The One That I Want

Chapter 3

Laxmi held on for dear life, or more accurately, for the sheer enjoyment of being in Dresden’s arms. All night she’d engaged in sexy fantasies about kissing him. Getting herself hot and stirring up her desire weren’t anywhere on her party agenda, but she hadn’t expected her evening to turn into a night of interesting diversions.

Not only didn’t she expect to run into the missing heir from the Meadows family tree at the bar, not that she’d been on the lookout, but her imagination could have never come up with this end result.

Now she could barely breathe as they devoured each other. Her arms clasped tighter around his shoulders. She sucked in gulps of air while his lips roughly ravished hers.

“You’re freaking delicious,” she whispered. Delicious to taste, see, smell. She inhaled the masculine notes of his cologne.

“Likewise, my knight to the rescue.” His deep, rumbly voice stroked in all the right places.

Hungry and ready, she held on and wrapped her legs around his hips. Her head was buried against his neck, along his cheek, until her mouth reconnected again to his sweet desperation.

The more they kissed, the more she didn’t want it to end. All of this, all of him, felt right and beautiful. She pressed her body against his, holding on, succumbing to his kisses peppering her chest.

Her eyes fluttered open as she sank onto his bed.

He loomed over her, out of breath, wearing his shy smile that had knocked her off balance when she’d first seen him at the bar.

His eyes couldn’t mask his feelings, though. They communicated on full blast with what turned him on, turned him off, or what left him pensive, such as when he was onstage with the rest of the Meadowses. His deep brown eyes surely served as his soul’s windows.

“So what now?” she asked in a deliberate offhand manner.

He sucked on her thumb that still lingered on the cushiony softness of his lips. Her desire shot through her body and pooled between her legs like a hungry snake coiling and ready to be satisfied.

“I don’t do one-night stands.” His hand cupped her breast, taking possession. Under the continuous stroke of his thumb, her sensitive nipple perked against the attention.

“Neither do I.” She licked her lips, hoping for another serving of his tongue to sweep hers into a sexy tango.

“Good. We’re in agreement.” His hand slid up her dress and pulled her thong down her legs before he tossed it aside.

“Just make sure that it’s not a one-nighter.” She eyed the red thong hanging off the lampshade next to the bed. “I’ll definitely need a repeat of you,” she said, almost as if giving herself a necessary reminder.

His hands slid under her body and worked the zipper down her back.

“You’ll have to peel me out of this outfit.” She giggled as she remembered how she’d shimmied in place to get dressed.

“Looking forward to it,” he said. His fingers teased her skin as he unwrapped the dress from around her body.

Goose bumps prickled her arms with anticipation and as reward for the casual brush of his hands around her waist and along her hips.

Strong, yet gentle, his fingertip traced symbols of infinity along her flesh. She hoped he never stopped. Her moans partnered with her body, which was writhing under the attention. Pleasurable shivers shimmied through her.

“Getting you out of my system may take a little while.” Laxmi couldn’t help confessing her inner thoughts to this man.

“Same here.” He kissed the edge of her shoulder where a monarch-butterfly tattoo imprinted her skin. The colorful charm served her well as a reminder of having faith after her darkest days.

“Wasn’t supposed to happen this way,” she whispered, giving voice to the argument within her.

His focused expression softened with a hint of a smile. Maybe he agreed.

The smile turned her on. Discovering every feature excited her. She traced a line from his forehead over his nose and the spread of his nostrils. A soft sweep of his lips with her thumb paid homage to a key feature she’d instantly fallen for earlier that evening.

He unbuttoned his shirt, but she couldn’t stay patient for his intentional performance of slowly undressing. While he dealt with that, she unfastened his pants and assisted him out of them with such vigor that they collapsed into each other’s arms, both laughing heartily.

Once they’d restored order with her blushing and him clearing his throat, she had to admit to wanting all the time to look at his naked body.

“Maybe we should exchange some sort of pleasantries.”

“Now?” Laxmi couldn’t curb the fit of giggles as Dresden leaned against the wall with too much casualness. She didn’t want to deal with any speed bumps slowing the momentum of a spectacular nightcap.

He kissed her pout until her lips relaxed and welcomed his mouth and the bold stroke of his tongue. Damn, he can kiss. She wrapped her legs around him to wipe out any gaps between them.

“You know, to make this less of a booty call.” He nuzzled her neckline, tracing the curve to her shoulders.

“Aw, you’re sweet,” she teased. “Okay, then let’s go with word association. You get five words and I get five. One-word questions and answers.” She grasped his firm behind in her hands and stroked the thick hardness of muscle.

“Home?” he asked through clenched teeth to begin the game.

“Brooklyn.” Her hands stroked upward along the contour of his back. “Your mom’s basement?”

He laughed and handily took possession of her hands above her head. “Heck no. And that’s three words.” He punished her with a series of wet kisses around her nipple. “Canada?” he prompted. Meanwhile he continued teasing the valley between her breasts.

She arched up for more of his tongue’s wickedness. “Doable.” Talking and moaning almost made her words unintelligible. She could barely think. “Purse,” she hissed.

“It’s my turn. Gosh, you cheat.” He nuzzled her earlobe, which might as well be a turn-up-the-dial on the heat in her.

“Purse,” she repeated with a gasp.

“Red.”

“No.” She pointed to the tiny accessory abandoned on the hotel desk.

He shook his head, looking confused.

She giggled. “I meant for you to hand me my purse. Condoms.”

“Smart.” He nodded.

“They are in my purse.” She couldn’t stop laughing at him.

“I take it we’re done with the games.” He handed her the small red purse.

“Pretty much.” She pulled out the condom and ripped the packet apart.

“I’ll do it. You may tip me over before I’m ready.” He plucked the condom from her fingers.

* * *

Dresden the history professor and Dresden the one-night-stand lover boy didn’t compute. But this onetime scenario happened when he tucked logic away like a pesky friend.

From his departure from the party to the arrival at this hotel room with Laxmi, he’d sailed through his experiences with the rush of adrenaline going through his veins. He was open to every sensation and Laxmi delivered, keeping all his senses on high alert.

Yet he regretted nothing, instead diving into the deep end and enjoying whatever happened between in this moment. He had no misguided supposition that there would an episodic drama after this night. She’d made it clear that she was operating on satisfying a whim. And he had no desire to ignite anything that asked for commitment or long term.

His plate was pretty full with the Meadowses.

And he wanted to forget them, if only for a little while.

* * *

Laxmi watched him prep himself.

Raw hunger fueled her desire. The man certainly could send her into a swoon. He was simply beautiful. The naked statues of male Greek gods in the museums all over the world had nothing on him. While those physiques were born of a sculptor’s imagination, this man was blessed with natural strength, power and lean muscular build.

The lights hadn’t been dimmed. A consideration she appreciated for the juicy privilege of watching him walk toward her. No shadowy darkness shielded him from her view. Smooth skin, rich with color, stoked her desire to touch him. An appetite for him to pleasure her grew with a deep gnawing as if it was an actual hunger pang craving nourishment.

No other way to admit that she’d fallen under his spell, even if he hadn’t cast one. His loner personality tugged at her interest. His body tugged on a lot more. She was so wet as her gaze lapped him up to feed her soul.

She shifted her eyes from his erection to look in his eyes. Her cheeks remained warm when she saw that he was aware of her appreciation.

“I don’t want you to think that I’m rushing things.” His tone questioned her.

She shook her head. If he knew of her turmoil, the giddy sensation of being twirled around a room and let go, he might not believe her. But she loved the free fall from the dizzying height of her current situation. Maybe that need to take risks continued to guide her, pushing her toward independence and challenging her to step out of her comfort zone. Being around Dresden shook her world in a good way. He wasn’t the average man. This wasn’t the average hookup.

“Good.” His mouth closed over a nipple and his tongue played with the taut nub. Then his head popped up. “’Cause I’m having the time of my life with you.”

Laxmi softly clasped his head between her hands and pulled him to her mouth for a kiss. His consideration touched her. She tried not to jump ahead and contemplate when they’d have to go their separate ways. She was adult enough to know that any promises made to each other in the heat of the moment didn’t mean they would be honored. After all, an internationally recognized border stood between them.

It is a fact of life. She couldn’t open her heart for a what-if moment. Stay focused. Her mission was to prove that she could climb back to the successful side of the entertainment world after a failed singing career. She’d already placed hazard warnings around her heart for any failed attempts at true love.

This night could never be repeated, despite how much she wanted another chance to feel wanted and desired by a real man.

Despite the practical advisory, the reality carried a sting.

“Don’t get quiet on me,” he whispered with his forehead pressed against hers.

“Does this look quiet to you?” She leaned back on her elbows.

He growled, deep and guttural. They were done talking.

She barely had time to grab hold of him as he scooped her up and brought their hips for a momentous meet-up. She welcomed all of him, grinding against his pelvis.

They moved as one, neither wanting to let go. From the bed, to the floor, to the chair, to the wall, Laxmi crawled, writhed and rolled around with Dresden deep within her.

Life felt good.

He felt good.

Her back stayed pressed against the cold, hard bedroom wall, to keep her upright, but also to keep her in place for Dresden’s rhythmic thrusts.

She kept her eyes closed. Listening to his grunts ramped up her need for him to fill her even more. Over and over again.

“Hold on.” His command sounded like a voice-over for the unfolding action.

She obeyed without needing any prompt. Her cheek pressed against the soft waves of his hair. She held on so tight that she was sure her cheek would show the imprint of his hair.

Reading her readiness, he slowed, sliding into her with deliberate pressure and pulling out for her to enjoy every glorious part. At the peak, she let go and let her body release, pulsate until she was done.

Gripping his shoulders, she stayed perched around his hips. As he picked up the pace to thrust into her, he came hard. And she thanked her luck that she’d met this wonderful man tonight.

They finally had touched down and coasted back to reality. Only their uneven breaths added sound to the silence. Within each other’s embrace, they ushered in a calm, reflective mood after their steamy, passionate union.

“Whew,” Laxmi said to ward off the onset of nerves. “I would say let’s go for round two, but a girl’s got a business to run.” She slid along the wall to free herself and her mind from Dresden’s proximity.

“And I’ve got a plane to catch in a few hours.” He looked at his watch and didn’t look her way again.

“I’ll just step into the bathroom.” Laxmi straightened her clothes and headed for the door.

* * *

Dresden released a breath when the bathroom door closed. If he was hooked up to diagnostic machines, the readout would be haphazard. Emotions and hard thinking battled for his mind’s forefront.

Never having been high, he imagined this floating sensation and craving for more must come pretty close. But the changes in him weren’t only physical. That scared him. The shift toward wanting Laxmi, wanting to be friends, wanting more than that, was too swift. He didn’t operate on impulse. Well, up to a few minutes ago, he’d have made that claim.

But her kick-ass style and fearless approach stirred desire. He wanted the time to get to know her. And he hoped that she’d let him convince her that he was worth the effort.

* * *

Behind the closed door, in much-needed privacy, she cleaned up while her mind scrolled through a panicked stream of thoughts. A ragged edge of self-doubt gnawed at her confidence. If she hadn’t pushed her way into Dresden’s space, would he have been interested? She knew the answer, as she leaned in to the mirror, peering at her reflection as if it was an out-of-body experience. So far tonight, she had walked on the wild side, but was still uncertain about how the final credits would roll. Unplanned moments had a tendency to go haywire. Right now, her emotions were running ahead of her logic, looking to escape.

Was she the bad guy? Cut and run and never look back. Or could she play the good girl? Diplomatic and vague, but still run. Her past was her being the naive woman hanging on too long to a bad apple. She’d played at being cavalier with Dresden. But the plan had backfired. She was far from unaffected by Dresden. Too dangerous to her willpower. A fast retreat was necessary.

Laxmi reapplied her lipstick, dabbed at the sheen on her forehead and smoothed her hair back into place, as much as possible. A twist here and a turn there, she finished the inspection on her clothes. Her thong. Still on the lampshade. Time to head back out there and act like she wasn’t a case of nerves.

No matter how she felt, she didn’t wish him to be constrained by her insecurities. Keep things simple and not emo-girl whiny. Taking deep breaths in and out, Laxmi was ready to play the role of independent, emotionally detached young woman.

At first she didn’t see or hear him when she emerged from the bathroom. Even if he was inclined, there weren’t too many places to jump out and scare her. Anyway, she hurried over to the side table and grabbed her underwear. She’d just pulled her dress down when the sound of a key card activating the door stopped her plan to search for him behind the thick drapes.

“I bought a couple sodas.” He handed her a cold Coke. His eyes shifted from around the room to her outstretched hand, but never to her face.

Was he feeling regret? Shame? Or was he in need of closure?

“Thanks. That’s thoughtful.” She didn’t drink sodas, but the correction didn’t matter. Her fingers brushed along his—deliberate on her part. She wanted contact and a signal that nothing would be awkward. Still he didn’t bring his gaze back to her. Things would be awkward.

“Did you need anything else?” He motioned with his chin toward the bathroom.

“I’m good.” Why did he have to look all pulled together? Meanwhile, a few minutes ago, her hair had sported a bad case of bed-head. Smeared lipstick had given her the clown-mouth effect. And her skin had appeared dewy from the naturally sweaty workout.

Not fair.

Laxmi grabbed her keys and pocketbook. She took a pass on offering her hand for a shake or tiptoeing to meet his lips for a kiss. Instead she said, “Hope everything works out for you. If you’re ever in the city, you have my card.”

She hurriedly opened the door and stepped into the hallway, praying it would quickly swing shut. She sounded like a handyman hoping for a call back after tackling a problem.

“Wait. I’ll walk with you.”

“Not necessary.” She sped up her retreat to the elevator. “I’m in a rush.”

His unhurried footsteps followed her quick strides. She turned the corner to the bank of elevators, ready to summon one. The longer she stayed in this building, the more trapped she felt. Fresh air would help a lot. She waited with a small huddle of hotel guests, hoping that the elevator arrived before Dresden.

But he appeared around the corner, still unhurried, not breathing as if he had to catch up to the finish line, unlike her heaving chest. Maybe he recognized the lack of privacy, because he said nothing, his face a stoic mask. Instead he stood next to her, joining everyone’s stance to stare at the numbers above the elevator as it moved up or down.

Finally a chime behind them indicated a door would open. Laxmi waited for the family of four to board the space before she stepped in and faced front, while Dresden followed suit.

The other guests continued with their conversation, which helped to make the ride down slightly bearable.

“You really didn’t have to come with me,” she whispered.

“You’ve made that clear.”

He sounded annoyed.

The door opened and Laxmi almost tumbled out, glad to be free from the confining space. Now that the exit wasn’t far from where she stood, her equilibrium righted to stiffen her spine.

“Why are you running?” His attention stayed with the flow of foot traffic coming and going through the entrance.

“I’m not. It’s just time for me to go.” She didn’t slow down as she headed through the doors and requested her car.

“And I thought that I was the one to run.” He barely smiled at his joke.

“If I stay, we’d be breaking our pact to remain uninvolved. This wasn’t supposed to happen. I came to a birthday party to hang out with my friend and catch up on our years apart while eating birthday cake. And you were going to be introduced to Grace’s circle.” She stepped off the curb to head for her car that had pulled up. “We were the anomaly of the evening.”

“I have no complaints.” He remained on the curb.

She looked over the top of the car at him. “Neither do I.”

“Well, break the rule. Let’s do this.” His suggestion touched her like the gentleness of his hand cupping her face.

She looked up at the dark night, unable to see any stars. Bright city lights illuminated the steep heights of the buildings. Once upon a time, she had broken lots of rules, done things her way, and had a lot to be sorry for in the process.

Dresden hadn’t moved or changed his expression. Still the handsome guy who’d caught her eye. Did he understand the consequences of tossing out that temptation as a finale for the night?

“Let’s end on a high note.” She got into her car before he responded and before she changed her mind.

Her passenger door opened. Dresden leaned in. “Maybe we’re more alike than you think. And—”

“No.” She shook her head for added emphasis. “You’re in Canada. I’m in New York.”

“There’s such a thing called planes.”

“I’m in entertainment—it’s a hustle. There’s no time for dating or thinking about you. I go where the business takes me. I can barely look after me. I don’t want—”

“I don’t need to be looked after. And life is a hustle that we don’t always get right.”

Laxmi stared straight ahead. She had to erase his words of hope, his expectant look, the memory of what that mouth had delivered on her body. She bit her lip to add a stinging reminder to get it together.

“I don’t have what you’re looking for. I’m not the girlfriend who could be counted on to be reliable or dependable.” Laxmi revved the engine. “But one day you will find that special someone because you’re a nice guy and you’ll see that this wasn’t it.”

“I’ll let you go...for now.” He stepped back and closed the car door.

Laxmi snapped on her seat belt, glanced into the side mirror for oncoming traffic and pushed down on the gas. She needed the city’s frenetic driving scene to harness her attention.

For now.

For now?

Chapter 4

Monday promised to feel like the worst hangover Laxmi had ever had without alcohol involved. Insomnia hit two nights in a row, marching in like a tuba player blowing his way into a library. Wide-awake and consumed with Dresden aptly described those sleepless hours. Dreams of him lingered, infusing her thoughts with sexy images of him and playing X-rated loops of him satisfying her. Even now her cheeks warmed under the memory of his actions and her reactions.