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His own father had destroyed his beautiful Creole mother. Now the promises he’d made Danica lay shattered on the ground. To keep his hands out of trouble, he stuffed them in his pockets. His gaze was not as easy to control. Tall and lean, she was so much stronger than his mother.
At least he hadn’t brought children into this mess.
Without a word, she stared at him. Guilt and shame were heavy burdens to carry. Lowering his head, he took deep breaths. In prison, he’d learned really quickly to avoid eye contact, and it was hard to change the habit.
Officer Bolton joined them. “Call just came across the radio. During a drug bust on the edge of the county, they got a surprise in the basement. They found a caged bear and an old black jaguar. The cat has a bad leg. There was talk of putting the animals down. I told them I was with you, and we could transport the animals here. I already called Dr. Ortiz to meet us there.” He smiled at Reid. “Initiation by fire. It looks like you’re jumping into the deep end today.”
Reid looked at his wife. No, he couldn’t think of her in those terms. It was too dangerous to get wrapped up in what could have been. Her hard glare felt like heat burning his skin, starting at his neck and traveling down.
Bolton slapped him on the back, causing him to jerk around. The officer laughed. “You go in the truck with Danica. She’ll update you. I’ll wait for you to gather your things, and you can follow me.” With a big smile, he headed to his patrol car. “Welcome to the world of rescue.”
“Come on, Mr. McAllister.” She didn’t wait for him. “I need to get the supplies. Have you moved large sedated animals before?”
He followed. “A few times, Mrs. McAllister.”
She stopped in front of him, and he bumped into her back. His hands went to her arms to prevent her from falling forward. He shouldn’t have been so close. In that instant, he reacted as if she was still his. He closed his eyes and inhaled her scent, savoring the shape of her arms under his hands.
With a twist, she was out of his reach. Her breathing made her shoulders rise and fall in quick succession. “I never changed my name. I’m a Bergmann, and we don’t forget. And we sure don’t forgive easily. So, you will call me Ms. Bergmann. No one knows I married you, and it will stay that way.”
With the precision of a general, she turned and marched to the small house. He followed. He had a feeling he would follow her to his death if she let him.
Sometimes when something was broken, fixing it wasn’t an option. The best a person could do was throw it away and move on. God, is this where You wanted me, or am I being a stubborn fool?
Chapter Two
The patrol car slowed down in what looked to be the middle of nowhere, surrounded by nothing. Perfect place for activities that needed to be hidden from the law. Except they found this one.
“Is it safe for you to be out here?” He didn’t like the idea of her being around these kinds of lowlifes, the kind that made up his family.
With a quick glare, she gave him his answer loud and clear. It left a bitter burn in his gut to see the hostility coming from eyes that used to look on him with love.
They followed the county car down a narrow, overgrown dirt road. It was another five or six miles deep into the wooded ranch before they came up to a fortress-like structure. Who would want a home that looked like a prison on the outside?
Once through the gate, a building that looked more like a Malibu beach house appeared before them. Several different types of law enforcement were coming in and out of the house. Boxes and computers were being loaded into vans.
Cold sweat broke out over Reid’s entire body, and his skin shrunk around his bones. Three breaths in and one long exhale helped a little. They were not here for him. They weren’t taking him back to the small windowless concrete cell. He was free and not doing anything that would put him back there.
“Reid? Are you okay?” Hearing her voice calmed him better than all his coping techniques and self-induced pep talks.
Trying to give her a reassuring smile, he nodded. “Just a few too many uniforms with weapons for my peace of mind.”
Officer Bolton tapped her window and waited for her to roll it down. “Dr. Ortiz is right behind us. I’ll find out the location of the animals so you can park the trailer close.”
She opened the door. “I’ll come with you. I have a couple of questions before we enter the area with the jaguar and bear.” Over her shoulder, she talked to Reid. “Wait here. When I get the information, can you move the trailer up to the area we’ll be exiting with the animals?”
With a nod, he got out of the truck and moved to the driver’s side. A few of the officers glanced at him. He kept his head down and counted his breaths.
The ex-con label would be attached to him until the day he died and beyond. He gritted his teeth. It would be part of his life forever now, so he’d better get used to it.
Nothing new. Every male in his family carried the stigma. Being the only one to finish high school hadn’t saved him from his family tradition. He popped his knuckles. Could they tell by looking at him?
Before he hid inside the cab, a large white truck with several compartments in the back pulled up next to him. A tall Hispanic woman stepped out. She came straight to Reid with an inviting grin and her hand out. Reid had to wonder if she bleached her teeth or if they were naturally so white and perfect.
“Hi, I’m Sandra Ortiz. I’m Danica’s on-call veterinarian. Since I’ve never met you, I’m hoping she finally found a vet tech with an animal husbandry degree.”
“Reid McAllister. Yes, I’m her new vet tech. For now.”
The woman’s smile went bigger as they shook hands. “Good, good. I told her not to worry. God would provide.”
Reid wasn’t sure if it was God or his selfish desire, but he didn’t say anything.
“Hey, Sandy.” Danica returned and gave the other woman a quick hug. “Seems we have a full-grown male jaguar and a very young bear cub in the basement.”
With quick, efficient motions, the vet started pulling equipment from the back of her truck. “Congratulations on the new vet tech. I’ll call Gloria and let her know to close the search.”
“Oh, no. Don’t do that. Reid is one of James’s parolees. He’s here temporarily, so the faster I can get someone in full-time the better.”
Reid saw it. The friendliness turned to suspicion the second the doctor learned she was talking with a convicted criminal. He needed to get used to it.
Every time he started over, people would know, and he’d be an ex-con for the rest of his life. An ex-con without a home or family.
* * *
Danica loaded the rifle with the dart Dr. Ortiz had prepared, taking careful aim at the black jaguar as it paced and growled in the small enclosure. There were white patches of hair sprinkled over his coat, indications of old wounds and injuries.
They would have to move fast once she shot him. Anger welled up at the humans who had caged this beautiful wild animal and removed his front claws. His fangs were coated with gold, and a gaudy diamond collar was too snug around his neck. One of his hind legs was not bearing weight.
They’d already removed the young bear cub. She was small enough for Reid to carry her to the large crate secured in the trailer. He now hung back from the other men. Backed into a dark corner, much like the young bear they’d found huddled in her cage.
“Is she going to shoot the cat through the bars of the cage?” She couldn’t see who Reid asked, but her husband’s low voice caressed her skin.
It had taken her almost two years to get him out of her mind. She stopped missing him four years ago, but it seemed as if parts of her heart had already forgotten she didn’t love him anymore.
She sighed. “Some of us are working over here if you don’t mind. The big guy is already scared, and I want to make him as comfortable as possible.” Bringing the rifle back to her shoulder, she cast the big cat in her sight. As soon as she pulled the trigger, the jaguar snapped at the spot she hit on his rump. It didn’t take him long to go down.
“We need to move fast.”
Reid didn’t hesitate a minute. He attacked each of the steps like a pro. Dr. Ortiz was working right alongside him as he finished securing a cloth over the animal’s eyes to keep the cat calm when he woke. With James and a couple other men, they lifted the cat onto a long board and carried him out.
The entire time, Reid talked in a quiet voice to the animal while they moved him. The same voice that calmed her when she was upset or stressed.
First thing in the morning, she would start calling her contacts and get the application to the National Wildlife Federation turned in ASAP. She needed to get Reid out of her life, the sooner, the better.
With the animals secured, Reid disappeared inside the truck as she went to touch base with the lead officer.
Unfortunately, he was waiting for her with three more crates. The day was not quite over. She would be leaving with more than the two in the trailer. “The animals are secured. The basement is all yours. What do you have there?”
“Goats. Six kids. We crated them so you could load them quickly.” He smiled as if they were a gift.
James came up behind her and touched her arm. “I’ll help you with these. I know time is sensitive.” He picked up the one closest to him, and the two goats inside started bleating.
Reid joined them. “Is everything okay?” He kept his gaze on her, ignoring the FBI agent.
“Seems as if we have a few more additions to our family. Baby goats.” She looked from the FBI agent Reid was avoiding to the crated goats. “Reid, place them in the bed of the truck. There are bungees in the back seat.”
With a quick nod, he went to work.
A short time later she drove over the hills, back to her struggling sanctuary, with six baby goats, a black bear cub, an old jaguar and one secret husband in tow.
How had this become her life?
God, I’m working on turning this worry over to You, but right now I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed. Lord, please show me what to do!
“Did you say something?” Reid kept looking over his shoulder, to the cargo they were hauling.
She didn’t think she said anything out loud. Great. Now she was mumbling to herself. “Just having a conversation with God. The babies are safe. No one will get out.”
“What about the jaguar? The tranquilizer will wear off soon.” He looked back again, his brow furrowed.
“Reid, this isn’t my first rodeo. I know what I’m doing. We might have to sedate the big guy again before we can unload him. I’ve gotten good at working with wild animals, and I know how unpredictable they can be. I promise I’ve got this under control.”
“The bear looks too young to be away from her mother. Will you have to hand-raise her?”
“Yes, but we’ll keep hands off as much as possible. She’ll be assigned a number. Once she’s old enough, we’ll either release her into the wild or the bear section on the ranch. You were great, by the way. Some people have a hard time working with the big animals, even when they’re out.”
“I learned to work fast while staying calm. It’s the best way to survive when you have a two-thousand-pound bull that needs medical attention. I’ve never been this close to a big cat. He’s stunning.”
“He’s a beauty.” This didn’t seem real. She was sitting with the man she married six years ago, talking as if he hadn’t walked out on her and their daughters. She glanced at him. He was checking the trailer again. “Why did you move close to my hometown? Did you know I was living here?”
“You were always close to your family, and I couldn’t imagine you being away from your twin sister for too long. When we talked about the future, it involved Clear Water and your family. So even if you hadn’t moved back home, I knew you would be around. I meant it when I said I hadn’t planned on blindsiding you like this.” He turned to face her. His gray-green eyes scanned her face before coming back to meet her gaze.
With a sharp breath, she turned her focus on the rural highway. Just because Reid’s eyes still did things to her insides didn’t mean it was wise to trust him. That was more evidence that she needed to be wary and keep her distance.
“But why even come back to the Hill Country? Why not New Orleans or Houston? Don’t you have family in both of those places?” It would have been so much better if he stayed away. She had gotten good at the out-of-sight-out-of-mind game she played with herself.
“None that I want to claim. There’s nothing in Houston or New Orleans for me other than trouble. While in prison, I met Ray Martinez. His church had a prison ministry and organized Bible studies. He changed my life. Well, God used him to change me.”
Her jaw started to hurt, making her take a deep breath to relax. The resentment burning in her gut would turn toxic if she allowed it to fester. “I tried to get you to church the whole time we were dating. You were always too busy.” Sarcasm might not be the best option, but it made her feel better. “So, you found God in prison, and now you want to right all your wrongs?”
“It’s not that easy.”
He was fortunate she didn’t throw things at him. Hand over hand, she turned off the highway onto the farm-to-market road that led to the sanctuary. Silence lingered, and she let it hang between them. She needed to focus on the hurt and abused animals and her daughters. She had to figure out what would be best for them.
Pulling up to the large gate, she rolled down her window. The Texas heat hit her. It felt good in contrast with the coldness of the cab. Leaning out the window, she punched in the code for the gate. The gate paused halfway. She hit the box, and it started moving again. She needed someone to look at the motor. Maybe her baby sister would do it for free.
Dr. Ortiz followed along with Reid’s parole officer. Her long-lost husband had a parole officer. There was no reason for him to know about the twins, and her innocent girls didn’t have to find out their father was a convict.
Once parked, they all got out and sedated the cat again. As a team, they moved fast to get the cat in an exam room so Sandy could check him. There was an old break in his hind leg that they wouldn’t be able to correct. Bruises and small cuts covered his body. While the vet and Danica tended to the big guy, Reid stayed at the jaguar’s head the whole time, keeping him calm and watching for signs of stress.
Removing the gold caps from the deadly fangs, Sandy shook her head. “I just don’t understand people. Taking a beautiful animal and turning him into a freak show for their warped entertainment.”
Lowering the table, they slid him into an enormous wooden crate. As Danica closed the door, the cat lashed out and caught the edge of Reid’s hand with its teeth.
Once Danica secured the latch, she grabbed his hand. Without asking, she pulled him to the sink. “I don’t think it needs stitches.” She glanced at Dr. Ortiz. “What do you think?”
Reid tensed under her touch as they crowded around his minuscule injury. She glanced up and found him staring off at the crated cat. “Are you okay?”
He jerked his chin. “I’ve had much worse.”
Sandy went to the cabinets and came back with ointments and bandages. “It’s not deep. I think you’ll just need to keep it clean and bandaged for a few days.”
“After checking the cub, we’ll need to fill out an incident report.” Danica kept her head down.
Both women worked on his hand. At one point, he tried to pull back. His free hand rubbed his forehead. “It was my fault. You don’t need to write him up. He was scared, and we all have the instinct to protect ourselves.”
He didn’t flinch once while they worked on the cut. “The cat’s not going to get in trouble.” She carefully added the small metal clip to hold the wrap in place. “But I do have to write up the incident. Not following the rules is what gets us in trouble. Hiding the truth doesn’t help anyone.” Her voice grew a little stronger than it needed to be.
Sandy gave Reid a hard look. “We can’t put the refuge at risk because of a simple documentation you don’t want to take the time to fill out.”
Reid rolled his neck and looked down, a frown on his face. This wasn’t Sandy’s fight, so Danica wasn’t sure what happened to the vet’s usual friendly manner. Possibly she was having a tough day. Danica could relate to that. Instead of wasting time trying to figure out other people’s problems, she went to the baby bear.
The small black bear looked healthy, except for being a little underweight and hungry. Sandy filled out the health form. “He’ll need to be hand-fed for now.”
The little bear seemed to have bonded with Reid, wanting to cling to him. Danica went into the kitchen area to fix her a bottle. Sandy followed her.
“I need to go. I’ll take the new guy with me and drop him off wherever he belongs. Or I could take him to Bobby.”
“He’s fine. It’s been a while since we had a baby of this type, so I need Reid to help prep the enclosure.”
“I don’t think that’s wise. I’d stay, but I need to finish my rounds. He’s not staying here, is he?” Disgust dripped from each word.
Danica stopped mixing the formula and looked at Sandy. “No, he has a job as a wrangler at the Hausman ranch. What’s wrong with you? We use parolees all the time.”
“All the others stayed with Bobby to get their hours. Are you so naive that you don’t worry about being alone with an ex-con? Worse, as a vet tech he has access to everything in the office and will be spending most of his time with you. Alone. You just met him today. Do you even know what he did?” Her friend and vet looked more vexed than she had ever seen. She stood with her arms crossed.
“James Bolton is his parole officer. He wouldn’t bring a dangerous convict out here. The charge was transporting drugs.”
Sandy’s eyes went wide. “You have a drug dealer in here. Do you realize some of the drugs kept here have high street value?”
Danica tried to stop the eye roll, but she wasn’t sure she was entirely successful. Sandy didn’t know how well she knew Reid. “I’m not stupid enough to trust him. Yes, he’s an ex-con, and yes, I have everything of value locked away. I need his expertise to get my paperwork finished and filed. As soon as you find me a vet tech with the right degree, he’s gone.” Thrusting her hip out, she pointed to her walkie-talkie. “Bobby is one click away.”
Reid cleared his throat from the doorway. The cub curled in his arms, lying against his chest, sound asleep. Her traitorous heart thought of him holding their daughters. Heat caused her skin to burn. “Reid—”
“A girl named Sarah is here. She said to let you know she’s feeding the orphaned bats.” His eyes looked more gray than green before he returned to the other room.
Sandy stepped in front of Danica as she started following Reid. “Now, don’t go feeling sorry for him. He’s a criminal. You know I’ve always been uncomfortable with having the parolees out here.”
The need to apologize ate at her. “He’s a human who is trying to do the right thing.”
“You’ve known him one day. That man is not one of your rescue projects. He’s a grown adult that knows right from wrong, and he chose wrong.”
“You don’t know him.”
“Neither do you. Unfortunately, I do know men like him. He’ll get what he wants and leave you smashed and bleeding. When he’s taken everything he needs, he’ll walk out without a backward glance.” Sandy reached out and took the bottle from her. “Trust me. I know what I’m talking about. I’ll get this to Sarah. When I leave, I’ll take the con with me.”
Danica took the bottle back. “Thank you for the warning, but I’ve got this. You can go. I’ll have Bobby take Reid back to the Hausman Ranch. By the way, he has a name. Reid. And just like my animals, he deserves to be treated with respect. Okay?”
She sighed. “You sure you got this?”
“Yes.” She laid her hand on Sandy’s arm. “Thank you for caring, but I know what I’m doing.”
With a grunt, Sandy shook her head. “Those words almost guarantee impending doom.”
Going into the other room, they found Reid in the rocking chair. The cub was still asleep curled up in his arms. Danica grabbed the long leather gloves and prepared to feed the new baby. Sandy glared at Reid. “I’ll be back out tomorrow to do a follow-up. Will you be back?”
He nodded. “I have the early shift at the ranch, so I’ll be here at two o’clock.”
The vet turned to Danica. “I’ll be here at two. We can evaluate if the big guy is ready for release and do a follow-up with the little one.” With one last hostile stare at Reid, Sandy left.
Danica sighed and reached for the bear. The smell of the formula in the bottle had her awake and making noises. She couldn’t help but laugh at her antics. “Poor baby is hungry.”
A loud rumble came from Reid’s stomach. She raised a brow. “Are you needing to be fed, too? When did you eat last?”
His golden tan skin flushed a bit. He shook his head and kept his eyes focused on the bear.
“Reid. When did you eat last?”
He shrugged. “We had an early breakfast at the ranch.”
Knowing ranch life, that would have been before sunup. “It’s after four! Why didn’t you say something?” The bear finished the last of the mixture.
“Sorry. Making my own decisions still feels odd. After six years, I got used to others telling me what to do and when to do it. Some habits are hard to shake.”
That made her heart break a little. She remembered the carefree young man who loved being outdoors, riding bulls, drawing and poetry. She fell so hard in love with him. But like Sandy said, she didn’t know this Reid.
She wanted to know why he did it. Why Reid gave up on them so quickly. If they had worked hard, they could have made it. He hadn’t had enough faith in them. “I have some sandwich stuff in the refrigerator.”
The bear moved and crawled up his leg, trying to get under his shirt. “Are you going to give her a new name? Her collar said Slasher.” He gently pulled her out and hugged the bear close. “I don’t like that name.”
“With the intent to keep them wild, we have a policy not to humanize them. She’ll be assigned a number for her file, but no name. You shouldn’t hold her so much.”
“Babies need to be held. So she’ll get a number? Will she spend the night in the crate?”
Taking the cub out of his arms, she put her back into the wooden structure. They placed blankets and a floppy stuffed bear for her to cuddle. “After I feed you, we can clean and prep a large enclosure we made a couple of years ago for two orphaned bears. She’ll live there until we can release her in the bear habitat. If we do this right, she could be a candidate for release into the wild. We don’t want her to rely on humans too much.”
With the baby tucked away, she went to the central building. One of the volunteer college students was doing homework while covering their twenty-four-hour hotline. “Hi, Diego. This is Reid McAllister. He’s our new vet tech.” The men shook hands. “Is Sarah still here?”
“She was bathing the bats a minute ago.”
She introduced Reid to Sarah and the orphaned bats, then headed to the kitchen. Digging in the refrigerator she found enough supplies to make two sandwiches. They finished their meal in silence.
There were a hundred ways to start a conversation with her secret husband, but she needed to keep it professional until he left for good. With empty plates in the sink, they went outside. They got in her favorite ATV, a double-seated four-wheeler that looked like a golf cart on steroids. The large enclosure was deep in the ranch.
“What happened?” Reid pointed to the old homestead as they passed it, a ranch house built in 1918.
“When Linda, the owner, was moved to full-time care, the house caught fire. It was small, and it just took out the back room, but it did enough damage that it would take lots of money to restore it. It had been her plan that the caretaker of the sanctuary would live there.”