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“That kiss last night, it wasn’t an impulse. I wanted to kiss you from the minute I saw you at the shelter. My big hit, ‘Impossible to Forget,’ I wrote that song because of you.”
Eve swallowed. She wanted to look away, but she couldn’t. Even when he reached for her hand, her gaze remained glued to his. When he gently pulled her toward him, her stupid heart began to race, and even though her brain screamed Danger! Danger! No! Stop! Don’t do it! she didn’t resist when he drew her into his arms.
“I want you, Eve.”
She closed her eyes as his lips grazed her cheek and drifted down to her neck.
“I’ve always wanted you,” he whispered.
Every nerve ending in her body seemed to be alive with sensation. And when he raised his head to capture her mouth, she moaned, and instead of stopping him, she kissed him back as if her very life depended upon it …
* * *
The Crandall Lake Chronicles: Small town, big hearts
The Girl He
Left Behind
Patricia Kay
www.millsandboon.co.uk
Formerly writing as Trisha Alexander, PATRICIA KAY is a USA TODAY bestselling author of more than forty-eight novels of contemporary romance and women’s fiction. She lives in Houston, Texas. To learn more about her, visit her website at www.patriciakay.com.
This book is dedicated to Dick, with whom I shared fifty-three years of adventures. We all love and miss you!
Contents
Cover
Introduction
Title Page
About the Author
Dedication
Epigraph
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
ANNA CERMAK’S PIEROGIES
ANNA CERMAK’S STUFFED CABBAGE ROLLS (HALUPKI)
Note from the Author
Extract
Copyright
“There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably desirable.”
—Mark Twain
Prologue
The boy stands under the overhang, guitar case in hand, his backpack stuffed with his belongings. The bus will arrive any minute. Beyond the overhang the rain falls steadily. It has been raining for days here in the Texas Hill Country.
His gaze sweeps the station platform.
Is she coming?
He’d told her she had to be here no later than eight o’clock. The station clock now reads eight twelve. The bus is due to leave the station at eight fifteen. The boy looks at his phone again. Should he risk calling her house? But what if her father answers? For at least the hundredth time since they’d become a couple, he curses her father’s stupid rules. Eve is one of the few girls left in their senior class who doesn’t yet have a cell phone. He has no way of contacting her without alerting her parents.
He looks around slowly, hoping this time he’ll see her, that she’ll be out of breath from hurrying, saying how sorry she is that she made him wait, that she didn’t say yes when he first started talking about her coming with him, that she made him worry. But she’s not there. The only other person on the platform is an older man who was already there when the boy arrived.
She’s not coming.
His heart thuds painfully as the truth sinks in. Yet he isn’t really surprised. Down deep, hasn’t he always known she wouldn’t come? That he’s never been good enough for her? Hasn’t he been lying to himself all along, pretending she would change her mind and come because he didn’t want to think about the alternative?
You’re on your own. She doesn’t love you enough to defy her family. You knew she wouldn’t leave home. It was never gonna happen. Forget about her. The two of you together was always a fairy tale, and you’ve never believed in fairy tales.
He thinks about how he’d once told Aaron to grow up, saying, “There ain’t no Santa Claus, kid, and you might as well get used to it!”
He sighs. Yeah, there ain’t no Santa Claus. And there sure as hell wasn’t gonna be a happy ever after for him. Not with Eve anyhow. He’d have to make his own happy ever after by making his dream of a career in music come true.
The hiss of air brakes heralds the arrival of the bus, and the boy pulls his baseball cap more firmly on his head and darts through the rain toward the opening doors.
Two minutes later, as the bus pulls away from the station, heading east toward his future, the boy gives one last, long look at the town where he’s spent all eighteen years of his life so far.
Then he turns resolutely away. No more looking at the past. From now on, he will only look forward.
Chapter One
Twelve years later...
Eve Kelly stared at the headline.
Adam Crenshaw and Version II Launching Fall Tour in Austin
She could hardly believe her eyes.
Adam.
Adam was finally coming home. He would be performing in Austin. Which was less than an hour away. Eve swallowed while the enormity of what she’d just read in the online version of the Austin American-Statesman sank in.
Twelve years. It had been twelve years since the day Adam had ridden out of her life. Twelve years to wonder if she’d done the right thing or if her long-ago decision had been the worst one she’d ever made.
She sighed heavily. Read the accompanying story quickly. There wasn’t a whole lot of information, just the fact that Adam Crenshaw and his band would be opening their North American tour in Austin at the Frank Erwin Center the first week of September, and that tickets would go on sale next month. The reporter also mentioned that this would be the first time Adam’s band had performed in Texas even though he had grown up in Crandall Lake. There was a photo of the band with Adam front and center, but it had been taken from a distance, and his head was bent over his guitar, so she couldn’t see his face.
“Time to head out, Eve. You gonna come to Ernie’s, have a drink with us?”
Eve started. She hadn’t heard Penny Wallace, one of her coworkers, approach. She glanced up and smiled. “Thanks, but I can’t. I have to stop at the supermarket, then pick up the twins and take them over to Bill’s.”
“They spending the week with him?”
Eve nodded. “Yeah.”
“Okay. See you on Monday.”
After Penny walked off, Eve shut down her computer and gathered her things. Her head was still full of the startling news about Adam, but she couldn’t sit here and think about it, nor could she call her cousin Olivia to tell her the news. Not if she wanted to get the twins to her ex’s by six thirty, as promised.
Fifteen minutes later, she strode into her favorite supermarket and headed straight into the produce department. She was having Olivia for dinner the following night and needed fresh salad stuff. She also wanted to be sure to send some fruit with the twins tonight. Maybe she couldn’t compete with Missy, their stepmother, as far as baking cakes and pies from scratch, but she could make sure the twins had plenty of fresh fruit while they were there.
The market was crowded, but Eve knew exactly what she needed and where to find it, so within twenty minutes she was standing in the checkout line. She’d chosen the shortest line, but there were still two people ahead of her. Friday nights were always so busy. People stopped in after work rather than have to make a separate trip later or the following day. Idly, she glanced at the magazine rack to her left while she waited. And did a double take as she saw the newest issue of People magazine.
The cover screamed Sexiest Man Alive! Adam Crenshaw!
And there was a head shot of Adam, smiling out at her, taking up the entire cover, and looking even handsomer than normal. She swallowed painfully as she took in his shining, longish brown hair and unusual gray eyes. His face bore a fashionable stubble, and the dimple in his left cheek was prominently displayed by his sexy, crooked smile. For years, ever since Adam had become successful, people had compared his good looks to another country idol, Keith Urban, but Eve thought Adam was even better looking. She knew Nicole Kidman would probably disagree with her. But then, both of them had to be prejudiced.
Eve grabbed the top copy of the magazine and furtively put it into her shopping cart. She knew she was asking for heartache, but she couldn’t resist reading about Adam’s life. Reading about all the things she could have had and had rejected.
The two of you would probably have split up by now.
Eve closed her eyes, but the words in her head wouldn’t go away. It was stupid to speculate on what might have been if she’d made a different choice all those years ago, and yet she couldn’t seem to stop herself. Thankfully, before she’d had time to continue with her morose thoughts, it was her turn to check out, and she no longer had time to think about anything other than the task at hand—watching carefully to make sure she wasn’t overcharged for anything.
But when the checker scanned the magazine, she grinned, and with a twang that announced she’d probably grown up in East Texas said, “He sure is a hottie, isn’t he? And to think he grew up right here in Crandall Lake!”
“Mmm,” Eve said.
“So do you know him?” the checker persisted.
Eve frowned. “Me? Uh, no.” The last thing she wanted to do was discuss Adam Crenshaw.
“Oh. I thought maybe you were about his age.”
Eve shrugged, hoping she’d discouraged the girl.
“I sure would love to see him. He’s comin’ to Austin, him and his band. Did you know that?”
Eve forced a smile. “No, I didn’t.” Please just finish checking me out and stop talking!
Finally the girl ran out of steam and a few minutes later, Eve was out of the store and loading her groceries into her car. Resolutely, she pushed every last thought of Adam out of her mind. Time enough to think about him again after the twins were gone tonight. Until then, she would simply be Eve Kelly, mother of Natalie and Nathan, and nothing more.
* * *
Adam Crenshaw swore softly. He’d been working on a new song for days and was having problems with the bridge. Nothing he tried sounded right. “Dammit,” he said again, frowning and setting his guitar down with a tired sigh. He rubbed his forehead. A headache had been hovering for hours, and he was afraid it was finally going to come. He’d better take some Advil and head it off. His headaches were notorious and could lay him low for days once one took hold.
After gulping down the Advil and pouring himself a glass of iced tea, he picked up his phone and texted his brother.
That contract ready yet?
It only took a moment for Austin’s reply.
Yep. Sending in a few mins.
Adam smiled. The money he’d spent on his brother’s education hadn’t been wasted. Austin was a crackerjack lawyer and took care of every financial and legal aspect of Adam’s career. Adam trusted him more than anyone else in the world.
Turning back to his guitar, he strummed the last few chords before the bridge, hoping for inspiration. And, as happened sometimes, an idea struck, but before he’d had time to get it down on paper, his office door opened and his publicist, Bethany D’Angelo, walked in.
He looked up in annoyance. “Don’t you ever knock?” He didn’t try to hide his irritation.
She raised her eyebrows. “Aren’t we in a bad mood today?” Parking her backside on the corner of his desk, she crossed her legs and grinned at him. “Did we get up on the wrong side of the bed, sweetums?”
He gritted his teeth, hating the way she talked in the third person and called him various pet names. She was thirty-one years old, for God’s sake, and just because he’d stupidly become sexually involved with her a few months back didn’t give her the right to act as if she owned him. This wasn’t the first time he’d had the almost uncontrollable urge to fire her on the spot. But he stopped himself in time, and “I have a headache” was all he said.
“Oh, baby, I’m sorry. Did you take something for it?”
“Yes, I took something.”
“How about if I rub your shoulders and neck? That’ll help, too.” She dropped her voice to what she considered her sexy tone. “Then later, I could do something else for you, which I know would make you feel even better.”
“I’m having problems with this new song,” he said, just as if he hadn’t heard her, “and I was just about to have a breakthrough when you interrupted me.”
“Oh, you always say you’re having problems.”
There was something about her airy dismissal of his concerns that nearly pushed him over the edge, but once again, he managed to control himself. Maybe he was being unfair. Just because he was bored with their relationship and wanted out didn’t mean he was allowed to act like a total jerk and be nasty to her. After all, she hadn’t thrown herself into his bed. He’d made the first move. It wasn’t her fault he’d almost immediately known he’d made a huge mistake. So the right thing to do was tell her, straight-out, in a nice way, that from now on their dealings would be strictly business. Then, if she felt she couldn’t handle that change in their status, she would quit on her own. If not, they’d go forward as adults.
Forcing his voice into a more pleasant tone, he said, “Did you want something, Bethany?”
“As a matter of fact, I did. I wanted to remind you of your interview with Rolling Stone at seven tonight.”
“Oh, crap.” He had forgotten all about the interview.
“Now, Adam, landing the cover story of Rolling Stone is a remarkable coup for you. Coming on top of the People thing just a few months before the launch of your tour and a new album... Well, it’s fabulous!”
He sighed. “Yeah, yeah, I know. But I hate interviews.”
“You’ve told me that a hundred times. And as I’ve told you, Aaron can’t do everything for you. There are some things you simply must do yourself.” Gone was the seductress voice. Now Bethany was all business.
In mentioning Aaron, she was referring to the fact that his youngest brother now functioned as Adam’s alter ego in matters of publicity, especially his online presence. Aaron, who at twenty-five was five years younger than Adam, pretended to be Adam on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Pinterest, in responding to various blogs and fan sites, as well as interacting with his fan clubs.
Adam hated all that garbage. Always had. He didn’t hate his fans, of course—he liked meeting them, especially at concerts—but if he spent all his time online and doing interviews, when would he be able to write his music? All he’d ever wanted was to write and perform, not blow his own horn about how great he was. It still amazed him that anyone cared about all that stuff entertainers posted. Hell, Aaron even told Adam’s followers what he, Adam, had supposedly eaten for breakfast!
“Yeah, I know he can’t,” he finally said.
Bethany studied him steadily. “So you won’t try to blow off the interview, right?”
“I guess not,” he said reluctantly. “But I’ll never change my mind that it’s the music that counts. Not all this other stuff.”
She rolled her eyes. “I’m tired of this old argument, Adam. Yes, the music is important. Of course it is. But having your name and face out there, connecting with all those people who plunk down their money to buy your music and see your shows is equally important. In the long run, maybe even more important. And Rolling Stone! I mean, you’ve arrived. They hardly ever put a country star on their cover. The fact they want you means they consider you a crossover artist, and isn’t that what you wanted?”
Before he could answer, his cell rang and he saw it was Austin calling.
“Gotta take this,” he said, waving Bethany off.
Accepting the call, he said, “Hey, bro. What’s up? Thought you were gonna send over that contract.”
“I am. I will. But something’s happened,” Austin said.
“Oh?”
“Mom’s had a heart attack.”
“What?” Adam stood. “When?”
Bethany, alerted by his tone, frowned and got off his desk.
“Right after I texted you, she collapsed. I called 911 and I’m riding in the ambulance on the way to the hospital right now. They’ve got her stabilized but it’s pretty serious. I think you need to come.”
“Of course. You’re sure she’s gonna be okay?”
“They think so, but we’ll see what the docs say when we get there.”
“Okay. Keep me posted. I’ll try to get out on a flight tonight.”
“What?” Bethany said when he hung up. “What do you mean, get out on a flight tonight? You have that interview tonight, Adam!”
“This is more important.” He quickly explained what Austin had told him.
Bethany opened her mouth, probably to protest, but closed it again when she saw the look on his face. She sighed wearily. “Okay, I’ll call Rolling Stone and explain. Hopefully they can postpone the interview for a few days and still make their deadline.”
“Don’t make any promises. I have no idea how long I’ll be gone.” Adam was already packing up the stuff on his desk that he wanted to take with him.
“What do you mean? Surely you won’t be gone that long.”
His voice hardened. “I said, don’t make any promises. I’ll call you when I know my mother’s condition.”
“I could come with you...” she said hopefully. “I can take care of everything from—”
“It’s better if I go alone,” he said, cutting her off.
“But—”
Ignoring her, he strode out to the hallway where his secretary, Donna, had a desk. “Donna, get me on a flight to Austin tonight, however you can. And I’ll need a rental car when I get there.” Unfortunately, his personal plane was down for repairs.
“Okay.”
“I’ll be upstairs packing. Oh, and get me some cash, too, will you?”
Because he knew she expected it, and because he was in no mood for any kind of scene right now, he told Bethany goodbye, dropped a hasty kiss on her lips and said he’d be in touch.
Then he headed up to his bedroom to begin preparing for his first trip home to Crandall Lake since the day twelve years ago when he’d boarded the bus that had brought him here to Nashville—and success beyond his wildest dreams.
* * *
Eve drove slowly home after dropping the twins at Bill’s. It was always a wrench to see them leave. Sharing custody with him by alternating weeks was the fairest thing to do, she knew that, but just because it was fair didn’t mean she had to love it. She missed the twins when they were gone. Okay, so they were only fifteen minutes away, just on the other side of Crandall Lake, but the truth was, they might as well have been on the moon in comparison to where they lived with her.
After the divorce, Eve had stayed in the starter home she and Bill had bought a few months after they were married. Well, he’d bought it. She certainly hadn’t had any money to contribute. She was only eighteen and barely out of high school. He was twenty-two and had been working at a good job for almost a year, ever since his graduation from college. The house was a small ranch style with three bedrooms, two baths and an attached garage. The only thing that made it different from its neighbors was the front porch Bill had paid extra to have added because he knew how much she loved having a front porch with a swing. Although the neighborhood was quiet and nice, it wasn’t anything special, and it was on the wrong side of town in terms of prestige.
Bill and his new family, on the other hand, lived in the most fashionable part of Crandall Lake, right near the park and the river. Their home was a stately five-bedroom Colonial on a heavily wooded lot. There was a beautiful pool and they even had a tennis court. Bill was an avid tennis player.
Bill’s new wife, Melissa, had already given him a child. Will was eleven months old, and the twins were crazy about him. They were crazy about Melissa, too, whom they called Missy. For days, it was “Missy this” and “Missy that” after they’d spent a week with Bill. Their attachment to Bill’s new family was a continual source of disquiet to Eve. She worried that because she was a working mother with limited time, and Melissa was a stay-at-home mother who always had lots of time to bake and play with her two and their baby brother, that one day the twins would prefer to live with their father full-time.
How would she handle it if that happened? There was no way she’d agree, of course, but what good would refusing do her if the twins resented her for it? She didn’t want them by default. She wanted them to want to be with her.
Olivia was always telling her she worried way too much, that she borrowed trouble, but Eve couldn’t seem to help it. She was a worrier, always had been. “Anyway,” as she’d told Olivia just last week when they were discussing the scary possibility Eve might be laid off from the paper, “I don’t have to borrow anything. Trouble just seems to find me!”
Thinking about the twins and Bill and the whole rumored-layoff thing had pushed all thoughts of Adam Crenshaw out of her mind, but when she arrived home and saw the People magazine lying in the middle of her kitchen table, they came rushing back.
Did he ever think about her?
Wonder how she was doing?
Weigh those two little words—what if?
She doubted it. Because he had never, not once in all these years, tried to contact her. And unlike her failed attempts to call him in those early days, it would have been easy for him. After all, she had been here in Crandall Lake the entire time.
Quit torturing yourself. Throw the stupid magazine away. Adam Crenshaw lives in a different world, one you’ll never be a part of. And that’s the way it was always meant to be. You knew that at the time. You have built a good life here. You need to remember that and stop mooning over what might have been.
The magazine gave a satisfying thud as it hit the wastebasket.
Chapter Two
Donna had gotten him a seat on a red-eye arriving in Austin at one in the morning. As the plane banked, preparing to approach, Adam gazed down at the lights of the city. Although he was tired, he could never sleep while flying.
By the time they landed and Adam picked up his rental car, he knew it would be close to 3:00 a.m. before he arrived in Crandall Lake. Austin had wanted him to stay with him, but Adam didn’t like being in someone else’s home—he liked his privacy—so his brother had booked a room at the Crandall Lake Inn. Adam couldn’t help smiling wryly at the thought of him, a boy from the wrong side of the tracks, the eldest of the “wild Crenshaw boys,” actually staying at the posh inn. Of course, it might no longer be posh. He might find it had gone from its long-ago glory to a faded facsimile.
But as he pulled into the driveway of the three-story inn, he saw that it had retained much of its charm. In fact, it still looked elegant and the kind of place that attracted only the best. Adam wondered if he would be considered part of that elite circle now.
“Mr. Crenshaw? Welcome to the Crandall Lake Inn.” The young woman at the desk gave him a bright smile, and he could see the excitement in her eyes. “I hope you had a good trip.”