Healing The Md's Heart: Healing the MD's Heart

Chapter Three

The next morning, Lia edged open the door a few inches and looked into the still darkened hospital room, uncertain of her reception despite it being almost seven-thirty. Both still sleeping, neither son nor father knew she was there. She stood in the doorway for a moment simply watching them.

That Duran was sleeping at all surprised her. She couldn’t imagine he was anything approaching comfortable. Awkwardly sitting at his son’s side, he was bent halfway across the bed, one arm crooked under his head for a makeshift pillow, the other stretched out over the blanket to cradle Noah’s small hand in his palm.

His position suggested he couldn’t bear to be even a chair’s length from his son and an odd feeling, both warmth and chill, twisted in her chest. She could imagine the fear and uncertainty Duran lived with constantly; his desperation in trying to hold on to the little person who meant everything to him. It wasn’t with the same intensity, but she, also, understood only too well the fear of losing someone you loved. For Duran—alone save for Noah—that fear at times had to be overwhelming.

Figuring Duran’s night had been too short, she hesitated stepping any further inside, torn between not wanting to disturb him and needing to check on Noah. Concern for Noah won out. Quietly as possible, she moved close to the bed and gently brushed her fingers to Noah’s cheek, pleased to find his skin cool and dry. The light touch made him wriggle and scrunch up his face as he blinked awake.

“Dr. Kerrigan?”

“That’s right,” Lia said barely above a whisper, giving him a reassuring smile. “I just came to check on you and Percy.” She patted the panda’s furry head. “Percy looks pretty good. How do you feel?”

“Okay, I guess.” Noah thought for a moment, then added, “Hungry.”

Lia laughed softly. “I think I can fix that. But I need to check your ears and take your temperature first. Then we’ll see about getting you and your dad some breakfast.”

“Why is Dad still sleeping?” Noah asked, frowning as he looked at his father. “He never sleeps late.” Before Lia could intervene, he pushed at Duran’s arm. “Dad—Dad, Dr. Kerrigan is here.”

Duran stirred and sat up, looking at once disoriented and impossibly sexy. His dark, sleep-mussed hair fell over his brow. He yawned, stretched and with no more than a quick glance Lia’s way, turned full attention to his son.

“Hey, good morning,” he said, smiling as he smoothed Noah’s hair back from his forehead. “You look like you’re feeling a lot better.”

“I woke up before you.”

“I see that. Guess I was being lazy today.”

Noah giggled at that and Lia couldn’t help but smile. She scarcely knew him, but what she had learned of Duran Forrester made for an attractive package: fiercely loving, responsible father, effortlessly sexy guy, a man not easily deterred once he’d chosen a course of action. And—and she needed to stop where this was going because it was so far off course from where her focus should be.

As though he sensed her eyes on him, Duran looked up, giving her half a smile. “Sorry, I didn’t fall asleep until nearly six. You were right about the uncomfortable chair.”

“No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you. I just needed to check on Noah.”

Duran stood up, walking stiffly at first, taking a few paces around the room as Lia bent over Noah, satisfying herself that the antibiotics and fever reducers had done their job. Noah’s temperature was normal again and although it would be a few days before the infection cleared, his ears didn’t seem as painful for him as the night before.

Finishing, she briefly squeezed the boy’s shoulder. “Okay, I think we’ll let you and Percy out of here in a little bit—after breakfast,” she added at his hopeful look. “Give me a few minutes and I’ll see what I can rustle up.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Duran started.

“I promised,” Lia said, winking at Noah as she headed for the door.

She returned fifteen minutes later, backing into the room, balancing the heavy tray.

“Whatever that is it smells great,” Duran said, relieving her of her load.

“Nothing too fancy, I’m afraid, but at least the coffee’s decent. And it’s a definite improvement over the oatmeal they’d be bringing you, Noah. Unless you like your oatmeal kinda gray and sticky?” Noah made a face and Lia laughed. “I didn’t think so. How about some eggs and bagels instead?”

“I think you’ve just saved my life.” Duran, accepting a mug of coffee, breathed an appreciative sigh over the hot brew as Noah dug into his breakfast. “I can go without just about anything—”

“—except decent coffee,” Lia chimed in and they finished the sentence in unison.

“An addict after my own heart, I see.”

“With the hours I keep, believe me, it’s survival.”

Duran smiled, for the first time giving her a full, open gesture of appreciation, unrestrained by reluctance or circumstance. A subtle, insidious heat curled through her, and she cursed it, irritated at herself for being so susceptible to a simple smile that didn’t mean anything except his gratitude for a cup of coffee and her sparing his son overcooked oatmeal.

“Thank you again,” he said, “for everything. You’ve made this whole ordeal a lot easier. Right, guy?” He glanced at Noah.

Noah, in the process of stuffing a chunk of bagel in his mouth, nodded. “I hate hospitals,” he mumbled around the bread. “But you made it not so bad.”

Whatever she could have said stuck in her throat and left her swallowing hard in blank silence. Looking at the trusting smile on Noah’s pale face and the dark hollows shadowing his father’s soulful eyes, she realized father and son had touched her in a way that would leave her marked, this time unable to maintain the detachment necessary to her job—to help them, then move on and forget.

It made no sense. She’d had many patients with serious, even terminal illnesses, but she’d always been able to distance herself enough to remain emotionally protected. She couldn’t very well get deeply involved with the children she’d devoted her life to helping, to care too much, or she wouldn’t be able to function as a professional. She’d learned that lesson well enough over the years. Until Duran Forrester and his little boy showed up, she’d stuck by it religiously.

Why were they different? Why did she feel this connection to them, this urgent need to do anything, everything to help? She had no answers.

“You’re not having any?” Duran asked, jerking her out of her thoughts.

“What? Oh, no, thanks. I’m fine.” She made herself focus on the business at hand. “There are a few things we should talk about, though. I did some checking and the earliest we can start the testing is Tuesday.” Hesitating over whether or not she should bring up what was probably a touchy subject, she gave in to her need for answers and asked, “Were you planning on calling Cort this morning?”

“Calling him, yes.” Duran pushed his coffee mug onto the tray and got to his feet. “Accepting his offer of housing—that I’m rethinking. I appreciate it, but I’m not comfortable with accepting it.”

“Last night—”

“Last night I promised to call him. I didn’t say I’d move in with any of them.”

“They’re family.”

“No, they’re strangers whom I happen to be related to. And I need some place quiet and stable—” He glanced at Noah. “I can better control that in a hotel.”

“I could argue that,” Lia persisted. Maybe she didn’t have a right to interfere, but she knew Duran’s brothers and their families, and she couldn’t believe that they wouldn’t accept Noah as one of their own. In her opinion, that was better medicine right now than any other treatment she could prescribe. “A hotel is impersonal and there aren’t any guarantees you’re going to get the peace and quiet you want. Apart from that, weren’t you the one who said—”

“I want to meet your family!” Noah broke in. “You said I had cousins.”

Lia gestured to Noah, who’d made her point for her. “They aren’t going to get the chance to know him if they never get to meet him.”

His hardened expression clearly said Duran didn’t like where the conversation was headed. For Noah’s sake, though, Lia refused to back down. It might do Duran some good, as well, she reasoned. He’d been shouldering the weight of his son’s illness alone. Support from any quarter had to be better for him than the isolation he’d imposed on himself. She assured herself she was doing the right thing because of Noah, ignoring the little nagging voice at the back of her head that she was far overstepping her boundaries, that she was involving herself in Duran’s life far more than she should.

“I didn’t come here for a family reunion,” Duran said tightly.

“Didn’t you? I thought that was the point.”

“Why are you pushing this? Why is it so important to you?”

She could have answered that in ways that were personal, knowing in part she was letting her feelings about her own family and the distance she’d always felt between them influence her urging Duran to connect with his brothers. “It’s important to you and to Noah,” she answered instead and that was true, too. “Isn’t it why you’re here?”

Noah, oblivious to the tension, asked, “Are cousins like brothers and sisters?”

“Kind of,” Duran answered, his attention on Lia momentarily diverted. “But cousins don’t usually live in the same house as you, like brothers and sisters would.”

“They can be especially good friends, though, because they’re friends and they’re family,” Lia tried to explain, which was difficult, because for her it was only theory.

“I want to meet them,” Noah insisted again, his mouth pulled in a stubborn line as he looked at his father. “You said I could.”

“I know I did. But—” Duran pushed a hand through his hair and blew out a breath. “It’s not that simple.”

“Why?” Noah demanded.

Duran’s frown accused Lia of pursuing a subject he’d wanted to avoid for as long as possible. “For a lot of reasons.” He stopped, seemed to consider for a minute, then finally came to a decision. “I promised you’d meet them and you will. But it might not be right away and I don’t know if staying in the same house with them is a good idea right now.” This last was aimed at Lia and she flushed, knowing she probably deserved the reprimand but was unwilling to back down.

Before she could come back with a defense, the door pushed open and they were confronted with the morning nurse, followed by Cort.

Duran’s eyes snapped to her, but Lia shook her head in denial she’d had anything to do with Cort’s appearance.

“It’s not her fault,” Cort answered Duran’s unspoken question. “I invited myself.”

“Thinks he doesn’t have to follow the rules like everyone else,” the nurse grumbled. Toting a breakfast tray that was about as wide as she was, the nurse took one look at the stack of empty dishes on the table beside Noah and scowled at Lia. “I see someone’s already done my job.”

Lia hustled to explain. “I got here early and—”

“Oh, save it. I’ll take the oatmeal home for Cruiser. Don’t know what that dog sees in mushy oatmeal, but he gets plenty of it.” She flung an accusatory look at Lia. “I suppose you’ve taken the boy’s vitals, too?”

“I did, earlier, but I’m going to release him soon, so if you wouldn’t mind checking them again, I’ll have a quick word with Mr. Forrester and Cort outside.”

“Fine, let me earn my keep, then. You three give me some space.”

Heeding the older woman, Lia gestured Duran and Cort toward the door. “We’ll just be a few minutes,” she reassured Noah, who was eyeing the nurse doubtfully. “Don’t worry, she’s only cranky with adults.”

“Forty years and I still get no respect,” the sassy, rotund nurse muttered as the others left the room.

“Is she—?” Duran nodded to the door.

“No worries,” Lia said. “She’s the best pediatric nurse we have. She just saves her bedside manner for the kids.”

Duran didn’t seem convinced but looked to Cort. “I would have called.”

“I’m sure you would have,” Cort said easily. “But I figured it would be harder for you to turn down my offer in person. This way you can’t hang up on me. So before you give me all the reasons why it won’t work, I’ll tell you that we’ve fixed it so you and Noah can stay at the ranch. My brother Josh used to live in one wing of the house. It’s three rooms and more than big enough for the two of you.”

“I don’t doubt it,” Duran said. “But this is all happening pretty fast. I’m not sure it’s the best place for Noah right now.”

“Trust me, the place is huge. You won’t have to see Jed or Del—my stepmother—if you don’t want to. Jed doesn’t get around much these days, and Del—” Cort grimaced at his mention of Jed Garrett’s wife. “Well, let’s just say she’ll be more than happy to stay out of your way.”

“Noah would probably love being around all the animals,” Lia put in.

Flicking a look at her, Duran said nothing for a moment. “You told Jed about me—us?”

For the first time, Cort looked uneasy. “Yeah, I told him everything. The timing wasn’t ideal. He’s been in Albuquerque for the past few days, seeing some specialist and won’t be back until late this afternoon, so I had to do it by phone. But he knows.”

“And?”

“And it was a shock. But like I predicted last night, once he got past the surprise, he was more than ready to bring two more sons into the family fold.”

Cort’s words and the troubled thread in his voice eroded Lia’s previous confidence that staying at the ranch would be best for Duran and Noah. She’d been thinking of his brothers, instead of remembering who their father was. Jed Garrett might be sick, but it hadn’t softened him, hadn’t, as far as she could tell, caused him to repent his life of taking what he wanted, discarding anything and anyone that had stood in his way of building Rancho Piñtada into one of the biggest and most successful ranch operations in New Mexico. That had included wives, lovers and his own sons, and it was only recently that there had been a tentative attempt on his part to reconcile with the family he’d had no use for.

Duran, though, seemed strong enough in his resolve to save his son to face down any challenge without blinking, even the devil in the form of his newfound father. She’d no doubt that although it might be an awkward and even contentious first meeting, he’d be more than a match for Jed.

“What do you think?” Cort asked her pointedly.

Not liking him putting her on the spot, especially when she was already at odds with Duran over this, Lia forced an even tone. “I think the decision is up to Duran.”

She thought she saw a flash of surprised gratitude in Duran’s eyes, replaced quickly by a conflicted hesitation. “It’s not that I don’t appreciate this—”

“I understand,” Cort said. “We all do, in one way or another. But you don’t know how long you’ll be here. Do you really want Noah living in a hotel for a month or more? Give it a night or two. If it doesn’t work, then we’ll figure out something that will.”

“You know why I’m here,” Duran reminded him. “If staying at the ranch doesn’t work out—”

“Then it doesn’t work out. It doesn’t have anything to do with helping Noah.”

“That’s all any of us want,” Lia couldn’t help adding. She didn’t know what to say that would convince Duran of his brothers’ sincerity. There wasn’t an easy way to describe the family the five of them had become despite the sins of their father that had nearly broken them apart forever.

She admired them, Sawyer, Rafe, Cort, Josh and Cruz. Somehow, against the odds and despite Jed, they had reconciled and become a true family. Lia envied them that, the bond they had.

And yet it would be tested once again, in a way none of them had expected. There were two more Garrett brothers now, strangers both, and one with a desperate need to find the person who could save his son’s life.

Yet the fierce resolve in Cort’s eyes answered the question of whether he and the others would stand together to help. “When you release Noah, they’re coming back to the ranch with me,” he said, leaving no room for argument. “You want to come along and help them get settled? You’d be best at explaining all the details of Noah’s illness and what we need to do for the testing. Laurel and the kids are going to be there, too. We thought they’d be company for Noah.”

Lia glanced at Duran, searching for a clue that he wanted her. He looked steadily back, seemingly searching himself before giving a brief nod. “Okay then, I’ll get the paperwork started. If you’re sure?” she asked him, still uncertain if he’d actually agreed to Cort’s plan.

“I’m not sure,” he said flatly. “But I’m not being given much of a choice.”

“Then don’t go.”

“No.” He shifted his gaze between her and Cort. “I’m going to give it a try, mostly because I promised Noah and I’m not going to go back on that.” Turning, his hand on the door, he started back to his son, and over his shoulder, without looking at either of them, said, “I just hope I’m not going to regret it.”

Five minutes after walking into the great room of Rancho Piñtada, Duran discovered the drawback to being raised an only child—being completely unprepared for the chaos and noise of a large family.

It was more than he’d hoped for. But it was also more than he’d anticipated, to the point that the combination of stress, lack of sleep, and being introduced to the confusing assembly of four of his brothers, Sawyer, Cort, Rafe and Josh and Cort’s wife Laurel and their four children, Tommy, Angela, Sophia and Quin, was beginning to feel overwhelming. The oldest brother, Cruz, had called to say he’d be a little late for the family meeting, and Duran could only be thankful for one less person in the room and hope he’d be coming alone.

Noah lingered at his side, looking both intimidated and excited. He stared wide-eyed as Tommy, who seemed to Duran to be about twelve or thirteen, played the role of Bigfoot, chasing his much younger siblings around the room. His son was used to a quiet house and often only his imagination and toys for company. He could feel Noah fairly quivering with anticipation, wanting to join in and yet unsure of whether he could or should.

Sidestepping out of the way as one of the girls dodged around him, Rafe gave Duran a knowing look. “Be glad we left the other ankle biters at home,” he commented with a shake of his head. “When they’re all together, it’s a lot worse.”

Duran briefly wondered exactly how many of them there were and then thought of Ry. From the little time he’d spent with his twin, he got the impression that for Ry, family ties—ties to anyone—were something to be avoided at all costs. He suspected for Ry, a meeting like this would be akin to slow torture.

“Tommy, why don’t you take Noah out and show him the new foal?” Laurel made the suggestion over the rising ruckus in the ranch great room, giving an exasperated shake of her head when it went unacknowledged by her oldest son. She turned to Duran. “Would that be all right with you? There’s a brand new baby on the ranch and she’s just beautiful.”

“I don’t—I’m not sure Noah is up to a long walk right now,” he hedged, trying for a diplomatic way to say no. Though he didn’t doubt Laurel meant well, he wasn’t ready to entrust his son to people he’d barely met, related or not.

Silently urging her to back him up he glanced at Lia, sitting to the other side of Noah.

He’d argued with himself, even up to the moment he was standing at the front door of the ranch, over whether her coming along was a good idea or not. He’d wanted her there, for Noah’s sake and his own.

She was Noah’s pediatrician, at least while they were here. Noah had had other doctors, but he sensed Lia cared more deeply for Noah. And that counted for a lot. Besides, he wanted her there, for Noah’s sake and his own, because her empathy for their situation and her knowing his brothers and Jed Garrett eased the difficulties of first meetings and explanations. Although they’d disagreed over his staying at the ranch, in his mind she was still his strongest supporter here, and he hoped in this, her understanding of the situation would lead her to add her own objections to Laurel’s suggestion.

“Can I go, Dad?” Noah tugged at his sleeve. “I feel fine now. Dr. Kerrigan said I was fine.” He turned to Lia in hopeful appeal.

“I said you were better,” Lia amended gently. Over Noah’s head, her eyes met Duran’s. “I don’t think a short walk would hurt, as long as you took it slow. But it’s up to your dad. He might want you to keep him company since he’s in a strange place and doesn’t really know anybody.”

“You’re here. He knows you,” Noah persisted. “Please, Dad. I want to go.”

“Noah—” His first instinct to say no battled with wanting to let Noah explore and enjoy being a part of a group of kids. It so rarely happened and he hated that his son had spent so much of his short life lonely.

“Please?” Noah looked over to where Tommy in his role of Bigfoot with Quin, a sturdy toddler, clinging to his back, was about to pounce on his little sisters and then at Duran with that wide-eyed pleading expression that never failed to break the back of Duran’s resolve.

“You don’t have to worry about Tommy,” Josh put in. “He’s as good as Rafe and me at knowin’ his way around the ranch. And since he’s the oldest, he’s had lots of practice at keepin’ an eye on the littler ones.”

“Tommy’s very responsible,” Laurel added, a touch of pride in her voice. Tommy’s mock ferocious snarl elicited high-pitched shrieks from the girls and Laurel winced. “Okay, enough. Tommy—stop growling.” She walked over and scooped up Quin. “The girls are getting completely out of control. Why don’t you take them and Noah on a walk to the barn and show Noah the new filly? Slowly, though, Noah just got out of the hospital.”

“Sure.” Tommy gestured to Noah, “Come on, let’s get outta here.”

“Take your sisters by the hand,” Cort insisted. “Don’t let them wander off.”

“Come on, Dad, they can—”

“Tommy.”

Cort’s tone was enough to silence his son. “Fine, I’ll take Angela and you take Sophie,” he told Noah, gently pushing the smallest girl toward him.

For a moment, Sophie contemplated Noah with big black eyes and then grinned. Noah looked to Duran and Duran smiled. “It’s okay. Take her hand and stay close. And no running, okay?”

Hesitantly, Noah pushed off the couch and stood there, staring at Sophie as if he wasn’t sure what part of her to hold on to.

With none of Noah’s reticence, Sophie grabbed his hand and tugged. “Let’s go see the pony!”

Then Noah beamed back and Duran knew he’d made the right choice. “No longer than an hour,” he said as his son let Sophie pull him toward the front door.

“You keep track of the time, Tommy,” Cort called to his son as the four kids made a noisy exit.

“He’ll be fine.” Without him noticing, Lia had shifted a little closer and spoke only for him, following his gaze to the empty place his son had just left.

She touched his hand, a brief brush of her fingers, intended to punctuate her reassurance, and for a moment, Duran had the urge to grasp hers as if she were the tether that would keep him anchored above the confusion of feelings and people and remind him of what was important.

Instead, he let the feeling pass and settled for a half nod, half shrug.

Although she smiled a little in return, her eyes were troubled. She answered some comment of Laurel’s but Duran felt and saw her watching him, slantways, pretending her attention was elsewhere but keeping him in view in a way that was almost protective.

Before he could decide how he felt about that, the front door flung open and a man strode in to join the company. From his strong resemblance to Sawyer and Cort, Duran guessed this was Cruz Déclan, his opinion justified a moment later when the man walked up and offered his hand as Duran got to his feet.

“You must be Duran,” he said. “I’m Cruz. Welcome to the family.”