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“Can you blame him?” Adam asked. He rose and moved closer to her, leaning one hip against her desk and crossing his legs at the ankles.
It was a totally masculine pose and should have put her at ease, but didn’t. There was something measured, calculated in the way he stood there, waiting for her reaction.
She sighed, wondering if he somehow blamed her for the downward spiral of the Vernon-Dawn-Malcolm mess. God knew that she blamed herself for not paying better attention to Dawn and Vernon, but to be honest they’d been two of her best teachers.
“No, I don’t. That kind of betrayal would cut so deep. I wish I’d been more observant and realized what was going on.”
“What would you have done?” he asked.
“I don’t know. Something. Anything to prevent the situation from getting out of hand.”
“You can’t control the actions of others,” he said. There was an emotion in his words that she struggled to define.
“I know. Just think how nice it would be if I could. We wouldn’t have to go to lunch to discuss the school, you’d just agree to keep it open.”
“Let’s go.”
She followed him out of her office, trying not to wonder what it would feel like to have his lips on her skin.
He put his hand on the small of her back again. She liked the feeling of his big hand on her. She stumbled a little and he steadied her with his other hand.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes,” she said, but inside she wasn’t okay. She’d been so careful for her entire life. Made sure to keep her private fantasies carefully tucked away from the reality of the life she carved out for herself.
For the first time she understood that the lines between them were blurry. That they could be crossed. And she wasn’t prepared to deal with that.
When would she be? She’d spent the twenty years since she’d turned thirteen running from her body and the way men reacted to it. When was she going to stop running?
The bell rang while they were in the hallway and she drew Adam to a stop. She wanted him to see the camaraderie between the students. She wanted him to have a glimpse of what he’d be taking from the kids if he didn’t vote to let her try to save the school. She wanted him to see that there was something worth saving here.
And nothing could serve as a stronger reminder of what she stood to lose if she let herself contemplate stepping out of the shadows she’d carefully built around herself.
Adam looked down at her as if he wasn’t sure what to do with her, and she understood that. She didn’t know what to do with herself. She only knew that the life she’d been living wasn’t acceptable anymore. It was going to change, because of the situation at the school and because of this man. And if he was interested in her, the way he seemed to be, then she wasn’t going to retreat and let this moment pass her by.
Adam had his driver take them to a local chain restaurant and soon was seated across from Grace in a booth.
Something had changed in her demeanor since they’d left her office, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. She was starting to relax around him. She still had a barrier in place around her, a formality that she didn’t drop, but he could tell she was trying to be friendlier.
“What should I do differently to win over the board members?” she asked after taking a delicate sip of her water.
“Nothing. Most of them are tired of the problems that the school has,” he said bluntly.
“Well that was honest.” She entwined her long fingers together on the table. He wanted to reach out and touch her, rub his thumb over her knuckles. But he didn’t.
“I’m not going to get a chance if Malcolm has anything to say about it.”
“You’re right about that. But I can override the board’s decision or possibly table the formal vote until the end of the school year.
“Your plan has a lot of merit on its own. The board of regents will only be swayed by action and results. I’ll be happy to help you implement the changes personally. I think that will be enough to convince the board to give you some extra time.”
She flushed as she stared at him. He wanted to know more about what made her tick. Why hadn’t he paid attention to Grace before now? “You’d do that?”
She made him feel like a better man than he really was. Maybe it was the knowledge that he was only sitting across from her because she’d aroused his interest with her fictional story about being his mistress. There was something in her eyes that made him feel … well, not empty the way he usually did.
“I don’t say things I don’t mean.”
“I’d heard that about you,” she said. “That you don’t tolerate lies.”
“That’s right. I don’t,” he said, not willing to talk about why. “What else have you heard?”
Not all of the stories that circulated about him were nice. In business, he was ruthless.
“That’s all,” she said, smiling at him.
He caught his breath as her entire visage changed. Grace Stephens was a stunning beauty when she smiled. A goodness shone through in that smile.
“What have you heard about me?” she asked, her voice suddenly shy.
Not much really. Commendations from parents and students prior to the incident but nothing personal about her. “I’ve heard very little about the woman behind the headmistress role, but I’d say that you are a woman of hidden depths and passions and that one day some lucky man is going to unlock those secrets.”
She tipped her head to the side. “I’m getting a glimpse of that charm of yours.”
He was a bit offended that she thought so little of his compliment. “I’m not flirting with you, Grace. Don’t belittle the both of us by asking for honesty and then reacting as if it were a lie.”
She flushed. “I’m sorry. Anything too close to the truth unsettles me.”
“Why?”
She shrugged and looked away from him.
“Look at me, Grace.”
She lifted her head, her gaze meeting his squarely. A tendril of her hair had escaped the barrette she’d used to clip it at the back of her neck.
“Why?” he asked again.
“Because I’m afraid of that kind of truth, Adam. I’m not sure how to act around you. You’ve never looked at me this way before.”
“I’m looking now,” he said.
“Yes, you are, and I’m not sure why.”
He knew that he should come clean and tell her he’d found her erotic story, but his gut said she’d shut him out and he’d never see this Grace Stephens again. Instead he captured her hand, tracing his finger over her fragile wrist and the veins running under her pale skin.
“Does there have to be a reason?”
“I guess not. But I’m sure there is one.”
“You’re passionate about your students and your school, Grace. There’s something different about you when you’re defending them, fighting for them.”
She licked her lips and he tracked the movement, realizing she didn’t wear lipstick. Her mouth was lush, her top lip bow-shaped and the lower one fuller. He wanted to draw her across the table and taste her. To see how she’d react to a kiss. How long would it take to shatter her composure?
“I just know how hard it can be to lose your school at that age. To have to move to a new place.”
“Personal experience?”
“Yes.”
“I had the feeling that you were practically rooted to Texas.”
“I am. I’ve always wanted to find a place where I fit in and put down roots and I found that at Tremmel-Bowen.”
“You didn’t grow up in Plano?” he asked, realizing how little he knew about her. It made him feel a little ashamed that they’d known each other for more than three years and he’d never paid any attention to her before this moment.
“No. I didn’t.”
There was a quiet note in her voice that made him realize there was more to her past than she’d probably want to tell him. “Where’d you grow up?”
“West Texas.”
“What city?”
“Why does this matter? I’d rather discuss the school—”
“I give you my word that I’ll step in and delay the vote. There’s nothing left to discuss about the prep school. I’d rather talk about you,” he said.
“Is that the only reason you’re willing to help me convince the board to keep the school open? A personal interest in me?”
He was a smart man and knew there wasn’t a good answer to this question. But he realized he’d pushed too hard and too personally for her. “No, of course not.”
Grace didn’t want to talk about herself. Men rarely wanted to know about her. She had no idea what she’d say. She stunk at making small talk and if they weren’t going to talk about the school then she was going to have to be sparkling or interesting and, frankly, she didn’t think she had that in her.
Luckily their food arrived and she gave it more attention than it deserved. She closed her eyes and offered a brief prayer of thanks for the food. Some of the preacher’s teachings she’d never been able to shed.
Okay, none of his teachings, but she didn’t like to dwell on the fact that her father was still controlling her behavior years after she’d left him behind.
She tried not to be nervous as their lunch progressed and Adam coaxed the conversation through a lot of different topics. She was surprised by how much he revealed about himself. He didn’t seem to have the barriers she always kept in place between herself and everyone else.
She felt a twinge of embarrassment at how professionally he was now behaving toward her. Had she completely misread his interest earlier?
She tucked a strand of hair back toward her clip while the waitress cleared their plates and Adam reached over to capture her hand in his.
“Isn’t this cozy?” Sue-Ellen Hanshaw asked as she approached their table.
Grace jerked her hand from Adam’s and tried to remind herself that they weren’t doing anything untoward. “Adam was giving me some input into the presentation I made earlier.”
“I’m sure he was.”
“Can we help you with something?” Adam asked.
“I hope you can help get our school back on track,” she said. “My son has a year and half left at Tremmel-Bowen and I’d hate to have to pull him out before he can graduate.”
“We all want to avoid that situation,” Grace said. “I’d love to talk to you and get your input.”
“Adam, will you be helping Grace?”
“Not that Grace needs my help, but yes, I’m going to be an active part of the school community until the end of the year.”
“I’ll be happy to serve on a committee with both of you.”
Grace had absolutely no idea how this had happened. She didn’t work well in groups. There was no way she wanted both Adam and Sue-Ellen in her office on a regular basis.
“We can work out the details of our committee after the board meets this afternoon,” Adam replied.
“I’ll look forward to it,” Sue-Ellen said and walked away.
Grace glared after her, hating the fact that Sue-Ellen had bullied her way onto a committee that Grace wasn’t even sure she wanted to be a part of. If she was on a committee with Sue-Ellen, she’d have a hard time holding her tongue and being the nice little headmistress she was supposed to be. Of all the parents she dealt with, Sue-Ellen was the one who pushed her buttons.
Sue-Ellen glanced back over her shoulder with a smug half-smile. Grace had the feeling Sue-Ellen knew exactly what she did to her.
“Will you do something for me?” Adam asked.
“In return for your help at the school?” She didn’t want to say no since he was doing her a huge favor but she’d learned a long time ago not to agree to something without hearing all the details first.
“No. I’m going to help you without you being in my debt.”
He seemed a little offended that she’d thought she’d have to pay him for being nice to her. But he was a savvy businessman, and she knew he didn’t just donate his time to help anyone out. Even the school that was his family’s legacy.
“Then why?”
“Curiosity,” he said.
“What do you want me to do?” she asked after a few seconds.
“Have dinner with me,” he said.
Dinner with Adam Bowen … oh, my God. She wanted to say yes. She wanted to run and hide at the same time. Her resolution to change herself and not wait for her life to change around her was still so new that she had a moment’s thought that she’d just forget about it and sink back into her old life. After all, it was Monday night and she didn’t have TiVo. She’d miss her favorite television show.
This was it, she thought, glancing up at him.
“You’re staring at me,” he said.
She blinked and realized she had been. Just looking at that perfectly formed mouth. Wondering for the millionth time what it would feel like pressed to hers. “Am I?”
He quirked one eyebrow at her. She fought to keep her expression serene. To somehow keep him from guessing that he had any effect on her. But she knew that he was used to being around much more sophisticated women and a small-town girl from west Texas was going to be no match for him.
“Yes, you are,” he said.
“You’re a very attractive man.”
“I can’t believe you’re just noticing,” he said.
Startled she had to laugh. “You aren’t going to deny it?”
“Women seem to find the arrangement of my features pleasing.”
She shook her head. An innate charm imbued everything he did and said. She wondered if it stemmed from his childhood. She knew he was the pampered son of older parents. And her own childhood had been very different. Was that the key to adult success?
“I wish I had your confidence,” she said before she could stop the words. She’d gone to school this morning knowing she was going to have to fight to keep her career going, never imagining that she’d find herself in a different relationship with a man she’d fantasized about for a long time.
“Have dinner with me and I’ll teach you how to get it.”
She nodded, unable to say more. This was a fantasy come true. So why did she feel as if she were about to start something more potentially scandalous than the mess she was already in?
Three
Grace needed more of Adam. She wanted more. Her heart beat so swiftly and loudly she was sure he could hear it. She scraped her fingernails lightly down his upper body. He groaned, the sound rumbling up from his chest. He leaned back, bracing himself on his elbows. And let her explore. This was different than the hurried couplings she’d had with boyfriends in the past. Encounters that had happened in the dark and were over almost before they’d begun. “Last chance to stop before we go too far, Grace.”
Excerpt from “Adam’s Mistress” by Stephanie Grace
Adam paid the check and escorted Grace out of the restaurant. He wasn’t sure what had happened in there. Seduction for him was a well-thought-out game and caressing her in the middle of a restaurant had not been his intent.
He put his hand on the small of her back seemingly for the courtesy the gesture afforded, but he acknowledged to himself that he wanted to touch her. He wanted to pull her into his arms and feel her curves nestled against him.
He wanted to kiss her, He wanted to take all the time he wanted to explore her. To figure out the mysterious depths that he sensed were hidden inside her.
He didn’t want to go back to the school and drop her off. He didn’t want to spend the afternoon in meetings with Malcolm, who was out for revenge and wanted to close the school and then sell it. He didn’t want … to leave her.
He liked the quietness she brought to him. The way she really listened when he talked. And the shyness that he had been able to coax her into forgetting while they’d been eating. He also liked her honesty. She wasn’t pretending to be someone else or hiding from the mess the school was in.
Lies were something he simply couldn’t tolerate, even well-meaning ones, and with Grace he got the impression that she was as honest as the day was long. Though she didn’t see herself the same way he did.
He loved her hair and wanted to see it falling around her shoulders instead of clasped at the back of her neck. He seated her in his car, a black Ferrari 599 GTB Fiorano, and walked around to the driver’s side.
She fussed with her hair as he started the car.
“What are you doing?”
She glanced over at him, her head tipped to one side. But her hands stayed at the back of her neck. “My hair is a little wild and not very professional.”
He could think of no woman who embodied professionalism more than Grace. He captured her wrist and pulled her hands free of her hair. The thick brown length of it spilled around her shoulders. She watched him with wide eyes, clearly waiting to see what he’d do next.
“It’s not the hair that makes you professional.” She had no idea how upstanding she seemed. He’d never even glanced past the surface of who she was until he’d seen her secret fantasies written on the page. To be honest, a big part of the reason was that she gave the impression of being a no-nonsense, by-the-book administrator.
“Easily said by a man. You have no idea what it’s like to be in a room full of perfectly coiffed, straight-haired women and be the only one with this hair,” she said, gesturing to her head.
“Does putting it up make you more confident?” he asked. There was a sparkle in her eyes that he thought might be temper. But he knew she wouldn’t lose it with him. He was coming to know Grace better than he suspected she wanted him to. The fact of the matter was, Grace needed him to help save her school so she wouldn’t tell him off no matter how much he ticked her off.
She shrugged, and he knew that he’d stumbled onto something more than a hairstyle choice. She glanced out the window as he turned on the car. He didn’t put the car in gear, only turned on the air conditioning so they didn’t roast while they continued the conversation.
Which, it seemed, had stalled. She wasn’t going to say anything else and probably expected him to behave in a polite, gentlemanly fashion and let the subject drop. But this woman had written about him in a way that no other woman ever had. On page, she’d made him seem to be a hero. And Adam Bowen had never been anyone’s hero.
“Grace …” he said, softly, reaching over to stroke her face. Her skin was the softest he’d ever touched.
She flinched away from him. “Don’t, Adam. We can’t.”
She was right. With the intense public scrutiny of the school, the last thing he should be thinking about was Grace and himself alone. But his mind was consumed with images of the two of them.
He was careful to keep a barrier between himself and other people because he knew he’d always move on. Moving on was the way he survived, something he’d learned the hard way after the death of his parents. He remembered standing in the foyer of that big empty house that had always been filled with their presence and realizing he was all alone. Their deaths when his father’s twin-engine Cessna crashed had rocked his world.
But even then he hadn’t realized how truly alone he was.
She touched his hand, rubbing her finger over the back of his knuckles and making him realize how soft and small she was compared to him.
“It’s not like we even know each other,” she said.
“I want to change that. After all, you oversee one of my investment properties.”
“Investment property? I thought the school was your family’s legacy.”
“It’s a Bowen legacy, but I view it more from a financial angle,” he said in a way that didn’t invite more questions.
“And if I don’t pull it out of trouble, you’re going to lose money—that’s your main concern?”
He took her chin in his hand, moving her head up so that their eyes met. He waited a full minute before saying anything to her. Making sure she realized that he was not just using practiced lines to charm her.
“No, Grace. Because you are the kind of woman who makes a man realize there’s more to life than investments.”
“I am not. Why would you think that?”
“The passion you have for Tremmel-Bowen.”
“I’ve always had it, and you’ve never noticed me before today.”
She had a point, but he wasn’t going to mention the story he’d read … “Adam’s Mistress.” He wanted her to reveal it to him. “It’s the way you defended the school and the students.”
She took his wrist in both of her hands and tried to move his hand from her face. He let her push him away, his fingers caressing her skin as he dropped his hand to his lap.
When he reached for her again, to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, she shifted in the seat and gave him a hard stare.
“I’m warning you.”
“Warning me?”
“Yes. This kind of behavior and comments like you just made—that’s what I was talking about. Do you think I’ve never glanced in a mirror and seen myself? I know exactly the type of woman you usually have on your arm.”
“I don’t have a type,” he said. He really didn’t. He liked all women no matter what their shape or style. He liked that their bodies were different than his. The feminine grace they used when they moved. The way they really got to the heart of the matter. Just as Grace was doing now, though it was making him uncomfortable. Hell, he thought, he even liked that with Grace. Liked the way she didn’t pretend that this was something casual.
“Yeah, right,” she said. “I think it’s time we returned to the school.”
He wondered if she’d sound so sure if she knew the thoughts that prim, school-headmistress tone gave him. He wanted to argue with her, get her to admit he didn’t have a type. But there would be time for that later. Tonight.
The problems she’d left behind when she’d gone to lunch with Adam waited for her when she returned. Sue-Ellen had set up an appointment for the next morning. She was gathering the PTA troops and would be bringing other parents who wanted to take an active part in reshaping the school.
Grace had the beginnings of a headache, no doubt brought on by the pressure of trying to convince the board not to close the school. But she thought the intensity that Adam had shown her was also a part of it. She’d wanted him for a long time and now it seemed he was finally noticing her as a woman.
Why?
She sighed and searched around for the budget file that Jose had made notes on.
“Bruce, have you seen my budget file?” she called out the door.
“I put it on the corner of your desk before we left for the meeting,” her assistant replied.
Grace went back to her desk and picked up a pile of folders, suddenly remembering that she’d put a story she’d meant to enter in a romance writing contest in a similar folder.
Oh, my God.
Frantic, she started searching through all the folders, not finding the budget report or her story “Adam’s Mistress.”
Oh, this was so not good. She had absolutely no excuse to have printed the document out here at work, but her printer at home was almost eight years old and it was difficult to find printer ink for it. Currently, she was out.
There was a knock on the door and she glanced up. Jose stood there with a folder in his hand. A folder that was identical to … well, every other folder in her office, since they purchased folders in bulk.
Calm down, Grace.
“Got a minute?”
“Sure,” she said, amazed that her voice sounded so calm and serene when inside she was ready to scream.
“I grabbed the budget report to double-check over lunch. I think we need to reevaluate the funds we have.”
She was partially relieved that Jose was holding the budget and not her story. “Please tell me we have more money than we thought.”
“I wish I could.”
She sank down in her chair and gestured for Jose to come farther into the room. “I think we’re going to need fifty thousand to make it until the end of the school year.”
“That’s a lot of car washes,” she said. The school had never held many fundraisers. They had a golf tournament every year in the fall to raise funds. But parents and alumni had already contributed to that.