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www.millsandboon.co.uk
To Mike
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Epilogue
Chapter 1
Two sets of bubbles rose from the scuba divers off the west coast of Vancouver Island. Chloe Bennett, wrapped in a duffel coat against the chill January air, watched the spreading ripples intersect and wondered which set of bubbles belonged to her husband, Daniel, and which belonged to Evan, her former lover?
Her nineteen-year-old daughter, Brianna, poked about in tide pools, and Chloe could see her glowing blond head as she wandered between granite boulders as large and smooth as a whale’s back. Other questions surfaced, which Chloe had given up pondering years earlier. Who had fathered the child who’d brought her and Daniel to the altar—Evan or her husband?
Chloe worried about Daniel. Evan was a highly experienced scuba diver, but Daniel was a novice and this deep-water shipwreck was quite possibly beyond his present capability. Only Chloe knew that his confidence was at least partly feigned. Only she knew he was there in large part because he was determined not to show weakness in front of his rival.
She wrapped her duffel coat tighter and shivered at the memory of the rage in Daniel’s eyes as the men had suited up on the cobblestone beach between the towering cedar trees. She understood his hostility toward Evan, but why had he turned on her? Was it possible Daniel had overheard her conversation with Evan at the house before the dive?
Twenty years earlier…
“Don’t cry, sweetheart.” Esme dabbed at the delicate skin beneath her daughter’s eyes and the damp tissue came away smudged with dark brown mascara. “This is the happiest day of your life.”
“I think I’m going to be sick.” Chloe swallowed and pressed a trembling hand to her stomach, which was cinched tight in ivory satin. A worn pair of ballet shoes hung by their pink ribbons from a knob on her old brass bed, a reminder of the career she was giving up just as she was reaching her peak.
“Nerves,” Esme pronounced with a bright smile. “All brides get cold feet before the ceremony.” She tossed away the used tissue and pushed at Chloe’s wispy red-gold bangs with her beringed fingers. “Turn around and let me adjust your veil.”
“Mom, stop!” Chloe clutched her mother’s wrists with icy fingers. “It’s not nerves. It’s morning sickness.”
Esme’s dark blue eyes widened. “You’re joking.”
“I wish I was,” Chloe said bitterly. “Why do you think I’m getting married?”
“I’d hoped it was for love.” Esme’s gaze skimmed Chloe’s thin, muscular figure for any hint of a pregnancy. “You’ve only been seeing Daniel for a few months. Before that you were head over heels for that Australian doctor who went to work in the refugee camp. What was his name?”
“Evan.” Brilliant, handsome, charming Evan had lit up her life like a bolt of summer lightning before leaving for Sudan and plunging her world into darkness. That they’d fought before he’d left added another layer to her misery. Fresh tears spilled over Chloe’s lower lashes and she grabbed another tissue from the box on the maple dresser.
Esme sat Chloe on the bed and put an arm around her. “Is the baby Evan’s? There was something about him I didn’t like. He was a little too glib, if you ask me.”
“You only met him once, so that’s hardly fair.” Wearily, Chloe shrugged her lace-covered shoulders. “I don’t know whose baby I’m carrying. Daniel and I spent only one night together, but it could also be his.”
Dependable, solid Daniel, a man of few words and kind deeds. She couldn’t have found anyone more different than Evan, if she’d tried. After that first impetuous night with Daniel she’d leaned on him, taking comfort in his steady companionship. In the months following Evan’s departure, however, it was hard not to compare Daniel’s predictable ways to Evan’s quicksilver charm.
Esme rubbed Chloe’s back as if she were comforting a young child. “You don’t have to have the baby. Aside from the question of paternity, it’ll put a crimp in your ballet career. You’ve worked hard for years and you’re finally a soloist.”
Chloe twisted the tissue into a knot in her hands. “When I think of Evan traveling across the world to save other children’s lives, how could I do that? I want this baby, Mom. I really do.”
“But you shouldn’t marry Daniel if you don’t love him,” Esme argued. “It’s not fair to him.”
“He knows I don’t love him—not in the way I feel about Evan. He says that what matters is for the baby to have a mom and a dad. I like Daniel a lot, Mom. He’s really good to me. And he wants the baby, even if it isn’t his.”
“What if Evan comes back?”
Chloe sniffed and dabbed at her nose. “He didn’t want to get engaged or make any sort of promise. Two years is a long time, but I thought what we had was special. The worst part is we didn’t make up before he left. I wrote him twice—once to tell him about the baby, and then to let him know I was getting married.
“He didn’t reply to either of my letters. I kept hoping he’d show up in time to stop the wedding.” She drew in a deep breath and then let it out. “I guess it’s too late now.”
“Regardless of Evan, it’s not too late to back out,” Esme urged. “It would be hard on Daniel, but he would understand. You could come back home for a while, and your father and I would help with the baby. Marriage is a commitment you shouldn’t make unless you’re one hundred percent happy about it.”
Chloe shook her head. “I can’t. You should have seen Daniel’s face when I told him I was pregnant. He was so happy, you’d think we’d planned it.”
When her mother started to protest, Chloe added quickly, “It’s not just for his sake that I agreed to get married. My baby deserves a father, and I know Daniel will make a good one.” She tugged at the tissue, and it fell apart in her hands. “I’ll never have another love like Evan, and so I might as well do what’s best for my child.”
“Well, if that’s really what you want…” Esme’s loving face softened into a thoughtful smile. “Maybe the baby will bring you and Daniel together.”
“That’s what he said.” Chloe twisted the diamond ring—more than Daniel could afford—that weighed down her left hand. “I hope you’re right.”
Esme held her daughter’s tight. “Daniel’s a fine man. I’m sure you’ll grow to love him.”
A horn honked on the street below. Daniel was forgotten as Chloe ran to the window, every fantasy she’d entertained over the past month rushing to the surface. Evan was here to stop the wedding and whisk her away. He wanted her baby, even if it wasn’t his; he loved her more than life itself.
The car outside was a white stretch limousine.
Feet sounded on the stairs. Jasmine, Chloe’s best friend and maid of honor, hurried in, her dark curls bouncing above a pale blue taffeta gown. “Your father’s here to take us to the church.”
Reality settled like a cloak of chain mail around Chloe’s shoulders, pulling her back to earth. Slowly she turned away from the window. There would be no last-minute romantic escape. She was marrying Daniel Bennett and that was that.
Blinking away her tears, she smiled and did her best to inject a lightness into her voice. “Here comes the bride.”
Daniel’s heart overflowed with joy and relief as he watched Chloe follow her bridesmaids in a slow procession down the aisle. Contrary to his fears, she hadn’t backed out at the last minute. In her shimmering dress, with burnished hair piled high, she looked like a princess. He tried to catch her eye, but her attention was fixed on the altar.
Daniel’s gaze dropped to Chloe’s stomach, which was hidden by a bouquet of freesias and white roses. “Who gets married these days just because the girl is pregnant?” Rob, his brother and best man, had asked.
Daniel’s answer had been simple, “I do.”
How was it possible to love a woman as much as he loved Chloe, when she didn’t love him back? He hadn’t been looking for a wife; he was just a carpenter working on the construction of new homes, without a thought for the future. He’d taken his dirty clothes to the Laundromat and there she’d been, weeping over another man’s dirty shirt.
Rob thought he was a sap for getting involved with a woman on the rebound, but Daniel didn’t care. Chloe’s relationship with Evan was over—she’d told him so. Daniel had never met anyone like her. Small and bright, lively and graceful, she reminded him of a robin, vivid red against a snow-covered fence, a sure sign that spring was on its way.
He hadn’t intended to drink quite so much that first night. He’d simply tagged along to look out for her while she drowned her sorrows, but she’d insisted he match her glass for glass. Even then, it had been she who had pulled him into bed—not that he’d put up any resistance.
Daniel glanced around the packed church, which was filled with smiling, happy people. Dozens of his relatives were there, and Chloe had also invited numerous friends. Guests who couldn’t find seats stood in a throng behind the back pew. There, a blond man with a three-day beard and rumpled black shirt caught Daniel’s eye. Alone, among the many guests, this man was scowling.
Daniel’s uneasy gaze moved back to Chloe. She was almost at the head of the aisle, gripping her father’s arm with white knuckles. Then she took her place beside Daniel. Daniel’s fingers curled into his palms, but he kept his smile steady and his gaze loving. No one was forcing her to marry him. Sure, she had doubts; that was understandable. That’s why she needed him to be strong, certain.
The ceremony was brief, but to Daniel at least it was full of meaning. The solemn words and religious ritual sanctified their union, assured him that this marriage was meant to be. The legal bond gave him rights. The child gave him responsibilities. Chloe gave him…Well, Chloe had given him herself. And he intended to keep her.
“I do.” She smiled at him, her voice tremulous but sincere.
“I do.” His fingers shook as he slid the wedding band onto her finger.
Daniel kissed his bride. It was brief but, oh, so sweet. A surge of love and a fierce desire to protect and cherish her welled up in Daniel as he smiled into her eyes. Then they turned as one and walked down the aisle. The flowers decorating the pews gave off a heady scent. Chloe’s hand felt small and cold nestled inside Daniel’s, like a wounded bird seeking refuge.
He glanced sideways at her clean, sharp profile and his heart soared. The baby would complete the job the ceremony had begun and bind them with love and purpose.
Then he became aware of movement among the guests to his left. The blond man in the black shirt was edging his way to the front. Chloe noticed him a split second later. Daniel felt her hand tighten in his, heard her faint gasp. Evan, her ex-lover. Chloe’s step faltered. Daniel supported her elbow and bore her out the door and down the steps. Away, he had to get her away.
They had almost reached the waiting limo when she glanced over her shoulder. Her entire being strained backward and Daniel read the terrible truth in Chloe’s eyes, as a blizzard of confetti swirled around them.
She still loved Evan. He wondered if she always would.
Evan prowled the perimeter of the reception hall like a wolf circling a rival’s territory. He was the un-invited guest and he felt like howling. He’d come straight from the airport—his unpacked suitcase was still in the trunk of his rental car. His fingers rubbed against the stubble on his jaw. He hadn’t even taken time to shave.
Chloe and her new husband were seated at the brightly lit head table, looking as stiff as the plastic figurines atop the wedding cake. Chloe’s eyes followed Evan’s progress around the room, tethering him to the hall with her longing. The groom was aware of Evan, too, and his dark eyes smoldered with anger and resentment.
Why had she tied herself to this doltish lumberjack of a man, Evan wondered. She’d moved toward that altar as if she were a virgin on her way to be sacrificed. Her nearly illegible note, dashed off in haste and smudged with her tears, had explained that she was pregnant. Whose baby was it?
Evan picked a glass of champagne off the tray of a passing waiter. Was theirs a once-in-a-lifetime love, as Chloe had maintained? Certainly his feelings for her were strong enough to make him catch the first flight out of Khartoum after receiving her letter. That had surprised even him but, then, he was always prepared, physically and mentally, for a quick departure.
The happy couple were getting up to dance the first waltz together. Evan tilted back his champagne, downing it in a long swallow that made his nose burn. Traditional claptrap, this had to be the groom’s doing. Chloe was a free spirit.
A hand slid over Evan’s forearm and he turned to see an attractive brunette in a red dress. “I’m Valerie,” the woman said. “Would you like to dance?”
Evan started to decline—he wasn’t fit company for anyone tonight. Then he glanced toward the dance floor again and set his glass on the nearest table. “It would be my pleasure.”
He remembered to smile at his partner and tried to reply to her small talk, but his gaze kept drifting to Chloe. Her face, with its fine bones and eyes the color of the summer sky at twilight, was more memorable than beautiful. Although she was small, she held her back straight and her head fiercely upright. Her steps were deliberate and graceful. Her eyes were puffy, however, as if she’d been crying.
Two dances later, Evan thanked Valerie and turned to face Chloe. With a self-mocking smile and a stiff bow, he said, “My best wishes to the happy couple.”
“You weren’t invited…” the big man began.
“Oh, but I was,” Evan said, his voice grating slightly with the effort of being civil. “Chloe sent me a letter.”
“Daniel,” Chloe said, holding his arm. “This is Evan.”
“Who cares?” Daniel growled.
“I don’t expect you to,” Evan replied evenly. Then he turned to Chloe and asked, “May I have this dance?”
Daniel glared at him and touched Chloe on the elbow, a gesture that was both possessive and protective. “Don’t.”
“It’s okay, Daniel,” Chloe said, taking a deep breath as if to calm herself. “I’ll see you back at the table.”
By sheer coincidence, the next song was a ballad that Evan and Chloe had first heard together. Evan drew her into his arms and pressed his lips against her temple, not caring who saw them or what anyone thought.
“Evan, don’t,” she said, resisting his embrace.
“Chloe, love,” he murmured. “What have you done?”
She leaned away from him to search his face. “I thought you weren’t going to come.” Her voice broke. “You came too late.”
There was no point now in hurting her. Evan had watched the entire ceremony, including the part where the minister had asked if there was any reason why Chloe and Daniel shouldn’t be joined together. The impulse to speak had been there, but only fleetingly. Evan had told her before he’d left for Sudan that he’d be back when his stint was up—and probably that would have been true. But they’d known each other a mere six weeks and he was only twenty-eight; he had a whole world to explore before he settled down.
“I’ll regret that for the rest of my life.” He cupped her chin with his long fingers and lifted it so he could search her eyes. “Is the baby mine?”
“I’m not sure,” she said, her gaze sliding sideways.
A surge of irrational anger ran through him. “You got over me awfully quickly.”
“I wrote to you twice,” she shot back. “You didn’t answer.”
“It’s not a sedate suburban clinic over there,” he said tersely. “People are dying by the thousands.”
They continued to dance in silence for a few minutes, tense at first but then gradually she relaxed and let him draw her closer. “Is hubby taking you on a honeymoon to some romantic destination?”
“We’re not going anywhere,” she told him. “Daniel has to work.”
Evan raised their joined hands to brush his lips across her knuckles. “My return flight isn’t until the end of the week. While hubby’s away, Chloe could play.”
Her gaze locked with his and heat rose between them. For two cents he’d drag her out of this hall and say to hell with her husband, to hell with Sudan.
“I’m married,” she whispered. “Daniel’s a good man. I can’t betray him.”
Evan felt a sharp stab of pain over what he’d lost. He almost felt as if he’d been betrayed. He’d been careless with women’s feelings before, but no one had ever mattered to him the way Chloe did. Until this moment he hadn’t even realized how strong his feelings were for her. “Paul Bunyan over there might be your lawful husband,” he said, “but you’ll always belong to me.”
“Oh, Evan, this is such a mess.” She sighed. “I love you, but I can’t…” Her voice trailed off.
“You could if you wanted to.” At that, her mouth pressed into a thin, stubborn line, and Evan knew he wasn’t going to get his own way tonight. To his dismay, his voice shook as he asked, “Before I go may I kiss the bride?”
She nodded and he lowered his mouth to hers in a brief kiss that was achingly sweet and salted by tears. Evan cradled Chloe in his arms, lost in emotion and not knowing how he’d gotten that way.
A large hand grasped his arm, pulling Evan back. Damn, it was the glowering lumberjack. Evan cast a last glance at Chloe, and then released her. “She’s all yours, mate,” he said roughly to Daniel. “For now.”
Chapter 2
Bubbles streamed from the mouthpiece of Daniel’s regulator and cold water seeped into his wet suit. After an awkward duck dive he hauled himself hand over hand down the rocky underwater slope. Evan descended in an effortless glide, with an occasional casual flip of his fins. The bastard made it look so easy.
The sound of his own rasping breath and thudding heart filled Daniel’s silent world. Then, as he went deeper and the pressure increased, he gained speed. Starfish and anemones slid past, barely noticed. Twenty feet, thirty feet…With too many weights on his belt, he was going too fast. He banged his knee on a rocky outcropping. The underwater flashlight strapped to his calf clanked against rocks.
Daniel fumbled for the hose of his buoyancy compensator and spurted compressed air into the vest, slowing his descent. Relief flooded his veins and he realized he was sweating despite the cold.
At the base of the slope, hovering in a cloud of sediment that rose up from the soft ocean floor, Evan waited patiently, his upturned face pale inside his mask. Anger surged through Daniel at the thought he’d allowed himself to be goaded into this expedition; had allowed this man access to his family. Daniel should be pummeling the brilliant Dr. Cutler, not trying to prove he was the man’s equal.
At the bottom Daniel was still breathing heavily, and he consciously tried to slow his oxygen intake. Eyebrows raised, Evan put his thumb and forefinger together in the universal sign, waiting for Daniel’s answer to the question of whether everything was okay.
Everything was not okay. His wife was in love with this man and she was probably, right this minute, planning to go away with him. Daniel formed his fingers into a circle in response. Okay.
Inside, he seethed.
Chloe unbuttoned her blouse and pushed aside her nursing bra. Six-month-old Brianna latched eagerly on to the exposed nipple and started to suck. Her sturdy little legs in their pink sleeper pushed against the arm of the chair and a tiny hand clutched at Chloe’s breast.
Outside, cold November rain was falling for the fifth day in a row, making Chloe feel like a prisoner in her own home. The rental house was small and shabby, the living room dim even in midafternoon. It was all so dreary!
Chloe stroked her daughter’s downy cheek and peace settled over her, wrapping the two of them in a cocoon. Now and then Brianna stopped sucking, making small gusty sighs that caused Chloe to smile. Any hardship, any sorrow, was endurable for Brianna’s sake but, oh, she missed the modern light-filled apartment overlooking the water that she’d lived in before she was married.
She’d just switched the baby to her other breast when she heard Daniel’s truck pull into the gravel driveway at the side of the house. The back door opened and his boots clunked heavily on the rubber mat just inside.
Daniel padded through the living room on his way to the bedroom. Noticing Chloe, he stopped. “Why are you sitting in the dark?” he asked, flipping on the lamp.
Chloe blinked against the light. “You’re home early.”
“Can’t work in this rain.” Beads of water glistened in his black hair, which was messy from being pushed out of his eyes. “We’re raising the roof trusses and it’s too dangerous, even with scaffolding.”
He bent to kiss the top of her head. Chloe glanced up and saw his gaze on her bare breast, and she tried, without appearing obvious, to cover herself.
Daniel pretended not to notice and gently touched the back of Brianna’s hand with a fingertip. The baby stopped sucking to smile at him. “Do you want some tea?” he asked Chloe, keeping his eyes averted.
“Yes, please,” she responded, feeling contrite and resentful at the same time. His love made her feel guilty, because she didn’t reciprocate it. They’d both known what they were getting into when they’d decided to marry, but somehow the reality had turned out to be different from the theory.
Daniel put on the kettle, then took Brianna away to change her diaper. Chloe pulled her clothing back together and went out to the kitchen to finish making the tea. As she rinsed out the teapot in the chipped enamel sink, she felt the floorboard sag beneath her feet and looked down to see water seeping between the worn green linoleum and the baseboard.
“Daniel,” she called. “We’ve got a problem!”
He appeared in the doorway with Brianna in his arms and watched Chloe bounce up and down on the soggy boards. “This place is a piece of crap,” he said, disgusted. “We can’t have Brianna crawling around in here.”
“This wouldn’t be happening, if we’d stayed in my apartment,” Chloe couldn’t help but say.
“We couldn’t afford your apartment—as I explained when we went over our budget,” Daniel replied patiently. “Here, we’ll have a backyard for Brianna to play in next summer.”
Chloe sighed as she dropped tea bags into the pot and poured boiling water over top. She supposed Daniel was right, but next summer seemed a million years away. “I’ll call the landlord. If we’re lucky he’ll get someone in before the weekend.”
“Don’t bother,” Daniel said, getting an arrowroot cookie out of the tin for Brianna. “I’ll fix it myself and ask for a reduction in rent.”
Chloe’s eyebrows rose. She still wasn’t used to being with a man who could not only build a house from the ground up but who could fix anything that was broken. She poured the tea, and then carried steaming mugs into the living room.
Daniel was sitting on the floor with Brianna. After a moment’s hesitation, Chloe lowered herself to the carpet to join them, tucking in one leg in and stretching out the other. Brianna sat between Chloe and Daniel, slightly wobbly but holding herself up. Chloe handed her a squeaky toy and the little girl pressed on the plastic dog with both hands, trying to make it squeak.
Daniel sipped his tea. “What did you do today?”