around her face, with the ear mould hanging loose. She was clutching a pair of glasses that looked so grimy that they could only serve to obscure her sight.
Great. No wonder she hadn’t responded when Ben had called through the letter box. Callie gently disentangled the hearing aid, putting it in her pocket. There was no time now to do anything other than make do with what the woman could hear and see.
‘Are you hurt?’ She tipped the woman’s face around, speaking clearly.
‘No, dear.’
‘Have you fallen?’
The woman stared at her, her hand fluttering to her chest. Callie heard Ben close the sitting-room door so that more smoke didn’t blow through the house from the broken window. The smell of burning was everywhere, filtering through every tiny opening from the outside, and Callie knew that the air quality in here wasn’t good.
She felt a light touch on her shoulder. ‘You’re happy to move her?’
Suddenly Ben was deferring to her. Callie’s quick examination had shown no sign of injury and the woman’s debility and confusion might well be as a result of smoke inhalation. On balance, the first priority was to get her into the fresh air.
‘Yes.’
Thankfully, he didn’t waste any time questioning her decision. Ben used his shortwave radio to check with Eve that their exit was still clear and helped Callie get the woman to her feet. Her legs were jerking unsteadily and it was clear that she couldn’t walk.
‘Can you take her?’ She’d be safe in Ben’s strong arms. He nodded, lifting the woman carefully, and Callie scooted out of the way, opening the front door.
Outside, the fire in the yard was almost out, quantities of black smoke replacing the flames. Ben didn’t slacken his pace until he’d reached the cordon, and as a police officer shepherded them through, a woman ran up to them.
‘Mae... Mae, it’s Elaine. Elaine Jacobs...’ The older woman didn’t respond, and the younger one turned to Ben. ‘Bring her to my house. Over there...’
‘Thanks.’ Ben shot a glance at Callie and she nodded. There was nowhere else other than the police car to set Mae down and examine her.
Ben carefully carried his precious burden into the small, neat sitting room, and Mrs Jacobs motioned him towards a long sofa that stretched almost the length of one wall. He put Mae down carefully and turned to Callie.
‘Ambulance?’
‘Yes, thanks.’
‘Okay, I’ll see to it.’ He turned to Mae, giving her a smile, and her gaze followed him out of the room.
‘I’m all right.’ Mae seemed to be addressing no one in particular, and Callie guessed that she was trying to reassure herself as much as anyone else. She touched her hand to catch her attention.
‘I know you are. Just let me make sure, eh?’
CHAPTER FOUR
HOWEVER HARD HE tried to put Callie into a box, she just seemed to spring straight out again. He’d thought her capable of steamrolling over him and his crew if he allowed her to, and then she’d shown herself to be sensitive enough to make a difference to the way Eve saw herself. Ben had tried to limit her to the role of observer, and she’d shown him that she wasn’t just that either.
Perhaps he had trust issues. It made no difference what Callie did, he couldn’t bring himself to trust the warmth that her mere presence sparked in his chest. Maybe he never would truly trust a woman that he was attracted to ever again.
When he knocked on Mrs Jacobs’s front door, he meant to stay on the doorstep, but she wouldn’t have any of it, ushering him inside and telling him that he couldn’t possibly compete with the mess that her two teenagers were capable of making. Callie was kneeling beside Mae, chatting to her, and looked up when he entered the sitting room.
‘Everything all right?’
‘Yes. The fire’s out and we’re making everything safe.’ He trusted his crew. He’d trusted Callie, back at the house, when she’d snapped suddenly into the role of paramedic. Maybe that was what he should remember, rather than the way her smile seemed to plunge his whole world into chaos.
‘The ambulance is on its way?’
‘Yes.’
Mae had turned her gaze up toward them, obviously following their conversation. By the simple expediency of cleaning her glasses and making sure that her hearing aids were seated correctly, Callie had wrought an amazing change in the elderly lady. Ben bent down, smiling at Mae.
‘How are you feeling now?’
‘Callie says I have to go to the hospital...’ Her voice was cracked and hoarse, but it was difficult to tell whether that was the effect of emotion or smoke inhalation. ‘On Christmas Eve...’
‘It’s best to be on the safe side. If it were me, I’d take her advice.’
He heard a sharp intake of breath behind him. Mae’s presence in the room had probably saved him from the humiliation of one of Callie’s put-downs.
Mae’s questioning gaze focussed somewhere to his left, and he turned. Callie’s smile was almost certainly for Mae’s benefit, but still it made Ben’s heart thump.
‘I’ll come to the hospital with you, Mae. We’ll find ourselves a handsome doctor in a Santa hat, eh?’
‘Thank you dear. You’re very kind.’ Mae managed a smile. ‘I’ll pick a nice doctor for you.’
Callie chuckled. ‘Make sure you do. I don’t want just any old one.’
He couldn’t do anything to help with the journey to the hospital but he could make things a bit better for Mae’s return. ‘I know someone who’ll board up the window for you. I’ll write their number down...’
Mrs Jacobs rummaged in a drawer and produced a pen and paper. Ben scribbled the number on it and handed it to Callie. ‘Tell them I gave you their details. They’ll liaise with the insurance company and help get things moving.’