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She’d thought they’d been careful despite the playfulness of their time together. She’d discovered a few weeks after returning home that they hadn’t been quite careful enough.
“Does he know yet? About Simon, I mean,” Maddie clarified unnecessarily.
“He sort of leaped to conclusions when he found out how old Simon is. Maybe he saw the resemblance. Simon really does look just like him, Maddie. I’ve always known that, but seeing them side by side...well, it’s almost spooky.”
“Oh, my gosh. So, what now?”
“I don’t know,” she admitted in little more than a whisper.
“What did he say? Was he happy? Mad? Skeptical? What?”
“Honestly, I don’t know. I didn’t give him much of a chance to say anything. I told him I had to make Simon’s breakfast, and I bolted. He said he wants to talk later. I could tell he was shocked, of course, but the only question he asked was whether I’d tried to find him.”
As the only person to whom Joanna had confided all the details of that vacation fling, Maddie was indignant. “This from the guy who ghosted you without even a ‘Hey, babe, I’ll call you sometime’?”
“Which is basically what I told him,” Joanna agreed, grateful her sister understood so well. There’d been a time when she’d never have believed she and Maddie would have this mutually supportive relationship. This closeness was one of the two good things that had come of her brief affair with Adam.
She’d always planned to tell Simon the truth about his parentage at some point. She’d even thought this trip would be a good time to tell him that she’d met his biological father here, if it seemed appropriate. She’d planned to leave it up to him to decide if, when he was older, he wanted to find his father. Not that she’d have been able to assist him much. She and Adam hadn’t exchanged many personal details during their time together.
Maybe she could have located Adam before now, had she put in more effort. She could’ve persisted in her request for resort records. As a professor, she had strong research skills. There should have been ways to track him down, though his name was common enough to have made it difficult without more information. She could have even hired a private investigator, for that matter. She’d found plenty of reasons to rationalize her choice not to pursue the search. For one, Adam had been clear from the start that he’d had no interest in commitments. He hadn’t elaborated, but she’d gotten the impression he’d had important plans for after his vacation.
Having just defended her doctoral thesis and on the verge of beginning a new phase of her chosen career, Joanna hadn’t been looking for a serious relationship, either. She’d simply asked him to assure her he wasn’t married. Though she’d been amenable to a no-strings vacation fling, sleeping with a married man would have crossed a line for her. He’d promised her he was single and unattached, and she’d believed him. Foolish, perhaps, but she’d sensed from the beginning that Adam was trustworthy.
“How did it feel? Seeing him again, I mean?”
Joanna still didn’t know how to answer that question. It wasn’t as if she’d been in love with Adam. She hadn’t known him long enough for that. Of course, she’d thought of him since; after all, she lived with a daily reminder of him. And maybe she’d wondered if the blazing sexual chemistry between them might have led to more had the timing and circumstances been different. Their situation seemed even more problematic now, considering everything that had happened in the intervening years and the big life changes looming for her and Simon.
“Do you think he’ll want to be part of Simon’s life now? Is he going to cause you problems? If so, he’d better damned well be aware that he owes six years of back child support. Is he married now? That could be awkward, huh? Will he—”
“Maddie,” Joanna broke in quietly. “I don’t know any of those answers yet.”
And it was the not knowing that had her stomach tied in tight knots.
“Mom? Is there more yogurt?”
“Yes. Just a sec,” she called back to her son. “I should go, Maddie. I just needed to hear your voice.”
“Do you want me to come? I can be there in a few hours.”
Because she knew her sister would absolutely drop everything and rush to her side, Joanna blinked back tears. She was so very thankful they’d set aside their early differences and had become friends as adults. “I appreciate the offer, but I can handle it. I’ll call you later, okay?”
“Good luck, Jo.”
“Thanks.” She was pretty sure she’d need it.
“Mom?”
“Coming,” she said. She put down her phone and moved to get the yogurt from the kitchenette fridge. Pausing in the open doorway with the container in hand, she studied her son with an ache of love in her heart. He looked so serious and sweet dawdling over his breakfast, a frown of concentration on his face as he memorized everything he was seeing on the tablet screen.
He was her everything.
Panic momentarily closed her throat. Her muscles quivered with a strong, if ill-advised, urge to run. She could be packed and checked out in less than twenty minutes. She could leave a note for Adam, which was more than he’d left her. Would he try to find them now that he knew about Simon? That would hardly be difficult if he worked for the resort and had access to her address. Would he disrupt the comfortable life she’d made? Or would he be relieved, instead, if she made it clear she’d ask for nothing from him?
No, she thought, moving forward to spoon a dollop of yogurt over the fruit remaining in Simon’s bowl. She wouldn’t run. She owed it to Simon, if not to Adam, to deal with this directly. As for her own emotions about seeing Adam again—well, she would try to sort those out later.
“You knew that man on the beach, didn’t you, Mom?” Simon asked, glancing up from his bowl with a smear of yogurt at the corner of his mouth.
She smoothed a cowlick at the back of his head. “Yes, I know him.”
“What’s his name?”
“Adam.” She saw no need just then to add the surname.
“Did you meet him last time you were here?”
She’d told Simon when she’d booked this vacation that she’d visited the resort once before, though of course she’d left out the details. What on earth had made her come here again? When she’d made the reservation just after her son’s fifth birthday, she’d assured herself Simon would like what she remembered about the place—the quiet beaches, the pools, the day programs for kids. She’d told herself it was time to deal with her memories of her son’s father, to see the place again through a fresh, more realistic perspective. If she’d had any idea of what—who—she would find here, she wasn’t sure she’d have had the courage to follow through. “Yes, I met him then.”
To her relief, Simon’s attention moved on now that she’d satisfied his curiosity. “When do I leave for the aquarium?”
She smiled, pleased that he seemed eager for the arrangements she’d made for him. Through the resort reservation website, she had enrolled him in the Explorers Club, a program for kids his age. Each afternoon this week, he would join five other children and two certified teachers for field trips and activities based on introductory oceanography. She’d thought Simon would be less likely to be bored with the mother-son vacation if he interacted with other kids in an educational setting. Her bright, inquisitive child was always excited by learning new things. As an academic herself, she wanted to encourage him to continue to view learning as fun.
“You’ll leave right after lunch. One o’clock. What would you like to do in the meantime? Go swimming? Walk on the beach? Build a sandcastle?”
He nodded abstractedly. “Okay, but first can we look up lettered olives on the computer?”
“Lettered olives?”
He picked up the shell he’d found on the beach that morning, a smooth, mottled cream-and-tan cylinder. “Mr. Adam said it’s a lettered olive shell, and he said it’s from a snail, but that’s all I know. The video I just watched didn’t talk about lettered olives. Can we learn more about it?”
Mr. Adam. She felt a wry smile twist her lips in response to the name. “Yes, but we’re not going to spend all of this beautiful morning on the computer.”
Which Simon would happily do if she let him. He loved surfing kids’ sites and watching educational videos, many of them geared to children several years ahead of him in school. Though he would start kindergarten in the fall, he was already reading at a third-grade level and was several grades ahead in math.
While doing her best to promote her gifted child’s intellectual development, Joanna made sure he stayed physically and socially active, which was another reason she’d signed him up for the day camp program. She also needed some time on her own to rest and prepare for an upcoming job change that was exciting but would involve a major upheaval in their lives. She’d promised that she would take advantage of at least a few of those free hours just to pamper herself. She’d put in too many long hours during the past year, spending every spare moment with her son, and she craved the downtime she’d arranged for these precious vacation days.
She grimaced as it occurred to her that she’d rationalized her holiday fling with Adam in much the same way six years ago, considering it a reward to herself after the grueling months of preparation for her doctoral defense. She’d booked the trip a few months earlier with her then-boyfriend, Tim. They’d planned it as their first getaway together, a step forward in a relationship that had seemed promising at the time. They’d broken up a few weeks before leaving, when Tim admitted he wanted to see other women and she’d realized that didn’t bother her as much as it should have. Rather than cancel her reservations, she had decided to celebrate both her degree and her newfound independence in her own way. And she’d made the most of that heady freedom with Adam.
Things were much different now, of course. She’d been young and completely independent then. Now there was Simon, and nothing was more important to her than being a good mother to him.
She just wished she knew what she was going to say to his father.
* * *
MADDIE ZIELINSKI HAD a hard time focusing on her work Monday. Her thoughts were with her sister and the trepidation she’d heard in Joanna’s voice that morning. Understandable. If there was one thing Maddie could say for certain about her older sister, it was that Joanna adored her son. For that matter, so did Maddie.
As unplanned as he’d been for Joanna, as unsettling as the circumstances of his conception had been to their parents, little Simon had brought Maddie’s immediate family closer than they’d ever been. And she hated the thought of some stranger—even if he was technically his father—coming from out of the blue to disrupt the comfortable rapport they’d developed.
Would Adam want to insert himself into the boy’s life now that he’d learned of his existence? She conceded reluctantly that she could understand if he did, but how did they know if this would be a good thing for Simon? The child had been sheltered and cherished his whole life, given every advantage Joanna could provide for him, raised with love and encouragement and judicious guidance. They knew nothing about Adam.
Maddie had no doubt he was personable, good-looking, reasonably intelligent—how else could he have charmed her usually straight-laced sister into bed within a few hours of meeting her?—but for all they knew, he could be a real piece of work beneath a slick facade. Regrettably, Maddie had more experience with the type than Joanna. Joanna might have met a few players in academia, but as a defense attorney, Maddie encountered them every day. She’d gotten involved with some real jerks in her personal life, too. Fallen for a few before she’d decided she’d rather be single and sane than hooked up and stressed out. She might be the younger sister, but when it came to the dating game, she considered herself more worldly and realistic than her sister.
Despite Joanna’s assertion that she could handle this, Maddie wondered if maybe she owed it to both her and Simon to make sure their best interests were protected. She wouldn’t call herself an objective party, of course, since her full loyalty was squarely with her sister and nephew. Maybe Adam was a decent guy—maybe he’d be a great role model for young Simon—but being naturally cynical and experience-hardened, she felt compelled to find out for herself if he could be trusted.
CHAPTER TWO
“ADAM? YOU WITH ME, bro?”
Frowning, Adam realized he’d been lost in his own thoughts during his meeting with Trevor Farrell, owner of the Wind Shadow Resort. Despite his efforts to pay attention, he’d heard maybe every other sentence Trevor had spoken during the past half hour. Shaking his head in apology, he murmured, “Sorry, Trev. Got a lot on my mind today.”
It wasn’t like him to be distracted, so he wasn’t surprised when his employer asked, “Is everything okay?”
Adam started to brush off the question, then hesitated. Trevor would surely run into Joanna and Simon at some point during their stay. Would he remember her from that long-ago weekend? Considering Trevor’s phenomenal memory, it was entirely possible.
“Do you remember when we met six years ago?”
Trevor lifted an eyebrow. “Of course.”
Adam had won an all-expense-paid, long-weekend visit to the then-new resort in a raffle to benefit a veterans’ charity group. Somehow Trevor had found out Adam was headed overseas for a tough deployment soon afterward, and he’d gone out of his way to greet him. He’d encouraged Adam to let him know if there was anything he could do to make the vacation more enjoyable. Having served a four-year hitch himself before opening the first in a planned chain of American beach resorts, Trevor was an enthusiastic supporter of the military. He’d encouraged Adam to look him up if he needed anything when he got out. Though Adam hadn’t really expected to take advantage of that offer at the time, he’d somewhat impulsively headed this way when he’d been looking for a job after his honorable discharge. Trevor had hired him on the spot.
Adam had thought he’d stay long enough to build a little nest egg and get used to civilian life again, then move on to the next adventure. Somehow, he’d ended up as Trevor’s unofficial second-in-command instead. And in the midst of that development, he and Trevor had become friends.
“Do you also remember the woman I met while I was here?”
A fleeting smile tugged at Trevor’s lips. “Her name was Joanna, and she was...memorable. I could tell you were mesmerized by her, and it was no wonder.”
Mesmerized. That was one way to put it, though hardly a comfortable description for Adam. Always respectful of his privacy, Trevor had never asked about Joanna during the past three years, nor had Adam mentioned her. But it seemed she’d made an impression on both of them.
He leaned forward in his chair, bracing his forearms on his thighs. “She’s here. She’s staying at the resort.”
After a moment of silence, Trevor tapped a few keys on his computer. “Joanna Zielinski,” he read from the screen. “She and a companion have a third-floor, ocean-view suite in Seafoam Lodge until the end of the week.” He looked up, meeting Adam’s eyes. “Awkward.”
“Her companion is her son. Simon. He’s five years, three months old.”
Trevor could do the math just as well as Adam. His blue eyes widened, the only sign of shock he allowed himself to show. “So...”
“He looks just like me, Trev.”
“That’s not quite as reliable as a DNA test.” His friend frowned now, obviously weighing all the potential consequences. Trevor tended to be suspicious, so Adam wasn’t surprised when he asked, “Do you think she came here looking for you?”
“I’m almost certain she was as surprised to see me as I was her.”
“Almost certain.”
Adam nodded. Was Joanna really a good enough actress to have so convincingly pulled off that look of stunned dismay? He didn’t know her well enough to be sure, but her reaction had certainly looked real enough.
“Did you ask if the boy’s yours?”
Adam swallowed hard. “She said she was pregnant when she left here six years ago.”
“Which doesn’t mean she wasn’t pregnant when she arrived,” Trevor pointed out.
Was it possible she...? No. Adam pictured Simon’s face again and doubted it was coincidence that the kid was his spitting image.
“She just happened to show up at the resort where you work almost exactly six years after you met here? With a child who could be your son?”
Clearing his throat, Adam nodded. “From what little I could determine in a very brief encounter, yes, that’s her story.”
“Should we put Walt on alert?”
Walt was another of their friends. Another veteran. And an attorney.
After a moment, Adam shook his head. While he understood and appreciated Trevor’s concern, he preferred to handle his own problems as much as possible. “Not yet, thanks. I need to talk to Joanna first. Find out what’s going on.”
“That’s fair. So...how do you feel about all this, Adam? Are you okay?”
He wasn’t quite sure how to answer that one. He was still reeling, still a long way from coming to terms with the potential consequences of this morning’s shock. “I guess I’m kind of numb. Not sure how I feel about it yet. Like I said, I need to talk with Joanna.”
“And if the boy is your son?”
His son. The very words sent a tangle of emotions through him that he couldn’t begin to identify. As much as he hated to admit it, he suspected fear was among the strongest ones.
“I’ll deal with it.”
Somehow.
* * *
THE CHAUFFEURED VAN for the field trip was already parked beneath the spacious porte cochere of the guest relations building when Joanna and Simon made the short walk from their suite. In addition to the concierge desk, a soaring lobby and a well-stocked bar, this large, three-story structure held a coffee and pastry shop with patio seating, an arcade, a tech center, conference rooms and an extensive gift shop. The management offices were located on the top floor.
The three guest-quarters buildings were all designed in a style similar to this one, distinguished by thematic names—Seafoam Lodge, Sandy Shore Lodge and Gull’s Nest Lodge. Joanna had stayed in Gull’s Nest during her previous visit but had specifically requested Seafoam this time, only partially because it provided the best views.
Another boy and four girls clustered around the van, getting to know each other and the teachers who would escort them to the aquarium. Simon appeared to be the youngest of the group, or at least the smallest, but he was accustomed to that. The other boy seemed relieved not to be so outnumbered now.
Joanna spoke with both the teachers and a few other parents hanging around to make sure the van got away safely. She was pleased to see her son and the other boy talking, their heads bent over the shell in Simon’s hand as Simon shared everything he’d learned about lettered olives that morning. The other boy seemed interested, and one of the girls edged closer to listen, so Joanna was reassured that Simon would make friends here.
Two men stepped out of the building, both dressed in the emerald polo shirts and lightweight khaki pants that identified them as staff of Wind Shadow Resort. One was Trevor Farrell, the owner. Though she hadn’t seen him since arriving late yesterday, she recognized him from her previous stay.
Adam stood at Trevor’s side. They made a striking pair, both tanned and fit, Adam dark-haired and gray-eyed, Trevor a fraction taller, his hair lighter, his eyes blue. They wore the same basic uniform as all the resort staff, but it was obvious to her, at least, that these men were in charge. She wondered what Adam’s job was and when he’d started it. He certainly looked at home.
She was having a hard time drawing her eyes away from him. But then, she’d had that same issue last time, too. As it had before, his smile made her heart race. She hoped her cheeks weren’t as flushed as they felt.
Ever the gracious host, Trevor stopped to greet the assemblage. “Good afternoon,” he said, his smile pleasant and practiced. “Getting ready to leave for the aquarium?”
One of the teachers, whose nametag identified her as Miss Deborah, grinned and nodded, making her blond ponytail sway. “We’re just about to load the van. As you can see, the children are excited.”
“I know you’ll have a great time,” Trevor assured them, then glanced at the cluster of parents. “For those I haven’t met yet, I’m Trevor Farrell, and this is my associate, Adam Scott. If there’s anything we or any of the staff can do for you during your stay, I hope you won’t hesitate to ask.”
Joanna chewed her lower lip as Trevor and Adam moved among the group, shaking hands and making small talk. She clasped her hands in front of her, wishing there was a way to make a quick escape before they came to her.
As the other children were being strapped into the van, Simon broke away to rush back toward her, holding out the shell. “Will you keep this for me, Mom? I don’t want to lose it.”
“Of course.”
Trevor and Adam reached them then. Adam’s expression was inscrutable behind his nonrevealing, professional smile.
Trevor spoke first. “Ms. Zielinski. What a pleasure to see you again.”
“You, too, Mr. Farrell.” Did he really remember her, or had Adam alerted him?
Out of the corner of her eye, she noted that Adam’s attention was focused on Simon. Her fingers tightened around the shell until the edges dug into her palm. She loosened her grip before she crushed the treasure entrusted to her care.
“I’m Simon,” her son piped up excitedly. “I’m going to the aquarium.”
Trevor glanced down automatically. Joanna saw his smile flicker slightly when he studied the boy. She figured the resemblance to Adam had to be obvious to anyone, and especially to someone who apparently now knew Adam well. “Hello, Simon. It’s very nice to meet you. I hope you have a great time.”
Simon looked eagerly at Adam. “Did you know the lettered olive shell comes from a predatory snail that eats small crust—crust—?”
“Crustaceans,” Joanna supplied quietly. He probably would have come up with the word on his own, but he was being summoned by the other ponytailed teacher, Miss Molly. Joanna gave him a gentle nudge. “They’re waiting for you, Simon. Have fun. I’ll be right here when you get back.”
“A predatory snail?” Trevor murmured, watching as Simon dashed toward the van. “And he’s only five?”
Joanna was accustomed to this question when people heard her son speak. “He’s academically advanced for his age.”
“I would say so. Cute kid.” Trevor’s expression revealed little of his thoughts.
“Thank you.”
Adam shifted a step closer to Joanna. “I’ll catch up with you later, okay, Trev?”
Trevor nodded and turned to leave without further comment. The van drove away with the eager children waving from the windows, and their parents scattered. Joanna was left alone with Adam for the first time since he’d crept out of her bed all those years ago.
He looked at her for a moment, then waved a hand toward the walkway leading to the lodges. “I’ll walk you back.”
Wanting desperately to refuse, she scrambled for a reasonable excuse. But because that made her feel spineless, she tamped down her nerves and nodded. Without another word, she turned and headed briskly toward her building, leaving him to follow if he chose.
Seafoam Lodge opened into a beautiful courtyard filled with flowers, benches and a small koi pond with a center fountain. No one else was in the courtyard at the moment. Stopping beside the koi pond, Joanna pushed her hands into the pockets of the yellow sundress she wore. She tended to dress in tailored dark garments at the medical school where she taught in the rehabilitation department. She’d packed comfortable, breezy clothes for this vacation she’d foolishly predicted would be fun and stress-free.