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“She’s adorable,” Holly whispered. He noticed her gaze dart toward Cameron, who had wedged his hand between the metal bars of the cage door and continued to scratch Bear behind his ears. “Maybe I should consider getting Cam a dog. In the future.” Her sigh washed over him, filling him with that need to protect her from her thoughts. Ironically, he was part of the problem, not the solution, since her reprieve lasted until just after the holidays.
“Where are the rest of the dogs?” Cameron asked.
“Two dogs are showing up this afternoon and the other two arrive next week.”
“What happens if you get another dog? There won’t be any room.” Holly turned to face him.
“I’m well aware of that. I’ll have plenty of room once I move to the permanent place.”
“But in order to move there, you need money. Like the rent from the storefront.” Holly dipped her head and clenched her fists. But when she made eye contact with him again, resolve and resignation slid into her eyes. “What you’re doing is a noble thing, Ethan. I’ll vacate immediately so you can get another renter in there.”
“It’s going to take a lot more than those kinds of funds. The past-due rent isn’t going to make that much of a difference. My original offer still stands. You have until December 31.”
For a moment Ethan stared at the empty kennels and again envisioned himself in his new place with twenty-four kennels occupied and his sanctuary fully operational. Somehow he sensed the woman who barely grazed his shoulder and the boy kneeling in front of the other kennel would play an intricate role in this if he managed to pull it off.
The Lord worked in mysterious ways.
“Come on, the door should be dry by now. Let’s put the primer on and then we’ll come back and take the dogs outside for a bit.”
“Aw, just a few more minutes?” Cameron whined.
“We’ll come back.” Ethan held his ground. The integral part of the intervention was taking a firm hand and making sure the preteen knew who was boss.
* * *
Fifteen minutes later, they all stepped back and looked at their handiwork. Holly grinned and scratched the back of her neck. “Now I know why I leave the painting to the professionals. Your area looks much better than mine.”
“And mine.” Cameron plopped his brush back into the paint tray.
“It’s primer. It won’t matter, anyway. Not once the topcoat goes on. I’ll show you a quick, easy way to do it when we get to that step.”
“It’s a good thing you placed cardboard along the bottom. It saved the concrete driveway from the wayward drops.”
“Yeah, it’s a lesson learned the hard way.” Ethan grabbed the brushes and rollers to rinse off with the hose. “If you study the driveway enough, you’ll see the drops of paint from the first time I painted it six years ago when I bought the house. No matter how careful you are, you always make mistakes.”
Funny. He could forgive himself for certain mistakes, but not others. But then again, a little paint on the concrete couldn’t even compare to five people losing their lives because he was distracted. Careless.
If only he could wash away his guilt as quickly as he did the primer. The stream of water cleared. After shutting off the tap, he stood and shook everything out. “Good job, Cameron. We’ll make a painter out of you yet. There’ll be lots of painting needed in the new offices of the sanctuary. What do you say? Wanna come on board?”
“Sounds like too much work. Can I go back and play with Bear now?”
Ethan couldn’t help but smile. At least the kid was honest. Cameron would probably rather go to the dentist than do any more painting, but at least he had energy for the dogs. Exercising the dogs took a lot of time, time Ethan could use for paperwork, or raising money, or cleaning up the kennels, if he didn’t make that part of Cameron’s responsibilities. “Just make sure you put him on the leash hanging on the wall before you take him outside.”
“Sure thing. Thanks, Mr. Pellegrino.” Cameron spun around and sprinted away, leaving Holly and Ethan to follow at a more leisurely pace.
“It’s sunny today, so it should dry quickly. Then we can do a coat of paint. If that doesn’t cover it, I’ll do another one tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow? But I thought we’d get it all done today.”
He watched Holly swipe her fingers across her old sweatshirt, leaving gray streaks of primer in the process. That and the tiny splotches sprinkling her hair only added to her charm. It was all he could do not to try to remove some of the bigger blotches, but after his earlier thoughts about her surfaced, he knew that it wasn’t a good idea. Instead, he focused on Cameron.
“That had been my plan, but keeping you here all day wasn’t part of it, either. I forgot about factoring in the time frame of letting the coats dry in between applications. Cameron will have fulfilled his obligation after the first coat of paint.”
“But—”
“If I do another coat, that is my own choice, okay? You have enough going on. Let’s just keep it at that.”
Holly reflected on his words. He understood, and that scared her more than the thought of losing the shop. Because if she ever decided to let go of what she had with Jared and started dating again, Ethan would be the kind of man she’d choose to go out with. But she wouldn’t. Involvement with another man would only open herself up to more heartache and pain, especially if something happened to him. Besides, she needed to concentrate on her son and his needs. Once he was grown, she could focus on her own.
“I haven’t seen Cameron this excited in a long time.” Since before Jared’s death. “Thanks for giving him the chance. I’m sure he’ll do a great job with the dogs. And I doubt he’ll give you any trouble with his homework if he’s got something to look forward to afterward.”
“He doesn’t like doing his homework?”
“Not lately. Or pick up after himself, or do any of his chores.” Her sigh filled the space between them. “There’s a lot of things he used to like to do but not anymore. His attitude these past few months has been...for lack of a better word...challenging.”
Holly had to get a grip on it, or the spray-paint incident at Ethan’s was only the beginning. Some days she didn’t know where to turn. Jared would have told her to look upward and let everything rest in God’s hands. Yet He hadn’t answered her prayers to keep her husband alive. What made her think He’d listen to her now?
“I’ve worked with kids before. I’ll see if I can get through to him.”
He put his hand into his pocket but pulled it out empty. A pained expression flickered across his face, quickly restrained and replaced by one of resignation.
“Is something wrong? Did you hurt yourself?” She placed her hand on his forearm and compassion infused her. Only a bit lower and she could touch his hand. His injured hand. Did she want to go there? Only confusion answered her.
“No. I’m okay. I used to always have candy for the Afghan children. Sometimes I forget where I am. I don’t carry it anymore.”
“I’m sorry.”
Ethan moved her hand from his arm and squeezed it gently before he let it drop. “What’s there to be sorry for? For some reason God spared me but left me a reminder that He’s in charge. Despite my teachings in order to be a lay minister and everything I’ve witnessed, I forget.”
Unsure of what to say next, Holly trudged along beside him the rest of the way to the back of the house in silence. What could she say that wouldn’t sound phony or unbelievable?
* * *
Holly paused in the parking lot of the shingled one-story redbrick building. Despite her almost weekly attendance, she still felt uncomfortable since her husband’s death. This had been Jared’s church, his parents’ church and his grandparents’ church before him in the old building that now housed the youth center and other Sunday school classes. It was as if they knew she didn’t have the same beliefs, that she’d shut down her connection with God the same time He’d taken Jared away. Some days she felt the eyes of the congregation staring at her, drilling her as she sat in one of the back rows, as if they blamed her for her husband’s death.
That wasn’t too far from the truth.
Beside her, Cam shifted in his seat and refused to take off his seat belt. “Do we really have to go?”
“Yes, we really have to go. I let you sleep in, so you’re stuck with the traditional service today. Come on, we’ll go grab brunch after we’re done.” Not that she could afford it, but both of them needed some sort of treat. The Sunrise Diner wasn’t too far from the store, and it catered to the folks who didn’t have a lot of money to spend, unlike the more touristy places on the square.
Afterward, she’d drop her son off at his friend Tyler’s house while she opened the store for a few hours since Mindy wasn’t feeling well today. If the sunny weather held, the afternoon should be somewhat busy and she could reduce her inventory by making a bunch of sales. That would be less for her and Cameron to pack after Christmas.
If they even had a Christmas. So far she’d had no response to her seasonal decorating flyer, but it was still early in the season. She’d thought her idea had been a good one. Apparently, it wasn’t.
The butterflies in her stomach increased with each step. She joined the streams of other worshippers entering the church, yet Holly still felt the isolation despite the beige welcome mat by the door. It was probably more of her own doing than anyone milling around her, though.
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