Christmas 2011 Trio A

Sixteen

The caterer’s staff delivered dinner and skillfully set the dining room table in his condo, adding candles and flowers to create a romantic mood. Before they left, Roy paid them handsomely and inspected their work, admiring the small touches.

He’d been looking forward to this evening with Julie all day. He’d longed to kiss her the night before and hadn’t. He berated himself for the missed opportunity. He’d sensed the disappointment in her and felt it himself.

He hadn’t experienced these primal emotions, these deep erotic urges, in years. They were a distant memory now. But with Julie …

The table was covered with an off-white linen cloth that had elegant gold edging. It wouldn’t have been his choice, but the caterer had brought it with her. A large candle inside a glass hurricane lamp, surrounded by poinsettias and sprigs of holly, adorned the center of the table. Again, that had been part of the dinner package. When he’d explained his requirements to Ms. Johnson and the caterer’s staff, he’d been assured that they’d be able to create the mood he desired. His trust had been well-placed; his home had never looked better.

Everything about the condo spoke of romance. The lights were dimmed and lit candles were arranged in strategic spots around the room. In the background, Christmas carols played softly. The stage was set. Roy, dressed in dark slacks and a gray cashmere sweater, checked his watch. Julie was due any minute.

While he waited, he poured himself a glass of chardonnay. To his surprise, he was nervous. He couldn’t imagine why—or could he? His mind flitted from the past to the present and back again. The past was painful and the present was unpredictable … and the future? Well, who knew about the future?

Initially this relationship hadn’t been too promising, but it had gained momentum in the last few days. Even now he wasn’t entirely convinced that Julie was for real, that the settlement offer truly didn’t interest her.

Gradually Roy could feel himself being drawn toward her, almost against his will. He’d decided never to fall in love again, but Julie Wilcoff made him crave the experience of love, the sensations and the feelings and the hope. This sense of wanting to be part of life again frightened him; so did the eagerness that surged through him at the prospect. Love eventually brought pain and betrayal. Yet all day he’d thought of little else but this dinner with Julie and the kisses they were bound to share.

His phone rang and he reached for the receiver, already knowing it was her. “Hello.”

“I’m here.” Even the sound of her voice was sultry.

He hit the numbers that automatically opened the electronic gates to grant her entrance. He couldn’t resist taking his private elevator to the lobby so he could escort her up to his suite.

Standing by the glass doors that opened into the beautifully decorated lobby, Roy watched as Julie walked from her car to the building. Her head was bent against the cold. She had on a long wool coat, which she’d left unbuttoned. Beneath it, he saw the sleek black skirt and matching jacket with a silky white blouse. He was struck by her loveliness. Every time he saw her, she seemed to look more beautiful. Was that just a matter of perception or was he finally seeing what had always been there?

He held the door and stepped back to let her enter. Once she was inside, he made a leisurely appraisal and sucked in his breath. He could think of only one word. “Wow!”

“You like?” Holding open her coat, she slowly pivoted to give him a better look.

“I like a lot.”

“Don’t act so surprised,” she muttered. “I clean up good.”

“I’ll say.” With his hand at her elbow, he steered her toward the elevator, which took them directly to the suite, the doors opening into his living room, with the large picture windows that overlooked Lake Washington. He’d grown accustomed to the spectacular sight and it no longer astonished him as it once had. But the view captured Julie’s attention the instant she stepped out of the elevator. An uninterrupted panorama of Lake Washington and the sparkling Seattle lights stretched before her like some kind of Christmas fantasy.

“Oh, Roy,” she whispered, “this takes my breath away.”

“It’s what sold me on the place.” To his chagrin, she remained rooted to the spot. Seemingly without her noticing, he took off her coat, one sleeve at a time, and hung it in the hall closet. When he returned, she still hadn’t moved.

“The parade of ships is supposed to start in less than thirty minutes.”

She walked close to the window and, standing next to her, Roy pointed out some of the sights. “Naturally, the view is even more spectacular in daylight,” he said.

“I can hardly imagine anything more beautiful than this.” She hadn’t even glanced around his condo, but Roy didn’t care. Although it was a showpiece, he rarely had anyone up to visit. He’d heard that people were curious about his home, but Julie was obviously more intrigued by the view.

Without asking, Roy poured her a glass of wine. Joining her once again, he handed it to her. “Shall we have a drink before we eat?”

“Thank you.” She accepted the glass, then turned back to stare out the window. “I can’t bear to look away. This is just so beautiful.”

He’d thought he’d wait to kiss her, but realized that delaying it another moment was beyond him. Taking the wineglass from her hand, placing it on the wide windowsill, he gently turned her toward him. “What you need is a distraction.”

He didn’t know a woman of thirty could blush, but blush she did. For long seconds her eyes searched his, telling him she wanted his kiss.

Bringing her into his arms, he watched as her eyes drifted closed and she leaned into his embrace. Then they were kissing with the familiarity and ease of longtime lovers. Roy felt a small tremor go through her, or perhaps he was the one who trembled; he no longer knew. What he did know was how good it felt to hold her.

She was taller than any other woman he’d kissed, broader through the shoulders, too, but he liked that. In fact, he liked everything about Julie. He immediately wanted to kiss her again. She opened to him a little more, parting her lips, as her arms slid upward and around his neck.

A voice in his mind started shouting that kissing her was too wonderful to continue without consequences. He hadn’t intended to let things go this far, this fast, but there was no stopping either of them. Not yet. A few more kisses and then he’d pull away and they could go back to enjoying their wine.

Another kiss. Then he’d stop. Then he’d pause long enough to clear his head.

But already his hands, which had been innocently stroking her back, had worked their way down her waist. He loved the feel of her, loved the gentle contours of her utterly feminine body. As their kissing went on, it was hard to keep from touching more and more of her.

It’d been a long time since anything had felt so good.

“Nice,” he whispered, reluctantly easing his mouth from hers. He could barely think, barely focus on anything but the woman in his arms.

“Very nice,” she whispered.

Their eyes held. Her hands remained on his shoulders and his stayed on her waist. “Are you ready for dinner?”

She gave him the softest smile. “No.” Her voice was a mere wisp of sound.

“Me, neither.” He kissed her again, his mouth coaxing hers. Her lips were pliant, warm, moist. He didn’t know how long they went on like that, lost in each other.

“Julie, listen …” Even to his own ears his voice was hoarse. He braced his forehead against hers.

“I’m listening.”

“We’re getting a little hot and heavy here.”

“Yes … I’d noticed.” She kissed the side of his neck and shivers raced down his spine.

“You don’t have to be so agreeable.”

He splayed his fingers through her hair, thinking that would bring her to her senses. In his experience, women didn’t want their hair disheveled. Julie hardly seemed aware of it. He should have known….

He purposely pulled away, thinking that too much of a good thing would soon bore him. But he wasn’t bored. In this, as in everything else, Julie had the opposite effect on him.

“We should have dinner now.” With a superhuman effort he dropped his arms and took a step back. Julie reached for her wineglass and Roy saw that her hands trembled.

He spent a few moments regaining his composure in the kitchen. Dinner, a chicken dish—he couldn’t remember what the caterer had called it—was warming in the oven. The salad sat on the top shelf of the refrigerator. Roy opened the door and stood directly in the blast of cold air with his eyes closed, hoping it would shock him into reality.

“It looks like the parade’s about to start,” Julie called from the other room.

Roy grinned. She was at the window again. “I’ll be a couple of minutes.”

“Don’t rush on my account.”

The meal now seemed a necessary nuisance. The truth was, Roy had no appetite for anything but Julie. For days he’d been conscious of how badly he wanted to kiss her, but he hadn’t known what to expect once he did.

“Can I do anything to help?” Julie asked, coming into the kitchen. She sounded far more like herself.

“Not a thing. All I have to do is bring these dishes into the dining room.” He carried the salad out and set it on the table.

Julie walked over to the fireplace and once again her back was to him. “Your home is lovely.”

“Would you like a tour before we eat?”

She turned around, then surprised him by shaking her head. “I’m afraid we might not make it out of the bedroom.”

Roy had always found her honesty refreshing and never more than at that moment. He chuckled. “I’m feeling the same way myself.”

“I … we haven’t known each other long enough for that kind of commitment.”

Now, that was a word Roy tended to avoid. Instead of commenting, he chose to ignore it. “The salad is served.” He stood behind her chair and held it for her.

Once Julie was seated, he took his own place across from her; they both had a full view of the parade of Christmas ships as they sailed or motored past. Julie remarked every now and then on a certain theme or design. After a second glass of wine, she declined another.

Rejecting caution, Roy poured himself a third. He needed something to fortify him if he was going to battle temptation. And Julie tempted him, all right. It wasn’t easy to admit that, since Roy was a man who enjoyed being in control. And yet all through dinner—the chicken-and-mushroom dish, new potatoes and sautéed spinach—it wasn’t the food so expertly prepared or even their conversation that engaged him. No, what was foremost in Roy’s mind was the desire he felt for Julie. This weakness distressed him and yet … he hadn’t felt so alive in years.

“Dessert?” Julie asked.

The question startled Roy and he suddenly realized she’d carried the dinner plates into the kitchen and returned with two dessert plates. Cheesecake, if he recalled correctly.

“No.” For emphasis he shook his head. “On second thought …” He caught her around the waist and pulled her onto his lap.

She set the plates on the table, her face near his. Her eyes, dark and intense, were wide and so very expressive. They told him she wanted to kiss him again. Her throat was flushed, her skin warm. If her feelings were this easy to decipher, he could only imagine what she could read in his face.

“We’re supposed to be watching the ships, remember?” Her voice trembled.

“I know.”

She sighed and asked, “What’s happening to us?”

Roy knew, but he didn’t like the answer any more than he welcomed the question. “I don’t think we need to figure that out just yet.”

“My head’s spinning—and it doesn’t have anything to do with the wine.”

“Mine, too,” he told her. The alcohol was only partially responsible for the dizziness he was feeling.

“I … I saw a fish fly this afternoon,” she whispered. Her mouth was close to his ear.

Roy frowned, not understanding.

“It’s true,” she said, her voice still low. “I was at the Pike Place Market, and it seemed to leap off the crushed ice and fly of its own accord.”

“That isn’t possible,” Roy said impatiently. Either it was a trick of the eye or sleight of hand.

“That’s what I thought,” Julie told him. “Then it happened again and someone else saw it, too.”

“My guess is there’s a reason you’re telling me this.”

In response, she kissed the side of his neck. “The way I feel now is the same way I felt earlier when I saw that fish fly. I didn’t believe it, although I saw it with my own eyes. I felt a little ridiculous. And I wanted to deny it, pretend it hadn’t happened. Then, as I said, someone else confirmed what I’d seen and I realized I hadn’t imagined it, after all.”

“So …” Perhaps it was the scent of her perfume that clogged his brain. But for the life of him, Roy didn’t know what she was talking about or where this rather unusual story was taking him.

“I left quickly because I had to get away to think about it.”

Ah, Roy was beginning to understand, and his hold on her tightened. “You want to leave?”

“I should.”

“What if I asked you to stay?” Now he was the one kissing her, dropping light kisses along the side of her neck, hoping to lure her into spending the night. They were both adults who knew what they wanted, and he wasn’t interested in pretending otherwise.

Her answer was a long time in coming and held a pleading quality. “Don’t ask.”

“All right.” Difficult as it was, he relaxed his grip.

She stood up from his lap and Roy immediately missed the closeness. He got to his feet, ready to protest when she retrieved her coat from the closet.

“I don’t want you to go.”

She smiled, walked over to where he stood and kissed him on the mouth. “I don’t want to go, either.”

“Then stay.” He bit his tongue before he made the mistake of saying more. This decision had to be hers.

For just a moment, Roy thought he’d succeeded, but then he watched a renewed determination settle over her. “I can’t. I just saw a fish fly through the air.”

He didn’t know what it was about that stupid fish, but it appeared to have some significance for her.

“I can’t quite believe what’s happened,” she said, “but I’m afraid I’m falling in love with you.”

Love? Roy’s heart fell. That was the last thing he wanted to hear.

Seventeen

Julie stepped back from the freshly cut Christmas tree her father had grudgingly set up in a corner of the living room. This was probably the most difficult part of the Christmas season for him.

And for her.

Her mother had particularly loved their little tree-trimming ceremony. Just a year ago, the three of them had decorated the tree together. Andy Williams’s Christmas album had played in the background and the smell of popped corn had permeated the air.

“It’s perfect,” Julie announced.

Her father shrugged. “If you say so. I brought the decorations up from the basement.” He studied the tree, and Julie had the feeling that if she hadn’t made the effort this year, he’d be willing to forgo Christmas altogether.

“Did you find the Christmas CDs?” she asked.

“Nope.”

Julie suspected he hadn’t looked. They were no doubt packed away with the decorations.

“I think I’ll see how the Huskies are doing.” He picked up the remote. The University of Washington football team was her father’s favorite.

“You aren’t going to help decorate?” Julie hated the thought of doing it all by herself, but she didn’t want to force her father to participate. Lectures from her wouldn’t do any good, as Emily’s e-mail had reminded her that morning.

Her father’s eyes grew sad. “I’m sorry, Kitten, but I just don’t have the heart for it this year.”

He hardly ever called her Kitten, a name from her childhood, and she blinked away tears. After everything they’d endured, Julie couldn’t complain about his unwillingness to take part in an activity that brought back memories he might not be ready to face. “That’s okay,” she told him, although her heart was breaking. This was hard, so much harder than she’d realized it would be.

“I can do it,” Julie said more to convince herself than her father. Maybe it wouldn’t be as painful if he stayed in the room. “You can be my adviser.”

He acquiesced with a reluctant nod. Settling down in his usual chair, he flipped through several channels, then found the Huskies game.

Humming “Deck the Halls” to herself, Julie located the string of lights and began to weave it around the base of the evergreen, working her way upward. This task had always been reserved for her father. Afterward, Julie and Emily—before her twin sister’s marriage—along with their mother, took over the task of hanging the decorations. It had been an important tradition, representing a time of family fun, laughter and music. Now it seemed bleak and sad….

“Did you check those lights before you started putting them on the tree?” her father asked during the first commercial break.

“Uh …”

“I can see that you didn’t.” He clambered out of his chair. “Oh, all right, I’ll do the lights, but that’s it.”

“Thanks, Dad!”

“I should’ve known,” he muttered. “All you wanted me to do was put up the tree, you said. Well, I did that. Next thing you know, I’m stringing the lights. Are you plotting against me?”

“Would I do that?” she asked in a singsong voice that didn’t conceal her amusement.

Since there wasn’t much she could do while he strung the lights, Julie went into the kitchen and put a package of popcorn in the microwave. It was cheating, she supposed; her mother had done it the old-fashioned way. Still, popcorn was popcorn.

“If you’re going to be popping corn, I want the buttered kind.”

“Yes, Dad.”

He was almost finished with the lights by the time she returned to the living room, carrying a large bowl filled to overflowing with popcorn. She set it in the center of the coffee table and got down on all fours to sort through the boxes he’d brought up from the basement. Pulling out the small stack of CDs held together by a rubber band, she placed it conspicuously beside the bowl.

“Oh, go ahead, then. Put one on.”

She smiled and did exactly that, choosing a selection of instrumental Christmas classics.

Her father plugged in the lights. “I’ll probably be hanging the ornaments, too,” he grumbled. He paused long enough to grab a handful of popcorn. “Did I ever tell you about Christmas the first year your mother and I were married? We were too poor to afford a tree. A friend gave your mother a poinsettia, and we put our gifts under that.” He smiled at the memory. “It was the most pitiful-looking thing, but you’d have thought it was as grand as a fifteen-foot tree.”

Of all the gifts Julie had received through the years, perhaps the best was the fact that her parents had loved each other deeply.

“What I remember was all of us attending Christmas Eve services and then coming home and opening one gift each.” Julie and Emily were eight years old before they realized that the one gift they were allowed to open always turned out to be pajamas.

“I’m going to miss Mom’s turkey stuffing,” Julie said, sitting back on her heels. For both Thanksgiving and Christmas, her mother had prepared the traditional turkey. Every year she fretted over her stuffing and every year she outdid herself.

“Yours wasn’t bad,” her father assured her.

Like her mother, Julie had worried excessively over her first attempt at cooking the Thanksgiving turkey. “Thanks, Dad. I guess I must’ve picked up something all those years I spent helping Mom.” It felt good to be able to talk freely about her mother. Her father seemed to revel in it, too, although she knew he’d felt wary about reliving the past. Sharing memories made missing her less painful, and Julie knew that these memories would get them through the Christmas season. There would be poignant, tearful moments, but happy ones, too.

“Are you cooking a turkey for Christmas?” her father asked.

Julie hadn’t given the matter much thought. Christmas was still two weeks away, and it seemed a bit early to be thinking about what she’d serve. “I suppose.”

“Seems to me we had leftover turkey for at least a week after Thanksgiving.”

Julie took out the ornaments, examining each one. “Would you rather I made something else?”

“No, no, I like my turkey. It just seems a waste to buy a big bird for the two of us.”

“I could find a smaller one.”

“Or … maybe we should invite a few guests.”

“Guests? Who?” All their family was on the East Coast. Emily was in Florida, and longtime friends had their own families.

“What about Roy and his mother?”

He’d led into that suggestion with such ease Julie hadn’t seen it coming. For a moment, she was too surprised to respond.

“What do you think?” he asked, watching her.

“Well,” she said cautiously, “I don’t know.”

Her father brought the stepladder from the kitchen as he continued his task. “I met Anne this week, and she’s a sensible woman.”

Julie had liked Roy’s mother immensely—and she’d been given real insight into Anne’s son. On Saturday evening, she’d gone to his home with a new awareness of him, an appreciation for the man he was. Consequently her guard had been down. She’d felt as if her heart would shatter with joy when he kissed her. More than that, she’d sensed there could be a profound connection between them. But she had no way of knowing if Roy felt the same things she did. She believed he did, but that could be just wishful thinking.

“You’re not saying anything.” Her father frowned at her over the top of his reading glasses as he stood on the stepladder by the tree.

“That might be nice, but I’m not sure they’ll accept.”

“It won’t do any harm to ask.”

She agreed. This suggestion was unlike her father—but then it dawned on Julie that he might be saying something else. “You like Mrs. Fletcher, Dad?” It was logical; after all, he was alone, and so was Roy’s mother.

Her father paused, the string of lights dangling between his hands. “I know what you’re thinking, Julie.”

“Dad, Mrs. Fletcher is a wonderful woman.”

“I know she is, but I want to make something clear right now, and this is important. Anne Fletcher could never interest me romantically. No woman could replace your mother.”

“Dad, I didn’t mean—”

“I know you didn’t,” he said, cutting her off. “But it’s best to tell you that I don’t plan to remarry, ever. I loved your mother, and frankly, there’s no room in my heart for anyone else.”