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She lifted Michales, she hugged him against her and she held him tight, as if he were a shield.
She’d been out of control. Again. After all she’d been through. After all her vows. This man just had to touch her and here she was, tumbling into trust again.
Trust meant heartache. Trust meant betrayal and grief.
Do not trust this man.
This had to stop—now.
Had he messed it up entirely?
He’d come here with a business proposition. He’d never imagined he could seduce her into doing what he wanted.
Was that what she was thinking?
Who knew what she was thinking? She looked dazed.
He felt dazed.
He had to get this back on an impersonal footing.
‘That’s just what we don’t want,’ he managed.
‘Sorry?’
‘That wasn’t meant to happen. We need to keep this impersonal or we’ll mess this up entirely.’
‘Right,’ she said, as if she didn’t understand a word he’d said. Which was exactly how he felt.
‘I’ll come again tomorrow,’ he said, struggling to sound brisk and businesslike. ‘Meanwhile, will you do some research? Discover what I’ve said is true?’
Her face had become… blank? It was as if she’d just terrified herself and was struggling back from the abyss. Struggling to hold on to what she knew.
‘I don’t know why I did that,’ she whispered. ‘It was crazy. I didn’t mean it. I don’t want it. I don’t want you to touch me.’
She was lying. They both knew it. But there was fear behind her words. He didn’t understand it.
She’d come to him last time with joy. Had being pregnant changed something so fundamental that she was afraid of his effect on her?
‘I want my freedom,’ she said, a flat statement, unequivocal.
What sort of a need was that?
But freedom was the one thing he was more than prepared to give. After all, wasn’t that what he wanted himself?
‘You can have it,’ he said. ‘But marry me first.’
‘I can’t.’
‘I believe you can. For Michales’s sake.’
‘You… don’t want Michales for him. You just want him for your island.’
He hesitated, letting himself look at the little boy who gazed placidly back at him. These were his own eyes?
You just want him for your island.
This was way too complicated.
‘It’s a business decision,’ he said flatly, trying to move on. ‘Look, that kiss was an aberration. It has to be. If we let sentiment get in the way it’ll never work. I don’t want to pressure you but I must. It’s not our lives, Lily. It’s the fate of an entire country, possible three.’
‘Right.’
‘It is,’ he said. ‘Will you think about it?’
‘Yes. Just go away.’
Just like that. He had her agreement.
There was nothing else to stay for. Was there?
‘If I agree… ’ she whispered. ‘If I was stupid enough to say yes… Could we still be independent? I do not want to fall for you again.’
‘Did you fall… ?’
‘Shut up,’ she snapped. ‘Fall? Of course I fell. I was an idiot over you. I turned my life into a mess, all because I acted like a lovesick teenager. You kiss me and I turn into that stupid teenager again. If what you say is true… if there really is this huge moral need for me to marry—then we do it as a business deal. Nothing more. I’m not letting you touch me again.’
‘I’d rather not… ’
‘Touch me? Then don’t.’
‘Lily… ’
‘Enough,’ she snapped. ‘I’ll think about it. I’ll do the homework. And then, if I must, I’ll outline conditions. But kissing doesn’t come into it.’
‘That’s a shame,’ he said and tried a smile but she glowered.
‘Don’t you turn that charm on me. I know it. I let you kiss me once to see if what I was afraid of was true, and it is. Now I know where I stand, that’s the end of it. If we have to get married then we do exactly what the law requires and nothing more. If I have to do anything that even remotely resembles conjugal rights… ’
‘Conjugal… ’ he said cautiously and ventured a smile.
She didn’t smile back. ‘Enough,’ she said. ‘Get out. Conjugal or no conjugal, and don’t you push me, Alexandros Mykonis—you know exactly what conjugal means.’
‘Right.’
She was glowering at him. She’d promised to think about it. There was nothing to be gained by staying.
He’d got what he wanted.
Hadn’t he?
She heard his steps fade to nothing. She closed the door and leaned on it, and her whole body shook.
Marriage. Alex.
No and no and no.
Marriage to almost any other man wouldn’t be as bad. Because marriage to Alex… it’d be surrender.
He’d kissed her and she’d surrendered, just as she’d surrendered a year ago. Had she learned nothing?
Alex.
She’d have to do the research.
If she was Mia she’d just walk away.
‘I want to be Mia,’ she whispered, but she knew it wasn’t true.
She wanted… she wanted…
Life.
Her body wanted Alex.
She crossed to the window and looked out. He hadn’t gone far. He was just below her window, talking to Spiros.
Was he making her boss this crazy proposition already? To relocate Spiros’s boatyard to Sappheiros?
Spiros would love it. He and Eleni had come to this country because Spiros dreamed of making his living building the boats he loved, but if he thought he could do it on Sappheiros he’d be there in a minute.
It could happen—if she said yes.
If she promised to marry Alex.
She wanted to lean out of the window, yell at them that this was some crazy proposition by a madman. It was emotional blackmail. She had the right to walk away.
When had she ever had a choice?
She sank onto the floor with Michales and hugged her knees. She felt very tired, alone and afraid.
Alex had kissed her.
And that was what she was most afraid of. He exposed her for what she was. Vulnerable and wanting.
‘Love’s crazy,’ she said. Then, as Michales looked seriously at her, she tugged him onto her knees. ‘It only causes trouble. It caused… you.’
Her son would be heir to the throne of Sappheiros. He’d be the legitimate heir, following in his father’s footsteps.
It was unbelievable. It was… terrifying.
She rose again and went back to the window. Alex was still there. Spiros was smiling—more than smiling. He was looking incredulous. He was glancing up at her window and she drew back into the shadows.
This was worse than blackmail. He’d placed the islanders’ fate in her hands. He’d placed Spiros’s fate in her hands.
What if it was a lie? In this day and age, for a marriage of convenience to be the only path to prevent disaster… It was inconceivable.
But she’d promised to do the research, and if it was true…
This was like jumping off a cliff and not knowing what was below. Only knowing that, whatever was at the end, by the time she landed she’d be going so fast the force could kill her.
CHAPTER SIX
Sappheiros Times headlines
14th August:
‘Royal Scandal—Secret Baby’
‘Queen Uses Sister’s Baby to Keep Throne’
16th August:
‘After the Lies, Prince Regent Is Ruling Crown Prince’
21st August:
‘Islands Revert to Ancient Lineage’
‘Three Principalities From One Kingdom: Islanders’ Joy’
23rd August:
‘DNA Proves Baby Still Heir!Alexandros Confesses Affair’
‘Prince to Wed Queen’s Sister’
‘Prince Declares Lily a Worthy Princess’
‘Wedding By End of Month’
Two weeks. It was only two weeks since she’d been hit with this crazy proposition and it had moved from crazy to terrifying. She was standing at the entrance to the cathedral, ready to be a bride.
Was she out of her mind?
Maybe she was, but she’d done the research. Everything she’d read confirmed and reconfirmed what Alex had told her. Giorgos and his forebears had brought the Diamond Isles to ruin. The only way they could be saved was for them to revert to their original states; for their original ruling families to take their care into their hands. But there was such distrust…
She’d looked at it from every conceivable angle and there was no escape. From the moment she’d seen Spiros’s face, full of incredulous hope, she’d known what she had to do.
Alex had come back the next day and she had her answer ready.
‘Yes,’ she’d told him. ‘For a year. No more. And you touch me and the deal is off. It’s a marriage in name only. Is that clear?’
‘It’s what I want,’ he’d told her. Then, watching her, clearly unable to figure out her response, he’d added, ‘It’s a marriage, Lily. It’s not the gallows you’re walking into.’
‘It’s a trap,’ she’d said. ‘I’m doing it but I don’t have to like it.’
‘It’s not a trap of my setting and I don’t like it either,’ he’d said.
And then he’d left. There was financial chaos in Sappheiros, he’d told her, and he had to sort it out. But the wedding was to take place by the end of the month.
And then the roller coaster began. Or the avalanche. Or whatever it was, but it made her so giddy she thought surely she must still be drifting in and out of the same nightmare world she’d been in before.
Arrangements, arrangements, arrangements. Curt, formal telephone calls with Alex, interspersed by longer calls from officialdom, arranging everything from her bridal gown to a white teething ring for Michales so he could chew his gummy way through the ceremony and still look… bridal?
Yes, the thing was ridiculous, and finally she decided okay, if it was ridiculous she’d simply treat it as a joke gone wrong. She’d close her eyes and get it over with.
And here she was. Her wedding day.
She was about to enter the cathedral where Alexandros had taken his vows two months before. The last time she’d entered this cathedral, she’d slipped in at the rear, wanting to remain anonymous.
Now… Every man and woman was on their feet, waiting for her entrance, and Alex was standing at the altar. The Archbishop was in front and central. Waiting for her.
She was ready to walk down the aisle. Alone.
‘Have Spiros give you away,’ Alex had told her. ‘You can’t do this by yourself. Stefanos and Nikos will attend me. You need bridesmaids. At least have Spiros.’
‘I need no one,’ she’d said. ‘I don’t see why we can’t do this in a government office.’
‘It needs to be done with all the pomp and splendour we can muster,’ he’d told her. ‘The islanders need reassurance that this is real—no one should disbelieve that you’re my wife.’
‘I’m not your wife.’
‘You are,’ he’d said gravely. ‘You’ve agreed.’
‘Until you have the island stable. No more.’
‘Then for the time we have I’ll do you honour.’ In a different tone this might have been a lovely thing to say but it was said in the tone of a man who knew where his duty lay. ‘As the country will do you honour and as you’ll do yourself honour. It’s meant as a reassurance to the country that we can move forward. There’ll be nothing secret or covert about it. You’ll wear full royal regalia, as will I.’
This final decree had left her almost speechless. ‘A real royal wedding?’ She hadn’t attended Mia’s wedding—they’d been so distant by then that Mia would never have thought of inviting her—but she’d seen the media coverage and the thought of doing the same left her cold. ‘You’re telling me what I should wear?’
‘My people tell me there’s no time to make you a completely new gown but if you’ll agree… The royal wedding gowns have been amazing over the centuries, and they’ve been carefully stored and kept, every one. If we can get you here a few days before the wedding, we can get one altered. You could even wear Mia’s.’
And then he’d listened to the silence and conceded, ‘Okay, maybe not Mia’s. But there will be one that fits you. There’s no time to make you one as splendid, and this has to be done right.’
Fine. She was past arguing.
She could do it.
She’d flown here four days ago. The royal assembly line had swung into place the minute she’d arrived. She’d been shown to her own apartment within the palace—an apartment she assumed would be hers for the duration of her marriage. It was opulent to the point of crazy. They’d suggested Michales use the royal nursery and she’d knocked that on the head. There was a cot in the corner of her apartment now; as long as she had Michales she could live anywhere.
So she’d done what was expected, whatever she was told. She’d hardly seen Alexandros and then only when he’d been surrounded by palace officials, lawyers, advisors.
She’d been given her own lawyers. That had surprised her. In all the chaos she’d been given this one sliver of control. The lawyers had been engaged in her name, and they’d been competent and thorough in drawing up a pre-nuptial agreement for her protection. She had no doubt that at the end of her marriage she could walk away—with Michales and with an allowance that made her head swim.
She’d put up a feeble protest about the money but her lawyers had simply ignored it.
‘This pre-nuptial agreement may well become public and the Prince must be seen as doing the right thing by you and his son,’ she’d been told, and once again she’d subsided.
As she’d subsided in everything. At least Michales would always be well provided for.
But now… The organ blared into its triumphant wedding march. Reality was suddenly right here. She’d been pushed off the end of the royal conveyor belt and here she was, about to be married.
She wasn’t… her. She was inside some creature wearing full bridal gear, extravagant to the point of ridiculous, inside a cathedral, about to be married.
It wasn’t Lily who was doing this. It was someone else. Lily was trapped inside.
The doors swung open. At the end of the aisle… Alex.
For two weeks she’d blocked him almost completely from her mind. She was about to be married but this wasn’t about Alex. It wasn’t about either of them.
Maybe her decision to walk down the aisle on her own had been a mistake. She wouldn’t mind Spiros’s arm to lean on right now. She wouldn’t mind anything to lean on.
She needed to start walking.
Alex was waiting.
No. She told herself that sharply. It wasn’t Alex. Just as she was trapped inside someone else, the man at the end of the aisle was a stranger, some prince in his regimentals, waiting to marry a woman in a gown of shimmering beaded lace, with a glorious train trailing twenty feet behind her, with a three-tiered veil attached with a tiara, which had come straight from the royal vaults, the dresser had breathed. Worth a king’s ransom.
Her legs felt frozen.
Do this and get it over with, she told herself.
Everyone was looking at her. Everyone was waiting.
Deep breath. Do this and get on with your life.
She looked along the aisle and Alex was smiling at her.
Her prince.
No. If she thought Prince her feet wouldn’t move.
She had to get a grip on what was reality and what wasn’t. This was Alex smiling at her. The father of her child.
This wedding was a fantasy, but the fantasy had a name.
Alex.
She stepped forward and she looked directly at her waiting bridegroom. She forced herself to smile back.
She could do this.
She could be married to Alex.
He’d suggested she have Spiros give her away. But…
‘No,’ she’d told him. ‘Eleni’s taking care of Michales during the ceremony. That’s all I’ll ask of them. If I ever get married for real I want Spiros to give me away then. But not now. Not for a marriage of convenience.’
So she was alone. He hadn’t realised quite how alone until he saw the cathedral doors swing open. She was standing quite still, quite calm. She looked as determined on this course as she’d been from the moment she’d agreed to his proposal.
‘You know, this could work,’ Nikos said from beside him.
Alex was watching Lily walk steadily towards him, regal and lovely, her head held high, the magnificent gown making her look almost ethereal. He was forcing himself to smile at her as the congregation were clearly expecting him to do—but something inside him was twisting. Hurting.
‘Why the hell wouldn’t it work?’ he growled.
‘The islanders hated the idea of another Mia,’ Nikos whispered. ‘But you just need to look at Lily to see she’s not like her sister. Mia had twelve bridesmaids. Mia had so much bling you couldn’t see her for glitter. Lily’s different. Simple and lovely.’
Simple and lovely… They weren’t words Alex would have thought appropriate for a royal bride.
But they were right.
Lily was not doing this for money. His cheque remained in its pieces—or maybe it had been burned long since—and it had never been replaced. She’d even tried to refuse the allowance his lawyers had written into the pre-nuptial contracts should they ever divorce. ‘You can pay for Michales’s upbringing and nothing else,’ she’d said.
This wedding… this marriage… it seemed she was doing this for Sappheiros. She wanted nothing from it.
He didn’t believe it yet. He couldn’t. The anger and disbelief he’d held ever since he’d learned of Michales’s true parentage still simmered.
Do this and get it over with.
She’d almost reached him. He smiled and she smiled back, but he knew her smile was as forced as his.
This wasn’t the smile he knew from a year ago. This wasn’t the Lily he’d made love to. This was a stranger, a woman coerced.
He had an almost irresistible impulse to take her hand and walk out, right there and then. Before this mock marriage could take place. Not because he didn’t want it. But because… it felt intrinsically wrong.
She’d agreed to this marriage for all the wrong reasons.
He took her hand and it was icy. Unresponsive.
She looked trapped.
She’d trapped herself by bearing his child, he thought grimly. By agreeing to Mia and Giorgos’s great lie.
Forget it, he told himself harshly. Forget the lie. Concentrate on now. Concentrate on the need to be married.
So be it.
Her smile had faded as she’d realised he’d only been smiling for the sake of their audience. He watched a fleeting shadow of something… hurt?… pass over her face.
Why should she be hurt?
This was a formal ceremony and they had to get on.
‘Why not ask Father Antonio to marry you?’ Nikos had asked, and he hadn’t answered. But he knew the answer.
When—if!—he married for real he’d be married by Father Antonio.
This was a royal marriage of convenience. Nothing more.
Lily’s hand stayed in his. They faced the Archbishop together.
‘We are gathered together to join this man and this woman… ’
The formal reception was attended by every person of significance from the Diamond Isles and beyond. In the vast marquee erected in the palace grounds, on the headland overlooking Sappheiros Bay, there were speeches, speeches and more speeches.
This wasn’t the simple celebration of a wedding. This was the celebration of three nations finding independence and hope. The islanders’ joy had little to do with Lily and Alex.
Lily may have provided this outcome but the consensus among the crowd, the media and by the islanders in general, was that she’d done very well for herself. Where was the need for sympathy?
Or even… civility?
As the day wore on Alex was congratulated by islander after islander, but the eyes that watched his bride were guarded.
She was Mia’s sister, and Mia was hated. Like Mia, Lily was suspected as being a woman who’d conned her way into being a part of the royal dynasty.
Alex could do little to protect her. The slurs weren’t overt. They were subtle looks, subtle congratulations with the islanders looking only at him, refusing to meet Lily’s gaze as hands were shaken.
But, he had to admit, despite the slurs, despite the guarded looks, she was behaving… beautifully. She was a lovely bride—serene and almost breathtakingly lovely. But she was so quiet. He’d pulled her veil back from her face for the obligatory kiss-the-bride, but she hadn’t responded as he’d done so and he had the feeling that her veil was down again, metaphorically if not literally.
She hardly spoke through the formal luncheon and the formal reception. She responded civilly to those who spoke to her but her responses were muted.
He’d catch her glance straying over and over to Eleni, who was holding Michales.
She wanted her baby back and her look said she wanted more. She wanted her life back?
The civilities had to be borne—he could no sooner escape than she could. But as the afternoon stretched towards evening he decided enough. A band had started playing and a dance floor was laid across the lawns. The festivities would continue into the small hours. But…
‘You want to escape?’ he asked and saw a flare of hope, unable to be disguised.
‘Can we?’
‘This party will go on without us. I have a place on the other side of the island.’ He’d thought of this yesterday when Nikos had asked about honeymoon plans. They had to be seen as doing something—but this was no time to be away from the island.
He hadn’t wanted to take Lily to his own home but unless they stayed in the palace here there was little choice. And the thought of staying in the palace—obligatory appearance on the balcony—prince kisses bride—left him cold.
‘A place?’ she asked.
‘A house. We can be private there.’
‘What, for a honeymoon?’ It was said wryly. She’d schooled herself to do this, he thought. Maybe if he insisted on his conjugal rights she’d submit as well. To outward appearance she looked beautiful and serene and untroubled. Maybe even submissive?
Maybe submissive was the wrong word. It was definitely the wrong word if this was the Lily he’d met little more than a year ago.
But how well did he know her? Not well, but enough to guess that behind the serenity was quiet desperation.
‘We’re expected to go away for a bit. I can’t go far, but I have a house on the north end of the island.’
‘So… you and me and how many servants?’
‘Just you and me.’ Then, as he saw another fear flare, ‘And Michales,’ he added swiftly.
Her relief was immediate and obvious. ‘I can take him?’
‘Of course.’
She closed her eyes and he thought she was trying desperately to disguise what she was thinking. How fearfully out of control she felt?
It didn’t make sense. Was she afraid of him? Afraid of the royalty bit? Surely not. She was Mia’s sister.
‘We can go now?’ she asked.
‘Yes.’
‘Then what are we waiting for?’
CHAPTER SEVEN
THEY were to depart in a bridal coach. A gold-painted barouche with the Sappheiros coat of arms emblazoned on the panels, with white leather upholstery and white satin cushions—something straight out of Cinderella.
It took only this, Lily thought in disbelief. Alex handed her up into the coach. Attendants arranged her skirts and her train, tucking her in with care.
Alex climbed up and sat beside her.
Eleni handed up Michales.
This had been a crazy day. She was about as far from her comfort zone as she’d ever want to be. But this… this was just plain fantasy. This was every girl’s dream—being whisked off in a golden coach with Prince Charming.
In the fairy tales she’d read, babies weren’t included. But Michales definitely was.
So… Her Prince Charming was sitting beside her. He looked absurdly handsome—regal and tasselled and armed with sword and all the things a Prince Of The Blood should be.
She probably even looked like a princess, she conceded. All white satin and lace and exquisite beading—and there were diamonds in her tiara, for heaven’s sake.