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Kelli carefully opened the envelope, aware that her mother had sealed it with her own mouth. A final kiss goodbye.
Dear Kelli,
By now you’ve learned about the trust. You probably think I’m being mean to you. Maybe I am, but not without a good reason.
Your father and I both gave our lives to the preservation of zoo animals. I promise you, the strength of my dedication is no less than his. Will you give us a mere six months to see if you can get a glimpse of our passion? If I could have convinced you to do it while I was alive, I would have. I just didn’t know how. This trust is my way of asking you to share my life.
Only God knows the damage I’ve done to you. I hope He forgives me. I don’t expect you to. Ask somebody to tell you about Cocoa. Maybe you’ll understand.
I do love you, Kelli, more than I was ever able to express.
It was signed in her hurried script, Lillian Mitchell. Beneath her signature she had written, Your Mother. As if Kelli needed the reminder of who she was.
She read the last line again. Tears stung her eyes. Love? Nana loved Kelli and proved it by being there every day as she grew up, by taking care of her, by coming to her band concerts and taking her to Sunday school. Lillian didn’t know what love was. She wanted Kelli to share her life?
“It’s a little too late for that, isn’t it?” Her shout, aimed at the letter, squeaked at the end as her throat squeezed shut. “My childhood is over, and so is your life.”
She tossed away the letter. Tears blurred her vision as she watched it flutter to the floor. Once again, Lillian had proved what Kelli had long known: Her precious zoo animals were more important than her own daughter.
“It’s all about you, isn’t it, Lillian?” She kept her voice low, her whisper masking the sobs that threatened. “Your dedication. Your passion. It’s always been about you.”
Her gaze fell on the trust document, Lillian’s attempt to manipulate her, to bribe her. Well, Kelli wouldn’t play along with it. She refused to sell her soul for money.
An image of Nana rose in her mind. Frail Nana, who moved slower these days. Who sometimes forgot to turn off the gas oven until the next morning. There would come a time, and it might be soon, when Nana couldn’t continue to live alone. Lillian’s money would ensure that she didn’t have to.
“That’s okay.” Kelli lifted her chin, her decision made. “We’ll manage without it.”
She got off the sofa and went to retrieve her cell phone from her purse. Nana would be wondering what was happening, and when Kelli would be returning to Denver.
The zoo was crowded today. Jason passed a string of children in identical yellow T-shirts crowding around the red panda enclosure, and nodded a pleasant greeting at the pair of young women who stood watching them. He’d heard someone from Guest Services say they had a couple of summer camp groups scheduled today. Until a couple of months ago, he would have been assigned the task of introducing them to Samson and the other cats. But that was before Lil got sick enough to hand off some of her duties to him. Now Michael was the zookeeper primarily in charge of big cats.
But Samson had earned a special place in Jason’s heart a long time ago. No matter how busy his day, Jason always found time to pay a visit to the lion. That’s where he headed now, with Lil’s letter folded in his pocket.
Samson dozed on the shaded concrete platform in the corner of his enclosure, as he usually did during the heat of the day. Jason stood at the external barrier near a mother and her two boys, whose fingers were locked in the chain link. He studied the magnificent beast’s golden fur, his shaggy main. As Jason watched, the conspicuous dark tuft at the end of his long tail flicked upward, then collapsed again to its limp position. Besides that, Samson didn’t move at all.
“C’mon,” one boy said to his brother, his tone heavy with disgust. “Let’s go look at the monkeys. At least they jump around.”
Jason hid a smile as the trio strolled away. Samson considered himself too regal to perform for a crowd. He was, after all, the king of beasts, even if he was without a pride over which to rule at the moment.
The nearby bench, tucked into a welcome patch of shade, was empty. Jason fought off a stab of guilt and seated himself. A pile of work lay on Lil’s desk—his desk, unofficially—but that could wait for a few minutes. Here, in front of the animal Lillian had loved so much, was the ideal place to read her letter.
He ripped open the envelope and extracted the single page covered in his late boss’s familiar handwriting.
Jason,
I’ve never been good at telling people how I feel. I’m much better at telling them what to do.
Jason smiled. That was true.
I’m not going to get all gushy, because that will just embarrass you. (I guess I’m beyond being embarrassed now, aren’t I?) But I do think you’re a fine man, and the best person to become zoo director after me. I trust you to carry on the work I’ve started. You’ll get no higher praise from me than that.
I hope you and Kelli get along. I warn you, she’s going to have a hard time with this. I won’t ask you to go easy on her, but try not to make it any harder than it has to be. She carries a lot of pain. Maybe she’ll open up to you one day and tell you about it.
Get Samson out of that cage, Jason. Don’t let them take him.
Lillian Mitchell
Jason looked up from the letter, his gaze drawn to Samson’s enclosure. Lil’s use of the disparaging word cage spoke volumes. Samson’s home was pathetically small for such a glorious animal. True, it met the Association of Zoos and Aquariums’ minimum requirements, barely. But Samson deserved so much more. On that, Lil and Jason had been in complete agreement. Samson was a perfect specimen, healthy and virile, and easily met the AZA’s strict breeding qualifications. But without a proper habitat, the AZA would never allow them a female lion, would never approve Cougar Bay’s application to initiate a lion breeding program. In fact, because all zoo animals technically belong to AZA, it was within that organization’s power to move Samson to another facility, one with a habitat more suitable for breeding. And Lil had been sure they would do it. Her determination not to let that happen had flickered like gray flame in her eyes whenever the subject came up.
Had she taken that determination too far? Kelli’s image rose in his mind.
“Maybe she’ll open up to you one day and tell you about it.”
Jason slowly shook his head. “You sound pretty sure she’ll accept your conditions, Lil.” He wasn’t convinced. He’d glimpsed a touch of obstinacy in the set of that lovely chin, much the same as he’d seen her mother display. Kelli Jackson wasn’t the kind to be pushed into something she didn’t want to do. Surely Lil knew that about her own daughter.
He refolded the letter and slid it back into the envelope. In the days before she died, Lil had made no secret of the fact that she expected him to be ruthless in his execution of her trust. Even though he’d been reeling from the discovery that she had a daughter, he’d tried to talk her out of the crazy scheme.
“Lil, why don’t you just leave the poor kid her half and be done with it?”
The wasted woman in the hospital bed had been a mere shadow of the boss he’d known for years. But she’d leveled a stubborn look on him and rasped with some of her precious remaining breath, “For her own good. Everybody has to face their fears.”
“But why me? Surely there’s someone else who could do a better job, as trustee and as director.”
The soft pat on his hand held so little strength it felt like a breeze. “You’ll take care of Samson. Nobody else will.”
Jason thrust away the memory and abruptly rose from the bench. He crossed to the chain-link barrier and stared into the lion enclosure. But instead of Samson, he saw a beautiful dark-haired young woman with pain lurking in the gray depths of her eyes. A young woman who would probably end up hating him, according to Lil, although she wouldn’t explain why.
Well, seemed he had a knack for rubbing beautiful women the wrong way. Aimee couldn’t stand to be in the same room with him.
“This is your fault,” he told the lion. “I don’t know what fear Kelli has to face, but Lil was right about one thing. She already blames me.”
Samson snoozed on, oblivious. Jason put the letter back in his pocket. He was used to taking the blame where women were concerned. If he had to be the bad guy with Lil’s daughter, he’d do it. Especially if it meant Samson would get a new home, as Lil and he both wanted.
Chapter Five
Despite Kelli’s fears, the office wasn’t in complete disorder. The top drawer of the filing cabinet held a series of neatly labeled folders containing various zoo records. Those, she would box up and turn over to Jason. But the rest were her responsibility to sort through.
The bottom of the file cabinet and all the desk drawers had served as a catchall into which Lillian had apparently tossed her personal documents: bills, bank statements, even junk mail. Kelli frowned at the piles, her accountant mind trying to perceive her mother’s system. After a few minutes, she gave up.
“I must have inherited my organization skills from Daddy,” she muttered.
A movement in the doorway drew her attention, and she looked up into Leo’s golden gaze. The sound of her voice must have attracted his curiosity. After barely a second of eye contact, the animal dashed away, in the direction of his closet. Kelli chuckled and returned to her task.
“What a mess.” Tsking in disapproval, she cleared the surface of the desk, then began the tedious process of sorting the clutter into a semblance of order. Time to find out if Lillian’s finances were as big a mess as her office.
A couple of hours later, Kelli started to breathe a little easier. Her mother had left surprisingly few outstanding bills. Her medical coverage—the policy was in the bottom drawer of the filing cabinet—was comprehensive. There would probably be a few medical bills, but the bulk of the treatment would be covered. And she’d carried mortgage insurance on the house.
“A free and clear title. How nice for the zoo.” She didn’t bother to filter the sarcasm out of her voice. The cat didn’t care, and there was no one else to hear.
Her mother had carried several credit cards, and Kelli felt a grudging respect as she inspected the statements. Lillian paid the balances off every month.
The ringing of a telephone in the other room pierced through the empty house. Kelli jumped, startled, then hurried to answer it. She hadn’t even noticed the instrument hanging on the wall near the back door. No answering machine, just an old-fashioned telephone, the kind with a spiral cord.
“Hello?”
“Kelli, this is Jason Andover.” The low voice drawled in her ear. “We just got a call from the hospital where your mother…uh, died.” He sounded apologetic, like he hated to mention the fact. “They still have Lil’s stuff. Her wallet and so on.”
Kelli glanced toward the office. She’d seen the credit card statements, but now that she thought of it, no cards. Lillian must have taken the things to the hospital with her. Kelli had already made a list of companies to call with the numbers of the accounts to be closed out, but the credit cards should be cut up, the blank checks destroyed.
She leaned against the countertop. “Of course. I’ll go pick them up. Can you give me directions to the hospital?”
“Well…” He turned the word into two syllables. “Driving there can be a little tricky. How about if I run you over?”
Kelli straightened to attention. Why would he want to do that? Was he simply making a nice gesture, or did he have another reason?
A thought occurred to her, and she allowed herself a grim smile. He probably wanted to find out if she’d made a decision about staying on for the required six months. He wanted to know whether his precious zoo would inherit the full $1.4 million, or only half that amount.
She allowed a chill to creep into her tone. “I can handle it, if you’ll just tell me where it is.”
A pause. “All right, if that’s what you want. Got a pencil?”
She retrieved her purse and wrote his directions on the back of an ATM receipt. It actually did sound like a complicated drive, especially in an unfamiliar city and in a car she’d never driven. Maybe she’d been a little hasty in turning down his offer.
“When you get off at the exit, turn right and stay on that road for about, oh, five or six miles. You’ll see St. Mark’s on your left.” A moment of silence. “I really don’t mind driving you over.”
Kelli hesitated. “I’d hate to take you away from your work.”
His low laugh sent a delightful and completely unwelcome ripple through her. “Trust me, I’ll be here for a long time tonight. An hour or so away won’t hurt a thing.”
“Well, if you’re sure.” She sank against the counter, relieved. “When do you want to go?”
“It’s almost four. If we leave now, we’ll miss the worst of the rush-hour traffic.”
“Do you want me to come to the office?”
“It’ll be faster if I drive around and pick you up. Give me five minutes.”
Kelli’s hand lingered on the phone after she hung up. No doubt he had an ulterior motive for his good deed, but even so, it was a nice offer.
As she turned away, she spied two bowls tucked in a corner of the kitchen, one empty, one with a quarter inch of water in the bottom. Ah, no wonder Leo had ventured out of his closet earlier. He was probably hungry. What did the creature eat? Knowing Lillian’s affection for all things feline, he probably got fresh salmon or something.
A quick inspection of the cabinets revealed a package of macaroni, three cans of green beans, and half-full bag of dry cat food. Kelli dumped food in the empty bowl and put fresh water in the other one. That gave her just enough time to run a brush through her hair and smooth on some lipstick before Jason arrived to pick her up.
Not that she needed to dress up for her mother’s substitute son. Just that she wanted to look her best in front of the hospital staff.
Jason wracked his brain to come up with a conversation starter during the drive to the hospital. Small talk wasn’t his forte. Especially small talk with attractive women who obviously distrusted him. Kelli situated herself on the far edge of the passenger seat, as far away from him as she could get, and stared with a stony expression through the windshield.
The ability to maintain long periods of silence was another trait she shared with her mother.
“So, you live in Denver?”
Her gaze slid sideways for a moment. She nodded once, then looked forward again.
“What do you do out there?”
After a pause that went on long enough to make him think she wasn’t going to answer, she did. “I’m an accountant in a private firm.”
“That sounds like interesting work.” Actually, it didn’t. He couldn’t imagine anything duller than being stuck behind a desk, staring at numbers all day. “Did you go to school out there?”
“Yes, I went to the University of Denver.”
He executed a turn off the freeway. “I used to work with a guy who studied Animal Technology there. He’s probably close to your age. Maybe you knew him.”
“I doubt it.” Her lips tightened into a hard line. “I make it a point to stay away from people who work with animals.”
Jason fought to keep his expression bland. Had he just been purposefully insulted? Seemed so. This girl was holding a serious grudge against someone. Lillian, probably. What could have happened between them to cause such a rift? And why was she determined to take it out on him?
Kelli turned her head toward him, her eyes softer than a moment before. “I’m sorry. That was rude. I just—” She looked down at the hands she clasped in her lap. “I’ve had almost no contact with animals since I was a little girl. I prefer to keep it that way.”
“Why?” The question shot out before he could stop it. “What happened to make you hate animals?”
Her head tilted sideways, curiosity etched on her face. “Didn’t my mother tell you anything about me?”
“Not a word. In fact—” He faced forward, not able to look her in the face as he admitted, “I didn’t even know you existed until two days before Lil died. None of us at the zoo did.”
“Two days before? Why didn’t you call me, so I could have seen her before the end?” Her question held a note of accusation.
His final argument with Lil was still fresh in his mind. He’d wanted to do just that, but she’d remained adamant. “She made me promise not to. I didn’t even know your name or where you lived.” He paused and then went on in a quieter voice. “I could have contacted Daniel Lewis and had him get in touch with you. But I thought I could convince her. I thought she had more time.”
The silence returned as he covered the last few miles to the hospital. When Jason had parked the car in the main parking lot and turned off the engine, Kelli spoke again.
“It’s not your fault.” A sad smile twitched at the edges of her mouth. “She didn’t want to see me. No surprise there.”
Her shoulders drooped, and a wave of compassion took Jason by surprise. Memories of Dad rushed back to him. How awful to have missed those last few days with him. And yet, those had been the most difficult days of his long illness. At least Lil’s decline had been blessedly shorter, although certainly no less painful.
He cleared his throat. “Maybe she didn’t want you to see her. She didn’t exactly look herself right there at the end.” He didn’t elaborate. No sense describing the shocking change that occurred in the last two weeks of Lil’s life as she succumbed to the disease. Jason wished he could erase the sight from his memory.
“Maybe.” She turned sideways in the seat to watch him through narrowed eyes. “You didn’t know the conditions of her trust?”
“I knew some of them.” He held his gaze steady under her scrutiny, his hands still clutching the steering wheel. “I knew she was planning to offer the zoo an incentive to accept me as her replacement, and about the land and the expansion project. And I knew she’d made some provisions for someone else. I just didn’t know who, until two days before the end.”
“My existence must have been an unpleasant shock, then.”
His spine stiffened with a jerk. What was she accusing him of? “I didn’t assume she’d left me anything personally, if that’s what you’re implying.”
She studied him for a long moment, then gave a brief nod. “Sorry. There’s just so much I don’t understand.” A brittle laugh escaped her lips as she leaned forward to pick up the purse at her feet. “Not that it matters. In a few days I’ll be back in Denver, where I’ll fade into anonymity again.”
“So you’re not going to stay? Not even for six months?”
Her smile became brittle. “Not even for six days. My mother underestimated me.” Her chin rose. “I will not be bought.”
She opened the door and exited the car. Jason stayed in his seat for a long moment to let her decision sink in. The zoo would receive Lil’s entire estate. Once Kelli’s half of the assets were liquidated, Cougar Bay would have enough money in the fund to begin construction on the African Lion Habitat. Samson would have a new home. It was really going to happen.
Then why was he so disappointed?
The moment the elevator doors glided open, a strong antiseptic smell stung Kelli’s nostrils. She stepped onto a sparkling white floor and paused to read the sign on the wall in front of her. Jason didn’t hesitate, but took off down the wide corridor to the right, obviously familiar with the place.
He probably visited Lillian several times in her weeks here.
A bitter taste invaded Kelli’s mouth at the thought. He’d visited, while Kelli herself had been left out at her mother’s request.
He stopped and turned when he noticed she wasn’t beside him. “It’s just down here.”
She nodded and hurried after him, her eyes fixed politely ahead to avoid looking into the rooms she passed. The sound of voices drifted toward her through the open doorways. Halfway down the corridor, they approached a nurse’s station on the right, where a woman in pink scrubs sat in a rolling chair, tapping on a computer keyboard. She looked up. Recognition flashed onto her face when she caught sight of Jason, and she greeted him with a nod. Her gaze slid to Kelli and a smile lit her features. She stood and extended her hand.
“Hello. I’m Terri Wainright. And you’re Ms. Mitchell’s daughter.”
The hand felt warm. “That’s right. Kelli Jackson.”
“It’s nice to meet you. I was your mother’s nurse on the day shift.” The woman’s expression sobered. “I’m so sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you.” Kelli felt like an impostor accepting the sympathy of this woman who’d cared for Lillian during her final days. Surely, that was a daughter’s responsibility. She looked down at the floor.
“I have her things right in here.” Terri crossed to a doorway behind the nurse’s station. In a moment she returned carrying a white plastic bag with handles. “She didn’t have much with her when she arrived.”
Kelli took the bag. She could feel the contents through the sturdy plastic. Clothes and a hard, flat object in the bottom. She set the bag on the counter and opened the handles to peer inside. A green cotton T-shirt and a pair of jeans lay on top. She pushed them aside and pulled out an inexpensive leather wallet.
“She didn’t have a purse?”
Nurse Terri shrugged. “That’s all she brought with her.”
Beside Kelli, Jason leaned an arm on the high counter. “I never saw Lil carry a purse, only that wallet.”
Kelli opened it and inspected the contents. Three credit cards, as she’d expected. A few dollars in cash. An insurance card. And…
She swallowed against a suddenly dry throat. A driver’s license. She slid the card out and studied the small image of her mother. Same straight gray hair. Same eyes. Same lean face. No, not exactly the same. There were more lines in evidence, and her cheeks had thinned to the point of gauntness. She’d lost weight since Kelli saw her last. How many years ago was that? Four. Lillian had flown to Denver for Kelli’s college graduation.
Oh, Lillian. Unexpected tears stung Kelli’s eyes. If only I’d known, I wouldn’t have let so much time pass.
The nurse and Jason were both watching her. Blinking to clear her eyes, Kelli shoved the license back into the wallet and snapped it shut. When she put it back in the bag, her fingers touched a sharp edge buried beneath the clothing.
“What’s this?”
She grasped the object and pulled it out. It was a picture frame, the inexpensive drugstore kind with a cardboard stand on the back to prop it upright. When Kelli turned it over, her heart twisted in her chest. The face that laughed up at her was achingly familiar. A larger version of this same photograph hung in a place of honor on Nana’s living room wall. Daddy.
“There should be another one.” Terri pulled the bag toward her and reached inside to extract a second frame, identical to the first. “There it is.”
Kelli took the picture with numb fingers. She stared, unable to tear her gaze away from the image of herself dressed in a cap and gown, laughing into the camera with her father’s smile. Tucked in the corner was a smaller photo, Kelli’s second-grade school picture. Same smile, only with a hint of sadness in the eyes and a gap where the front teeth had been. Her last school picture before she went to live with Nana.
Terri’s voice was soft. “She kept those with her constantly at the end.”
Jason peered sideways at them. “She wouldn’t show them to me until two days before she died. When she told me about—” He gulped and shot a quick glance at the nurse. “You know.”
“She was hugging them when she passed.” Terri placed a warm hand on Kelli’s arm. “I don’t know what happened between you, but I know she loved you very much.”