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“No. I’m suggesting that you go ahead with the wedding.”
“What in the world are you talking about? I can’t have a wedding without a groom.”
“I know. So I’m volunteering.”
She straightened away from him, pushing herself up until she was standing, looking down at him. With a disbelieving shake to her head, she said, “You can’t be serious!”
Chris took his time getting up. When they were facing each other once again, he met her bewildered gaze with a level one of his own. He let her see what was in his eyes, what he was feeling, before he replied, “I’m very serious, Maribeth.”
If she lived to be a hundred, Maribeth knew that she would never experience a day like this one. “Why?” Blurted out that way, her response had sounded almost insulting.
“I have many reasons, none of which matter in the least if you find the idea repulsive.”
Marriage to Chris Cochran repulsive? Many feelings came to mind, but repulsion wasn’t one of them. For a day filled with shocking disclosures, this one was as great as any she’d heard so far.
Marriage with Chris? Why, she’d never thought of him in that way. At least…not exactly. Even though she had teased him earlier today about the women in his life, he’d always seemed too much of a loner for her to ever imagine him married to anyone.
He made her nervous in a way she couldn’t quite describe. What would it be like to be married to him? To live with him? To sleep with him? To make loveWell! He’d certainly taken her mind off the news he’d brought. She’d gotten so caught up in his proposal—and that was exactly what it was, she realized with a dazed fascination—that she had momentarily forgotten that the entire county was going to turn out for her wedding in three days, unless she got busy and explained to everyone what had happened.
Chris wished he knew what she was thinking. Her expressive face revealed a bewildering series of thoughts and feelings, none of which he’d been able to decipher.
“This doesn’t sound at all like you, Chris,” she finally said. “You’re not the impulsive type. So why would you suggest something so unusual?”
He took her hand, placed it on his palm and traced the length of her fingers with his other hand. “What’s so unusual about it? Think about it for a moment. You’ve been planning to get married for sometime now. You can still get married. You’ve known me for almost as long as you’ve known Bobby, so it’s not as if we’re strangers. You pointed out earlier that you had spent most of your life on the ranch. Well, now you can come with me and see something more of the world.”
“I can’t take advantage of you,” she said slowly, her gaze fixed on their linked hands.
Chris couldn’t help but be amused. She sounded so earnest. And so scared. “Sure you can. You have my permission to take advantage of me at anytime, starting right now.” He released her hands and tipped her chin up so that she could see his face. He’d never been more sincere in his life when he said, “I can’t think of anything that would give me more pleasure than to marry you, Maribeth.”
Her expression was difficult to make out. It was only then that he realized the light was fading rapidly from the sky.
“Oh, Chris,” she said in the gathering darkness. He could hear the tears in her voice. She wiped her hand impatiently across her eyes once again. “I don’t know what to say.”
A surge of exultation shot through him. She hadn’t turned him down cold. Was it fair to take advantage of her while she was so vulnerable’?
Something needed to be done. And done quickly.
Giving in to temptation, Chris slid his arm around her waist and with his other hand, tilted her chin upward. Moving slowly in order to give her time to stop him if she wished, he leaned closer until his lips brushed hers.
She didn’t flinch and she didn’t pull away. That was enough encouragement for him to put all the yearning he felt into the kiss that he’d fantasized giving her for more years than he could remember.
Her lips were even softer than he had imagined. She tasted of tears and temptation. He took his time molding his mouth to fit hers, easing his way as her innocence imprinted itself on him.
He pressed her against him, his hands exploring her back from her nape to the base of her spine while he nudged her lips apart and dipped into the sweetness of her mouth.
By the time Maribeth understood that Chris intended to kiss her, he was already doing it. The first touch of his mouth froze her into immobility. This was Chris Cochran kissing her! She would have known it was him even if she’d been wearing a blindfold because of the tingling sensation she’d experienced as soon as he touched her. Her body must be some kind of tuning fork where he was concerned!
That was her last coherent thought. Maribeth had thought that she was experienced in the art of kissing at least, but she’d never experienced anything like this before. All she could do was wrap her arms around his waist and hold on.
By the time he drew away from her with obvious reluctance some untold time later, she was having trouble getting her breath. He seemed to be having a similar problem. He leaned his forehead against hers.
“So what do you say?” he whispered. “Shall we shock everybody and do it?”
She was already in shock, and all she’d done was kiss Chris Cochran. Perhaps it would be better to say that Chris had kissed her.
Her head was still swimming.
In a few short hours everything she thought she knew and understood about herself and her life had been turned upside down. She’d been grieving over Bobby one minute and wholeheartedly participating in a kiss with Chris the next.
Had the whole world gone mad, or was it just her?
“Oh, Chris. I can’t make a decision like that right now. I can’t even think right now.”
He couldn’t see her face, but he could hear the pain and confusion in her voice. He wasn’t certain what to say. He knew better than to kiss her again. That way led to madness if he couldn’t place her on the blanket nearby and make passionate love to her.
“I need to get back home,” she said, only now stepping away from him. “Everybody will be wondering why I’ve been gone so long.”
“You’re twenty-six years old, Maribeth, not sixteen. Believe it or not, you don’t have to account for every moment of your life anymore.”
“You’re right, of course. I guess it’s a habit.”
“I sometimes wonder if you don’t feel as though you’re in some kind of suspended time frame, like Sleeping Beauty, waiting for your prince to come claim you. You’ve been content to stay here with your family working on the ranch while you waited for Bobby to return home.”
“Perhaps. I don’t know. I’ve stayed here because this has been my life. I never envisioned another kind. There was no reason to, until now. I never would have guessed that Bobby would do something like this. I knew he wasn’t in any hurry to come home, which is why I didn’t push him to set a date for the wedding. After four years on the road, I thought he was getting ready to settle down. How could I have known… ?” Her voice trailed off, leaving her feeling so empty. The life she thought she’d had was no longer there. What could she do to create an alternate future? The thought was scary, no matter what she chose.
“Come with me, Maribeth. Give me the opportunity to show you what’s out there on the horizon. Will you do that for me… and for yourself?”
“I don’t know, Chris. Everything is happening at once. This must be how a person would feel when they’re enjoying the scenic countryside and then suddenly step on a land mine. My world’s just exploded into little pieces.”
He kissed her again, a gentle, soothing touch that still set all her senses on red alert.
“Give me the chance to help put your life back together, will you?” he murmured. “I don’t want to leave here with you feeling so shattered.”
“And how do I explain the switch to people?”
“It’s too late to say much, isn’t it? If you agree to marry me, you don’t really need to make any explanations. Everyone will come to see you get married as planned. You’ll still be getting married. Only the groom will be different.”
“You don’t think they’ll notice?” she asked, almost laughing at the idea. “Chris, this isn’t some kind of play where suddenly the understudy has to fill in.”
“Maybe not, but it would certainly give the people in the county something to talk about for years to come.”
“Oh, Chris, how could I have forgotten your crazy sense of humor?”
“If you’ll marry me, you’ll be able to stay in closer touch to be reminded.”
“I must be out of my mind. I’m actually considering the idea.”
That was as much as he could hope for. He didn’t want to push his luck. “Why don’t I take you home? You’re exhausted and still in shock. I’ll spend the night at my family’s place and we’ll talk tomorrow. See how you feel about things then. A good night’s sleep will do wonders for you.”
“I’m not sure I could sleep. I don’t know how I could get my mind to slow down. It seems to be running off in all directions.”
He gathered up the blanket and led her back to the car. Once inside, he took her hand. “I just want you to remember that you don’t have to deal with this on your own. I’m here for you. I want to help. You know that I’ll accept whatever you decide, but I want you to consider my offer. Will you do that for me?”
Her face was a pale blur in the dark. He couldn’t read her expression. “I can’t believe you’d be willing to make such a sacrifice.”
“Sacrifice?”
“Marrying me.”
His laugh was self-mocking even though she wasn’t aware of it. “Someday I hope to convince you that marrying you is definitely not my idea of a sacrifice.”
He started the car and backed around, taking the road back to the highway. He was encouraged by the fact that she had left her hand in his. It remained there all the way back to the ranch.
“Well, there you are,” Megan said when Maribeth walked into the house. “I was wondering if we needed to send out a search party for you.”
Maribeth kept her head down, hoping Megan wouldn’t notice her face. She still clutched Chris’s handkerchief in her hand.
“We just got to talking,” she replied, her voice sounding hoarse in her ears, “and didn’t notice the time.”
They were in the kitchen and Maribeth opened the refrigerator as though looking for something to eat.
“Well, it’s a good thing Bobby’s not the jealous type. Otherwise he might have something to say about his fiancée disappearing for hours with his best friend.” When Maribeth continued to stare sightlessly into the refrigerator, Megan added, “I saved you a plate. It’s on the bottom shelf.”
“Thanks.” Maribeth’s reply was muffled.
“Are you getting a cold? You sound funny.” Megan took the plate out of Maribeth’s hands and looked at her. “And your face is all blotchy. Have you been crying?”
“For Pete’s sake, Megan. I’m twenty-six years old. I don’t need you mothering me any longer. Would you give it a rest?”
Megan blinked in surprise. Maribeth knew she was acting out of character, but she wasn’t ready to discuss the news she’d received with anyone at the moment. For that matter, she couldn’t imagine a time when she’d be ready to tell the family that Bobby Metcalf had cared so little for her that he had blithely run off and married somebody else days before their wedding.
She watched Megan put the plate of food in the microwave and set the timer. The silence in the kitchen became oppressive to her.
“I’m sorry I snapped at you,” Maribeth finally said, sitting down at the table and gently rubbing her swollen eyelids. “My eyes have been watering. I guess I could be getting a cold.”
Megan poured a glass of iced tea and set it down in front of her. “At the risk of sounding too motherly once again, I’d suggest that you take a hot bath after dinner and get to bed early. You certainly don’t want to be coughing and sneezing on Saturday.”
The microwave pinged and Maribeth jumped up to get there first. “Good idea. I think I’ll do that,” she muttered, carrying her plate and silverware to the table.
“Do you want me to stay with you while you eat?”
Maribeth knew that her sister was just trying to be polite. Normally Maribeth would have enjoyed her company. But not now. Now, all she wanted was to be left alone.
“That’s okay, sis. But thanks for the offer.” She kept her eyes on her food.
Once Megan left the kitchen Maribeth tried her best to eat. She knew she couldn’t choke down much of it, but Megan’s attitude was just a small sample of what she could expect, magnified a few dozen times, if she told her family what had happened. She could almost visualize what would happen. Megan would immediately get on the phone to Mollie. Then her sisters would tell their husbands. She wouldn’t put it past Travis and Deke to round up a posse of angry friends and neighbors and go after Bobby with the intention of lynching him.
Even the children would get into the act in their own way—trying to comfort her with pats and special little gifts.
How could she possibly deal with all of that? Chris was right. She needed to get away from here. Maybe she would leave for a while. She could go anywhere. She’d been faithfully saving the money Travis paid her, knowing she’d need money once she and Bobby were married. She could take the money and go to Houston, or maybe San Antonio… or Dallas.
Of course, she could go to Dallas without actually living with Chris. At least he would be there close by. She could find an apartment, maybe find a job somewhere. She could—
Just who was she fooling? She’d never been on her own in her life! She’d always had friends and family around her, looking after her, caring for her, babying her.
The truth was that she’d been spoiled by everyone. She barely remembered her parents. What stood out in her memory from that awful time was how upset Megan and Mollie had been. It was only later that she understood that the three of them could have been split up and put into foster homes.
None of those memories seemed real to her now. She’d grown up with Mollie taking care of the house and meals and Megan working the ranch.
What, exactly, had she contributed to the group?
A big fat zero.
She’d blithely played with her friends, tagged along behind Bobby and Chris, worked with her 4-H projects and planned her future around Bobby Metcalf.
It was almost as if Bobby’s actions had forced her to stop and take a cold, hard look at herself.
She didn’t like what she saw.
By the time Megan and Mollie had reached her age, they were wives and mothers, running households, being responsible.
She was still playing with her animals and getting paid for it.
Maribeth looked down at her plate and realized that she’d eaten every bite of food on it. So much for all the agonized suffering she was doing. It certainly hadn’t affected her appetite.
What she was doing was sitting there feeling sorry for herself, feeling picked on because she had a sister who was concerned about her, knowing how the family would rally around her if she told them the truth.
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