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“Yes. It will,” Tessa cried dejectedly, the images her sister painted striking her hard. “It will give him leverage. I can’t trust him.”
Dia let her go and stepped back. “No one says you have to marry the man, for God’s sake.”
“No one but him.”
“Oh, get real.” Tessa arched a brow and Dia’s features stretched taut as she said, “You’re serious?”
“Don’t listen to the messages on your private line much, do you? I called you immediately after our lunch, all night and this morning.”
Dia’s gazed faltered. “I was...out of town for the evening.”
Tessa gave her sister the once-over, then smiled softly. At least someone was having fun, she thought, then explained their lunch date.
Dia folded her arms and propped her hip against the counter, looking very much the high-powered attorney. “Did he badger you?”
Arranging ribbons on a dowel rod, Tessa gave her a side glance. “No.”
“Would you consider his visit harassment?”
“No.” How could she? He’d helped her, saw that her best customer was satisfied, and had only her best health in mind, damn him. If he hadn’t forced her to rest, she’d have kept going and that wouldn’t have been good for her or her baby.
“If we put a restraining order on him, it might make him pursue custody.”
“Then don’t.” Tessa dropped her head back onto her shoulders, sighing long and slow. “I’m not due for another three months—let’s not look for trouble. Maybe he’ll lose interest.”
When Dia didn’t respond, Tessa looked at her sister. “Don’t hold your breath,” she finally said.
Tessa felt as if she were tottering on a peg with nothing to stop her fall, waiting for the shove that would send her into oblivion. “Go ahead, say it, I see it in your eyes.”
“I’ve never seen a man more determined to be a father, Tessa.”
“Me, either,” came dispiritedly.
Dia laid a hand on her arm, forcing Tessa to meet her gaze and listen hard. “Then perhaps for once in your life you ought to quit planning out every facet with annoyingly meticulous detail and just go with it.”
Tessa eyed her warily. “You like him, don’t you?”
Dia shrugged elegantly clad shoulders. “I’m not the one who matters, but yes. He’s charming, handsome, smart, a decorated ex-Marine, owns his own business, comes from a good family.” Her eyes sparkled suddenly, devilishly. “Has two drop-dead gorgeous brothers—”
“Great.” She rolled her eyes. “If he’s won you over, what chance have I got? And isn’t that conflict of interest or something?”
“Hey, I wouldn’t worry so much, Sis,” Dia said, slinging her arm over her sister’s shoulder and dropping a kiss to her temple. “He hasn’t met Mom or Samantha. They’ll make any man run for the hills.”
Tessa laughed softly at the picture of her eccentric mother and Chase in the same room. Even though she never wanted him that deep into her life, it would be something to see. She wondered idly what he’d say if her mother read his palm before ever speaking to him.
The door chime jingled and Tessa said goodbye to her, sister. Dia flipped open her cellular phone, thumb-dialed a call as she grabbed her briefcase and left the shop in a brisk walk. Dia needed to slow down, Tessa thought. She was always in a rush to be somewhere she wasn’t.
Tessa walked over to the customer, smiling and offering herb tea. The older, distinguished-looking woman smiled back, so warm and endearingly gentle that Tessa felt the tension in her wash away like a summer rain. This was the first person in a long time to look at her and not her tummy. As Tessa went to prepare tea, she decided that Chase Madison could be as charming and as likable as he wanted. Her guard was up, cemented into place, and ex-Marine or not, he wasn’t storming past it.
Chase’s gaze snapped up from the pile of tomatoes so. carefully arranged in the bin. “Are you following me?” he asked hopefully.
“Hardly.” Tessa’s eyes narrowed on him, her hand on her hip. “I could ask the same of you.”
“Yes.” Unashamed, reckless.
“What?”
“I found out you shopped here, every Monday morning, at nine.” His forehead wrinkled a bit. “Are you always so predictable?”
“No.” She jammed tomatoes into a plastic sack.
“Careful, they’ll bruise.”
“I want to bruise you,” she hissed over the stack of red fruits.
Chase’s grin widened.
“Will you quit smiling!”
He didn’t. “Bothers you, doesn’t it?”
“Everything about you bothers me.” She dropped her selection into the cart and moved on.
Chase rounded the bin and dogged her heels. “What bothers you the most? That I’m the father of our baby or that you’re attracted to me?”
“Is your ego always so overblown, Mr. Madison?”
He caught the cart, keeping her near, and Tessa felt her insides shift and twist. And it had nothing, absolutely nothing to do with her baby. Those disgustingly sculptured shoulders of his looked bigger and more muscular than when he was in her shop on Saturday, his eyes a darker blue and unspeakably intimate as they traveled the line of her body, caressing it without touching. As if they weren’t in the middle of the produce aisle drawing attention, for heaven’s sake.
“Admit it, you feel this—” he inhaled through clenched teeth, his gaze simmering “—this assault on the senses, the blood, every time we get close.”
“Sexual attraction is hardly the basis for a relationship—” Oh, what made her admit that?
“Aha. So you have thought about it.”
He was grinning again, the rat. “No.” Her reddening cheeks contradicted her.
“Liar.”
“I’m not lying. Now, leave me alone.” She brushed him aside with the cart. He was right beside her, nodding to the eavesdroppers and interested customers.
“I’m here, Tessa, to stay. Get used to it.” Half threat, half coaxing.
“Not a chance.” She wouldn’t look at him, dropping item after item into her cart.
Chase knew he was getting to her. “God, you eat that?”
She looked to see what he meant and frowned, then snatched up the sardines, replaced them on the shelf and reached for tuna. Oh, just go away, she thought.
“Got you all confused, don’t I? Wondering where I’ll turn up next?”
She spared him a withering glance. “Amuse yourself with the idea, Mr. Madison. You have so far.”
“I’m going to do more than amuse myself with it,” he said with a long glance down her body. Those eyes were dangerous, she thought, and was about to ask him what he had planned in the let’s-rness-up-Tessa’s-life scenario, when someone called out.
“Hey boss, you’re needed on the site!”
Chase twisted, nodding to a man dressed in work clothes, a tool belt slung over his shoulder, a cellular phone in his hand.
Chase looked back at Tessa, loving her wide, puzzled eyes. He had her flustered nicely, he thought, and let impulse take him. He wrapped his arm around her, pulling her flush against him. His child kicked, as if joining its mother’s effort as she pushed at his chest.
“Let go.” She glanced around nervously, then looked at him, embarrassment blooming in her face.
He bent, inhaling the scent of cinnamon near her ear, and whispered, “I can’t. I’ve never walked away from a challenge.” His words burned her skin, sending gooseflesh down her throat to her breasts. “And baby or not, Tessa Lightfoot—” Her fingers flexed on his chest and she closed her eyes. “It’s you I want.”
Even though she would never believe him, his words sank into her heart like tiny arrows, weakening her resolve. She pushed at his chest. “No, Chase, you can’t,” she whispered back, then gasped as his lips ground against her neck in a hot, quick kiss before he pulled away.
They stared at each other for an instant and Tessa touched her throat, feeling warm and tingly all over. That was... was... delicious.
He smiled slowly, privately. Then he left her standing in the middle of the aisle between the cabbages and kumquats. Gripping the cart, Tessa watched him, his broad back, his indecently tight behind. Her heart pounding in her throat, her body awake and alive with sweet, quick passion. It had been so long she almost didn’t recognize the sensation. Not that it had ever been like that. And she wondered, hoped, she had at least some effect on him.
When he met up with his crewman and back-stepped to look at her, Tessa’s gaze dropped briefly to the well-worn mold of his jeans. She smiled, smug as realization played across his face. His skin darkened, his expression sheepish as he shoved his hands into his pockets.
She wasn’t without a little power.
And it made them even.
Later that evening, Carole Anne Madison shifted to the edge of the Queen Anne tapestry settee, her hands poised on her lap as she stared up at her eldest son. Chase saw her gaze flick to his father, the pipe clenched in his teeth. Idly, Chase wondered if it was lit this time.
. “She’s a lovely woman, Chase.”
“You saw her!” Chase’s wide eyes narrowed suddenly. “She didn’t know it was you, did she? God, Mom, if she thinks we’re all ganging up on her, she might leave town!” He paced, wearing a path in the carpet. The last thing he wanted was to scare Tessa.
“Chase dearest, please.”
“You’re mother isn’t an imbecile, Chase, don’t treat her like one.”
“Carl, hush. He’s just concerned, as we all are.” She patted the space beside her, and Chase paced a bit more, then sank down beside her, rubbing his hand over his face.
“I like her, Chase. She’s poised, gracious. One can tell a great deal about a person when you’re in their territory.”
Though those were not the traits Tessa had shown him, Chase took his mother’s word for it. “And you discovered?”
Carole Anne looked thoughtful before she spoke. “She makes everyone feel welcome, instantly. Even offered tea and joined me to have it. She’s very honest about her designs and whom they suit.” His mother paused, her eyes unusually bright. “And your baby’s growing beautifully.” Chase enjoyed the happiness spreading across his mother’s face.
His father cleared his throat. “It’s just like you to do everything backwards, boy.”
Chase stiffened and left his chair in a lurch, wondering if his father would ever forgive him for not becoming a politician. As usual, his mother defended him with a sharp glare at his dad.
“Do you think Janis did this thing with the computer mix-up?” his mother asked.
Chase shrugged. “I wouldn’t put it past her.” He didn’t want to address his suspicions, not when Tessa could use them to keep him out of his child’s life. Things were just too fragile right now. “But then we all know how she hated being excommunicated from the Madison clan.” The divorce settlement had nearly made Chase broke, and he eyed his father, all too aware that the man had never liked Janis, thought she was a gold digger, and had let him know it on a regular basis. Yet Chase had understood her need to feel part of a family. Of course, only Senator Madison’s family would do. His dad thought Janis had married him because of who his father was, and finally, Chase had been inclined to believe it.
“Oh, Chase,” his mother said suddenly. “But this is so wonderful.” He gazed at her and saw tears, tears she never shed in front of anyone. He sank to one knee in front of her. “I hoped that you or your brothers would find women to love like I love your father.” Beyond them, Carl Madison softened, in expression and posture, and he came to his wife, settling beside her and enfolding her hand in his.
“I’m not in love with Tessa Lightfoot, Mom.” In lust would be a better word. He couldn’t believe how turned on he was by this particular woman, pregnant or not: “And I can truthfully say she wishes I was never born.”
Carole Anne’s brow wrinkled softly. “She really is obstinate about your involvement?”
“She wants me gone. Trust me.”
Carole Anne smiled slightly. “But you like her.”
The corner of Chase’s mouth quirked. “Oh yes.”
“That’s all I needed to hear,” she said succinctly. “We’ll stand back and promise not to interfere. At all.” His mother looked pointedly at his father. “Won’t we, Carl?’ Though there was a softness in her voice, her sharp blue eyes warned his father there would be hell to pay if he so much as spoke to Tessa without Chase’s permission. His father finally nodded and Chase leaned forward, kissed her forehead and whispered, ”I knew I could count on you, Mom. Thanks.”
He left, glad his parents weren’t going to stick their noses into this. Chase wanted his baby in the worst way. But after spending several sleepless nights with Tessa Lightfoot’s image bursting across his mind, Chase wanted more. He wanted to see if he wasn’t fooling himself about this energy they shared, the way she could stir his senses into madness. He wanted to kiss her, really kiss her. But as he thought of her perfectly lush mouth, a mouth made for old-fashioned slow, wet kisses, Chase figured at this point, she’d just bite him.
Four
In her doctor’s office two days later, Tessa looked up from the magazine and frowned. The hint of a voice, a ma/e voice, pricked her attention and she strained to define it. When the receptionist called her name, she rushed past the partition and froze.
Chase. His shoulder propped against the wall, he was obviously receiving a thorough explanation of the birth process, via a wall diagram, from the pretty blond nurse. Tessa didn’t like that he was here, didn’t like that he’d used that oozing Madison charm to worm his way past the front desk of a women’s clinic, and she did not like the way Blondie was looking at him as if he could cure cancer.
Oh, you’re really keeping those emotions under control, aren’t you? She cleared her throat and something inside her leapt—she swore it was indigestion—when he dismissed the young nurse without a glance and came to her.
“What are you doing here?” she asked the instant he was near.
“I saw the appointment on your calendar when I was at the store on Saturday,” he said absently as he sketched her quickly from head to toe. “God, you look beautiful, Tessa.”
She couldn’t help the flutter in her chest, and unconsciously smoothed her vest and slacks. Then she shook her head, dismissing his compliments and focusing her attention on why he was here. To invade her privacy, her life. To take her baby.
I’m not visiting my child, he’d said. I want him. It terrified her to think just how determined Chase Madison could be.
“Mr. Madison,” finally came through tightly clenched teeth.
Chase sighed dispiritedly. She was upset. Well, he didn’t expect her not to be. But after his great sales job the other day, he’d hoped she’d be just a little glad to see him. Tessa was a hard nut to crack; this wall she built around herself, for his benefit he knew, was like coming up against ice. For a time she thawed, then something triggered the quick freeze job and Chase found himself back at the beginning. But he wasn’t giving up.
“You can’t be here.” She glanced around at the personnel and patients listening.
“I’m the father, Tessa. I have the right.”
“No, you don’t. It’s my body.”
“Your body’s nurturing my baby.”
“Yours?” a feminine voice asked.
They turned and Chase found a statuesque older woman wearing green hospital scrubs. Faraday was stenciled across the pocket.
“Tessa?” She frowned between the two. “Who is this?”
Tessa cast Chase a superior glance and said, “Test tube number 3—4—6 dash whatever,” then ignored him and his narrowing look as she looped her arm with Dr. Johanna Faraday’s, drawing her away and whispering quickly. Dr. Faraday spoke calmly, glancing intermittently at Chase.
“Well, at least he doesn’t have the warts and baldness you wanted.”
“What he has is the ability to charm the socks off your staff, my sister and my employees. He shouldn’t even be here.”
“Calm down, Tessa. And you’re right. An oh/gyn clinic isn’t the usual male stomping grounds, but the test proved he is 346-1010, and that gives him the same rights as any other father. Especially since he didn’t sign them away.”
“No, he didn’t.” She had to admit that. He was a victim of a computer foul-up as much as she was. But that didn’t change the fact that Chase was here, trying to wiggle into her appointment like he was...what? The father? Concerned about her? Hah.
Johanna tapped her pen against her lips, then tucked it behind her ear. “You’ve acknowledged him as the father?”
“As the donor.” She couldn’t think of him as anything else. She just couldn’t. Where Chase and his rights were concerned, she had to keep her emotions out of it.
Johanna looked thoughtful, then sighed with that I’ve-come-to-a-decision look. “He doesn’t have the right to accompany you in the exam, but in all honesty I can’t make him leave. Fathers have rights.” Johanna leaned a touch closer. “Is he going to give you trouble, get violent?”
Tessa cast him a quick glance. Chase? Violent? She didn’t know him well enough to make that judgment. But the man smiled more than a kid at Christmas. “I doubt it.”
Tessa felt as if she were losing control of the situation the minute Johanna Faraday motioned to Chase, then indicated her office. She sent Tessa a behave glance before they disappeared inside. Tessa sat, then Johanna addressed the man standing behind the extra chair.
“I must think of the welfare of my patient first, Mr. Madison, and Miss Lightfoot does not want you here.”
Her patient, Chase noticed, wouldn’t look at him. Instead she twisted the silken cord of her purse into a hangman’s noose. “Miss Lightfoot would rather I vanish off the face of the earth,” he said with a half smile and a glance in her direction. “But I’m not.”
“Why did you come here, Mr. Madison?”
He felt Tessa’s gaze on him, but looked at the doctor. “Because my baby is growing inside her and I have the right to know how well.” He glanced at Tessa.
Something flickered in her eyes, so brief Chase almost didn’t catch it. He wished he knew her well enough to decipher it. “She’s supposed to have a sonogram today. I want to know if everything is okay, with Tessa and my child.”
“For a man who offered no more than a few ounces of fluid, you’re asking for a lot.” Tessa glared up at him, hating that he looked so good, hating that he was being so reasonable. He didn’t give a hoot about her, just this baby and his, however small, part in its creation.
The fractured anger and fear in her words struck him hard, with insight and just enough frustration to want to shake her. “Yes, I didn’t have any part in this, and yes, I wasn’t consulted, but there is more than our feelings and rights at stake now. There is the child. Our child,” he gestured between himself and Tessa and out of the corner of his eye saw her shoulders stiffen. “And whether you like it or not,” he said, turning his gaze to Tessa and meeting her stare, “that infant—” he nodded to her tummy “—needs everyone who cares about him, protecting him and his rights.” God, Chase thought, he loved this baby already. He lowered his voice, speaking to Tessa as if they didn’t have an audience. “Think what you want, Tessa, but I didn’t come here to upset you. After what happened in the Golden Dragon, I realized how unbelievably miraculous this all is.”
Tessa felt a lump work in her throat, at the raw emotion playing across his features, lacing his voice with a tender roughness.
“And I only wanted some of the experiences I’ve already missed.” He held her gaze a moment longer, then looked at Dr. Faraday. “Take good care of her,” he said, then left without a word.
Both women stared at the empty doorway, then at each other.
Tessa’s eyes burned and she felt awful. “Oh hell, now what do I do?”
“He could stand beyond the curtain and listen.”
Tessa stared at her lap. This was so personal. And they hadn’t even really kissed, for heaven’s sake. But the look in his eyes, oh God, she felt as if she were cheating him. She was cheating him. Finally Tessa nodded and Johanna left the office to catch him. Outside the door she heard Johanna laying down the rules. She didn’t even look at him. God, she was being a coward, but every minute with the man had her feeling like a general losing ground in a battle. Still, the excitement in his voice hurt. Only the baby, she reminded herself. He wants this only for the baby.
The sonogram was under way when Tessa heard a nurse escort him in through the hall door. She glanced down and saw his shoes beneath the curtain, but even with Johanna talking louder than usual, he didn’t utter a word, didn’t move.
Then Chase heard the rapid, steady heartbeat. His breath caught in his chest, a violent surge of air that left him stunned. Alive. Alive, his brain shouted. His child. Flesh and bone and blood were growing, breathing in there, waiting to be born. Waiting to be loved and protected. And he rejoiced in the warm feeling racing through his body, pushing his pulse to match his child’s.
Then suddenly the heartbeat stopped.
“What happened?” Panic filled his voice.
Johanna’s was calm. “I just moved to a different area, Mr. Madison, wait. Listen? There it is again. Oh look, Tessa, her fingers.”
Abruptly, Chase whipped the curtain back and stared first at Tessa, her belly so round and smooth and covered with some slimy gel, then beyond her to the monitor. And Chase saw a tiny fist unfurl. His eyes burned and he leaned closer, scanning every detail.
“Do you mind?” Tessa said, but he wasn’t listening. He was awed. There was no other word for it. And Tessa thought right there that things could have been worse. He could have been like Ryan, who hoped never to see this sight. But Chase Madison was looking at her now as if she could spin straw into gold.
Dr. Faraday and she exchanged a glance, Johanna’s gaze dropping to the black-and-white printout. She tore it off and offered it to him. Hesitantly, he accepted it, his eyes searching the undefinable shades of gray for the unborn life hidden within. The doctor peered over the sheet and pointed. And Tessa realized that strong, handsome, ex-Marine, construction engineer Chase Madison was very close to tears. The sight left her stunned. He gazed down at her, then he bent and kissed her, quick and hard on the mouth.
Then he left.
And Tessa, though oddly delighted to see a man brought to his knees by the sight of an unborn child, realized just how much he wanted to be her baby’s father. And exactly how much she didn’t matter.
Tigh McBain raced forward and slammed the ball against the court wall, believing he had his racquetball partner in the clinch. But Chase dived out, sneakers squeaking as he skidded to a halt and smashed the tiny ball to the baseline. Tigh knew he’d never get the return in time and tossed the racquet to the floor.
“I give.” Bent over, breathing heavily, he braced his hands on his thighs before he fell flat on his face.
“You?” Chase tugged the tank top from his shorts and swiped the sweat from his face with the hem.
“Yes, me,” came back tightly. “God, where do you get the energy?”
Chase thought about Tessa and smiled to himself. “I don’t sit behind a desk getting fat.”
Tigh straightened immediately, scowling, and Chase noticed he couldn’t resist touching his stomach. Chase laughed.
“Come on, I’ll buy you one of those energy shakes.”
“I’d rather have a beer.”
“That’s your problem,” Chase told him. “Besides, it’s not even 10 a.m.”
“You can really be a sanctimonious pain sometimes, you know,” Tigh said as they left the court. Chase drained a bottle of water without stopping, then slung his gym bag over his shoulder and headed out to the car. Tigh was a little slower, stopping to flirt with a pretty woman whose only job was to hand out towels. She was helping him use one, Chase decided.
“That’s jailbait,” Chase said as Tigh caught up to him.
“Nah, she’s twenty.”
“And you’re thirty.”
Tigh looked at Chase and frowned, his features going slack as if he had just realized how old he was. He glanced back at the girl, smiled, then faced forward as they walked to the car.