Hold Me, Cowboy

But just because he’d fantasized about it before, didn’t mean he had ever anticipated doing it. It didn’t mean that he should take her up on it now.

Still, the closer she got to him, the less likely it seemed that he was going to say no.

“I think that after ten years of celibacy a man could make the argument that you don’t know what you want, Madison West.”

Her eyes narrowed, glittering blue diamonds that looked like they could cut a man straight down to the bone. “I’ve always known what I wanted. I may not have always made the best decisions, but I was completely certain that I wanted them. At the time.”

His lips tipped upward. “I’m just going to be another at the time, Maddy. Nothing else.”

“That was the entire point of this weekend. For me to have something that didn’t have consequences. For me to get a little bit of something for myself. Is that so wrong? Do I have to live a passionless existence because I made a mistake once? Am I going to question myself forever? I just need to... I need to rip the Band-Aid off.”

“The Band-Aid?”

“The sex Band-Aid.”

He nodded, pretending that he understood. “Okay.”

“I want this,” she said, her tone confident.

“Are you...suggesting...that I give you...sexual healing?”

She made a scoffing sound. “Don’t make it sound cheesy. This is very serious. I would never joke about my sexual needs.” She let out an exasperated sigh. “I’m doing this wrong. I’m just...”

Suddenly, she launched herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her lips against his. The moment she did it, it was like the strike of a hammer against hot iron. As rigid as he’d been before—in that moment, he bent. And easily.

Staying seated in the chair, he curved himself around Madison, wrapping his arms around her body, sliding his hands over her back, down to the sweet indent of her waist, farther still to the flare of those pretty hips. The hips he had thought about taking hold of so many times before.

There was no hesitation now. None at all. There was only this. Only her. Only the soft, intoxicating taste of her on his tongue. Sugar, Jack Daniel’s and something that was entirely Maddy.

Too rich for his blood. Far too expensive for a man like him. It didn’t matter what he became. Didn’t matter how much money he had in his bank account, he would always be what he was. There was no escaping it. Nobody knew. Not really. Not the various women who had graced his bed over the years, not his brother, Chase.

Nobody knew Sam McCormack.

At least, nobody alive.

Neither, he thought, would Madison West. This wasn’t about knowing anybody. This was just about satisfying a need. And he was simple enough to take her up on that.

He wedged his thigh up between her legs, pressing his palm down on her lower back, encouraging her to flex her hips in time with each stroke of his tongue. Encouraging her to satisfy that ache at the apex of her thighs.

Her head fell back, her skin flushed and satisfaction grabbed him by the throat, gripping him hard and strong. It would’ve surprised him if he hadn’t suspected he was the sort of bastard who would get off on something like this.

Watching this beautiful, classy girl coming undone in his arms.

She was right. This weekend could be out of time. It could be a moment for them to indulge in things they would never normally allow themselves to have. The kinds of things that he had closed himself off from years ago.

Softness, warmth, touch.

He had denied himself all those things for years. Why not do this now? No one would know. No one would ever have to know. Maddy would see to that. She would never, no chance in hell, admit that she had gotten down and dirty with a man who was essentially a glorified blacksmith.

No way in hell.

That made them both safe. It made this safe. Well, as safe as fire this hot could be.

She bit his lip and he growled, pushing his hands up underneath the hem of her shirt, kissing her deeper as he let his fingertips roam to the line of her elegant spine, then tracing it upward until he found her bra, releasing it with ease, then dragging it and her top up over her head, leaving her naked from the waist up.

“I...” Her face was a bright shade of red. “I...I have lingerie. I wasn’t going to...”

“I don’t give a damn about your lingerie. I just want this.” He lowered his head, sliding his tongue around the perimeter of one of her tightened nipples. “I want your skin.” He closed his lips over that tight bud, sucking it in deep.

“I had a seduction plan,” she said, her voice trembling. He wasn’t entirely sure it was a protest, or even a complaint.

“You don’t plan passion, baby,” he said.

At least, he didn’t. Because if he were thinking clearly, he would be putting her top back on and telling her to go back to her ice-cold cabin, where she would be safe.

“I do,” she said, her teeth chattering in spite of the fact that it was very warm in the kitchen. “I plan everything.”

“Not this. You’re a dirty girl now, Madison West,” he said, sliding his thumb over her damp nipple, moving it in a slow circle until she arched her back and cried out. “You were going to sleep with another man this weekend, and you replaced him so damn easily. With me. Doesn’t even matter to you who you have. As long as you get a little bit. Is that how it is?”

She whimpered, biting her lip, rolling her hips against him.

“Good girl,” he said, his gut tightening, his arousal so hard he was sure he was going to burst through the front of his jeans. “I like that. I like you being dirty for me.”

He moved his hands then, curving his fingers around her midsection, his thumbs resting just beneath the swell of her breasts. She was so soft, so smooth, so petite and fragile. Everything he should never be allowed to put his hands on. But for some reason, instead of feeling a bolt of shame, he felt aroused. Hotter and harder than he could ever remember being. “You like that? My hands are rough. Maybe a little bit too rough for you.”

“No,” she said, and this time the protest was clear. “Not too rough for me at all.”

He slid his hands down her back, taking a moment to really revel in how soft she was and how much different he must feel to her. She squirmed against him, and he took that as evidence that she really did like it.

That only made him hotter. Harder. More impatient.

“You didn’t bring your damn candy and forget the condoms, did you?”

“No,” she said, the denial coming quickly. “I brought the condoms.”

“You always knew we would end up like this, didn’t you?”

She looked away from him, and the way she refused to meet his eyes turned a throwaway game of a question into something deadly serious.

“Madison,” he said, his voice hard. She still didn’t look at him. He grabbed hold of her chin, redirecting her face so that she was forced to make eye contact with him. “You knew this would happen all along, didn’t you?”

She still refused to answer him. Refused to speak.

“I think you did,” he continued. “I think that’s why you can never say a kind word to me. I think that’s why you acted like a scalded cat every time I walked into the room. Because you knew it would end here. Because you wanted this. Because you wanted me.”

Her expression turned even more mutinous.

“Madison,” he said, a warning lacing through the word. “Don’t play games with me. Or I’m not going to give you what you want. So you have to tell me. Tell me that you’ve always wanted me. You’ve always wanted my dirty hands on you. That’s why you hate me so damn much, isn’t it? Because you want me.”

“I...”

“Madison,” he said, his tone even more firm, “tell me—” he rubbed his hand over her nipple “—or I stop.”

“I wanted you,” she said, the admission rushed but clear all the same.

“More,” he said, barely recognizing his own voice. “Tell me more.”

It seemed essential suddenly, to know she’d wanted him. He didn’t know why. He didn’t care why.

“I’ve always wanted you. From the moment I first saw you. I knew that it would be like this. I knew that I would climb up into your lap and I would make a fool of myself rubbing all over you like a cat. I knew that from the beginning. So I argued with you instead.”

He felt a satisfied smile that curved his lips upward. “Good girl.” He lowered his hands, undoing the snap on her jeans and drawing the zipper down slowly. “You just made us both very happy.” He moved his fingertips down beneath the waistband of her panties, his breath catching in his throat when he felt hot wetness beneath his touch. It had been way too long since he felt a silky-smooth desirable woman. Had been way too long in his self-imposed prison.

Too long since he’d wanted at all.

But Madison wasn’t Elizabeth. And this wasn’t the same.

He didn’t need to think about her. He wasn’t going to. Not for the rest of the night.

He pushed every thought out of his mind and instead exulted in the sound that Madison made when he moved his fingers over that place where she was wet and aching for him. When he delved deeper, pushing one finger inside her, feeling just how close she was to the edge, evidenced by the way her internal muscles clenched around him. He could thrust into her here. Take her hard and fast and she would still come. He knew that she would.

But she’d had ten years of celibacy, and he was pushing on five. They deserved more. They deserved better. At the very least they deserved a damn bed.

With that in mind, he wrapped his arms more tightly around her, moving his hands to cup her behind as he lifted her, wrapping her legs tightly around him as he carried them across the kitchen and toward the stairs.

Maddy let out an inelegant squeak as he began to ascend toward the bedrooms. “This is really happening,” she said, sounding slightly dazed.

“I thought you said you weren’t drunk.”

“I’m not.”

“Then try not to look so surprised. It’s making me question things. And I don’t want to question things. I just want you.”

She shivered in his hold. “You’re not like most men I know.”

“Pretty boys with popped collars and pastel polo shirts? I must be a real disappointment.”

“Obviously you aren’t. Obviously I don’t care about men in pastel polo shirts or I would’ve gotten laid any number of times in the past decade.”

He pushed open the bedroom door, threw her down over the simply appointed bed that was far too small for the kind of acrobatics he wanted to get up to tonight. Then he stood back, admiring her, wearing nothing but those half-open jeans riding low on her hips, her stomach dipping in with each breath, her breasts thrust into greater prominence at the same time.

“Were you waiting for me?” He kept the words light, taunting, because he knew that she liked it.

She had always liked sparring with him. That was what they’d always done. Of course she would like it now. Of course he would like it now. Or maybe it had nothing to do with her. Maybe it had everything to do with the fact that he had years’ worth of dirty in him that needed to be let out.

“Screw you,” she said, pushing herself back farther up the mattress so that her head was resting on the pillow. Then she put her hands behind her head, her blue gaze sharp. “Come on, cowboy. Get naked for me.”

“Oh no, Maddy, you’re not running the show.”

“Ten years,” she said, her gaze level with his. “Ten years, Sam. That’s how long it’s been since I’ve seen a naked man. And let me tell you, I have never seen a naked man like you.” She held up a finger. “One man. One insipid man. He wasn’t even that good.”

“You haven’t had sex for ten years and your last lover wasn’t even good? I was sort of hoping that it had been so good you were waiting for your knees to stop shaking before you bothered to go out and get some again.”

“If only. My knees never once shook. In fact, they’re shaking harder now and you haven’t even gotten out of those pants yet.”

“You give good dirty talk.”

She lifted a shoulder. “I’m good at talking. That’s about the thing I’m best at.”

“Oh, I hope not, baby. I hope that mouth is good for a lot of other things too.”

He saw her breasts hitch. Her eyes growing round. Then he smiled, grabbing hold of the hem of his shirt and stripping it off over his head. Her reaction was more satisfying than he could’ve possibly anticipated. It’d been a long time since he’d seen a woman looking at him that way.

Sure, women checked him out. That happened all the time. But this was different. This was raw, open hunger. She wasn’t bothering to hide it. Why would she? They were both here to do this. No holds barred, no clothes, no nothing. Why bother to be coy? Why bother to pretend this was about anything other than satisfying lust. And if that was all it was, why should either of them bother to hide that lust.

“Keep looking at me like that, sweetheart, this is gonna end fast.”

“Don’t do that,” she said, a wicked smile on her lips. “You’re no good to me in that case.”

“Don’t worry, babe. I can get it up more than once.”

At least, he could if he remembered correctly.

“Good thing I brought about three boxes of condoms.”

“For two days? You did have high hopes for the weekend.”

“Ten years,” she reiterated.

“Point taken.”

He moved his hands down, slowly working at his belt. The way that she licked her lips as her eyes followed his every movement ratcheting up his arousal another impossible notch.

Everything felt too sharp, too clear, every rasp of fabric over his skin, every downward flick of her eyes, every small, near-imperceptible gasp on her lips.

He hadn’t been in a bedroom alone with a woman in a long damn time. And it was all catching up with him now.

Shutting down, being a mean bastard who didn’t let anyone close? That was easy enough. It made it easy to forget. He shut the world out, stripped everything away. Reverted back to the way he had been just after his parents had died and it had been too difficult to feel anything more than his grief.

That was what he had done in the past five years. That was what he had done with his new, impossible loss that never should have happened. Wouldn’t have if he’d had a shred of self-control and decency.

And now, tonight, he was proving that he probably still didn’t have any at all. Oh well, just as well. Because he was going to do this.

He was going to do her.

He pushed his jeans down his lean hips, showing her the extent of his desire for her, reveling in the way her eyes widened when he revealed his body completely to her hungry gaze.

“I have never seen one that big before,” she said.

He laughed. “Are you just saying that because it’s what you think men need to hear?”

“No, I’m saying that because it’s the biggest I’ve ever seen. And I want it.”

“Baby,” he said, “you can have it.”

Maddy turned over onto her stomach and crawled across the bed on all fours in a move that damn near gave him a heart attack. Then she moved to the edge of the mattress, straightening up, raking her nails down over his torso before she leaned in, flicking her tongue over the head of his arousal.

He jerked beneath her touch, his length twitching as her tongue traced it from base to tip, just before she engulfed him completely in the warm heat of her mouth. She hummed, the vibration moving through his body, drawing his balls up tight. He really was going to lose it. Here and now like a green teenage boy if he didn’t get a grip on himself. Or a grip on her.

He settled for the second option.

He reached back, grabbing hold of her hair and jerking her lips away from him. “You keep doing that and it really will end.”

The color was high in her cheeks, her eyes glittering. “I’ve never, ever enjoyed it like that before.”

She was so good for his ego. Way better than a man like him deserved. But damned if he wasn’t going to take it.

“Well, you can enjoy more of that. Later. Right now? I need to be inside you.”

“Technically,” she said, her tone one of protest, “you were inside me.”

“And as much as I like being in that pretty mouth of yours, that isn’t what I want right now.” He gritted his teeth, looking around the room. “The condoms.”

She scrambled off the bed and shimmied out of her jeans and panties as she made her way across the room and toward her suitcase. She flipped it open, dug through it frantically and produced the two packets he had seen earlier.

All things considered, he felt a little bit triumphant to be the one getting these condoms. He didn’t know Christopher, but that sad sack was sitting at home with a hard-on, and Sam was having his woman. He was going to go ahead and enjoy the hell out of that.

Madison turned to face him, the sight of that enticing, pale triangle at the apex of her thighs sending a shot straight down to his gut. She kept her eyes on his as she moved nearer, holding one of the condoms like it was a reward he was about to receive.

She tore it open and settled back onto the bed, then leaned forward and rolled it over his length. Then she took her position back up against the pillows, her thighs parting, her heavily lidded gaze averted from his now that she was in that vulnerable position.

“Okay,” she said, “I’m ready.”

She wasn’t. Not by a long shot.

Ten years.

And he had been ready to thrust into her with absolutely no finesse. A woman who’d been celibate for ten years deserved more than that. She deserved more than one orgasm. Hell, she deserved more than two.

He had never been the biggest fan of Madison West, but tonight they were allies. Allies in pleasure. And he was going to hold up his end of the bargain so well that if she was celibate after this, it really would be because she was waiting for her legs to work again.

“Not quite yet, Maddy,” he said, kneeling down at the end of the bed, reaching forward and grabbing hold of her hips, dragging her down toward his face. He brought her up against his mouth, her legs thrown over his shoulders, that place where she was warm and wet for him right there, ready for him to taste her.

“Sam!” Maddy squeaked.

“There is no way you’re a prude, Maddy,” he said. “I’ve had too many conversations with you to believe that.”

“I’ve never... No one has ever...”

“Then it’s time somebody did.”

He lowered his head, tasting her in long, slow passes, like she was an ice-cream cone that he just had to take the time to savor. Like she was a delicacy he couldn’t get enough of.

Because she was.

She was all warmth and sweet female, better than he had ever remembered a woman being. Or maybe she was just better. It was hard to say. He didn’t really care which. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was this.

If he could lose himself in any moment, in any time, it would be this one.

It sure as hell wouldn’t be pounding iron, trying to hammer the guilt out of his body. Certainly wouldn’t be in his damn sculptures, trying to figure out what to make next, trying to figure out how to satisfy the customer. This deeply personal thing that had started being given to the rest of the world, when he wasn’t sure he wanted the rest of the world to see what was inside him.

Hell, he didn’t want to see what was inside him.

He made a hell of a lot of money, carving himself out, making it into a product people could buy. And he sure as hell liked the money, but that didn’t make it a pleasant experience.

No, none of that mattered. Not now. Not when there was Maddy. And that sweet sugar-whiskey taste.

He tasted her until she screamed, and then he thrust his fingers inside her, fast and rough, until he felt her pulse around him, until her orgasm swept through them both.

Then he moved up, his lips almost touching hers. “Now,” he said, his voice husky, “now you’re ready.”

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