The Baby Issue

He carried her to the bed and laid her down on it, his expression saying all that needed to be said as he looked at her for a long moment.

Anna took hold of his hand and placed it on her stomach, pressing it gently into the swollen hardness. “Love me, Ben,” she whispered. “Please.”

It was all the invitation he required.

Anna closed her eyes as passion claimed her, letting her heart have its way and her head be silenced. Maybe this was wrong and she would regret it, but she couldn’t bear to stop what was happening. She couldn’t bear to deny herself this time in Ben’s arms even if it was a mistake!

Dear Reader,

The Baby Issue focuses on a topic that arouses strong emotions in a lot of people: surrogacy.

As I researched the background for this story, I was in contact with several women who had been childless until a member of their immediate families had offered to be a surrogate for them. Their tales were inspirational, and I am indebted to them for sharing their experiences with me.

I hope that you will read this book with an open mind and heart, and feel as I did that my heroine, Anna, made the right decision when she offered to have a baby for her sister. It seemed only right that she should find the perfect man in Ben Cole to share her life with after all the heartache she had been through. There is nothing better than a happy ending!

My very best wishes to you all,

The Baby Issue

Jennifer Taylor

www.millsandboon.co.uk

CONTENTS

COVER

LETTER TO READER

TITLE PAGE

CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE

CHAPTER FOUR

CHAPTER FIVE

CHAPTER SIX

CHAPTER SEVEN

CHAPTER EIGHT

CHAPTER NINE

CHAPTER TEN

CHAPTER ELEVEN

COPYRIGHT

CHAPTER ONE

THE taxi had dropped her off outside the surgery. Anna Clemence took a deep breath as it drove away.

She was on her own now.

She had made her decision and there was no going back on it. She owed it to Jo to do the very best she could.

A shadow darkened her grey eyes as she thought about her sister. It was a month since Jo had died yet she still found it hard to believe that she would never see her again. Jo had always been there for her in the past but now she had to stand on her own two feet. There would be no one to turn to in the coming months, no one to offer emotional or financial support. She only had herself to rely on from now on.

Anna picked up her suitcase then pushed open the surgery door. Dr Adam Knight, the senior partner at the practice, had explained that he couldn’t be there to meet her that morning. However, he had assured her that his colleague, Benedict Cole, was expecting her. Now, as she joined the queue in front of the reception desk, Anna couldn’t help hoping that she wouldn’t have to wait long to see Dr Cole. She had been up since five that morning and she was starting to flag.

‘I’m Anna Clemence,’ she began when she reached the desk. However, the middle-aged receptionist didn’t give her time to finish.

‘Oh, you must be the new practice nurse! Ben said that you would be arriving this morning. I’ll just give him a buzz to let him know that you’re here.’

The woman quickly relayed the message then smiled at her. ‘Ben said to tell you that he’ll be free in a few minutes, so why don’t you take your case through to the staffroom and wait in there? It’s been like a madhouse in here this morning. It’s supposed to be emergencies only on Saturdays so I don’t know where they’ve all come from!’

‘Thanks.’ Anna smiled back, warmed by the older woman’s friendly manner. ‘I’ll do that.’

She made her way through the door at the rear of the waiting room and quickly found the staffroom. Putting down her case, she went to the window and looked out but there wasn’t much to see apart from the car park.

She turned and looked around the room instead, smiling when she saw the mismatched assortment of crockery stacked on the draining board and the extra-large jar of coffee strategically placed next to the kettle. The room was almost a replica of any number of staffrooms at places where she had worked in the past so that she felt instantly at home. Was it a good omen? She hoped so. She needed all the luck she could get at the moment.

‘Hi, there. Sorry you’ve had to wait. I don’t know what’s come over everyone today. Saturdays are never usually this busy!’

Anna looked round as a man appeared. The room was rather dark so that she couldn’t see him clearly at first. She just had an impression of someone tall with fair hair before he switched on the light.

He had to be at least six feet tall, she decided, taking rapid stock as he came towards her, with a leanly muscular physique which the conservative navy trousers and paler blue shirt he was wearing couldn’t disguise. His hair was a rich sandy-blond colour rather than merely fair, the kind of shade that a woman would pay a small fortune for at the hairdresser’s, she thought inconsequentially.

With hair that colour she expected his eyes to be blue, so it came as a surprise to see that they were a very dark brown, the same colour as his eyebrows. It was only when she noticed the amusement they held that she realised she had been staring at him and quickly looked away.

‘I’m Ben Cole,’ he said, offering her his hand. ‘Adam explained that he couldn’t be here to meet you, I believe?’

‘He did.’ Anna fixed a smile to her mouth as she shook hands, hoping that her discomfort didn’t show. Ben Cole was a very attractive man and it probably wasn’t the first time he’d caught a woman staring at him. However, it wouldn’t do to give him the wrong impression. ‘He said that you’d let me have the keys to the flat.’

‘I’ve got them right here.’ He handed her a bunch of keys then looked round, frowning when he spotted her suitcase by the door. ‘Is that all you’ve brought with you?’

‘I didn’t think I needed anything else,’ she replied quickly, deeming it wiser not to explain that the case held all her worldly goods. It would only give rise to more questions and that was something she wanted to avoid at all costs.

She experienced a momentary qualm as she wondered what would happen when Ben Cole and his colleagues found out what she had omitted to tell them. Legally she’d had no need to say anything, of course. There were rules governing the type of questions that could be asked at an interview, so she hadn’t done anything wrong by withholding the information, though she knew that it would have been common courtesy to have mentioned the fact before she had accepted the post. Now all she could hope was that by the time she was forced to tell everyone the truth, she would have proved herself capable of doing the job.

‘Probably not.’ Ben treated her to an openly quizzical look. ‘I don’t suppose it was worth bringing too much stuff with you when you’re only going to be here for four months or so. To be honest, I was surprised when Adam told me that he had found someone willing to take the job. Not many people are interested in short-term contracts, especially not someone with your experience. I believe you used to work at St Luke’s in London. In the renal unit, wasn’t it?’

‘That’s right,’ Anna replied, feeling her nervousness increase when she heard the curiosity in his voice. ‘I dealt mainly with children and teenagers, doing home support visits to those who were undergoing dialysis or were hoping to have a kidney transplant. I really enjoyed it, too.’

‘So what made you decide to give it up?’ he asked with a heavy frown. ‘It seems a strange thing to do, especially if you enjoyed the work so much. Taking this post doesn’t strike me as a career move.’

Anna bit back a groan as she realised that she only had herself to blame for giving him an opening to ask more questions. She really must be more careful and watch what she said.

‘I had to move back to Cheshire to be nearer to my sister. She…well, she needed me here and I moved in with her for a while,’ she finished lamely, wishing she had never got into this conversation in the first place.

‘Really? Why was that?’ Ben leant against the sink unit and studied her thoughtfully. Anna could feel his warm brown eyes travelling over her face and had a sudden mental image of the reflection she had seen in the mirror that morning. She sighed.

The past weeks had taken their toll and there was no escaping the fact that she looked vastly different to how she had previously. She wasn’t vain but she knew that a lot of men had found the combination of lustrous black hair and a porcelain-fine complexion attractive in the past.

She’d always thought that her mouth was too big but several had remarked that it was her best feature. Others had commented on her deep grey eyes, framed by lashes so thick and black she never needed to use mascara. However, that had been then and the reflection she had seen that morning had born little resemblance to how she had looked once upon a time.

‘My sister had endometrial cancer. Unfortunately, they didn’t find out what was wrong with her until it was fairly advanced,’ she explained, realising that he was waiting for her to answer his question. She shrugged but she could feel the pain biting deep inside her once again. ‘The doctors did all they could, and at one point we thought that Jo was going to make it, but it turned out that there were secondaries. She d-died a month ago.’

Anna swallowed hard because she didn’t want to make a fool of herself by breaking down in front of him. She jumped when he suddenly reached out and squeezed her hand.

‘I’m sorry. I know how hard it is to deal with something like that, especially in our line of work. You tend to think that you should be able to find a cure for everything, but sadly that isn’t the case.’

Anna looked up when she heard the pain in his voice. ‘Did you lose someone close to you through illness?’

‘Yes. That’s why I know what you must be going through.’ He gave her hand a final squeeze then let it go. ‘Anyway, let’s get you up to the flat and then I’d better get back to work before Eileen has a riot on her hands!’

She laughed softly because she knew that he was making a deliberate effort to lighten the mood. It was obvious that whatever had happened in Ben’s past still hurt him and she couldn’t help wondering what had gone on before it struck her that it was none of her business. She, more than anyone, should understand his desire not to talk about it.

He picked up her case and led the way to a staircase at the end of the hall. ‘There’s another flight of steps leading up to the flat from the car park, so you can come and go that way rather than having to trail through the surgery. However, it’s handy being able to use these stairs of a morning. I know Beth found it useful.’

‘Beth’s the nurse who I’m covering for, isn’t she?’ Anna asked, following him upstairs.

‘That’s right.’ He glanced over his shoulder as they reached the top of the stairs. ‘She used to live in the flat before she moved in with Adam.’

‘You mean Dr Knight?’ she asked, frowning.

‘That’s right.’ He laughed as he put her case down by the door. ‘It’s a long story which I really don’t have time to go into at the moment. But if you ever get the chance, ask Beth to tell you all about it. I never used to believe in fate but I do now!’

Anna laughed. ‘That sounds very intriguing.’

‘Oh, it is, believe me!’ He smiled at her and she felt a trickle of heat flow through her veins when she saw the warmth in his eyes. ‘Anyhow, I’d love to stay and talk to you for longer but I really must go. We’re usually finished by eleven so if there’s anything you need, just give me a shout.’

‘Thank you,’ she said softly. Maybe it was silly but she couldn’t help noticing that he was looking at her like a man looked at a woman he found attractive.

‘Oh, and in case I forgot to say it before, I’ll say it now—welcome to Winton surgery, Anna. I hope you’ll be very happy here, even if it is only for a short time.’

He disappeared down the stairs before she could reply. Anna heard him speaking to someone at the bottom, heard a burst of laughter flow up the stairs and smiled. Maybe it was a bit too soon to make up her mind but she had a feeling that she was going to be very happy here. She sensed that she could grow to like Ben Cole once she got to know him better and…

And what? a small voice whispered in her mind. What if she did grow to like him? What if he liked her? What if they found each other attractive, even? Exactly what did she hope would come out of it? What future could there be for a woman in her situation?

Anna felt the little bubble of happiness burst. Her future was all mapped out and there was no place in it for Benedict Cole or any other man!

Anna spent the next hour unpacking and finding out where everything was kept. Although the flat was small there was everything there that she would need, which was a good job, bearing in mind how little she had brought with her.

She had lived in staff accommodation in her last job so she’d not had to worry about furniture and crockery or the hundred and one other things needed to set up a home. It hadn’t been a priority when she had moved in with Jo either, but at some point soon she would have to make provision to buy all those things, even though she had no idea where she would get the money from. After all, there wasn’t just herself to think about now.

She sighed as she felt a familiar wave of panic wash over her. She had promised herself that she would try to remain positive but it wasn’t easy when she knew the difficulties she was going to face. All she could do was keep reminding herself that she wasn’t the first woman to have found herself in this situation, even if the circumstances were rather unusual in her case. Other people had managed and so would she!

That decided, she went into the kitchen to make herself a cup of tea. It was only when she opened the fridge that she realised she didn’t have any milk or tea bags—or anything else for that matter. In the rush to get packed that morning to leave her sister’s home, she had given no thought to the subject of groceries, but she would have to do something about it soon.

She fetched her bag then went to the back door, hunting through the bunch of keys Ben Cole had given her to find the one that fitted the lock. She tried several in turn but none of them worked. It left her with no choice but to use the exit through the surgery, even though she had wanted to avoid doing that until she was officially on duty.

Anna started down the stairs then paused when she heard a commotion break out below. She could hear a woman screaming but she couldn’t make out what she was saying. She hurried down the rest of the stairs and followed the noise to the waiting room, taking in the scene that met her at a glance.

‘Give him to me,’ she ordered, rushing forward and taking the child from the terrified mother’s arms. It was a little boy, about two years old, and he was deeply unconscious, his eyes rolled back into his head and his lips tinged blue. Putting her ear to the child’s chest, Anna assured herself that he was still breathing then turned to Eileen.

‘Which way is the treatment room?’

‘This way. I’ll show you.’

Eileen flew out from behind the desk and led the way, opening the door to the treatment room for her. The child’s mother was sobbing hysterically now so that Anna had to raise her voice to be heard.

‘Tell Dr Cole that we need him in here straight away, please.’

Anna didn’t waste any time as the receptionist hurried away. She laid the little boy on the couch and quickly unzipped his coat. ‘When did this happen?’ she asked the sobbing mother.

‘Just a few moments ago. Sam was up most of the night with earache, which is why I brought him to the surgery this morning.’ The young woman wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. ‘He felt really hot when I dressed him and he wouldn’t eat his breakfast, which just isn’t like him. He seemed all right when we got here but then he went all…all stiff and started twitching.’

‘I see.’ Anna slipped off the child’s coat and quickly removed his jumper and trousers as well. Hurrying to the sink, she filled a bowl with tepid water then looked round when Ben Cole appeared.

‘What have we got?’ he asked, hurrying to the couch.

‘He appears to have had a convulsion. His temperature is elevated so I was about to sponge him down,’ she reported crisply, carrying the bowl back to the couch. ‘His mother says that he was complaining of earache through the night.’

‘Fine. You get on with that while I check him over.’ He didn’t say anything more as he quickly set about examining the little boy, but Anna had seen the approval in his brown eyes and she felt her heart lift.

It was nice to know that Ben appreciated her efforts, she thought as she started sponging the child’s hot skin. Maybe it was silly to set any store by his opinion but she knew that it meant a lot to her.

‘Classic signs of a febrile convulsion,’ he said, sotto voce, glancing at her. ‘See how flushed his face and neck are, and the rigidity of the limbs and slight arching of the spine.’

‘I thought it was that,’ she said, equally softly. She ran the damp cloth over the little boy’s chest once again. ‘I think this is helping, though.’

‘It is. The best thing you can do in a case like this is to cool the child down.’ He grimaced. ‘Sorry. I don’t need to tell you that, obviously!’

Anna laughed at his rueful expression. ‘Don’t worry. You can’t afford to be thin-skinned when you’re a nurse. Most doctors seem to believe that they are the fount of all knowledge.’

‘Ouch! I’ll have to watch my step in future, Nurse Clemence. I wouldn’t want to trip over my ego in front of you and end up flat on my face.’

His eyes were teasing, making it clear that he knew that she’d been joking. Anna smiled back before she realised how dangerous it was to let the conversation continue in that vein. She had to remember that this job was simply a stopgap and not get involved with the people she worked with. It would make it that less painful when the time came for her to leave.

She carried on sponging the little boy and was rewarded when he started to come round a few minutes later. Ben turned to the child’s mother and smiled reassuringly at her.

‘He’s back with us again. I know it’s been a shock for you but try not to let him see that you’re upset. We want to keep him as calm as possible to give him time to recover.’

‘He will be all right, won’t he?’ the girl asked shakily, digging a crumpled tissue out of her pocket and scrubbing her eyes with it.

Anna took the bowl of water to the sink and emptied it away then plucked a handful of clean tissues from the box on the counter and gave them to her. She hadn’t realised how young the mother was until that moment because she’d been too busy dealing with the child to pay much attention to her. Now she couldn’t help sighing when she realised that the girl was little more than a child herself.

‘He should be fine. He’s had what we call a febrile convulsion, which isn’t nearly as scary as it sounds.’ Ben drew the girl forward then gently picked up the little boy and placed him in her arms. ‘All it means is that the bit of his brain that usually lowers the temperature when it gets too high didn’t work properly. I believe you said that he had earache last night?’

He carried on when she nodded. ‘He probably has an ear infection and that’s what caused his temperature to rise. I’ll check him over once he’s recovered properly but I don’t want you to worry too much. A lot of small children have febrile convulsions but they usually grow out of them.’

‘Does that mean it could happen again?’ the girl asked worriedly, hugging the whimpering child to her.

‘It’s possible, but you can do a lot to prevent it happening again by taking some simple precautions like giving him paracetamol at the first signs of fever and sponging him down,’ he explained calmly.

‘I wish I’d known that,’ she said miserably. ‘If I’d realised I could give him paracetamol I would have done so.’

‘You must make sure that it’s one formulated for young children,’ he warned her. ‘And that you don’t exceed the dosage. However, there are a number of very good products you can buy over the counter.’

‘Do they cost a lot?’ The girl shrugged but Anna could see the flush that had risen to her cheeks. ‘I’m on my own, you see, and some of these things cost a lot of money…’

She tailed off, not that she needed to say anything else. Anna turned away because she was afraid of what might be written on her face at that moment. She ran water into the sink and washed the bowl, barely listening as Ben explained that he would include a child-safe analgesic on the prescription so that Sam’s mother wouldn’t need to buy it.

‘Anna.’

She jumped when Ben touched her arm, feeling the colour rushing to her face when she saw the concern in his eyes.

‘Are you all right?’ he asked softly.

‘Fine. I was just trying to catch my breath,’ she explained hurriedly.

‘No wonder. It’s been a real baptism of fire and you’re not even officially on duty yet,’ he agreed, but she could tell that he hadn’t fully believed her explanation.

Fortunately, little Sam started crying in earnest at that point so he had no time to question her further. Anna realised that she had to be more careful in future and make sure that she separated her personal feelings from her professional responsibilities. She couldn’t afford to let one affect the other if she hoped to get through the coming months.

Ben quickly examined the little boy and, as suspected, it turned out that Sam had an ear infection. Anna stayed with them because she didn’t think it was right to leave even though the crisis was over. The little boy was obviously very distressed and his mother, who had told them that her name was Lucy Wilkins, didn’t look much better.

Ben drew Anna aside while the young mother tried to console the screaming toddler. ‘I know this is a huge imposition, but would you mind if I left Sam and Lucy with you while I finish seeing the rest of my patients? I want to make sure that he’s all right before she takes him home.’

‘Of course I don’t mind,’ Anna assured him. She glanced at the sobbing child and sighed. ‘He’s really upset, poor little mite.’

‘He must be in a lot of pain because the infection is quite severe, especially in his left ear. I’ve got some sample sachets of analgesic in my room so maybe you could get some of that down him.’

He grimaced as the little boy started screaming louder than ever. ‘You might have more luck than his mum. I get the impression that she’s been having a rough time with him of late, not that it’s any surprise. It isn’t easy, bringing up a child on your own.’

‘It isn’t,’ Anna agreed hollowly. She summoned a smile when Ben looked at her, afraid that he would tell that the comment had touched a nerve. ‘If you let me have that analgesic, I’ll see if Sam will take it from me.’

‘Thanks, Anna. I really appreciate this.’

Ben hurried back to his room and came back a few minutes later with a sachet of the analgesic, but he didn’t stop. Anna knew that he must be anxious to get back to his other patients so she merely took it from him then set about finding a plastic measuring spoon in one of the drawers. Little Sam was sobbing his heart out by that time, his face bright red with temper and pain, and Lucy had tears in her eyes as well.