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In Xenon’s world there had been relatives—far too many of them in her opinion—and servants, who had all doted on him. He’d never had to go to the police station to bail out his drunken mother and then to lie about it to social services, terrified that the family would be split up if the truth ever emerged. He’d never had to hold a terrified and sobbing child who had woken up from yet another nightmare to discover that the real world could be infinitely worse.
‘You don’t understand,’ she said.
‘Oh, I think I do,’ he said coldly. ‘Jason has found that the well of easy money you’ve always provided has run dry—so who better to turn to than his wealthy brother-in-law?’
The thudding of her heart increased. ‘What does he want money for?’
‘Why do you think? To mop up the mess he’s made of his life with his gambling addiction.’
Lexi closed her eyes as a terrible sense of inevitability crept over her. She’d tried everything to help Jason with his gambling habit. In the early days she had sat down and talked to him and he had lied through his teeth and told her he’d quit. She’d believed every word he’d said as she’d signed over yet another cheque supposed to help put him back on the straight and narrow. Or maybe she had just wanted to believe it. Later, she had paid for the first of many visits to the rehab clinic—until he was kicked out of the last one for starting up a poker school with his fellow patients.
She opened her eyes to find Xenon studying her. ‘I expect that you told him no and sent him away,’ she said. ‘In fact, I’m rather hoping you did. The last counsellor I spoke to told me that I should “withdraw with love”.’ She saw the perplexed look on Xenon’s face as he heard the term and she remembered how disparaging he’d been about people who had sought professional help for their problems. ‘It means you have to stop giving him money and bailing him out. It’s supposed to make him take control of his own life.’
‘Actually, I didn’t send him away.’
‘You didn’t give him money?’ Her voice rose in alarm. ‘That’s what’s known in the business as “enabling”.’
‘I don’t give a damn what it’s known as!’ he bit out. ‘I’m more concerned with the consequences of his actions.’
Her fear growing by the second, Lexi blinked at him from behind her glasses. ‘What are you talking about?’
‘I’m talking about the fact that Jason has borrowed money. Lots of it. Against your name—and against mine as it happens, since we are still legally married and the Kanellis connection is like liquid gold.’ Resolutely, he ignored the horrified widening of her eyes. ‘He has built up the kind of debts which made even my eyes water—and I’m no stranger to large sums of money—’
‘How much?’ she butted in.
He told her and Lexi blanched because she didn’t have that kind of money. Not any more.
‘And the kind of people he’s borrowed it from tend to get rather...angry if they don’t get their loans back,’ he continued.
Lexi’s hand flew to her mouth. She could feel the hot rush of breath against her fingers as Xenon’s blue gaze iced into her. ‘What are we going to do?’
Xenon nodded as a grim feeling of satisfaction washed over him, because that was the first sensible thing she’d said. We. ‘It looks like I’m going to have to pay off his debt for him—’
‘But—’
‘There’s no alternative, unless you happen to have the money sitting stashed away. That is, unless you want his pretty face altered out of all recognition?’ His eyelashes suddenly narrowed, so that his eyes looked like shards of blue ice. ‘These people can be dangerous, you know.’
Lexi knew about danger. She’d grown up surrounded by it. And hadn’t that been one of the best things about her sudden fame—that she’d been able to escape from the dark and seedy side of life? The last thing she wanted was for Jason to be catapulted back to that place, where nothing seemed safe. She looked at Xenon’s hard features, realising that he was offering to help. ‘Thank you.’
‘Don’t thank me until you’ve heard what it entails,’ he said. ‘I’ll pay off his debt for him—but this time, he doesn’t go back to his old life and repeat the same old pattern. And neither does he go into some fancy clinic where he uses that abundance of Gibson charm to manipulate his counsellors.’
‘So what are you proposing he does?’ she questioned. ‘Apply for a personality transplant?’
‘Nothing quite so drastic. My solution is simple. He needs to change. To work his body like a man. To see the sun come up in the morning and put his head on the pillow at night, instead of spending it in the casino, like a zombie.’ His eyes bored into her. ‘And maybe he wants to change because he has agreed to go to work for one my cousins in Greece.’
‘Are you serious?’
‘On one of the family’s vineyards,’ he continued. ‘Your darling brother has agreed to do some hard, physical labour for the first time in his life.’
She stared at him in disbelief. ‘He’s agreed?’
‘I didn’t give him very much choice in the matter,’ he snapped. ‘It was my condition for bailing him out.’
Lexi felt a worrying see-saw of emotions as she took in what he’d just told her. He could be so hard and indomitable that it was all too easy to forget his streak of kindness.
But he hadn’t been kind when she’d most needed him to be, had he? He hadn’t been there for her at all when she’d reached out for him. He had pushed her away until there had been nothing but distance left between them any more.
‘So...why come here and tell me all this?’ she questioned.
He gave a cold, hard smile. ‘No ideas, Lex? You think I should bail out your brother just out of the goodness of my heart?’
She met the obdurate look in his eyes and a whisper of fear began to creep over her skin as she realised what lay behind his words. ‘You mean...there’s a price?’
‘There is always a price,’ he said softly. ‘I would have thought you’d have learned that by now. And the price is that I want you back as my wife.’
Lexi’s lips opened as if in slow motion, though no words emerged. She could feel the sudden thunder of her heart and a great rush of unexpected excitement because hadn’t some rogue part of her always dreamt of just this moment? That Xenon would come back and tell her he was willing to forgive her for walking out. Willing perhaps to try again.
But even as hope flared inside her with a bright, sharp heat, she forced herself to quash it. Because their marriage could never be saved. She knew that. The past held too much sorrow and there could be no future. They might go through the motions of reconciliation—but now a darkness lay at the heart of what they’d once had. And Xenon would never be able to tolerate it.
‘Your wife?’ she echoed.
His mouth hardened. ‘There’s no need to look so horrified,’ he said. ‘It’s purely a short-term measure.’
Lexi only just stopped herself from shuddering at her own foolishness, terrified that he would know the crazy thoughts she’d been entertaining. Did she really think that Xenon would be willing to try again? That a man that proud and powerful would be willing to forget the fact that she’d ‘humiliated’ him with her desertion.
Blankly, she stared at him. ‘But why? Why on earth would you want to resurrect our marriage?’
Xenon watched the way she lifted her shoulders in confusion and the gesture made the fabric of her shirt ride over the generous curve of her breasts. The eyes behind her glasses were the silver-green colour of eucalyptus leaves—only right now they were dark with bewilderment. And suddenly he felt a stab of lust so powerful that he could have pressed her down onto the carpet and made her come alive in his arms.
‘My sister is having her baby daughter christened and I want you beside me.’
The impact of his words was like a series of small, sharp knives aimed straight at her heart. It hurt to think of his sister managing to produce the first of the next generation. It shouldn’t have done, but it did. For her to have succeeded where she herself had failed so badly somehow seemed to bring it all back again. ‘I...I’d heard Kyra was married, of course,’ she stumbled. ‘And that she was pregnant. It just all seems to have happened so quickly.’
He gave a short laugh. ‘It was a whirlwind romance, it’s true. But you’ve been gone two years now, Lex. Or did you imagine that the world would stop turning the moment you walked out of my door?’
Lexi’s breath was coming in shallow and rapid little bursts. For a minute she actually felt faint. Concentrate on the facts, she told herself. Try to talk him out of this insanity. ‘Why would you want me there when we’re divorcing? When my attendance there would only excite gossip and comment?’ She fixed him with a look of appeal, as if from one reasonable person to another. ‘Surely you don’t want that, Xenon?’
‘It’s not just the christening,’ he said and now his voice took on a dark and sombre note. ‘My grandmother is ill. In fact, she’s very ill and they’ve brought forward the christening, even if she’s not actually well enough to attend.’
Despite everything, Lexi’s heart turned over. ‘I’m sorry to hear that,’ she said. ‘I know how much you love your grandmother. But your family won’t want me there, Xenon—especially not at such an emotional time. Your mother always thought I was the worst possible wife you could have chosen. You know that. And that kind of feeling could spoil the atmosphere and ruin the day for Kyra. What’s it going to be like if I suddenly waltz back to Rhodes on your arm?’
‘My family will do what I want them to do,’ he stated flatly. ‘And I want you there.’
Lexi glared. How could she have forgotten his controlling nature? His desire to make everything in the world happen the way that he wanted it to? ‘You still haven’t answered my question, Xenon. Why me, after everything that’s happened? There must be hundreds of women who would make more suitable partners. Your little black book was certainly bursting at the seams before I came along.’
‘But you were the only woman I married. And my marriage is the only thing in my life which could be considered a failure.’ His eyes were steely now. They gleamed with a determination she recognised only too well. ‘I don’t like failure—perceived or otherwise—and it will make my grandmother happy to see us together again. She believes in marriage. At the end of her life it will please her to discover that her favourite grandson is back with his wife.’
‘But that’s...that’s dishonest.’
‘More dishonest than you promising to love and to cherish me, until death us do part? Were you remembering those vows when you walked out and broke them?’
To Lexi, this was nothing but a cold-blooded manipulation of the truth, but she bit back her objections. What was the point of trying to reason with him when he would tie her up in knots with his clever, educated arguments? She wouldn’t go to pieces in front of him. She couldn’t afford to. She needed to be strong. ‘I won’t do it, Xenon,’ she said quietly.
‘But you don’t have a choice. Not if you want to save your brother’s skin. I suggest you think about it.’ His coffee barely touched, he rose to his feet. ‘I’ll give you until tomorrow lunchtime to make up your mind.’
She watched him as he walked over to the door and Lexi felt like a person clinging to the edge of a cliff whose fingers were slowly slipping. Suddenly the once solid surface of her life was crumbling away and she was losing her grip.
‘And if I don’t?’
His smile was as cold as steel. ‘Then I throw your brother to the wolves.’
CHAPTER TWO
THE NIGHT SEEMED endless and Lexi spent most of it awake, shivering like someone with a fever although the July air was warm. Her nerves felt shot and when the first pale light of dawn began to appear, she gave up all attempts to sleep and pulled back the curtains to watch the sun rise.
But it was difficult to concentrate on anything—even the explosion of light outside her window, which normally filled her with pleasure. Seeing her estranged husband again had stirred up all kinds of feelings—feelings she’d done her best to suppress after the end to her marriage. She’d felt devastated and bereft when it had failed, even though people had done their best to reassure her. They’d said that was the way everyone felt when a marriage ended and she knew that to some extent that was true. But Lexi’s pain had been compounded by the loss of their baby.
The thought of that tiny lost scrap of life was still painful and so she got up and dressed before taking herself outside for a walk. Cutting across the fields at the back of the cottage, she walked towards the sea until she had reached the shoreline. The tide was out and it was early enough to still be deserted—with only a lone dog walker striding across the sands.
Her life had taken so many twists along the way. It hadn’t turned out the way she’d expected it to—but then, whose life ever did? She had settled in this beautiful part of Devon, an existence which some might have considered dull—but Lexi revelled in the peace and quiet she’d found here after the high-octane experiences of her past.
But she still had responsibilities, no matter how much she sometimes wished she could shrug them off. She’d been a quasi mother to her two siblings. Jake was in Australia now and seemed to be forging a successful career for himself. But Jason was a different story. She’d been at her wit’s end with his ongoing problems. She’d thought—hoped—that the reason she hadn’t been able to get hold of him had been because he was sorting himself out. Only it seemed that his problems were much worse than she’d thought.
She bent to pick up a shell as she thought about the possibility that her little brother could be in danger and the solution which Xenon was offering.
There is always a price, he had said in that very Greek way of his. And surely the price was too high. How could she bear to spend time pretending to be his wife when barely an hour in his company had left her wanting to climb the walls?
Yet could she deny her brother this chance because she didn’t have the guts to face the man she’d married? What was she so afraid of?
Him. She was afraid of Xenon and the way he made her feel. She was afraid of the things he made her want. Things she could never give him.
She put the shell in her pocket and headed for home. The breeze had whipped her hair into a wild frizz, but at least her cheeks had gained some colour by the time she got back to the cottage. She tried ringing Jason but as usual his phone was switched off and her imagination began to work overtime, and to scare her.
If she denied him this chance for selfish reasons, then wouldn’t she spend her life waiting for the knock on the door? The sombre voices of the police telling her that her baby brother had been found in a ditch somewhere?
She picked up the phone and dialled Xenon’s number, only to be told that he was in a meeting. But when she gave her name, the tone of the woman answering seemed to change and there was a click before Xenon himself came on the line.
‘Lex?’
Still taken aback by the fact that he’d actually interrupted a meeting to speak to her, Lexi forced herself to respond. ‘Yes, it’s me.’
‘You’ve made a decision?’
‘I have.’ She kept her voice low and her answers short—afraid she would betray some kind of emotion if she said too much. And the most stupid emotion of all was the hunger welling up inside her. The terrible aching deep in her heart, which made her long for the love they’d once shared.
Maybe it was because the telephone could sometimes play tricks with you. Speaking to someone without seeing the look in their eyes could make you feel as if nothing awful had ever happened. That you were still the same two people who would meet at the end of the day. Suddenly, it was frighteningly easy to imagine him pulling her into his arms and kissing her. Holding her tightly against his big, strong body as he’d done at the beginning. When for the first time in her life she’d felt safe.
She gave a wry smile. She should have known it was too good to be true. What was it that they said? That the honeymoon never lasted. And they were right. Because almost as soon as they had returned from their trip to Rhodes, her husband had given himself over to his real love. The work which defined him and drove him and which had made him one of the world’s most successful businessmen.
‘I’m waiting, Lex,’ came the sound of his impatient voice in her ear.
‘You know that I don’t want to do it,’ she said. ‘And I’m asking you to reconsider.’
‘Ochi. Can’t be done. You will do what I want you to do.’
‘You’re a ruthless man, Xenon Kanellis.’
‘Insult me all you like,’ he said. ‘But my heart will not be swayed by your pleas.’
‘You have no heart!’
‘Then waste no more of my time with your futile protestations. Give me your answer, Lex—is it yes or no?’
There was a pause while she tried to fight it, but she realised she had no choice. ‘Yes,’ she breathed reluctantly.
‘Good.’
She heard the unmistakeable triumph in his voice. She could imagine him sitting in the chair at his desk, swivelling it around so that he could gaze out at the London skyline. And she could have screamed.
‘We need to discuss practicalities,’ he was saying.
‘I agree.’ She drew in a deep breath because this bit was much better done on the phone, away from the calculating gleam of his eyes. ‘So let’s kick off by saying that this is not going to be a real marriage in any sense of the word. Let’s call it a masquerade, shall we? The mask I’ll wear in public won’t come off in private. Do you understand?’
‘I think it’s a consideration which can be discussed at a future date,’ he answered smoothly. ‘When can you be here? Tomorrow?’
‘Are you out of your mind?’ Lexi gripped the telephone. ‘I can’t just pack up and go! There are things I need to take care of. It may surprise you to know that I have a life here.’
There was a pause. ‘Or a man? An eager lover you can’t bear to leave behind?’
Lexi almost laughed at how far he was from the truth. How she would have loved to tell him that, yes, there was a man. Someone who thrilled her whenever he touched her, as Xenon had always thrilled her. But there had been no one else. Sometimes she doubted that there ever would be. ‘I’m sure that your spies must have reported back to you that currently there’s no man.’
‘Currently?’ he echoed.
‘None of your damned business. One of the perks of being separated is that it means you’re free to start dating.’
She heard what sounded like Xenon trying to control his angry breathing and she gave a small smile of satisfaction.
‘Don’t push me too hard,’ he growled. ‘What do you need to take care of?’
‘Well, there’s my goldfish, for a start. There’s also my jewellery business. I may work for myself but I still have some commissions which I need to finish. When is...?’ The lump which had suddenly risen out of nowhere now lodged itself deep in her throat. ‘When is the christening?’
‘Next week. I’ll send my car for you on Friday and we’ll fly out on Saturday. Make sure you’re ready at noon,’ he said, and cut the connection.
Lexi was left clutching the phone, her hand shaking with rage. He was so authoritative. So used to getting what he wanted. He hadn’t even given her a chance to tell him that she would drive herself up to London. Or should she just let herself be whisked away in his fancy, chauffeur-driven car—no doubt in a demonstration of how easily he could flex his power?
She drew in a deep breath, knowing that she shouldn’t sweat the small stuff. She was doing this for Jason—and all she had to do was to get through it.
She spent the rest of the week finishing up her commissions and thinking about whether she should make something for Kyra’s baby. It would make sense and at least it would guarantee that her gift would be unique.
Her career as a jeweller was building slowly, but surely—though at the moment it was confined mainly to locals, with the occasional holidaymaker. Learning how to make silver jewellery had been one of the best decisions she’d ever made. She’d liked the combination of the practical and the artistic and it still thrilled her every time someone liked one of her designs enough to buy one.
Just last week an old man had ordered a chunky brooch for his wife, to celebrate fifty years of marriage. He obviously enjoyed chatting and started telling Lexi all about his long-ago wedding day. She had felt herself getting emotional as his rheumy old eyes welled up with tears and she thought it made her own marital record of two years seem like a mockery.
Picking up a lump of silver, she thought again about the new baby and, although she always steered clear of designing for infants on the grounds that it was too painful, she set to work. Because she had adored Xenon’s little sister and she had felt almost guilty that the breakdown of her marriage meant that communication with her had been severed. Somehow this handmade gift for Kyra’s firstborn seemed important, and significant. She worked long into the night and most of the next day too, until she had fashioned the small silver charm to her satisfaction.
On Friday, she had only just closed up her workshop and finished packing when Xenon’s car arrived. Lexi tried not to be intimidated by the female driver who jumped out of the luxury limousine to open the door for her, but it wasn’t easy. The wafer-thin woman who introduced herself as Charlotte certainly made her fitted uniform look sexy. Lexi started wondering if there was anything going on between her and Xenon, until she remembered his strict rule about fraternising with the staff. He’d told her it was an important lesson his father had taught him: that you should never sleep with someone you might one day have to sack.
She pushed the thought away, troubled by how much it bothered her. Because it shouldn’t bother her. Xenon could sleep with who he liked. They were separated. They were getting a divorce.
She spent the journey watching as countryside morphed into city and her stomach contracted with apprehension as the car drew up outside the gleaming monolithic tower of the Kanellis headquarters.
She gazed up at the plate-glass-and-steel building, reluctantly remembering the last time she had been here. It had been at some company ‘do’ when the cracks were already beginning to appear in their marriage.
Xenon had been tired and fractious. He’d been working away—again—and had come to the party straight from the airport. He had eyed the close-fitting cocktail dress she’d been wearing with the expression of a hungry lion being offered a piece of raw meat and had then proceeded to accuse her of flirting with another man. As if. He didn’t seem to get that no other man existed for her. She remembered him being angry in the car afterwards and then she’d been angry right back, complaining that he always made her feel like some sort of object or possession. The simmering silence in which they’d sat had grown ever-more resentful, but that hadn’t stopped him from practically ripping off her dress the moment they’d arrived home. Or her doing the same with his trousers...
Her breath already dry in her throat, Lexi reached down for her suitcase, but Charlotte must have been watching from the driver’s mirror.
‘Don’t worry about that, Mrs Kanellis. I’ll take care of your case,’ she said.
Lexi wondered if it was worth going to the trouble of explaining that she no longer used her married name, but decided not to bother. ‘Thanks very much.’ She gave the young woman a warm smile. ‘You’re a great driver.’
But her nerves returned when she went into the building, her footsteps clicking as she made her way across the marbled foyer to the executive lift. Stroking her clammy palms down over her dress, she tried not to feel claustrophobic as she rode up towards Xenon’s penthouse office. The smoked mirrors threw back distorted images of her face and the dress she wore seemed to have leeched all the colour from her skin and she suddenly felt terribly provincial. It was a long time since she had been somewhere like this, somewhere where you could almost smell the scent of money.