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No. She couldn’t be. But the fleeting thought made him reluctant to shout her back in.
He crossed the roof towards her. As he neared he could see she was shivering—shivering badly.
He reached out and touched her shoulder and she jumped.
‘Grace? What are you doing out here? You’ll freeze.’
She must have recognised his voice but she didn’t turn towards him. Her arms were folded across her chest and more wisps of her hair had escaped from the bun.
He walked around slowly, until he was in front of her, blocking her view.
Her lips were tinged with blue and her face streaked with tears.
Guilt washed over him like a tidal wave.
Him. He’d caused this. He’d made this girl cry.
Why? After five years he’d thought he was just about ready to move on. But Christmas was always the hardest time for him. He was frustrated with the rest of the world for enjoying Christmas when it only brought back what he had lost.
Thank goodness he still had his coat on. He undid the buttons and shrugged it off, slipping it around her shoulders.
She still hadn’t spoken to him. She was just looking at him with those huge brown eyes. The ones that had caught his attention in the first place. The ones that had sparked the reaction he should never have had.
Why was that? He’d always kept things locked inside. His friends knew that. They knew better than to try and discuss things. They spent their lives avoiding Anna’s name or any of the shared memories they had of her.
‘I’m sorry,’ he said hoarsely. ‘I should never have shouted at you.’
She blinked. Her eyes went down to her feet. ‘I should never have decorated the room. I’m sorry,’ she whispered.
He shook his head. ‘No, Grace. You were trying to do something nice. Something sweet.’ The words made his insides twist a little. Was it really so long that someone had done something sweet around him?
She blinked again. The shivering hadn’t stopped yet and he could tell why. The wind was biting through his thin knit black jumper. It didn’t matter he had a shirt underneath. It had been a long time since he’d felt this cold.
She bit her bottom lip. ‘I…I sometimes forget that other people don’t like Christmas. I should have been more sensitive. I should have thought things through.’ A tear slid down her cheek. ‘Did you come up here to fire me?’
‘What? No.’ He couldn’t believe it. That was the last thing on his mind right now.
She looked confused. ‘But you said…you said—’
‘Forget what I said,’ he cut in. ‘I was being an idiot. I’m tired. I haven’t slept in three days. I’m sorry—I know it’s no excuse.’
‘I’m sorry about your wife,’ she whispered.
It came out of the blue. Entirely unexpected.
Sweeping through him like the brisk breeze of cold air around him.
It was the waver in her voice. He’d heard this a thousand times over the last few years. Most of the times the words had seemed meaningless. Automatically said by people who were sometimes sincere, sometimes not.
This woman—Grace—hadn’t known his wife at all. But there was something about her—something he couldn’t quite put his finger on. It was as if she knew mourning, she knew loss. It was probably the sincerest he’d ever heard those words spoken and it twigged a little part inside him.
He stepped back a little. He stepped back and sucked in a breath, letting the cold air sear the inside of his lungs. She was staring at him again. Something about this woman’s vulnerable eyes did things to him.
He wanted to protect her. He wanted to make sure that no one hurt her. There was something else. It wasn’t sympathy in her eyes.
He couldn’t stand the look of sympathy. It only filled him with rage and self-loathing.
A tear slid down her cheek and the wave of protectiveness that was simmering beneath the surface washed over him completely.
He couldn’t help himself. He reached up with his thumb and brushed it away, feeling the coolness of her smooth skin beneath the tip.
He stepped closer again. ‘Don’t,’ he said quickly, his voice rising above a whisper. ‘I’m sorry I made you feel like this.’ He wanted to glance away—to have the safety of looking out over the capital’s skyline—but Grace’s chocolate gaze pulled him in. His hand was still at the side of her face. She hadn’t pulled away. ‘I meant what I said.’ He pressed his lips together. ‘Christmas brings out the worst in me. It just brings back too many memories. And I know…I know that not everyone feels like that. I know that maybe…just maybe I should be able to get past this.’ A picture swam into his head and he let out a wry laugh. ‘As for the Christmas decorations in the hotel? They might be a little on the sparse side.’
It was the oddest situation. The most bizarre he’d ever found himself in. The irony of it almost killed him. If someone had told him twenty-four hours ago that he’d end up on the roof of his hotel, in the snow, with a strange, enigmatic woman who was causing the shades to start to fall away from his eyes after five years, he would have laughed in their face.
He wasn’t joking about the sparseness of the hotel. Rob Speirs had emailed to say some of the guests were complaining about the lack of Christmas spirit. Rob had also dropped a few hints that it was bad for business.
Grace’s eyebrows arched. The edges of her lips turned upwards. ‘You think?’
He put his arm around her shoulders. ‘It’s freezing out here—and only one of us has a coat. Let’s go back inside.’
She hesitated for the tiniest second then gave a shiver and a nod as they started walking to the door. ‘So you can fire me in comfort?’
‘Less of the firing thing. Are you going to bring this up all the time?’
She nodded. ‘Probably.’
He pulled open the door. ‘How about we go downstairs for some hot chocolate and you can tell me more about Maids in Chelsea? I have it on good authority you’ve got a fan in Mrs Archer.’
Grace nodded. ‘I thought you were tired. You said you hadn’t slept in three days. You don’t need to talk to me. We can just call it quits and I’ll go home now.’
He shook his head as they stepped inside and walked down the stairs. ‘Oh, no. You don’t get off that easy. We have things to discuss.’
‘We do?’
She sounded surprised. He swiped a key fob next to the elevator and the doors swished open. He gestured with his hand for her to go inside. ‘You don’t want to have hot chocolate with me?’
He made it sound light-hearted. He wanted to try and make amends for his earlier behaviour. But the truth was his curiosity was piqued by Grace.
She gave him a cheeky stare. ‘Only if there are marshmallows and cream. I get the impression you might be a bit of a cheapskate.’
He laughed as she walked into the elevator and for the first time in five years something happened.
It had been so long he almost didn’t recognise it.
His heart gave a little leap.
Grace wasn’t quite sure what to make of any of this. One minute Mr Film Star looks was firing her in his gravelly Scottish voice, the next minute he was apologising and making her heart completely stop when he touched her cheek.
It was the weirdest feeling. She’d been beyond cold—but the touch of his finger on her cheek had been like a little flame sending pulses around her body.
They stood in silence as the elevator moved silently to the ground floor. Frank caught sight of them as they walked out into the foyer, but Finlay didn’t give them time to talk. He ushered her through to one of the private sitting rooms, speaking to a waitress on the way past.
They sat down on the comfortable black velvet-covered chairs. She ran her hand over the material. ‘Black. Nice,’ she said as she watched his face.
He shook his head. ‘I feel that you might be going to make me pay.’
The strange wariness she’d felt around him had seemed to vanish. She’d seen something up on that roof. Something she’d never seen in another person.
For a few moments it had felt as if she could see right into his soul. His pain. His hurt. His bitterness.
He seemed to be at a point in his life that she couldn’t even begin to understand.
‘Me? Make you pay? Whatever makes you think that?’
He put one elbow on the table and leaned on his hand. He did still look tired, but there was a little sparkle in those blue eyes. When Finlay Armstrong wasn’t being so businesslike and generally miserable, he showed tiny glimmers of a sense of humour.
The good looks were still there. Now she wasn’t so flabbergasted she could see them clearly. In fact, in the bright lights of the hotel his handsome features might even be a bit intimidating.
But there was something about that accent—that Scottish burr—that added something else to the mix. When she’d first heard it—that fierceness—its tone of don’t ever cross me had had her shaking in her shoes. Now, there was a softness. A warmth about the tone.
He held out his arms to the room they were sitting in. ‘I chose black and grey deliberately. I liked the smoothness, sleekness and no-nonsense look of the hotel. White would have been clinical. Any other colour just a distraction that would age quickly. Black and grey are pretty timeless colours.’
‘If you can call them colours.’
The waitress appeared and set down steaming hot chocolates, adorned with marshmallows and cream, and long spoons. The aroma drifted up instantly. After the coldness of outside the instant warmth was comforting.
Finlay spooned some of the cream from his hot chocolate into his mouth and gave a loud sigh. ‘I’m guessing you don’t like my interior design selections.’
Grace smiled and tried to catch some of her marshmallows before they melted. ‘I bet they cost more money than I could earn in ten years.’
He stopped stirring his hot chocolate and looked at her.
She cringed. Did she really mean to say that out loud?
The marshmallows-and-cream assortment was all sticking together inside her mouth. Any minute now she would start choking. She took another quick sip of the hot chocolate in an attempt to melt some of the marshmallows before she needed emergency treatment. Seemed as if she’d brought enough attention to herself already.
‘How would you like to earn some more money?’
Too late. She coughed and spluttered everywhere. Did he really just say that?
As quickly as the words left his mouth and Grace started choking, Finlay Armstrong started to laugh.
He did. The guy actually started laughing. He leaned over and started giving her back a few slaps, trying to stop her choking. He was shaking his head. ‘I didn’t mean that. I didn’t mean anything like that. It’s okay, Grace. You don’t need to fake a medical emergency and escape in an ambulance.’
The choking started to subside and Finlay signalled over to one of the waitresses to bring some water. He was still laughing.
Her cheeks were warm. No, her cheeks were red hot. Between choking to death and thinking completely inappropriate thoughts she couldn’t be any more embarrassed if she tried.
Because she had thought inappropriate thoughts—even if it had been for just a millisecond.
She hadn’t had enough time to figure out if she was mortally offended and insulted, or just completely and utterly stunned.
A bartender in a sleek black dress came over with a bottle of water and some glasses with ice. She shot Finlay her best sultry smile as she poured the water for them both. Grace got a look of disdain. Perfect.
The water-pouring seemed to take for ever. She could almost hear some sultry backtrack playing behind them.
Finlay was polite but reserved. The bartender got the briefest of thanks, then he turned his attention back to Grace. It was hard not to grab the glass and gulp the water down. She waited until the water was finally poured, then gave her most equally polite smile and took some eager sips.
She cleared her throat. ‘I didn’t think that, you know,’ she said quickly.
Finlay laughed even harder than before. ‘Yes.’ He nodded. ‘You did. My bad. The wrong choice of words. I didn’t mean that at all.’
She gulped again. Now they were out in public his conduct seemed a little different. He was laughing but there was more of a formality about him. This was his hotel and right now he was under the microscopic view of all his staff. He had a reputation to uphold. She got that. She did.
And right now his eyes didn’t show any hint of the vulnerability she’d glimpsed upstairs. Now, his eyes seemed like those of a worldly-wise businessman. One that had probably seen and done things she could only ever dream of.
All she knew about Finlay Armstrong was the little he’d told her. But Finlay had the self-assured aura that lots of self-made businessmen had.
The knowledge, the experience, the know-how and the confidence that a lot of the clients she’d met through Maids in Chelsea had. People who had lived entirely different lives from the one she had.
She set down her water and tried to compose herself again. Heat had finally started to permeate into her body. She could feel her fingers and toes.
She finally shook off Finlay’s coat. She’d forgotten it was around her shoulders. That was what the bartender had been staring at.
She tugged at her black shirt, straightening it a little, and put her hand up to her hair, trying to push it back into place.
Finlay was watching her with amusement. ‘Leave it—it’s fine. Let’s talk about something else.’
Grace shifted a little on the velvet chair. What on earth did he want to talk to her about?
His hands ran up and down the outside of the latte glass. ‘I’d like you to take on another role within the hotel.’
She sat up a bit more. Her curiosity was definitely piqued. ‘What do you mean?’
He held out his hands around the room. ‘You mentioned the lack of Christmas decorations and I think you might be right. Rob Speirs, my manager, mentioned there’s been a few complaints. He thinks it could be affecting business. It might be time to have a rethink.’
She tilted her head to the side. ‘You want me to bring up the stuff from the basement?’
He shook his head. ‘No. I don’t want any of the old decorations. I want new. I want you to look around and think of a theme for the hotel, something that gives the Christmas message while keeping the upmarket look that I like for the hotel.’
Grace’s mouth fell open. ‘What?’
He started a little. ‘And obviously I’ll pay you. A designer fee, plus a company credit card to cover all the costs and delivery of what you choose.’
Grace was having trouble believing this. He’d pulled the few decorations she’d put up in the penthouse down with his bare hands. He’d called them tacky. Now, he wanted her to decorate the whole hotel?
She couldn’t help the nervous laugh that sneaked out. ‘Finlay, do you know what date it is?’
He wrinkled his nose. ‘The sixteenth? The seventeenth of December? Sorry, I’ve crossed so many time zones lately I can’t keep track.’
She shook her head. ‘I don’t know for sure, but I’m guessing most of the other hotels decided on their Christmas schemes months ago—and ordered all their decorations. They’ve had their decorations up since the middle of November.’
Finlay shook his head. ‘That’s too early. Even the first day of December seems too soon.’
Grace leaned across the table towards him. ‘I’m not sure that what you have in mind and what I have in mind will be the same thing.’
‘What do you mean?’
She sighed and tried to find appropriate words. ‘Less than half an hour ago you told me you hated Christmas and everything about it. What’s changed your mind?’
The hesitation was written all over his face. Just as she’d done a few seconds earlier, he was trying to find the right words. She could almost see them forming on his lips. She held her breath. Then, just when he looked as if he might answer, he leaned forward and put his head in his hands.
Now she definitely couldn’t breathe. She pressed her lips together to stop herself from filling the silence.
When Finlay looked up again, it wasn’t the polished businessman she’d been sitting opposite for the last twenty minutes. This was Finlay, the guy on the roof who’d lost his wife and seemed to lose himself in the process. What little oxygen supplies she had left sucked themselves out into the atmosphere in a sharp burst at the unhidden pain in his eyes.
‘It’s time.’ His voice cracked a little and his shoulders sagged as if the weight that had been pressing him down had just done its last, awful deed.
She couldn’t help herself. She didn’t care about appropriateness. She didn’t care about talk. Grace had always had a big heart. She always acted on instinct. She slid her hand across the glass-topped table and put it over his.
It didn’t matter that the word no had been forming on her lips. It didn’t matter that she felt completely out of her depth and had no qualifications for the position he wanted to give her. She squeezed his hand and looked him straight in the eye, praying that her tears wouldn’t pool again.
He gave himself a shake and straightened up. ‘And it’s a business decision.’ He pulled his hand back.
She gave him a cautious smile. ‘If you’re sure—and it’s a business decision,’ she threw in, even though she didn’t believe it, ‘the answer is yes.’
He leaned back against the chair, his shoulders straightening a little.
‘I have to warn you,’ she continued, ‘that the picture you see in your head might not match the picture I have in mine.’
She glanced across the room and gave him a bigger smile. ‘I can absolutely promise you that no matter how sleek, no matter how modern you think they are—there will be no black Christmas trees in The Armstrong hotel.’
The shadows fell a little from his eyes. ‘There won’t?’
There was the hint of a teasing tone in his voice. As if he was trying his best to push himself back from the place he’d found himself in.
‘My Christmas could never have black trees. I’ll do my best to keep things in the style you like. But think of Christmas as a colour burst. A rainbow shower.’ She held up one hand as she tried to imagine what she could do. ‘A little sparkle on a gloomy day.’
Finlay nodded in agreement. ‘I’ll get you a credit card. Is there anything else you need?’
She licked her lips. Her throat was feeling dry. What had she just got herself into?
Her brain started to whizz. ‘Use of a phone. And a computer. A space in one of the offices if you can.’
Finlay stood up. ‘I can do that.’
It seemed the businessman persona had slotted back into place. Then, there was a tiny flicker of something behind his eyes.
He smiled and held out his hand towards her.
She stood up nervously and shook his hand.
‘Grace Ellis, welcome to The Armstrong Hotel.’
CHAPTER THREE
‘WHAT’S WRONG WITH you today?’ asked Alice.
Grace was staring out of the window, lack of sleep making her woozy.
She turned her attention back to Alice. ‘Nothing, I’m sorry. I’m just a little tired.’
Alice narrowed her gaze with a sly smile on her face. ‘I’ve seen that kind of distracted look before—just not on you.’
Grace finished making the bed and turned to face Alice. ‘I don’t know what you mean.’
The last thing she wanted to do was admit to Alice the reasons that sleep had evaded her. It would be easy to say it was excitement about the job offer. Stress about whether she could actually do the job. But the truth was—while they might have contributed—the main sleep stealer had been the face that kept invading her mind every few seconds.
There was something so enigmatic about Finlay Armstrong. It wasn’t just the traditional good looks, blue eyes and sexy Scottish accent. It was something so much more.
And there was no way she could be the only one that felt it.
A successful businessman like Finlay Armstrong must have women the world over trying to put themselves on his radar.
She had no idea how he behaved in private. Five years was a long time. Had he had any hook ups since his wife died? Probably. Surely?
She didn’t even want to think like that.
It was just…that moment…that moment on the roof. The expression in his eyes. The way he’d looked at her when he’d reached up and touched her cheek.
Grace hadn’t wanted to acknowledge how low she’d been feeling up there. She hadn’t wanted to admit how she was missing her gran so much it felt like a physical pain.
But for a few seconds—up on that roof—she’d actually thought about something else.
She’d actually only thought about Finlay Armstrong.
‘Grace?’ Alice Archer had walked over and touched her arm.
‘Oh, sorry, Alice. I was miles away.’
Alice raised her eyebrows. ‘And where was that exactly?’
Grace bit her lip and pulled some folded papers from her white apron. ‘I’ve to help choose some Christmas decorations for the hotel. I was up half the night trying to find something appropriate.’
Alice gave a little smile and reached her thin hand over to look at the printouts. Grace swallowed. She could see the blue veins under Alice’s pale skin. A few of her knuckle joints were a little gnarled. They must give her pain—but she never complained. Another reminder of how much she missed her gran.
Alice glanced over the pictures, her eyes widening at a few. Grace had spent hours tracking down themes and stockists for particular items. All of them at costs that made her blink.
Alice gave her a thoughtful look as she handed the pictures back. She patted Grace’s hand. ‘I’m sure whatever you choose will be perfect. It will be nice to have some Christmas cheer around the hotel.’
Grace couldn’t help but smile. ‘Christmas cheer, that’s exactly what I’m trying to capture. Something to make people get in the spirit.’
Alice walked over to her Louis XV velvet-covered chair and sank down with a wince.
‘Are you okay? Are you hurting?’
Alice shook her head proudly and folded her hands in her lap. ‘No. I’m not sore, Grace. I’m just old. I’ll have some lemon tea now, if you please.’
‘Of course.’ Grace hurried over to complete their morning ritual. She sliced the fresh lemon and prepared the tea, boiling the water and carrying the tray with the china teapot and cup and saucer over to the table at Alice’s elbow.
Alice gave a grateful sigh. Her make-up was still impeccable but her eyes were tired this morning. ‘Maybe you should have some help? Someone to give you some confidence in your decisions.’
Grace was surprised. ‘Do you want to come with me? You’re more than welcome to. I would be glad of the company.’
Alice laughed and shook her head. ‘Oh, no. I don’t mean me. I was thinking more of someone else…someone else who could use a little Christmas spirit.’
Grace had poured the tea and was about to hand the cup and saucer to Alice but her hand wobbled. She knew exactly who Alice was hinting about.
‘I don’t think that would be appropriate. He’s far too busy. He’s far too immersed in his work. He wouldn’t have time for anything like that.’
She shifted uncomfortably. She had a pink shirt hanging up in her locker, ready to change into once she’d finished her chambermaid duties. Alice was staring at her with those steady grey eyes. It could be a little unnerving. It was as if she could see into Grace’s head and see all the secret weird thoughts she’d been having about Finlay Armstrong since last night.
Gran had been a bit like that too. She’d always seemed to know what Grace was going to say before she even said it. Even when she’d been twelve years old and her friend had stolen a box of chocolates from the local shop. The associated guilt had nearly made Grace sick, and she’d only been home and under Gran’s careful gaze for ten minutes before she’d spilled everything.