The Cowboy Way

Chapter Two

W hat am I doing? Beth thought as she looked out the truck window at the tall green grass. Cattle dotted the pastures, and mountains loomed in the distance just like they did around Lizard Rock, Arizona.

With one elbow stuck out the window and the other hand draped casually over the wheel, Jake drove down what seemed like an endless highway, patiently answering Kevin’s infinite number of questions.

She stole a glance at him out of the corner of her eye. He had a strong jaw and a trace of beard that made him look a little like an outlaw. Long, strong legs were packed into tight, worn jeans, and he wore a crisp, white long-sleeved shirt with the top three buttons undone. He wore a gold buckle, almost as big as a saucer, on his belt.

He looked just like the posters and pictures that were hanging from every free space in Kevin’s tiny room. Because she’d read every article about him for the past several years, she felt like she knew him, inside and out.

She had always thought he was handsome, but she hadn’t been prepared for how masculine and virile he was in person. She had never realized that his blue eyes glittered like the turquoise sky above, or that his low, rich voice would make every bone in her body vibrate.

From the top of his hat to the slightly curled tip of his dusty boots, Jake Dixon looked every bit the cowboy that he was.

She remembered how he had picked Kevin up from his wheelchair and gently placed him in the front seat of his pickup—and Kevin was no lightweight by any means. She had heard him catch his breath after he straightened his back, and she had seen him grimace. He also had a noticeable limp. Bull riding was taking a heavy toll on him.

No doubt his drinking didn’t help matters, either. That was something that wasn’t mentioned in the magazines.

Her hands tightened into fists. She had heard all that she’d wanted to hear outside the airport. “You’re a drunk, and you hurt my son.”

Those same words had been running through her mind when she stood at Brad’s grave and while Kevin endured one operation after another.

She wrapped an arm around her son’s shoulder and pulled him closer to her. She hadn’t protected him from his own father, but she would protect him from Jake Dixon.

Her heart sank as she thought about the Wheelchair Rodeo program and how it was to start in two days. The literature she had received indicated that Jake had started the program, and he saw to everything personally.

How was she going to trust him with Kevin?

“Okay, Mom?” Kevin asked, breaking through her reverie.

“Hmm? What?” she asked.

“Jake said that he’d show me around the ranch when we get there. And that I can pick out my own horse from the remuda. Hear that, Mom? The remuda. And I get to take care of my horse all week!”

“That’s great,” she mumbled without enthusiasm. How was she going to tell her son that she didn’t want him near his hero?

“Okay, Mom?”

She needed time to think. She wanted to know more about the real Jake Dixon. She wanted to observe him. She didn’t want to hand her son over to him and trust him, the way she had trusted Brad. Not with what she had just heard about him.

Jake must have seen her hesitation.

“I’ll take good care of Kevin. And you’re welcome to come along. Right, Kev?”

Her stomach clenched. No one ever called him Kev, except Brad.

“Yeah, c’mon, Mom. Come with us.”

She could never say no to Kevin when he looked at her with those big brown eyes. And she didn’t want to throw a wet blanket on his excitement. Maybe it was unfair of her to compare Jake to Brad.

“Sure. I’d love to,” she reluctantly agreed.

“Yippee!” Kevin shouted.

The two of them went back to talking about who rode what bull for a ninety-point ride, and who was on the injured list. From the look on Jake’s rugged face, Kevin’s knowledge about the sport surprised him. If only Kevin were that good in English and math.

She laid her head back on the seat of the big truck and listened to their conversation. Kevin was bubbly and happy, and Jake was adding to his excitement, so much so that it was almost contagious.

“There it is! The Gold Buckle Ranch!” Kevin shouted. “It’s a real ranch!”

A slender, pretty woman in jeans and a navy-blue sweatshirt stood waving on the front porch of a log ranch house. Beside her was a tall, handsome man in jeans and a flannel shirt. They both had warm, welcoming smiles.

“My folks,” Jake said. “Em and Dex Dixon.”

She and Kevin waved back.

Dex opened the truck door and helped her out. “Welcome to the Gold Buckle, Beth.” He bent his head to peer inside the truck. “And this young cowboy must be Kevin.”

“Yessir!” Kevin said.

Kevin scooted to the end of the seat, and Beth let out a gasp when it looked as if he might just jump down from the truck.

“Whoa, young man!” Dex said. “Hang on there.”

Jake already had Kevin’s chair and the two men were helping Kevin out when Emily gathered Beth in a hearty hug.

“It’s so nice to meet you. I feel like I know you already from Kevin’s letter,” Emily said.

Beth let herself relax and enjoy the warm greeting. There wasn’t a day that went by that she didn’t wish she had a mother who would hug her like that and who she could talk to and confide in, especially now, when she was so worried about Kevin. But Carla Tisdale Phillips O’Brien Fontelli had never been that kind of mother, and she never hugged.

“Welcome, Kevin!” Emily said as the boy beamed up at her. She bent down and gave him a hug too. “I have you in the Trail Boss Cabin. That’s the far one in those big pine trees. It has a lot of privacy. Now come into my kitchen for a bite to eat, and Jake will drop your bags inside the cabin. That okay with you, Jake?”

“Sure.”

“Then come back for a bite to eat when you’re done,” she added.

“I have to talk to Joe and check on the mustang. Then I’ll be in,” Jake replied. “After that, I promised Kevin that he could pick out his horse for the week. Then I’m going to show him and his mom around the ranch.”

He looked at Beth and tweaked his hat brim. She watched as he walked away. His limp was more prominent now. His shirt didn’t have a wrinkle on it as it stretched across broad shoulders and a muscled back.

Most of all, Jake Dixon was born to wear jeans.

“It’s a beautiful place,” Beth told Jake as she looked out at the grounds of the Gold Buckle Ranch from the porch of the Trail Boss Cabin. “So big. I’ve never seen anything like it.”

The mountains seemed closer now and rocky. Those in the far distance had a cap of snow. The ranch was nestled in a valley with pine trees to the right and a field of grass that reached to the mountains to the left. Among the pines, a dozen little log cabins were strung along a glittering creek like charms on a bracelet.

The Trail Boss Cabin, deep in the pines, was postcard perfect. It was made out of rough logs, pine probably. Lacy curtains graced the windows, in stark contrast to the rugged logs. Two rocking chairs and a hammock were on the porch, just begging to be occupied.

Hundreds of cows and a dozen horses lowered their heads to graze on a slight hill about a half mile away. Closer were several other buildings of different shapes and sizes. The biggest was the barn with a corral to the side of it. Horses grouped together under the shade of several large trees. Some looked over the fence as if they, too, were awaiting guests.

She took a deep breath. The air was pure and held the scent of pine.

The Trail Boss Cabin was just as cute inside as she had thought it would be. It had two bedrooms and a screened-in back porch overlooking the creek. Pink geranium ivy cascaded from terra-cotta pots on the steps leading down from the porch. She could hear the rushing stream behind and on the right side of the cabin. Like all of the other cabins, it had a wheelchair ramp.

Inside, a stone fireplace took over one wall of the living room, which flowed into the kitchen. The appliances were old but brilliantly clean. The inside walls were varnished, knotty pine planks, aged to a golden hue. The bedrooms and the bathroom were down a small hall.

“Hey, Mom, it’s bigger than our apartment,” Kevin yelled from one of the bedrooms.

“It seems like it is.”

“Wouldn’t you like to stay here forever?” Kevin came toward her, the wheels of his chair rolling effortlessly down the hardwood floor.

Beth sighed. It was a homey place in which to live. So calm, so quiet. It seemed like she could reach out and touch the mountains. However, she had to make a living and that living was in Lizard Rock, Arizona.

Heaven knows, she had enough bills to pay. She lived free at the apartments and received a small salary for being the rental agent and manager, but she had to be there to do her job. She was lucky that Inez, her boss, had given her this time off. Unfortunately, it was without pay, and that was going to set her budget plans back to the Stone Age.

“That’s not possible, Kevin,” she said. “I have a job back in Arizona and you have school. Remember, this is just a vacation.”

“But if we lived here, it would be like a vacation all the time,” Kevin said. “Huh, Jake?”

Jake deposited their suitcases near the kitchen table. “Running a ranch is a lot of work, Kev. Not every day is a vacation.”

Beth could have hugged him for that answer.

“But there’s not a better job in the world,” Jake added. “Other than riding bulls. And there’s no state prettier than Wyoming.”

If only he had stopped while he was ahead.

They walked back onto the porch, and Beth sat down in one of the rocking chairs. Jake stood by Kevin’s side near the railing.

Kevin pointed to a long building. “That’s the bunkhouse. Right, Jake? I wish I could stay there with the cowboys tonight—”

“The Trail Boss Cabin is perfectly fine,” Beth interrupted before Jake could even answer. She might as well nip that idea in the bud.

When Wheelchair Rodeo started in a couple of days, he’d be moving into the bunkhouse with the other boys in the program, and that was soon enough. Besides, Beth still had mixed feelings about Kevin leaving her watchful eye.

“How many cowboys work here, Mr. Dixon?” she asked, trying to be polite but secretly hoping that he’d disappear. Surely, there were other guests who needed his attention.

“That depends. The door is always open to cowboys who are healing from their injuries, or those who need a place to stay for whatever reason. Mostly, they stop by for a few days for some of my mother’s pies or Cookie’s cooking. In exchange for room and board, they help out around the place.”

“Even more come for the Gold Buckle Challenge. Right, Jake?”

“That’s right, Kev. But they come for both rodeos. They like helping out with Wheelchair Rodeo maybe even more than they like riding in the Gold Buckle Challenge. Some of them bring their families and camp out in the upper pasture. Some just crash at the bunkhouse. It’s like a reunion.”

“They wouldn’t come if it wasn’t for you, Jake,” Kevin said.

“Maybe. That’s nice of you to say, Kev. So, how about a real tour?”

“Cool! C’mon, Mom!”

Kevin flew down the ramp before she even got out of the rocker. She was just going to remind him to be careful when Jake held out his hands to help her up.

Without thinking, she put her hands into his. They were rough, callused. Hands that did physical work, ranch work, real work. Brad’s hands had always been soft and perfectly manicured—but then, Brad wasn’t a cowboy. He’d been a stockbroker.

Although she was on her feet, she held on to him for a moment longer than necessary to take her measure of the man she would have to trust. The man who would be taking care of her son.

Jake met her gaze with steady, unflinching eyes. Eyes that weren’t bloodshot like Brad’s had always been.

“Is that the barn? Oh, wow! It’s the barn, Mom!” Kevin called.

Realizing that she was holding on to Jake way too long, she dropped his hands. “Wait for us, Kevin!” she shouted back.

Jake smiled. “I’ve never seen anyone so thrilled about a barn,” he said, as they walked down a cleared path.

They stopped at the gate of the corral. Several horses walked over, most of them sniffing Kevin and Jake. Even to Beth’s untrained eye, the long-legged, satin-coated horses looked like beauties.

“They know that I usually have a treat for them.” Jake dipped a hand in the pocket of his shirt and handed Kevin a piece of a carrot. “Hold it flat on your hand and don’t be scared when their big yellow teeth come at you.”

“I’m not scared,” he said, but he had a white-knuckled grip on the arm of his wheelchair. His other hand was flat, his face a study in concentration.

“They won’t hurt you,” Jake said. “Just reach out. Keep your hand flat.”

Kevin did it, and when the horse gently took the carrot, Kevin let out a little squeal. “Cool!”

Jake turned to Beth. “How about you?”

Beth nodded, eager to try. She held out her hand and he placed a piece of carrot on it. The horses pushed closer, each nosing for the food. She picked out a horse who was more patient than the others and opened her hand.

Jake moved behind her and put his hand under hers. “Keep your hand flat.”

It was a harmless gesture, but she could feel the warmth of his chest on her back, could smell the scent of his spicy aftershave, the warm wisps of his breath on the side of her face.

When the carrots were gone, Kevin turned to Jake. “Which horse is going to be mine?”

“None of these. They’re not ready yet. But there’s a couple in the barn you might like.”

He tugged back two enormous wooden doors. The smell of horses and hay drifted around them.

Kevin gave a breathy “Oh, wow!” and wheeled into the barn.

Beth inhaled. “This reminds me of when I was a kid and I lived in central New York—my parents used to take me to the state fair.”

Jake looked at her with interest, waiting for her to continue.

“I waited all summer for the fair. I couldn’t wait to go through the horse barns and look at all the beautiful horses. I’d pick one out and pretend it was mine. Then I’d watch the horse shows and cheer my horse to victory.”

“Now I know where Kevin gets his love of horses.”

Jake smiled, and she could see tiny lines at the corners of his eyes that were white against the dark tan of his face.

She smiled back. “I’ve always liked horses.” She paused, thinking back. “When Kevin was little, several times during the day he’d hand me a book, crawl up on my lap and ask me to read to him. I read every book with a horse or a pony on the cover a hundred times over. I’d take him to horse shows and rodeos when they were nearby. He just loved going.”

The memories that the barn smells triggered washed over her, all warm and comforting. Those were some of the best times of her life, just Kevin and her, and that’s the way she liked it.

Kevin craned his neck as he wheeled down the cement walkway of the barn. He didn’t know where to look first. On both sides were stalls, and most of the horses hung their heads over the half-door. On each door was a wooden sign with the horse’s name in black print.

“That one there is a beauty,” he said. “Wow! So is that one! And that one!”

Jake was patient with Kevin. As they came to each stall, Kevin had to pet the horse and call it by name.

After a while, Beth caught Jake’s eye. “Can I speak with you, Mr. Dixon?”

Nodding, he left Kevin petting a horse and walked over toward her.

“About the horse—”

Jake held a hand up. “I promise you, Kevin’s horse will be gentle. All the horses in this barn are hand-picked for Wheelchair Rodeo. I work with them myself. Don’t worry.”

“Easy for you to say,” she said. “He’s not your son.”

“No, but I’ll take care of him as if he were.”

She met his gaze. His blue eyes were as cool and as refreshing as a spring day, and he truly seemed to care about Kevin.

So then why couldn’t she let herself trust him completely?

Because she had trusted her son to a man with a drinking problem before, and Kevin was almost killed. And the man had died.

Jake glanced down the long row of horses and shouted, “You might like Cheyenne, Kev, or the black horse in stall three. Check them out.” Then he turned back to Beth and lowered his voice. “Look, I don’t know all of what you heard at the airport, but don’t pay any attention to it.”

“I heard that you were drunk and hurt a man.”

“I wasn’t drunk. I had a few beers, yes. I had some words with someone, and then suddenly we were in the middle of a free-for-all.” Jake sighed and looked away. After several seconds, his gaze returned to her. “Look, Wheelchair Rodeo begins the day after tomorrow, so if you’re having second thoughts about trusting me with Kevin, you’d better tell me now.”

She met his direct gaze. “I’m having second thoughts.”

“Fair enough.” He nodded. “Then take him out of the program.”

“It would break his heart,” she said. “You’re his hero. He idolizes you.”

“Lady, I’m no one’s hero. It’s all I can do these days to get up every morning.” He was speaking through gritted teeth. “And I might be a lot of things, but I’m not a drunk.”

That was just what Brad had always said.

Beth swallowed hard and glanced at Kevin to make sure he was out of hearing range. She knew she had angered Jake Dixon, but she had good reasons for not trusting him—or anyone, for that matter—with her son.

Maybe she owed him an explanation. “His father was an alcoholic,” she said. “He picked Kevin up at a friend’s birthday party. Brad was drunk and he drove his car into the cement of a bridge. Brad died and Kevin lived. After four operations in two years, Kevin’s still in a wheelchair. The doctors don’t understand why.”

“Oh…shoot…” He took off his hat and raked his fingers through his hair, then plopped the hat back on his head. “I’m sorry,” he said, watching Kevin. “But now at least I understand why you hate drinking.” He paused. “He’ll never get out of the chair?”

He touched her arm when she didn’t answer right away. It was an unexpected, comforting gesture. The look on his face was concerned and sympathetic. She wondered yet again if she was judging him too harshly.

She took a deep breath and jumped in. “Kevin’s last operation was supposed to work, but obviously it didn’t.” When the tears started to sting her eyes, she blinked them back. “He’s idolized you since he first met you at the Tucson rodeo. He was five years old. You paid attention to him, listened to him, and you gave him a red bandana. He’s never forgotten that, and one of the things that kept him going was his dream of coming to the Wheelchair Rodeo.”

“I’m honored, but—”

Beth held up an index finger. “Oh, there’s much more. Ever since then, he’s watched bull riding constantly on TV, looking for you, cheering you on. When he was in the hospital, he fought to stay awake to watch you being interviewed on Letterman during one of his hospital stays. Your fan club sent him a special autographed picture that has never left his sight. He wears your clothes. His room is covered in pictures of Jake Dixon. He thinks you’re the greatest thing since school recess.”

Jake met her gaze. “I don’t know what to say.”