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Miles shook his head. “Let’s get back to this new guy you’re involved with.”
“Used to be involved with,” she corrected. “It fell apart when I caught him cheating.” She gave him a stern frown. “I despise cheaters.”
“Any intelligent, moral person would.”
Mollified, she explained, “He didn’t want it to end and continually made a pest of himself.”
“If he didn’t want it to end, he should have kept it in his pants.”
Maxi snorted. “Yeah, that’s basically what I told him. But while I was trying to deal with that, my mother passed away during a procedure.”
“You said that once before. What type of procedure?”
Lord, she hated explaining it. “Mom was beautiful. She didn’t need cosmetic surgery, but she liked it all the same. Seemed like every six months she was having something else done, always tweaking this and tightening that. She got it in her head that she wanted this extreme makeover, and I guess it was just too much. She died of cardiac arrest under anesthesia.”
“Damn. So unnecessary.”
She nodded. Very unnecessary. “My mom and I weren’t really close, not since...well, since I was eighteen and everything happened.”
A disapproving frown creased his brow. “Was she close with your sister?”
“Yes.”
The frown darkened more. “That has to be tough.”
“Not really. I mean, I’m used to it.”
One fingertip brushed her cheek. “No one gets used to that.”
That rough whisper teased over her senses. “There’s so much you don’t know about me.” Things she needed to confess. “Even though that’s the way I wanted it, at least with you, it wasn’t the norm. Usually I’m an open book.” She hadn’t hidden from her failings. No, like a fool, she flaunted them.
“So flip a few pages for me.”
She smiled with his jest. “I’ll start with family.” He needed to understand the many ways she’d disappointed them. “My sister is a fitness buff. She owns her own boutique gym for trendy people. Very exclusive, and very pricey. Harlow is one of those hard bodies...well, I guess like you.” Maxi turned her head to stare out the window at the kids playing. That made it easier than looking at Miles. “I already told you about my brother. He was one of those ‘top of the class’ guys his whole life. Mom is a dynamo. There was no challenge that seemed too big to her.” And then there was Maxi. A disappointment.
Miles waited, occasionally drifting his fingers over her bare shoulder in a way that felt comforting more than seductive.
“You should probably know,” she finally said, “I’m the odd duck in my family. I love them and they love me, but we don’t really fit together. I’m the underachiever. I was never super motivated about anything.” Except the farmhouse, and that had turned into a living nightmare.
“You had a good job,” Miles said. “That is, if you were really a personal shopper?”
God, it hurt, knowing he didn’t believe anything about her. Not that she blamed him after she’d been deliberately elusive. But now...now she needed him to believe, to trust her as much as she trusted him. “I never lied to you about anything, I promise. I just didn’t share much.”
“Want to tell me why?”
“Gary—my ex—was all about trying to get back with me, especially after my grandma died and he knew I’d had two inheritances. With my dad already gone, everything came to Harlow, Neil and me. But there wasn’t a lot of equity in how it was done and my sister and brother were...are furious with me for financial reasons.”
She could feel Miles staring at her. She knew he had a lot of questions.
Instead of asking any of them, he cupped her shoulder in his big, warm hand and just waited quietly for her to continue.
This was why Miles had scared her so badly. He seemed too blasted perfect. The last two times she’d been drawn to a guy, she’d been horribly wrong. She no longer trusted her own judgment, but she also wasn’t a fool. Being around Miles would mean falling hard and fast. If he turned out to be a creep, then what?
And even if he didn’t, the last thing she needed was another complication in her life. Deep down to her bones, she knew that this was her chance for redemption.
But to accomplish that, she had to be strong.
Of course, she’d never counted on being harassed, terrorized and assaulted.
CHAPTER FOUR
GETTING BACK TO her explanations, Maxi said, “The financial mess happened when my mother mostly cut me out of her will to motivate me.” Her mouth twisted with the memory. “I not only screwed up when it came to men, I often failed at life, too.”
“I don’t believe that.”
“If Mom was alive, she’d explain it all to you, believe me. I was her big disappointment in so many ways. She had Neil and Harlow and they excelled at everything.” She gave a small, deceptive shrug of acceptance. “And then she had me.”
“Everyone is different. It’s not fair to compare.”
Maxi laughed, but she didn’t feel any humor. “Trust me, there was no comparison. Neil and Harlow always strived for perfection. Looking back, I think I strived to be contrary.”
“Well,” he murmured, “I can confirm the contrary part. But that’s not always bad.”
“I was a screwup and I know it.” She couldn’t deny it. “Wrong boyfriend, wrong attitude, wrong focus. I had mediocre grades and didn’t care. I blew off college. Took an apartment in a terrible part of town. It drove Mom nuts. She decided the best way to make an impact on me was to leave all her business interests evenly divided between my brother and sister. She didn’t cut me out entirely, though. She left me an old patch of rental property that wasn’t worth much.”
In a carefully neutral tone, Miles said, “That sounds more like punishment than positive motivation.”
She shrugged. “I figured it was a small price to pay for how I’d disappointed her. But it all backfired anyway.” Guilt always tightened her throat whenever she thought of her mother’s thwarted plans. “For as long as I can remember, Mom always bought property. She got started with the rental property she gave to me, but throughout my lifetime, she grew her holdings until she could purchase a posh resort. It was her pride and joy, and by all appearances, it was a thriving, lucrative business.”
After a brief pause, Miles said, “By all appearances?”
Maxi still couldn’t believe that her mother had kept the business problems private. From her, sure. She and her mother didn’t talk business. Often they didn’t talk about anything.
But not confiding in Harlow and Neil? Incredible.
“After Mom passed, Harlow discovered that she’d filed bankruptcy. That’s bad enough, but from what I understand, she’d also transferred assets through a shell company to Harlow and Neil, which makes it look like she was trying to defraud her creditors.” Honestly, none of them could be sure she wasn’t. “Now, as the recipients of the transfers, they’re being sued. Heaven only knows when it’ll all get settled.”
Miles whistled. “Wow. Can’t say I understand all that either, but it sounds pretty nasty.”
“Very.” Because it was so ironic, Maxi laughed uneasily. “The property Mom left me? Turns out it was smack-dab in the middle of a big land deal. I made a killing off it.”
Eyes flaring, Miles said, “Holy shit. I bet your brother and sister aren’t happy about that.”
“They’d have been fine if it had gone the way originally intended. But for them to be on the short end? They’re livid. And then, of course, it wasn’t long after that my grandmother passed away, too. I was heartsick when Harlow and Neil jumped me at the funeral, demanding I do the right thing, which to them means selling the house and giving the profit to them.”
“Bad timing,” Miles muttered.
“Very bad. I was already hurt and angry, more so after Harlow claimed I could never take care of the farm, that I was in over my head. Neil agreed with her. They wanted me to be happy with a chunk of money and forget my grandmother’s wishes.”
“To care for her cats?”
She nodded. “I didn’t react well. I offered them each twenty grand to leave me alone, which admittedly won’t go far.”
“Sounds generous to me.”
At the time, it had sounded generous to her, too. But she hadn’t realized the financial tangle her mother had left behind. “They didn’t think so. Neither of them has been to the house, but I get plenty of texts and emails reminding me of my duty, and what I should do for them.”
“What about your duty to your grandmother?”
“Neil says they’re just a bunch of feral cats and don’t really matter, not when compared to my mother’s reputation.” She pressed a hand to her heart. “But they mattered to my grandma. You’ve seen the farm. She put her whole focus on those cats. They were her pets, her purpose. I can’t just ignore that.” One way or another, she was determined to finally do something right.
Miles pondered that for a moment. “Has it occurred to you that it might be your brother or sister causing the problems? If they want you to sell, what better way to convince you than to terrorize you into it? Money,” he added, “can be a powerful motivator.”
“No, they wouldn’t do that. Like I said, deep down they love me.” Sometimes she had to look really deep, but she knew the love was there.
Sympathy crept into his expression and tone. “That could explain why, after you were drugged, you were only moved outside and not actually hurt.”
Her throat tightened at the possibility, and she adamantly shook her head. “They wouldn’t scare me like that. This is just one of many battles that we’ve fought over the years.” They butted heads, her family got more fed up with her and she worked harder to hide her hurt. But they would never go this far.
Clearly unconvinced, Miles said, “All right. You know them and I don’t. Just keep it in mind, okay?”
Keep in mind that her own family would... No, she couldn’t believe it. To appease Miles, she said, “Sure. I’ll add it to my growing list of disturbing things to think about.”
With regret, he whispered, “I’m sorry you’re going through all this.”
“On the upside, I’ve been too busy juggling problems to wallow in grief.” She tried for a smile, but it eluded her.
“Grieving is important.” Miles slid his hand down her arm until he could twine his fingers with hers. “Maybe while I’m helping out, you could slow down and take the time to feel.”
Oh, she felt plenty around Miles. Too much. “We’ll see how it goes.” So far, she hadn’t wanted to think too much, not about losing her mom, not about losing her grandma and not about having her life turned upside down.
His thumb brushed over her knuckles. “So now I know everything you have on your plate. Want to tell me what it has to do with avoiding me?”
Even that simple touch from him did crazy things to her insides. Dropping her head back and closing her eyes, Maxi blew out a breath. “That first night I came to the bar...I just wanted to be me, you know? The person I was before I inherited a chunk of money and a farmhouse that needs a ton of work. I didn’t want to think about lost opportunities with my mother, or the new tension with my sister and brother. I didn’t want to dwell on how I’d once again completely misjudged a man. I wanted to escape for a while.”
“With a one-night stand?”
She opened her eyes to look at him. “That was the original plan, yes.”
“I wasn’t judging,” he promised, picking up on her sudden antagonism. “Just trying to get a handle on things.”
“Well...good.” She’d been judged enough lately.
His mouth quirked in that crooked grin she loved so much. “I was the beneficiary of your ‘escape.’ There’s nothing about it that I regret.”
He sounded so sincere, her hope rose. Twisting to face him, still very relaxed with her head resting back, Maxi whispered, “You mean that?”
“Yeah, I do.” He squeezed her hand, then withdrew. “The only thing I regret is how it ended.”
It kept coming back to that—not that she could blame him. “It didn’t exactly work out the way I’d planned either.”
“No?”
“I only wanted something for me, you know? My life was upside down, and I had so much to deal with, so many emotions pulling me in a dozen different directions. I wanted pure, hot sex—then I wanted to walk away with no strings attached. I had too many strings already.” And too many failures.
“I trust you got the hot sex?”
She grinned hugely. “Boy, that’s an understatement. You totally rocked my world.”
Her words brought a heated look to his eyes that almost singed her.
Softer now, she admitted, “I’d expected to have sex with a total stranger, and that’d be that. It was going to be my wicked splurge, my departure from reality.” As she searched his green-eyed gaze, her voice thickened. “Instead, I came back looking for you again.”
With satisfaction, he whispered, “And then a third time.”
“I knew if I let myself, I’d start a thing with you. But after striking out twice, it seemed really dumb to chance it, especially when I just plain didn’t have time or energy for it.”
“By thing, you mean a relationship?”
She nodded. After that third time, she’d felt not only physically hooked, but emotionally and romantically, too. That was dangerous.
“You’re assuming that’s what I wanted?”
“I wasn’t at all sure what you wanted. That last time, you were...well, I don’t want to say moody.”
Brows flattening, he groused, “Yeah, please don’t.”
His look of affront amused her. “You asked me so many questions, and you shared more of yourself, telling me that you might leave MMA and go into the bodyguard biz. The sex was just as phenomenal, but I was afraid we were getting too chatty.”
“And getting chatty spooked you?” Miles shook his head. “Aw, babe, you’re nuts, you know that, right?”
“Maybe.” Her family certainly thought so. “But for once, I thought I should be responsible and get my life in order. You saw the farmhouse. It was ten times worse when I first moved in. I’ve accomplished a lot in the time I’ve been there. I might’ve gotten more done if there weren’t so many strange things happening.” Her gaze moved over him. “Now I’m thankful you did tell me about your plans. Otherwise I’m not sure where I would’ve turned for help.”
“You could have come to me either way.”
Probably true. After all, as a professional fighter, Miles had the physical skills to handle most types of trouble. It continued to make her uncomfortable, knowing her departure from his life had angered him, so she did a topic switch. “I’m curious. You told me you were leaving MMA, but not why.”
“I had my reasons.”
She’d researched him online and knew he’d been a force to be reckoned with, a skilled fighter with a string of wins behind his name, respected by others in the industry, adored by rabid fans. Why would he have left all that?
When he said nothing else, she asked, “The reasons are a secret?”
His enigmatic gaze cut her way. “They have no bearing on me being your bodyguard.”
“Whoa,” she said, holding up her hands as if in surrender. “I didn’t know it was a touchy subject. This is me backing off.”
“And that,” Miles said, “is our cue to get moving if we want to have time left to get everything done.”
But...she’d been leading up to something there...something like an invite to share her bed again!
Soon as they’d started talking about it, she’d recalled all the ways he’d touched her, tasted her, the positions he’d favored, how frantic he’d made her feel—and then how fulfilled.
Blast him, he had her craving him all over again.
Who was she kidding? Soon as she’d laid eyes on him at the Body Armor agency, she’d suffered an explosion of need. Not just sexual, but all those special things Miles made her feel.
Sighing in very real frustration, Maxi gave up her slouched posture and handed him the bag with all their empty containers together. He left the vehicle to throw it away in a curbside trash can, then returned and started the engine.
“Is your new apartment anywhere near the agency?” she asked as she fastened her seat belt.
“Yeah, why?”
“I want to get my car.” When they’d left, Miles had been adamant that she not drive, never mind that she’d gotten there on her own. Given the fuzziness of her memory, she hadn’t argued too much. Since they’d be nearby again, it only made sense for her to drive it back.
“Leese and Justice will swing by tomorrow and get it before they come out.”
“They don’t have the keys.”
“They can get them from the office.”
She narrowed her eyes on him. “When you took them from me, I thought you put them in your pocket.”
“I left them with Sahara.”
Well, that was high-handed of him. “Don’t ever do that again.”
He pulled away from the curb, asking, “Do what?” as if he weren’t the least bit concerned.
“Make a decision for me.” Even though she knew it was mostly sexual frustration making her snippy, Maxi said, “Deliberately mislead me.”
His brows shot up and he spared her an incredulous glance before getting his attention back on the road. “That’s the pot calling the kettle black.”
The accusatory tone only irked her more. “The pot is paying the kettle’s salary!”
He snorted. “Do you really think you were in any shape to make decisions this morning?”
“No, but you could have just said that you wanted someone else to bring my car to me.”
He rolled one big shoulder. “At the time, I didn’t even know if Leese would be free. Since he is, it works out.”
Maxi closed her mouth before she made an even bigger fool of herself. She’d blame the overreaction on the strain, but she knew that wasn’t it.
She wanted Miles, and so far, he wasn’t all that receptive to the idea.
Giving up for the moment, she noted the size of the security store where he pulled up and parked. “This place is immense.”
“They’re top-of-the-line and should have everything we need.” After he stepped out, he walked around to open her door.
Always the gentleman. Maxi left the SUV but didn’t go far. She put a hand on his chest—and even that, such a small touch, did crazy things to her. There was no give to his rock-hard body; how could she not react?
Reining in her haywire hormones, she said, “Promise me, Miles. I’m not an idiot. You don’t have to do things for my own good. Just tell me the plan, and I can be reasonable.”
He looked first at her hand on him, then into her eyes. He was so close, she breathed in the scents of soap and warm male skin.
A sultry expression narrowed his gaze. Voice low and rough, almost hypnotic, he said, “Since I don’t know you well enough to make that judgment, I can only promise to try.”
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