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Copyright
Published by AVON
A Division of HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd
1 London Bridge Street
London SE1 9GF
www.harpercollins.co.uk
First published in Great Britain by HarperCollinsPublishers 2019
Copyright © Rachel Wells 2019
Cover design © HarperCollinsPublishers Ltd 2019
Cover photographs © Shutterstock.com
Rachel Wells asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.
A catalogue copy of this book is available from the British Library.
This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this ebook on screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.
Source ISBN: 9780008354602
Ebook Edition © October 2019 ISBN: 9780008354619
Version: 2019-09-12
Dedication
For Jessica.
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Copyright
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Chapter Thirty
Chapter Thirty-One
Chapter Thirty-Two
Chapter Thirty-Three
Catstrology
Acknowledgements
Keep Reading …
About the Author
Also by Rachel Wells
About the Publisher
Chapter One
There was something about the Devon air, which felt so different from Edgar Road, where we lived most of the time in London. As the sea breeze whipped through my fur; it soothed and chilled me at the same time. It had been a very stressful time lately, and for my kitten George – who would probably argue that he was no longer a kitten but a proper cat – so we were enjoying a well-deserved holiday and a much-needed change of scene.
We were on a two week holiday at my human family’s holiday home, Seabreeze Cottage, in Lynstow, Devon. The human family consisted of Claire, Jonathan, and their children Toby and Summer. Not forgetting our cat family; my cat son, George, and Gilbert, who lived full time at Seabreeze Cottage – Gilbert had been there before us and had become one of our closest friends. Although we didn’t get to see him as often as we’d like, we always had fun whenever we were together. Gilbert was more independent than George and me, having fended for himself for years before we met him. If I’m honest, George and me are pampered cats, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
It hasn’t always been that way, there was a time when I was homeless for a while, and I had to fend for myself. My first human owner, Margaret, died when I was a young cat, leaving me heartbroken and alone. I became a doorstep cat – a cat with different homes and owners – which comes with many benefits, I can assure you, but more of that later. Thankfully, after some time on the streets, I found my way to Edgar Road, where I met my current human families. George came to live with my main human family as a kitten, having never had to fend for himself. He’s a lot more spoilt than me, but he’s kind-hearted, and I love him more than all the pilchards in the world.
We’ve had a rough year, my George and I. My girlfriend – the cat who George thought of as his mum – Tiger, had fallen ill and passed away before Christmas. We’re still grieving her if I’m honest. I don’t think you ever stop missing those you love, and I have loved and lost a lot in my life. But as a doorstep cat, with multiple humans in my life – Claire and Jonathan and their children Toby and Summer, Polly and Matt and their children Henry and Martha, Franceska and Tomasz and their children Aleksy and Tommy. You’ll met my other humans soon enough.
Although this year was unfortunate in many ways, one thing we learnt was that life carries on regardless of the sadness you hold in your heart, and we had to carry on with it.
‘I know, why don’t we go to the sand dunes?’ George suggested.
‘Last one there’s a dog,’ Gilbert, who had joined us on the beach, shouted, taking off, we followed him, hot on his paws. I was breathless as I made it just a fraction later than George and Gilbert.
‘Don’t call me a dog,’ I warned, narrowing my eyes and they both laughed.
‘I’m going to slide down on my bottom,’ George said, the carefree sound of his voice made me so happy. He wriggled onto his bottom and tried to slide down the sand, the problem was that sand isn’t very slippery, it’s grainy, and it sticks to fur like glue. I went to try to give George a gentle push with my paw, but I tripped over his tail and landed with a bump almost on top of him.
‘Yowl,’ I cried.
‘Dad,’ he chastised as we both started rolling down, and although it was a little bit scary, we got to the bottom in one piece.
‘That was so much fun, Dad,’ George said, reminding me that maybe he was growing up fast, but he was still a kitten, my kitten, in so many ways. ‘Can we do it again?’
‘Let me catch my breath,’ I pleaded, I certainly wasn’t a kitten in any way anymore, but I would do anything for my boy.
‘Come on, George,’ Gilbert shouted from the top. ‘Let Alfie recover. I’ll roll down with you, it did look like fun after all.’
We spent the rest of the evening playing, rolling and enjoying the beach, finding some much-needed peace. It became another evening for us to feel lucky about.
It wasn’t just George and me who needed a break in Devon, my human family did too. Jonathan had recently got a promotion at work, which is a good thing, but it meant he would have to work longer hours, and harder than he had before. Claire had told him to go for the job, but she was also worried about what it would mean for us as a family. She had to be supportive, however, because we all knew that Jonathan was only doing it for us, to provide more pilchards for George and me – yum – good schools for the children (whatever that meant) and Claire was even getting a new car. So this much-needed holiday had brought us all together in a way that reminded us that we were a loving family. Not without our problems, of course, but there is no such thing as a problem-less family, another thing I had learned the hard way. And when I heard Jonathan and Claire talking at night when the children were asleep, I knew they were both slightly nervous about how the new job would be and how they were going to cope with not having Jonathan around so much. I tried not to worry about them, but it wasn’t easy – I worried about everyone I loved.
During the holiday, Claire, Jonathan and the children had enjoyed picnics on the beach, walks, and bike rides. George had tried to go join them in the bike basket, but he kept falling onto the handlebars of Toby’s bike, so Claire had banned him. While they had their human adventures, we had our own feline ones. Gilbert was quite an active cat, he often took us on what he would call country walks. They were more like runs, through fields – the first time we came here we were cornered by a herd of sheep and barely got out with one of our lives intact. He and George climbed trees while I stayed safely on the ground, and of course, we visited the beach, but mainly in the evenings when we had it to ourselves. After losing Tiger, I didn’t realise how much I needed a change of scene. Claire said Devon was like a tonic, and she wasn’t wrong – I felt as if I could breathe properly for the first time since I lost her.
In the evenings at the cottage, Claire cooked, Jonathan relaxed, the children, worn out by the activities slept well. Sometimes the neighbours came round, or someone would babysit for us while Claire and Jonathan went to the local pub. We were quite friendly with some of the other families in the village, Seabreeze had become a home from home. Even the next door neighbour, Andrea, who once tried to run us out of the village, was our friend now. It’s a long story which culminated in Seabreeze Cottage almost being set on fire, but luckily Gilbert and I foiled the plan and saved the day. It’s what I did. As I said it’s a very long story but Andrea, who had been deserted by her husband, now had a new man friend called Fred, who was very jolly, and everyone agreed he made Andrea a lot more likeable. It’s a shame the same couldn’t be said for her cat, Chanel. Chanel was George’s first crush, she was a mean, unfriendly cat, and George’s devotion to her had been quite alarming. Luckily he had moved on now and saw her for the scowling cat she was. Despite the family being friends of ours now, Chanel still hissed at us whenever she saw us. Not everyone is kind, unfortunately, and not everyone wants to be a good friend. I am, George is, my humans are, but Chanel certainly isn’t. Thankfully George has learnt to give her a wide berth, and her hiss is definitely worse than her bite – not that we ever get close enough to test that theory.
‘Right, it’s getting late, we should be getting home before Claire worries,’ I said, worn out from rolling and covered in sand.
‘OK, but we can come and play this again, can’t we?’ George asked.
‘If you’re good,’ Gilbert replied, giving me a blink.
‘I might need a day or two to recover,’ I said. ‘I’m not as young as you, George.’
‘No, but you’re not old either,’ he replied quickly. Gilbert and I exchanged a glance. Since losing Tiger, George was worried about losing me too. It was only natural but I wasn’t going anywhere. There were plenty of lives left in this cat yet.
‘Oh there you are boys,’ Claire said, when we walked into the kitchen, having done our best to get the sand off us and failed, as usual. When we went back to London from Seabreeze, the sand had a habit of coming back with us.
‘Meow,’ I said in greeting before the three of us headed over to our food bowls to eat our supper.
‘Right, well Jonathan and I are about to settle down to watch a film if you want to join us?’ she said. I loved how Claire always spoke and treated us as if we were humans. We were cleverer than most humans, but I appreciated the gesture anyway.
‘Meow,’ I said. Snuggling up on the sofa in front of a film sounded the perfect way to end the day.
We ate, cleaned up and headed into the small TV room. Gilbert took his spot on his favourite chair while George and I curled up in the middle of the sofa – the comfiest place.
‘Blimey, Claire, there’s barely any room for us, these cats take up all our space,’ Jonathan said as he squeezed himself into the small space we’d left for him.
‘But, darling, we wouldn’t have it any other way,’ Claire replied, kissing him on the cheek and trying to move us. George and I pretended to be asleep, so in the end, she had no choice but to sit on the floor in front of her husband.
Chapter Two
‘Back to Edgar Road, tomorrow, son,’ I said, trying to hide my sadness that our holiday in Lynstow was coming to an end. I loved being here; I enjoyed the change of scene, especially getting to see Gilbert, I loved how relaxed my family seemed, not to mention the beach. I even quite liked sand now. Actually no, I tolerated sand but I struggle with the way it sticks to my fur like glue and makes grooming such hard work. But then I loved watching the sunset, and the soothing sound of the waves gently lapping the shore, so perhaps I’ll just have to put up with sand.
‘I know, Dad, and I’m glad to be going back, to see our friends and especially Hana, but I’ll miss it here, and I’ll miss Gilbert of course.’
‘Me too, but we’ll be back before you know it.’ All our families from London had pledged to come to holiday here together at some point and being here with all of them was one of my favourite times ever. Having everyone I love under one roof made me feel like the luckiest cat alive. Sure the cottage would be quite crowded, noisy and chaotic, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.
‘But,’ George paused, looking a little upset. ‘This will be the first time we go back to Edgar Road and not see Tiger mum.’ His voice cracked, I could feel his pain. I nuzzled him, reassuringly.
‘I know, son,’ I said. Gilbert looked over at me and gave me a reassuring blink. ‘It’ll be strange not going back and telling her all about our holiday, but we can still tell her.’
The memory brought back the pain I felt every time I would walk past Tiger’s house, like I was being stabbed in the heart. There were times I would wait for her by the cat flap, even though I knew she’d never come out of it again – the sorrow hadn’t abated. It was hard, but as the grown-up, it was my duty to step up and help him through his grief.
I learnt that you can’t protect your children from loss; you can’t keep all the bad in the world away from them. However, you can do your best to help them cope with bumps in the road, it’s all any parent can do. Becoming a parent makes you realise how much capacity you have for love, but it also shows you your limitations. No matter how hard you try, you can’t control what the world will send your way.
The night was drawing in on our final holiday evening, and I thought about all those I had loved and lost. The pain doesn’t get any easier, but you do get used to it a bit more, I guess.
‘George, do you remember the first time we had to go past her house knowing she wasn’t there?’
‘Yes, I do, it was horrible in so many ways.’
‘What about the second time, when she wasn’t there at Christmas?’
‘It was difficult.’
‘I know, but what I want you to know is that it gets a little easier each time,’ I said with the authority of someone who knew this to be true.
‘But doesn’t that mean we don’t love her anymore?’ he asked.
‘No, it means we love her just as much as ever, but we also accept that we have to get used to her not being there,’ I tried to explain.
‘You know.’ Gilbert spoke for the first time in ages. ‘Missing someone is natural. George, I miss you when you’re not here in Lynstow, but I have to get on with life, and sometimes when I miss you, I just think of something you said, or when you made me laugh, and I feel better. I almost feel you here with me.’
I felt choked with emotion at Gilbert’s words.
‘I think of Tiger mum all the time.’
‘Look, George,’ I said, hopping on my paws excitedly as the stars began to appear in the sky. ‘Look at that bright star. What do you see?’
‘It’s her, I just know it,’ George said, sounding happier. ‘I can tell her all about how we’ve had a lovely holiday now.’ I nodded as he proceeded to do so. Gilbert and I looked on, giving him a bit of space to talk to his mum in the sky. I tried not to get caught up in the unfairness of it all. I still hadn’t accepted why she had to be taken from us, but I also knew that overcoming my own issues was part of process too, but something I felt I had to keep hidden from George. No yowling for this cat, at least not until I was alone.
‘You know we are lucky,’ I said, trying to keep my voice steady, as George finished speaking.
‘We are,’ Gilbert said.
Gilbert came to live in Seabreeze Cottage after running away from his home. I learnt that not every human was kind to their pets and I felt so sorry for him when I first heard his story, but at least now he had us, and he loved his life here. We tried to get him to come and live in London with us, but he said he wouldn’t be able to live away from the sea. I could almost understand that, but I loved London too. I loved the traffic and the bustle, and of course, London was where my other friends and families lived too.
‘We’re lucky that we get to spend time here, together,’ George said. ‘And I’m lucky to have such good families and friends. Not to mention how blessed I am to be such a handsome and charming cat who everyone loves.’ George winked with his right eye.
‘Chip off the old block that one,’ Gilbert said, with a grin.
I had no idea what he meant.
Packing up the cottage was always a bit of a frantic time. Not for George and me – we did very little but watch on as Jonathan moaned about how much stuff Claire had brought. He would grumble ‘how on earth am I supposed to fit it in the car’ although he always did. George and I would sit on the lawn and watch him huffing and puffing and saying words that no child or cat should hear, sweat rolling down his face in the sun as he tried to get all the suitcases into the boot of the car. While he was doing that, Claire would be tidying the place. Although there was a caretaker at Seabreeze who cleaned the place and fed Gilbert, Claire wouldn’t dream of her thinking she was above cleaning her own house. So she whipped through the house from top to bottom while the children got to play with their friends for the last time.
Gilbert had made himself scarce. We said goodbye to him that morning as we had a last walk before our long journey home. He didn’t actually like to see us go, he said it made him sad, so he would always disappear just before we were setting off. He was a softy at times, despite the fact that he was a survivor cat, who proved to be made of sterner stuff than many. I would miss him. But I knew we’d see him again soon. And as I felt sad I remembered how lucky I was to have so many friends and such good ones at that.
Once the house was emptied of our stuff, Claire, as usual, had to check the house again before she was satisfied we hadn’t left anything behind. Jonathan would surely moan about the traffic they were bound to hit if we didn’t get moving soon. They rounded up the children who were tearful at having to say goodbye to their summer holiday. Claire jollied them along by reminding them they were going to see their friends at home soon, and George and I were put into our car carrier, which I didn’t love to be honest. Although George and me were in it together, and there was a soft blanket for us to lie on, I wasn’t a fan of feeling caged. It made me a bit anxious, not that I’d let on to George. It was a shame, I thought, as I hid my feelings that Jonathan didn’t do the same.
‘Claire, if we don’t get going soon I’m going to be driving for hours and hours longer than necessary,’ he snapped.
‘OK, keep your hair on, we’re ready. Toby, strap yourself in,’ she commanded as she strapped Summer into her car seat. Toby was old enough to do it himself. Finally, after going back to check the house one last time, Claire got into the car.
‘Right, can I leave now?’ Jonathan asked, sounding tetchy.
‘Yes, is everyone alright?’
‘I’m hungry,’ Summer said, and the long journey home began.
It was nightfall by the time we reached Edgar Road. Jonathan was right, the traffic had been terrible, but Claire managed to entertain him by asking him crossword clues. I learnt that if Jonathan felt clever he was happy, so I think Claire only asked him clues she knew he’d know the answer to. She was quite intelligent, my Claire. The children were given snacks, and finally, they fell asleep, which meant the journey was long but peaceful. Even George slept gently beside me. I was desperate to stretch my legs and get some fresh air. As Claire got the children into the house and Jonathan took the luggage out, letting George and me out first, I breathed the London air, so different from Devon but so familiar.
‘Welcome home, son,’ I said as George and I stretched. Before we went into the house, I allowed myself a quick glance towards where Tiger used to live. No, it wasn’t easier yet, but I hoped that it would before too long as I swallowed back a yowl.
When Tiger was alive the first thing I would have done after a holiday was to have gone to see her, and tell her how glad I was to be home. But I couldn’t do that now, I couldn’t tell her how much I’d missed her, and it pained me to have to turn away from her house, knowing she was no longer there.
I blinked away a tear, ushered my son inside the house and stepped into the warmth of home. Once in the kitchen, I prepared to settle him down for the night, it had been a long and tiring journey. Frankly I just wanted to forget everything and sleep, hoping tomorrow I would wake up feeling better, or at least ready for a new day.
Chapter Three
The week after getting back from Devon, I developed post-holiday blues. Jonathan had to go straight back to work to start his new job. Overnight the relaxed – well for Jonathan anyway – holiday Jonathan was replaced by an even more stressed out one than usual. Claire had to get the children ready to start school again – buying uniforms, shoes and bags and organising clubs; it was a flurry of activity for everyone. But I felt flat, and although I got to see my other humans and cat friends, I still couldn’t quite shake the gloom.
It didn’t help that London was greyer than Devon and I was feeling more than a little bit down in the dumps. I kept telling George that our grief over Tiger would get easier, but it wasn’t feeling that way at the moment. Seeing our cat friends on Edgar Road – Rocky, Elvis, Nellie, and even the sour-faced Salmon – couldn’t cheer me up. My paws felt heavy as I walked, although I knew I needed to snap out of it, I had no idea how. Being a cat wasn’t always as easy as people thought.
I did, thankfully, have a bit of time to myself to try to let out my sadness, which I could only do alone. George was next door with his best friend Hana, a lovely cat who moved here from Japan last year. Hana was about the same age as George, and she was ‘Mikeneko’ which means she had a coat of three colours, in English, we would say Tortoiseshell. She was beautiful and sweet, one of the calmest cats I’d ever met – quite the opposite to my boy. I did wonder if George and Hana were more than friends, after all the boy was growing up. George could act a bit like a teenager when I asked him about Hana – he would shut me down pretty quickly, and say they were just good friends. His reluctance just made me want to know more …