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“All right. I’ve wanted you for two years.” She sighed impatiently, tugging harder. “And waiting for you to touch me again is making me crazy. So shut up and kiss me. Then maybe we can get back to being friends.”
He leaned down into her and nuzzled her hair. “We’ve never been friends, Danni. You never let me in,” he murmured in a warm, blurry voice, thick with desire.
Why did he think she hadn’t? She’d wanted this for so many years, ached for it, and getting close to him wasn’t an option when he was never close enough.
Need was pain now. She couldn’t think beyond him, his touch, his closeness that wasn’t close enough. “Now, Haskell, or I might have to kill you.”
With a low chuckle he turned his face, trailing his lips over her ear, her cheek and jaw…and she purred in the purest pleasure she’d ever known.
Hearing Danni making the little, feminine sounds of desire—how the hell has she wanted me for so long?—drove Jim almost out of his head; yet still he took his time, keeping his kisses slow, gentle and arousing. He tasted the silky skin of her jaw down to her throat. So soft and sweet…she tasted like rich, creamy ice cream.
He’d always had an unquenchable greed when it came to ice cream.
Did her mouth taste the same? He had to know—and she was turning her face, seeking his mouth in blind want. With a groan, he lifted her up against him—so small and sweet, this Danni; how could he ever have compared her to a Sherman tank?—and let it happen.
Bam.
He’d known for years he had the hots for Danni—what guy wouldn’t, given her delicate loveliness, the challenge of her defences and battleground intellect?—but he’d dismissed it as an inconvenient desire that would never stack up against his love for Laila. But man, with that first touch on his shoulder, meant only in comfort, Danni had knocked him for six in a way Laila never had.
Was it possible that, blinded by what he’d thought was real love for Laila, he’d been ignoring something incredible he could have had with Danni? All these years, thinking something was wrong with him, that only lightweight girls returned his desire, while the kind of woman he really wanted—intelligent, sensitive, focussed and strong, never wanted him…
Now his desire was being fulfilled by a woman who not only had all those qualities in spades, but was returning kiss for kiss. Her delicate roundness was lying flush against him, her throat made eager sounds…and he felt as if he were flying. The simple act of kissing—and he’d done a lot of it in the past three years, among other things—had never felt so amazing, so intense.
Why that suddenly brought everything back to him, he didn’t know. One moment he felt as if he were captain of Starship Danielle, the next he was putting her down, staggering back and staring at her as if—as if—
Damned if he knew what. Damned if he knew anything at this point.
Within a moment, he regretted his panic-inspired reaction, because Danni had gone from soft, flushed and starry-eyed to having more defences than a hedgehog. Her mouth, dark in the night but he knew was rosy and flushed from his kiss, opened to say something stinging—and he couldn’t think of a thing to say to stop her this time.
“Don’t tell me—‘it’s not you, it’s me,’” she said, her tone flippant. Her hands were on her hips, her chin up, ready to do battle.
The trouble was he’d dumped himself on earth from the stratosphere too fast; he couldn’t think beyond what had made him panic in the first place. “I don’t know who I am.” He half turned from her. “My father isn’t my father, either. Nobody is who I thought they were—and I’m not anything I thought I was. I have to know the truth.”
The sarcasm wiped from her face. When she spoke, the warm, half-laughing ruefulness reached inside his soul, into the pain and softening it. “That’s just typical of you, Haskell, you know that? You can put me in the wrong so fast my head spins.”
Ridiculously relieved that he’d somehow said the right thing with her for once, he grinned. “Well, you just made my head spin, so we’re even.”
In the moonlight, he could see her blush.
“I still want you, Danni.” He could hear the huskiness in his voice. “But I’ve got no idea where even I’m going from here, so I can’t say where we would go.”
“I know where you’re going. To your parents’ house,” she said, taking his hand. Her face was very gentle now. “From there—” she shrugged “—I never expected promises. We indulged ourselves for a few minutes, and it was pretty nice. But you have things you have to sort out, and I’m along for the ride while I work out my future. So let’s get back to…no, let’s become friends, Jim Haskell.” With a lifted chin and a smile of promised camaraderie, she shook the hand she held.
Not for long, though. Jim released her hand so fast she stumbled back over one of the tree roots, staring at him in shock.
No way!
He could see the danger signs plastered, posted and splashed all over whatever this was with Danni. After that life-changing kiss, she was saying she hadn’t wanted anything from him beyond the moment.
Liar. Liar!
Danni Morrison was not about to become another woman in the life of Jim Haskell, Woman’s Best Friend!
Without warning, everything that had happened to him tonight—or maybe all his life—took its toll. Nothing would ever be the same again—and happy-go-lucky, roll-with-the-punches Jim Haskell disappeared. Pure, unadulterated fury flooded through him, all of it currently aimed at the woman trying not to land on her butt between tree roots and powdery red earth.
She’d never called him a friend before—he sure as hell wasn’t going to let her get away with that kind of cowardice now. He’d become Danni’s friend when the equator froze over. The woman was always geared for battle—he’d see how she handled it when someone took up the gauntlet.
Without warning he grabbed her hand. “Come on, let’s hit the road,” he snarled.
“Jim, what are you doing?” she cried as he all but dragged her into the restaurant and snatched up her bag.
“You coming?” he challenged her when, clearly embarrassed by everyone’s laughter and knowing grins, she began to pull back, trying to get him to release her hand. “Are you keeping your word, or will you keep lying to me like you just did? Are you going to turn coward and bail because someone finally called your bluff after all these years?”
That was all he needed to say. Her chin lifted, her nostrils flared and she looked at him as if she hated his guts, but she said, “Don’t bother turning the tables on me with my own sarcasm, Haskell. I’ve done years more psychology than you’ll ever know.”
“Good, then you can psychoanalyse me on the road, can’t you?”
“Or ditch you on it!”
“Yeah, go for it.” With deliberate patronage, he patted her on the head. “You handle the verbal attacks. Let’s see you get physical again.” He grinned down at her. “I dare you.”
The entire table of their mutual friends burst into stunned laughter. Laila was blinking, laughing with the others, but clearly flabbergasted. Her best friend—everyone’s best friend, sweet and patient, giving Jimmy Haskell had shown his darker side for the first time, not backing down an inch, and none of them knew why.
Damned if he knew why, either. Who would have guessed Danni of all people had the power to bring out the tiger in him? Jim himself hadn’t dreamed of it until a few minutes ago. But he’d had enough of losing to the women he really wanted.
He didn’t question why he really wanted Danni—he only knew he did. And he would not take her offer of friendship lying down. This time he’d fight, right to the finish.
She wanted him, damn it—and he’d force her to come out of wherever she was hiding, make her come to him, to touch him. He’d make her purr for him again….
It seemed he’d knocked out this particular little champ, at least for the moment. Danni’s delectable mouth remained closed, but sparks of fury told Jim the bell for the next round was about to ring—as soon as they were alone.
He kissed Laila’s cheek. “Congrats, babe. Got to go. I’ll call you, okay? Love you.”
“You okay, Jimmy?” she whispered.
About to reassure his best friend, he remembered Danni’s words about lying to Laila and making her more worried. “No, but I will be. With a little help from my new friend.” He flicked a deliberate, knowing grin at Danni, whose tight mouth and paleness around distended nostrils told him that friendship was the last thing on her mind when it came to him.
Good, he thought in intense satisfaction. He’d rather keep her in a constant passion, even if it was pure fury, than ever receive another offer of friendship from her.
He was going to keep it that way from now on. Bringing Danni’s passion to life was worth the price he’d pay later, no matter what kind of passion it was.
And for once, he was looking forward to the battle.
CHAPTER THREE
AS HE DRAGGED HER OUT the door, the last thing Danni saw was her best friend’s face. Laila was gaping at Jim as if she’d never seen him before.
Or she’d never seen him in this state.
So he’d loved Laila all those years, but she’d never brought out the caveman in him? A wave of raw, hot pleasure swept through her. Fascinating…
With a little smile she was careful to hide, she snapped back at Jim, “No need to beat me over the head with your club. You can let go. I already said I was coming with you.”
He shot a dark look at her. “Better leave your car where it won’t get stolen or towed. We’ll be gone at least a week.”
“Good idea. My former landlady wouldn’t mind garaging it for a few days.”
“Let’s go then.” Finally he let go of her hand.
She rubbed it. “I think you cut off my circulation.”
The Jim of an hour before would immediately have backed down, apologised. This Jim lifted a brow. “I think you liked it.”
He was right, but no way was she going to show him that. “Can I have my bag, please? A bit hard to drive without my licence or keys.”
He tossed it over without a word, before he got into his gorgeous Range Rover—it was a couple of years old, but a definite up-scaling from the half-dead old Valiant of his student days—firing it up hard.
She spent the drive to Mrs. Woodward’s boarding house watching him follow her there, and trying to work out what she’d done to turn the official World’s Nicest Guy into this challenging stranger. She thought she’d been sweeter and kinder to him than she’d ever been with a man in her life.
With a little frown, she gave it up. Whatever she’d done, she’d either repeat the offence and evoke the same reaction in him, or he’d tell her.
Probably the former, she admitted to herself, grinning—and she’d do it again gladly. Whatever she’d done, at least it had wiped the confused despair from his eyes…
She could have walked from the Jim she’d known, and become his friend if he’d needed it. Though it wouldn’t have been easy, after that awesome kiss. The man packed a sensual punch she’d never known before. Offering plain friendship, uncomplicated by the desire clawing through her, had been much harder than she’d expected it to be.
She’d never found it hard to walk away from any man before. But from the moment he’d let her fall back into the tree she’d known letting go wasn’t going to be the easy option. The old, sunny Jim had always been gorgeous to her, but this new man intrigued her in a way everybody’s best friend Jim never could have. The unashamed hot wanting, raw anger, strong principles and picking up her every challenge without fear lifted plain, old-fashioned lust that didn’t have to go anywhere, to a fascination she couldn’t deny.
In half an hour the tabby cat had become a stalking lion. There were depths to Jim she’d never dreamed existed. At least she wouldn’t need to worry that she’d have to sit beside an emotional basketcase all the way to Goodoona, the outback town where his family lived. Jim was a survivor—just as she was.
Once she’d made the arrangements with Mrs. Woodward, she parked her car safely and climbed into the Range Rover beside him. “I’m going to need my clothes, and to check out of the hotel.” She named the place.
He revved up the four-wheel drive necessary for his line of work and locale, and headed toward the hotel. “I’m staying in the place next door. I’ll get my stuff and check out while you do the same.”
They were on the road within half an hour, heading north out of the university town toward the outback.
“We won’t have streetlights for long. Watch out for kangaroos,” she reminded him when the silence became uncomfortable…and she began to think of their last silence.
He sent her a withering glance. “I grew up in the outback. Why do you think I’ve got the roll bars?”
She shrugged. “Just making sure. I don’t want to become another Rebecca.” One of their former classmates had swerved off the road to avoid hitting a kangaroo, hit a tree head-on instead and was lucky to be alive. Her new life in a wheelchair gave Rebecca massive challenges in her veterinary work. She’d graduated a year after everyone else, thanks to six months on her back and another six or more in physical therapy.
He gave her a sideways look while still watching the road. “I’m sure Rebecca didn’t want to become a Rebecca.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.” In fact, she was close friends with Rebecca. Her all-female practice in Sydney was one of the two job offers Danni was contemplating. At least she’d be safe from the unwanted male attention her little-girl-lost looks seemed to draw to her.
He shrugged. “Then you should think before you speak.”
She clenched her fists in the darkness. “I’m not stupid. I get the picture. How have I become pond scum in the last half hour? I made you angry somehow. So tell me what I did, or get over it. Otherwise I’ll be tempted to bail right here and now, and walk back to Bathurst.”
He frowned hard. “Bail if you want, Danni. No one’s forcing you to come. If you’ve changed your mind I’ll drive you back now.”
She sighed loudly. “I didn’t say I wanted to bail. I just want to know what’s going on.”
Silence for a moment. “How about I got the shock of my life tonight and I’m trying to come to terms with it? You know, not everything is about you.”
His family.
She tapped her fingernails on the dashboard, feeling small and stupid, and more than a bit self-centred. “Of course not. I’m sorry, Jim.”
He flashed a grin at her, so big she could see the gleam of his teeth in the half dark of the streetlights. “Danni Morrison’s apologised to me twice in one night. The world must be coming to an end.”
Despite wanting to keep up her martyr’s position, she caught herself laughing. “Yeah, it must be. I’m apologising, and Jim Haskell’s found his temper. If we don’t watch out you’ll become a regular caveman, and I’ll end up like one of the Stepford Wives.”
He chuckled. “I don’t think there’s much danger of either happening for long.”
A shame, really…The caveman look is pretty sexy on you.
She had no idea she’d said it out loud until the truck swerved, before he righted it.
Holding onto the balancing handles on the door, she cried, “Watch it, Haskell. I’m not ready to die yet!”
“Then don’t say things like that to a man when he’s driving.” But he was laughing—and he didn’t complete her humiliation by commenting further on her unconscious verbal blooper. “And for the record, Danni, I don’t think becoming Miss Sweetness and Light would do a thing for you.”
She lifted a brow. “So you need to change, but I don’t?” she taunted, to keep up the banter, to see how far he’d go with it—and to keep him awake. It was already late.
His face darkened. “I think change is being forced on me whether I like it or not.”
Without warning, her throat thickened to a hard ache, but she forced it down. She hadn’t cried since she was eight years old, and she wasn’t about to start now. To distract him—or maybe because she wanted to—she said huskily, “For the record, Haskell, I thought you were pretty sexy long before the caveman emerged.”
This time the silence was charged with unseen fire. “You say that again, Danni, and I’ll toss your friendship offer out the door,” he growled. “A man has his limits.”
She felt the heat fill her entire body. Was that what she wanted? Wasn’t it what she wanted—to be in his arms again, feeling so glorious, feminine and alive as she never had with any man?
Is that what I want—to have a fling with a man who, as honest and giving as he is, will only walk away in the end? I’m not enough for any man.
And Jim had lost enough. The last thing he ought to do now was start a relationship with a woman who knew nothing about love and commitment and happy-ever-after.
Coward. You’re making excuses because you’re afraid. Yet it was as much truth as lie. She had no clue where she wanted to go from here—and he hadn’t said a word about what he wanted, beyond the obvious.
Swallowing down the urge to blurt out what she wanted, she murmured instead, “Mea culpa. Bad timing.”
He nodded, his face tight.
Her phone rang—the clashing sound she’d put on to warn her one of her parents was calling. She glanced at Jim. “I’m sorry for whatever you’re about to hear.
“Hello,” she answered quietly.
“Danielle,” the anxious voice of her mother came down the line. Her mother always sounded like a fluttering bird caught in a trap, except when she was talking to her husband. “Was it a nice night for Laila?”
“It was lovely, Mum. Laila made honours. She’ll be setting up a practice once the new baby’s crawling.”
She felt Jim’s glance touch her for a moment. It wasn’t about Laila, she knew that. He and Laila were still very close, so he’d have heard all the news about her plans to open a practice in a year’s time. So he must be reacting to the tightness of her voice. Wondering whether it was talking of Laila that had her so tense, or talking to her mother.
“Ally must be so big now!”
She started at her mother’s voice. “Yes, she was running around the hall all day, and the restaurant tonight. Nobody can hold her for long. Just like her mother. She looks more like Jake, though.”
“You must tell them to come see me before they head to Queensland, or maybe after the baby’s born. It doesn’t look as though I’ll be a grandmother any time soon. I’d like to hold a baby again.”
Her mother didn’t know how to tease. She’d spoken blunt truth…but it would take a miracle for Danni to become a mother.
A mother. Pain slashed through her. As if she’d ever have a baby, with her lack of nurturing skills. All she knew was how to fight, and she’d never put a child through the constant battles she’d lived all her life. “I’ll tell them.”
“When are you coming home to see us, Danielle? You haven’t been home in almost two months.”
“I know.” Ever since the last episode, Danni didn’t respond to her parents’ guilt trips. That house hadn’t been home to her for a very long time. “I’m busy. I’ll come when I can.”
“What are you doing now?” her mother asked eagerly. “I know you’re between jobs. If Laila’s going home to Burrabilla, you can—”
“How do you know I’m between jobs?”
The sharp tone stopped her mother halfway through her sentence. “You didn’t answer your phone for a few days, so I called your practice. They said you left a few weeks ago.”
She refused to respond to the reproach in her mother’s tone. “I’ve told you before, Mum—don’t call me at work unless it’s an emergency.”
“What else could I do, when you weren’t answering your phone?”
Realise I need space from you, and back off for a few days!
“Danielle!”
Her mother’s gasp told her she’d done it again. Tonight must be the night she said all the things that, until now, she’d only thought. But no matter how much she wanted to, she couldn’t back down. “I don’t want to hurt you, Mum, but if I say sorry now, you’ll only use it as a weapon against me from now on.” And for the next thirty years, like you do with Dad.
It was bad enough being their referee. She’d spent her whole life avoiding giving her mother reasons to punish her, the way Mum punished Dad. The perfect child, always doing the right thing…and they’d been so proud of her. So when the strain had become too much, she’d simply moved out. It wasn’t so hard being nice in a few conversations every day, and monthly or so visits.
“I am your mother, Danielle,” her mother said now, voice shaking.
Danni sighed, rubbing her forehead as the beginnings of a tension headache began. She’d hurt her mum. “I know that, and I love you. But you don’t do anything apart from your job but keep house, play solitaire and talk to me. You need to get out of the house, find friends—get a life beyond me.” And being nasty to and about Dad…
“Your father and I both want you to come home to see us.”
Danni knew the inflexible tone—her mother had reached her limits and was reasserting authority. “I can’t. A—a friend needs me. I’m going home with him for a few days.”
“Him?” The tone was infused with sudden life. The hope for grandchildren was the one thing that kept both parents going.
“Yes. Jim Haskell. Remember him? Laila’s other best friend?” She slid an apologetic glance at Jim, who appeared to be concentrating on the deep darkness of the unlit country road and the song from the CD player, singing along softly.
“The tall, handsome one with the curly hair?”
Danni bit her lip over a grin. “Yes, Mum, the tall, handsome one with the curly hair—and he’s sitting right beside me,” she said in a mock-long-suffering tone.
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