The Friends We Keep

Chapter Five

Nicole felt like the White Rabbit as she kept chanting, “I’m late, I’m late.” She didn’t add the “for a very important date” part, but she felt it. She could hear the tick, tick, ticking in her head as she circled the parking lot, looking for a spot.

The lot was packed. Had every family in Mischief Bay conspired to take advantage of the beautiful beach weather?

“Finally!”

She saw a spot at the very end and goosed the engine to claim it before someone else did. Then she jumped out of her SUV, grabbed her tote, slammed the door and hit the lock button on the key fob before dashing toward the park.

She wanted to say it wasn’t her fault. Her class at the senior center had gone long because she’d been having a good time. There was something so sweet and life-affirming about watching a bunch of seniors dancing together. Especially the couples who had been married sixty and seventy years. Their bones might be frail, but their love was strong. She’d gotten caught up in the lesson and watching them and had totally forgotten that she had to be at the park to collect Jairus Sterenberg and bring him to Tyler’s camp.

A psychologist would probably have a field day with her convenient memory lapse. He or she might point out that there was something very passive-aggressive about the whole situation and later, Nicole promised herself, she would have a good, long think about it. But until then, she was going to simply run as fast as she could, considering she was wearing three-inch heels and a purple tango dress with a very short skirt.

The irony of her running to meet the author of Brad the Dragon did not escape her. Nor was she unamused by the fact that she was the parent liaison. Yes, Tyler had begged, but she knew it was more than that. Life had a sense of humor. She was constantly reminded of that fact. Which meant she was frantically searching for a town car—God forbid the man actually drive himself—and the man who would step out of it.

She spotted the black vehicle pull up to the curb and hurried toward it. The back door opened and a guy got out. Nicole slowed to a walk, then came to a stop altogether.

She waited, knowing someone else had to get out of the car. The guy standing there couldn’t possibly be the evil, nefarious money counter she knew he must be.

He was of average height—maybe five-ten or five-eleven—with dark hair and eyes, high cheekbones and sculpted jaw. His skin was a light café-au-lait color. He wasn’t traditionally handsome, but she had to admit she liked the look of him. Adding to the appeal were broad shoulders and narrow hips.

She blinked, not sure which surprised her more. The sexy package or the lack of black cape and horns.

No, she told herself. This was the manager. He’d come to explain why jerk-off couldn’t make it. He had to be.

She walked over. “Mr. Sterenberg? I’m Nicole and I’m—”

He looked at her, blinked twice, then held up his hands in the shape of a T. “Crap. No way. I can’t believe it. They sent you? Here? Now?”

WTF? Nicole’s warm, fuzzy, girlie feelings faded as quickly as they’d appeared. “Excuse me?”

“Look, this is really bad timing. I’m sure you’re terrific and all.” He glanced away, then returned his attention to her. He actually took a step back. “My friends are great. Assholes, but great. I can’t figure out if this is a joke or what but I’ll take it up with them later. But I have a thing I need to get to.”

He pulled his wallet out of his back pocket. “I can pay you. You want the money, right? Or if they paid you already, I’ll tip you, but you have to go away.”

Words all spoken in English, yet they made absolutely no sense to her. Nada. What on earth was he—

“Oh my God, you think I’m a hooker?”

He stared at her, his eyes widening. Several twenties dangled from his fingers. “You’re not?”

“No. I’m the mom sent to escort you to the event back at the camp.”

His mouth moved, but no words came out. “Y-you can’t be. Look at how you’re dressed. This is not my fault. I saw a couple of my buddies over the weekend. I was bitching, ah, complaining about a long dry spell. They joked about fixing me up with someone. When I saw you—” He waved his hand up and down in front of her. “Look at how you’re dressed. This is not my fault.”

“You already said that.” Nicole raised her chin and squared her shoulders. “I was substitute teaching dance at a senior center,” she told him, using the haughtiest tone she could muster. “Helping a friend who’s on vacation with her family. She likes to dress in a costume because it helps. Today was tango day.”

His gaze dropped to the fairly spectacular amount of cleavage she was showing. No way she was going to tell him that it was mostly fake. Her somewhat meager assets were being pushed up by the wardrobe equivalent of chicken cutlets.

“Costume?” The word came out as a yelp.

“Costume,” she repeated slowly. “Do you know how insulting this is? I have a six-year-old son who worships you.” She dismissed him with a flick of her wrist. “Okay, not you but Brad the Dragon. He wrote and rewrote his essay. He didn’t play, barely ate. Because of your books. Do you know how many forms your stupid contest requires? I filled out every one of them. I took time off work to be here. I left senior citizens to be here and you think I’m a hooker?”

“I’m so sorry.”

“Like I believe that. I knew you’d be a jerk, but I never expected...” She sucked in a breath. “Fine. Let me show you where you’re supposed to go.” If only it were hell, she thought grimly. She would love to show him that.

“And you’d better be nice to the kids. All of them. Especially mine.”

“You’re mad.”

She started walking toward the camp area of the park. “Wow. A rocket scientist. You’re wasting yourself on kids’ books.”

He kept up with her easily, but then he wasn’t wearing heels. “It was an honest mistake.”

“Prostitution is illegal. I’m not even dressed that sexy. It wasn’t honest. It was sick. What kind of a man assumes a woman is a hooker?” She swung around to face him. “It’s one o’clock in the afternoon. In a park. Did you think I was just going to blow you in your car?”

He shifted uncomfortably. “I didn’t think that part through. And, no, I don’t assume every woman is a hooker.”

“Just me?”

He winced. “I’m sorry. Really sorry. But you have to admit, you’re dressed provocatively.”

“No, I don’t.” She glared at him. “You’re saying I look like a slut?”

“I’m saying you’re all that.”

Under any other circumstances, she would have found him interesting. And maybe charming. But not like this. Not when he was that hideous author. She started walking again.

He slipped the money back in his wallet. “I’m sorry,” he repeated.

“You should be.”

“You really don’t like me.”

She barely glanced at him.

They went along the tree-lined path, toward the main camp building. Normally the kids were outside, but for this event, they were kept contained.

“Why did you assume I would be a jerk?” he asked.

“We are not having this conversation. I’m taking you where you need to go and nothing more. No. Wait. I’ll be taking pictures of you with Tyler and you will pretend this is the best time of your life.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“This is really important to him.”

“I got that.”

They reached the main camp building. She opened the side door before he could and stomped inside, then pointed. “Room five. Act happy. I’ve got mace in my bag.”

Jairus nodded once and reached for the door handle. He turned back to her, but she only continued to glower and point. When he went inside, she crept close and watched through the window.

The kids screamed loud enough to shake the building. She spotted Tyler standing in front of everyone, his eyes wide, his whole body shaking with excitement. Jairus approached him and said something she couldn’t hear. Tyler nodded. Jairus held out his hand. Tyler flung his arms around the man and Jairus hugged him back before glancing over his shoulder to where Nicole was watching.

“I got this,” he mouthed.

She turned away and hurried to the bathroom. Once there, she checked out her reflection even as she was peeling off layers.

Okay, so the makeup was a little heavy for the middle of the day. And yes, the dress was kind of tacky-sexy. But she’d been teaching tango.

“A hooker,” she muttered as she stepped out of her dress. She slipped on shorts and a T-shirt, then traded in heels for flip-flops. “Talk about a jerk. I knew it. I just knew it. That internet article about him was exactly right.”

Too bad he was so appealing. That was just wasted. God should have given Jairus more ugly. The man deserved it.

She had makeup wipes tucked in a side pocket of her tote. She used them to remove her tango-centric eye and face makeup. It only took a second to brush out her hair and secure it in a simple ponytail.

Now she looked like what she was. A mom. She supposed it was her own fault for being late. If she’d gotten to the park ten minutes earlier, this never would have happened. Not that Jairus wasn’t still going to have to pay.

She came out of the bathroom to find the party moving outside. The counselors had set up several tables with balloons and goody bags, along with a big cake. All part of the prize package. Not only were the kids being given a special afternoon with Jairus, they were taking home an advance copy of his next book. Oh, joy. She knew what she and Tyler would be reading before, during and after dinner. For weeks. Damn Jairus and his ridiculous creation.

Tyler ran up to her. “He’s here!”

“I know. I met him.”

“He’s nice and funny and he told me secrets about Brad.”

“No way.”

Tyler nodded earnestly.

She dropped to her knees and took her son’s hands in hers. “I’m so proud of you. You worked hard to make this happen. You and your friends are having a great day and it’s because of you.”

He hugged her. “This is the best day ever, Mommy. You helped, too.”

“I know, but you’re the one who believed. I love you, big guy.”

“I love you, too.”

Tyler ran back to where Jairus was sitting on the grass talking to the kids and answering their endless questions about Brad and why things had turned out the way they had in his various stories. He seemed to be genuinely enjoying the kids. When it was time for the cake to be cut, he did that himself and served it to all the kids and counselors.

Nicole wanted to say it was because she’d frightened him, but she had a feeling his actions had nothing to do with her. He was too easy with the children. Too comfortable. He must do these parties a lot, she thought, wondering if they were part of his deal with his publisher, or if he chose to interact with his littlest fans.

The afternoon wore on. She kept to the fringes of the event, watching but not getting involved. This was Tyler’s moment. He reveled in the joy of being close to Jairus. The questions never let up, but the man took them in stride. Despite their disastrous meeting, Nicole had to admit Jairus was good at what he did.

Probably because he was so rested from counting all his money.

After about an hour, the goody bags were passed out. Jairus read the new book to everyone, then patiently signed every copy. Parents started arriving to pick up their kids. A few went over to meet him. He shook hands and posed for pictures.

One of the camp counselors walked over to join Nicole. “He’s so hot,” the twenty-year-old said with a sigh. “I tried to give him my number, but he wouldn’t take it.”

“You’re probably too wholesome,” Nicole muttered.

“What?”

“Nothing. Sorry. I was thinking of something else.”

“He’s been so great with the kids.”

“He has.”

She said the words reluctantly, but there was no denying the truth. Either Jairus truly liked children or he was the best actor on the planet. And as she refused to give him any credit for talent or ability, she was left with the uncomfortable fact that he seemed to really like children. And didn’t that suck?

She wanted him to be pure evil. Or just slimy. Except for the hooker thing, he’d done well.

As the campers left to go home, the crowd around Jairus shrank. Tyler lingered and Nicole didn’t hurry him, knowing this was important to him. They would leave when Jairus did. Tyler would want every second with his hero.

As she watched, Jairus said something to Tyler, then walked toward her.

“You look less hostile,” he said as he approached.

“I didn’t want to scare the kids.”

“You’re still mad.”

“No. I appreciate you did a good job here.” Man, that was hard to say.

“Thanks. I am sorry.”

She looked at him without speaking.

He shoved his hands into his jeans front pockets. “This is the part where you say it was pretty funny and no big deal.”

“That’s not going to happen.”

“Can I buy you a cup of coffee by way of an apology?”

His eyes were beautiful, she thought absently. He was obviously of mixed race—kind of a common thing in LA. She wondered about his heritage. A little something of everything, she would guess.

“Nicole?”

“What? No.” That sounded rude. “Um, no, thank you.”

“Can I get your number?”

She stared at him. “Why?”

He smiled. A sweet smile with just a hint of sexy. A smile that made her insides feel funny and her knees go just a little weak.

What? No! No way and no. She was not attracted to the evil, awful author of Brad the Dragon. She hated him. Hated. There was no way she was interested.

“To go out? I don’t know you and you have friends who send you hookers.”

“I only thought they did. There’s a difference.”

“Not much of one. The fact that you thought they did means they’re capable of it. Those are not people I want hanging around my son. You did good here today. That’s all I wanted. The rest of it doesn’t matter.”

“So that’s a no?”

“That’s a no.”

“You’re tempted, though. A little?”

“Don’t you have to be somewhere?”

“Not really. And you do know me. Through my work.”

She thought about the endless hours she’d spent reading his books aloud. “That doesn’t recommend you.”

He surprised her by chuckling. “Not a fan?”

“You have no idea.”

He leaned close. For a second she caught a scent of something woodsy and clean. Nice. “I get that from a lot of parents, but the kids love me and I love them.”

“Don’t try to be nice now.”

“I’m always nice.”

And highly verbal, she thought. “You’re a writer. I don’t like writers. Look, you really have to go.”

He studied her for a few seconds, then nodded. “It was nice to meet you, Nicole.”

While she was happy this was over, a teeny, tiny part of her was sorry he was giving up so easily. Was it a writer thing? Because Eric had sure given up on them. Not that her marriage could be compared with her five minutes with Jairus, but still.

He walked back over to Tyler. They talked for a few minutes, then hugged. Jairus whispered something to the boy before leaving.

Tyler held his new book tight. “This was the best day ever.”

Nicole brushed his hair out of his eyes. “I’m glad. He spent a lot of time with you.”

“I know. He said he had fun.”

“I’m sure he did. Want to get your stuff so we can go?”

Tyler nodded and ran back the room where he’d left his lunch bag. The camp counselor moved next to Nicole.

“He was asking about you.”

“Tyler?”

“No, Jairus. You know... Were you single? Did you have a boyfriend? I think he was interested.”

There was a distinct fluttering right below her rib cage. Nicole told herself it was because she’d missed lunch. She was hungry—nothing more.

“I hope you didn’t tell him anything.”

“Just where you worked.”

Nicole groaned. “Why?”

“Did you see his butt? Plus, he’s successful.”

“Nothing will come of it.”

“I don’t know. He seemed pretty interested to me.”

“You say that like it’s a good thing.”

“Are you kidding? He’s so sexy.”

“Not what I’m looking for.”

“Uh-huh. Keeping telling yourself that and maybe it will be true.”

Chapter Six

The waiting room was familiar. Hayley couldn’t guess how much time she and Rob had spent here. Talking. Hoping. There were also the appointments she’d had on her own. While it would never be a second home—no one would want that—it was familiar. Sometimes the news was good and sometimes it wasn’t. She’d cried here, hoped here.

She knew every painting on the walls. All landscapes. There were no pictures of families in this waiting room, no children. That would be too hard. The magazines were related to travel or cooking or sports. No smiling babies on parenting magazines.

Appointments tended to last a long time so it was rare to run into another couple. The process of having a baby when science had to get involved wasn’t easy.

Rob sat next to her, his left ankle rested on his right knee. His foot bounced as he stared unseeingly at the magazine he’d opened. She might be the one going through the procedures, but he’d always disliked Dr. Pearce’s office. Or maybe he disliked the reason they had to be here.

For the past four years, this place had defined their life. She’d been referred after her second miscarriage. There had been tests and discussions. It wasn’t that she couldn’t get pregnant, it was that she couldn’t stay pregnant. Her body rejected the fetus and while there were many explanations, there didn’t seem to be any solutions.

“It’s okay,” she told Rob. “You can relax.”

“Not here.”

She took his hand in hers. “We’re going to have a good appointment. I can feel it.”

He looked doubtful, but didn’t say anything. Alice, one of the nurses, called them into Dr. Pearce’s office.

“How are you feeling?” the nurse asked as they walked down the hall.

“Good. Taking my iron every day.”

She had to. She’d lost so much blood with her last miscarriage. She was also bleeding on and off. If it were Halloween, she could easily do the vampire thing and be plenty pale without makeup. The thought made her smile, but she doubted Rob would appreciate the humor.

Dr. Pearce was already waiting for them. She was tall and in her early forties, with short red hair and a lot of freckles. She looked like what she was—a sensible, compassionate woman. Hayley had liked her from the start. She kept current on the latest infertility research and was willing to discuss unconventional therapies.

Dr. Pearce shook Rob’s hand, then hugged Hayley.

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

“Good. Strong.”

Dr. Pearce raised her eyebrows. “You don’t look strong, Hayley.”

“Okay, I’m better than I was. I’m eating right and taking my vitamins.”

“Good. Your body has been through a lot. It needs time to recover.”

Time was not Hayley’s friend. She knew that fertility started a steep downhill slide and with no information on her family’s medical history, she didn’t know if she came from a long line of fertile women or those who had gone into perimenopause at thirty-five.

She and Rob sat in the comfortable visitor chairs. Dr. Pearce slipped on reading glasses, then typed on her computer.

“We have your blood work from your last visit. It’s better than it was.”

Hayley pulled some papers out of her handbag. “Good, because I want to talk to you about this.” She passed over the sheets. “They’re doing great work in Switzerland. The clinic has had incredible success with women having trouble carrying to term. There’s a new drug therapy and special monitoring. It’s expensive, but we’ll find a way. We always do.”

She spoke quickly, careful to keep her attention on the doctor. Next to her, Rob stiffened. She knew why—this was the first he’d heard of the clinic in Switzerland. She hadn’t mentioned it because she didn’t want to hear all the reasons why it wasn’t a good idea. Rob didn’t get it. He thought they’d done enough. Been through enough. He wanted to give it a rest. Or adopt. No matter how much she explained neither option was possible, he didn’t want to listen.

Dr. Pearce ignored the material and took off her glasses. She looked between Hayley and Rob, then drew in a breath.

“No,” she said quietly. “I can’t recommend you, Hayley. The reason I wanted to meet with you today is because you’ve reached your limit. Your body simply can’t handle this anymore. The last bleeding episode was the worst, by far. I’m concerned about your health.”

“No. I’m fine. I feel great.” An exaggeration, but she did feel better.

“All the drugs and treatments have taken a toll,” Dr. Pearce continued. “I’m sorry. I know how badly you want to have a baby. There are other options that don’t include carrying a child to term.”

Hayley went cold. She couldn’t be hearing this right. “I have to,” she whispered. “We can’t use a surrogate.”

They’d tried, but her ovaries didn’t respond to the drugs. The attempt to harvest had failed.

“Hayley, listen to her,” Rob said, reaching for her hand. “That bleeding last time was scary. You can’t risk your health, your life. I don’t want you to die.”

She pulled her hand free and stared at the doctor. “I want to go to Switzerland. They’ll make it work. You’ll see.”

“That’s not an option. Not for you. Hayley, this is so hard to say and I know it’s going to be hard to hear. You need a hysterectomy. You’re at risk of bleeding. I’m afraid the next time it starts, we won’t be able to stop it.”

“No.” Hayley wanted to cover her ears. She wouldn’t hear this. Couldn’t. She wasn’t giving up. She was never giving up. There was an answer. There had to be. “No. You don’t understand. I have to have a baby. I have to.”

“Sweetie, don’t.” Rob reached for her again. He touched her arm. “It’s okay. We’ll get through this—”

She pushed him away and stood up. “A hysterectomy? No. I won’t.” That would be the end. She could never have a child of her own. Never have a family of her own. Something that was her. She needed that. Needed the connection, the belonging. Why couldn’t they understand? Why were they ganging up on her?

She turned to Rob. “Did you know about this? Did you talk to her?” She spun to the doctor. “Did you go behind my back?”

“No,” Dr. Pearce said quickly. “Of course not. Hayley, I know this is awful for you. I wish I could help you, but I can’t. Let me be clear. If you get pregnant again, you will bleed out and die. I strongly recommend you go to the hospital today for surgery, but I understand you have to think about this. Process it.”

“I want to go to Switzerland.” She had to focus on what was possible. Otherwise she couldn’t get through it.

Rob stood and faced her. “You’re not going anywhere,” he yelled. “You’re not getting pregnant. Let it go. Dammit, Hayley.” Tears filled his eyes. He shook his head, then walked out of the office.

Hayley stared after him, but didn’t follow. She sank back into her seat. “There has to be something,” she whispered. She was cold. Desperately cold. Her stomach churned.

Dr. Pearce came around the desk and took Rob’s seat. She reached for Hayley’s hand.