Principles And Pleasures

What made matters worse was that she had no idea who he was. He had deceived her.

He needed to tell Meredith who he was.

How had he lost control? Was it hearing that he had been her only lover?

The truth was, he had been attracted to Meredith from the moment he saw her at her party. He had hoped that time would have lessened his reaction to her. But it hadn’t.

It seemed to have made it worse.

She had opened up to him, trusting him to see her vulnerable. And he had encouraged it. In spite of himself, he wanted her to trust him. To care about him.

He was a fool. Because once Meredith found out who he was, she would want nothing more than to get away from him.

Dear Reader,

As expected, Silhouette Desire has loads of passionate, powerful and provocative love stories for you this month. Our DYNASTIES: THE DANFORTHS continuity is winding to a close with the penultimate title, Terms of Surrender, by Shirley Rogers. A long-lost Danforth heir may just have been found—and heavens, is this prominent family in for a big surprise! And talk about steamy secrets, Peggy Moreland is back with Sins of a Tanner, a stellar finale to her series THE TANNERS OF TEXAS.

If it’s scandalous behavior you’re looking for, look no farther than For Services Rendered by Anne Marie Winston. This MANTALK book—the series that offers stories strictly from the hero’s point of view—has a fabulous hero who does the heroine a very special favor. Hmmmm. And Alexandra Sellers is back in Desire with a fresh installment of her SONS OF THE DESERT series. Sheikh’s Castaway will give you plenty of sweet (and naughty) dreams.

Even more shocking situations pop up in Linda Conrad’s sensual Between Strangers. Imagine if you were stuck on the side of the road during a blizzard and a sexy cowboy offered you shelter from the storm…. (Hello, are you still with me?) Rounding out the month is Margaret Allison’s Principles and Pleasures, a daring romp between a workaholic heroine and a man she doesn’t know is actually her archenemy.

So settle in for some sensual, scandalous love stories…and enjoy every moment!

Melissa Jeglinski

Senior Editor, Silhouette Desire

Principles and Pleasures

Margaret Allison

MARGARET ALLISON

was raised in the suburbs of Detroit, Michigan, and received a B.A. in political science from the University of Michigan. A former marketing executive, she has also worked as a model and actress. She is the author of several novels and is happy to return to the world of romance after taking some time off to care for her young children. Margaret currently divides her time between her computer, the washing machine and the grocery store. She loves to hear from readers. Please write to her c/o Silhouette Books, 233 Broadway, Suite 1001, New York, NY 10279, or visit her Web site at margaretallison.com.

Contents

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

One

Until Meredith saw Josh Adams, she had been thinking that this year’s holiday party might just be her mother’s most successful ever. Elaborate ice sculptures decorated her family’s impressive foyer. Hundreds of votive candles were placed strategically, winding up staircases and layered across tables. Furniture had been moved to make room for the live spruce trees decorated with tiny gold lights and crystal icicles. And, as usual, all of Aspen high society had turned out to dance, sip champagne and eat caviar.

Meredith watched as he moved through the crowd, smiling and shaking hands. She had not seen Josh in more than ten years, but he had not aged a day. Curly brown hair, smoky-gray eyes and a sexy just-rolled-out-of-bed grin. It was as if he had never left for Europe, as if crashing the party of an ex-lover with whom he had not spoken in years was the most natural thing in the world.

Although, she reminded herself, ex-lover was a generous term for what they were to each other. It had been one night, nothing more.

But, oh, what a night.

Focus, she reminded herself. She could not afford to be distracted by childhood crushes.

Still, she couldn’t help but wonder what had brought him back after all this time. Josh had been a friend of her younger sister, Carly, and Carly had not mentioned him in years. The last Meredith had heard was that he had moved to Europe to continue his career as a ski instructor to the wealthy.

Ignore him, she told herself.

She weaved her way through the horde of people, doing her best to play the role of hostess. It was a difficult chore for someone who was so distracted, even more difficult for one who preferred spending her evenings behind her desk, reviewing the latest financials. As CEO of Cartwright Enterprises, once one of the largest conglomerates in the country, Meredith had a difficult job. The company had been hemorrhaging money, driven into financial ruin by her stepfather. An addicted gambler, he had embezzled millions of the company’s dollars before taking his own life. The stock had fallen drastically, taking their family fortune along with it.

As Meredith greeted a woman she barely knew with the standard cheek kiss, she found herself glancing over her shoulder, looking for Josh. Why was he here? As far as she knew, he had not been invited. She would have remembered if Josh’s name had been on the invitation list.

But then again, if Carly had decided to invite him at the last minute, she would not have bothered to mention it to Meredith. After all, why would she? Carly knew nothing about Meredith’s night with Josh. Meredith had never found the right moment to admit the truth: she had seduced the greatest womanizer Aspen had ever seen.

Carly, she knew, would have been shocked. As would all of Aspen. The Goody Two-shoes nerd falling for the playboy. No one had any idea of how Meredith had grown up longing for Josh, of how many parties Meredith had spent hiding at the top of the banister, watching Josh flirt with all of the girls.

She drained her glass of champagne. What was the matter with her? After all, she had not seen or spoken with him since the day they’d made love, all those years ago. Josh had left for Europe shortly after, where she assumed he still lived.

It was the party, Meredith realized. Her nervous brain had kicked into third gear, tossing up everything and anyone who had ever made her feel uncomfortable. She glanced at her watch. It was nearly eleven o’clock. She had to endure several more hours.

Never one to indulge in gaiety or frivolity for the sake of it, Meredith could not remember the last time she had been to an event that wasn’t business-related. Her whole life could be defined by one word: work. She had spent her college years with her nose to the grindstone and it had paid off. She had graduated magna cum laude from Harvard and had gone to work in her family’s Denver, Colorado-based company. She’d worked her way up and had been the obvious choice for CEO when her stepfather died. The shareholders had voted her in as president of Cartwright Enterprises at the age of twenty-nine. Since then she had worked long and hard to try to save their failing company from financial ruin.

Ironically, however, it was not Meredith who was saving their company but Carly.

Carly, although she had a title and office at Cartwright Enterprises, had never shown up for a day of work. But she had shown remarkable sense in love.

Meredith had long had her eye on a product called Durasnow, an artificial snow that stayed fresh in temperatures above freezing. Meredith had had little hope of acquiring the rights. After all, Durasnow was a product that could revolutionize the skiing industry. But Carly’s engagement had given her a leg up on the competition. Suddenly, Meredith had a family connection, and when she offered an all-stock deal, the Durans had seemed excited. Everything was finally moving on track.

“Meredith,” said her mother. “Have you seen Carly?” Viera Cartwright raised an eyebrow, indicating her displeasure.

“No. Why? What did she do?” Meredith asked. Although Carly was almost thirty, her mother still treated her as a child. There was something about Carly that made people want to take care of her. An almost delicate and vulnerable air that made one think she was incapable of taking care of herself.

“Her friend Josh is here.”

Meredith’s heart quickened.

“You remember him,” her mother said, misinterpreting Meredith’s silence. “Your old skiing instructor.”

“Yes,” Meredith replied as casually as she could. “I know. I saw him.”

“Well? Who invited him?” Viera asked unhappily.

“Does it matter?”

Her mother bit her lip. “Carly was just mentioning him the other day.”

“So? They were friends for a long time.”

Viera’s voice dropped to a stage whisper. “She was asking me if I ever had any regrets when I got married.”

“Regrets?” Meredith whispered back. “What did she mean by that?”

“She said the only regret she had was that she had never slept with Josh Adams.”

Meredith inhaled sharply. Her sister had a crush on Josh Adams? “She’s getting married in a couple of weeks!”

“You don’t think I know that? I just ordered five thousand dollars’ worth of white orchids.”

“But she loves Mark.”

“Of course she does. But she’s Carly. And Mark is out of town until Friday.”

Carly had always had her pick of the men in Aspen. She was known for her fickle heart, falling in and out of love as easily as some changed hairstyles. But it seemed that with Mark Duran, she had finally found the man of her dreams. The handsome, serious surgeon had won her heart and had Carly changing her ways. Or so Meredith had hoped.

“Where is she?” Meredith asked.

“I don’t know,” Viera replied. “And I don’t see Josh, either.”

“I wonder why he came back,” Meredith said, concerned. “He’s been living in Europe for years.”

“Yes. Quite a coincidence,” her mother said sarcastically.

“What do you mean?”

Viera sighed. “I just hope Carly hasn’t contacted him or done something foolish.”

Meredith gave up looking for Carly and began searching for her sister’s future in-laws, the guests of honor. If not for them and the impending purchase of Durasnow, the prudent Meredith would have called off her mother’s expensive holiday party. After all, they no longer had the funds to support such an extravagant lifestyle. But Meredith knew that a cancellation would stir rumors of financial hardship. And so, with the prospect of good fortune and wanting to squash any rumors of family turmoil, Meredith had allowed her mother to hire, buy and pay for the best of the best.

And now, it seemed, it was all a waste. All because of Josh Adams.

For once Meredith wished she’d told her sister the truth about what had happened that night on the mountain with Josh. Perhaps if Carly knew that Meredith and Josh had a history, Carly wouldn’t be lusting after him.

A waiter walked past carrying a trayful of filled champagne glasses. Meredith did a quick count. Twelve glasses at ten dollars a pop. One hundred and twenty dollars on the tray alone. And at that moment, there were at least twenty trays being passed around. Not to mention the trays of fresh shrimp, the lobster tails on the buffet…the elaborate French desserts. The thought of the amount of money involved was overwhelming. It was enough to make Meredith set her glass down and take another. She downed the champagne and turned back to her mother.

“Where are the Durans?” Meredith asked, referring to her sister’s future in-laws. Her mother glanced upward, toward the second-floor balcony. Meredith followed with her eyes. The Durans were standing by themselves. If the scowls on their faces were any indication, they were not enjoying the party.

“I’ll take care of them,” Meredith said, handing her mother her empty glass. “You look for Carly.”

Meredith pushed her way through the crowd. She grabbed hold of her long black satin gown and climbed the steps, two at a time. She wished she had worn what she’d wanted, instead of allowing her mother and sister to talk her into this ridiculous frock. She would’ve been much more comfortable in her black satin pants and shirt. “Wayne…Cassie,” Meredith said, approaching the Durans. “I was just talking to the Morrows about the quality of Durasnow—”

“Meredith,” Mr. Duran said, cutting her off. He pointed toward the dance floor. “Who the hell is that?”

Meredith turned. Carly stood under the ornamental lights in the corner of the room. And she was not alone.

Josh looked every bit as entranced by Carly as she was by him.

“Oh,” she said with a forced laugh. “That man? The one dancing with Carly? He’s our former ski instructor. We grew up with him. He’s practically like a brother to us.”

“I never danced with my sister that way,” Wayne said.

“Ha-ha,” Meredith laughed stiffly, trying to fight the panic building inside. “Josh lives in Europe.”

“Well, he’s certainly here now, isn’t he?” Wayne snapped.

“He certainly is,” Meredith said. “If you’ll excuse me, I absolutely must go say hello.”

How could Carly do to this to her? Do this to herself? If Mark heard about the way she was cavorting with a known womanizer…

She forced herself to take a breath. They were dancing. And that was all….

Carly leaned over and kissed Josh’s neck.

Meredith did a half jog the rest of the way. “Carly!” said Meredith, practically jumping in between them. “My goodness! Here you are. Your future-in-laws are looking for you.”

Meredith focused her attention solely on her sister. She did not acknowledge Josh. She could not look at him, for fear a mere look would give her away. Ignore him, she reminded herself.

“I’m busy,” Carly said. Her words were slurred just enough for Meredith to recognize that her sister had been enjoying the champagne. This was trouble. Plain and simple.

“Hello, Meredith.”

At the sound of Josh’s voice, Meredith felt a tickle at the base of her spine. She shook it off. She reminded herself she no longer felt anything for the man to whom she had lost her virginity. It was a childhood crush, that’s all. She was long over him.

“Hello, Josh,” Meredith managed to say, glancing at him as casually as she could. Suddenly she felt like giggling for no reason whatsoever except that Josh Adams was standing beside her. She was back in high school. She was the nerd talking to the most popular boy in town.

Meredith glanced toward the balcony. The Durans were watching them. Cassie Duran leaned over and whispered in her husband’s ear while shaking her head in disapproval. Meredith snapped out of her reverie.

“Carly,” she said. “I need to speak with you.”

“I’m busy,” Carly said.

“I’m afraid I have to insist,” Meredith said, taking her sister’s arm. She attempted to give Josh a casual smile. “Nice to see you again, Josh.”

“Meet me in the gazebo in ten minutes,” Carly said to Josh. She turned back toward Meredith and yanked her arm away. “What is so important that it couldn’t wait?”

Meredith said, “Upstairs.”

Viera met them at the landing and whisked them into the second-floor library.

Viera slammed the door behind them. “What are you doing?” Viera asked Carly. Her voice was shrill and accusatory. “The other day when you were talking about Josh, I didn’t honestly think you were serious. I didn’t think you would contact him and arrange to meet him while your fiancé was out of town.”

“Calm down, Mother. I wasn’t.”

“What do you mean?” Meredith asked.

“I mean, Josh just showed up. Out of the blue. Isn’t that weird?” Carly leaned back in the chair, smiling contentedly.

“Have you been drinking?” Meredith asked, knowing her sister rarely drank.

“A little champagne,” Carly said, pinching her fingers together.

“Carly,” said her mother. “Think of Mark. What’s he going to say when his parents tell him about you cavorting with another man?”

“It’s not just any man. It’s Josh.” She focused her innocent eyes on Meredith. “Meredith, tell her. Tell her how special Josh is.”

“Me?” Meredith swallowed. “What makes you think I…well…”

“It doesn’t make any difference anyway,” Carly said, sounding like a spoiled child. “It’s nobody’s business but mine.”

“That’s where you’re wrong,” Viera said calmly. “If you don’t marry Mark…”

“We’ll lose the precious Durasnow contract,” Carly said. “Well, I am marrying him. But I have one more wild oat to sow first.”

“Carly!” Viera gasped.

Meredith and her mother exchanged a glance. Meredith held her breath. This was terrible. Awful. Her sister was going to fool around with Josh? The man to whom she had lost her virginity? The only man she had ever slept with?

She needed to admit the truth to her sister right now. To confess her history with Josh. It’s just that…well, what did it matter anyway? It was a long time ago. One night. She doubted Josh even remembered.

“It’s none of your business if I—” Carly stood. “If I—” She held her hand to her mouth and swallowed.

“Carly?” Meredith asked. “Are you all right?”

“I—excuse me…” With one hand over her mouth and one on her stomach, Carly ran into the bathroom.

“This is terrible,” Viera said. “Her whole future. Ruined. It’s the curse. The curse of the Cartwright women.”

Meredith knew what her mother was referring to. The Cartwright women were known for their poor choices in husbands. Meredith and Carly often joked about the infamous men in their family. Their great-grandfather had died in the arms of another woman, as had their grandfather. Viera’s first husband, Meredith’s father, was also a notorious playboy. He died of a heart attack just like his father and grandfather, while making love to a woman who was not his wife. Viera’s second husband, Carly’s father, was not a playboy but a thief. After bilking millions of dollars out of his wife’s company, he killed himself shortly after the board discovered his crime.

“She loves Mark. She’ll marry him,” Meredith said. She could not bear the thought of her sister losing Mark. Carly had chosen a man unlike her father or her grandfather. Mark Duran was sweet, earnest and madly in love with her.

“Careful,” her mother said, “you sound like a romantic. Practical Meredith…at least I’ll never have to worry about you.”

“Why not?” Meredith said.

“Because you’re not like your sister, giving your heart away to this man or that man.”

“You’re saying you don’t have to worry about me because I don’t have a boyfriend?”

“You’ve never had a boyfriend. Not that there’s anything wrong with that,” her mother said. “You just prefer to be alone than date some of the eligible bachelors that have expressed interest.”

“What eligible bachelors?” Meredith asked. It was true that she had never had a boyfriend, but she wasn’t avoiding men. She dated…occasionally.

“Frank…for one,” she said, mentioning a local dentist with whom Meredith had shared several dinners.

“I’m not interested in him. No chemistry.”

“See?”

“I don’t want to go out with just anyone. After all, I’m busy. I have a lot of responsibility.”

“Of course, dear.” But Meredith could tell from her mother’s voice she did not understand.

“I’m one of the only women running a conglomerate,” Meredith continued.

“Of course, dear,” her mother repeated.

“And it’s not as if I turn men down,” she said. “I can’t remember when I was asked out last.”

“You’re smart, Meredith,” her mother said. “Most women your age are rushing around, caring for their husbands, their children. You just have to worry about yourself.”

“Right,” Meredith said, rather uncertainly.

“Especially now, during the holiday season,” Viera continued. “Most women your age are busy with parties and presents. But you don’t have to bother yourself with any of that. I’m sure this Christmas you’ll be at your office, dealing with business as usual.”

Carly opened the bathroom door. She made her way over to the couch and lay down. “I’m sick,” she said.

“Too much champagne and men,” her mother said.

“Speaking of which—” Carly touched a hand to her forehead “—Josh is waiting for me.” She turned toward Meredith and said, “He’s in the gazebo. Tell him that I couldn’t make it, but I’ll see him tomorrow.”

“Me?” Meredith asked. She did not want to see Josh alone. What if he mentioned their night together? It was too awkward. “Maybe you should go,” Meredith said to her mother.

“Absolutely not,” Viera said. “I’m going to find the Durans and try to smooth things over. Besides, I really don’t care if he stands there all night. Let him freeze his—”

“Mother!” Carly said. “Please, stop talking. My head is spinning.” She grabbed Meredith’s hand and held it. “You’ll go?”

Meredith looked at her sister. She always had a terrible time refusing her anything. “Okay,” she said. Taking a breath for confidence, Meredith headed toward the door. Out of the corner of her eye, she could’ve sworn she saw her sister mouth something to her mother. But when she turned back, Viera was frowning and Carly had her eyes closed.

“Go on,” her mother said. “And hurry back.”

Meredith walked out of the room. She tried to swallow the sadness welling in her throat. It had pained her to hear her mother sum up her life like that. But she knew Viera was not trying to be cruel. After all, it was the truth. Meredith had no social life. And it was looking as though she never would. Whereas Carly always had too many men to choose from, Meredith never had any.

But her mother was wrong to assume she liked her situation. She had not planned on being the girl never asked to dance. During college, she had tried to change. Tried to be more like Carly. And that was how she’d ended up with Josh.

Meredith blushed as she remembered how it had all come about. She had harbored a secret crush on Josh all through high school. Several years older than her, he was a gifted ski instructor. He dated socialites, girls like her sister, beautiful and charming. Meredith, in contrast, was tall and awkward, with brown hair, brown eyes and glasses. She was the type of girl that boys would choose as a study partner, not a dinner date.

Meredith had left Colorado for college on the East coast, hoping to forget about Josh. But her social life had not improved. Among her friends she was known as the “virgin.” All they ever talked about was men and sex. “It’s like plunging into freezing cold water,” one of them said. “It’s a little weird at first, but then you get used to it.”

“Just do it,” another advised her. “Don’t be so picky. Men are going to start thinking there’s something wrong with you.”

But Meredith wanted her first time to be perfect. She wanted her first lover to be kind and considerate. Skilled and confident.

Finally, as she’d entered her senior year of college, Meredith had become tired of waiting. If she was ever going to lose her virginity, she was going to have to take action herself. But there was only one man with whom she wanted to make love.