Somewhere to Call Home

“I can’t seem to help it. I fear a calamity is bound to happen at any moment, and I don’t want to see it or be part of it.”

“Oh, accidents do happen, and frequently. But most times they aren’t all that serious.” He grinned at her. “However, it might be best if you try not to shut your eyes, or pray that our driver doesn’t shut his, as well.”

Violet laughed with him. “Yes, I can see how that might help. I’ll try, but I can’t promise.”

Just then, an omnibus careened around a corner and seemed to be heading straight for them. Violet scrunched her eyes shut tight and screamed.

* * *

After a much-needed nap, Violet woke refreshed and looking forward to dinner, in spite of feeling horrible about screaming in Mrs. Heaton’s ear. When that omnibus had come straight toward their hack, she’d been certain it was going to topple them over. Thankfully, the Lord had been with them and, just in the nick of time, their driver had avoided the calamity.

The Heatons had assured her, over and over again, that they understood, and told her that if not for her scream, their driver might not have acted so quickly. Still, she felt a bit silly and embarrassed about it all. Hopefully, it wouldn’t be a topic of conversation at dinner.

She chose a gown of purple moiré that was several years old, but still in style. At least it had been back home. She only hoped it wasn’t terribly outdated here in New York City.

After dressing her hair into a psyche knot, Violet turned this way and that in front of the standing mirror in the corner. The dress had an ivory lace inset in the bodice and a high collar and waistband of a darker shade of purple. It showed little wear, and, well, it would have to do. Even if she chose another gown, it would not be new.

After Mama had her stroke there’d been no money for new clothes, not even homemade ones, and Violet had no interest in them anyway. All she’d wanted was for her mother to get well. But that wasn’t to be and, oh, how she missed her. Grief, sudden and sharp, threatened to engulf Violet, until she remembered the promise she’d made to her mother just before she had passed away.

Mama had been so alert for just those few moments as she’d grasped her hand and said, “Violet, now don’t you give yourself over to grief once I’m gone. You’ve been a blessing to me and I don’t know what I would have done without you. I want you to get on with your life. The Lord has great plans for you. I know you’ll miss me, but I pray your days will be full of life and joy and living according to the Lord’s will. When you start to give in to the grief, think of me in Heaven. Promise me, Violet, for I’m ready to go.”

“I promise, Mama,” Violet had said. Her mother had squeezed her hand, closed her eyes and slipped away. Remembering how peaceful her mother had looked, Violet let one last sob escape before she wiped at her tears. They wouldn’t bring her mother back, and Violet wouldn’t have wanted her to suffer just to stay here for her sake.

She let out a huge sigh and nodded to herself. Enough of this—it wasn’t what Mama would want. She would honor her mother’s wishes and her promise to her. But, oh, how she wished she’d been with her today to see all the sights and hubbub of this city. It comforted her to think that maybe she saw it all from Heaven.

Hearing the sounds of the other boarders begin to make their way downstairs, Violet hurried into the bathroom to splash water on her face, trying to get rid of the telltale tears. She pinched her cheeks to give them color and took a deep breath before stepping out into the hall.

Violet hoped she wasn’t overdressed, or underdressed, as she headed down to the parlor to join everyone. She was relieved to see that Elizabeth was dressed much as she was in a pale blue gown, and she put her worries about how she looked away.

“Violet, did you have a good day?” Elizabeth asked as she led the way downstairs. “I asked my friend about openings at Tiffany Glass, and as I suspected, there aren’t any at present. Still, she said she’d let me know when one comes up. Evidently it’s fairly often.”

“Thank you for asking about it, Elizabeth. I did have a good day. I rode on the El for the first time and I know where several companies are that I’ll apply at on Monday, including Butterick.”

Elizabeth chuckled. “Riding on the El for the first time is an experience, but you get used to it very quickly. I’m so glad there is an opening at Butterick. I’ll be praying you get that position and then we can be coworkers, too.”

They were both laughing when they joined the others in the parlor just as Mrs. Heaton called them to the dining room. Again, Violet found herself sitting adjacent to Michael and across from Lila.

After Michael said the blessing and began carving the large ham Gretchen had set before him, Mrs. Heaton introduced a new man at the table as John Talbot, a reporter for the New York Tribune. He’d been covering a charity ball the night before.

“Pleased to meet you, Miss Burton,” he said. He was about her age and clean-shaven, with rust-colored hair and greenish-blue eyes. He didn’t have the rough demeanor she’d thought a seasoned reporter might possess; instead, he looked like someone she could have gone to school with.

“Thank you, Mr. Talbot. I’m pleased to meet you, as well.”

“How are you enjoying our city?”

“With her eyes closed.” Michael chuckled and winked at Violet as he handed her a plate with a slice of ham.

His wink sent her heart into a little dive and dip and she felt color flood her cheeks, but she couldn’t help but join in his laughter as she passed the plate down. “I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to the traffic.”

That brought laughter from all at the table and several nods of agreement.

“Oh...yes, well, that can take some getting used to. But it is easier with your eyes open,” John said. “Did you apply for any positions today?”

“Not today, but I found several I’ll apply for come Monday.”

“Oh!” Lila put a hand over her mouth, then removed it to say, “I am so sorry. I forgot to ask if there are any open positions at Butterick today. We were very busy and it totally slipped my mind. But, I’ll be sure to ask on Monday.” She ladled a spoonful of scalloped potatoes onto her plate.

“No need to worry, Lila. There was an ad in the classifieds today,” Mrs. Heaton said. “Violet is going to apply there first thing.”

“Oh...” Lila nearly dropped the casserole dish she was passing down the table. “That’s good. Maybe we’ll be coworkers after all.”

Violet didn’t know if she meant it or not, but Lila did smile across the table at her. For some reason she didn’t think Lila liked her very much. Then she told herself that she had no way of knowing that. Still, it didn’t dispel the feeling she had that Lila wished she hadn’t come to live at the Heatons’ boardinghouse. Violet thought it might have something to do with Michael. Lila tried to catch his attention at every opportunity, and it was obvious that she was very interested in him, but so far he didn’t seem to be giving her any more attention than he gave the other women. Violet hoped to become friends with all the boarders, but she wasn’t sure it was going to happen with Lila. Only time would tell.

She was relieved when the conversation turned from her to the other boarders. She liked hearing about their days and the rest of the meal was quite enjoyable for Violet. Mr. Talbot entertained them with stories from the ball he’d covered the night before.

Up until now the names he mentioned were those that Violet had occasionally seen in the newspaper, but none of their activities mattered much to her. However, they seemed to mean a lot to those around the dinner table. He was plied with questions about what the ladies wore, what was served and whom they talked to.

The conversation took them through a dessert of cherry pie à la mode and into the parlor afterward. This time Violet stayed for a while and, although she didn’t join in on the conversations, she enjoyed listening and learning more about this city she would be calling home.

When everyone began heading to their rooms, Violet found herself going up the stairs with Elizabeth, Julia and Lila.

“What are you going to do tomorrow, Violet?” Julia asked. “If you don’t have any plans, you are welcome to come home with me and have Sunday dinner with my family. Lila and Elizabeth are coming, and my mother always has plenty.”

“Oh, thank you so much, Julia. But Michael and his mother mentioned something about showing me Central Park after church and Sunday dinner.”

“Oh?” Lila arched an eyebrow and seemed to be waiting for an answer of some kind.

Violet didn’t know what to say except, “I believe so.”

“Oh, you’ll love that, won’t she, Lila?” Julia turned to the other girl. “We often go there as a group.”

“I’d love to go with you all sometime.” Violet was a little disappointed at having to miss the opportunity to get to know the girls better.

“Oh, there will be other times—don’t you worry. We go on outings together quite frequently, don’t we, Lila?” Elizabeth nudged the girl.

Lila gave a very brief smile. It was so quick, Violet was certain that had she blinked, she might have missed it.

On the other hand, maybe it was better that she couldn’t spend the day with them. Besides, she’d had such a good time with Michael and his mother that she was really looking forward to the next day. “I’m sorry I can’t go with you to meet your family tomorrow, but thank you for the invitation.”

“You’re welcome. There’ll be another time,” Julia said.

They’d reached the top of the stairs when Lila said, “Elizabeth, could you come to my room, please? I want you to help me pick out what to wear tomorrow.”

“Of course,” Elizabeth said before turning to Violet and Julia. “Good night, Violet. We’ll see you tomorrow evening. I hope you have a wonderful time. Night, Julia.”

“Good night, all,” Julia said from her doorway.

“I hope you all have a wonderful time, too,” Violet said. “Good night, Julia, Elizabeth and Li—”

“Come on, Elizabeth,” Lila said, pulling the young woman into her room and shutting the door.

Julia smiled at Violet and shrugged. “Obviously, Lila is in a tizzy about something. Don’t let her bother you. She’s just like that.”

“No. I won’t. Good night.”

“Good night.” Julia yawned and shut her door.

Violet opened the door to her room more certain than ever that Lila did not like her. And she had a feeling she was the cause of whatever kind of tizzy Lila was in.

* * *

Violet joined the Heatons for church the next morning, and they introduced her to some of their friends and neighbors. She felt welcomed and it was good to be with friends on this Lord’s day.

Since her mother’s death, Violet had questioned the Lord as to why He’d taken her away, and then when she’d found out that Harlan Black held the mortgage to their home, she had even more questions on why the Lord would let that happen, causing her to leave the home she’d been raised in and her lifelong friends.

If the Lord had answered, she hadn’t heard it yet. And deep down, much as she hated to admit it, she was afraid. Afraid that Harlan would come after her, afraid of this city that was so huge, afraid of being alone—afraid of so many things for the first time in her life.

She was truly thankful that she had Mrs. Heaton and Michael to turn to, that she had a place to stay. She was hopeful that she would find work in the coming week and would soon find the city not so strange and that she would begin to have the same confidence she’d felt in her hometown. She wasn’t used to feeling vulnerable, and she didn’t like it one bit.

A peace she hadn’t felt in a long time settled over her as she sat between Michael and his mother, and the minister began his sermon. Taken from Isaiah, it comforted her for it said not to fear, not to be dismayed, that the Lord was her God and that He would strengthen and help her. That He would uphold her with His righteous hand. Violet wanted to believe it, but it’d been so hard in the past few months. Still, she would try to hang on to her faith, shaky as it seemed lately. She desperately needed to believe that the Lord was with her now.

Chapter Four

After a wonderful Sunday lunch shared by some, but not all, of the boarders—Julia, Lila and Elizabeth were gone of course—Violet was quite pleased that Michael followed through with his mother’s suggestion to show her Central Park. He’d made arrangements to hire a surrey so that he could drive, and Mrs. Heaton had him help her into the backseat, insisting that Violet ride up front beside him so that she could see better.

Michael helped her into the buggy and then went around and hopped in beside her. Violet wasn’t sure why she felt safer with him handling the reins instead of a paid driver, but she did.

They headed down the street to Fifth Avenue, and although there was traffic, Violet was pleased that it didn’t seem quite as hectic as the day before. There were many people out and about, but the pace of the traffic was slower as they turned onto the avenue and headed north past Madison Square Park and the Fifth Avenue Hotel.

“Look, Violet.”

Violet looked back to see that Mrs. Heaton was pointing to the left.

“There is Delmonico’s. It is supposed to be one of the best restaurants in the city and, from what I hear, it is quite the place to see and be seen.”

“Perhaps we’ll stop there for dinner on the way home and see whom we can see and be seen by.” Michael laughed and winked at Violet, who couldn’t contain her chuckle—or the flush of heat that crept up her cheeks.

“Perhaps we should,” Mrs. Heaton said somberly. But then she joined in the laughter.

They passed several large churches, including the Marble Collegiate Church and the Brick Presbyterian.

Michael pointed out the Waldorf Hotel, explaining that rumor had it that it had resulted from a family feud between William Waldorf Astor and his aunt, Caroline Astor. “William, the nephew, had always resented that even though he had more money than his aunt did, she held the social leadership of the family. So to spite her, he had his own house razed and the hotel built. It opened in ’93. It must have provoked his aunt, because just last year she had a home built on down the avenue next to Central Park.”

Mrs. Heaton took up the story from there, pointing to construction going on next to the hotel. “Now her son, John Jacob Astor IV, has had her old mansion next to the Waldorf torn down and is building a hotel of his own.” She shook her head. “There is no telling how it will all end up.”

“Probably not,” Violet agreed although she knew absolutely no more than she’d been told about the families. Nonetheless, it was all very entertaining.

There were many carriages out and about on the avenue, and it was quite obvious when they passed those of great wealth. Their vehicles were larger and grander, for one thing. And many of them were open so that one could see from the way the occupants were dressed that they were of the upper echelon of society.

However, there were many others who appeared to be dressed as she and Mrs. Heaton were—still in their Sunday best, but far less elegant than the rich. Violet felt quite comfortable traveling in the company she was with.

They passed several more mansions and churches before Michael said, “This is known as Vanderbilt Row.”

The mansions occupied a whole block, and Violet was so impressed at the size and the design of the elegant buildings, she had to remind herself to close her gaping mouth. There were balconied windows with intricately carved trims around the windows and between each floor, and moldings everywhere.

Michael leaned a little closer to Violet. “A far cry from what we’re used to, isn’t it?”

“Oh, yes.” Violet shook her head. “I can’t imagine living in anything that size or that grand. Why, one could get lost.”

“I’m sure I would.” Michael chuckled.

“Well, I think I much prefer my small family home in Ashland or your mother’s boardinghouse to such opulence.”

“Why, thank you, Violet,” Michael’s mother said from the backseat.

Soon they arrived at Central Park and Michael drove the surrey into it. They passed from the city into a tree-lined road that ran through the park until the scene before them opened up to a huge space, beautiful and unspoiled.

“It looks untouched, as if it’s been here from the first,” Violet said.

Michael shook his head. “Every bit of the park has been landscaped. None of it is like it was to begin with and, from what I’ve heard, that’s a good thing.”

As they kept riding, Violet was taken aback by the sheer size of it. “I had no idea it was this large or this beautiful.”

They passed waterways and ponds, and at the north end there was a huge lake where she could see couples boating. There were trails leading off in all kinds of directions, and people walking, riding or sitting on park benches. The perfume of blooming flowers of all kinds permeated the air around them, and Violet sighed at the beauty of it all. She couldn’t wait to spend a whole day here.

“There are outdoor music concerts this time of year, and, oh, the ice-skating in the winter is wonderful,” Mrs. Heaton said.

“Ice-skating?”

“Yes,” Michael said. “We’ll have to go, if you’re still here by then.”

Violet wasn’t sure what to say. She’d love to go ice-skating here, but her goal was to stay only long enough to pay off the mortgage on her home. She couldn’t imagine living here for any longer.

“New Yorkers of every nationality and status love this park,” his mother said, saving Violet from having to say anything.

“I can well see why,” Violet agreed. “It is simply amazing right here in the middle of the city.”

“It didn’t start that way,” Michael said. “At first, the wealthy were the ones who mostly took advantage of it and there was a lot of discussion on just whose park it was. But with the El and all manner of other transportation, it’s easier for all New Yorkers to enjoy fresh air and sunshine these days, and now the park is enjoyed by anyone who can get to it.”

“I’m glad,” Violet said. It didn’t seem right that only the wealthy should enjoy something so beautiful.

As they left the park and started back down Fifth Avenue, Michael said, “It’s about dinnertime. How does Delmonico’s sound? Should we see and be seen?”

“Oh, Michael, I was just teasing about that,” Mrs. Heaton said. “Besides, I should get back and see about the boarders’ meal.”

“Mother, you know the boarders realize that our Sunday night suppers are whatever you, Gretchen or Maida decide to put out for them. Maida will take care of it and they will be fine.”

“But it’s expensive, Michael—”

“No buts. I may not be able to afford a mansion on Fifth Avenue, but I think I can manage to take us to Delmonico’s. We’re going.”

Violet wasn’t quite sure how she felt about it, but Mrs. Heaton seemed quite pleased, and she didn’t have the heart to object and take the smile from her face.

Once at the elegant restaurant, they were shown to a table and given menus. Thankfully, the interior was dimly lit, because while a few other female diners were dressed in the manner that she and Mrs. Heaton were, most were dressed in gowns the likes of which Violet had never even dreamed of owning.

She felt a bit out of place, but if Mrs. Heaton did, it never showed, and Violet tried to relax and enjoy herself. There were so many offerings on the menu, both in English and French, Violet wasn’t sure what to order and asked Michael to choose. He chose lobster bisque to begin the meal of the Delmonico steak with asparagus and creamed potatoes.

Violet had never seen the evidence of so much wealth in her life from both the sights she’d seen on Fifth Avenue to the clientele of Delmonico’s. Once the waiter left them alone, she said so.

“There is a lot of wealth in New York City, to be sure. But there is also great poverty. You just can’t see it from here,” Michael said. “You will, though. You can’t live in the city for long and not become aware of it.”

“That’s true,” Mrs. Heaton agreed. “It is a shame, but a fact that cannot be disputed.”

“I think I’m glad I belong to neither group...although if I don’t find work soon, I could certainly become one of the impoverished,” Violet said.

“That isn’t going to happen, dear. Neither Michael nor I would see you turned out on the streets.”

“Oh, I didn’t mean... I know I have a place to stay and I’ll find work. What I meant was that I’m a lot closer to being poor than I am to being rich, and I don’t think I’d like to be either.”

Michael said, “I understand, and I must admit it is a great comfort to know that I have enough to enjoy my life, but not so much that someone would want to take it from me—or so little I’d want to take it from someone else.”

“Michael! You’d never do that.”

“I would not, Mother. But in this city, many do just that. I own a detective agency, Violet, and I’ve seen it all. Many who are poor will do most anything to survive, and some of the rich will do most anything to keep what they have.”

* * *

On the ride home Violet couldn’t remember ever having enjoyed a day more. The meal had been excellent, although she didn’t want to even think of how much it must have cost Michael to indulge in that way.

“Thank you for such a wonderful day. I only wish my mother could have been here to take it all in.”

“Oh, so do I, my dear,” Mrs. Heaton said. “She would have loved being here with us all.”

“Yes, she would have.”

Violet’s mother had told her that Mr. Heaton had left his wife and son fairly well off when he passed away. They weren’t wealthy like the Astors and the Vanderbilts she was learning so much about, but she had a feeling they could have been living in a style above that of running a boardinghouse. Mrs. Heaton still didn’t know what had happened to her daughter or even if she was still alive. And yet, she’d chosen to come to this city and reach out to others. That Mrs. Heaton chose to do that, to be there for young women who needed a place to feel safe, and that her son chose to support her in that endeavor, was proof enough for Violet that her sweet landlady sought to do the Lord’s will in her life. And Michael seemed to do the same.

All she knew about Rebecca’s disappearance was what her mother had told her. According to her, Rebecca had been talking about going to New York City for months before she actually did. Mrs. Heaton hadn’t been happy about it, but Becca was determined and of age and there wasn’t anything she could really do stop her from going. She’d evidently written to tell her mother that she was settled in a boardinghouse and would keep in touch. But that was the last they had heard from her. Finally after a couple of months with no answers from Rebecca, Mrs. Heaton received a packet with all her letters returned to her unopened with a note from the landlady saying that Rebecca hadn’t lived there in over a month. Violet couldn’t even imagine coming to this city without knowing anyone as Rebecca Heaton had done, and she was very thankful that the Heatons were here for her now.

Michael took his mother and Violet back to the boardinghouse before taking the surrey back to the livery and then walking back home. He helped his mother out first and then gave a hand to Violet to help her.

“I hope you enjoyed your day, Violet.”

“Oh, I enjoyed every minute. Thank you for dinner, Michael. It was wonderful.”

“I enjoyed it, too.” He stood there looking down at her for a moment before clearing his throat and taking a step back. “I’ll be back home soon.”

But he watched her and his mother get to the front door before taking up the reins and heading out.

When she and Mrs. Heaton entered the house, Violet realized that if it didn’t feel like home yet, it was beginning to feel very close to it. And once she thought about being alone back in Ashland, it felt even better to be here.