Wife For Real

“But tell me this, my sweet, who do you hate most?” About the Author Title Page CHAPTER ONE CHAPTER TWO CHAPTER THREE CHAPTER FOUR CHAPTER FIVE CHAPTER SIX CHAPTER SEVEN CHAPTER EIGHT CHAPTER NINE CHAPTER TEN CHAPTER ELEVEN Copyright

“But tell me this, my sweet, who do you hate most?”

Jordan continued, “Me for showing you what you’re capable of feeling? Or yourself because, for those few minutes, you acted like a real woman, not a scared little girl!”

Jordan let her go, his gaze contemptuous as he strode back up the path. Katherine watched him go with tears burning in her eyes. She wanted to scream after him that it wasn’t true, but he wouldn’t believe her. Why should he? Both of them knew what had happened that night. One year later she was still paying for it.

Jennifer Taylor was born in Liverpool, England, and still lives in the northwest, several miles outside the city. Books have always been a passion of hers, so it seemed natural to choose a career in librarianship, a wise decision as the library was where she met her husband, Bill. Twenty years and two children later, they are still happily married, with the added bonus that she has discovered how challenging and enjoyable writing romance fiction can be!

www.millsandboon.co.uk

CHAPTER ONE

KATHERINE felt the ripple of excitement which ran around the church as another guest arrived for the wedding. It had to be someone really special, she mused, to have caused such a stir. She turned to see who it was but one of the ushers was blocking her view of the newcomer.

She turned back, and smiled as she caught her brother’s eye. Peter gave her a brief smile in return, then looked away almost immediately. He seemed lost in a world of his own as he sat with his head bowed and his fingers worrying the carnation pinned to his lapel.

Katherine frowned, wondering not for the first time what was wrong. It was normal for the groom to be a little nervous on his wedding day, but even last night, when they’d had dinner together, Peter had appeared unusually tense. He had eaten only a few mouthfuls of the meal she had prepared for them, but had drunk rather too much of the wine which had accompanied it.

Katherine had been tempted to say something about that. But she had consoled herself with the thought that Peter would have drunk far more if he had gone out with his friends for a stag night party. She had been delighted when he had asked if he could spend the evening before the wedding with her, yet now it struck her as an odd thing to have done. Was there something wrong? Something that Peter hadn’t told her...?

‘Katherine.’

She recognized the deep voice at once and her heart seemed to stop beating as she turned to look at the tall, dark-haired man standing beside the pew. ‘Jordan... what... what are you doing here?’

‘Where else would I be on such a special occasion?’ He smiled cynically as he slid into the seat beside her. ‘I’m sure people would start wondering what was wrong if I didn’t turn up for your brother’s wedding, and that’s the last thing we want, isn’t it? So let’s set everyone’s mind at rest straight away.’

Before Katherine could guess what he intended, he leant over and brushed her mouth with a kiss. His lips were cool, despite the heat of the June day. They sent a tingle, almost like a shiver, racing through her. Katherine jerked her head away, her grey eyes darkening in shock as they met the mocking blue ones which were staring at her.

‘Smile, darling. Everyone’s watching.’ Jordan laughed softly, so softly that Katherine knew she was the only one to hear the taunt in his voice. ‘I’m sure they’re all delighted to see husband and wife having such a touching reunion—today of all days.’

Katherine drew back abruptly. She could feel the shock rippling through her; frissons of alarm were mixed with other feelings she didn’t want to think about too hard right then. ‘I... I had no idea that you were coming. Charles never mentioned that you would be back in time for the wedding.’

‘Didn’t he? But then Charles only manages the firm in my absence. He isn’t my confessor. I don’t report everything I intend to do to him.’ Jordan smiled, but his eyes were hard. ‘You’ve seen him recently, then, I take it?’

Katherine nodded, wondering why she felt so uncomfortable. It was the way Jordan was looking at her, his expression almost accusing, although she had no idea what she was being accused of.

‘I saw Charles on Thursday night, as it happens. He’d managed to get tickets for the final performance by the Russian Ballet. It was kind of him to invite me to go with him.’

Her grey eyes challenged him to disagree but Jordan merely shrugged. ‘Very kind. But then that’s the sort of man Charles is—kind and considerate. Nothing at all like the man you married, Katherine.’ He gave a deep laugh as he saw her colour rise at the mocking comment. ‘Still, Charles does lack my one real virtue. He doesn’t have my money, does he? What a pity. He could be perfect apart from that rather large flaw.’

Jordan picked up the service sheet and started to read through the list of hymns. Katherine took a small breath but it didn’t help. She could feel herself trembling, and hated the feeling that she wasn’t in control. It was all due to the strange way Jordan was acting—that plus his unexpected arrival, of course.

She frowned, wondering why he had turned up like this. He had always been meticulous about letting her know if he would be attending any function they had been invited to. So why hadn’t he done so this time? After all, it was a system which had worked well over the past year. Appearing together on the odd occasion kept up the front that their marriage wasn’t the sham they knew it to be.

Jordan had made it plain when she had told him that she could never live with him that he didn’t want anyone to know the truth. Katherine had been happy to agree to his demands because they suited her as well.

It had proved surprisingly easy to convince everyone that their marriage was a success simply by attending a few engagements together. Jordan was out of the country on business so often that they had the perfect excuse to keep those occasions to the minimum—no more than three or four in the past year, in fact. Whenever they met, he treated her with a cool courtesy which had soon quietened any fears she’d had as far as his motives were concerned.

They lived virtually separate lives beyond that. When he was in London, Jordan either slept at his club or Katherine went to stay with her father so that he could use the flat in Mayfair. He travelled extensively, overseeing the latest projects his company was working on, so that sometimes Katherine found herself wondering how much time they would have spent together anyway, even if they hadn’t come to this arrangement.

Business came first with Jordan, and nothing was allowed to get in the way of it—especially not any unsavoury gossip as to the state of their marriage. But surely it would make more sense in the not-too-distant future for Jordan to rid himself of a wife who didn’t fulfil his needs, and find another who did?

Katherine gave a small, bitter smile as she glanced at him. But then why would he choose to go to all that trouble when there must be many women eager to supply everything he wanted without him making such a commitment? Jordan could easily have his cake and eat it. Katherine was certain that he did!

He must have. sensed her watching him because he suddenly turned. His eyes darkened as they rested on her delicate face in its frame of soft blonde hair. The expression in them was hard to define.

‘Mmm, one might almost think that you missed me, Katherine. Did you? After all, it’s been... what... almost two months since we saw one another last?’ He laughed huskily. ‘They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, don’t they?’

‘So I believe. However, like most maxims, there is always another to contradict it.’ She gave a sharp laugh and felt her heart beat a little faster as she heard how false it sounded; she wondered if Jordan had heard its falseness too. Try as she might she could never be truly indifferent to him. There was just something about him which got under her skin no matter how hard she fought not to let it affect her. ‘Out of sight, out of mind seems appropriate in this case.’

She looked away, yet she couldn’t deny that she felt shaken by what he-had said. Why on earth should he imagine that she missed him? The more distance there was between them the better, as far as she was concerned, and she would have thought he felt that way as well.

The organist suddenly struck up the bridal march to announce the arrival of the bride. Katherine stood up with the rest of the congregation. Her arm brushed Jordan’s and she drew away at once, but it would be impossible to avoid touching him.

The tiny village church was packed with guests and there was little room to move—far too little to avoid making repeated contact. Yet each time it happened Katherine felt another jolt of awareness run through her, so that by the time the ceremony was over her nerves where in shreds. Maybe it was that which made her overreact when Jordan took her arm as they followed the bride and groom down the aisle.

‘Let me go!’ Katherine dragged her arm out of his grasp as she glared up at him with stormy grey eyes.

‘Surely you’re going to forgive me darling?’ Jordan smiled, but his eyes were glacial as he took her arm again and held it firmly. ‘I did try to get here sooner but it was one delay after another. Flying back from Tokyo is a little more difficult than getting here from Mayfair!’

Katherine heard someone behind them laugh in appreciation of Jordan’s wit. She only wished she could share their amusement. However, another glance at Jordan’s face warned her that it would be a mistake to cause a scene.

In silence she let him lead her from the church, waiting until they were well away from the rest of the guests who were milling around as the photographer tried to organise them into groups. Only then did she wrench her arm free again, making no attempt to hide her displeasure.

‘Oh, dear, something does seem to have upset you. I suppose you’d better tell me what it is and get it over with.’ Jordan raised a lazy brow, although his face was hard behind the smiling mask. In the sunlight she could see silver streaks in the dark hair at his temples and the tracing of fine lines which netted his eyes at the corners.

Jordan would be forty in a year or so’s time. He had lived his life on the edge for so long that the years had left their mark on him, even though they hadn’t softened his attitude. What Jordan James wanted he got; what he didn’t like he discarded. Katherine wondered slightly hysterically which category she fell into.

‘You know perfectly well what’s wrong!’ she retorted sharply, stung by the thought.

‘Even if I weren’t too damned tired to play guessing games, this is neither the time nor the place for them.’ He glanced over her shoulder, his eyes narrowing as he watched the crowd moving about. ‘We’ll be wanted in a moment, so if there’s something you want to say then let’s hear it, Katherine. I don’t want you creating scenes all day long because you’re spoiling for a fight.’

His words took her breath away, and it took a few moments before she could speak. When she did her tone was like cut glass, each word sharp and clear, so that there would be no danger of him misunderstanding. ‘I’m not spoiling for a fight, Jordan. I’m not interested enough to argue over something as trivial as your sorry lack of manners!’

‘Indeed?’ He gave a soft laugh as he leant back against the trunk of a spreading oak tree. Sunlight filtered through its leaves, dappling his face with shadows, making it suddenly hard for Katherine to see his expression clearly. ‘So it’s my lack of manners which is bothering you, is it? I’m afraid you’re going to have to explain that, as I have no idea what you mean.’

She drew herself up, feeling suddenly uneasy. What was it about the way Jordan was acting which made her feel as though boundaries which had been set a long time ago had been crossed? She tried to shake off the feeling but it stayed at the back of her mind, unsettling and disturbing.

‘It’s quite simple. I had no idea that you would be here today. I thought that you were still involved in negotiations for the new contract with the Japanese. Quite apart from the fact that Charles never mentioned you were coming home, I spoke to your secretary only a couple of days ago and that’s what she told me.’

‘And she was right. I had no idea I would be able to get back in time for the wedding until yesterday, and even then it was touch and go in case something went wrong. The Japanese struck a hard bargain, but in the end we managed to come to an agreement which suits us both.’

Katherine didn’t doubt that. Nor did she doubt that the contract Jordan had secured would be a lucrative one. His business acumen was legendary, his hard-headed approach earning respect and fear from allies and competitors alike.

J.J. Engineering had won contracts for an impressive list of civil-engineering projects worldwide in the past few years. The Japanese contract would be yet another guarantee that the firm would earn more kudos. It wasn’t what interested Katherine, however.

‘I see. However, hearing that you were still tied up, I naturally assumed that you would be unable to attend the wedding. I informed Mr and Mrs Hartley accordingly and offered your apologies. Turning up like this without warning is inconsiderate in the extreme, Jordan.’

‘Oh, dear, is that what’s bothering you? The table plan? Now I understand. You must forgive me, Katherine, but I hadn’t given any thought to that. How could I have been so lacking in the social graces? It’s a good job I have you around to put me straight whenever necessary, isn’t it?’

Katherine’s face flamed at his sarcasm. She swung round, refusing to remain there and allow him to mock her. However, before she had managed to take even a step, Jordan caught hold of her wrist and stopped her.

He swung her back to face him, his eyes devoid of any trace of amusement as he stared into her angry face. ‘Don’t lie, Katherine. If nothing else, at least do me the courtesy of telling me the truth. You don’t give a damn about upsetting Mr and Mrs Hartley’s arrangements, do you? It’s the fact that I turned up here without warning you beforehand that’s eating you, isn’t it?’

He slid his hand beneath her chin, forcing her face up to meet his contemptuous stare. ‘What’s the matter, my sweet? Afraid that I might want to take a few more liberties now that I’ve overstepped the mark this far? Worried that I might be growing tired of this marriage of ours and thinking about changing the rules? And who could blame me?’

He stared at her for one long moment more before abruptly letting her go. ‘I believe we’re wanted. I suggest we leave this discussion until later. I’m sure neither of us wants to spoil your brother’s big day.’

He walked away, not bothering to look back to see if she was following as he joined the other guests. Katherine watched him pass some comment, heard the laughter which ran around the group. Jordan had charm by the bucketful when he chose to use it, but it left her cold...

She ran a hand over her hair to smooth the silky waves back from her face. She could feel her hand trembling but wouldn’t allow herself to think of the reason why—apart from the fact that she loathed any kind of a scene. She smoothed her jacket down too, the lace rippling beneath her fingers. She had chosen the outfit because it was her favourite colour—pale cream, cool and elegant.

She always dressed in understated colours—cream and beige, navy and black. Her hand hesitated on the expensive cloth as she suddenly wondered why.

Did she wear them as some sort of disguise, so that she could hide from the world? Wasn’t it her biggest fear that one day someone would guess that behind the cool façade another woman existed? No one had ever suspected it apart from her. It had lain hidden, dormant, until that night when Jordan had shown her exactly what she was. The shame was something she would have to live with all her life. The only way of coping with it was never to allow it to happen again.

Katherine took a slow breath and then made her way over to the group. She stood beside Jordan as the photographs were taken, and played her part, smiling for the camera, looking pleased that she was there to witness her brother’s wedding. She didn’t allow herself to think about her own wedding just one year earlier, let alone remember what had happened on her wedding night...

CHAPTER TWO

‘IF YOU’LL excuse me, I’ll just go and phone my father to let him know how everything went. Unfortunately, he hasn’t been well recently and the journey here would have been too much for him today.’

‘Give Adam my regards, Katherine, and tell him I’ll speak to him soon. But hurry back, darling. It’s been far too long since we had any real time together!’

Katherine saw the indulgent glances everyone exchanged and she avoided looking at Jordan as she made her way from the huge marquee which had been set up in the grounds of the Hartleys’ house, and took the path leading down the garden. Telephoning her father had been just an excuse to get away.

She followed the path until it reached the fence which marked the boundary of the property. Resting her arms along the rough wooden bars, she stared towards the distant hills while she tried to get a grip on herself, but it wasn’t easy.

The day had been a nightmare; the effort involved in playing her part had left her drained. Jordan had kept her at his side all afternoon while they had chatted to the other guests. He had been as urbane as ever, yet whenever she had glanced at him he had been watching her with an expression in his eyes which made her feel shaky even now, when she remembered it.

What did Jordan want with her? It was a question she had asked herself a dozen times yet she still didn’t know the answer. She just kept remembering what he had said in the churchyard earlier, about sticking to his side of their bargain.

Had it been said in anger to scare her? Or had there been a deeper intent behind those harshly spoken words? She had no idea, but the uncertainty made her feel sick with fear. She could cope with this marriage but only so long as Jordan didn’t try to make any changes!

A twig suddenly snapped and Katherine swung round, her heart turning over at the thought that Jordan might have followed her. She needed a few minutes by herself to get her emotions under control, although she wasn’t sure that it would be possible even then.

The way Jordan had been acting today seemed to have unleashed a whole torrent of fears so that she felt raw and exposed, as though a defensive layer had been peeled away to leave her more vulnerable than she had felt since the night of their wedding. When Peter suddenly appeared out of the trees, she gave a little gasp of relief.

‘Oh, it’s you!’

Peter paused when he saw her, then slowly walked over to join her. ‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. What are you doing here, anyway?’

‘I...I just felt like a breath of air,’ she hedged. ‘It’s very hot in the marquee, but everyone seems to be having a wonderful time.’

‘Yes. Diane’s parents have spared no expense in giving her a day to remember. Although perhaps she’ll prefer not to have any reminders of what a mistake she’s made!’

‘What on earth do you mean?’ Katherine felt her heart lurch as she heard the anguished note in her brother’s voice.

‘Nothing. Forget it.’ Peter turned to stare towards the hills, but not before she caught the glimmer of tears in his eyes.

She touched his arm in concern. ‘Obviously something is wrong, Peter. I had a feeling about it earlier, to tell the truth.’ She glanced round and frowned. ‘Where is Diane? Surely you two haven’t quarrelled, have you?’

Peter shook his head. ‘No, of course not. Diane’s in the house getting changed. We’ll be leaving shortly to catch our plane.’ He gave a harsh laugh. ‘The way I feel, I wish we were never coming back!’

‘Peter!’ Katherine stared at him in horror, more concerned than ever as she saw the strain etched into his thin face. ‘Please tell me what’s wrong and if there is anything I can do to help.’

‘There’s nothing you can do, Kitty.’ He gave another of those bitter laughs which were so out of character. ‘There’s nothing anyone can do!’

‘I don’t believe that.’ Katherine took a quick little breath to control the growing feeling of panic. ‘There is always a solution to every problem. It’s just finding it that is difficult sometimes. Tell me what’s wrong, Peter, then maybe we can work something out together.’

‘Like we did when we were kids? After Mother left, it was always you I ran to to solve my problems, wasn’t it? But somehow I don’t think you can help me this time—not unless you happen to have a spare fifty thousand pounds lying around.’

‘Fifty thousand pounds?’ Katherine repeated numbly. ‘Why on earth do you need so much money? It’s a fortune!’

‘Don’t I know it? And I have as much chance of getting my hands on that kind of cash as I have of flying to the moon.’ He ran his hand over his eyes. ‘It will mean the end of Diane and me once she finds out, of course. She’ll never forgive me and neither will her parents. And I love her so much, Kitty! I really do. If only there was a way—’

He stopped abruptly, and when he turned Katherine could see a glitter in his eyes which alarmed her even more.

‘Peter, what is it...?’

His hands clamped on her shoulders so that she winced. ‘Jordan! I should have thought of him before. Will you ask him, Kitty? Ask him to lend me the money? I swear I’ll pay him back somehow.’

Katherine shook her head, stunned by the request. ‘No... I couldn’t possibly. I mean, I don’t even know what you need it for!’

‘Because I’m a bloody fool, that’s why! I let a couple of the fellows I work with talk me into going to this gaming club with them. It was all just a bit of fun at first. I even won a couple of times. Diane was furious when I let slip what I’d been doing. She made me promise never to go again.’

‘But you did go?’ Katherine guessed. ‘And this time you lost? Oh, Peter, how could you be so stupid?’

‘I know. I know! I just kept telling myself that the next time I would win, but it never happened. Now the people I owe the money to are threatening to go to Diane’s parents. They’ve given me two weeks to come up with the cash. Two bloody weeks!’ Peter gripped Katherine even harder. ‘Jordan’s my only hope! Please, please, say that you’ll ask him, Kitty!’

‘I don’t know... I don’t know what to say...’ Katherine felt a lump in her throat as she saw despair settle over Peter’s face as he let her go.

‘I understand. I should never have asked you to do it. I...I’d better get back and see...’

She couldn’t stand it. She couldn’t bear to see him looking so dejected. ‘All right, then, I’ll ask Jordan.’

‘You will?’ Peter gave a whoop of joy as he swung her off her feet. ‘Oh, you don’t know what a weight that is off my mind!’

‘He hasn’t agreed yet,’ Katherine warned him.

‘But he will if you ask him!’ Peter gave her a quick hug. ‘I’d better get back to Diane before she thinks I’ve run out on her. You will ask him as soon as you can, though, Kitty, won’t you? I don’t want those people running to Diane’s parents and causing a fuss while we’re away.’

Katherine opened her mouth to repeat her warning that she wasn’t sure if Jordan would agree, only Peter was already hurrying away. She shivered as she turned to stare towards the shadowy hills again. The thought of asking Jordan for all that money scared her, but what else could—?