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The church service was short and the burial even shorter. As the priest said his parting words she stepped forward to throw down a bunch of daisies she had picked this morning from the fields at the back of the house and whispered, ‘I’m sorry, Mother, but you have to rest in peace and leave me alone now. I have my own life to live.’ Betsy stayed until the last and watched as her neighbours and the other villagers filed out of the church gate, down the steep steps until she was on her own. She felt a warm hand on her shoulder and turned to see Joss standing behind her.
‘Come on, Miss Betsy, there is nothing more you can do now.’
She smiled at him and nodded. ‘I do believe you are right, Joss. Will you take me to the pub so I can have a drink to toast her and drown my sorrows at the same time?’
She reached out and clasped his hand. At first he wasn’t sure what to do but then he gripped it gently and together they left the grave and walked back towards the pub. It was busy inside, the locals loving nothing more than a funeral as a good excuse to not do any work and drink ale all day. She sat on a chair in the corner and waited while Joss went to the bar to get her a drink. He came back with one each and then he sat down next to her. The next couple of hours went past in a blur and Betsy got drunker and drunker until she could not stand straight.
When Mrs Whitman brought her back she nodded at Joss. ‘I think you should take her home, Joss, make sure she’s tucked up in bed and lock the door behind you.’
He nodded. He knew that Mrs Whitman trusted him but he did not know if he trusted himself; she was all he could think about until an image of his wife would appear in front of his eyes and remind him he was a married man. He stood up and helped Betsy to her feet.
‘Come on, Betsy. I think it’s time you and me went home now.’
Betsy began to laugh. ‘Why, Joss, are you finally propositioning me? I thought the day would never come.’
His cheeks began to burn but he grinned at the same time. ‘Not as such. I just want to make sure you get home safely. Seth told me about the other night and how you thought there was an intruder in your house.’
He took hold of her arm and walked her towards the front of the busy pub and out of the door into the cobbled street. It was dusk now and he really should get back to his children; he’d been gone all afternoon. He walked Betsy across the village square and towards her house. They went inside and he began to light some candles and close the windows, which had been left open to air the house through and get rid of the smell of death. She stumbled as she walked across the room to where there was a curtain drawn across; tugging it open, she nodded at the empty bed then turned back to him.
‘Are you going to tuck me in, Joss, make sure I’m safe?’
He nodded, not sure if he should be taking a young woman upstairs to her bedroom, but he didn’t want her falling. As she stumbled her way to the top and into her bedroom he followed her. She began to undress and once more he felt his cheeks begin to burn and he turned around to face the wall until she had put her got into bed. He felt her warm hands wrap around his waist and, as he turned to face her, she hugged him.
‘Thank you, Joss. Today you have been my protector and I like it. I like it very much. If I can ever repay the favour I will.’
‘You are very welcome, Betsy. Grief is a terrible thing.’
Before he could finish what he was saying she stood on her tiptoes and put her soft lips against his much rougher ones. He paused, knowing this was wrong, but then he pushed the thought to one side and kissed her back. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she didn’t stop and he didn’t want her to. Scooping her up, he carried her over to the bed and laid her down, climbing on next to her. His hands ran up and down her legs and he marvelled at how soft her skin was and how good she smelt. She began tugging at his trousers and he wanted nothing more than to bury himself inside her but he stopped, guilt at the thought of his dead wife and his two boys who were waiting for him back at the farm making everything which had seemed so wonderful only seconds ago feel so wrong.
He pulled himself off her and stood up. ‘I’m sorry, Betsy, I really am. I shouldn’t have acted like that with you, especially when you are so upset.’
‘Joss, now is not the time to take the moral high ground. I want you and I know you want me…well, you did a minute ago.’
She reached out and let her fingers trail over the front of his trousers.
‘Yes, I do want you, I did want you, but I have to get home to my boys. They will be wondering where I’ve got to. They need me.’
Betsy felt a cold shard of jealousy stab straight through her heart. He thought the little bastards were more important than her and what she would have let him do to her would have made most men’s dreams come true. Her eyes narrowed but she said nothing, just nodded.
He fastened his trousers and tucked his shirt back in. ‘I will come and see you tomorrow; you get some sleep.’
And with that he turned and left her alone in her bed. She waited until she heard him close the front door and then she screamed and hit her fists against the pillow in frustration, hatred forming in the pit of her stomach against nine-year-old twin boys she had never even met. They would not get in the way of what she wanted—and what she wanted was their father and his big house. The alcohol began to make her brain foggy and her eyes began to close. She drifted off to sleep, dreaming of a big cottage to live in, with just her and Joss and no horrid children running around in the garden spoiling her life.
Chapter Five
Annie handed a plate of scrambled egg on toast to Will and a mug of coffee, then she sat opposite him with her coffee.
He looked up at her. ‘Are you okay? It’s just you were tossing and turning so much in your sleep last night I thought you were doing an aerobics class.’
She laughed. ‘Maybe that’s why I’m so knackered this morning then. I’m fine, thanks. Just a bit tired. I keep having the same nightmare—I’m running away from a group of men who are chasing me but, before I find out what happens, I always wake up at the same part.’
‘Well, I hope it wasn’t me you were running from!’ He reached out for her hand. ‘You’re not having second thoughts about the wedding, are you? I understand if you are. I know you had a crap time with Mike. Plus it’s all been blown up way out of proportion, hasn’t it? I know Lil means well, but honestly, dancing lessons so we get the first dance right is going a little bit over the top if you ask me. What’s wrong with a fumble in the dark and a bit of drunken swaying from side to side? I can ask my dad to tell her to take a step back if you want?’
‘Don’t be daft. I want to be Mrs Ashworth more than I want anything in this whole world. There is no comparison between you and Mike; you could never be like him if you tried, and yes, the dancing lessons are a bit too far but she’s only trying to help. She wants it to be perfect and so do I. The first time round, it was more a marriage of convenience really. A quick “I do” in the register office and then back to the pub for pie and peas, all to get away from my mother. There’s just so much going on at the moment that I don’t know what to think about first. Alex and Jake are coming to the cottage with me this afternoon to go over Alex’s plans with the builders again. It comes in handy having an architect as a friend; he’s saved us a fortune.’
‘I know and he’s so good; I didn’t recognise the downstairs when I called a couple of days ago—it’s really taking shape. Are you happy with it?’
‘I love it; it’s everything I’ve ever dreamt of and more. Thank you.’
‘Don’t thank me; you own just as much of it as I do. I just want you to be happy, Annie, for us to be happy and spend the rest of our lives together.’
She stood up and walked around to where he was sitting and wrapped her arms around him, kissing him on the cheek. ‘I am happy, Will, in fact I’ve never been so happy.’
She left to go and get ready, put a bit of make-up on so she didn’t look like the Bride of Frankenstein, as Jake so lovingly called her. Will shouted goodbye as he went out of the front door and she ran to the bedroom window to knock on it and wave to him, blowing him a kiss. She tried not to think about the dreams that were threatening to take over but it was hard and they scared her because they were so real. Every morning she woke up at the same point, just as she fell over the rock and down the embankment into the icy-cold river. In a way she wanted to know what happened next: did she hit her head and die or did the men with the dogs catch up with her? Whatever it was and whoever the woman was, it must have been terrifying for her, all alone and being chased like a criminal. It never entered Annie’s mind that the woman might have committed some heinous act and that was the reason she was being chased.
She got herself ready and then spent the next couple of hours browsing the Internet for wallpaper and furnishings. She couldn’t wait until the house was ready for the finishing touches. She’d already started painting the bedrooms as they had needed the least work doing to them. She decided to let Jake and Alex follow her up to the house in their car so she could stop behind to finish painting the master bedroom. She had picked out a soft grey paint for the walls and had ordered lemon accessories so it wasn’t too girly for Will.
***
Tom was sitting up in bed. He hadn’t slept well last night so Lily had insisted he had to stay in bed until he’d had a couple more hours’ sleep. She walked into the bedroom carrying a breakfast tray even though it was mid-morning. She placed it on the bed and bent and kissed his forehead.
‘Morning, sleepyhead—who said they’d never go back to sleep? You were snoring before I’d finished in the bathroom.’
‘You’re not always right, maybe just now and again.’
‘Do you mind if I go and do some bits of stuff for the wedding? I said I’d go and see the florist and a couple of other people.’
Tom knew that Lily was having more fun planning this wedding than either Will or Annie but they’d both assured him they were fine with it.
He nodded. ‘Yes, I think I can manage without my nursemaid for a couple of hours.’
She kissed him again. ‘There’s a letter—well, it looks more like a card—for you on the tray. Probably a get well one. I hope it’s not from a secret admirer!’ She turned and left him to it.
Tom looked down at the tray. She’d already poured his tea and buttered his toast so he wouldn’t struggle too much. He picked up the envelope and ran his butter knife along it. It was a pale pink card decorated with balloons and a baby’s pram, with ‘Congratulations on the birth of your baby girl’ written across the front. He frowned and picked up the envelope to check it had actually been sent to him. The name and address were written by hand in block capitals but it was definitely his name it was addressed to. He opened the card and a small black and white photo fluttered onto the floor.
Dear Daddy,
I don’t think Mummy ever told you about me. I’m a big girl now and ever so lonely. Mum died last year and I’m all on my own. In fact, I’ve always been on my own.
It’s time I had a family. It would be nice to meet you and my brother one day soon. You don’t know me but I’ve been watching you all for some time now and I feel as if I know you all. I hope you’re feeling better?
Love me
Xxx
Tom felt the tea he’d just drunk bubbling in his stomach as memories of an illicit affair that had only lasted one week thirty-five years ago filled his mind. He’d stopped it not long after it began because he couldn’t do it to Sarah, his wife, and he’d come to realise pretty quickly that although Emma had been a fun, wild, sexy girl she was also completely mentally unstable. Surely she hadn’t got pregnant and had a child and kept it from him?
His hands began to shake and he felt as if he was going to be sick. He pushed the tray to one side and tried to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. In his hurry, he slipped and knocked the tray, which fell to the floor with a clatter, but he didn’t try to pick it up; instead, he bent down and picked up the grainy black and white Polaroid photo that he hadn’t seen before and he limped across to the bathroom, where he slammed the door shut and began retching over the toilet bowl. The housekeeper came running up the stairs to check that he hadn’t fallen out of bed or collapsed again. She took one look at the overturned tray and broken china which had spilt onto a small white envelope and grinned. Daddy hadn’t taken it too well, by the look of things.
She knocked on the bathroom door. ‘Mr Ashworth, are you okay?’
‘Yes, sorry about the mess. I’ll clean it up in a minute.’
She nodded to herself but set about cleaning it up anyway; it was her job to help with the mess and to look after him and she took it very seriously. Almost as seriously as her plans to kidnap her half-brother and hold him for ransom.
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