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That’s when he’d kissed her, and she’d responded as if her life had depended on it.
The kiss expanded, catching both of them in its web. They kissed again and again. She’d hardly noticed Adam unfastening her blouse. His hand on her breast had been so arousing. She’d unbuttoned his shirt, felt his hot skin and springy brown hair. When his hand ventured between her thighs and cupped her, she’d reached for his belt.
But then she’d heard voices in the hall. Gazing up at Adam, she’d glimpsed the hungry desire in his eyes.
“What’s wrong?” he’d asked.
She’d panicked. She was almost naked, lying under a man she didn’t even know!
She’d slid away from him, scrambled to a sitting position, avoided his gaze and buttoned her blouse. “I can’t do this. I should never have let this happen!”
And then she’d bolted, leaving Adam sitting there. She’d rushed out of the winery, wondering what in blazes had gotten into her, wondering why she’d been reckless when she’d never done anything like that before.
Now Kaitlyn hurried to keep up with Adam’s long strides to the baby department. In the year since she’d met him at the winery, she’d thought about him. But she hadn’t had any means of contacting him in a remote location.
When Erica made a noise, Adam stopped and looked down at her as if...as if he cared.
Could this bad boy—after all, she’d researched him after their “encounter”—who traveled the world, really care about an infant? An infant who wasn’t even his?
Glancing up at her, seeing that she was watching him, Adam looked disconcerted. Then his expression changed, and he didn’t look disconcerted as much as he looked determined. “We should talk about what happened the last time we were together.”
Uh-oh. Maybe his mind had been wandering in the same direction. “This isn’t a good place,” she said calmly. Her heart sped up, and she knew she didn’t want to have that discussion at all, let alone here.
His jaw set and his gaze was just a little too penetrating. “That’s an excuse—I’ll settle for it for now, at least until we get everything we need for Erica.... What do we need?”
At the baby section now, Kaitlyn pointed to a big box on the lower shelf. “You need a swing.”
He looked at her as if she were crazy.
“Really,” she assured him. “Erica fell asleep in the car. That means she likes motion. So if you want any peace, you should give her motion.” She pointed to the picture on the box.
Adam crouched down to look at it more closely. The overhead lights glimmered on russet strands in his hair, thick dark hair she’d run her fingers through. His shoulders were wider than the box he was studying. Those shoulders had felt tautly muscled under her hands. He was so long-waisted, with a runner’s legs. He’d told her he jogged wherever he happened to be. She remembered the pressure of his lower body on top of hers. His jeans fit him too well. Although his shirt was loose, as he crouched down like that, examining the box, it molded to his back.
Although it had been over a year, she hadn’t been able to dismiss the picture of the two of them entwined in each other’s arms. It had haunted her dreams.
He grabbed one of the boxes, easily lifted it, and stowed it on the bottom of their cart. “It doesn’t look too complicated. In fact, it makes me wonder if the company should make them for adults.”
She couldn’t help but smile at the wryness in his tone. “I’ve often thought I’d like a swing on my front porch. That’s if I ever have a front porch.”
“Where do you live now?”
“I rent a town house—no maintenance, no upkeep, no porch.”
He studied her as if he were searching for meaning under her words. “I suppose you’re not home much.”
“If I’m not at my office, I’m doing volunteer work for The Mommy Club. That doesn’t leave spare time to plant a garden.”
“I know what you mean,” Adam said. “But sometimes I wonder what normal life would be like.”
“Normal?”
“Yeah, you know. A nine-to-five job, leisure time in the evenings, regular weekends. If I had a normal life...if I hadn’t been out of the country...” He motioned to Erica. “Maybe I would have seen what was happening with Tina.”
The work he did for a private consulting firm out of Sacramento sounded important. The night they’d met, he’d explained that he traveled the world doing research helping countries put in water systems. Before...before they’d ended up in each other’s arms on that couch.
Pushing that memory aside once more, she took this opportunity to get firsthand knowledge of his life. “You come and go as you please. You travel to exotic places. That would be hard to give up.”
“Yes, it would,” he admitted. “I don’t like to feel trapped, tied down, tethered to one place. That brings back memories of—” He stopped, and she could see he wasn’t going to go on.
What did he run from in his mind? What kept him on the move? Searching for something that would satisfy him? She knew what would satisfy her, yet it seemed impossible and out of her reach.
Gazing down at Erica, she suddenly wondered if she should adopt a child. Why not forget about relationships and the marriage part.
The silence between them grew awkward, and Kaitlyn reached for a contraption hanging on a hook. “This is something else you need.”
“I’m afraid to ask what it is,” he said in a wry tone.
She looked at Erica and saw that her eyes were wide-open. “It’s as good a time as any to try this out.” She gave it to Adam and said, “Hang this part around your neck.”
Adam did as she suggested, looking wary.
Scooping Erica from her car seat, Kaitlyn placed her in the sling, close to Adam’s chest. She had to touch his chest and that reminded her of touching it once before. When her fingers brushed against him, the look in his eyes said he remembered, too.
“I can get it,” he decided, taking a step away from her. “Now that I think about it, I’ve seen women wearing these.”
“Daddies, too,” she assured him. “That keeps Erica close to your body heat, and she feels more secure.”
Their eyes met. She remembered his body heat, feeling secure, but so much more, too.
“Kaitlyn!” She was never so glad to hear her name called.
She knew the voice, and it was a welcome relief, interrupting the too-knowing moment between her and Adam. She turned and saw her friend Marissa Lopez strolling down the aisle, her one-year-old sitting in the basket kicking his legs.
She gave them both a wide smile. “Hi, Marissa.” She went over to Jordan and tickled his tummy. “And how are you, big boy?”
He grinned at her and stuck a finger in his mouth. Kaitlyn had babysat Jordan many times. “What are you doing here?”
“I needed diapers again,” Marissa added, brushing her black curls away from her face.
Kaitlyn introduced Adam and said, “Marissa works at Raintree Winery.”
“Jase is your boss?” Adam asked.
Marissa nodded with a wide smile. “Yes. More than that, really. He and Sara have become good friends.”
“I met Jase when we crossed paths in Africa a few years ago.”
“That’s when he was photographing children in refugee camps?” Kaitlyn asked.
Adam nodded. “I was in the area with a humanitarian group that was trying to bring safe water to some of the villages.”
Erica gave a little cry, and Marissa came over to her. “What a sweetie. Is she about two months old?”
“About,” Adam confirmed. “She’s my sister’s baby. I’m taking care of her for a while. The Mommy Club sent Kaitlyn to give me a few instructions.”
That was one way of putting it, Kaitlyn supposed.
“The Mommy Club’s been a lifesaver for me, too,” Marissa told him. “I’m a single mom and they’ve been a great help. We all try to give back when we can. Sara is watching Jordan while I volunteer at Thrifty Solutions, The Mommy Club thrift store, tomorrow night.”
“I’m there on Monday evening,” Kaitlyn said.
Adam eyed Jordan. “Is he walking yet?”
“Oh, yes, and running. He helps me get my exercise every day.”
They all laughed and Adam shook his head. “I’ve learned respect for all new moms.”
Marissa checked her watch. “I have to get going. I had the morning off because I worked some long hours last week. But now I have to take Jordan to day care and get to the winery.” She studied Adam and Erica. “Good luck. If you have Kaitlyn advising you, you will be okay.”
After a hug for Kaitlyn, she wheeled her cart away.
“So she’s a single mom?” Adam asked reflectively as they watched Marissa walk away. He was trying to put himself in his sister’s place, trying to imagine what she’d been thinking and feeling before she’d left.
“Yes, she is.”
“And you became friends because of The Mommy Club?” He’d imagined The Mommy Club was mostly a group of women looking out for each other. It was a nice concept really.
“We did.”
“I don’t see how you have time for it all.”
“I think we all make time for what we want to do.”
He wondered if The Mommy Club filled a need Kaitlyn had to help and nurture. What did that need come from? He found he was awfully curious about her and wanted to know.
He pointed to a portable crib. “I guess I’ll get one of those, too. I can donate it to The Mommy Club when Tina returns. I’m sure she’ll be back before the week’s out.”
Kaitlyn stood a little closer so their conversation was private. “It could be longer than a week. If your sister is in the throes of postpartum depression, she might need a doctor’s help to emerge from it.”
Adam’s brow furrowed. “How am I going to get her help when she won’t answer my calls?”
“All you can do is hope that she contacts you soon.”
“I have to do more than hope. I’m supposed to be on a plane to Thailand in a month.”
Erica started crying, and Adam’s arms went around her with a protective gesture, but it didn’t help.
“If you’re tense and upset, it can affect her. Babies pick up moods.”
He exhaled, took Erica out of the sling and laid her in her car seat. “Maybe she’s hungry again. Let’s get what we need and head back to the condo.”
Taking care of Erica was complicated enough. Tackling the vibrations between him and Kaitlyn added to the unnerving situation.
Once he had everything he needed for his niece, Kaitlyn would be out of his life once more.
* * *
Back at Adam’s condo, Kaitlyn watched Adam as he held and walked Erica and readied a bottle with the new formula she’d chosen. Four hands were better than two in this kind of situation.
She asked, “Would you like me to feed her?”
He shook his head. “No. I have to learn how to do this and do it right.” He took the bottle from Kaitlyn, their fingers brushing. They avoided each other’s gazes, and he went to the living room, this time sitting in the armchair.
And to her dismay, he was still as sexy as could be—a six-foot-two, broad-shouldered, handsome man feeding a baby intently. Her heart gave a little trip. Erica was greedily sucking on the nipple, and Adam looked as if he’d conquered the world.
“If this formula is better suited to her, she might start sleeping for you,” Kaitlyn assured him.
“That’s an awfully big ‘if’ and ‘might.’”
“There are never any guarantees with babies.”
“How come you don’t have a slew of your own? You seem to really love children.”
The stark sincerity in his question took her breath away. Usually sure of herself, right now, she didn’t know how to answer him.
He must have realized something was wrong, because he looked up from the baby, and his gaze met hers. “Kaitlyn?”
Their evening together and what had almost happened between them flashed before her eyes again. It seemed to require some kind of honesty, though she didn’t know why. But she couldn’t be honest with this man. She didn’t really know him.
So she fell back on the usual excuse. “I work so many hours—”
Suddenly, a beeping came from Adam’s hip. It was his phone. “That could be Tina,” he said with some desperation in his voice.
Kaitlyn stood immediately and scooped Erica from his arms. Her hand brushed against his chest, and she could feel his hardness under the material of his shirt. She knew there was springy, dark brown hair there. But she concentrated on the baby and the bottle and settling on the sofa with Erica to feed her some more while he took his call.
He checked the screen. “Not Tina. It’s my father. He might know where she is.”
“Hello, Dad,” he said with a little more distance than Kaitlyn would expect between father and son.
She unabashedly listened, curious about Adam’s family connections.
“Where are you?” Adam asked.
He paused for an obvious few moments of explanation.
“So you’re in Ireland, but you plan to fly to England tomorrow?”
His father must have agreed that was the plan because Adam asked, “Have you heard from Tina at all?”
A short answer there, most likely no.
“Something’s happened, Dad. She’s not herself. I think she ran off and left Erica with me because she’s depressed and needs help.”
His father must have said something.
“I was out of the country. Didn’t find out she’d had a baby until I got home. I need to find her, and maybe instead of taking a jaunt to England, you should come home.”
Another pause. “I know you promised Iris you’d take her to Ireland and Scotland and everything in between, but this is a family emergency. Our family emergency. Jade’s gone and Tina has no one else. You and I, in the past few years, have practically deserted her. Of course she feels like she doesn’t have any support. You’re out of the country. I was out of the country. How often do we call her? How often does she call us? And what kind of example are either of us setting for her? You’ve been married four times—”
He stopped abruptly and glanced at Kaitlyn. His father must have made some retort because Adam shook his head and clenched his jaw. “I might be a serial dater, but you’re a serial groom. If you hear from Tina, day or night, anytime, call me. This is important, Dad. I have a group of people here who will help her.”
His father must have asked him a question.
Adam answered, “I’m leaving for Thailand in a month. I have no choice. This is a contracted commitment. If that means you have to come back and babysit for a while, that’s what it means.”
Adam just kept shaking his head at the rest of the conversation.
After he ended the call, he slowly slipped the phone back into the holster on his belt, looking as if he’d gone far away.
“It didn’t go well?”
Adam gave a mirthless laugh. “No, it didn’t. But that’s not unusual with Dad. He’s always been more concerned about his most recent marriage to Tiffany or Anna Mae or whoever comes next. But Tina and I—we were pretty much on our own. We never understood why he and Jade divorced. They never told us.”
“It seems you watched over Tina a lot when you were younger. Didn’t you mind having a tagalong? That had to cramp your style given the big age difference.”
“I didn’t have a style. I studied mostly. I ran track, but only so I could get a scholarship.”
Adam’s pride was almost as big as he was. The stiffness in his voice concealed his true feelings. She imagined they would have been sorrow, loneliness and regret. However, just as she hadn’t confided in him, she could tell he wasn’t going to confide in her. She knew about the arrest he’d had when he was twenty-one...that his younger years hadn’t been all studies and sports, even though that’s what he wanted her to think. He’d been involved in a serious accident that had been his fault.
However, she didn’t push further. She didn’t want to get more involved than she already was. “So your dad didn’t know Tina was pregnant?”
“No. I called and left a message for him yesterday after Tina left Erica with me. We’re a pair, the two of us.”
“But not alike. You haven’t been married four times.”
Adam gave her a penetrating stare. “No, I haven’t been married four times. But I also haven’t had a serious relationship with a woman for more than a couple of months. Make that one month. I guess I come from a gene pool that can’t commit.”
“You think it’s in the genes?”
“I think it’s in the genes, and I think you have to grow up in the right atmosphere. I batted zilch on both.”
“I don’t agree.”
When he studied her at her remark, she knew he’d never expected her to contradict him.
“Just what don’t you agree with?” he asked. “You don’t know what my childhood was like.”
“No, I don’t. But I do know we do what we want to do—when we’re kids and when we’re adults. Granted, it’s easier if someone teaches us how to get along with other people. But basically, I think if we want a friend, we make a friend. If we want a mate, we look for the possibilities—which could be anything from a one-night stand to a lasting commitment. But we have to want it, Adam.”
“How do you know what I want? Seems to me, you didn’t stick around to find out.” He sounded regretful about that and she wondered why. After all, he’d just admitted he didn’t date anyone longer than a month!
“I knew what you wanted that night, just as you knew what you wanted. But I—”
“You chickened out, and I’d like to know why.”
Oh, there it was. The conversation that she didn’t want to have.
Taking the bottle away from the baby, she said calmly, “I have to burp her. Do you want to learn how?”
“Kaitlyn, you’re cutting it off again.”
“I’m not here to discuss what happened a year ago. I’m here to figure out what’s best for this baby. Do you want to learn to burp her?”
Adam’s brow furrowed, his jaw set, and she saw the storms in his eyes. He was used to being in control. He was used to being in charge. And right now, he wasn’t.
“Show me what to do, and you won’t have to show me how to do it again.”
Well, those lines were drawn.
Kaitlyn lifted Erica and took her over to Adam. She said, “Sit up straight. You can burp a baby on your shoulder, but you said that wasn’t working for you. So we’ll try something else. I’m going to sit her on your knee.”
Kaitlyn knelt down beside Adam so she could more easily help. “Support her back like I’m doing.”
When Adam transferred his hand to Erica’s back, Kaitlyn’s was still there. She slipped hers away, but not without feeling the warmth of his long fingers.
“Now you’re going to put your other hand in front of Erica and let her weight rest against your palm.” Kaitlyn was almost between Adam’s knees now, and it was uncomfortable and awkward, yet also an exciting place to be, if she was honest with herself.
If he brushed his cheek against hers from this vantage point, she’d feel his stubble. She could remember the feel of his lips on hers, the tempting mastery of his tongue, the passion he’d evoked that had almost swept her away.
Inhaling a deep breath, and along with it his musky scent, she believed this was the worst assignment she’d ever had from The Mommy Club. When she’d learned the person who needed help was Adam Preston, she should have called one of the other docs to help.
Crazy, but she was feeling a little crazy right now. So close to Adam, yet emotionally removed. At least she was trying to be.
“Let her lean into your palm, and just rub her back. That’s all you have to do. You can pat it a little, too, but—”
Erica gave a loud burp, and the formula stayed down.
Kaitlyn gave a little smile then moved away, now that she felt Adam was more confident in what he was doing.
They were still too close. She realized the best thing she could do was leave.
She rose to her feet. “I’d better be going. I have to check on a patient at the hospital in Sacramento.”
“Leave?” he asked with a pointed look. He nodded toward the boxed swing and the crib. “I suppose I could put those together while she sleeps, if she sleeps. What have you decided about the situation here? Can you send somebody out to help?”
Actually, The Mommy Club was shorthanded right now. There were several members of the community who needed help. One young mother had had surgery. Another was undergoing chemo for breast cancer, and several women were helping take care of her children and bring in food. Sometimes it seemed like The Mommy Club had a score of volunteers. But when it came down to the nitty-gritty, daily help was hard to find.
Adam must have seen something in her face. “What? No one’s available? Or are you just going to call a social worker and say I’m not fit to take care of Erica?”
“That wouldn’t be the truth. But I really don’t know the answer yet. I’ll check back with you tomorrow. You’ll be fine. I know you will.”
“I’ll be fine,” he agreed. “But I don’t think you’re fine, Kaitlyn, because you’re running. I don’t know why, and you obviously don’t want to tell me, but you’re running. Think about that while you’re driving to Sacramento.”
Kaitlyn knew she’d think about nothing else.
Chapter Three
In the Sacramento hospital, Kaitlyn kept her attention focused on her four-year-old patient who was doing much better. She was grateful for that. The little girl had been mighty sick, and Kaitlyn hadn’t let that worry show to the parents.
But now as she read Mary Lou’s chart on her electronic tablet, she was hopeful her patient would be going home soon.
She’d just turned away from the nurses’ desk when she heard her name called. Valerie Tremont waved from the sitting area. She had a cup of coffee beside her and Kaitlyn guessed she was taking a break. A nurse here, Val had been keeping to herself lately, and Kaitlyn suspected why. A divorce. Kaitlyn knew firsthand how that could tear up a person’s life.
Glad for any distraction from Adam and his niece, Kaitlyn approached Val with a smile. “How are you?”
“Surviving,” she said with an attempt at cheerfulness.
“Are Chrissy and Craig okay?”
“We’re all adjusting. It’s not as if David had been home the past few years.”
Her husband, David, had been a medic in the marines and deployed several times. Over a year ago, he’d decided to walk away from his marriage. Although Val lived in Fawn Grove, she worked at the hospital in Sacramento because the pay and benefits were better than anything she could find locally.
“Do you see David?”
Val shook her head. “After that last deployment, his discharge and the divorce, he said he just needed time for himself. The last I heard, he was taking a hostel trip through Spain. I think he just saw too much in his service, and he’s trying to escape the memories.”
Kaitlyn sat down beside her. “How’s the apartment working out?”
“The Mommy Club did a great job recommending one. It’s on the first floor of an old house. I still don’t have an upstairs neighbor, which is nice because the kids have the run of the yard anytime they want it. And I can’t believe how reasonable the rent is. I think my next goal is to find a job nursing in Fawn Grove so I don’t have to commute. Mom and Dad need a life, too, outside of babysitting.”
“I’ll keep my ears open.”
“Thank you. How are you?”
Today she was a bit disconcerted, but other than that... “I’m good.”
“Are you going to The Mommy Club fund-raiser at Raintree Winery next week?”
Kaitlyn had to smile. “The bachelor auction? I don’t know. I’ll help Sara and Jase get the word out, but the event itself isn’t quite my cup of tea.”
Because the thought of a dinner date threw her into a tizzy? She’d never been much of a dater, not with her med school workload and meeting Tom. When she looked back at her marriage, she wondered if she and Tom had settled for each other because it had been convenient, because they’d both wanted a family. But her miscarriage and the reason behind it had ended that possibility in Tom’s mind.
“Are you going to the fund-raiser?” Kaitlyn asked with a twinkle in her eye.