- -
- 100%
- +
‘Are you pregnant, Zoë?’
The question caught her off-guard. Her eyes flew to his face, but it was impossible to tell what he was thinking. He was deliberately masking his feelings, and the thought made her shiver—because the Ben she remembered would never have been so guarded around her; she would have known immediately how he was feeling.
She half rose, but Ben was too quick for her. He caught her hand. ‘I’m not letting you run away without answering my question. You’re having my baby, aren’t you, Zoë? Why else would you have come here to see me?’
Raising her head, she looked him in the eyes. ‘Yes, I’m pregnant.’
After a momentary pause, Ben gave her one of his trademark grins. ‘I may be shocked to learn that I’m about to become a father, but I’m pleased too. I’ve never made any secret of the fact that I want kids—although I rather hoped I’d have a wife before they came along…
Jennifer Taylor lives in the north-west of England, in a small village surrounded by some really beautiful countryside. She has written for several different Mills & Boon® series in the past, but it wasn’t until she read her first Medical™ Romance that she truly found her niche. She was so captivated by these heartwarming stories that she set out to write them herself!
When she’s not writing, or doing research for her latest book, Jennifer’s hobbies include reading, gardening, travel, and chatting to friends both on and off-line. She is always delighted to hear from readers, so do visit her website at www.jennifer-taylor.com
Recent titles by the same author:
THE GP’S MEANT-TO-BE BRIDE*
MARRYING THE RUNAWAY BRIDE*
THE SURGEON’S FATHERHOOD SURPRISE**
THEIR LITTLE CHRISTMAS MIRACLE
*Dalverston Weddings **Brides of Penhally Bay
Dear Reader
I always knew that the third book in my Dalverston Weddings series would be the most difficult to write. Not only did I feel a very special bond with Ben and Zoë, so wanted to do them justice, but I was aware that I was going to give them an extremely tough time.
When best man Ben Nicholls discovers that his ex- girlfriend Zoë Frost is to attend the wedding, he is stunned. He has spent the past two years trying to forget about her, yet as soon as he sees her again all the old feelings resurface. When Zoë agrees to spend one last night with him, Ben is certain that it will help him to draw a line under the past.
When Zoë tells Ben a few months later that he is to be a father, he is both shocked and elated. However, it isn’t the only thing that Zoë needs to tell him. There is something else—something that rocks his world. All Ben knows is that he intends to be there for Zoë and their baby, no matter what happens.
Helping Ben and Zoë deal with such life-changing issues was a challenge. I cried with them during the tough times and laughed with them during the good—it was a real emotional roller coaster. I hope you enjoy this book, and that you will feel at the end of it, as I did, that this couple truly deserve a lifetime of happiness together.
Best wishes
Jennifer
BY
JENNIFER TAYLOR
For The Wedding Party: Vicky and Jamie,
Kathy, Carl, Pauline, John, Nigel, Neil, Mark, Mel.
And last but never least, Bill.
Thank you all for an unforgettable day.
CHAPTER ONE
December
SHE shouldn’t have come. It was all very well thinking that she was ready to face Ben while there were hundreds of miles separating them, but now that she was here, she was no longer as confident. Could she really see Ben again, talk to him, and not allow her resolve to weaken?
Zoë Frost could feel her stomach churning with nerves as the taxi drew up outside the hotel. When she had received the invitation to Ross and Heather’s wedding, she had dismissed the idea of attending. After all, when she had left Dalverston two years ago, she had sworn she would never go back. Nevertheless, as the weeks had passed, bringing the day ever closer, she had felt increasingly torn.
There were very few people to whom she was close. It had been her decision not to form attachments, neither romantic ones nor those of friendship. In her experience people invariably let you down and it was easier to keep your distance. However, Ross and Heather had proved themselves to be true friends. They had always been there for her and had never taken offence when she had brushed them off, as she’d so frequently done in the past. How could she not attend their wedding given those facts? Maybe it would be hard to see Ben again, but she owed it to them to be there when they got married.
‘This is your hotel, miss.’
Zoë jumped when the taxi driver reminded her that he was waiting for her to alight. Hunting in her black leather bag, she drew out her purse and paid him, fumbling a little as she added a generous tip to the fare. She’d been living in Paris for the past two years and her brain hadn’t caught up with the change of currency on the short flight back to England.
A porter came out of the hotel to collect her luggage and she tipped him as well, smiling wryly as she realised how used she’d grown to dealing with such matters. The time she’d spent in Paris had changed her, smoothed away the rough edges. On the outside at least she was no longer the gauche, inexperienced girl from the care home, but a woman who had learned how to blend in with the highest levels of society. The thought was a welcome boost to her confidence.
Zoë checked in and went upstairs to her room. It was a beautiful room but then she had made a point of booking one with a view over the countryside. Although she loved Paris, she had missed all this, missed the space, the light, the majesty of the hills that towered over the town. Opening the window, she breathed deeply, letting the cold December air flow into her lungs. Coming back to Dalverston was like coming home, she thought, then quickly dismissed the idea. It was too dangerous to think like that, too emotive, and if there was one thing she needed more than anything today it was to keep control of her emotions. She wouldn’t be able to cope when she saw Ben if she didn’t.
Once again Zoë felt the stirring of doubt but she brushed it aside. Opening her case, she took out the chic honey-gold wool suit she had chosen to wear for the occasion. There was an ivory silk blouse to go with it plus a pair of wickedly high-heeled shoes that added several inches to her not-inconsiderable height. The outfit had cost a small fortune but it would be worth it if it helped her project the right image, that of a woman in control. How she felt inside was her business. She didn’t intend to let anyone know how nervous she felt. She shot a glance at the clock on the bedside table and felt her heart surge. In just under an hour’s time she would see Ben.
Ben parked his car in the hotel’s car park. Opening the door of the sleek little convertible, he eased his legs out from under the wheel, sighing when he saw the mud that was caked on the knees of his jeans. He really should have changed before he’d come here. Normally, he would have done so, but he wasn’t firing on all cylinders today and was it any wonder?
When he’d seen Zoë’s name on that guest list Ross had given him that morning, he’d had the devil of a job hiding his shock. He had never expected her to attend the wedding even though he knew that Heather and Ross were her closest friends. He had assumed that she would make some excuse, but obviously not. Why had she decided to come? he wondered. Was it just because she wanted to see her friends get married or was there another reason, one that had something to do with him?
Ben swore under his breath as he made his way into the hotel. Zoë had made her feelings perfectly clear two years ago and it was madness to imagine that she’d changed her mind. He wouldn’t want her to either. He’d learned a valuable lesson when she’d left him and he had no intention of placing himself in the position of having his heart trampled on a second time. Maybe he had believed in love once upon a time but he didn’t believe in it now. Zoë had cured him of that kind of misty-eyed thinking!
Walking over to the reception desk, Ben joined the queue and waited his turn to speak to the receptionist. There were a lot of people milling about and he guessed that most of them were wedding guests too. He sighed. A lot of folk were going to be upset by what had happened.
The lift bell pinged as the lift arrived at the ground floor and Ben automatically glanced round, then felt his breath catch when he saw the woman who alighted. Tall and slender, with her red-gold hair pulled smoothly back from her face, she drew many admiring glances. Ben knew that he was staring at her, but he couldn’t help it. She looked exactly the same in many ways and yet so very different in others.
He took rapid stock, trying to work out what had changed. There was no doubt that the honey-coloured suit she was wearing was expensive. The cut of the fabric hinted at expert tailoring of a type rarely seen in chain-store clothing. Her shoes—the sexiest pair of shoes he had ever seen with those wickedly high heels—also betrayed their pedigree, as did the matching bag that swung from her hand. She looked so cool, so poised, so sophisticated that Ben felt pain stab through his heart. Obviously, Zoë had lost no time encasing herself in yet another protective layer.
She was halfway across the foyer when she spotted him. Ben took a deep breath when he saw her stop and got a grip of himself. He had come here to break the news to her and the sooner he got it over with, the better. Stepping out of the queue, he headed towards her, fixing his most urbane smile into place as he drew closer. He may have loved Zoë once but that was all in the past. Their relationship was history now and he’d moved on…
Hadn’t he?
Ben clamped down on that thought as he greeted her. ‘Hello, Zoë. How are you? Although I doubt if I need to ask that when you’re looking so stunning.’
His tone was playful, the one he used whenever he was around any attractive woman. Most seemed to enjoy the hint of flirtatiousness in his voice, the suggestion that there might be something more to come, although Zoë obviously didn’t appreciate it.
‘I’m very well, thank you, Ben. How are you?’
Her deep grey eyes looked dispassionately back at him but Ben held his smile, determined not to let her see how discomfited he felt. ‘Great. Or as great as I can be in the circumstances.’
‘That sounds very cryptic.’ One elegant brow arched as she looked at him and Ben sighed. He was here to deliver a message, not to pander to his ego by playing silly games.
‘I didn’t intend it to. Sorry. I’m afraid I have some rather bad news, Zoë.’ Glancing around, he spotted a couple of chairs in an alcove by the window and nodded towards them. ‘Let’s sit down over there, shall we?’
Zoë looked sharply at him but she didn’t demur. Walking over to the chairs, she sat down, smoothing her skirt over her knees. Ben caught a tantalising glimpse of her elegant legs encased in whisper-fine stockings and hastily averted his eyes. Zoë had always hated going out with bare legs—she preferred to wear stockings instead. He’d watched her put them on many times and enjoyed the experience too.
He gritted his teeth as an image of her drawing the fine silk over her shapely calves flashed into his head. This was dangerous territory and he refused to go there, especially today.
‘What’s this all about, Ben? What sort of bad news do you have to tell me?’
Her tone was sharp; it cut through his thoughts and helped him focus. Leaning forward, he fixed her with a level look. ‘The wedding has been called off.’
‘Called off?’ She stared at him in disbelief. ‘If this is a joke, Ben, I really don’t appreciate it.’
She went to rise but he caught hold of her hand and stopped her. ‘It isn’t a joke, Zoë. I wouldn’t joke about something like this.’
She had the grace to look momentarily uncomfortable before she rallied. Sinking back down onto the chair, she eased her hand out of his grasp. ‘I apologise. So tell me what’s happened.’
Ben shrugged, needing a little more time to regain his own composure. The feel of her slender fingers had released a whole raft of emotions he hadn’t been prepared for. If he’d moved on, as he’d thought, why was his heart thumping as though it was trying to leap out of his chest? He’d held her hand, for heaven’s sake, not made mad, passionate love to her!
‘Heather called it off,’ he explained, closing his mind to any more foolish ideas of that nature. He refused to torment himself by recalling how good it had been when he and Zoë had made love. ‘She told Ross that she’d decided it would be a mistake if they got married.’
‘A mistake?’ Zoë’s brow wrinkled. ‘But they’re perfect for each other. Anyone can see that.’
‘Well, apparently, anyone would be wrong.’ Ben sighed when he saw her face close up. ‘I don’t mean to sound facetious but I was as stunned as you are when Ross told me. In fact, I’m still trying to take it in. I was all geared up to do my best man bit when I woke up this morning, but it seems my services won’t be needed after all.’
‘Is that why you’re dressed like that?’ Zoë glanced down at his jeans, her nose wrinkling in distaste as she took stock of the crust of mud that adorned them, and he chuckled.
‘It wasn’t a deliberate choice because I was peeved about not getting to read my speech, if that’s what you’re thinking.’
A tiny smile twitched the corners of her beautiful mouth. ‘I’m glad to hear it. It would seem a little extreme.’
Her eyes rose to his and his breath caught when he saw the warmth they held. It had been so long since Zoë had looked at him this way. In the last painful weeks of their relationship all they’d done was argue. There’d been no warmth then, no fun, no closeness, just a determination on both sides to get their own way. All of a sudden Ben regretted how he’d behaved, regretted pushing her to accept how he’d felt. No wonder she had run away when he’d put her under so much pressure. Maybe he had loved her desperately but he should have tried to win her round in a different way.
Regrets tumbled around inside his head but it was too late for them now. At least he and Zoë were on speaking terms and that was something. ‘I ended up getting called out to an incident at the canal,’ he explained, hoping to solder their fragile truce. If there was one thing that Zoë truly cared about it was work— his job, her job, anything to do with medicine. ‘In fact, Ross went along as well, and the rest of the guys from the surgery. That accounts for my current less than sartorial look. It was extremely mucky down there.’
‘Good heavens!’ Zoë leant forward and he could see the interest in her eyes. ‘It must have been a major incident if Ambulance Control drafted in so many extra people.’
‘It was, although normally the rapid response unit would have had it covered,’ he explained, responding to her enthusiasm. One of the best things about their relationship had been the fact that they’d shared a love of emergency medicine. They’d spent a lot of their time discussing the cases they’d seen, although now that he thought about it, Ben wondered if it was normal for a couple to spend so much time talking about work. Had it been a way to paper over the cracks in their relationship, perhaps?
‘Why weren’t they able to deal with it today?’ Zoë asked curiously.
Ben pushed the thought aside. In truth, it shouldn’t have bothered him and the fact that it did had him hurrying on. ‘Most of the emergency response vehicles are out of commission at the moment. There’s a problem with the fuel supply, apparently. That’s why the surgery was contacted, and how Ross and I ended up helping out. It certainly wasn’t what we had planned for today.’
‘No, of course not.’ Zoë sighed. ‘Poor Ross, he must be devastated. And Heather too. She couldn’t have taken such a decision lightly.’
‘I don’t imagine so,’ Ben concurred, wondering if he should explain that Ross hadn’t appeared to be that cut up about what had happened. In the end, he decided not to say anything. People responded differently and who was he to judge?
‘What’s happening about the guests?’ Zoë frowned as she looked around the foyer. ‘I expect a lot of them are staying here. Do they all know that the wedding has been called off?’
‘I did my best to let everyone know, but I wasn’t all that successful, unfortunately.’ He saw the question in her eyes and continued. ‘Ross gave me the guest list and asked if I’d do the honours. I got in touch with as many people as I could, but some had already left home by the time I phoned. Ross has arranged for the vicar to meet any who slipped through the net when they turn up at the church.’
‘What a mess!’ Zoë exclaimed. ‘It’s going to cause a real stir, isn’t it? I’d hate to be in Ross’s or Heather’s shoes for the next few weeks.’
‘It won’t hit Heather as hard. She’s gone to London— caught the train last night, I believe. At least she’ll be spared a lot of the flak.’
‘I see.’ Zoë gave a little sigh and then stood up. ‘Well, thanks for letting me know what’s happened, Ben. It’s a real shame, but if it wasn’t going to work, it’s probably best that Heather called things off.’
‘I’m sure you’re right,’ Ben agreed, feeling something akin to panic grip him. Was that it? Was Zoë going to bid him goodbye and leave? There was nothing to keep her here now, nothing and no one.
That thought stung more than it should have done and it annoyed him too. He was over Zoë and he refused to let her influence his life in any way, shape or form. He stood up as well, a polite little smile curving his mouth, a smile that was guaranteed to convince her that he was well and truly over her. ‘When are you flying back to Paris?’
‘Tomorrow lunchtime.’ She glanced at her watch and grimaced. ‘I’ve got hours to kill now, unless I can re-book onto an earlier flight.’
‘Sounds like a lot of hassle to me,’ he said lightly. ‘Why don’t you stick to your original plan and enjoy a day here instead?’
‘Doing what?’ She glanced down at the elegant suit that clung to every delicious curve of her body. ‘I didn’t exactly come equipped for a weekend in the country.’
‘I could lend you some stuff.’ He managed a couldn’t-careless smile when she looked at him, although he was as surprised as she was that he’d made the suggestion. ‘All you need is a pair of jeans, a sweater and a jacket,’ he continued because there was no way he could stop now he’d begun. ‘And you’re ready for anything.’
‘Such as what?’ she demanded with a touch of challenge in her voice.
‘Oh, I don’t know…how about a hike up into the hills to get some fresh air?’
He glanced out of the window, using the moment to gather his thoughts. He hadn’t planned on spending any time with Zoë while she was here, but wouldn’t it prove, once and for all, that he was over her? Ever since he’d seen her name on that guest list he’d felt uneasy and he hated feeling that he wasn’t in control. Zoë had hurt him badly, destroyed his faith in love and commitment, all the givens he’d once believed in. He may appear the same old Ben on the outside, always up for some fun and ready to enjoy a joke, but inside he was a completely different person.
He no longer believed that love could conquer any obstacle. He no longer believed that two people were meant to be together. When Zoë had left him, turned her back on him and his love, she had destroyed all those certainties he had taken for granted. He would never love anyone the way he had loved Zoë. He would never allow himself to love that deeply again.
‘It is a gorgeous day,’ she said wistfully, and he glanced back at her.
‘Is that a yes, then?’
‘I don’t know.’ Her gaze lifted to his and he saw her mentally raise the barriers. ‘I didn’t plan on spending any time with you, Ben.’
‘I’m sure you didn’t.’ He ignored the jibe, didn’t even flinch when the arrow pierced his skin. He knew how she felt, that she didn’t want him and never would. Zoë didn’t do commitment. She didn’t do love and marriage and happy-ever-after, and he had accepted that. However, this time with her could be just what he needed to lay the past to rest.
‘I didn’t plan on spending time with you either, Zoë, but neither of us could have foretold what was going to happen. Why don’t we make the best of a bad job?’
His tone was calm and it seemed to work. He saw her relax and carried on, inwardly smiling. He had women falling at his feet, women eager to spend days—and nights!—with him but he didn’t want any of them at the moment. He wanted these few hours with Zoë to prove he could cope without her.
‘We’re both at a loose end this afternoon and we can fill in the time by having a walk, maybe even have dinner later if we’re not too knackered by then.’ He shrugged, a gesture that reeked of indifference even though he wanted this very much. ‘At least the weekend won’t have been a complete loss, will it? So what do you say, Zoë? It’s up to you.’
CHAPTER TWO
THEY drove to Capper’s Fell and parked in a lay-by. Zoë got out of the car, trying not to think about the last time they’d been there. There was no point looking back when she wouldn’t have done things any differently. She didn’t want to get married, didn’t want children, didn’t want to spend her life with Ben or anyone else. She had seen the damage love could do, suffered because of it, and she didn’t intend to give anyone that much power over her.
‘I thought we could walk to the top and down the far side if you’re up to it,’ Ben announced as he joined her and she nodded.
‘Fine by me.’
‘Sure you can manage in those boots? They are a little on the large side for you.’
He crouched down and began tugging at the laces of her borrowed boots. One of his sisters had left them at his house, he’d explained, and although they were half a size too big, Zoë had assured him they would be fine. Now she found herself wishing that she’d told him they had fitted perfectly. At least then she wouldn’t have had to suffer in silence as his fingers gently prodded her toes.
Heat flashed along her veins and she shifted her feet, wanting to make him stop. She could cope so long as Ben didn’t touch her, didn’t make her remember all the other occasions when his hands had caressed her. He’d been such a passionate lover, showing her with his hands and his mouth how much he had wanted her. Zoë had tried to hold something of herself back, to not respond so fully, so completely, but she’d never succeeded. When Ben had made love to her, she had given him everything—her heart, her mind and her soul. And that’s what had scared her most of all. She had no control when she was in Ben’s arms.
‘They’re perfectly adequate for the amount of walking we’re going to be doing today,’ she said briskly, moving away.
‘Good.’
He didn’t react to her brusqueness as he straightened and contrarily Zoë wished he had done so. At least she would have had an outlet for her feelings if they’d had one of their rows.
She sighed as she followed him to the stile. Was that what she really wanted, to fight with him like she’d done in the last weeks they’d been together? Every day had been a battle, every minute they’d spent together so full of tension that she’d felt sick all the time. Ben had wanted her to give in and accept that they could be happy together for ever and ever, but she’d known it wouldn’t work.