Re-Awakening His Shy Nurse

It doesn’t seem ten minutes since I first sat down to write one of these letters for my first book, and now I’m on number five it’s becoming a regular pleasure.

It’s often said that true courage is doing something despite your fear. If that’s so then we are all heroes and heroines, because everyone’s done something which has frightened them. And sometimes fear can be a good thing. It warns us of danger, helps to keep us safe. But when fear ceases to be a reaction to present danger and becomes a way of living it’s exhausting and overwhelming.

Katya has lived through a terrible experience, and although her physical wounds have healed she has every reason to feel fearful still. Meeting gentle, handsome Luke might be one of the best things she’s ever done, but it turns out to be one of the most difficult as well, when she is forced to confront her fears head-on.

Some of my own fears are in this book—both rational and irrational—and if writing about them was at times demanding, it was also a voyage of discovery for me.

I hope you enjoy Luke and Katya’s story. I’m always delighted to hear from readers and you can e-mail me via my website at: www.annieclaydon.com

Annie

Re-awakening His Shy Nurse

Annie Claydon

www.millsandboon.co.uk

DEDICATION

To all the staff and carers at the Sir Thomas Lipton Memorial Home, who prove daily that no kindness is too great to attempt or too small to bother with.

Table of Contents

Cover

Title Page

Dedication

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Epilogue

Copyright

CHAPTER ONE

SOMETIMES IT WAS the little things that mattered. A decent cup of coffee to start the day. A woman’s smile.

The days when Luke Kennedy opened his eyes to coffee and a smile were long gone and he’d got to the point where he hardly missed them. As he swung the door to the coffee shop open, he revised that sentiment slightly. He didn’t miss his ex-wife any more. But there was something about the smile of the latest recruit to the ranks of early-morning coffee-makers that made him regret his resolve to do without those moments of simple pleasure until he was up and dressed and had driven to the high street.

‘Hey, there.’ Her head popped up from beneath the counter. ‘Usual?’

‘Thanks. Two shots.’

‘I know.’ She gave him a lopsided grin that told him he would be mistaken if he chose to underestimate her. ‘You’re early this morning, I’ve only just opened up.’

Luke shrugged. It would be way too much information to tell her that it was the thought of her iridescent green eyes that had jolted him into wakefulness this morning. ‘Yeah.’

‘Right.’ The little quirk of her lips was far too knowing. As if she somehow understood that he’d made a decision not to get too close, and she didn’t blame him. Or maybe he was just looking for meanings where there were none.

She set the coffee to brew and poured the milk, twisting the controller for the steam nozzle. The significance of the slight popping sound that came from the coffee machine registered too late, and by the time it did, her startled yelp had already jolted Luke out of his reverie and into action.

‘Hey.’ He rounded the end of the counter and she stumbled another couple of steps backwards, obviously panicking. ‘Are you hurt?’

She was nursing one hand against her chest, still backing away from the steam that was issuing from the coffee machine. Luke turned, twisting the knob and shutting it off. ‘Did you burn yourself?’

She jumped as her back hit the far end of the counter, but it seemed to bring her to her senses. ‘I’m okay. I’m fine. Thanks.’

‘No, you’re not. Let me see.’ He took a step forward, holding out his hand, and she seemed to flinch even further back, like a frightened animal caught in a trap.

The look in her eyes wasn’t shock or pain. It was him that she was backing away from. Luke froze, instinctively spreading his hands, palms forward, in a sign that he would do her no harm. ‘Why don’t you put your hand into some cold water?’ He reached slowly for the small sink behind the counter and turned the tap on.

She hesitated. ‘Yes. Yes, I will. Thanks.’ It was obvious that she wasn’t going to come out of her corner yet and he had two choices. March over there, take hold of her and pull her over to the sink, if necessary, was the quickest, but something told him that if he tried that she’d only start to panic even more. Luke went for the second option and gave her some space.

By the time he’d made it back to the other side of the counter, she had her hand in the sink. And she was blushing. ‘I’m sorry. I overreacted.’

Luke could let that go. Right now, with the flush spreading from her cheeks to the nape of her neck, he could let just about anything go. ‘Are you all right? I didn’t mean to scare you.’

‘You didn’t.’ The answer was too defensive to be anything other than an excuse. ‘I … I just got a bit of a shock. Someone must have forgotten to clean the steam nozzle properly last night and when I switched it on …’ She tailed off. The tips of her ears were bright pink now and she was clutching at straws, trying to pretend that she hadn’t panicked and tried to run when he’d only tried to help her.

‘Made me jump, too.’ Not entirely true, but he got a nervous smile in return. ‘How’s your hand now?’

He expected her to evade the enquiry, but instead she withdrew her hand from the water, squinted at it and then plunged it back into the sink. ‘It looks fine. A little red, but it doesn’t feel too bad.’

She couldn’t have piqued his curiosity more if she’d tried. That sudden, perplexing reaction, followed by what seemed like a decision of sorts to trust him. ‘Best to keep it in the water a little while longer.’ She seemed far more comfortable now that the counter was separating them, and Luke planted his hands down on it, in a sign that he didn’t intend to again invade what she so obviously considered was her territory.

She nodded, abstractedly. She clearly had something on her mind, but it was impossible to tell what. Perhaps doing something practical would reassure her. ‘Have you got a first-aid kit behind there?’

‘Yes. It’s here.’ She reached under the sink with her free hand and pulled out a large plastic box, stretching across to slide it onto the counter.

Luke reached for the box and snapped it open. ‘I may not be qualified to treat humans, but I can do some basic first aid.’

‘Who are you qualified to treat?’ She was looking at him gravely.

‘Animals. I’m a vet.’

She nodded. ‘Well, I’ve seen enough burns to know that this one’s superficial. It’ll be sore for twenty-four hours and then it’ll be fine.’

‘Good. Now we’ve got that out of the way, perhaps you’ll let me dress it for you. It won’t take a moment to put a bandage on it.’ Luke couldn’t usually reason with his patients and it was refreshing to do so now. More complicated as well. Animals didn’t smell so good.

There was a moment of awkward silence and then the tension between them snapped. The quiet sound of her laugh was like fresh water poured over his burnt-out nerve-endings and sparking them back into life. ‘I suppose I’d be better off if I had four legs and not two.’

‘Much better. Or no legs. I’m good with snakes as well.’ He gave her what he hoped was a reassuring smile.

‘So how do you bandage a snake, then?’ She lifted her hand out of the water, dabbing it dry with a napkin as she walked slowly over to the counter.

‘Carefully. But that’s a very old joke.’

She laughed again, her eyes dancing, and then held her hand out towards him. Gently he touched the tips of her fingers and felt them tremble. Turning her hand to ascertain the extent of the damage, he applied his knowledge of first aid for humans and decided that he concurred with her assessment. It was a very minor burn.

Luke withdrew a small bandage from the first-aid kit. ‘You’ll not be wanting an Elizabethan collar?’

‘Think I can resist the temptation to gnaw at it.’ Even though she seemed more at ease with him now, she was still watching him carefully and Luke concentrated hard on winding the bandage with absolute precision around her hand. Tried to forget her eyes and the pallor of her skin against her auburn hair. The fragility of her almost-too-slender wrist.

‘That should do it.’ He fastened the bandage carefully, and she held her hand in front of her face, inspecting his handiwork.

‘Very neat.’ She was teasing him now, and Luke’s stomach tightened. Everything she did and said just seemed to stoke the growing fascination he felt. ‘So where do you usually do your bandaging?’

It was an innocent enough question, but Luke was under no illusions. This was a breakthrough of mammoth proportions. Up till now she’d shied away from anything that was even remotely personal, and he’d done so, too. But her mesmerising eyes broke his resolve.

‘I have my own practice. I’m also involved with the new nature reserve a couple of miles out of the village on the road towards Knighton. Along with a few other projects.’

‘So you’re a busy man, then.’

Luke nodded. He’d kept himself busy since Tanya had left. Found the contentment in his work that the sudden end of his marriage had stripped him of, filling his time so that there was no temptation to look elsewhere. ‘I stay occupied.’

‘Better get you your coffee, then. I don’t want to stop the wheels of industry from turning.’ She turned away from him, concentrating hard on the coffee machine, and Luke saw the side of her face flush slightly. ‘You won’t … tell anyone, will you? This is the first time I’ve opened up on my own.’

Women and their secrets. But this one seemed innocuous enough. ‘What’s to tell? Why don’t you sit down and I’ll make the coffee?’ He supposed that would have to be their secret, too, and the idea made him smile. ‘You … er … might be in shock or something.’

She dismissed the thought with a laugh. ‘I don’t think so.’ She pushed a large cardboard beaker in his direction. ‘But thanks for helping. This one’s on the house.’

It was almost a week before Luke heard another word from her. On the mornings that she was there in the coffee shop, she somehow contrived to be busy, leaving someone else to serve him. The more she ignored him, the more it intrigued him and finally, in the face of Luke’s determined patience, she broke.

‘Don’t you have a loyalty card?’

It was something. Luke was used to gaining trust by inches, and this sudden leap forward made an indifferent Thursday morning take on a sparkling, gem-like quality. ‘About twenty of them, in the glove compartment of my car. Each of them with one stamp.’

She twisted her lips in what might be construed as a grin. ‘That’s okay, you only need seven stamps for a coffee. Nothing in the rules that says they all have to be on the same card.’

Luke planted his elbows on the counter, leaning towards her slightly, and she didn’t draw back. ‘Okay, I’ll—’

‘No, no, no!’ Olenka, the manager of the coffee shop, had been checking stock behind the counter and it was she who leaned towards Luke, her chin jutting belligerently. ‘No kitten, no free coffee.’

The spark of excitement that was making Luke’s heart beat a little faster fizzled out, and the grimace he shot Olenka wasn’t all for show. ‘That’s blackmail, Olenka.’

‘Well spotted. Katya will not give you free coffee until my child has a kitten.’

Katya. She didn’t wear a name badge like the others, and Luke had been trying to fit different names to her smile. This one was perfect and it rolled around Luke’s brain, leaving happiness in its wake. Katya.

‘Do you hear me?’ Olenka was waving a finger at him.

‘I hear you. And it’s still next week, free coffee or not. You can’t rush nature.’

Olenka gave a laughing gesture of resignation, slipping into her mother tongue to express her feelings as she turned to Katya.

‘Tak.’ Katya gave Luke a small shrug. ‘Sounds as if you get to pay this week.’

‘That’s fine.’ Luke grinned at Olenka. ‘I’ll collect next week.’

Katya made his coffee, just the way he liked it, and handed it over, stamping a new loyalty card and stowing it under the counter. ‘I’ll keep this here, so you can’t forget it next time.’

‘Thanks.’ Time for just one more question before he had to pick up his coffee and go. ‘So you speak Polish?’

She nodded. ‘My father’s …’ She stopped herself. Even that small detail was clearly more information than she was comfortable about giving.

‘Right. My father’s a Scot.’ He grinned at her, picked up his coffee and turned before she had a chance to reply. If life had taught him one thing, it had made it very clear to Luke that the best time to leave was when you were winning.

Katya watched him go. He was broad, strong looking, but that didn’t necessarily count against him. The man who had ruined her career and put her in her own hospital, as a patient rather than a nurse, hadn’t been all that imposing. It was the eyes that mattered and there was kindness in this man’s dark eyes.

‘Luke.’ Katya too was being watched, and Olenka unglued herself from the doorway to the stockroom, letting it drift closed behind her.

‘So Peter’s getting a kitten, eh?’ The best thing to do was to ignore Olenka. The man was easy on the eye but his name was immaterial. All she needed to know about him was that he liked his latte with two shots.

‘Yes, he’s wanted one for a long time. He’s old enough to look after it properly.’ Olenka had switched back into Polish. Although Katya was a Londoner, whereas her cousin Olenka had been born and brought up in Poland, they shared a love of the language. It reminded Katya of her father, and Olenka of home.

‘It’ll do him good to have something to look after. What kind of kitten?’

Olenka shrugged. ‘Lucasz says they’re a bit of everything. There are seven kittens and they’re all different, so I’m going to take Piotr to go and choose one.’ She quirked her lips downwards. ‘Next week. Lucasz can’t rush nature and neither can I.’

‘Thought you said his name was Luke.’ Katya slipped back into English to make her point.

‘I like him. It is a compliment.’ Olenka narrowed her eyes. ‘You like him?’

‘He seems nice enough. I don’t really know him.’

Olenka dismissed her with a gesture. ‘It only takes one look to find out if you like a man.’

Katya had thought the same once upon a time. ‘I don’t do first impressions, Ola. My judgement isn’t that good.’

Olenka shook her head. ‘You made one mistake …’

‘One’s enough.’ Katya hadn’t suspected for a moment that everything had been about to blow up in her face so badly when she’d tried to help a patient. You didn’t get to make mistakes like that and still keep your faith in your own judgement.

Olenka groaned in frustration. Just the way Katya would have done before it had all happened, but now she knew differently. ‘You can look. You don’t need to touch.’

That was the trouble really. Katya was beginning to feel that she did need to touch. ‘He’s not that good-looking.’

‘Pftt. Are you blind?’ Olenka gave Katya’s comment exactly the consideration it deserved.

A clatter at the doorway came to her rescue and Katya turned, smiling at the man who was hurrying towards the counter. The first of the eight-thirty coffee rush. No time now to think about Luke’s dark, slightly dishevelled curls or his kind eyes. Or wonder whether those broad shoulders really were enough to keep someone safe. In all likelihood they were. Just not this someone.

CHAPTER TWO

PETER WAS SITTING obediently at the corner table of the coffee shop, one of his mother’s special hot chocolate drinks and a computer game in front of him. Katya took her eyes off him long enough to serve two women who couldn’t decide which drink was lowest in calories, and when she flipped her gaze back across the counter, Luke was sitting opposite him.

‘Peter … Peter …’ Peter was rummaging in his backpack and ignored her completely, but Luke looked up. Fair enough. This was a coffee shop and she worked here. There was no reason why she shouldn’t ask Luke herself. ‘Would you like something to drink?’

‘The hot chocolate looks nice.’ He got to his feet.

‘That’s okay. Stay there, I’ll bring it across.’ Katya made his drink carefully, creamy and rich with shaved chocolate sprinkled on top. When she set it in front of him he smiled appreciatively.

‘Thanks. What’s the damage?’

‘It’s on the house.’ Katya allowed herself a smile in his general direction. ‘I hear that the kittens are at home for visitors today.’

‘Yeah. Peter tells me he’s going to photograph them—’ He broke off as Peter passed his new camera across the table, and Luke turned it over in his hands to inspect it carefully. ‘Nice one, Peter. You’ll be able to take some great pictures with that.’

‘Aunt Katya bought it for my birthday,’ Peter piped up before Katya could stop him. ‘She’s not really my aunt, though.’

‘No?’ Luke gave the boy a conspiratorial smile.

‘No. She’s not my mother’s sister, she’s my mother’s cousin.’ Peter was counting on his fingers, the way he always did when he was trying to get a difficult detail exactly right. ‘But I call her Aunt.’

‘Fair enough.’ Luke nodded, clearly fighting to keep his face straight.

‘She’s going to help me look after the kitten.’ Peter was on a roll now, information leaking out of every new sentence. ‘Aunt Katya’s come to stay with us for a while.’

Luke already knew her name and now he knew where she lived and who her family were. It wasn’t Peter’s fault and Katya stopped herself from chiding him for it. She didn’t want to teach the boy to be fearful.

She reserved the right to be cautious herself, though. Katya turned, more quickly perhaps than she should, and bolted back behind the counter. Back to her own space, where she was just an anonymous face, who smiled, brewed coffee and took the customers’ money. She could feel Luke’s eyes on her and she ignored him. Olenka would be finished in the office soon, and Peter would not allow Luke and his mother to stay here a moment longer than necessary. He would be gone soon enough.

Katya followed Luke’s SUV as it bumped down the dirt track that led towards a high, brick-built barn standing commandingly on the brow of a hill, a little way back from the road. It was obviously in the midst of renovations and the SUV came to a halt on a levelled area of gravel with a couple of portable cabins at its edge, painted green in an attempt to blend in with the landscape.

Katya had wondered whether it would be forgivable to stay in the car but dismissed the idea. Olenka was embroiled in a crisis with one of her suppliers and Katya had promised her that she would help Peter choose his kitten. That undertaking could not, by any stretch of the imagination, be accomplished from the car so she followed Luke and Peter past the main door at the front to the back of the barn, where the downward slope of the hill revealed an entrance into another storey beneath the one she’d seen from the road. Inside, the large space had been partitioned and washed down, ready to be decorated.

‘Which one do you think, Katya?’ Luke had made sure that Peter knew how to handle the kittens and then left him to the task of carefully stroking each one of them, taking up a vantage point next to her in the corner of the room.

‘The little one with the black patch over his eye looks like a pirate.’ The tiny creature was the least outgoing of the brood, keeping to the large box that had been lined with cushions and an old rug.

‘Doesn’t he just. Unfortunately he really is blind in that eye.’

‘He was born that way?’

Luke grimaced, shaking his head. ‘Nope. They were abandoned and when someone found them and brought them here, he had an eye infection. We managed to save one eye, but the infection got to the optic nerve in the other and he’s completely blind on that side.’

‘He’ll be difficult to find a home for, then.’ The small creature was hurt and disorientated. Frightened by the world. She had more than an inkling of how that felt.

Luke was looking hard at her, and she avoided his gaze. ‘He has a home.’

‘Good. That’s good.’ Katya didn’t need to ask where. The kitten was already home and he could stay for as long as he wanted. ‘So you’re renovating this place?’ The mellow shades of the old bricks gave it a rustic charm and it seemed a shame to Katya that they’d soon be covered in plaster and paint.

‘Yeah. I brought the kittens down here because it stinks of paint upstairs.’ He opened a door in the partition wall, which revealed a small hallway with a staircase beyond. ‘Peter, you’ll be okay here if we go upstairs for a moment, won’t you?’

‘Yes.’ Clearly the only thing Peter wanted right now was to pet as many kittens at once as possible, and Katya and Luke were both bothersome interruptions to the matter in hand. Katya shrugged, grinning, and followed Luke, latching the door closed behind her to stop any of the kittens from escaping.

The staircase led to the ground-level entrance hall at the front of the building. There was a door to the right and a wide arch to the left, which he ushered her through. ‘What do you think?’

The evening sunlight shimmered across the exposed brickwork and roof beams, giving a feeling of even more space to the already large room. ‘It’s huge! And you’ve left the brickwork.’

‘It’s too good to hide. They’ve been repointed and I had a clear sealant put on there …’ Luke regarded the walls thoughtfully. ‘Turned out more expensive than just covering them up with plasterboard, but I think it’s worth it.’

‘Definitely. It looks fantastic.’ Katya walked to the middle of the space, turning full circle to see everything. ‘What are you going to use this for?’

‘This is the public part of the building. It’s for small exhibitions, lectures, children’s activities.’ He jerked his thumb towards the hallway. ‘The office space is through there, and my veterinary practice is going to be housed downstairs, where Peter is now.’

His enthusiasm for the project was obvious in every line of his face and those long, strong limbs. If it was at all possible, he seemed to stand taller here, his shoulders even squarer, proud of the vast amount of work that had already been done, and ready for the amount needed to complete the project. There had been a time when Katya had been that immersed in her work, and the sudden feeling of loss almost made her choke.

‘Would you like to see the office space?’ His voice was suddenly tender, as if he could see the crushing sadness that had just dumped itself on her shoulders. ‘It’s not finished yet, but …’

‘Yes.’ Katya gave him a bright, brittle smile. Maybe, one day, she’d find something she could put her heart into, where there was no danger of her messing up. Until then, she’d keep making coffee and smiling.