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‘I have thought about that,’ Felicity said, ‘and I’m not looking to change the world. I work in a low-risk birthing centre at the moment—hopefully I’ll come away from Zaraq more informed, which can only be good.’
‘You have an open mind.’ Karim smiled. ‘You would not make a good surgeon.’
‘I’m a good midwife, though,’ Felicity said, and smiled back.
‘Did you tell your mother you were staying here?’
‘No!’ Felicity said. ‘I just told her I had found somewhere.’ She saw his slight frown. ‘She’d only worry more if I told her about the crash.’
‘It must be hard, having a parent who worries so.’
‘It is,’ Felicity admitted, and thanked the waiter as her main course was taken away. ‘And I’m still not sure if I’m doing the right thing, going overseas. My sister hasn’t been well for a couple of years,’ she explained. ‘She’s doing fine now, but there have been a lot of expenses. This way I can really tackle them. Only…’ She hesitated. The practical solution she had come up with for her family had been a sensible one, but there was an emotional side to it too—one she had never shared and certainly not with a stranger.
‘Only…?’ Karim checked.
‘I’m not sure I’m doing the right thing—I’m not sure how they’ll manage. Georgie, my sister, has an eating disorder. She’s doing brilliantly now, though.’ She swallowed uncomfortably, nervous of voicing her innermost fears. ‘I’m just worried that my leaving will set her back. But I don’t really have a choice.’
‘Georgie has,’ Karim said as a white chocolate mousse drizzled in hot raspberry sauce was placed in front of her. ‘She can choose to stay well or not—you cannot do that for her.’
He was right—of course he was right—only it wasn’t so straightforward.
‘You don’t understand…’
‘I can assure you I do!’ Karim responded. ‘I know all there is to know about duty and family. And I know how it feels to be the strong one.’
Karim had declined dessert, and was working his way through a cheese platter. Now her dessert bowl was empty, it merited just a little look from her. He pushed the platter forward and, to her own surprise, instead of refusing and saying she was fine, Felicity took a cracker and helped herself.
‘What about your father?’ Karim asked, watching as the cracker paused midway to her mouth.
‘He died a few years ago.’
‘I’m sorry. That must have been hard for you all.’
She stared across the table at him, stared into black, assessing eyes that gave absolutely nothing away—eyes that judged but were somehow not judging. Instead of taking the easy option and accepting his condolences, after a brief hesitation she responded.
‘Don’t be sorry. He caused this mess. What about your family?’
He gave a brief shrug. ‘There is not much to tell.’
‘Oh?’
He stabbed a piece of cheese with his knife and smeared it on some bread, then took a sliver of quince jelly and topped it with that. He handed it to her and then did the same for himself.
Karim never usually shared—he was generous with gifts, he just never shared what was his.
But tonight he did.
‘I have two brothers. My mother lives here in London—my father is in Zaraq.’
‘Are they divorced?’ For a second she was sure his face tightened, and she thought she must have said the wrong thing. It was an entirely natural assumption—just the wrong one.
‘There is no divorce in Zaraq. My mother, even though she lives in England, gave my father four sons. She deserves his support and respect.’
This was a rather different way of looking at things than Felicity was used to hearing in the maternity wards! But he’d confused her now.
‘Four?’ She crinkled her nose. ‘I thought you said that you had two brothers?’
‘I do.’
She knew then she had definitely said the wrong thing, and immediately apologised. ‘I’m sorry…’
‘You weren’t to know.’ He didn’t elaborate straight away, and neither did Felicity push, but after the longest pause it was Karim who broke the silence. ‘I am the third son. Ahmed was the second. Zaraq is seventy percent desert. Ahmed was into desert racing. He was practising. His vehicle broke down and help did not get there in time.’
‘I’m sorry.’ She said it again and he held her gaze, even opened his mouth for a second to speak, then changed his mind.
Don’t be. He’d been about to repeat her very words. He caused this mess.
There was no bill to summon—just separate rooms to go to.
It was the part of the night she always dreaded.
They walked slowly to the lifts, where a few people were waiting, and Felicity’s heart was hammering in her chest as he stood and faced her.
‘Thank you,’ she attempted, ‘for a wonderful night.’
Karim was about to say that it didn’t have to end there, but he hesitated. She was jangling with nerves, so he decided to soothe her with his mouth; he would play with her hair, his skilled lips moving in…He would let this lift go, Karim decided as the doors pinged open. His lips would meet hers and then he’d take her to his room in the next one!
His mouth was moving in. She was his sweet dessert to linger over—he had waited twelve hours, and he was more than ready to be rewarded for his good behaviour now.
For Felicity, there was just a sliver of indecision. She felt the weight of his lips, the bliss of his mouth on hers, then relaxed and gave in. They were alone at the lifts now, his hands loosely on her hips as his mouth worked on. Fear was replaced by pleasure, and a tiny curl was unfurling in her stomach. An empty lift opened, and she pulled back her head and stared into his eyes—because if he asked to see her again, even though she lived miles from London, even though it would be difficult, maybe she would say yes…
His mouth was on hers again, pulling her closer in, and it felt sublime to kiss him back without thinking. It was tender, but with intent, his tongue sliding between her lips, the thick scent of arousal suddenly closing in as if suffocating her. She jerked away again, because even if it wasn’t tonight with Karim it would be soon. The inevitable day would come where she’d have to tell him she was frigid. She simply couldn’t face it.
She saw the whip of confusion in his eyes as she fled to the lift and he called her name.
‘Just leave me,’ she sobbed, tears blurring her vision as she tried to make out the floor numbers. She ended up pressing more than half the buttons, so that the lift stopped and started almost at every floor. She wasn’t scared that he’d chase her, just mortified by her own fear, choking down sobs as she swiped her card and stumbled into her room.
It was hopeless!
Soon her stunning grey dress lay in a puddle on the floor. Sheathed in lacy underwear, she lay under the sheets, curled into a shameful ball. She was ashamed of her own behaviour, knew she’d made a fool of herself and embarrassed him—he’d been kissing her goodnight, that was all.
It scared her how much she’d enjoyed it.
But she’d been stupid to try, Felicity was fast realising. Stupid to try and pretend that she was normal.
And very foolish to pretend with a man like Karim.
CHAPTER FOUR
STEPPING out onto the freezing grey street and heading for the underground, Felicity just wanted to get home.
Her clothes, as promised, had been laundered and delivered, and looked better than when she had put them on this time yesterday morning. She had set her alarm for six, determined to get out early and not to have to suffer the embarrassment of seeing him at breakfast.
She’d overreacted appallingly—she knew that.
A simple goodnight would have sufficed.
But it wasn’t his kiss that had terrified her, it was the thought of where it might lead—where, with a man like Karim, it would lead. She couldn’t stand the shame of a disappointing end. Better to just walk away now. Karim oozed sexuality—and she could hardly beat him down with a stick, hardly keep chatting her way through dinner only to dodge his caress at the end of the night.
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