A play for 4 people. Comedy. Gadgets

Scene 1. The end of patience

Equipped family apartment. Vitalik is sitting on a chair in the middle of the room, wearing headphones, with a smart watch on his arm. The phone is buzzing, dripping on the nerves of his parents.

Vitalik (disgustingly, viciously, tearfully). Verniiiiiiiiiite telefoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo…

pauses.

Vitalik (disgustingly, viciously, tearfully). Well, give aaaaaaaaaaaaaayte the phone!

In response, silence.

Vitalik (disgustingly, viciously, tearfully). This is a moooooo phone, you have no right to take it away from me!

In response, silence.

Vitalik (busily, impudently, blackmailing). I will call the police, tell them that my family is being mistreated, they will punish you! You will be imprisoned!

The heavy tread of his father's footsteps is heard, Vitalik takes off from his place and runs away. He stands behind the glass, locked in the bathroom.

An enraged father enters the room with a belt in his hand.

A worried mother minces behind him.

Alla (worried, calming her husband). Seryozha, please, just calm down. I'm begging you, control yourself.

Sergey (nervously, on edge). I'll call him, I'll call his ass right now. (He shouts to his son through the glass of the door.) Have I ever touched you with a finger in my whole life? Come out, parasite, we will change the algorithms of education. Words and beliefs are no good. Only rudeness and impunity in response!

Alla (worried, calming her husband). Seryozha, please, let's not get nervous.

Sergey (nervously, on edge, to his wife). What, without nerves? Now there is no way without nerves! Still exhausted, our beloved son, our little blood. All the attention, care, affection and forgiveness to him, so the blackmailer grew up. He will call. (Shouts to her son behind the glass.) Come on, call! I'll even return your phone to you in this case and tell you the number. Call-call! Tell me that they're bullying you, that you're having a bad life. They'll take you away in no time, just not my mother and me, but you. You from us! And they will be assigned to an orphanage. And if you think that there you will have: smartphones, tablets, computers, care, attention, help, support, delicious food and fashionable clothes, then you are very much mistaken, my dear! You'll have punches, punches, punches and more punches there. And from the curators and from fellow soldiers. They'll put your head in place there at once and the honours will evaporate in no time. Only now, my dear, there will be no way back home later.

The father moves away from the door, throws the belt nervously aside, Alla immediately picks up the belt and cautiously looking around, takes it to a safe place, away from sin.

Sergey (nervously, pacing the room). He will call… The treatment to him, you see, is cruel. You at least. (He shouts to his son.) Do you even know what abuse is? Have you ever come close to him? You couldn't even see him in the movies, you're still sitting in your anime, brodilki, and shooting games. Completely distanced from the real world. Do you even know what year it is, son? What country do you live in, what time of year is it now?

Was the last time you looked at food with your eyes? Still, you drag it into your mouth without looking! After all, you live entirely and completely in your smartphone, yet the attention is there. (Takes a breath.) We eat with a smartphone, we dress with a smartphone, we go to school with a smartphone in hand, what you look at on the road is unclear. In the classroom, and the fact that you don't clean your smartphone, teachers complain. We write all the tasks with GDZ, we find all the answers on the Internet. And if they turn off the Internet, how will you live? You're not capable of anything without a smartphone anymore! Have we taught you a single skill all your life – poking at the monitor with your finger? (He takes a breather and continues again, all that is painful, with renewed vigor.) You don't need anything in life, just smartphones, other devices, and gadgets on your mind! Yes, he also decided to frighten his parents with the police! (Tired, doomed.) Gadgets – gadgets… (Turning to his son behind the glass.) What a bastard you are, son! The bastard is!

Alla is coming back. She's between two fires. And I feel sorry for my son and my husband seems to be right.

Sergey (wearily, philosophically, to his wife). Although …, you know, Alla, perhaps, that the bastard, in this situation, is no longer even our son, you and I are bastards …, since we allowed such dependence. Not saved.

Alla (hesitantly). Seryozha, well, really. We don't have him that much…

Sergey (interrupts nervously). So much, Alla! So much! (Making a face, parading the softness of his wife.) Vitalik, here's a smartphone of the latest model for you. Here's Vitalenka unlimited Internet for you. Here's some money for you, my son, to upgrade the players' weapons. Streams, donations… Soon the child will not be lost in the illusory world, he will soon forget how to speak a normal human language! And he'll teach you and me at the same time!

Alla (indecisively protesting). Well, really…

Sergey (nervously). So much for you! (Sighing.) There was a normal kid. He could saw and plan. He built huts, drove football. With the girls, with the boys, they came up with their own games, talked, hung out, interacted! As soon as this damned smartphone appeared – that's it! Everything in life was not necessary at once! What kind of an attack is this. Who invented this dibilizing agent!

Alla herself is watching something on her smartphone at this time. She smiles, distracted by the message that came to her, but when she hears her husband's words, she gets distracted, agrees, removes the phone.

Sergey (wearily, to his wife). No, Alla, you can't do that anymore! Where is this good for? The further it goes, the worse and worse it gets. We urgently need to take some measures. The most drastic measures! (He shouts to his son behind the glass.) No phone! That's it! Punished!

Vitalik's mournful roar is heard behind the glass.

Sergey (shouts sternly to his son behind the glass). For a month!

Vitalik's roar is getting stronger.

Sergey (shouts sternly to his son behind the glass). And no digital television, and no computers!

Vitalik roars behind the glass with a new round of joyless emotions.

Sergey (shouts sternly to his son behind the glass). I'm taking your tablet too!

Vitalik roars as loudly and hysterically as possible, stomps his feet, twitches.

Sergey (calming down a little, but still on edge, to his son). A month is your deadline for correction! And then we'll see …

the musical accompaniment is not the most joyful motives.

Alla, pressing her ears with her hands, leaves the room.

Vitalik makes sad sobs from behind the bathroom door, and Sergey leaves at this time.

Returns with a smartphone, tablet, computer cord, and TV cord. He hides everything in the apartment, looks at his work with a satisfied, appreciative grin, and leaves.

The music is replaced by more positive rhythms. Vitalik opens the bathroom door, looks out of it cautiously, looks to see if there is an angry father nearby. The way is open.

Vitalik starts looking for his technical devices. Walks through the rooms, looking for. Gradually finds the cord from the TV and from the computer, rejoices at this find. Then he finds the tablet, and then the phone. Joyful leaves with trophies.

The music stops and ends.

ZTM.

Scene 2. You can't take us so easily

Alla is busy with the housework. He runs around with a plate in his hand, which he wipes with a towel, looks at where something is wrong. Between cases, he corrects, cleans. Hosts.

Alla (shouts). Vitalik, son? Do the cleaning while I do the dishes. Or wash the dishes, I'll do the cleaning while.

There is no answer.

Alla continues to host, thinks something, remembers, hurriedly leaves the room.

He returns with a broom and a dustpan in his hand, already without a plate and a towel.

Alla (shouts). Vitalik, where are you there?

There is no answer.

Alla continues to host, thinks something, remembers, hurriedly leaves the room.

He returns with a stack of clean plates, puts them in the place reserved for plates. He takes up a broom, starts sweeping.

Alla (shouts more nervously). Vitaaaala, where are you? Go wash the sink and the bathroom. I've already done the cleaning myself!

There is no answer.

Alla continues to do the cleaning, sweeps, collects garbage in a dustpan, takes it all away.

He returns in rubber gloves, with a cleaning agent and a washing sponge in his hand.

Alla (shouts barely restraining herself). Vitalik, is it a long wait for you?

Vitalik's voice (a disgruntled exclamation from the other room). Well, what?

Alla (shouts barely restraining herself). Go take out the trash at least, I've almost done my own housework here.

Alla enters the bathroom, closes the door behind her. Cleans, washes, wipes. Her movements stand out in silhouette against the background of almost transparent glass.

Slowly, paying no attention to anyone or anything, Vitalik comes out. He has a smartphone in his hand, he is completely absorbed in the game. All attention is on the smartphone, does not even look at his feet.

Passes to the first available sitting place. Huddles without looking, just without looking up from the smartphone.

Vitalik (nervously, to himself, without distracting himself from the game). Damn it! (He pauses, plays, looks at his smartphone.) Where are you going! No-no-no-no-no!!! aaaa. Damn! (He waves his hands furiously, pauses, plays, looks at his smartphone.) What kind of person else? Riley is some kind of prank. Yes, stop, yes, well, no, no, no, no… And damn, they leaked it. (He waves his hands furiously, pauses, plays, looks at his smartphone.) Yes, what's going on, well… (Nervously, freaking out shakes his smartphone.) Come on, don't be stupid!

A tortured mother comes out of the bathroom. He takes off his gloves, wipes the sweat from his forehead, sighs, looks displeased at his son.

Alla (wearily, sadly). M… found it, then.

Vitalik (quite, without looking up from the game). Aha…

Alla (wearily, sadly). Did you take out the trash?

Vitalik (quite, without looking up from the game, without joining in the conversation). Aghaaa…

Alla (doubtfully, raising her tone). Did you take it out?

Vitalik breaks away from his smartphone for the first time.

Vitalik (in prostration). Eh? What?

Alla (displeased, restrained). Did you take out the trash, for the third time I ask?

Vitalik (sincerely). Garbage? Did you ask?

Alla (restraining herself with difficulty). You know, I'm sick of it. Why do I have to say the same thing ten times? You can't hear anything at all while you're holding this thing. Give me the phone!

Vitalik (indignantly). I just said that I repeated it three times, you're already saying ten! As you want, you turn it over, and I'm the last one. I'll take out the garbage now, I won't give you the phone!

Alla (shouts nervously). I took out the garbage on the run!

Music.

Vitalik casually (lightly) throws the phone next to him, he is all dissatisfied and heavily sighing goes to throw out the garbage.

Alla, taking advantage of the moment, grabs her son's smartphone and hides it not where his father hid it, but in another place. He's leaving.

Vitalik returns with an empty bucket in his hand.

Vitalik (displeased). I took it out! Everything? Are you happy?

He goes to the place where he left the phone, but the phone is not there, he is indignant.

Vitalik (shouts nervously to his mother). Where's my phone, uh?

Alla's voice (shouting from the other room). I cleaned it up! Take a break from the phone for now. Indeed, you are greyhound by leaps and bounds!

Vitalik (shouts nervously to his mother). What's up? I took out the trash, I did everything! I got my phone back!

Alla's voice (shouting from the other room). If you start behaving normally, I will return it!

Vitalik (shouts nervously to his mother). I'm already behaving normally!

Alla's voice (shouting from the other room). This is not normal!

Vitalik (shouts nervously to his mother). It's fine!

Alla's voice (shouting from the other room). No!

Vitalik (shouts nervously to his mother). Yes!

Alla's voice (shouting from another room). No!

Music.

Vitalik starts looking for his smartphone. At first he looks in where his father hid, but there is no phone there. Searches in other places. Eventually finds it. He leaves contentedly with a smartphone in his hand.

After a while, Alla hurriedly runs out, with the same smartphone, hides it in another place, runs away.

A disgruntled Vitalik comes out. Looking for a smartphone again. Not immediately, but he finds it. He leaves, sighing skeptically.

After a while, Alla hurriedly runs out, with the same smartphone, hides it in the third place, runs away.

Again, after a while, Vitalik comes out already in a traditionally sad mood, looking for him again. Opens all the old "nooks", does not find, gets angry, rushes. With difficulty, but still finds his smartphone.

Enter Alla.

The music ends.

Alla (disappointed). Found it again!

Vitalik (hiding the smartphone behind his back). Found. You give it to me… stop playing hide-and-seek with me already.

Alla (disappointed, tired). What else can I do with you?

Vitalik (hiding the smartphone behind his back). You don't have to do anything with me. You need to get behind me, that's all.

Vitalik pulls out the phone from behind his back, continues to play in it.

Alla (displeased, insistent). No, my dear, it won't work that way. If you don't want to play hide–and-seek, let's negotiate!

Vitalik (looking at the phone with displeasure). About what?

Alla (insistently). You're already big…

Vitalik (a little boorish, looking at the phone). And?

Alla (insistently). Control yourself somehow.

Vitalik (rudely, looking at the phone). For example?

Alla (insistently). Set aside an hour of time for all your messengers, videos and toys. And the rest of the time, do something useful. There is always something to do around the house. And besides homework, there are things to do, only you don't notice them or simply ignore them. What you don't ask for, there is no answer for everything. Whatever you say, it's all past the ears.

Vitalik (looking up from the phone, indignantly). What hour per day? What are you talking about? What will I do in this hour?

Alla (insistently). How much do you need?

Vitalik (with knowledge of the case). About ten or thirteen hours.

Alla (insistently). No, it's too much. I give you two hours for everything about everything!

Vitalik (indignantly). I can't do anything in two hours!

Alla (insistently). So, learn to keep up! If you don't learn, I'll tell my father, let him decide what to do with you!

Vitalik (offended). Got…

a short musical motif.

Vitalik goes one way, Alla goes the other way. Both are on edge.

The music stops and ends.

ZTM.

Scene 3. Little Tricks

Sergey is returning from work. Puts the bag down.

Sergey (not very loudly). Honey, I'm home!

Sergei goes to change clothes.

Sleepy Alla comes out, stretches.

Sergei returns to the room, he calls on the move, he is already dressed in homemade clothes.

Hugging his wife.

Alla (apologetically). Seryozha, I got a little sleepy, I didn't hear the alarm clock. I didn't have time to cook breakfast for you. Be patient for ten minutes, okay, I'll quickly figure something out in a hurry.

Alla rushes into the kitchen, but Sergey catches her by the hand, stops her.

Sergey (with warmth). Don't fuss, I don't want to eat. Most of what I took with me to the night room, I ate in the morning. I'd better get some rest.

He takes a couple of steps towards the bedroom, but turns around.

Sergey (with interest). How is it at home? Is everything okay? Do you live amicably with your son?

Alla (wearily). Yes, whatever… After all, he declassified all the caches, a kind of parasite. I then hid it myself, one result – everything finds.

Sergey (seriously, dissatisfied). Well, that is, continues to degrade with this devilish lure in his hands?

Alla (shrugs uncertainly). It seems to have come to a consensus, agreed.

Sergey (skeptically). About what?

Alla (without much confidence). He said he would control himself. He will devote time to household chores and use the phone only to a limited extent.

Sergey (skeptically). Did he just say that?

Alla (without much confidence). Well… We sort of agreed with him.

Sergey shakes his head skeptically, squints his eye.

Sergey (skeptically). I see…

Alla looks away, she herself understands that all these agreements with her son are unlikely to have any effect.

Sergei approaches the sofa where his son is sleeping. He is covered with a blanket over his head.

Sergey pulls off the blanket, and sees that Vitalik is lying with a smartphone in his hands, playing.

Vitalik looks fearfully at his parents, especially at his father.

Sergey (skeptically). Self-control, as I see, is in full swing!