How to Hear Yourself and Start Creating

Reality Engine

“Everything is theater, and nothing is theater. We are certain figures, here and there. Sometimes against the backdrop of the stage, sometimes against a transcendental backdrop. But in any case, it is a game.” (Viktor Frankl, “Synchronization in Birkenwald”)

Why am I talking about a game? Imagine that your life is a game.

You're looking at a computer platform, like a Roblox game. You log in, choose a game created by someone else, and play by its rules. You're assigned an avatar (body, appearance, and outfit), roles, functions, limitations, and abilities.

There is another option - you can create your own game (like in Roblox Studio), then you yourself determine all your parameters, roles, rules and path.

For a long time, we've been engrossed in the system's established order: "kindergarten - school - college - work - retirement," "marriage and three children as a mandatory life plan," and other generally accepted scenarios. For example, our focus is currently only on the external: material desires (a car, an apartment, a summer house, a yacht) or images of others, glimpsed on social media, of successful success and repeating other people's experiences. This is neither good nor bad, because no one will judge us. It's important for everyone to experience their own place and level of play.

But when we realize that everything old doesn't work, or is no longer interesting, then we want to dig deeper, understand how the world works and find our own place in it.

Over 20 years ago, the Wachowskis' film "The Matrix," starring Keanu Reeves, was released. Since then, the idea that reality isn't what it seems, but rather resembles software - software into which we've been downloaded and forced to see the world as real - has begun to gain traction in the media.

Terms like "simulation," "virtual reality," and "parallel realities" are beginning to be used. All of this was well demonstrated in the film "The Thirteenth Floor," as well as in contemporary examples like "Don't Worry, Darling" and "Ready Player One."

If we take the very idea of a game superficially, we might limit ourselves to the influence of computer technology on life or the role of artificial intelligence, even to the point of taking over our will. We might become extremely frightened, ceasing to use technology and neural networks, going to the other extreme, or even physically retreating into the forest, shutting ourselves off from everything.

Until we live our own lives, it’s as if we’re watching someone else’s exciting “movie”

Concepts and ideas are emerging in the information field that there can be many different realities (or branches of realities), and we control them through thought and intention (all this is well reflected, for example, in the book and film “The Secret” or the works of Vadim Zeland).

Various techniques related to creating vision maps and affirmations are becoming popular in society, such as the famous quote from the film "The Most Charming and Attractive": "I am the most charming and attractive. All men are crazy about me." And that before creating a reality, you need to verbalize it, think about it, or create a collage from photographs and magazine clippings. The number of vision map creation services is growing every day. The very idea that reality can be influenced is no longer new; it is carefully ingrained in people's minds and influences the emergence of various philosophical movements.

And gradually, concepts like "matrix," which denote a certain program, a systemic role-playing game, or a quest, are becoming increasingly embedded in the foundations of the worldview (especially in the vastness of training schools or YouTube). In simple terms, it's a reality simulator, just like in the aforementioned films. A complex quest with various levels and roles that can be assumed and played out within the context of one's own life. And, of course, with rules of the game that cannot be broken, because any violation of the rules entails punishment from the matrix or system itself.

So, let's imagine that upon arriving on Earth, players - initially free and with their own purpose - gradually connect to the shared matrix system, perhaps with the help of their parents and others (and all this without the virtual reality headsets of "Ready Player One"). They begin to fulfill established roles, follow a routine, and, with age, acquire knowledge of all the rules and regulations of this quest.

The "guardians," or rather the structures that ensure order and the functioning of this game, are numerous organizations. Each creates its own rules - for example, at an institute, a school, a state, a factory, a family, a bank, a store. Like honeycombs in a hive, they shape the rights and responsibilities of the players and contribute to the overall game's control.

While a person plays this game, unaware that they are inside it, as if existing by inertia, in a dormant state, they are completely under its control. They experience a captivating dream, observing a reality that has been shaped for them, like in the film "Don't Worry, Darling."

The system controls and binds participants with powerful emotional hooks - fear, guilt, shame, resentment - and this keeps most from becoming aware and awakening. Even random glitches or system errors don't bother participants until there's a willingness within the soul to go beyond the rabbit hole.

Perhaps some of you, as a child or even as an adult, experienced the feeling during difficult, strange or incomprehensible events of unreality of everything that was happening, as if we were watching some bad movie, and we just needed to wake up.

In psychology, this phenomenon is attributed to the psyche's defense mechanisms, such as walling off and repression. But these sensations occur not on a mental level, but rather in the memories of our souls. We all possess this memory in one way or another, differing in our ability and willingness to penetrate the layers of accumulated programming.

More often than not, unlike the pretty picture of a Californian town from a 1950s fashion magazine, typical life within the Matrix game can resemble an endless, joyless slog from work to home and back again. While the Matrix is strong, society is instilled with corresponding value systems, such as "build a house, plant a tree, have a son," along with recommendations on what to do and what not to do while you're alive.

The system can punish and take away everything. For example, from those who actively and openly fight it, from those who fiercely resist it, from revolutionaries. Or it can heavily reward those who perform the best, the so-called "high performers" of certain political and corporate structures, with special perks, power, and money. This takes away freedom of the soul, since any contract requires compliance with the rules and a contribution to the system. No one receives power and enormous sums of money from the system for nothing.

The structures themselves also change over time, some of them become obsolete and disappear into oblivion (for example, the Komsomol), some are simply transformed (the same institution of marriage is now completely different from what it was 20 years ago).

The metaphor of the "dormant state" was beautifully captured in the Disney cartoon "Soul," where a stockbroker sat in his office, practically sleepwalking. He kept repeating the same mantra: "I need to make money, watch the stocks, money, money, money..." staring at his computer monitor. Meanwhile, his soul wandered through the depths of outer space, accumulating ever more layers of darkness and becoming some kind of monster. When the main characters accidentally tugged at this monster, it shed this ballast of darkness, and the broker awakened as if from a dream, throwing aside papers and stationery, shouting to the entire office, "I'm free!"

Different branches of reality...

At the moment when the standard path of “graduated from school to go to college to find a job to buy an apartment… and so on in the same circle all the way to reserving a place in the cemetery” begins to raise questions and a feeling arises that something is wrong here, an understanding of the artificiality or limitations of this scenario comes.

A person reflects on their own purpose, tries to break free from established patterns and find their own. This process is often called "awakening," or "waking up."

But more often, a person is simply pushed out of their usual circle by extreme and difficult events, a series of resets, when matter and the entire surrounding space collapses. These painful events seem to signal and begin to scream: "Look deeper, go beyond, reflect on meaning!" We know examples of such events – from natural or man-made disasters to the bankruptcies of previously successful businesses, difficult divorces, deaths, separations, and military actions.

From the outside, it seems that a person is simply pushed out by the familiar environment, prompting him to become more aware faster.

The task is not easy, even for the brave, because the system actively resists its players' exit, imposing numerous temptations and capturing the mental and emotional airwaves. Remember the "we're all going to die" news stories. They divert attention from the truth to the matrix scenario. They continue to feed on people's negative emotions and sway them into a reaction of fear or guilt (conspiracy theories, for example). They pull strings, pressing on those pain points - triggers - that distract attention for a long time. Or they test and tempt, offering ever new needs, desires, and ambitions (you definitely need a new phone, or another mortgage at 30%).

There's nothing inherently good or bad about the matrix or its structures - it's simply a system. One can only marvel at its complexity and be amazed by the incredible visuals of this game. And how seriously we all play it.

But when you recognize yourself as a soul, and not as the script, role, or function the matrix demands of you, you gradually free yourself from its grip and begin to live your own captivating life. This means approaching every interaction consciously, understanding how the system works and what its rules are. And now, instead of being subject to its actions and laws, you use it for your own benefit when needed.

As long as we don't live in a remote forest or are alone in the mountains of Tibet, we still need to interact with the system and its structures (after all, sometimes we need to go to the Market center, use banking products, renew our passports, and so on). But on a different level: calmly following its rules in the present moment, without resisting or internally criticizing them. Don't make the functioning of alien systems and structures the focus of your entire life, devoting energy, effort, and time to them.

And regularly asking myself: “Who am I in this?”

We learn from quests from childhood, deeply immersing ourselves in them.

Oddly enough, playing other people's games is very exciting and interesting, but only up to a certain point. Until you get bored, or you've already "outgrown" the game, knowing all its tricks, levels, and prizes at the end. This can be clearly observed in children, as well as in anyone involved in various computer games.

Let me give you an example. Just recently, I participated in a walkthrough of the horror game Poppy Playtime with my son. He couldn't get past the final stage of the first season, where the main character, with multicolored arms, runs through the ventilation system of Huggy Waggy, trying to reach the right door, navigating every nook and cranny and labyrinth. You run left and right, following the signs on the wall, and at any moment, a monster with a creepy sound and abrupt animation can jump out at you. This makes you jump in surprise every time, reacting to the jumpscare. My son became so frustrated with each failure that he started getting angry. His anger and irritation grew with each attempt and eventually spilled onto the surrounding objects, chairs, and, of course, me, as the cause of all the problems. I tried to explain to him that this game wasn't worth such negative emotions. It was useless, since he was already one hundred percent involved and his body was reacting automatically.

Eventually, we found the instructions and suggested routes: where to go and what to do, and we sketched out the arrows in a notebook. I even started coaching him: "Right, left, down, bend over, don't look back..." We learned about the coveted Shift key, which allows you to run fast rather than just walk. By pressing this key, my son navigated the ventilation labyrinth on his first try, reached the right spot, slammed Huggy Waggie with a giant box, and finished the first season of this game. Delight, happiness, euphoria, and... an increased number of gray hairs on my mother, along with frayed nerves.

How much does this reflect our entire life, which is essentially the same quest, a wandering game with many tasks, difficulties, and horror. The more we let's get involved the more we play this game, the more we experience emotions of all ranks and scales: from disappointment, anxiety, anger, fear, to positive, yet still temporary, ones. In fact, it's all just a game, and not ours, one we've immersed ourselves in. You can't quit if your interest in it hasn't waned.

And until you've had enough of these games, you'll find yourself playing them over and over again. Career, house, loans, cars, mortgages, problems, jobs, expenses, everyday issues, constant fuss and achievement, and we get angry, afraid, anxious, looking for surrogate relaxation, and so on in a circle.

As soon as the interest wears off, you exit the game, or rather, you simply realize what’s happening, and you can breathe a sigh of relief…

Unpacking the Human

"When you look at the stars, think of one of them as my soul." (Optimus Prime, Transformers: Age of Extinction)

Until we understand how our personality is structured, with all its conscious and unconscious aspects, we will continue to struggle with its manifestations. We will push things into the back of our minds, for example, negative emotions, refuse to accept all its parts, or take on unnecessary burdens and baggage.

The secret is in knowledge, and this is a great power.

You can continue to succumb to the influence of your own demons, fighting them, unconsciously tearing yourself apart, not understanding what's awakened within you right now, or why you think and feel the way you do. Or you can begin to reflect and explore where we perceive everything from, and whether our thoughts and emotions are truly OURS.

Philosophical movements and practices, including, for example, yoga, view the human being as a broader system, not limited to the physical body. After all, we think and feel—but we can't touch it, right? This means there's a lot we can't see with our own eyes, but it exists.

We won't discuss the basic systems of human life learned in school (from digestion to respiration) here, but rather delve a little deeper into more metaphysical foundations. The body can be easily tangible, such as legs or arms, or invisible, like our thoughts, while still being a part of us. This is precisely what the term "subtle bodies" or levels, as we will call them in this book, explains.

In addition to the physically observable body, there are also invisible subtle bodies.

Moving from denser bodies or levels to more subtle ones, let's imagine the following order (in this book, I'll only give examples of four of them; information about the other levels can be found in various sources if you wish). All of them are closely interconnected.

So, let's begin…

Physical Body Level

The easily tangible and visible part of us. Appearance, height, constitution, how we are structured and built.

We can touch, feel, and stroke, sensing muscles or skin. Some processes in the physical body occur unconsciously, for example, the reactions of internal organs, while others we feel and are aware of. Tension in the chest, pressure in the abdomen, muscle fatigue, or, conversely, a lightness in the body when nothing hurts.

Connecting with the body is a very important moment, because often our thoughts take us to unknown distances, and now we are far removed from the body, losing contact with it.

Anxiety and fears about the future can so completely block certain areas of the body that we can't even feel what's happening. Panic attacks, the ultimate form of anxiety, lead to a complete systemic breakdown. Recall the scene in the cartoon "Inside Out 2," when Riley experiences something similar during a hockey game: palpitations, hand tremors, shortness of breath. In such states, fainting can even occur; the body no longer simply tells us, but screams: "Something's wrong, danger lies ahead!"

You've probably heard the phrase "grounding and connecting with the body." What does this mean? In moments when your mind is particularly "flying off," for example, when you've wandered off into the future, the past, fears, and various rehearsals of situations, you can return to the here and now through grounding.

Grounding is, literally, connecting with reality through contact with nature and our planet on a physical level. Walking barefoot on the earth or grass, going for a walk, listening to birdsong, experiencing your body through any practice - bathing, yoga, exercise, jogging. Inhale and exhale, simply breathe deeply for a while, or gently stroke your skin.

If we didn't have a body, we might be able to fly in airless space like light whirlwinds, but that would be a completely different story. We are here on planet Earth and are in the body, which means we must use this connection with nature and life itself through it.

Nature, forests, trees - our helpers to quickly “come to our senses”

Take a deep breath and ask yourself: “What do you feel in your own body at this moment?”

Mentally go through every part of your body, starting with your feet and ending with your head and arms. How your body feels right now, for example, does it feel lightness, tension, or pain in any particular area? This simple daily practice is what makes up our lives. Yoga even has a separate branch called yoga nidra, where, lying in shavasana with your eyes closed, you focus your attention on every part of your body, trying not to fall asleep. Observe your physical sensations, focusing on them, rather than following your thoughts, which, of course, never go away.

If we constantly repress and fail to process negative emotions, this blocks our body and leads to psychosomatic reactions. This has long been known as a fact in psychology and medicine. There are numerous dictionaries and reference books on symptomology and psychosomatics1[1], which describes in detail how the body reacts to long-term stress and health-destroying emotions.

Even a momentary thought that evokes the emotion of fear, for example, will immediately trigger a reaction in the body (the jaw tenses or a tightening of the chest). One can imagine the tension, immense blocks, and pain that chronic worry, stress, fear, and anxiety cause. This leads to problems with weight, skin, digestion, and a host of other consequences.

Energy Level (Etheric Body)

The body's energy level, whether it's energized or de-energized. How we feel in terms of our internal strength. For example, fatigue and a constant lack of energy: "I just woke up, got out of bed, and I'm already tired." Or, when the body is on fire and ready for new feats and accomplishments, you feel like a charged broom or a bouncy ball.